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Up in the Night

Up in the Night
I am a single, work-at-home mom trying to raise healthy, happy kids. I freelance to pay the mortgage and fill the fridge. If you know where I can blog for food, let me know--I would love to earn a living writing about vomit and poo. It is what I know
Articles: 1, 2, 3, 4


Spring is here!
2008-05-19 16:36:00
You know how I can tell it’s spring? Whatever has been rotting in my van all winter long begins to thaw out and smell. Very bad. And the longer the winter the worst the smell. So I’m sure you can imagine my van is very “ripe” this season. Unfortunately there’s been more hibernating in my van than a foul odor. The floor is littered with backpacks, winter coats, Happy Meal toys, fruit rollup wrappers, empty DVD cases, and dirty, wadded-up socks, to name a few things I can identify. I won’t ruin your day with descriptions of what I can’t. We could travel across the states and my children would have a set of clothes, a lap full of toys, and enough stale French fries to make it to Nebraska. Not to mention each time the door would open and close we’d leave something behind, a sorry cross between the Clampetts and Hansel and Gretel. And I’ll blame it all on my seven-year old son who sits in the backseat alone, eating leftovers from his Superman lunchbox and...
More About: Spring
Brainless in Idaho
2008-05-14 03:44:00
I'm not sure what this whole blog-aversion thing is about for me, but I've had a tough time keeping it regular (blogging, people. WW has been an immense help in the "other" department, thank you very much!). So just a quick update on my life: I'm applying for a job as a contract writer. It won't change life for me much, except I'll have X number of guaranteed hours/wk (and a regular paycheck--knock on wood).I've lost a total of 13.8 pounds so far. And it's been fabulous. I feel fantastic, and while I'm not uber thin yet, just you wait. I'll inflect those 'after' pictures on you yet.I elliptical and use a Zune, so if you have any playlists for my exercising pleasure, do share. I've been trying to put together an independent women mix of late, so any suggestions are greatly appreciated.Kaleb and Zack turned 7 & 4 respectively (they share a birthday--Cinco de Mayo). I can't believe how big my boys are! Maybe I can...
More About: Idaho
5 going on 30...
2008-04-24 16:59:00
We’ve spent considerable time teaching our children their phone number and address in case they ever get lost and have to tell the nice policeman where they belong. And just last week my daughter demonstrated acute recall ability when she began handing out said phone number to little boys in her kindergarten class. How do I know this? One of said boys called two afternoons ago while my daughter was with her grandmother. Our conversation went something like this: Me: Hello? Little Rico Suave: Hi. Is Leah there? This is Little Rico. Me: She’s with her grandmother. LRS: Could she play at my house later? Me: No. LRS: I’ll call back later. Me: 10 years from now would be good. LRS: What? When I confronted my daughter she informed me that Little Rico wasn’t a boyfriend. And as any child springing from my loins is wont to do, she turned the conversation into a semantic debate. She explained, “I took the word ‘boy’ and ‘friend’ apart. I told Little Ric...
I was honked at today, and I’m still not over it.
2008-04-23 17:16:00
Here’s what happened: This morning I went to drop my kids off at school, determined to remain calm regardless of the chaos that is “get ready for school.” Kaleb and Leah began fighting over who would open the door. Kaleb opened it, Leah closed it and tried reopening it only to be cut off by her brother. And since I couldn’t reach the door myself, this happened one more time before the car behind us honked. I told my children they needed to get out. Now. Disoriented by the honking, both my dear, dear children seemed to forget how to open the van altogether, so I opened my door, walked over to their side and opened it for them. By this time a string of cars had backed up behind us and the Honker was giving me the exaggerated shoulder shrug. I sent my kids off, finally, and went to get back into my car. Guess what? It was locked. And all my knocking on the window didn’t rouse Zack from his car seat. I looked back at the Honker apologetically only to be given...
More About: Today
Artistic Musings, by Zack
2008-04-21 17:38:00
Zack is becoming quite the artist. To demonstrate, I thought I'd share some of his recent masterpieces:Not only do you get to see Zack's very phallic self-portrait, but you also get a glimpse at the nasty color of my kitchen counters.And here's a picture of me and my son holding hands. Notice how ginormous I am in comparison to him--something I am currently trying to remedy.And here's my favorite. Zack and I riding a unicorn.
