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Moonelicious
2007-03-02 19:40:00
It's practically a full moon and I'm hungry like the wolf. The heat is finally working again, I'm well again and it's practically Spring....sort of. There are these little white flowers blooming in our garden.It's time for broad noodles with spicy bolognese. for the full experience go to Collective Heartburn
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Fashioneedy
2007-03-01 16:58:00
After reading Mike's post, I felt inspired to go out to Foetex and buy this fashion-free sweater. The fact that my house has no heat right now also inspired me to do so, and Foetex was the closest place. Getting over bronchitis and the flu, who wants to travel for clothing???That's Beverly Hills 90210 playing on the tele in the background in honor of my retro 1992 new "look".for the full experience go to Collective Heartburn
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Danish Culture Quiz
2007-03-01 12:12:00
This link provides a series of 40 questions (in Dani sh ) that will become standard for attaining Danish citizenship. They consist of questions of history, geography, religion, education and so on. I have developed some hard questions of my own that I felt were shamefully left out. They are as pertinent to modern Danish culture as parliament is. Feel free to give your answers in comments and I will post the correct answers at a later date.1) When slicing Ribehus cheese using a standard Stelton, must one slicea)toward or b) away from oneself?2) Which of the following would be inappropriate to put on top of liver patea) crunchy fried onions b) sliced cucumber c) remoulade or d) bacon 3) What would you least likely hear when someone wants to pass you on the sidewalk?a) MÃ¥ jeg komme forbi? (may I come through?) b) undskyld mig (excuse me) c) nothing but a shove d) a frustrated, impatient and passive aggressive sigh 4) Which is the instrument least likely to be used when opening a bottl...
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Danmarks bedste ide!
2007-02-28 16:55:12
Can someone please tell TV2 that zip-lock bags have been around for a long time in the USA? The idea was rejected on the show Danmarks Beds te Ide (Denmark's Best idea).While we're on the subject how about informing DK that mixing ice cream flavors live is nothing new either.And pasta is NOT a Danish food.for the full experience go to Collective Heartburn
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Let's get dirty!
2007-02-28 16:55:12
New Video on Collective Kitchenfor the full experience go to Collective Heartburn
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Challah Back!
2007-02-28 16:55:12
Thanks Mike. That's just what I did! This is challah bread. Delicious! Home made, right hear from your friendly Nordic Collective Kitchen.for the full experience go to Collective Heartburn
More About: Allah , Back , Hall , Alla

Hold the Motzi!
2007-02-28 16:55:12
When I saw this I became giddy. Could it really be true? Did I find a challah bread here in Lutheran Ribe??? Did some young baker somehow travel and take the recipe with him...or perhaps bastardized it slightly? And what about that floury stuff on top?No Ha-motzi here. It's quite hard and bland, not unlike the town itself. I'd better start making my own. Why is good bread so scarce in Denmark? I don't get it. So many bakeries, such a popular thing here. Bread for breakfast and lunch. I miss Zito's bakery or even any mediocre New York bakery tops most here. Maybe I'll open my own here with real challah and bagels and more beautiful, lighter, more elegant bread.Actually Pompei has quite nice bread. Too bad it's closing (I think). The monster Føtex and Kvickly have taken over the baking corner as well. Pompei's bread is always fresher and less dry than other bakeries around. I can taste the love in what they bake. Verona bakery in Copenhagen is also a favorite of mine. It'...
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What a great day!
2007-02-28 16:55:12
August 2006 with my friend Sheri. It was a light, happy day at the Museum of Natural History, drinks at a local, cheesy dive pub with too many nachos. There was some misunderstanding as to exactly what we got tickets for until we entered the planetarium. For some reason we thought it would be an innovative digital art show in three dimensions to the sounds of Radiohead, in an environment conducive to sights and sounds that is...well...out of this world. It was a glorified laser light show like the ones I'd go see in high school back in the 80s when we'd hop a train into the city, use our fake IDs to get piss beer and sniff rush to laser Zeppelin and Pink Floyd at the Hayden Planetarium. Same place. As I laughed almost until my abdomen burst, a couple next to us shushed me. We had to move. There were couples throughout the dome leaning into each other, as such music as Radiohead, REM, David Bowie and many lesser talents played to the digital, laser scribblings of various digital...
More About: Great , What , Hat , T A G

