Cracked Ego Cracked Ego A place for me to put down some of my creative writings. I also use it as a posting source for illustraion friday, and other various art subjects. Articles
A Dirty War
2007-06-20 03:13:00 The reason for the post title is because of some disturbing news out of the dirt and grime camp. Sources embedded within enemy grounds have discovered a new weapon that could turn the war in their favor. They have apparently found a way of putting dirt and grime into our food, and quite possibly into the very air we breathe. This would mean that humanity would need a new weapon, one far more powerful than a simple vacuum cleaner.Sure, we all love vacuum cleaners. I mean they clean and...ummm, suck. However, most models on the market simply don't destroy dirt and grime to the degree that we yearn, and now need, them to. That is why I'm unveiling a conceptual sketch, to the public, for the next wave in cleaning:It doesn't have a name yet; although, I'm thinking something along the lines of The Grim Sweeper. It's about 20 feet tall, with rocket propelled cleaning action, and gun turrets for those pesky stains. I really can't say how much it would cost at this time; although, it p... More About: Dirty
A Sad Truth
2007-06-19 04:06:00 I was scared by a 1 pound bird today.Whew, that felt great to just put that out there.I was taking some laundry down, and I could feel something approaching me from above. Once I made sure that there were no blimps in the vicinity (that reminds me, something must be done about that guy -or girl- peeing from blimps.), I realized that it was a barn swallow; although, it could have been a bird from "Land of the Lost" the way I reacted. A state of cowardice engulfed me as my hands were thrown above my head and I went careening into the house. This incident has allowed for some soul searching, and I've come to this conclusion: I am completely terrified by a large percentage of Earth's animals.I don't know what it is about most animals, but they really freak me out. Maybe it's that I think most creatures genuinely want to eat me, I want to eat them; so, why shouldn't they? I'm not talking about just lions, tigers, and bears here, however. No, today I became Alvy Singer circa the lob... More About: Truth , Ruth
Adventures in Color: no. 2
2007-06-18 02:08:00 Here's a link to the first entry for you first timers.Here's this week's color:The fact that it's Father's Day played a large part in my picking of this color. When I was a kid my dad had this great car that was close to this color. I used to love riding around in that thing during Summer weekends with the windows rolled down and the breeze seemingly making the car fly. It's one of my best father/son memories, and this color reminds me of that.Alright, now let's hear what this reminds you of; remember, it can be just a series of thoughts if you like.Hope everyone had a good Father's Day, and I'm looking forward to your responses. More About: Color , Adventures , Vent , Advent , Ventures
The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (1920)
2007-06-17 04:57:00 The Cabin et of Dr. Caligari (dir. Robert Wiene) is the must-see film for anyone wanting to witness German expressionism. Of course, this is a must-see film for anyone truly interested in making movies.The film opens in a garden, where the film's protagonist (Francis) is explaining the reason behind his fiancée's (Jane) semi-catatonic state. We are then taken to a fair where we meet Francis' friend Alan. While at the fair the two partake in the show of one Dr. Caligari, who has a -you guessed it - cabinet containing a somnambulist (Cesare), whom he awakes to answer the crowd's questions. Alan asks, "How long have I to live?" to which Cesare replies, "Till the break of dawn." This, of course, comes true, and we have the plot's catalyst.I could go into the psychology aspects of the movie, how it gave rise to the horror genre, or any number of things. However, as a visual artist, I cannot look past the amazing visuals. My original idea for this post was just to paste up a bunch of... More About: Inet
Illustration Friday: Rejection (A Knight's Fear)
2007-06-16 04:37:00 (Please click on the picture to read the text.)This quick little doodle deals with the torment of a short knight. He travels all the way to the tower, fighting dragons and black knights, only to be turned away at the end. Poor knight. More About: Friday , Fear , Illustration , Frida , Rejection
I Read and Blog