More About: Musings , Artistic
"Before" Pictures
2008-04-18 15:11:00
In an amazing act of faith, my Weight Watchers buddy and I donned our swimming suits and took “before” pictures of one another in my playroom.Let me preface this by saying that even when I was thin (size 11 is thin to me) you wouldn’t find me dead in a swimming suit. (Unless, of course, I had drowned in a swimming pool and the handsome lifeguard had to rip off my tank top and cover-up shorts in a valiant attempt to save my life.)But yes, we decided (and without the help of mind-altering medication) to document just how big we are (and by “we” I mean “me” because really, my friend’s a reed in the wind). And isn’t it amazing how your mind often protects you from the truth, convincing you that you’re not as wide as you really are. Because when you see the picture you realize it appears as if you have swallowed a Frito Lay truck. Whole. Generally speaking, of course.So now I have blackmail-worthy photos on my camera and I’m afraid to download them to my computer. B...
More About: Pictures
For the record…
2008-04-16 14:47:00
The truth is I have no shame. I share far too much about myself and my life on this blog. Often that means I feel the need to reblog and clarify something that may have been misstated in a previous post. I don’t know why I do that. Probably because my perspective needs a little reframing and blogging about it helps me to process my thoughts better. You know, cheaper than therapy.My last post freaked me out a bit. Maybe because I posted about dating out loud. Your comments, one phone call and my own musings had me emotionally hyperventilating in a corner. So, for the record, I haven’t started dating yet. I have no plans to date anytime soon. I’m still trying to reorient myself following the divorce and a very long winter—so long in fact, those two things have become inseparable in my mind. (Which is why I shake my fists at the heavens each time it snows. And yes, it did snow yesterday.)I feel like I’ve come out of a coma. It’s odd to consider dating a possibility. And my ...
When Friends Try to Set You Up
2008-04-15 06:36:00
Warning: If my friend or the man she currently wants to set me up with ever start reading this blog, I will promptly delete this post and any related to it. There. You’ve been warned.I had been divorced about a month when my friend called. “Okay,” she said. “I have this great guy I’m dying to set you up with.”“What?” I asked, because I hadn’t expected this conversation so soon.“But we have to wait until his wife dies.”“WHAT?”“It’s a long story, but they were filing for divorce before she got into thisaccident and now she’s in critical condition.”???“Shauna?”“I’m here…”“He’s great though,” she said."How do YOU know single guys?” I asked because she's married, and I hadfinally wrapped my brain around the fact that my new friend sees my perfectmatch in a married guy with an ailing wife.“But we don’t have to talk about it until she dies,” she said. “Or theirdivorce is final.”And that, my friends, is how I was reintroduced ...
More About: Friends
Joining Weight Watchers
2008-04-11 17:27:00
I think I realized just how frumpy I’d become when my daughter informed me that the neighbor girl had said I was a “little fat.” My lovely daughter defended my honor and told me that she had said, in no uncertain terms, that her mommy is NOT fat. Bless her heart. I was flattered that the neighbor girl just said a little.But I’m doing my best to defrump myself. My hair’s been coifed and colored for two weeks now. And while I’ve taken that first big step towards overcoming my Salonaphobia I have yet to tackle that aversion to healthy food. The one that’s made me a “little fat.” And a lot frumpy.So last night, after one Last Supper at Wendy’s, I joined Weight Watchers.Shortly after 7:30pm on Thursday night I was weighed in. I was assigned a healthy weight range. I was told about points. I was feeling thin already.When joining any weight-loss plan one should journey with a friend, preferably the one who’s always told you that you’re not fat at all. I brought mine...
More About: Weight Watchers
In Which I Cut the Cable
2008-04-09 17:33:00
About three weeks ago I cut the cable. To our television, that is. I wish I could say it was for noble reasons: to end to the promotion of unhealthy social norms, the hijacking of valuable freelance time, and my three-year old’s uncanny ability to recognize the trademarks and ad slogans for all preschool toys. But simply put, it was an unnecessary indulgence. Okay, okay. More simply put, I could no longer afford it.I expected long and excruciating tantrums after which I would have to explain how important it is to entertain oneself rather than sit mindlessly in front of a television set. I’m proud to say I haven’t thrown one of those tantrums yet this week. So I’m getting better.My kids, on the other hand, are taking it well. Thankfully, my decision to cut the cable came simultaneously with the first sign of spring. (Now tell me you don’t believe in God.)So I am the one experiencing withdrawals.I realized just how bad my—ahem—problem was when visiting my parents over s...
