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HDR Photography and Other things
2007-10-13 21:00:00
To the photographer, a scene like this is problematic because of the range of light values across the frame. In the window you have the bright sky and the facade of the building. If you were to meter for those, everything in the foreground would be lost to darkness. If you were to meter for the foreground, anything bright would be blown out (white). In the past, photographers would solve this issue by using multiple exposures.They still are, although the process has become a little more complex. The above photo (a second iteration of the one in this post) is an amalgamation of eleven (no, I'm not kidding) different exposures. Aperature f/11, shutter speeds from 1/250 down to 1/4". My computer took the better part of the morning and early afternoon processing these, as they are roughly 140 megabytes each. My computer's only 2.8 megahertz which obviously isn't enough. The program I use is called Photomatrix.If you clicked to see the other photo, you'll notice that this on...
More About: Photography , Things

UPS Sucks
2007-10-13 09:05:00
Ah, the United Parcel Service. Brown. No matter what their ads say, they suck a big fat ass.I was out of town most of today, and while gone it occurred to me that I was supposed to get a package today. I log on to their website to track the package, and indeed it was "out for delivery", and had been since 7:17am on Friday (the day it was supposed to be delivered).In light of this, I elected to come home prematurely because this package is something I need, right? So I come home late at night and stop by the concierge desk. No package. What?I went upstairs to my loft, once again logged on to the UPS website and found that the delivery has been rescheduled for Monday!Keep in mind this is a residential delivery. UPS makes residential deliveries until 7 in the evening. So this package was on the fucking truck for 12 hours and somehow they couldn't get it to my place. That's really odd to me because my desk is right by the window, and said window overlooks the front of the bu...
More About: Sucks

An Anxiety Free Day
2007-10-13 00:40:00
This photograph of a portion of my desk proves that I work a lot. Or, at least it proves that I get stuff overnighted to me and I have lots of papers laying around. Either way, this photo says a few things about me: I take my work seriously, I take anxiety medications and have to keep them in an "old man" box or else I'll forget whether I've taken them or not, I do not like to use pink paperclips, and I drink water as most other humans do. Make of it what you will.Today has been an extraordinarily good day. Last night was kind of rough at one point, but there were no repercussions upon waking. No morning anxiety to speak of at all. I had already prepped the day the night before, so all I had to do was shower, get dressed, and leave. That went smoothly.Once on the road, things again went smoothly. In fact, much better than that. Today was actually quite lucrative. Hopefully I won't jinx myself by saying this, but I may finally be getting good at my job. It's a combinat...
More About: Free , Anxiety

Everywhere With Helicopter
2007-10-12 23:44:00
Everywhere With Helicopter Eyeline the driveway Eye black the door Sky all around me Levels life from roof to floor Trees and knees are lovely Seek it, find the core I have grown to life Like all in silence Wait for more Everywhere with helicopter Hard to follow/swallow When I'm slow Everywhere with helicopter Sending off where lightning goes (censor of the lightning ghosts) I will try to fight them I will let them nowhere to go Try escape the pace I'll say "God bless you" Let me know We know the answers We fill us in I do not diminish Start to finish Front to end Everywhere with helicopter...I guess I've been a little obsessed with the sky lately. Above is a Guided by Voices song. Click here to watch a killer video. My favorite band.

The Last Record Store
2007-10-12 01:50:00
Bill's Record s and Tapes has been a Dallas staple since I was a young indie rocker, and actually much longer than that. They had a huge store on Spring Valley, but file-sharing and whatever else has hit the place pretty hard. Bill is still standing, though, and I encourage you to buy stuff from him. His website is here. They haven't updated the address; they're now on S. Lamar just south of Bellevue. Can't miss it. Plus he's got an E-bay store, too. I don't know its URL but I'm sure you can find it.They have an enormous selection of CDs and vinyl, and the friendliest staff anywhere. BUY SOMETHING FROM THE GUY. No matter what your taste is, he's got something to fit it. And no matter how much music you have, he's got something you don't. And he's got stuff you can't find on the web for free, you slackers. I just got The American Analog Set's The Golden Band. Just try to find that on the internet! Betcha can't. But it's a great record!And, no, this is not...
More About: Store

