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Ballistic: Ecks Vs Sever - Dir: Kaos
2007-08-24 07:23:00
Another blast from the past today saving you the precious time you have to spare. This may be a film that creeps up on TV and you think 'Lucy Liu and Antonio Banderas in an action movie? This can't be bad!' Please avoid at all costs. This may be one of the worst action movies of all time. Directed by someone who had previously directed the biggest film in Thailand , they should have probably not taken that as a good thing. Also stars Ray Park who played Darth Maul, as an English bad guy. He is bad for sure. One of the worst acting performances ever. This is a JM THUMBS DOWN.
More About: Kaos , Ballistic

X Men 3 - Dir: Brett Ratner
2007-08-23 08:39:00
Pretty much everything an action movie shouldn't be. The problem with the X-men movies is that there are too many characters to keep tabs on and never enough time to give them any character development. Hugh Jackman , Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellen, Halle Berry and Famke Janssen reprise their roles in the movie and are joined by Vinnie Jones as the Juggarnaut. As you'd expect, he doesn't exactly act the legs off anyone else in the movie. A flawed script combined with paint by numbers directing by Brett Ratner really leaves a shallow taste. This is a JM THUMBS DOWN.
More About: X-Men

Proof - Dir: John Madden
2007-08-22 07:45:00
What was good on paper turns in to watching paint dry on screen. The director John Madden has pedigree being nominated for an Oscar for Shakespeare in Love. The heavyweight cast of Gwyneth Paltrow, Jake Gyllenhaal and Anthony Hopkins should have oozed greatness, but none apart from Paltrow have the material to get their teeth in to. The story about a woman's relationship with her dead mathematical genius father is adapted from a successful stage show and you can tell here through the wooden feel of it all, which is a shame. This is a JM THUMBS DOWN.
More About: Proof , John Madden

Dreamgirls - Dir: Bill Condon
2007-08-21 09:50:00
There have been so many unmusical musicals over the last couple of decades that you might think that this is another in the long line. However, not only is it a fabulous musical, it also has some great performances. Indeed it is hard to find a weak link amongst the cast. Of particularly note are Eddie Murphy who may have done his best ever acting job albeit comparatively brief and Beyonce Knowles who has succesfully moved from singer to fully-fledged actress in this role. Star of the show, or at least the one with the best voice is Jennifer Hudson , who was previously a non-winning contestant on American Idol. Well directed by Bill Condon and some great production design by John Myhre. This is a JM RECOMMENDS.
More About: Dreamgirls , Musical

Apocalypto - Dir: Mel Gibson
2007-08-20 11:04:00
Mel Gibson has to be applauded for making a film with no spoken English, no known actors and about a culture that certainly isn't mainstream movie fodder. He remarkably pulls off the film in every respect. It's very absorbing and pacy, but can also be a painful watch due to some very heavy eye jarring violence. The story about the Mayan decline and their attempt to bring propsperity through the sacrifice of local indigenous tribes is fresh and very interesting subject matter. This is definitely a JM RECOMMENDS.
More About: Mel Gibson , Apocalypto

Man on Fire - Dir: Tony Scott
2007-08-17 11:30:00
A classic re-visit today for a film you may have missed. This 2004 film is actually a remake of a 1987 film and for once is a remake that was justified. Denzel Washington stars as the alcoholic bodyguard on a mission to track down a kidnapped child in Mexico. He is phenomonal as always and it is a crime to think he didn't get nominated for any Oscars that year especially when up against the likes of Johnny Depp (Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl) and Jude Law (Cold Mountain). Tony Scott's MTV style direction works well here unlike some of his other movies. This is very much a JM RECOMMENDS.
More About: Fire , Pirates of the Carribean

Monster House - Dir: Gil Kenan
2007-08-16 11:04:00
Was really looking forward to this, but it ended up being a different movie to the one I had expected. I had expected it to be a kids get trapped in a haunted house type scenario, but here the house literally is a monster! I did find the art style a bit hard to enjoy, it's CGI that has a sort of plasticine touch to it. Voices from Steve Buscemi , Jon Heder and Maggie Gyllenhall fit well, but the one big surprise was the lack of 'fun' in the script, as there were very few belly laughs. If you go in to expecting a traditional kids adventure movie and not a comedy you will get more out of it it. Watchable, but not as good as expected, this is a JM SUCK IT AND SEE.
More About: House , Maggie Gyllenhaal , Monster , Monster House

Hollywoodland - Dir: Allen Coulter
2007-08-15 11:03:00
An interesting movie about the mysterious death of the first Superman George Reeves, played by Ben Affleck . Affleck does little to prove to me his limitations as an actor, but here does just enough to pull off an acceptable performance. Adrien Brophy is the private investigator looking in to his death and in comparison shows what a very good actor he is. Support from Diane Lane as Affleck's on screen lover is also excellent. Directed well by Allen Coulter and captures the seediness and feeling of Hollywood during this period well. Some nice twists and turns. This is a JM RECOMMENDS.
More About: Hollywoodland , Olly