The un-blog
2007-02-28 16:55:12
This is not/no longer a "blog". It's whatever. I might discuss anything but daily events, so in that sense it is not a "log". Maybe of thoughts or memories, but there's not much to talk about from around here.for the full experience go to Collective Heartburn
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Quicker than you can say cous cous!
2007-02-28 16:55:12
New video on Collective Kitchen! In a hurry? Try this quick and easy dish. for the full experience go to Collective Heartburn
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No one like you
2007-02-28 16:55:12
Remember this one?for the full experience go to Collective Heartburn
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Impression
2007-02-28 16:55:12
I barely knew her. I saw her a bunch of times in school, in the cafeteria where the Parsons students would mingle with the New School and Lang students. The jazz musicians would rehearse in the corner and I heard her sing, You'd be so nice to come home to. Then my crush developed.I'd sit in the newly renovated lounge area and wait for the musicians to get started. I'd often skip classes to hear the music, or maybe to see her. I never knew her name except for once when I saw her in Dojo. She was my waitress. We chatted. I told her I'd seen her before and that I loved the way she sang. Her name floated over me while I paid too close attention to her eyelashes. A year before the renovation there were large boxes to sit on arranged like bleachers. They were fireproof. We all put our cigarettes out in them. The room was always smoke filled until after the renovation when smoking got banned from the building. By fall of 1990 the building was smoke free. By the end of 90 I was tryin...
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The Fence
2007-02-28 16:55:12
We left the other campers, the acoustic jam session on the grass, the tents in the yard, the cases of beer in green cans bought in Germany to save some kroner, and for me, the blur of glottal stopped, muffled Teutonic tones of what would eventually become my second language. We headed along a path, two hands melting in the August heat. We were naturally human in our affection, impractical physical contact, in which keeping warm was far from our objective.We stopped at the horses. As I reached down to touch the string fence I asked, "how do these little strings keep them from jumping out onto the road"?She tried answering the boy who grew up amidst strip malls, McDonald's, and over-crowded developmental neighborhoods. The kid whose mother went to get her nails done and have her hair set once a week. The one who never spent a day in the country so close up. The boy whose closest encounter with a horse was near Central Park or next to one of New York's finest in the NYPD equestrian u...
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Movies I'd like to see
2007-02-28 16:55:12
andThe top one, Notes on a Scandal is a film with two Elizabeths playing opposite one another in what looks like a mix of Single White Female, Fatal Attraction and To Sir with Love.Little Children looks like a creepy, trippy suburban horror flick, but I believe it doesn't involve anything paranormal or super natural. It's just simply a trippy suburban horror flick.I think it's time to get back to the movies.Wish me luck on tomorrow's exam presentation!for the full experience go to Collective Heartburn
More About: Movies , Movie , Like

I hate the swim hall
2007-02-28 16:55:12
It's one of those things I truly do not like to do, but one of those extraordinary treats for my daughter...well now both of my daughters. The little one is not SO little anymore and now appreciates a good hour or two in what I refer to as aquachaos. The Ribe Swim Hall on a weekend is what I imagine a busy street in China to be like, only with many collisions.The journey through the hurricane (sort of - 21mph winds) was met with the possibility of being turned away due to over-booking. Relief worked it's way through me mixed with feelings of guilt and disappointment for the girls. We finally were admitted and got in a good hour. Good for them. The place is packed with children of all ages. They swim or paddle in every direction, kids jumping off the edge, paying no attention to where they might land. Aggressive boys kick and splash and belly flop, paddle with large plastic and foam oars, swinging them blindly in all directions. They slam large hard plastic balls at each other....
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New Trailer
2007-02-28 16:55:12
Come over for a meal anytime! for the full experience go to Collective Heartburn
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Strange fakts
2007-02-28 16:55:12
The lactating male of Tanzgovia is one of the World's hidden phenomena of the human species. The men grow no higher than 3.5 feet tall and weigh and average of 300lbs. Often by outsiders they're referred to as "God's mistake", but to the women and non-lactating men of the tribe they are considered divine creatures of fertility and fortification. They serve at wet nurse to many of the village's newly born, while the new mothers go on the traditional quest for golden teeth.for the full experience go to Collective Heartburn
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Negerboller
2007-02-28 16:55:12
So my little daughter just turned one on 20 January. She also just started daycare. It's customary to have a little birthday celebration the first day back. Her birthday was on Saturday so we had a little fest in daycare the Monday back. That was yesterday. My wife and I brought snacks for the kids to enjoy. We brought Floedeboller and fruit bars. Here in Denmark it's perfectly acceptable to call these little floedeboller (chocolate covered cream filled buns), negerboller. That translates directly into nigger buns. Well I'm not so sure HOW acceptable, but acceptable enough for one of the daycare teachers to say, "come children. Come get some nigger buns"WTF? I wanted to say something, but I didn't. It was supposed to be a celebration so I didn't want to start a conflict with a bunch of toddlers present and ruin my little girl's party. I've heard the excuse before of how it doesn't have the same meaning. Bullshit I say. Maybe there's not hate behind it, but there's a world...
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Cultural Intrusion?
2007-02-28 16:55:12
Some interesting points were made on the previous post. One of which was a comparison between the subject matter and a small town in the US. I guess I could take the incident I experienced in a small Danish play room and apply it to any small town in America or in certain cases from time to time it might be found in any small apartment in New York City.One reason an incident here stands out more to me here might have to do with the less at home feeling I have. That's my fault and my resistant attitude. Another reason might be that I don't have enough of the small town American experience to have had it stand out for me over there. I have never spent a long enough period amongst non-urban people to have noticed these things. Over here I live in a small town and I guess this is what's it's like. Not to lump all small towns into the same mentality, but it's the particular "small town" mentality of racial ignorance I'm referring to.Of course it's natural, when you live in a plac...
More About: Cult , Cultura , Sion , Cultural , Intrusion