Late Afternoon Anxiety
2007-10-11 23:56:00
I have probably mentioned this before, but I've noticed a pattern: every day when I come back to the home/office from the field, within half an hour or so I get ramped up with anxiety. I'm not sure why this is, or what I can do to stop it, but I'll try to figure it out while I write this.Some days I have stressful days. Other days I do not. Some days are a mixture. It doesn't seem to be a variable, though. Yesterday I had a mixed day (mainly due to prescription problems), and today I had an almost stress-free day (everything went smoothly). And I experienced this late afternoon phenomenon both days, with today's episode being shorter but more intense. I don't think it's work related.Usually I do not eat lunch, so one of the first things I do is to eat something when I come in. Yesterday I ate very bad food. Today I ate pretty healthy. On Tuesday I actually did eat lunch and experienced the phenomenon anyway. It could be simple eating anxiety, though. I'm not ruli...
More About: Afternoon , Anxiety , Late

Life: in General
2007-10-11 14:48:00
The photo is an old one and it may have been on here before, but in my opinion it says something so I'm putting it up again.Sometimes life just beats the living hell out of you. It happens to all of us to one degree or another, but we're here until we're not so we might as well keep on standing.There was a time in my life during which if it were my job to be a road hazard barrel or whatever that thing is called, I'd had given up and been in the ditch a long time before this one was. People who persevere are inspirational whether they want or intend to be or not.With that said, what I thought would be one of those easy, laid back days of work isn't going to be. I've gotta drive out into fringe of civilization again. Actually to the fringe of civilization and then along it, before heading back into the city again. I must be back in the office by 3:30 this afternoon, so I can leave no later than nine. I'm glad that recently I've been more successful about waking up on tim...
More About: Life , General , Life in General

A Failed Entry
2007-10-11 02:15:00
Okay. I put a LOT of work into an entry tonight that just didn't work out. I could not get it coded properly. I'm not an internet genius, but I tried lots and lots of different ways to insert some charts into here and Blogger is apparently just stupid. The entry was supposed to be about apparent global warming and how it is affecting my psychological condition. Hence, the photo of the sun.I had a pretty good day, I guess. I frustrates me when things don't work, but before I starting working on this entry my day was pretty smooth in terms of work and stuff.A crisis had actually started to develop yesterday: with my insurance plan, I have to use a particular hosptial's pharmacy to fill prescriptions. They can do it mail order. The first time I filled a prescription with them I did it in person, and I asked them about this. They said to give them seven to ten days. So, ten days ago, as I was due to run out of Klonopin/Clonazepam, I called in a refill.Well, it's not here ...
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Guilt Sucks
2007-10-10 14:57:00
That is a new photo; I've photographed the scene before so it's probably recognizable if you read regularly. I just liked the light, that's all.Well, after yesterday's debacle I decided to go to bed at a reasonable hour, wake up early, and just go to work. I did my prep for the whole week on Monday, pretty much, but some tweaks have to be made each morning. I woke up half an hour ago and will walk out the door just as soon as I finish typing this up.I had a conversation last night that was pretty interesting. Should a person feel guilty about the thoughts that they have? Let's face it: we all have them. Maybe we want to screw our friend's girlfriend/boyfriend, or maybe we've thought about ways to beat our bosses half to death. I think -- or at least I hope (now that I've written it) -- that everyone has these types of thoughts that emerge from the darkest recesses of our minds now and then.Personally, I don't think they're harmful. Thoughts are only thoughts. What...
More About: Guilt , Sucks

Disaster
2007-10-10 00:41:00
I've had worse days, yes. But today wasn't a good one.It all began at 7:20am. I promptly hit "snooze" and was awakened sometime later, and promptly hit "snooze" again. Failing to set the backup alarm, the next thing I knew I had awakened only to look at the clock and find out that it was 9:59 in the morning. My itinerary today called for 6.98 hours on the road. That's car-time, not including meetings and trying to get paid. Remembering this from the night before, I literally jumped out of the bed and stumbled as quickly as I could to the bathroom, where I brushed my teeth and wetted down my hair. From there I went straight to the closet and got dressed.As I was doing that, it occurred to me that there was no way I could make the entire trip. It just wasn't possible. So when I got dressed I quickly hooked up the GPS and eliminated the stop farthest away. Friday was clear, and I'll spend the whole day in that city trying to drum up business.When I woke up it was evident ...
More About: Disaster , Aster