Eragon - Dir: Stefan Fangmeier
2007-08-14 11:00:00
Very disappointing really and ultimately very Lord of the Rings -lite. There is a host of terrible acting including Robert Carlyle and John Malkovich who are unexpectedly hammy. Consummate professional Jeremy Irons tries as much as possible with the lines he has been given. Edward Speelers plays the eponymous Eragon and is verging on the side of irritating. The special effects are ropey in places. If you feel you must watch this, fast forward to the last 20 minutes, where the big dragon battle takes place. This is a JM THUMBS DOWN.
More About: Red Dragon , Fang

Transformers - Dir: Michael Bay
2007-08-13 11:05:00
Wow is an understatement. This may well be one of the best action movies ever. We know director Michael Bay can do action but he really does up the bar here. Even more impressive are the special effects i.e the transformers themselves, whicb are so good you start to believe they are real. The two leads Shia LaBeouf and Megan Fox fit nicely in to everything around them. A nice script penned by the Alias TV show favourites Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman. It's got a long runnning time and there is a very tiny sag in the middle, but the action finale more than makes up for it. This is a JM RECOMMENDS.
More About: Transformers , Michael Bay

Silent Hill - Dir: Christophe Gans
2007-08-10 11:01:00
I was looking forward to this - great subject matter and a director (Christophe Gans) who had done some interesting stuff previously including Crying Freeman and Brotherhood of the Wolf. Visually this film is very reminiscent of the game, bleak and washed out. The story however is completely messed up and doesn't really flow. Disappointing again because it was written by Roger Avary , whose work on Killing Zoe, Pulp Fiction and Rules of Attraction I admired. It's also not as scary as I was expecting, which is pretty much a killer for a horror thriller flick. Sean Bean is ok but it's not really the sort of material he works with best. This is a JM THUMBS DOWN.
More About: Silent , Hill , Silent Hill , Lent

Clerks 2 - Dir: Kevin Smith
2007-08-09 10:58:00
I have to admit that I wasn't a great fan of the first one and didn't rush to see this one. The first one had it's moments but it was a bit too cheap and rough for my liking. The sequel however is an absolute joy. Supremely funny and very well written and acted, it meshes the absolute gross with some pretty honest relationship stuff. Highlights include a scene with a donkey (you'll know what I mean when you see it!) and a brilliant Silence of the Lambs pastiche! This is a JM RECOMMENDS.
More About: Kevin Smith , Clerks , Smith , Clerks 2 , Kevin

The Grudge 2 - Dir: Takashi Shimizu
2007-08-08 12:30:00
This is a real shame. The sequel to the Sarah Michelle Gellar scare fest is just a tired re-tread really. On the plus side it does have a feint Japanese feel to it, is very vaguely watchable and the director Takashi Shimizu (director of the first movie and the original Japanese versions) doesn't westernise it too much. However the acting is pretty average, the scares are a bit repetitive and the twists are signposted 500 miles from home. Probably best just to watch the Japanese original sequel. This is a JM THUMBS DOWN.
More About: The Grudge , Kashi , Grudge , The G

The Tudors
2007-08-07 11:20:00
Starring Jonathan Rhys Meyers and support from Sam Neill, this Showtime mini series tries to do for The Tudors what Rome did for the Romans. Unfortunately it is unable to match it, but gives it a good go. It has a good level of historical recreation, an interesting story and an amount of violence and nudity, but falls down in two places. The casting of nice boy and average actor JRM as Henry VIII is totally wrong, it should be someone that is able to command the screen and a bit more rugged. Also the screenplay is a lot drier than Rome, a programme that was able to weave the disturbing with the joviality of life at the time. If you're interested in the period it may be for you and thus is a JM SUCK IT AND SEE.

The SImpsons Movie - Dir: David Silverman
2007-08-06 11:41:00
Probably one of the most highly anticipated movies of recent times. It could be argued that this fact saddled the movie with a lot more than it could ever possibly handle. Don't get me wrong - it's good in places and incredibly funny in others although admittedly you've probably seen a lot of this in the trailer already. It's definitely not funnier than the funniest Simpsons episodes, and also contains no monkeys with knives. It's still better than 90% of comedies out this year but slightly disappointing nonetheless. This is a JM SUCK IT AND SEE.
More About: Movie , Matt Groening , The Simpsons , David