Laust?
2007-02-28 16:55:12
How about a Danish point of view on the last couple of posts? Anyone? Laust?Tell me if I'm jumping out of bounds or what the feeling or thinking is behind "negerboller"? Am I wrong in where I've been standing with the comments? for the full experience go to Collective Heartburn

[A] Danish POV
2007-02-28 16:55:12
Here's a comment from my pretty liberal, Dani sh blogger friend: Laust said... "Here's my (genetically verifiable) Danish take on the issues at hand.First off, virtually all Danes were peasants three generations ago. You were born in some shitty village somewhere, and you would die in that same village and only be subjected to very few outside influences. On the use of words like 'negerboller' ('nigger-buns) and 'jew' (verb: to steal), I doubt that anyone would not be aware of the racist/antisemistic meaning of those terms. I think that the reason that some Danes (and I would ague that the use is rather limited) would use these words anyway is that, since this is Denmark, no jews or persons of African origin will be around to take offense. And if someone were around, Danes might just presume that they would know not to take it seriously because 'we didn't mean it in a harmful way'. I think that this mindset is very Danish. Take the cartoon crisis...
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Attention Copenhagen Bloggers!
2007-02-28 16:55:12
I shall be in your city around the 3rd week in February. I thought it might be nice to gather ourselves together for an afternoon or evening and do something worth posting about. What do you say? Feel free to E-mail me. jb@collectiveheartburn.comfor the full experience go to Collective Heartburn
More About: Blogger , Copenhagen , Open , Blog , Bloggers

Get me the butter
2007-02-28 16:55:12
I just had a conversation that makes me want to take the "butt" out of butter. It was actually a description of the impending procedure I must undergo in one week from today. My Danish is passable, but I wanted an English translation of the literature I received from the hospital. It's medically related so I didn't want to lose any bit of information.The instructions went something like this: Nurse: at 7am you shall drink one of these bottles with the saft water or water....hvad hedder det paa englsk (what's it called in English)...uhh...saft water... Me: oh saftvand? (like punch.) Nurse: yes..exactly (at this point it's already like we're on the $20,000 pyramid) Nurse: then you shall not eat any solid food the whole day (before). You should only drink, drink, drink...also drinks which inhold (contain) sugar. You may have soup, but with nothing in it. Me: hot water? Nurse: yes. At 1pm you should take 2 of these pills.. Me: are they la...
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They've done it
2007-02-28 16:55:12
Someone tipped off someone who tipped off someone else and had me cleared from my former position on google for my Zune Squirt post. I'm off the map completely I think. There is someone from a site called Zune Gear who referred my post. That still comes up as number three. I'm just wondering why they are referring to me as reepher. Is it a play on refer? Or I must be on reefer to have written such a post? Does anyone really care? Probably not. for the full experience go to Collective Heartburn
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Zune Police?
2007-02-28 16:55:12
I'm getting a little nervous. It seems that the Microsoft people might have caught on to my number one spot on Google with Zune Squirt as I just checked my stat counter and the last 30 something visitors seem to be from the Microsoft Corporation.The path leads to my Zune Squirt Yuck post. I wonder what they're up to. Could they be thinking of battling for the position? Maybe I could sell it to them. "Hey Microsoft. I'll forfeit my position on search engines if you give me...um....$1,000,000." If life could only be like that. If it only worked that way. If it were only up to me. Maybe they can manipulate my mind and turn me into one of them, working for the Corporation, writing witty little things about Vista. Well I can still squirt farther than they can!$2,000,000?for the full experience go to Collective Heartburn
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New Products
2007-02-28 16:55:12
Protest Barbie and Sexually ambiguous Kenfor the full experience go to Collective Heartburn
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Shopping with dad
2007-02-28 16:55:12
Back in June 2005 we got to Roosevelt Field. My father's generosity brought us there for birthday presents of shoes and new glasses. It's been years since we did this. Now, with a span of years behind us, living in separate countries and before that in separate homes since I became an adult - If you can call it that - there is little recollection of what it was like to shop with my father as a child.Memories began as I started to look after style, while he inquired about practicality and durability. By inquired I mean the immediate questions before I could ask about any particular pair. "these gonna last long?" "these water proof?" "What's the difference between water proof and water resistant?" "He can wear these all year round?" "He can wear these with anything right? J (addressing me) - gray'll go with everything. It's neutral. You can wear it with any color. Also jeans, slacks...look at these soles..You'll have these for the next 30 years. Florsheim..the best!!..y'all g...
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snow
2007-02-28 16:55:12
Tropical depression winds and rain enough to fill the fields to look like lakes and unusually warm temperatures have been the general climate for the past several weeks. Today is the first snow since November. The first truly cold day since early November. The grass in the yard before the light sheet of snow fell on top of it, looked fresh, healthy and green as grass in Spring.The trade off for a bright and sunny day here in Winter is a temperature below freezing. Indoors is the deception in this solar powered house. The Sun into the windows creates a spring-like day. If I squint my eyes I can convince myself that the rooftops around are painted white and the trees are birch.for the full experience go to Collective Heartburn
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