More About: Cable
Revisiting the Frump
2008-04-03 20:06:00
You may recognize some of this from a previous post. I stole the first two paragraphs for a column on my frumpiness. But it talks about my new haircut so I decided it was fair blogger game.Okay, I’ll admit it. I’ve let myself go. I’ve let myself go far into the frump.At the peak of this slippery slope I was well-intentioned. I had three children in three years; I was surrounded by little people who loved me with or without good makeup and hair; and the only adults I “interacted” with were guests on Oprah and Dr. Phil. But my oldest is now six and I must admit that I’ve slid off the slope to land, belly-up, in the frumpy gully. It’s a sad day, folks. Can’t look away though, can you? It’s like a train wreck. With cellulite.So as a newly divorced woman who’s had people threaten to set me up on dates (more on THAT later), I’ve had to take a good, hard look at myself and admit that this girl’s come a long way from her highlighted hair and skinny jeans.Last week, w...
No, I'm Not Dead
2008-03-28 20:37:00
Sheesh, one entire month is even a record for me. But it’s been a month full of freelance, two roadtrips (one with, one without children), a sickness (recycled), a post-winter snowstorm in which I cursed the heavens and was cursed in return, a dead laptop (see?), a new and improved laptop, the termination of cable, the panic attack following the termination of cable, a revived Diet Coke addiction, and Spring Break (in which my children were reunited for much fighting and chaos—it’s amazing how many hours are in a school day).Thanks so much to everyone who posted, emailed, or called wondering if I were 1) dead or 2) a recent winner of the lottery (thanks, Karen!). I’m neither. But for awhile I was too depressed or distracted to blog; I’m still uncertain which it was. But here I am, enjoying a nice break with the kids at my parents’, eating fine food (thanks, mom), getting my taxes done (thanks, dad) and bingeing on cable (dare I say, “High School Reunion” and “Ro...
More About: Dead
A Rose by Any Other Name Still Smells Better Than Cat Puke
2008-03-05 05:06:00
Is it just me or do all moms test far too many things with their noses throughout the course of the day? Just yesterday I sniffed at the milk to see if it had turned, checked some bed sheets to see if I could smell pee, followed a nasty trail to the basement where our cat had gotten sick, sniffed through a pile of clothes to see if they were dirty, and tracked down my son’s moldy snow boots. (Picture me, the ginormous nose with a Sherlock Holmes cap on top…)Was it pregnancy that heightened my sense of smell? I can root out the one poopy child in a room of twenty. I can find that one (okay, maybe two...all right...three!) rotten Tupperware containers at the back of my frig. I can walk into a room and within seconds drop to my knees in search of an accosting odor. (This superpower only seems to have two loopholes: one, all raw meat smells bad to me, and two, I cannot find whatever has crawled into the back of my minivan to die, regardless of two excavations and countless Lysol int...
More About: Rose
I Heart Like-a-Star
2008-03-04 20:08:00
Some people are on the ball, I tell ya. But boy am I glad Like-a-Star is one of them because she just made my day.I signed up for GustoGirl's Easter swap and got my gift today. And look at what Rachel, aka Like-a-Star, sent me:Included:An adorable apronA calendarEaster candyEgg-shaped sidewalk chalk (Leah is going to be estatic!)A "spring" decorationAn egg-decorating stamp kitI know! Not only is Rachel punctual, but she totally went over the 5-item limit. I heart you Like-a-Star. Now I'm totally excited to get my Easter Swap package in the mail today. (Thanks, GustoGirl for coordinating the whole thing). Isn't the blogosphere fabulous?!
More About: Heart
I Heart Aidan Shaw
2008-03-01 06:01:00
First, a confession. I watch Sex in the City. Okay. So that's not the whole of it. I am a Sex in the City fan. I know. That’s a shocker considering I’m a straight-laced Mormon girl who is small-town celibate and probably will be for years to come (ouch!). But I watch the reruns (edited, of course) on TBS and feel like Carrie Bradshaw is my best friend. Go ahead—roll your eyes. But can you blame me? I have no social life (no offense, guys. My virtual social life is booming but my real social life is on the skids).And I love Aidan Shaw . LOVE. HIM. Would marry him if he were real. And liked me. Enough to propose.For those of you who are unfamiliar—Carrie, amidst all her Mr. Big angst, dates Aidan Shaw twice. And breaks his heart twice. Each time she does I cry out (as if in slow motion), “NOOOOOOOOOOOOO.” And then, “Come to mama, Aidan …” (Leave it to me to crush on a fictional character…)Tonight, after watching yet another episode where Aidan swoons over Carrie, I...