2007-06-14 18:30:00 I posted about the novel The Chrysanthemum Palace last week, and mentioned that I was hoping it would be a pleasant surprise. Sadly, it wasn't the surprise packed extravaganza I had planned.The novel centers around the lives of three children born to Hollywood legends. Bertie Krohn, the only-child of a famous sci-fi show creator; Clea Fremantle, the daughter of an infamous actress; and Thad Michelet, son of the ultimate Hollywood Renaissance man. The story is narrated by Bertie in a book within a book format, and takes us through the "Three Musketeers' " struggles to fight the shadow of their parents.This is a character driven work, which upon reading up on Bruce Wagner, appears to be the norm. The only problem is, I didn't particularly care about these characters. I'm no writer, but shouldn't these people be fleshed out and become more three dimensional as the story progresses? After finishing this I was left thinking, "why did I waste my time?"It's a shame because the source... More About: Blog , Read
Wendell Grout: The First Zombie
2007-06-14 04:42:00 I was browsing through the ol' bookstore a few moths back, and came across a fantastic book, Dead Alive by Bor Neerg. It revolves around the journal entries from the first zombie, Wend ell Grout. It quickly became one of my favorite reads, and I soon wrote to Mr. Neerg for an interview. He replied two days ago, and I had a chance to ask him a few questions regarding this fascinating collection.****************************** *****************************Cracked Ego: Welcome to Cracked Ego, Mr. Neerg.Bor Neerg: Thank you for inviting me, Rob.CE: I must admit, I didn't expect a response so soon; I'm sure you get so many requests for interviews.BN: That's true, but you happened to catch me in some of my downtime.CE: Well, I really appreciate you taking the time.Let's get right to it. Where did you first hear about Wendell Grout's journal?BN: I was in a small village on the coast of Spain, spending time with my wife, Neela. One night I went to a bar, and overheard a conversation betw... More About: Zombie
I Forgot the Password For Immortality
2007-06-13 01:53:00 As the good readers of this blog may or may not know, I was in possession of the immortality password. I received it at an Ingrid Bergman auction, at which I obtained a small flask containing the precious code. However, as of 2 minutes ago -the time at which I was going to write this post- I forgot that which made me better than anyone else. If I don't remember it before 2 p.m. tomorrow, God will revoke my immortal license, and I'll have to sit on the bus with Issac Newton on the way to softball practice.WAIT A MINUTE!!! I wrote it down on a small piece of stationary and hid it behind a toilet in the Bill Clinton Presidential Library. I'll use my powers of persuasion -mixed with a bit of telepathy- to convince the head librarian to find and fax it to me posthaste.wait for it....wait for it...BONZAII!!!Now, all I have to do is reach for the paper and see....the drunken scribblings of what appears to be the words to the theme from Good Times. Although, I can still make out some o... More About: Password , Immortality , Sword , Immortal , Mortal
Adventures in Color: no.1
2007-06-10 22:24:00 First, let me give links to the two inspirations for this:A great COLOURlovers discussion.This fantastic article on poeARTica.I was planning to write a piece about the science behind color perception; however, that's been done plenty of times, by people more knowledgeable than me - in fact, it's done a few times in the links above.So in lieu of that, I want to see how different colors affect you emotionally.Each week I will post a different color, and I want to hear your responses to it. How does it make you feel? Does it make you think of something?, and so on. They don't have to be well thought out responses (probably better if they're not), just type what comes to you while looking at the swatch.If nothing else my fellow artists out there might get a bit of inspiration from a particular color.So here's the very first entry:(I highly suggest clicking on the color, as to see it on plain white.)I think of warmth when I see this color, almost like this should be the official col... More About: Color , Adventures , Vent , Advent , Ventures
Bombs, Commies, and Chewing Gum