Please Welcome a New Contributor
2007-10-09 02:45:00
Everyone say hello to Jen, a new contributor to the blog who would like to share her experience with Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). Her experience with it has been so positive, in fact, that she's very busy and will not be able to write for us very often, but when she does I think we'll all find it enlightening. Her story can be found on the sidebar, or by clicking here.Again, thank you, Jen, for coming on board.Well, in spite of leaving the building only once today (to walk around the block) so far, I've had an extremely productive day. I don't have my database fixed the way I wanted, but I have reverted it back to a useful state. Also, it's actually good that I didn't go out delivering on the service today because this afternoon I received more work via FedEx, and had I gone out today I would have just ended up covering some of the same areas again, resulting in a waste of time and oh-so-pricey gasoline. So it's all worked out fairly well. I got a lot of little t...

Residual Weekend Problems
2007-10-08 17:52:00
Well, the sleeping problem has made its way into Monday. I woke at nine to the sound of maintenance pounding on the door. Yesterday evening I just couldn't stay awake any longer and ended up napping for four hours (my best guess...it could've been longer). Then, of course, I stayed up most of the night, unable to sleep because I'd pretty much just gotten up. I guess if you put everything together I got my eight hours, but I sure as hell do not feel like it.Obviously, my problem is that I did not prep for work last night, and so now I have to do that. I didn't finish the database, either...I forgot to make a backup before started that so now my most updated data is "in flux" and useless. Nevermind, though, I'll press on.Anxiety level is quite high. Nothing I can't manage, but quite high. It's probably a good thing I have desk work to do first.I've got quite a bit to do this week and need to hit the ground running today, so that's all I have for this morning. I hope...
More About: Weekend , Problems , Residual , Dual

Technocrati BS/311 Sucks
2007-10-08 04:42:00
Technorati ProfileThis will be deleted once the blog is "claimed". Move along...nothing to see here.I would like to say, however, that 311 sucks great big donkey balls.
More About: Sucks

Useful Google Tools
2007-10-07 21:44:00
This is totally off-topic, but as I sit here not wanting to do anything, I was looking for a particular service that Google provides to site owners. Haven't found what I'm looking for yet, but I ran into a bunch of other stuff that I had no idea existed, and they are actually pretty useful:Google 411 -- Like your phone company's 411, but better and free. 1-800-466-4411 (I'll be programming this into my cell phone today, for sure)Google Transit -- It helps you plan mass transit itineraries. It's not available for most cities, but Dallas is on there and I planned a few trips that I take normally. It's accurate.Google Ride Finder -- Shows you exactly where taxis, shuttle buses, and car services are in real time, along with dispatch phone numbers. GPS or something, I guess.Google Sets -- Harder to describe. You enter similar words in fields and it comes up with lists of similar things. For example, if you enter "FBI", "CIA", and "NSA", it will give you Mossad, KGB, MI5, MI6...
More About: Tools , Google Tools

Sleep Deprivation v.297
2007-10-07 18:41:00
It wasn't the number of hours I slept, so much...it was the way in which I slept. Having fallen asleep on the sofa for a few minutes last night, I went to shut down my computer before going to bed. My desktop's weird in that sometimes it locks up while shutting down, so I kind of have to stick with it for a minute or two. Well, I woke up just a couple hours ago in the same place, never having made it to bed.Here's a good article explaining why what I inadvertently did was a bad idea. There's nothing in it we don't know already: poor sleep aggravates anxiety disorders.This is two nights in a row for me, and three of four. I had been doing better for a while but this has been an extremely difficult habit to break. Why didn't I go to bed this morning after waking in a desk chair? It was already 8:30am and I didn't want to be in bed all day. As time has gone on I'm realizing it more and more that it was a mistake. Two or three more hours wouldn't have hurt anything. I...
More About: Sleep

