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Who's on first
2008-02-05 00:18:00
I have a boy in my class whose mother is deaf. Lately, he's been uncharacteristically mischevious (to put it nicely), so we've been trying to set up a conference with his mother. Of course, we need to have an interpreter to help us communicate with her. I had a similar situation last year, so I dug out a business card for a district interpreter that helped us back then.Last Friday, I sent home a note with this boy, A, saying that I had spoken with the interpreter, and she was free to conference this week, either on Tuesday at 3:00 or on Wednesday or Thursday at 1:25. I asked her to choose one of those three options that was best for her.This morning, I asked A if his mother had written back to me, and he pulled out the note. She had written, "I will come on Thursday at 3:00."Uhhhh, I hope you don't. This reminds me of the old Sesame Street skit where Grover would say, "I would like a hamburger and a Coke!" And the waiter would reply, "I'm sorry, sir, we don't have any ham...

Happy Belated Blogoversary
2008-02-05 00:16:00
Just shows ya how freakin' busy I've been...Last Wednesday, Learn Me Good the blog turned two years old. I can't believe I've been doing this for 730 days and change now...:)The cake is a little stale, but have a piece! Read all about Jack Woodson and his first year as a teacher in Learn Me Good, available at Amazon.com! Start with a preview here.
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Superbowl Wrapup
2008-02-04 02:49:00
Greetings everyone! I'm getting an early start on Monday's post, which is the second in myINTERACTIVE MONDAYseries. Thanks to everyone who participated last week. We all learned a lot about what our fellow teachers really enjoy teaching.This week, the question is:What was your favorite Superbowl commercial?This is of course assuming that you actually watched the game (and watched the commercials), but even if you didn't, you can always watch them online.I wasn't overly impressed with a lot of them, but I did find the Bud Light commercial with the cavemen pretty funny. "WHEEL SUCK!!" "BOTTLE OPENER SUCK!!"And the E*Trade commercial with the talking baby buying stock and then spitting up was frankly disturbing. Though, truth be told, the one time I tried to buy stock online, I spit up afterwards.OK, your turn! Share your thoughts!! Read all about Jack Woodson and his first year as a teacher in Learn Me Good, available at Amazon.com! Start with a preview here.

Video carnival
2008-01-31 05:33:00
It's Wednesday, so it's time for the Carnival of Education! This week's Carnival is hosted by Mathew and his site Creating Lifelong Learners. There are some interesting posts, including one by Mrs. Bluebird about what her students are REALLY saying when they talk about the weather, and this one over at Joanne Jacobs that asks if it's OK to pay students when they do well on tests. I've certainly considered that one myself.Hey, if you haven't seen Fractorix yet, go check it out right now! And if you HAVE seen Fractorix, why the heck haven't you commented on it yet? Chop chop, get to it!And while we're talking videos, let me humbly submit one of my very first attempts at a school-related video. This one is called, "Kids, Don't Tattle." Tattling has really gotten on my nerves this year, as I have several students who would rather tattle than breathe. Read all about Jack Woodson and his first year as a teacher in Learn Me Good, available at Amazon.com! Start with a previ...
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Where are your glasses?
2008-01-30 01:52:00
This week's Mr. Teacher column over on education.com is all about those kids who are supposed to wear glasses, but don't. You know what I'm talking about.There are some pretty cool styles of glasses out there nowadays! It's not like today's kids are wearing 3 inch thick coke bottle specs. But some of them would just rather have blurry vision I guess.Anyway, check it out and leave some feedback! Read all about Jack Woodson and his first year as a teacher in Learn Me Good, available at Amazon.com! Start with a preview here.
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What's your favorite topic to teach?
2008-01-29 06:21:00
Hey everyone,To celebrate my ginormous overnight increase in RSS subscribers, I was thinking about some ways to get my posts a bit more audience participation. I truly appreciate everyone that comments, and I was hoping to get more people involved.So, here is my idea (in really big letters):INTERACTIVE MONDAY!!!! I will pose a question, and then give my own answer, and then I welcome everyone else to submit their own responses to this question.So here's the question:Within the material that you teach (or have taught), what is your favorite topic and why?For me, there are several aspects of the math curriculum that I enjoy teaching. This week in fact is one of my favorite topics, geometry, which at a third-grade level, is identifying two-dimensional and three-dimensional shapes. It's hard to get kids to differentiate between pyramids and prisms, but it's always enjoyable and relatively simple.But I have to say that my favorite part of the year comes when science class focuses on t...