2007-06-09 21:01:00 (Click image for larger view)Bomb s, Comm ies, and Chewing Gum ; there's a title for a blog if I've ever heard one.Anyway, this is my mini-tribute to one of my favorite comedies of all-time, Dr. Strangelove. It really shaped my sense of humor, and in turn, my style of art. However, most of the latter would have to go to A Shot in the Dark.It has tons of great lines, but I'll never forget the following: "Have you ever seen a commie drink a glass of water?"and"You know what will happen if you don't reach the President?""What?""You'll have to answer to the Coca-Cola company."Now it's time for AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION. I want to hear what you draw inspiration from. Did a certain piece of art (music, painting, film, etc.) change your way of thinking after seeing/hearing it? If so please leave your comment; operators are standing by. More About: Bombs
Future Blockbusters
2007-06-08 23:38:00 I'm a creative guy, it's documented in several books, and I work in several mediums. However, even with all the media I try to encompass, it never seems to be enough. So, I have decided to write two movies, well 4 really, that I feel will change the face of Hollywood - or at least the MJ Mart in the mall (sorry for the in-joke).As a special treat to the readers of this blog, I will write two short blurbs about the films that will be this generations Citizen Kane and Cannonball Run respectively. Enjoy!*********************************** ***************Cold Hands, Cold Heart A once successful American gynecologist, Bill, finds his business waning after complaints regarding his incredibly cold hands. These complaints just happen to coincide with the death of Bill?s pet gorilla Jub Jub. Realizing that Jub Jub?s death is related to his new found problem, Bill embarks on a mission to bury him in the jungle from whence he came. Along the way Bill makes the acquaintance of a young Peruvia... More About: Future , Block , Blockbusters , Lock
Illustration Friday: Suit (The Bond Suit)
2007-06-08 21:51:00 This week's Illustration Friday theme is "Suit." It got me to thinking about the power a suit can have over the people around them. That led to this little cartoon; on a side note, the woman is inspired largely by Jessica Rabbit. Enjoy!Click on the image for a larger view."Q, someone stole my suit again." More About: Bond , Lust , Stra
The Early Years
2007-06-07 21:53:00 Do you have some of the art you did as a kid? I do - well, one piece anyway, and I want to see some of yours.The masterpiece unveiled below exemplifies my love of castle-like, two-dimensional, cardboard boxes sitting on blue lines. There also seems to be some sort of blue line revolt. Judging by the composition, use of color, and level of depth, I'd say I was about 19 when I drew this (hold for typed laughter). Anywho, here's the face of God; so, look quickly.Oh, the memories.Alright, now show me some of your early work. More About: Early , Years , Year , Ears , Earl
They Just Won't Listen
2007-06-07 18:25:00 Here are two examples of people not listening, and the disaster they cause by not doing so.************************************** ***************************************** Gerber Baby Touching More Than Our Heartsby Bor Neerg - June 5, 2007Cute, cuddly, the face of a multi-million dollar corporation, and now an alleged sexual predator.Donnachaidh Brodie, 13 months, has been accused of sexually assaulting 32 year old Monica Heritch during a photo shoot on May 15th, 2007. Police raided the Brodie residence yesterday afternoon during his prearranged nap time."I was going through my bag looking for a new roll of film ", said Heritch during a press conference, "and I suddenly felt this hand caressing my hindquarters. I turned around, and there was Mr. Donnachaidh fondling me like his favorite toy Mr. Nibbles . I told him to remove his hand or he wouldn't get a treat", Heritch continued visibly shaken, "but he just wouldn't stop".The incident forced Ms. Heritch to file a formal complain... More About: Listen
Old and The New
2007-06-07 01:11:00 As you may recall, last month I mentioned reading A Dirty Job by Christopher Moore, and said I would summarize my thoughts once I finished (here's the post if you need refreshing). However, don't expect a lengthy review, because frankly I'm not that objective - or qualified.I love this book!!!Did that come off too strong? I'm sure it did, but I feel it's warranted. This is the kind of book you just knew Moore could write about death. I had set the bar very high for this one, and it cleared the standard easily.The central message of the novel weaves through many of the major religions; coming to the ideal that we all must work and fight for our souls. We are also shown that some of the moments we take for granted in our lives are what make it worth living. Don't worry though, these themes are handled with the utmost care and never come off as heavy-handed.The characters are fleshed out and seem believable; not an easy feat when you consider you're reading about a secondhand st...