A Photo of Me
2007-10-06 22:09:00
Yes, that's a self portrait. I tried doing some today, and even though I don't think I'm a bad looking guy, the ones that didn't have my face in them turned out much better. I've just never been good at photographing myself.The size jeans I'm wearing in the photo is 34, the same size I wore during college. However, a couple weeks ago I went and bought some slacks for work and got 34's, thinking that was my size. Well, they're too small.I went back and got 36's, then. Too damn big. Why the hell can't I buy pants?I don't know why I'm talking about this. Odd, I know. And the picture is odd. I'm just an odd person (but there's nothing wrong with that, right?).I did come up with one other decent self portrait that does have my face in it, but I will not share it here for reasons of anonymity.Okay, so today's Saturday. What have I done with myself? Not a hell of a lot. I took the train downtown eariler and just walked around, deliberately leaving the camera at h...
More About: Photo

Alcohol and Benzodiazepines (Klonopin, Xanax, Ativan, Valium, Etc.)
2007-10-06 01:00:00
I grew tired of screwing around with the database and went out while ago on something of a scouting trip for work. In my short travels I found the above car. Man, I'd love to buy and restore that thing. Apparently that's what their plans are, because when I asked if it belonged to a customer and, if not, how much they wanted for it, I was quickly informed that it was not for sale. For some reason I really want a second car that I can drive around just at night and on the weekends. A Triumph Spitfire would be ideal, but anything with character would do.Anyway, it's Friday and that means Google is about to be inundated with searches about drinking while on benzodiazepines. I figured I'd write a short post about it. A preemptive strike, if you will. I've talked about it before, but I've never given it it's own post, and the search engines seem to like that.The simple answer is, do not drink while taking a benzodiazepine. It's not a smart thing to do. Believe me, I'd ...
More About: Alcohol , Ivan , Vali

Fridays: Always Just Great
2007-10-05 15:42:00
Not the greatest photography in the world, I know. It is one of my newer ones, however, and I told you that my latest photography hasn't been anything special.There's a new podcast up that describes a dream I once had. It was fun to make. I looped part of a Tom Waits song for the music in the background, and recorded the monologue in one take. It's not the smoothest thing in the world but I kind of like it that way.In terms of work, Fridays are always a bit strange for me. First, traffic is always really bad, and it will be especially bad today because it's Texas/OU weekend. I'm not looking forward to going about my business at all. For those of you who are not familiar with this madness, the Wikipedia will give you the lowdown. Basically hundreds of thousands of insane football fans descend upon the city and I doubt a third of them even go to the game. A few years ago I made the mistake of going to Deep Ellum (basically the rock n' roll district) during Texas/OU weeke...
More About: Great , Always

Every Day is a Weird Day
2007-10-04 23:49:00
I know, I know. That's the same pig from yesterday. I had no time for any photography last night, and today I brought my camera but forgot my compact flash card. So this is what you get.This morning got off to a strange start. They usually do. This time, I had awakened at 7:01am, but I couldn't see the clock very well at my angle and swore it said 1:01 (as in pm). Well, obviously, that freaked me out. I laid there and looked at the ceiling for a moment just contemplating the mess I'd made, and then it occurred to me that I should get a better look at the clock. By that time it was 7:05. Relieved, I almost immediately fell asleep for almost another hour, which, of course, put me behind schedule. I then got up and started to finish prepping my workday before falling asleep in the chair once again. I honestly don't remember what time I went to bed last night, but I want to say it was a reasonable hour. Not sure why all this happened.I also had two really vivid dreams la...
More About: Weird

Another Odd Day in Paradise
2007-10-03 23:44:00
More folk art! I love it. This giant pig is a BBQ smoker located near Lake Lewisville, Texas. I've been wanting a photo of it for years, but always miss the freeway exit. As always, click on it to see it larger if you wish.And there's a new look for the blog, too. First I get my very own URL, and then a new header and a new template. I think it looks better, but there are a few things I can tweak if any of you have suggestions.Anyway, this morning was odd as noted in the post below. An auspicious beginning to the day, I guess. Well, I hate to report this but it actually got worse from there. As I was gathering up my things and preparing to leave, I was stricken with a pretty intense wave of anxiety. A really strong one. I think it must have been the short sleep (as always) and those crazy fire alarms catching up to me. I'd also had caffeine in the morning, which I very, very seldom do.So this big wave of anxiety hits right as I'm starting to get my things together an...
More About: Paradise

