my pointlessmy pointlessfunny videos, strange pictures, weird news... an assortment of things that amuse me. Articles
the best defense is a good offense??
2008-05-21 06:05:00 Let's say you are on trial for assault. Unfortunately, the trial doesn't seem to be going your way... and it looks like the jury is going to convict you. (The fact that you are guilty doesn't matter at this point.)What would seem to be your best choice?a. sit in court and try to look innocent.b. ask your lawyer to plea bargainc. beat up your lawyer in courtThis week, William E. Lehman chose the third option in a Minnesota court.It seems that Mr. Lehman was on trial for assault. He believed that his court-appointed defender, Mark Groettum, was doing a less-than-satisfactory job, so, he requested that the judge give him a new lawyer.The judge refused because he could find no reason to do so.That is when Mr. Lehman put a little crimp in his own case. He grabbed his lawyer and got him in a headlock. Then, he proceeded to punch him repeatedly in the face. All this took place in front of the judge and jury.After that, it didn't take much to convince the jury that Mr. Lehman was ... More About: Defense , Good
if we could talk with the aliens.
2008-05-20 06:05:00 Maybe he is right after all. (?)Earlier this month, I reported the story of a legislator in Denver, Colorado who wants his city to form an Extraterrestrial Affairs Commission... just in case a alien spacecraft someday collides with a school bus.Strange? Apparently not. It seems that the University of Wyoming is offering a course that addresses the same sort of concern.The university is offering a credited course to its English students entitled "Interstellar Message Composition." The course, which is sponsored in part by NASA (!), investigates how humans might be able to communicate with aliens someday.The course tackles such vital issues as:would aliens be able to hear?would they be able to speak?if not, how could we communicate with them?if we say something, what should it be?would they be able to translate what we say?"We’ve thought a lot about how we might communicate with other worlds, but we haven’t thought much about what we’d actually say," said Professor Jeffrey Lo... More About: Aliens , Talk
stupid men become enlightened
2008-05-19 06:05:00 Kevin Lee Lytle, 27, and Daniel Jay Basinger, 24, of Confluence, Pennsylvania, were smart enough to realize that copper is worth money.They were also smart enough to know that wire is often made of copper.So, putting their collective genius together, they realized that if they stole some copper wire and sold it as scrap, they could get some extra money.Armed with this knowledge, Kevin and Daniel hatched a plan-- they would climb a utility pole and steal the power lines. After all, what better place is there to find wire but on top of a utility pole?Unfortunately, apparently the men didn't know that wires on a utility pole are almost always live -- with lots of power.Their theft, as you might imagine, did not go so well. Both men succeeded in getting electrocuted, put the area in the darkness for five hours, and created $1,500 in damages.Daniel and Kevin have both been charged with attempted theft. Unfortunately, only one of them is well enough to attend the arraignment. The othe... More About: Stupid , Enlightened
utility pole gallery
2008-05-19 06:04:00 The story of the "utility pole bandits" (above) inspired me to post this collection of utility poles... each pole with its own problem-- More About: Gallery , Utility , Pole
42-year-old found 42-years-too-late
2008-05-16 06:05:00 Hedviga Golik was reported missing back in 1966. The Croatian woman would have been 84 this year.No one saw Hedviga leave her home. No one could locate her. So, everyone came to assume that she had simply moved out of her home in Zagreb and left no forwarding address. Her place was left unattended and no one ever moved in.Hedviga found this week-- 42-years after she was first reported missing.She was found in her own apartment. Her mummified remains were still sitting in a chair in front of a black and white TV set, with tea cup next to her chair.It appears that Hedviga made herself a cup of tea back in 1966, sat down to watch TV, and died.Authorities had broken into the small apartment to find out who owned it. It was then that they found Hedviga's body."So far we have no idea how it is possible that someone officially reported missing so long ago was not found before in the same apartment she used to live in." said a police spokesman.http://www.ananova.com/news/sto ry/sm_285... More About: Years , Late , Year
