Resume Hell

RSS Feed Homepage

Articles: 1, 2

Product Expertise
2007-02-07 09:35:07
"McDonald?s Restaurant Ltd.2004 ? Present * Supervising Staff * Cashing up * Cashier * Customer Service ? selling stock * Managing the store-opening/closing up * Dealing with customers queries * Authorising refunds/exchanges * Acquiring knowledge of all new products"Hey Anna-Nicole ! Quit acquiring knowledge of new McDonald's products !
More About: Product , Expert , Prod , Pert

Doesn't that hurt ?
2007-02-04 09:33:04
"Eternally aspiring to conquer myself in everything I do and every elevation I gain"
More About: Hurt , Hat , That

So passionate
2007-01-31 21:31:04
"Interests :Although not an activity, traveling is another one of my passions."I can appreciate having a interest, which you do not partake in. Formula One, for example is difficult for most people to dabble in at the weekends.But how can you be passionate about travel that you don't do, and places you haven't been to ?
More About: Passion , Pass , Sion , Nate , Passi

Vast talents
2007-01-31 21:31:04
"Work Sought : Anything Busy and rewarding that employs my vast talents and rewards accordingly. Will take performance related as I'm good"You forgot to add "humble".Don't get me wrong, I love enthusiasm and pride in ones ability, but the term "my vast talents" rubs me the wrong way.
More About: Talents , Talent , Tale , Vast , Lent

Programming Royalty
2007-01-31 21:31:04
"Area of Interest I have craze of game programming because they are called the king of programmer I want to be the king"And he shall be crowned King Prog rammer, and all shall bow down before him proclaiming"Long live the King ! Java ! Java ! Java!"
More About: Programming , Royal , Program , Royalty

Give me the news, I gotta bad case of lovin' you.
2007-01-31 21:31:04
Received today - Dr Doctor.Yes, that's his name. He was Mr Doctor, and in July last year he completed his PhD in Computer Science making him Dr Doctor. I know I'm a simple person, but for me it doesn't get much better than that....I've just discovered that this is called Nominative DeterminismSo there you go, not just amusing we're now informative too.
More About: News , The N , The News , Case , Give

I'll just help him search.
2007-01-31 21:31:04
"I worked with Mr Imran Khan (Former Pakistan cricket player) in his campaign for cancer." A campaign for cancer research, A campaign for cancer awareness, A campaign for cancer care. These are all options, but I'm guessing the fast-bowling lothario wasn't involved in Equal Rights for Carcinogens. I'm pretty sure the Imran Khan Foundation is against it.
More About: Search , Just , Help

Dynamic individual
2007-01-31 21:31:04
"interests and hobbiesnone at present"None ? At present ? huh ?Perhaps it used to read "Interests and hobbies - sitting", but he couldn't take the pace of such an arduous activity.
More About: Individual , Dynamic , Dual , Nami

Much use ?
2007-01-31 21:31:04
"Monster CV Headline : 1 year old French Marketing Executive in the UK"Probably as much use as most marketing people.
More About: Much

I'm great. I think.
2007-01-31 21:31:04
"I have a wide variety of skills and experience, some of which I have taken for granted and cannot readily recall.If considered for employment, I believe I will be an asset to your reputable organisation."I will be an asset, but please remind me what my job is every morning.
More About: Great , Think

Not one of mine - but too good not to include
2007-01-31 21:31:04
Guy applies for Web Design job in Dubai Here's the abbreviated version From: Amir Saffar To: Mike Platts Sent: Friday, December 15, 2006 9:11 PM Subject: RE: hi again it?s very simple Mike. You are interested in my profile and i wanted to know how much you were able to pay. no response means: you either can?t pay that much, or you only hire indians and pakistanis who don?t ask for a good salary. but dude, i am neither indian or paki and i have never worked for less than 2000 usd/month. You got it now!? Amir
More About: Mine , Good

You don't agree with me ? Here - drink this.
2007-01-31 21:31:04
"1999-2000 Israel Center for Negotiation and Medication"Happy New Year to you all !We start 2007 with another great example of how a simple typo (one single additional letter !) can change a context. I'm pretty sure he meant the Israel Center for Negotiation and Mediation but perhaps effective use of Rohypnol is also a good sales technique.
More About: Drink , With , This , Here

Unfair extrapolation
2007-01-31 21:31:04
"InterestsKaraoke - I thrive on the confidence that karaoke gives me"This sentence just screams to me "I am shy and pathetic in real life, but alcohol and a microphone makes me loud and aggressive". I know this is drastically unfair but these ideas pop into my head and I write them down, kind of like tourettes blogging.
More About: Fair , Extra , Unfair , Trap , Xtra

Don't embed a photo - FOLLOW UP !
2007-01-31 21:31:04
So, I had my suspicions about "Don't embed a photo" too (see the post 3 down - 28th Nov), so I replied.I indicated that I couldn't understand why he would send me the picture as shown and perhaps it was a mistake. Here's the (unedited) reply ;"the truth is that the recruiters in the UK are as lameas the ones in AmeriKa ... when i find a jobadvertisement that i am qualified for, that has arecruiter that is so pompous that he or she can't seetheir shoes without standing in front of a mirror ...who obviously is not going the give me the time of day... i send them a copy of my 'resume' ... the factsare correct and excessively understated so as not tofrighten the recruiter or the employer ... employersdo not want anyone smarter or mor experienced aroundbecause they are afraid the might look bad ...congradulations !!! you are the first person ever torecognize the photograph ... and you have to be over50 because the 20 somethings do not have a clue .."Needless to say, I shall be endi...
More About: Photo

You do what ??
2007-01-31 21:31:04
"HobbiesI enjoy cooking Chinese and Italians"Tastes like chicken apparently.
More About: What , Hat

Questionable Hobbies
2007-01-31 21:31:04
"Hobbies Playing with Boy scouts"Thanks to Louise at UKrecruiter for this one.Remember folks - engage brain into first gear before accelerating typing fingers !
More About: Question , Quest

CV Headline: I came from the futire
2007-01-31 21:31:04
"About Me:Strangely it may seem, but I've noticed that what I am doing today, others do couple years after.Instead of being a follower I prefer to be a leader. I never fail to do what I believe is right and I don?t care what other people think about me. Not a good sign but again, I se a term of 'being successful' as making it despite all adversity, rather than making it by using other people's weaknesses. No wonder, I have no money, but again, although being "loaded" is commonly used as a measure of being successful, this does not apply to my view and it is not a true measure of "success". Personally I'd rather be a poor free man, rather that rich slave.Apart from having a Can Do attitude, which means that I'd rather have a go on doing something, rather than talking about it, I am also easily bored so I prefer chaotic environment, no wonder admin is not quite my cup of tea.I guess I prefer to work with people that can inspire me, both creatively and spiritually (although I am ...
More About: Head , Line , Headline , Tire