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We don't scream for ice cream
2008-01-27 19:19:00
On Friday, Ms. Jenn Ed and I were scheduled to have our second Lunch Bunch, for the kids in our classes who had done all of their homework for the previous three weeks. You may recall, the first time we did Lunch Bunch, we had a whopping 11 students (out of 41 on our rosters) who had done all of their homework. This time around, we saw a massive increase, as the Lunch Bunch swelled to THIRTEEN students!Unfortunately, I had an extremely long day on Thursday -- I was at the school from 7 a.m. until 8 p.m. -- and I just didn't have the energy to run by the store that night to buy ice cream. So Friday morning, I informed the kids that we would be moving the Lunch Bunch to Monday, when I would have a chance to get ice cream. They told me, almost unanimously, that they didn't care about the ice cream. They just wanted to do the Lunch Bunch with their teachers. I say ALMOST unanimously, because one of the little bratty girls in my class began shouting that she DID care about the ic...
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How's this for motivation?
2008-01-27 06:26:00
Saw an article in the paper today that said a nearby school district, Lake Dallas, will be staggering their end-of-year date next year. Everyone will start on August 25, but only the students who pass the TAKS will finish school on May 22. Those who do not pass TAKS will go an additional two weeks and finish in June.How great is this? I can't wait to see how works out, because I think this could actually be an incentive even to those completely apathetic kids that seem to be filling the seats nowadays. Sometimes it seems like failing grades mean nothing to them, having privileges taken away means nothing to them, even being held back a grade means nothing to them.But who in his right mind doesn't want an extra two weeks of summer vacation???Man, if I was on the board of education in my district, I would be putting this plan into action TONIGHT.Just think how it will affect the teachers, also. It won't be an extra two weeks of vacation for them, but during those two weeks, th...
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Guest who?
2008-01-26 06:49:00
Yours truly is the guest of honor over on another blog today --So You Want To Teach? Joel has graciously allowed me to post a top 10 list over there. It's the Top Ten Rejected Meanings of TAKS.Coming soon, to a T-shirt near you. Read all about Jack Woodson and his first year as a teacher in Learn Me Good, available at Amazon.com! Start with a preview here.
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Learn Me Good World Tour 2008
2008-01-24 01:47:00
Well, well, well, 2008 is shaping up to be a very busy year! A couple of weeks ago, Learn Me Good was placed on the Dallas Morning News DISD blog as a permanent link. (Now if I could just get them to review my book!)This Friday, I will be "guest blogger" over at Joel's site, So You Want To Teach? (Now if I could just get Joel to review my book!)Next Wednesday, I will be attempting the Jeopardy online contestant test. If I successfully pass that, I will undoubtedly go on to reach Ken Jennings-esque proportions of wealth and fame. (I wonder if Alex Trebek would review my book?)On February 7, I will be the guest speaker at my old high school's National Honor Society induction ceremony. I have absolutely no idea how I'm going to keep a group of 300 or so high school students interested in what I'm saying, but as long as I can find some way to keep the flop sweat from showing too badly, I think I'll survive. It's still a few weeks away, so I'm not a raving lunatic of anxiety just ...
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RSS can beat YOUR SS
2008-01-23 04:23:00
I'm sorry to disappoint all of you Princess Bride fans out there, but the fact is RSS does NOT stand for Rodents of Substandard Size. But then, to quote Princess Bride once again, Get used to disappointment. ;)No, RSS stands for Really Simple Syndication, and it is a tool that is widely becoming more popular and more used. It's almost, sort of, not exactly, but pretty much like TiVo for your television. Instead of having to scour the TV Guide and set up your timer for each program that you want to catch, you just tell your TiVo the name of the program that you want to watch, and it records it for you whenever that show comes on. If the show doesn't come on, nothing gets taped. If the sci-fi channel shows a New Year's Day marathon, every episode gets taped.RSS serves a similar purpose for the Internet community. Instead of hopping from one blog to the next, taking a peek in the hopes that something new has been posted, all you have to do is subscribe to that blog's RSS f...