more from the police blotter
2008-05-16 06:04:00 could be. did he have a burrito? More About: The Police , Police
how not to sell a ladder
2008-05-16 06:04:00 it's an older clip... but still worth the watch...and reminds me of the man who mistook a moth for a horse More About: Sell
darth vader receives suspended sentence
2008-05-15 06:05:00 Some stories are strange on a lot of levels.In Holyhead, Wales, there is a group of people who call themselves the Jedi church. As you might imagine, the "church" is made up of around 30 people who find inspiration from the Star Wars films.Founded by Barney Jones (aka Master Mormi Hehol), this group believes that the Star Wars films give us insight and knowledge and serve as "a guide to living a better and more worthwhile life."They are serious. They have regular meetings to exercise their beliefs.Unfortunately, Darth Vader (aka Arwel Wynne Hughes) found out about a Jedi meeting (where a Jedi promotional video was being made) and decided to punish the insurrectionists.After finishing most of a 2.5 gallon box of white wine, Hughes donned his Vader costume. Then, wearing a black plastic bag as a cape, he attacked members of the church as they practiced a light-saber duel.Video tape shows Hughes yelling "Vader!! Jediis!" as he approached and attacked the hapless Jedi knights with a ... More About: Sentence
marital rating scale
2008-05-14 06:05:00 This chart was developed by Dr. George W. Crane back in 1939. Dr. Crane was a marriage counselor and wrote a nationally syndicated newspaper column entitled "The Worry Clinic."Dr. Crane tried to be "scientific" when he created this test. He interviewed 600 husbands about their wives positive and negative qualities. He then listed the most frequently mentioned merits or demerits. (really?? red nail polish was one??)However, Dr. Crane admittedly used his own personal bias in creating the order of the test. This is only the first page of the test. Since there were 50 items on the test, I am looking for the next four pages... and for the Husband's Chart.I gave this test to my wife a minute ago and she --OUCH. Hey! put that DOWN! dang. what's the matter with you??? Geezzzzzzzz-that just missed my HEAD. STOP IT!!! ...that stinking HURTShttp://www.boingboing.net/2008/05/13 /1939-marital-rating.htmlhttp://www.apa.o rg/monitor/2008/05/marriage.html More About: Scale
workplace safety (part 5)
2008-05-14 06:03:00 again, thanks to Jan for sending these... still more to come.link for previous workplace safety posts More About: Safety , Workplace , Part
inspired to stand tall
2008-05-13 06:05:00 Have you ever seen soldiers who seem to stay in perfect form and precise posture? In China, they employ some unique devices to make sure that their soldiers learn the right way to stand... and now, we know why they won't look down or turn to the side.http://blogs.reuters.com/oddly-enoug h/2008/05/07/i-am-not-spartacus/http://bl ogs.reuters.com/oddly-enough/2008/05/12/a nd-the-penalty-for-slouching-is/teachers: having trouble getting students to stand in line?parents: want your kids to sit up straight at the dinner table? More About: Tall , Stand , Inspired
look up in the air! it's a bird. it's a plane. it's a car.
2008-05-12 06:05:00 Homeowners understand that unusually bad weather may bring damage to their roofs: wind, lightning, hail, falling trees, flying cars.Last week, in Yanbain city China, a driver encountered a strong windstorm and a fast corner at the same time. The combination of the two launched his car off the road and onto the roof of a nearby house.The driver of the car told the China News Network, "Before I realized what was happening, my car had landed on the roof..."The high winds created a lot of damage. One repair shop said that they had to replace 30 windshields in one day-- the windshields had not been broken by wind-blown objects, but simply blown-in by the force of the wind.http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm _2846891.html?menu=news.quirkies&no_c j_c=1 More About: Plane , Bird
warning: some diet sodas may cause mutations.