Blackout
2007-10-03 16:05:00
There has been some unexpected rain. Literally five minutes after I woke up (6:45am), the power went out all over the building. Yeah, the one day I awaken at my target time, there's no damn electricity! Funny, huh? I've written this post on the laptop and will try to post it when the power comes back up, as it has been doing for a couple minutes at a time every half hour or so. I'm going to have to be quick about it because the modem has to reboot. No wi-fi anywhere.And, of course, I cannot work without electricity/internet. I need Google Earth and my GPS software, which is on the desktop PC. Both require internet connections. There's nothing to do until the power comes back up for a sustainable period of time. I would rather not shave by flashlight. I could probably take a shower in the dark if need be, but no way am I shaving like that.So...I've been doing some thinking. Time for a site redesign. I was looking around at some things last night and should be able t...
More About: Blackout

Before and After
2007-10-03 01:06:00
I'll be honest with you: I can't think of anything to write about this evening. But I like to make at least one post per day so I thought I'd put up a before and after photography thing.Long ago, when people used film, the labs made color corrections and stuff for them. And now, with digital cameras, they don't. That makes programs like Adobe's Photoshop necessary.I have a camera that cost quite a bit of money, but still, it will not produce a decent photograph straight of the memory card. One reason for that is that I work from RAW files...the equivalent of a digital negative. But even if I set it to shoot in JPG or TIF, it still would not produce a quality photo. Some of the newer consumer cameras attempt to make adjustments themselves, but let's face it, there's not much computing power on board a $300 camera, and even if there were, computers just aren't smart enough to know what looks good.Now, in the above photograph, I overdid things. The colors are too saturat...
More About: Before and After

New Site Address
2007-10-02 16:04:00
Doesn't that look tasty? Last night's dinner. You can click on it to make it larger and even more tasty looking. Mmmm.Anyway, thanks to Agent Reyes and his technical support, I was able to switch BFE to its very own domain last night. The new address is:www.brainfriendenemy.comI recommend that you change your bookmarks or however you normally get here. Blogger is still hosting and they say they'll forward you, but I do not know that I trust them on that. It seems to be working fine for now, but please treat this as a site move and update accordingly.Last night I stayed up quite late with this but managed to wake up reasonably early. I do not feel like total crap. Things are good, and I have to go to work now.Have a great day, everyone!
More About: Site , New Site , Address

Links and Information
2007-10-01 21:49:00
Great Photoblogs:FrozenFlowerLife's Rich PageantPhotonben3wCityscapes by LPMthinsiteMuteUrban ViewsSaturated BlackWHATEVERLANDOne Day at a TimeFred Askew PhotographyBrent StirtonDallas: A Picture a DayLight InfusionHenrik Hansen Photoblog::memorieslikefingerprints::fisc himglasOther Links :Americans Todayphoto.net -- an invaluable resource for photographersHot Glass AudioShannon Palmer: Art, Photgraphy DesignInformation :Monitors:Smaller monitors may cut off the right side of the photographs. Bad monitors will make my photography look worse than it really does.

Journals of an Idiot #1
2007-08-25 18:54:00
The photograph to the left was supposed to be a grab shot...just something to depict the scene from which I write. Nothing special. But, somehow, I've stumbled onto a great composition, if I do say so my self. Now maybe the subject isn't that interesting, but the way the space and the objects play against one another works from an aesthetic point of view. And I didn't even have to leave my chair to do it. I guess that means my eye for composition's coming back. I did look at it through the viewfinder, after all. I did change up the lighting. This wasn't a total ad hoc throw away photo. But I've made what I consider to be a pretty good one with a minimal amount of effort. I've always been interested in photographs of workspaces, so perhaps I'm biased.Click to make it larger. In retrospect I think it's interesting that the shot is framed by parts of objects. The only whole objects are the ashtray and a notebook. It so happens that I smoked too much last night and...
More About: Idiot , Journals

