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Television! You Black EmperorTelevision! You Black EmperorDiscourse TV with pathological indie credibility.
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2007: Ten Hours
2008-01-01 23:25:00 First a desultory top 10 8 albums of the year, though with a nota bene: I don't think I've been this disinterested in putting together a year-end list in recent memory. That doesn't have anything to do with the quality of the year's releases; rather, my media priorities and critical attention have shifted unequivocally towards teevee, and I haven't felt the urge to keep up my indie cred as years More About: Hours
Project Runway - 4x05 "What's the Skinny?"
2007-12-29 21:38:00 Dear season 4, You have been so unremarkable that Tim Gunn injured himself when he recently overstrained himself while pulling the most troubled face over concerns about your lackluster performance thus far... ... from which he has been recovering, thereby explaining our current 3-week hiatus. The designers themselves are likewise troubled: Well, Elisa sees the world with different More About: Project Runway , Runway , Project , Skinny
America's Next Top Model (Cycle 9) - 9x13 "The Girl Who Becomes America's N
2007-12-18 05:56:00 Apparently, I had encoded spoilers for the winner of ANTM way back in the third episode -- check it out, first on Google! I don't want to talk at length about the finale or its results beyond Tyra's insipid pop-psychology, which was more insipid and reductive than usual. Not that she has ever shown much command of they dynamics of personal growth that doesn't involve a brown one-piece, but More About: Next Top Model , Top Model , Cycle , Model , Girl
Project Runway - 4x04 "Trendsetter"
2007-12-13 06:46:00 Sorry about missing the previous episode, last week was Hell in a handbasket. Anyway, if you came out my SYTYCD tour pics still thinking that I'm "cool," then you should know that the first thing I thought of when I saw Elisa's second-day outfit (below)... ... was "I've got to Photoshop in a huge gun and a zombie!" You see, once I do, the result... ... is virtually indistinguishable from More About: Project Runway , Runway , Project
America's Next Top Model (Cycle 9)
2007-12-12 22:36:00 tehresa, this one's for you. My erotic longing for Jenah's teeth, explained: (Actually, it's for me, but I guess that's TMI.) Indie rating: Cocteau Twins - "Tishbite" More About: Next Top Model , Top Model , Cycle , Model
Friday Night Lights - 2x08 "Seeing Other People"
2007-12-04 22:52:00 I've been thinking about this idea for a while, but that last episode kind of cemented it: Friday Night Lights has become what Studio 60 could've been, a show whose characters are elevated to a mediated with only a token resemblance to the quotidian. The first season was full of "accidental" hyper-naturalism, where its characters, both teen-aged and adult and cut from recognizable archetypes, More About: People , Friday Night Lights
So You Think You Can Dance - Tour Performance at San Jose's HP Pavilion 200
2007-12-01 23:19:00 My review of the San Jose show is separated into two parts, the performances and the meet-and-greet, for which I have to thank Lisa who not only hooked me up with a pass, but also introduced me to the dancers. Yes, I got into the meet and greet. It helps if you write an awesome blog that impresses someone with connections. (Frankly, I hope one day to write such a blog.) Also, all the action More About: Performance , Dance , Tour , So You Think You Can Dance , Pavilion
Project Runway - 4x02 "I Started Crying"
2007-11-28 21:57:00 Being an oddity attracts considerable attention of all kinds, both negative and positive, though thinking of her as odd frames her into the wrong question, because fundamentally, I don't find her that crazy or even inscrutably weird in any real-world terms. For one, she is too lucidly aware of the environment and contestants surrounding her and knows how to connect with them. But if you remain More About: Project Runway , Runway , Project , Crying
America's Next Top Model (Cycle 9) - 9x09 "The Girl Who Starts to Lose Her
2007-11-20 05:03:00 I'm completely tapped out on Top Model . I tried banging out a post on the last episode, but I really had nothing to say aside from some slash fic. Oh boy oh boy, ANTM slash! Perhaps it was three weeks overdue, but Ambreal finally was sent home, though I can't say that she ever did anything for me. On the other hand, that's probably because I never got under the covers with her, as Jenah seemed More About: Next Top Model , Cycle , Girl
