This Single Gal's New HouseThis Single Gal's New HouseThe trials, tribulations, and joys of owning a house as a single woman Articles
A Dating Story...
2008-06-06 07:09:00 Um is that the name of some cheesy show on Lifetime? "A Dating Story ?" Oh, no, wait, I'm thinking of "A Wedding Story" or "A Baby Story"... that's right... they don't do stories about pathetic people in their mid-30s lookin' for love.Oh, I sound bitter and cynical today...Well, I am.I've... ummm... had it. Dating story and all.This was my dating life today:1. I went out with a lovely chap a few weeks ago. Got an email from him today saying that he met someone else and wanted to pursue a relationship with her. Not me. Great. I hadn't heard from him in awhile, so I assumed that it was going nowhere and I'm not heartbroken about it, but ok... enough already.2. A colleague offered to set me up with a dude her boyfriend knows. I agreed on the set up. I always agree on the set up. You never know who you are going to meet and I generally love meeting new people. Well, after the email I got from him, I no longer agreed to the set up. (As you probably guessed, it takes a...
I fixed my furnace!
2008-05-30 02:36:00 That's right friends, my furnace is now working.And I fixed it myself.How, you may ask?I cleaned out the inducer valve (using a bent paper clip) and the thing started right up.(This was a trick the furnace repair man taught me during one of the 4 visits he had to make to fix the fucking thing in the winter)And this time, the trick worked.Whoo hoo! More About: Fixed
Ok, it's been a bad day
2008-05-30 00:48:00 Wait, have I said that before?Seems like I only blog when I'm really annoyed at the world or something hilariously bad has happened or there is a calamity to report.What does that say about me?So here are the annoying things that happened today:1. My furnace is broken. Again. I've decided not to fix it until the fall. So there, fucking furnace.2. I got a parking ticket.3. I got a notice in the mail that apparently I didn't pay a different parking ticket so now owe $60 for that one...4. my brother is getting married in Iowa over the summer. I'm excited about the wedding, but am very irritated by my parents' lack of making a commitment about their travel plans. And now plane fares have doubled (since 2 weeks ago) to my lovely midwestern destination.5. my job is driving me insane. love it normally, but i really need a vacation.6. found out yesterday that I may have to pay for some of my surgery expenses (due to the car accident) out of pocket due to policty limits, etc...
My shoes don't fit my carbon footprint
2008-05-27 04:09:00 Yeah.When I was in 7th grade, I competed in a smarty pants team sport -- Creative Problem Solving. Instead of scoring goals, we won "creative points" working in teams to solve the world's problems.Our team rocked -- a super nerdy scientist-type, a whiz kid literature quoter, the pop culture guru, and me -- the freak artist. We won several competitions (and cool ass multi-tiered trophies), going to state the final year we competed.Oh yeah, we were that cool.The issue we worked with in 7th grade was global warming. I remember being completely repulsed by the deforestation of Brazil by American companies like McDonald's. I was amazed by how the ice shelf was melting, how the food chain has been disrupted, and how people were causing chaos in the natural world.I was amazed, repulsed, and creatively solving the problem. In my team. For a trophy.I have to admit, my concern did not make a huge impact on my life at the time. It took about 20 years to sink in and Al Gore to poke me before ... More About: Shoes , Carbon , Carbon footprint
Bone,Thugs, and Harmony -- A)nother) Tale from A(nother) Single Gal
2008-05-25 18:42:00 So my friend Laura was walking down the street the other day, minding her own business, when a chap approached her."Good afternoon, miss." "Yeah?""Well, I just saw you walking down the street and I thought you were attractive so I..""Ok, thanks." And she starts to go."Wait, um," he reaches into his pocket.Laura is thinking one of two things: he is going to stab me to death, or he is going to shoot me to death. She begins to retreat. Rapidly."Wait, I have something for you.""I don't want it. Thanks." She starts walking away."I don't normally do this, but, here's my card. Why don't you give me a call? We can go out."Laura starts to laugh. She takes the card.IT reads (and this is a quote):Gentalthug (spelled this way)his namehis phone numberhis MySpace"You don't usually do this, but you have business cards?""Yeah. Well, give me a call.""I'll do that."Laura walks away from the Gentalthug. She couldn't have been 50 feet away before he approached another woman. Whatever works, I su... More About: Harmony , Single , Bone , Tale
Single Gal Biceps, part 1
2008-05-24 00:29:00 Hello everyone,I've had a splendid day. And you?I saw my surgeon. Scheduled surgery for my shoulder on June 11.I so do not want to do this, I can't tell you.I curse the woman who hit me with her car last summer.I know it was an accident, but !%#%@#. Okay, I'll say it -- FUCK!With the surgery scheduling comes the panic of -- how am I going to take care of myself? Get around? I cannot drive for 6 weeks. THIS is the time when it super seriously sucks to be single.I tell you.Below is a story my pal Shelby Lee Jenkins (a single gal herself) wrote about developing and using her Single Gal Biceps . My upcoming surgery will help me develop my single gal bicep (singular, I can't use my left arm). Exerpt reprinted here with her permission. Enjoy!-- The Single GalSINGLE GAL BICEPS(c) 2008, Shelby Lee JenkinsI am a single female living in LA and I believe the best part about being single, is having Single Girl Biceps. For those of you who are not single and have no clue what I am tal... More About: Part