Having Fun with Scanography
2007-06-06 00:52:00 I was at the library yesterday, and I got to reading a photography magazine that featured a little blurb on scanography; basically scanning as an art form.I was intrigued by the concept of using a scanner as a camera and the problems that might arise. So, I walked around today and picked up various leaves and flowers to experiment with.The result was 1 piece that I think turned out really well and 1 that turned out decent; as for the rest, not so much. However, as with everything, trial and error is the name of the game. I can promise you will be seeing more attempts at this, because it is incredibly addictive.I will list a very brief outline of the steps I took, so that you can try it for yourself.1. Find an interesting object to scan. I suspect most scan flowers because there's so much depth in a small area. Look for something that won't crush easily; although, you could find interesting ways around that.2. Next, clean off the object you wish to scan. Don't worry about it too m... More About: Scan , Ving , Graph
Through the Looking Glass
2007-06-05 04:35:00 Upon re-reading my profile and seeing the words "taking pictures", I decided to post a few of my favorite personal photographs.I prefer skewing my photographs much like I do my hand-drawn art. Meaning, I use infrared techniques, mute the colors, use varying angles, or change the palette entirely; from time to time.All photos are taken with a Canon PowerShot A70. Nothing fancy, a point and shoot more than anything, but I always enjoyed using it. Although, it is on the fritz right now. Click on the images if you want larger versions.This first one is entitled "Tree Web". I took it a few months back during a walk in the woods, and I always enjoyed looking at it.These next two shots are examples of the infrared technique I mentioned. The first is called "Heritage", and the second is entitled "Confined."Finally, I'll put up a shot that uses almost all the techniques. It's a picture of a light bulb taken from inside a light box, and I called it "Power of Light."Maybe I'll put a tutoria... More About: Glass , Look , The Look , Through the Looking Glass
The 900 Theory
2007-06-05 03:48:00 So, I'm walking thorough the grocery store yesterday trying to buy some delicious treats, and I hear.Well I can stand beside ideals I think are right....Now, that may seem fairly normal; however, it was being blasted over the loudspeakers and is the beginning of a song I now loathe. John Mellencamp's "Our Country" was never a song I liked, and was something I could usually ignore. However, something about hearing it this time really pissed me off.I had, on estimate, heard this song 899 times. It was introduced last October during the last World Series, and through a combination of the ensuing football season and the beginning of this baseball season the play count really added up fast. I was fine with all of that until yesterday; when the 900th time was tallied and the loathing began.So, let me start by say-......From the east coast to the west coastdown the dixie highway back homethis is our countryWhat in the name of Wonder Woman's girdle was that?Anyway, I've deci-....Hi... More About: Theory , Theo
One Button to Rule Them All
2007-06-04 04:20:00 In an effort to lower clutter and yet still get my blog out there; I have placed an Add This! button to the end of my posts.It was easy to place on the Blogger template - something not easily found, and now I won't have 15 buttons filling up the bottom of my posts.Just thought I'd give you a heads up.Have a good night. More About: Button , Butt , Rule
Lacking Writing Material
2007-06-03 21:13:00 I've drawn something of a blank in regards to writing. I wouldn't go it a "block" per se, but no matter what you call it I have nothing to write about.Then a little voice inside my head told me, hey, this is an art blog; you could just draw something and post that.Well, after taking some medication to rid myself of said voice, I drew this. I call it "Artificial Sunshine."(click the image for larger version) More About: Writing , Material , Rial , Teri , Lack
Virb - What MySpace Could've Been
2007-06-02 20:31:00 This blog is simulcast on Virb; so, this isn't exactly news to those of you reading this from there. However, there are plenty of people that are still toiling with MySpace, and don't realize what they're missing.Now, I've only had a MySpace page for about a year or so, and while I've met some truly fantastic artists and writers through it, I never really enjoyed the experience. The presence of pre-teen-and teen for that matter, "lol" using, Dane Cook adoring web goers is inescapable. However, my main problem is that; oh, how can I put this? It's about as ugly of a web beast as is imaginable. My page is no different; it's bulky, slow loading, and generally unattractive. Even those pages with nice style are either sluggish or lacking of content.I have never used Facebook, but from what I here, it is perfectly fine for it's intent. However, as an artist it never really attracted me.Thankfully, I was reading over a blog, the name of which is escaping me, and found a great alter... More About: Myspace , Pace , Been