Heroes - 2x08 "Four Months Ago"
2007-11-19 07:18:00 With the WGA strike threatening to wipe out the second half of this season, you might be thinking just how to amuse yourself during the interim. I'm here to tell you that you can think no more! Below is the story that the network did not want you to see! Read at your own peril! BROTHERLY LOVE: THE TRUE STORY OF NATHAN AND PETER PETRELLI A Story in 13 Panels Indie More About: Heroes , Months , Mont
Project Runway - 4x01 "Sew Us What You Got"
2007-11-18 03:10:00 THE TRUE SECRET TRUTH OF PROJECT RUNWAY Like Nina Garcia, I'm not sure what to think about the fourth-season premiere of Project Runway . I could complain that the lack of wow from the designers translated into a lack of wow for the premiere (I was less impressed with the pieces than the judges were -- I certainly couldn't imagine wearing any of them), a dudness of which is completely
Bones - 3x07 "The Boy in the Time Capsule"
2007-11-15 01:30:00 When Vladimir Nabokov fled Russia for western Europe and later the US, one of the ways he supported himself was to write chess problems, of which he held a decidedly idiosyncratic procedural view. His chess problems were contrived to have elaborately convoluted solutions, but if you hated fun, they could also be solved through blandly pedestrian moves. The pleasure of his puzzles didn't come from More About: Time , Bones , The Time , Time Capsule
America's Next Top Model (Cycle 9) - 9x08 "The Girls Who Crawl"
2007-11-12 03:13:00 In a twisted, inverted, perverted, blasphemed, desecrated, depraved form of the Paris Hilton Principle (i.e. famous for being famous), "The Girls Who Crawl" instantly became memorable for being the most unmemorable episode in Top Model history. Nothing of lasting interest happened. Tyra's video modeling teach was excruciating for every one of its five minutes (I'm not enticed by wannabe More About: Next Top Model , Cycle
America's Next Top Model (Cycle 9) - 9x07 "The Girl Who Runs Into The Glass
2007-11-05 03:00:00 In a very special episode of America's Next Top Model : It's the new sensation sweeping the Top Model house in this episode, swingin' out to '70s disco classics! These aren't just skinny girls who stand in front of cameras, they ain't closet disco queens -- they got inner divas that are burning to groove out! Chantal and Bianca don't just get down, they're croonin'... and slow More About: Cycle , Girl
Bones - 3x05 "Mummy in the Maze"
2007-11-03 01:38:00 Tuesday night at 8 PM was rather a notable occasion for the Bay Area -- a Halloween-themed episode of Bones that promised Emily Deschanel dressed up as Wonder Woman, which should be more than enough to entice anyone to watch the show, you ask me. But leaving aside the eye candy, Bones is above all a crime procedural whose meat and potatoes isn't the crime and its resolution and instead is the More About: Mummy , Maze
America's Next Top Model (Cycle 9) - 9x06 "The Girl Who Gets A Mango"
2007-10-31 00:45:00 Normally, Tyra, she of the big weave and fat ass big heart, lets an eliminee say a parting piece as a reality epitaph that's gently circumscribed by the ethical parameters of the competition: I still want to pursue what I was pursuing on the show, except I'm going to work harder; I'm going to miss the other girls; etc. However, Tyra may have overplayed her hand when, on top of giving Ebony her More About: Next Top Model , Mango , Top Model , Cycle , Model
America's Next Top Model (Cycle 9) - 9x05 "The Girl Who Is Scared Of Height
2007-10-24 07:53:00 Is the show proving true my prediction that the villain of this series will be everyone? During the semifinals, Ebony was the obvious villain, but she initially wilted under the judges' critiques; then Bianca valiantly took over as the villain du cycle, but she's chilled to a small degree ever since her weave was shaved off; now, we've got a small gang of girls (which apparently includes Bianca, More About: Next Top Model , Top Model , Cycle , Model , Girl
Heroes - 2x04 "The Kindness of Strangers"
2007-10-21 21:47:00 A Defense of a Show's Shoddy (Re)Beginning At its core, Heroes is a fringe cult-show that somehow became a monster hit, but now that the show is slow out of the starting gate, the citizens (that's what us nerds call the lot of you) are jumping off the bandwagon with righteous ire and lamenting the lost halcyon first season and its impeccable thrills. But now I bring nothing less than Promethean More About: Kindness , Kindness of Strangers , Tran , Strangers
Friday Night Lights - 2x03 "Are You Ready for Friday Night?"