2008-05-12 06:03:00 Another horrible Photoshop job.With a quick glance... I just didn't see the problem with this Fanta advertisement. Apparently, the ad agency missed it, too. However, the close-up shows that the graphic "artist" used Photoshop to create a mutant.http://photoshopdisasters.blogspot .com/2008/05/fanta-you-really-dont-wanta. html More About: Diet , Warning , Sodas
man saves self with kitchen surgery
2008-05-09 06:05:00 This story is amazing... but it will probably give you the creeps.Earlier this week, Steve Wilder of Omaha, Nebraska woke up just after midnight and found that he couldn't breathe. He knew that his windpipe had swollen shut.At that point, the 55-year-old Wilder realized that he needed to act quickly. He believed that the ambulance would arrive too late if he called 911. So, Wilder did something truly remarkable.He went to his kitchen and took a steak knife in hand... and gave himself a tracheotomy-- that's right-- he inserted the steak knife into his own neck and opened up his windpipe."|I| got a knife and located it and pushed in and blood went gush... I think I closed my eyes, but fear or something took over. I didn't feel no pain or nothing." The blood was squirting everywhere, but his lungs were inflating with air.Wilder (pictured above) then called 911 and was taken to the emergency room. He is expected to recover without any complications.Wilder is not a doctor nor was... More About: Kitchen , Surgery
sing, sing, -hic- sing, sing, everybody's -hic- gotta sing
2008-05-08 06:05:00 Twenty-four year old Christopher Sands is a professional singer who resides in Timberland, Lincolnshire, England.Unfortunately, Christopher can't sing much these days... because for the past year, Christopher has had a case of the hiccups.He contracted the hiccups a year ago and has been hiccuping ever since. Constantly. That, of course, has made his singing career almost impossible.The situation is so bad that he is planning to have surgery to fix the problem. Said Sands, "Any relief would be amazing."That's bad... but Christopher has no problem compared to Charles Osborne. According to the Guinness Book of World Records. Charles Osborn holds the record for longest bout of hiccups.Charles started hiccuping in 1922... and didn't stop until 1990.Charles hiccuped at the rate of up to 40 times per minute for 68 years. It is estimated that he hiccuped 430 million times in his life. Fortunately, he lived a normal life and actually ended up becoming famous for his hiccups.and ... More About: Sing , Gotta
world record Lego tower
2008-05-08 06:03:00 Lego blocks have been around for 50 years. In honor of the birthday, the world's tallest Lego tower has been constructed. It stands 100 feet tall and contains 500,000 Lego bricks.http://www.metro.co.uk/news/articl e.html?in_article_id=146120&in_page_i d=34http://gizmodo.com/387742/worlds-tall est-lego-tower-reaches-100+foot-mark More About: World , World Record , Lego , Tower , Record
goldfish: not just for bowls anymore
2008-05-07 06:05:00 Tired of that lazy, do-nothing goldfish? Bored with the same circle around the same bowl? Wish you had a dog that could fetch or play ball instead?How would you feel about a goldfish that can fetch, play basketball and even slalom?Dr. Dean Pomerleau, from Los Angeles claims to have developed a sure-fire method for training ordinary goldfish to do spectacular things. He claims to have taught his own goldfish, Comet, how to limbo, fetch, play soccer... and more. See the video below... see what you think of the amazing Comet.Dr. Pomerleau (who apparently has nothing better to do than spend hours training his goldfish), is even offering a kit so that you can train your own.http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_ 2842710.html?menu=news.quirkies&no_cj _c=1 More About: Goldfish
parents: help your kids excel in math and crime
2008-05-06 06:07:00 parents: are you looking for products that will help your child be more productive in school? Try these fun products... guaranteed to please!I say that nine and five be fourteen. More About: Kids , Crime , Math , Parents , Excel
the husband she bought was a major pain
2008-03-27 05:06:00 Liu Lian of Datong city in China found the perfect man to date her daughter. His name was Li Zhanyu. He was university educated and a major in the Chinese army. He also had ties that could give her daughter a good job.Maj. Li Zhanyu said he wanted to date Liu's daughter (and eventually marry her), but unfortunately, he was committed to another woman. To satisfy the commitments he made to the other woman, he needed approximately $22,000.For Liu Lain, it seemed like a good deal. For $22,000, her daughter would get a respected husband and a good job. So, she sent Li Zhanyu the money he needed to satisfy his commitment.Unfortunately, after Liu sent the money, Major Zhanyu disappeared.Realizing she had been probably been cheated, Liu reported the situation to the authorities.The police caught up with Li Zahnyu at an internet cafe and arrested him for fraud. When he was arrested, Zahnyu was incensed. He said, "You'll regret this. You'll pay for this. I'll call the leaders of t... More About: Pain , Husband
a real estate agent that tells the absolute truth.
2008-03-27 05:02:00 I asked her what the house would cost. She said, "dodi pedz! woma pake fqpc idym uflu vghud dirm;" More About: Truth , Agent , A Real Estate , Estate , Real Estate
driver, would you please arrest me and take me to jail?