LogoPond - Identity Inspiration
2007-06-02 01:25:00 LogoPond is a site used to display your - you guessed it - logos. There are some really talented identity artists throughout the community, and you could spend a whole day just looking through their work. There are of course some really bad designs, but that goes with everything in the World, and it certainly isn't a hindrance.A place like this could be very sloppy, and become more of a headache then it's worth. However, they manage to make it sleek and simple to navigate, not a simple feat. Plus, the forums are informative, and seem to be picking up with activity everyday.Now, I don't really do this kind of work that often, in large part because I don't get hired to; so, I don't have much in the way of logos posted. However, I have learned a great deal about type ,kerning and placement in particular, through this site, and credit some of the success on some posters I did to this logotype community.So give it a look won't you, I think you'll find yourself addicted fairly quic... More About: Inspiration , Logo , Identity
Illustration Friday - "Your Paradise"
2007-06-01 20:15:00 As I'm sure I've mentioned somewhere before, I love trees. I think they're some of the best subjects to draw, photograph, etc.; thus, when the topic "your paradise" showed up it was a no-brainer. So, here's an illustration I did of me when I was a kid, when I would spend many afternoons sitting in the tree Forrest Gump-style. Enjoy.(click image for larger view)It was drawn in pencil, then inked, and finally colored in Photoshop. More About: Paradise , Friday , Illustration , Lust , Stra
International Blog of Mystery
2007-06-01 00:31:00 International?That's right, now this little blog of mine can be read in 9 other languages. Just click on the flags to the right, and you will be magically whisked away to a translated page of your linguistic choosing. This service is being provided by the all-powerful Google. All praise Google and it's amazing ability to monopoli...I mean, share the internet with so many people. (I'm a dead man)Blog of Mystery ?Well, it's not really a mystery that this blog provides the highest level of social and political commentary, while keeping low on filler and nonsensical jargon.Well, have a hoo-toppin' gibbet day. Tune in next time, when I write about the price of tube socks at the local haberdashery. More About: International , Al B , Intern
Finished Portrait..and Random Tidbits
2007-05-31 19:16:00 (click image for larger view)This is a portrait of Cate Blanchett I started a while ago, but never got around to finishing. I genuinely don't enjoy doing portraits but I hadn't done one in so long; I wanted to make sure I still could.................................... ......................................... ..Last.fm, a site that I just discovered not all that long ago, has been sold to CBS. Now, I'm not one to judge someone for selling their company, they made it they can do what they wish; however, as a fan of the service, I'm sure this spells the end.I'm sure it will be fine for a while, but slowly but surely CBS will make it an ad-filled wasteland, or something else entirely. I'll just put this in the "got into the site just a bit too late" pile..................................... ......................................... ..I was re-watching some Arrested Development episodes yesterday, and damn does that show rock.Afternoon Delight is a favorite of mine from Season 2, and... More About: Random , Tidbits , Portrait , Finish , TRAI
";" R.I.P (1587-2007)
2007-05-30 19:25:00 *note: the ";" seen throughout this story was portrayed in collaboration from "," and ".".The ";" was found dead early this morning outside a Nevada nightclub. Police issued a statement revealing that it was a homicide by what appears to be an arrow, and that they have two suspects in custody. (shown below)(computer rendering of the suspects working together)As we all know, the ";" was a created by combining the genetic materials of the "," and "." in 1587. The World's scholars were furious about this "bastardization" and refused to use it in their works; however, you can't keep a "super comma" down.It quickly gained popularity in Europe after it was featured in the poem "Dost Thou Buy Bagels?" by famed English playwright William Shakespeare on March 15, 1591. From there, the World was its' dictionary, but sadly what comes up, must fall.In the Spring of 1645, ";" binded two sentences that were clearly marked for a ",". It later came out that ";" had been out drinking with the par...