Poseidon - Dir: Wolfgang Petersen
2007-08-03 11:38:00
If anyone can pull off a big sea event movie you would think it was director Wolf gang Petersen after his successes with Perfect Storm and Das Boot . Ultimately however it ends up as one of those 'why did they bother?' movies. Let's face it, the 1972 version of this disaster movie was a classic. For sure, in 2007 we can bring a bundle of new special effects to the table and indeed the big wave scene that flips Posiedon over is pretty cool. Unfortunately the acting, script and general ambience that goes with it is pretty poor. Stars Kurt Russell. This is a JM THUMBS DOWN.
More About: Pose , Wolfgang

A Night At The Museum - Dir: Shawn Levy
2007-08-02 10:59:00
I'm a big fan of Ben Stiller and was quite looking forward to this film. Ricky Gervais, Steve Coogan, Robin Williams and Owen Wilson are also in it. Could this be the funniest film ever? Not really unfortunately. It does have its moments but pretty much all the comedians listed are underwhelming in one way or another. Ricky Gervais is pretty much David Brent without the suit on and doesn't fit in. Robin Williams doesn't really do any of the quick witted wise cracks that he's known for. The special effects are also billed as the star of the show, but honestly are a bit shoddy in places. The script is very very lightweight. Worth a watch but this is only a JM SUCK IT AND SEE.
More About: Night , Museum

Scanner Darkly - Dir: Richard Linklater
2007-08-01 11:16:00
This was disappointing considering it was from Richard Linklater, director of one of my fave films Before Sunrise. It was doubly disappointing in that it is a story derived from the portfolio of famed sci-fi writer Phillip K Dick whose stories also include Total Recall and Blade Runner . The movie is presented in a sort of live animation that looks like real footage that has been colourised, in a process called rotoscoping. It looks really neat for the first five minutes and then becomes irritating beyond belief. It makes it difficult to follow a story that you really need to keep tabs on. Stars Keanu Reeves , Winona Ryder , Woody Harrelson and Robert Downey Jr . This is a JM THUMBS DOWN.

Texas Chainsaw Massacre Beginning - Dir: Jonathan Liebesman
2007-07-31 11:45:00
The plot is essentially the same old youngsters get stranded at a creepy old house and then get tortured to death. The difference here is that you get to find a little bit more about how leatherface came to be and how the chainsaw became to be his weapon of choice. To be fair, in this film this guy uses anything sharp to bring his victims to a grisly end. It's no wonder he turned out the way he did raised by a family of freaks who think of nothing about in breeding and eating human flesh when animal meat runs out. Quite shocking in places, and perhaps a bit too much in places, but this is after all a horror movie. In your face grisliness means that this is worth a watch only if you can stomach it - this is a JM SUCK IT AND SEE.
More About: Texas , Jonathan , Massacre , Chainsaw , Chain

Collateral Damage - Dir: Andrew Davis
2007-07-30 12:17:00
Big Arnie teams up with consummate action director Andrew Davi d (Under Siege/The Fugitive) in something a bit more gritty and realistic than his old full on blow stuff up movies. A terrorist bomb kills his wife and kid, and Arnie decides to go on a one man crusade to track the killer down. Actually this does sound like all of his other movies! Underrated at the time, certainly by me, a recent re-viewing showing shows that this movie actually holds up pretty well. It's not the best film Arnie has ever done, but certainly still a cut above a lot of the action movies out since. This is a JM RECOMMENDS.
More About: Davis , Collateral Damage , Tera

Manhunter - Dir: Michael Mann
2007-07-27 12:19:00
In my journey to revisit all the past Hannibal Lecter movies, it would be imcomplete without re-viewing this title. Before Hopkins came along, Brian Cox had given a seriously understated and creepy performance as Lecter. Based on the Red Dragon book, this film is often regarded as pretty good, but how well does it stand up now? The answer is pretty good. There is no denying the 80s synth soundtrack really chafes, but Mann 's evidence of being a good director shines through even back then. Good performances all round. Stick with it. This is a JM RECOMMENDS.
More About: Michael , Michael Mann , Hunt

Starter For Ten - Dir:Tom Vaughan
2007-07-26 11:18:00
One of those UK movies that you might easily overlook and lump in to the low budget UK rubbish movie category. You would be totally wrong to do that. This really is a little gem. A coming of age story intertwined with a dream to appear on University Challenge. Stars James McAvoy who really is very good and the recent hype about his various recent roles is justified. Mark Gatiss (from League of Gentlemen) is brilliant as Bamber Gascoigne. Funny, warming and very watchable, with a great 80s soundtrack. This is a JM RECOMMENDS.
More About: Vaughan , Ghan , Starter

Underworld Evolution - Dir: Len Wiseman
2007-07-25 11:14:00
This is the sequel to the werewolves versus dracula battle fest starring Kate Beckinsale . There's no denying that she looks good in a skin tight PVC cat suit but really that's the only straightforward thing in this movie. For the first hour at least you are wondering what is going on, the story is so complicated. The director has recently completed Die Hard 4.0 which was an action fest and although this movie has it's moments, it is so dark on screen it's hard to appreciate them. Ultimately pretty average. This is a JM THUMBS DOWN.
More About: Evolution , Underworld , Under , Len Wiseman