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Sunday Musings, Hosted by Leah Belknap
2008-02-28 22:53:00
Those of you who read Up in the Night regularly (and I thank you for the volunteer effort) know that my daughter has some of her best moments in church. In fact, I like to call them her Sunday Musings .This past Sunday was no different. Assigned to give a talk in sacrament meeting, I arrived about 20 minutes early, my rowdy crew in tow, so I could farm my children out to sit with different families before church started. We could hear the choir practicing in the chapel as I hung up Zack’s coat and the kids loitered in the foyer. At the precise moment the choir ended their song, Leah yelled at Kaleb, “I’m going to kick you in the penis!” The elderly woman walking past seemed to clutch her heart and stagger a bit. Two older boys stood by stupefied, waiting to see what I would do.I whisked my children into the hallway where I told Leah that “penis” was not a very reverent word; I also told Kaleb that whatever he had done to provoke the threat couldn’t have been much better...
More About: Hosted
Big Boy Pants
2008-02-27 21:46:00
Some of you may recall that I’ve tried training him 5 times already; one of the “sessions” I detail here. Some of you may recall my complaints of failure; one of which I detail here. So it seems appropriate that I publicly announce that my youngest offspring, Zackary William Belknap, has officially been potty-trained, and it took place in one day.Please, people, hold your applause. The kid is four months shy of his fourth birthday and most potty-training over-achievers are diaperless by two. This kid was determined to do this on his own schedule, taking control of this one thing, regardless of all surrounding him that remained out of control.You know what? I take that back. Stand up! Give the kid a hearty round!And then, one day (Friday, February 22nd to be exact), he announced, “I want to wear underpants.”What? I shook my head a bit.For a couple months now I had been asking him if he wanted to wear underpants. Daily. This day I had forgotten. Wow. “You want to wear unde...
More About: Pants
An Introspective Meme
2008-02-27 17:23:00
The Prairie Preacher has tagged me with this interesting meme. My Own Woman created it and these are her instructions:1. List ONE desire that you have if you could live in a perfect world.2. Then send a link to ONE person who will then copy your desire and add ONE desire of his own that he/she would want in his/her perfect world.3. He/She will then link ONE person who will add his/her perfect world item.....and on and on. Make sure you leave the name of the person you linked to everyone can see who you linked and what the perfect world will contain."Because this meme hasn’t gone too far yet, I thought I’d include all participants’ descriptions of their perfect world."In My Own Woman's perfect world people of all sexes, creeds, race, and sexual orientation would live in perfect harmony with each other. Hate crimes against such people would be a note in a history book so as not to be repeated. "We love Shawn, the Prairie Preacher, and here’s what he added:“In The Prairie Pr...
More About: Meme , Introspective
Why I Suck at Love and Logic
2008-02-26 17:47:00
For eight weeks now I’ve been taking this class based on the fairly popular series of books on Parenting with Love and Logic . Now I’ve gotta say, I like me some love and logic. Everything I’ve heard and read resonates with me and is thus far the best parenting approach I’ve encountered. Unfortunately, I suck at it.Now you’re going to have to contact Professor Dewey about the particulars, but my limited understanding of love and logic goes something like this: enable your kids to be accountable for their choices and love them through each and every one (of course that’s the bare bones crib-notes version, but heh, I suck at it, remember?).So tonight was my last class. Sadly, if today had been finals I would have failed (Sorry, Professor Dewey). And here’s why:I asked my kids to do their chores. When Kaleb realized one of his chores was to clean his room, he wigged out. Now Kaleb, like his mother, is quick to wig. So I acknowledge that it’s probably a genetic weakness, ...
More About: Suck
The Soundtrack of My Life
2008-02-22 08:25:00
I have decided there’s something that would make my life easier. And it doesn’t involve the lottery or prescription medication. I need a soundtrack.Let me explain.Would a romantic comedy “work” if it didn’t include a musical montage showing the couple falling in love? Can you imagine Rocky running up the steps of the Philadelphia Art Museum without his own personal serenade? And admit it, you’ve always wanted to burst into song and dance complete with your own chorus line reminiscent of Seven Brides for Seven Brothers, right?A soundtrack would rock my world. Literally.One of my most embarrassing moments involved me singing the Pointer Sisters’ “Jump” into a purple hairbrush. I was fourteen and dancing to the radio, full-blast, in front of our hallway mirror. I didn’t know my father had walked in until I saw his reflection. He was a self-disciplined man. And very kind. He didn’t laugh at me.As a teenager I knew that music seemed to make everything easier. I’ve...