Tasty New Read
2007-05-27 21:38:00 I have loved Christopher Moore's novels ever since reading Lamb a few months back, and he is currently one of my favorite authors. Thus, I have been enjoying his latest (at least I believe it is), A Dirty Job. I've only just started it but I'm digging everything about it so far.It revolves around a man named Charlie Asher, a self-tagged Beta-Male, who finds out through unfortunate events that he is Death, or at least part of its' process.It's a concept that has been done numerous times, but when an author like Moore puts his spin on it, it becomes very intriguing. So keep a look out for it, and I'll try to keep you updated on how I like it.Have a great Memorial Day!!! More About: Read
I Have a Pencil Problem...or Do I?
2007-05-27 20:18:00 Now, upon reading that title some may feel that they don't want to know that information, and if you do, you will be disappointed.The fact is, I have far too many writing/drawing utensils in my home. I'm looking at a Green Bay Packers Mug as I type filled with a large variety of tree waste. You may be thinking to yourself, "hey, you should treasure those instruments of creativity; because there's a small child in Uganda using his/her toenail to make their art". Well first off, only a real asshole would bring up the toenail-art of Uganda as a negative, and secondly I simply can't take the flood of No. 2s anymore (snicker).I was recently going through my closet and found an old school supply case brimming with the little buggers. There were some from my elementary school days...elementary school. That means I have pencils old enough to have seen the relevance of Gallagher.While trying to order all of the pencils chronologically, I had an epiphany; maybe I'm collecting these penci... More About: Problem , Pencil
Pan's Labyrinth (dir: Guillermo del Toro)
2007-05-20 04:00:00 (click images for larger view)StarringAriadna GilIvana BaqueroSergi LopezMaribel VerduDoug JonesAlex AnguloRated R; Runtime: 119 minutesPlot overview: "Ofelia (Ivana Baquero) isn't just having a bad day, she's having a bad life. Her country is war-torn with the fascist government battling the rebel maquis. Her father has died, a victim of the fighting. Her mother (Ariadna Gil), alone and unprotected, was forced to marry the vicious Captain Vidal (Sergi Lopez) and conceive his child. She is now nearing full term but the pregnancy is killing her. The potential of being left alone in the world with Vidal is enough to turn Ofelia's blood to ice. One day, while exploring the terrain around her new rural home, she discovers an ancient labyrinth made out of huge slabs of rock. Within live creatures of myth: fairies and fauns. Ofelia learns an amazing thing: she is the long-lost princess, the daughter of the King of the Underworld. To prove her worthiness of this title, she must complete... More About: Del Toro , Guillermo del Toro , Labyrinth , Guillermo
Back to Basics
More articles from this author:2007-05-17 21:30:00 I was browsing over the site Mojizu.com and I came across this link in one of their blog entries. It's a Japanese site called Pose Maniacs, and it provides a place to practice speed-drawing the human form. Using a flash application you are given a series of poses to draw; you may select to have anywhere from 10 to 90 seconds before the next pose appears. Since they only provide you with the muscular form, you are able to deconstruct the subject more easily; allowing you to focus on the lines and structure. There's even an option to select more advanced poses to challenge those form experts out there.Hope you enjoy it, and have a good day. More About: Anatomy , Back , Illustration , Back To Basics , Basics 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 |
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