Dating in the 21st Century (part 25)
2007-08-25 08:33:00
I was sort of hoping my friend down the hall would forget about me. He and his girlfriend are trying to fix me up with her cousin, a very good looking 40 year old woman.They didn't. A few hours ago I got a call I never should have answered. They were back from a gallery opening and wanted the four of us to hang out. Having been in front of a computer trying to figure out databases all day, I decided to go for it.Like I said, this woman is good looking. I'd seen her a couple of times before, but tonight she looked even better. There's really no other way to describe her other than "striking". Due to her being ten years older than me I'd been trying to avoid getting fixed up with her, but like I said, I needed to get out tonight.It was a pseudo-date. She knew they were trying to fix us up. I knew. But it was only half-way announced and I didn't attend the first part of it. So that made it a little easier to leave early.Leave early? Why? Beautiful woman! Well, she wa...
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An Unusual Night
2007-08-24 19:19:00
So I stayed up really, really late working on this database thing for work. When I finally decided to go to bed I was really sleep deprived and a mild anxiety attack, just bad enough to prevent me from going to sleep. Unable to lay down, I had to get up and do other stuff. By the time I finally got to bed it was four in the morning if not later.As a result, I'm not going to do my normal marketing today. I'm going to continue working on the database until I get it right. Having something like that straightened out will be very important for the long run, and it needs to be done at some point so it may as well be today.I don't have any photography or anything to post, unfortunately. I do, but it would have to go through photoshop first and I have to get to work.Have a good day, everyone.Don't stay up too late at night if you have anxiety disorders! That's really all the advice I can give.
More About: Night

Anticipitory Anxiety
2007-08-24 00:21:00
Okay, so that's a cop-out photo if there ever was one. First, it's way too hot to do anything outside, unfortunately. 98 degrees with 47 percent humidity. I've had enough of it for one day, thank you very much. Secondly, I was in an office building today and saw one of those really cheesy "carpet paintings" from the 1970's, complete with brass frame. You know what I'm talking about. The photo is of my closet light, but the composition is a rip off of that "artwork". Sadly, I'd rather hang the carpet painting on my wall than I would this photograph, but mostly for kitsch reasons.Anyway, the weird feelings and anxiety I felt this morning can probably be attributed to anticipatory anxiety, which would probably be normal after a "bad spell". For the most part I felt great all day long and was quite productive. Every now and then some anxiousness would creep in, but it was mild and never lasted long.I'd like nothing more than to go out to Fair Park and shoot photos, but a...
More About: Anxiety , Tory

Not Sure How I Feel
2007-08-23 15:52:00
Yesterday I proclaimed that my set back was over. Well, yesterday it was. This morning I feel quite weird, however. I woke up a little before 8:30. Normally I wouldn't be happy about that, but last night I stayed up pretty late working on what I would be doing this morning, so it doesn't really matter. I even managed to get a little ahead on this afternoon's paperwork. So whenever this passes all I have to do is get dressed, gather up my stuff, and leave. The way I feel? Anxious. Itchy. Not quite right in the stomach. Throat is tight. I cannot leave like this: I have a "100 mile" day ahead of me (actually more than that). And, of course, that's not 50 miles out somewhere to the country and 50 miles back. It's all urban miles. Forecast temperature is for 99 degrees. Right now, at 9am, it's already 84 with 79 percent humidity. I can't even begin to tell you what kind of beating it is to put on a shirt and tie only to work outside for probably 40 percent of the day...
More About: Feel

BASEBALL ALERT
2007-08-23 02:45:00
The Texas Rangers, who suck, somehow managed to beat the living hell out of the Baltimore Orioles in the first game of a double header today. The score was thirty to three. THIRTY. That's an American League record. Here is the box score.I wouldn't normally post this, but it's history. Any time a team scores that many runs it's a fluke, but a bad team? The Orioles' pen is spent and there's another game left to play. They're starting a guy with an ERA north of six. I'm betting we see some position players on the mound before tonight's over. Will update.On a side note, apparently I had the date wrong for this open-loft party or whatever. I thought Wednesday would be a weird day for such a thing.Edit: someone has told me that 30 ties the record for runs scored in a doubleheader. I'm not sure if that's true...seems kind of low to me. But if that's right the Rangers have already scored three in the first three innings of game two, so they've broken that. They're...
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