More About: Life , My Life , Soundtrack
The Anatomy of Divorce
2008-02-20 18:21:00
My lawyer’s legal assistant called yesterday to tell me the divorce was final as of February 15th. A bittersweet milestone. Nothing to celebrate except perhaps a better chapter in all our lives.After yesterday’s post I got an email from a concerned reader/friend wanting to know if my ex and I could work things out. I genuinely appreciate her interest in the well-being of my family. She’s someone who recognizes the tremendous impact a divorce can have on children and their parents. And I’d hate to think that anyone might mistakenly believe I have flippantly moved forward on this decision, taking marriage and the well-being of my children lightly.So this is just a quick post to say none of the following reasons caused me to file for divorce:· I was “unfulfilled” in my marriage· We had “grown apart”· I thought the grass was greener on the other sideMarriage is a beautiful, sacred thing. And at that point I reached the end of my post because I could exp...
More About: Divorce , Anatomy
Roof Update, #1
2008-02-19 18:26:00
Last week’s epiphany coincided with the pity party I was having over (well, really “under”) my roof. Yes, I was in the middle of a divorce. Yes, my pipes had just burst the previous weekend. Yes, I was a little strapped for cash and just barely making ends meet. And yes, the roof fiasco was poorly timed. How much can I take, really? That’s what I kept asking myself. I was practically shaking my fist heavenward.But then God shrugged. Get over yourself, Shauna. It’s a little leak; you can handle it. No, I don’t think God is mean enough to tell me to get over it. But I did feel a gentle nudge that came with a mild message: You’re tough. I know because I made you that way. And that was it. Pity party cancelled.So I climbed to my rooftop and chiseled away at the ice dam. It’s now gone and the stain on my bathroom ceiling has stopped spreading. But my exaggerated response has taught me something about myself (Hallelujah! Does that mean I can stop getting this same lesson o...
More About: Update , Roof
When Children Hijack Technology
2008-02-18 15:17:00
This weekend Kaleb added his thoughts to an article I was typing in Word."Kaleb puld hes toth owt."For those of you unfamiliar with first-grade phonetics, that would be: "Kaleb pulled his tooth out." (He's incredibly obsessed with loosing his teeth). And to answer that question: No, he has not (yet) successfully extracted another tooth.In other news, Zack hijacked my digital camera on Saturday night, taking roughly 35 pictures. Here's a glimpse into what I like to call the BlairZack Project: A budding photographer, no?[By the way, Kaleb's pink tongue is courtesy of his teacher's Valentine: a tooth-care kit which includes a tablet designed to determine where kids still need to brush. Hence the pink residue on his tongue...]So now you know two more things about us:We've paid a pretty penny for Kaleb's dental work.We all need therapy (Okay. So maybe you already knew this one...)
More About: Technology , Children , Hijack
6 Days Sober and Counting
2008-02-15 22:05:00
I don’t think I knew how addicted I was until I quit (and I’m using the word “quit” loosely—you know, the whole “counting chickens” thing).Last weekend I ran out of Diet Coke, and because I refuse to break the Sabbath to purchase my caffeine juice, I went to bed with a migraine starter. Two hours and one bucket o’vomit later I was sound asleep, on the tail-end of a prayer vowing never to drink again (you know, Diet Coke).But that wouldn’t be my last fit of withdrawals. Wednesday morning, a whole 4 days sober, I woke up with yet another head-splitting migraine. I realized that if I was THAT addicted that two detox migraines were necessary, it was time to leave the Diet Coke behind. For good. (loosely speaking, of course)And this morning my body demonstrated just how close I am to falling off the wagon (is it "off" or "on"? I’ve never known…).I craved me a soda, fully-leaded. But remembering my last migraine I got a Diet Sprite with lime instead. As soon as that ...
More About: Days , Sober , Counting
An Open Letter to Mother Nature
2008-02-10 00:20:00
Generally I appreciate a woman with your spunk, but, Mother (if I can call you that), it’s time to give it up. From one woman who knows bitter, I’m not afraid to tell you, you’ve got a chip on your shoulder the size of the ice dams on my roof. Did somebody hurt you in a past season? Because I believe the gracious citizens of this fine state prefer you key a car or TP a house than continue with this icy behavior. You know what I’m saying?And it’s not just me that’s noticed. There are the overworked snowplow guys. The mail carriers. And that poor girl down the street that walks to school. And did you know—it’s nearly impossible to buy a snow shovel. This is Idaho. We’re out of snow shovels in Idaho!So on behalf of the entire state I’m leading your intervention. Winter must end. Enough with the subzero temperatures, and the school cancellations, and the one-two punch. It’s time another season got some press.And although I’m not the only one you’ve assaulted, I...