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Just break into song
2008-01-23 00:28:00
Howdy folks, Here's your Tuesday invitation to check out this week's Mr. Teacher column over on education.com.It seems like kids are able to remember material so much more easily when the material is put to a catchy song. So why can't we do that with EVERYTHING? In this week's column, I attempt a few lyrics that could help kids remember things like volume, the three branches of government, and spelling words with a silent k.Check it out! And please, validate my very existence by leaving a comment! :) Read all about Jack Woodson and his first year as a teacher in Learn Me Good, available at Amazon.com! Start with a preview here.
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Is a 50 good??
2008-01-19 23:38:00
Raise your hand if you've ever heard THAT question asked by one of your students before.The kind way to answer this is, of course, "Not only is 50 NOT good, it's so bad that when you make a 50, it's going to rain because angels are crying."Recent discussion here in Texas has centered around those grades of 50. Currently, 50 is the lowest allowable grade on a child's report card. If little Jimmy did absolutely no work whatsoever during a grading period, he still gets a 50 on his report card. Now educators are crying, "Jimmy earned a zero, let's give him a frakkin' zero!"Thankfully, in third grade, I haven't had many kids who do absolutely nothing in class. Even the lazy ones do at least take their tests and do some of the class work. I've also been told that if a child is going to fail, I should give him/her a 68 or a 69 rather than a grade in the 50s. That way, if the child gets his act together, he could scrape together an overall passing grade for the semester.It wil...
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I got 'em!!!!
2008-01-17 04:02:00
I'm going to the Final Four, baby!I was victorious in my quest on eBay, and I managed to score two tickets in the Alamodome!! Sure, I'll have to bring a box or two of Kleenex since I'll be in the nosebleed section, and the players on the court might look like ants, but I'LL BE THERE!!!!! WOOHOO!!!!!Now, the only problem will be if the final four teams are North Carolina, Kentucky, Connecticut, and Michigan. I'll have a hard time rooting for anyone if that's the case. Read all about Jack Woodson and his first year as a teacher in Learn Me Good, available at Amazon.com! Start with a preview here.

Is it Tuesday already?
2008-01-16 04:20:00
Not quite hump day yet, but it IS time for another Mr. Teacher column over on education.com!This week, the topic is that mystical aspect of maturing that third-graders SOMETIMES display upon coming back from winter holidays. Unfortunately, my kids this year don't seem to have metamorphosed just yet.Check it out, and if you're REALLY cool you'll even leave a comment and rate it! :) Read all about Jack Woodson and his first year as a teacher in Learn Me Good, available at Amazon.com! Start with a preview here.
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Whose brain are you using?
2008-01-16 03:57:00
Benchmark tests are being given this week, and they are always an annoying interruption to our instructional schedule. We have to rearrange our rooms, proxy another class while they test, and lose hours of valuable class time.Today was the math benchmark. There was a question on this test that asked, "What is the best estimate for the height of a table?"A) 30 yd.B) 30 ft.C) 30 in.D) 30 mi.The majority of kids in the third grade chose B, 30 ft.This reminded me of an afterschool jam session I was present for last year. One of the math department people from the district had come to our school to talk to all of the math teachers. One of the specific examples that she referenced was a question on a previously given TAKS test that said, "What is the best estimate for the length of a boot?"A) 7 yd.B) 7 ft.C) 7 in.D) 7 mi.Of course we all knew that many of the kids had chosen 7 feet as their answer.The lady asked us, "So what do you think you should be asking a kid who chooses 7 feet as th...
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50K, baby!
2008-01-15 01:52:00
At some point today, Learn Me Good hit the 50,000 mark.That's pretty darn cool. Now if I could just sell that many books or get that many views on YouTube I would be set for life. Read all about Jack Woodson and his first year as a teacher in Learn Me Good, available at Amazon.com! Start with a preview here.
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Identity theft!