2007-10-20 20:46:00 In a season that began with a questionable storyline, this episode is the most frustrating installment yet even though four-fifths of it was solid. "Are You Ready for Friday Night ?" featured what made Friday Night Lights so captivating last season, but to borrow football terminology, it was too busy running laterally or even backwards -- a desperate gambit without faith in the discipline that led
Heroes - 2x03 "Kindred"
2007-10-15 19:17:00 Just a brief prognosticatory note: Hiro and Kensei are going to become enemies over Yaeko; Kensei bears a grudge for almost 440 years until the our favorite ("favorite") supers, now without a Hiro in the bunch, are vulnerable to getting killed! Indie rating: Stereolab – Animal or Vegetable (A Wonderful Wooden Reason) More About: Heroes
America's Next Top Model (Cycle 9) - 9x04 "The Girl Who Goes Bald"
2007-10-15 18:35:00 Tyra said that Victoria was eliminated because of her abrasiveness and snappiness, but we all know that the real reason was because she was clueless about the reality and fashion games. Without the insaneness or the hysteria, Victoria had to bank on an overflow of charm (here, Nigel was right in a stopped-clock kind of way) to become a favorite on either the show or the competition. As with More About: Next Top Model , Top Model , Cycle , Model , Girl
Colleen - "I'll Read You a Story"
2007-10-12 03:30:00 On Tuesday (October 9), I took a break from my usual pop depravity to instead indulged my inner snob with a concert at an actual sit-down theatre (note English spelling!). While Beirut and their raucous gypsy punk stylings headlined, Colleen was for me the real attraction, and she was just short of sublime, as by my count she played only four songs. For those of you who aren't familiar with her More About: Story , Read
America's Next Top Model (Cycle 9) - 9x03 "The Girls Go Rock Climbing"
2007-10-09 21:31:00 Seeing how easily Ebony's front was shattered by the judges' critiques, I have to revise one of my old assumptions that Tyra loves to break down contestants only to rebuild them in her own image. If anything, Ebony has shown me that these girls have already been busted down fiercely, which they merely try to hide behind fierceness or bad weaves as they seek validation for their looks. True, we More About: Next Top Model , Girls , Top Model , Rock , Cycle
Heroes - 2x02 "Lizards"
2007-10-09 01:55:00 I've written about the loose narrativeness of Heroes before (which was an apologia for the sputtering climax of the finale), but I like to repeat myself (especially when I don't have much new to say), and moreover, I think I'm justified in revisiting and refining what I observed in "How to Stop an Exploding Man" by this young season so far. The upshot: Heroes is as purely about the moment as a More About: Lizards
Survivor: China - 15x03 "I Lost Two Hands and Possibly a Shoulder!"
2007-10-07 05:22:00 Either the writers on Survivor are still on the WGA strike, or they're erratically incompetent because of how wildly they characterize and re-characterize the players this year. Take for instance, John Hu, whom I'd didn't so much leave for dead but crowned the most dysfunctional tribe in Survivor History™. The episode seemed to start off business as usual, with raging murder in Dave's heart/eyes. More About: Lost , China , Hands
Great Mofo Delurk 2007
2007-10-03 20:24:00 I don't mind stealing a deucedly good idea, and the pertinent idea being that I have a handful of readers remaining from the post-SYTYCD malaise, most of whom lurk, I gather. So, in keeping with the spiritual zeitgeist of our times, unsheathe yourselves! Pray tell the following! How did you stumble upon the most indie TV blog in the universe (a title which, like American Jumpstyle Champion More About: Great
Survivor: China - 15x02 "My Mom Is Going to Kill Me!"
2007-10-03 03:26:00 Or, I Was Given the Clue for the Hidden Immunity Idol Because God Loves Me -Leslie Or, I Gave Leslie the Clue for the Hidden Immunity Idol Because She's the Weakest Link -Jaime And with that, Jaime became one of my immediate favorite contestants. In fact, when she decided to give Leslie the clue to the HII, Jaime set off another ripple that looks ripe with potential fireworks. After getting the More About: China , Survivor , Kill , Going , Goin
America's Next Top Model (Cycle 9) - 9x02 "The Girls Go Green"
2007-10-01 06:31:00 A biofuel limo-bus? A ban on smoking? Has Tyra developed a social conscience, and what's more, taken up my pet causes? No way to say for certain unless she mandates tandem showering/bathing to conserve water and declares an end to the War on Drugs or addressing the root cause of most social ills (poverty) rather than its symptoms (crime, drugs, etc.). But getting back to things that have a chance More About: Next Top Model , Girls , Top Model , Cycle , Green
Reaper - 1x01 "Pilot"
2007-09-27 18:28:00 I've seen how this all ends. Don't worry, God wins. -The Devil As we all know, I'm never wrong, so I can say in full confidence that judging solely by its premiere episode, Reaper is the best new show of the year, and might at some point become simply the best show not named The Wire (depending also on how FNL deals with a certain story arc, if Heroes removes that pretension stick from its butt More About: Pilot
Heroes - 2x01 "Four Months Later"
More articles from this author:2007-09-26 05:48:00 So remember when I praised the season 1 finale for how adeptly it flouted proper storytelling conventions? The second season premiere flouted proper storytelling conventions, but without half the breathless élan of the S1 finale. Even ignoring the fact that the premiere has to refrain from awesomeness of the revelatory type, "Four Mont hs Later" did little more than trot out a litany of cliches More About: Heroes 1, 2 |
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