More About: Nature , Open , Letter , Mother Nature
On Sabbatical
2008-02-05 19:00:00
Okay, so maybe it's not that bad; I might not be gone that long. But I recently discovered leaks in my roof which are causing me stress (something about ice dams compromising metal roof joints. Who da'thunk?). And stress is really not the word for it. Heart failure, maybe? Despair? Tunnel-vision where I've yet to see the light? I'm not sure. But right now it's all I can muster to make a living and take care of my children (Last night that I-am-mamma-so-everything-will-be-okay-bec ause-I-can-manage-it facade slipped from my face and I began to cry. It was a weep-fest and we all cried together. --I'm still feeling guilty for letting my children in on that little secret--I CANNOT manage it all).Whatever doesn't kill you, right?
Too Sexy for My Boots
2008-01-31 22:44:00
Take a gander at Idaho Falls standard-issue winter footwear. Fabulous, right? Sexy , no?No.Not at all.I got these nearly a year ago after realizing that shoveling the sidewalk in fuzzy slippers wasn’t working for me. Those toes? Kinda like to keep ‘em. Call it a foot fetish.But the other night at my parenting class (I’ll save that for another post) I saw a woman in fancy black boots, with heels. How she got from her car to the class without falling on her keister, I’ll never know. Me? I require Michelin-like treads on the bottom on my boots in order to make it up my front steps.How do women manage to look fabulous in inclement weather?Not only am I a jean-and-t-shirt kinda girl, I’m a clutz. So wearing heels of any kind, even in summer, becomes an exercise in staying alive. I avoid it. But maybe I could sport a more feminine boot next year.One not so Sasquatch.Any suggestions?A view of an Idaho Falls' winter from my front door.
More About: Boots
Broken Pipes, Part II
2008-01-30 21:34:00
It wouldn’t be fair for me not to share the rest of this story, because it does have a happy ending.About five minutes after I turned the water main off (the point at which I had decided the camel was indeed dead), the Primary President (Mormon Lingo Alert--MLA) called to ask me about my plans for the quarterly activity (MLA). I must have had that I’m-having-a-nervous-breakdown lilt to my voice because she asked, “Are you okay?” To which I immediately broke down into a weepy mess. Of course she asked if there was anything she could do. Of course I made light of the situation and told her I’d just call a plumber. (Note: she later brought me pizza and salad for dinner because, “what can you make without access to water?”)About five minutes after hanging up the phone, it rang yet again. This time it was a member of the bishopric (MLA) who said, and I quote, “I heard you’re having a bad day.” Now this is what I know about women having bad days. When anyone asks how w...
More About: Part , Pipes , Broken
An open memo to the handsome Sonic drive-thru guy
2008-01-29 14:56:00
First, I must say your customer service was impeccable. You were enthusiastic and friendly as you took my order for a Route 44. And even though it was not required, you still gave me a tasty mint to go with my drink. But, attractive and well-mannered young Sonic worker, as you man the window of this great American drive-thru, could you please not call me ma’am? I understand that my bumperless mini-van (yes, I lost the bumper shortly after Christmas, although patches of duck tape remain), permanent furrowed brow, and frumpy attire completely warranted this courteous greeting. But FYI, it totally killed my Sonic buzz.
More About: Drive , Open , Memo
The Camel Is Dead
2008-01-25 22:38:00
It was the pipe. And this is what happened.I was taking Leah and Zack upstairs for naps when I heard what sounded like a fan. A hissing fan. A hissing fan with a bad case of rabies.I looked at the wall curiously for approximately 5 seconds before I realized what was going on. That’s when I freaked. out. I can’t remember where I went first. To the garage where I could access the pipes and see the water flow? To the basement where I knew the water main shut-off was? Or upstairs to puzzle over which toiletry appliance was causing me grief? And this is when I started to swear. Sorry, gentle readers. I know you expect more from me. But I said the “S” word (if my kids were reading this they would say, “You said ‘stupid’?” Unfortunately, no. That’s not what I said). I said the OTHER “S” word. over. and. over. again. So really it sounded like I was saying “Sh-h-h-h-h-h-h…” [Aside: In case anyone has been performing research on whether or not swearing helps in str...
More About: Dead , Camel
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