2008-01-14 03:01:00
There was a story in the Dallas Morning News yesterday about how several Texas school districts are handing pertinent information, such as Social Security numbers, over to a private software company. The information in question happens to be identifying data for kindergartners in these schools. Oh, and all of this is being done without the parents' permission.That just sounds wrong on principle. But here is the statement in the article that really stood out to me:A privacy expert says thousands of 5- and 6-year-olds are vulnerable to identitytheft as a result.When I read this, I just had a mental image of little schoolchildren crying and claiming, "But I didn't get my chocolate milk yet! You gave it to someone else!" REMINDER!!!Please continue to tell people about Fractorix, as the more views it registers, the more visible it will become to people outside of the education field. And if you haven't yet left a comment over on YouTube, please go and do that! Read all about Jack...
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Ladies, The Spider is single once again
2008-01-11 04:24:00
The Green Goblin, Dr. Octopus, and Sandman -- turns out they were nothing compared to the writers at Marvel Comics.Spider man is married no longer.I saw this story in USA Today today (echo echo), and I couldn't believe my eyes. I used to be a big comic book aficionado, and I actually own the very special issue of The Amazing Spiderman where Peter Parker and Mary-Jane Watson tie the knot. Shy, nerdy geeks (with and without the proportional strength of the spider) everywhere celebrated vicariously as one of our own was able to score marital bliss with a hot redhead lingerie model.That was over 20 years ago!!But now, not only is the marriage over, but it's been annulled -- as only a comic book could annul it. A magical character has completely erased any evidence of the marriage. It's as if it never happened.I wonder if they will fit this to make Spiderman's meeting with Jackrabbit Man, who was bitten by a radioactive jackrabbit and gained the proportional strength and ability of a ...
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2 for the price of 1
2008-01-10 01:28:00
This week's Carnival of Education is up and running, this time at the blog of The Columbus Education Association.The generous hosts there were kind enough to include TWO of my submissions this week -- the education.com column about The Bourne Congruency, AND the Fractorix video!Looks like lots of good articles over there, so check them out! Read all about Jack Woodson and his first year as a teacher in Learn Me Good, available at Amazon.com! Start with a preview here.
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The Bourne Congruency
2008-01-09 00:18:00
I have to say, I am particularly proud of my Mr. Teacher column on education.com this week. As many of you know, I am a television/movie fanatic. So I seize any chance I get to write plot descriptions for fake movies and TV shows that are based on actual movies and TV shows!In the column this week, I suggest a few filler shows and movies for the gap that has been created due to the writers' strike. There are takeoffs on Die Hard, the A-Team, and the Bourne franchise, among others.Check it out, and if you like it, please leave a comment! Read all about Jack Woodson and his first year as a teacher in Learn Me Good, available at Amazon.com! Start with a preview here.

Fractorix
2008-01-07 03:22:00
Don't you just hate all of those prescription medication commercials on television nowadays? I don't want to see a turtle smoking a cigarette, I don't need to view people that look a lot like food items, and I most certainly don't need to see 60 year old men getting turned on by a little blue pill.So instead of witnessing any more of these commercials, I decided to make my own. I put it up on YouTube today.Check it out, and if you like it, please tell your friends about it! Read all about Jack Woodson and his first year as a teacher in Learn Me Good, available at Amazon.com! Start with a preview here.

How I spent my Christmas vacation
2008-01-05 18:34:00
I realize that some people may have already gone back to school, but for me, this is my last weekend of freedom before classes resume on Tuesday. So I thought I would do something a little interactive.If you are a reader of this blog, please leave a comment with some details about how you spent your break.As for me, I slept in way too much, played way too much Guitar Hero, and spent way too much time surfing the net.Let's hear from everyone else! Read all about Jack Woodson and his first year as a teacher in Learn Me Good, available at Amazon.com! Start with a preview here.
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Where's our prep time?
2008-01-04 23:12:00
Alas, today is a very depressing time for many teachers, at least throughout the local area. This is the last week day that we have off before returning to class. The kids don't return until next Tuesday, but we have to report back to school on Monday.The problem is that Monday is not a teacher preparation day. I just learned this yesterday from a fellow teacher. I knew that we would be having some meetings on Monday, but I figured we would also have several hours to work in our classrooms. This is necessary, as we usually return from break to find that all of the furniture in our rooms has been rearranged for the purpose of cleaning the floors.But according to one of my other friends, who is on my school's leadership team, Monday is strictly a staff development day, devoted to nothing but staff meetings and seminars. January 22, on the other hand, is the designated teacher preparation day. January 22 is a Tuesday, immediately following Martin Luther King Jr. Day which is a...