2008-03-26 05:05:00 If you are going to rob a store, it is a good idea to have your own car for the get-away.This week, two teenagers in Oakville, Ontario, Canada robbed a convenience store and stole an undisclosed amount of money. Then, they fled on foot and hid in a nearby wooded area. They believed that they had made a clean get-away.That is where their plan fell-short.Needing a ride home, they naturally called the local taxi company and asked that a cab be sent to the wooded area. (nothing suspicious there)Meanwhile, the police had been tipped-off that the thieves were on foot and alerted the taxi company to inform them if they got any suspicious calls.When the call came in to the cab company, two police officers drove the taxi to the wooded lot. The young men got in and confirmed that they had called for the taxi.The police placed them under arrest and drove them right to the station.Detective Sargeant Kevin Mahar said, "Obviously not having a getaway vehicle or anything like that and calling ... More About: Arrest , Driver , Jail
political correctness gone awry
2008-03-26 05:02:00 Being politically correct has its place......but would it offend anyone to simply say that a black armband is black? More About: Political , Political Correctness
Crime Wave Hits Alachua County, Florida
2008-03-25 05:04:00 Clinton Demetrich Fields is shown as one of the "Most Wanted" men in Alachua County , Florida . No word on whether or not this photo has led to his arrest. More About: Crime , Hits , Wave
correction: looks like just a 682 pound flake
2008-03-25 05:01:00 hmmmm... despite Ananova's report that I cited yesterday, several other reliable sources report that the Great Illinois Corn Flake actually sold on Friday for a scant $1350. Making it a 682 pound (British) flake.www.cnn.com/2008/US/03/22/corn.flak e.ap/index.html www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23756725/Still, a pretty good chunk of money for a frosted flake. I am still selling my Wyoming Hershey bar for those interested. More About: Pound
the 682* pound corn flake
2008-03-24 05:08:00 A few weeks ago, 15-year-old Emily McIntyre of Chesapeake, Virginia, grabbed a handful of Frosted Flake s breakfast cereal while she was on her way to class.As she was putting one of the flakes into her mouth she noticed something peculiar about it. "Oh my goodness," she said, "it is Illinois." She showed it to some others who agreed that the flake looked like a map of the state of Illinois.Seeing potential profitability in the flake, her sister, Melissa, and her parents suggested that Emily try to sell it on eBay. She did just that, hoping to have some fun with it.The current bid for the flake? more than 682* British pounds, which is approximately equivalent to $1350.*The flake is currently in safe keeping, awaiting shipment. Emily plans to invest some of the money in more Frosted Flakes in hopes of replacing the treasure she is selling.http://www.ananova.com/news/story /sm_2774081.html?menu=news.quirkiesIt looks like a flake wants to buy the flake.By the way... I have a square ... More About: Corn , Pound
don't push that button
2008-03-24 05:03:00 Have you ever wondered what would happen if you pushed the emergency button at a gas station? Watch the guy in the blue striped shirt, who did this accidentally. More About: Button , Push
dog hair: it's not just for dogs anymore
2008-03-21 05:09:00 Most normal people like dog hair when it is actually being worn by a dog. But once it leaves the animal, we think of it as a nuisance. After all, dog hair fills the brush and clogs the drain. It gets embedded into the carpet. It collects in the corners of the dog-bed.Well, here's an idea: why not clean the brush and comb the hair out of your carpet... and then make a pull-over coat with it? If Rover doesn't shed enough, you can wait for him to die and then use all his hair to finish your project.What an idea! Just think of the coziness. Think of the warm memories you'll have of your loving pet. Imagine your smell on a wet day. Imagine the other dogs wanting to sniff you.Sound like a bad idea? Not according to Beth and Brian Willis.It seems that Mrs. Willis saw Princess Diana wearing a dog-fur coat one day and thought "Gee, I what a good idea. I can make my Brian one of those." And she did.She first made a sweater for her husband from hair they collected around the house.... More About: Dogs , Hair
stupid looking driver's license
2008-03-21 05:04:00 these guys really did this. the officials weren't happy. More About: Stupid , License
boy takes stick in mouth. oh. never mind.
2008-03-20 05:02:00 The person in the back is playing with a stick of some sort. The boy is eating a lollipop... but it was a perfect picture. More About: Mind , Mouth , Stick
video: the king of ear hair
More articles from this author:2008-03-20 05:01:00 Since I posted his story a week ago, I thought you might like to see the video. or not. More About: Video , The King , Hair , King 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 |
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