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix - Dir: David Yates
2007-07-24 11:46:00
If you ask people what they thought of this movie, they would probably reply in the positive. Listen to me, this is a very average movie. Four/fifths of it is school politics which is oh so dull and the last fifth is pretty much the same as all the others. It certainly doesn't have the magic and charm of the earlier books, and is nowhere as good as the last movie in the series, which in my opinion was the best. The acting is mostly terrible apart from Ron, Harry and Hermione. In particular the Weasley Twins and Seamus are beyond terrible. Direction was also pretty average. This is a JM THUMBS DOWN.
More About: Phoenix , Harry Potter , Order of the Phoenix , Potter , David

Dexter
2007-07-17 13:14:00
This American TV show was shown over there quite some months ago. I raved at the time to anybody who would listen that they must catch this show. Bizarrely when I first saw a trailer for the show I thought it look dreadul, but thankfully I was very very wrong. Finally it is landing on these shores. Michael C Hall from Six Feet Under fame plays the eponymous Dexter who is a serial killer with a twist...he only kills bad people...and is a cop! Some nice twists and turns along the way and some great characters make this a definite JM RECOMMENDS.

All The King's Men - Dir: Steven Zaillian
2007-07-16 11:18:00
This remake of a classic 1949 movie should be amazing. An accomplished writer and an amazing cast including Sean Penn , Kate Winslet , Jude Law , Anthony Hopkins and James Gandolfini . Surprisingly it all ends up being blander than bland and leaves you with a vaguely pointless feeling. Sean Penn is always great to watch but there's a sense of not knowing really what he's trying to accomplish. It's hard to get away from seeing Gandolfini as Tony Soprano and Hopkins as Lecter in moments of boredom. It looks beautiful and the direction is solid enough, but it all ultimately feels as if it leads to nowhere. This is a JM THUMBS DOWN.
More About: Sopranos

Flushed Away - Dir: David Bowers / Sam Fell
2007-07-13 15:06:00
With an Aardman movie, a good level of quality is assured. You can always guarantee great attention to detail, great visuals and a pacy story. You certainly get a great deal of that here, but something seems to be missing which may just be the the final layer of Aardman fairy dust that has been sprinked on some of their other fun movies. Hugh Jackman and Kate Winslet certainly add star power but perhaps aren't the most recognisable of voices. Maybe it's just because the movie centres around rats that it felt less heart-warming. A cut above many animated movies out there, and one for Aardman fans, but don't expect too much. This is a JM SUCK IT AND SEE.
More About: David , Flushed Away , Davi

Hannibal - Dir: Ridley Scott
2007-07-12 16:07:00
After revisting Silence of the Lambs, I decided to revisit this sequel. On paper, it has everything going for it, including thr return of Anthony Hopkins , a script by David Mamet and the arrival of heavyweight director Ridley Scott . In the same way that Hopkins is irreplaceable, is soon transpires that Foster is too. In this movie, the role of Clarence Starling is played by Julianne Moore , and although a pedigree actress, she never really hits the mark that Foster did. The script changes the book plot for the worse, and never really captures the menace of the previous film. Disappointing but worth it just to see Hopkins reprising his role as Lecter. This is a JM SUCK IT AND SEE.
More About: Jodie Foster

Hostel 2 - Dir: Eli Roth
2007-07-11 11:55:00
This backpacking Quentin Tarantino produced gore fest is back and has more than a few twists along the way. First up, it is a group of girls that get lured to the infamous hostel for some shaken, stirred and slashed frolics. Secondly we get to find out what happened to the protagonist from the first movie. Thirdly, we get to see the thrills and spills from the viewpoint of two of the people that bid to be a killer. As you would expect it is really gruesome, but perhaps not as much volume as the previous one, and some gratuitous nudity. The ending seemed slightly rushed but you'll know if this is your cup of tea already. This is a JM SUCK IT AND SEE.
More About: Al Gore , Blood , Hostel , Eli Roth

All the President's Men - Dir: Alan J Pakula
2007-07-10 15:29:00
This 1976 movie hooked up the two legends of Redford and Hoffman in this replay of the story of the lowly journalists that uncovered the Watergate affair and brought down Nixon. For a movie that centres around a lot of talking and investigating, it is incredibly absorbing. In part this is because of the great script written by the real journalists involved, but also because of the great on screen charisma of the leading actors. There certainly are very few people in Hollywood today that can hold a screen like these two in their hey-day. It's a classic film, that won 4 Oscar s and was nominated for 20, but unfortunately is pretty long and won't be everyone's cup of tea. It's a JM SUCK IT AND SEE.
More About: Dustin Hoffman , Alan , The President , Resident