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The Carnival that Wants to Teach
2008-01-02 17:18:00
Happy Wednesday, people!This week's Carnival of Education is hosted by Joel over at So You Want to Teach? The good fellow even put my Christmas update in as his number 2 choice of the week! It's good to be number 2. Read all about Jack Woodson and his first year as a teacher in Learn Me Good, available at Amazon.com! Start with a preview here.

Resolutions and embracing technology
2008-01-02 04:59:00
Hello everyone, Welcome to the year 2008! Who knew this tiny third rock from the sun would still be around?Since it is Tuesday, I feel the need to throw a few pointers towards the current Mr. Teacher column over on education.com. This week, it's all about the New Year's resolutions. See if you can pick out the actual resolutions from the facetious ones.Also, I decided that 2008 is going to be the year that I finally give eBay a try. I've been monitoring NCAA final four tickets for a month or two now (with no success), but now I've actually got an item up for sale! Go on over there and bid a couple of hundred dollars. I'll be your best friend.Happy new year everyone. Don't forget to continue signing the guestbook from a couple of posts ago! Read all about Jack Woodson and his first year as a teacher in Learn Me Good, available at Amazon.com! Start with a preview here.
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New Year's Greetings
2007-12-31 23:25:00
Hello readers!It's 2008! Or at least, as I'm writing this, it WILL be 2008 in just a few hours. So like they say in the song, "May old acquaintance be forgot..." and let's make some new acquaintances!As I like to do at the beginning of a new year, I'm going to throw open the guest book once again!Here's how this works -- if you are reading this, please leave a comment listing your name, your location, and one interesting fact about yourself.I look forward to hearing from all of you in the new year!Be safe! Read all about Jack Woodson and his first year as a teacher in Learn Me Good, available at Amazon.com! Start with a preview here.

Oprah drops the ball
2007-12-29 00:52:00
As astute viewers of this blog may have noticed, I have taken down the graphic that displays how long it has been since I sent my book, Learn Me Good, to Oprah .That's right, it was a year ago today that I dropped a copy of my novel in the mail, with dreams of stardom dancing through my head. 365 days later, not even a rejection letter rubber stamped by the big woman herself.Sure, I can naïvely hope that my book is packaged away somewhere, misplaced in a large crate in some anonymous warehouse, right next to the Ark of the Covenant. And that someday soon, Oprah or some member of her team will happen upon it and declare it the next Great American Novel.More likely, however, pages 135 through 142 are lining the bottom of her parrot's birdcage.Oprah, if you're reading this, please at least take a glance at the content before Polly does her business?? Read all about Jack Woodson and his first year as a teacher in Learn Me Good, available at Amazon.com! Start with a preview here.
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Juicy attire
2007-12-26 21:08:00
Merry Christmas, everyone! It's a day late, but here is the weekly reminder about Tuesday's Mr. Teacher column on education.com.This week, I advise parents to be aware of what their kids are wearing to school. For instance, anything with the word "juicy" stitched across the butt is a general fashion no-no...Check it out and let me know what you think! Read all about Jack Woodson and his first year as a teacher in Learn Me Good, available at Amazon.com! Start with a preview here.
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Christmas update
2007-12-23 05:25:00
I don't normally write a form letter at the end of the year. But I get plenty of them, so I figured, why not? Here is what I sent out this year...Merry Christmas , everyone! It's that time of year for rum-heavy eggnog, recycled fruitcakes, and long form letters to friends and family, recapping the entire year!I normally don't do this sort of thing, but since I am supposedly an actual "writer" now, and since everyone else does it, I figured now would be as good a time as any to begin. So without any further ado, here was my 2007 in a nutshell.In January, the new year started off with a bang as I woke up at 12:30 p.m. Sleeping in rocks! On the 27th, I walked around my neighborhood for an hour, thus fulfilling my resolution to exercise more in the new year.February was a time for new love, and shortly after Valentine's Day, I met a wonderful, beautiful young lady who touched me in ways I had never been touched before. I have to say, I didn't really like being touched with t...
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