Daisy's photo shoot
2008-05-23 02:39:00 Hi folks,This has been a super crap crap week in my world.Hope yours hasn't been as bad as mine.I don't feel like writing about it, so instead I'll distract you (and myself) with some lovely photos my friend Teresa took at the dog park a few weeks ago. The black dog -- my roommate, the lovely Daisy. The Golden -- Teresa's dog Willow.Enjoy! More About: Photo , Photo Shoot , Shoot
The Tale of A(nother) Single Gal
2008-05-20 02:37:00 My single gal pal Shannon was in a car accident (yeah, I know, but it's not mine, ok?) last week. Here is her recount of the accident:What happened: I was stopped on Layfette Highway. There was a car full of farmworkers in front of me, who had stopped. Honestly, we were waiting a while...like a good 4 cars had passed in that lane...when all of a sudden out of nowhere, I was hit from behind by a semi. The point of impact was the left side of the trunk, which caused the entire trunk to crunch in and all his roofing supplies flew in to my back window-luckily they lodged into the base of the window and the trunk and not my head-then he turned right really fast and hit the front of my car, which caused me to spin...so that tore up the entire front...and the back...the tires...and my side of the car. He said he didn't see us stopped and then he couldn't stop in time.I was hit, I said outloud: WHAT THE HECK!? (truly...no swears...not even in a crisis) and then all of a sudden I s... More About: Single , Tale
I had waaaaay too much wine.
2008-05-19 01:38:00 I have a story to tell today. A story of a drunken evening and a dance back into my early 20s.Believe me, it's rare that I have anything exciting to tell about my personal life these days, so there's fodder for a juicy blog post. And I could get into details and mention scandalous words and see the sitemeter on my blog go nuts.However.My father reads my blog. My friends. Colleagues and a million other randoms.So, I'm having a sort of internal ethical blog debate. How much do I reveal of this incident? Of others? At what cost? To myself? To other people? Where do we draw the curtains on the false familiarity of cyberspace? Not everyone needs to know everything about everyone else.Right?UmRight?As I sat down to write today, I debated and debated about what to write. Although I may have appeared to be in my early 20s last evening, I am not, and with my maturity comes a cautious protectiveness of my privacy.So, gentle reader, you will not get details, and I will leave my S... More About: Wine
Bouncing things annoy me
2008-05-15 03:17:00 When I was in undergraduate school, I lived across the hall from two lovely chaps -- Paul and Scott. During the course of our freshman year, Paul got weirder, Scott came out, and my roommate, Jenel, and I tried desperately to stay out of their room.Because it smelled bad.The chaps never did their laundry, so it mildewed and molded and stunk to high heaven. I remember standing in the middle of their room (they weren't there -- I broke in somehow) with a bottle of Lysol and spraying (the whole thing) in an attempt to cleanse the hallway of the scent. Um, gross.Scott and Paul were generally great neighbors. They were kind, funny, and were willing to sit around and play music / talk about art with me. They shared candy. I liked them.Most of the time.When he was stressed, Scott used to stand in the hallway between our room and his in his boxers and juggle pins. This often happened during mid-terms. At night. When procrastination could no longer be a friend. You know the time...So Sco... More About: Things
A leaf! A leaf! and other random things...
2008-05-14 04:19:00 I spied with my naked (is that the right part of this saying?) eye...a budding leaf on the hedge in front of my house.It is a glorious day in hedge land...The hedge! It regroweth.In other news...last week I went out on two dates with two different people.Both lovely. Both times I left with a "let's do it again" ending.And, several days later...Neither have called.Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever.In other other news...I haven't slept well for several days. I don't know why.Perhaps this is why the random things are pouring out today.In other other other news...I made some super tasty gluten free muffins today. Ever since I have been gluten free (three years now) my health has improved significantly. But, since I come from an ancestral line of bakers (my family still owns a bakery in Sedlice U Blatne, Czech Republic, thank you very much) and I love me some bread, giving up gluten was not easy. Most of the gluten free products on the market suck the big one. The breads are especially... More About: Random , Leaf , Things
Um...
2008-05-13 02:58:00 I found out today that I need surgery on my elbow as well as my shoulder as a result of the lovely car accident from last summer.The thing that super sucks is that the surgeries cannot be done at the same time.I've done fairly well maintaining my sanity during this year of hell. But, I have to admit, my attitude really blows right now. And, I'm sure my friends are completely sick of me complaining all of the time.I need a new topic of conversation....So, today I will rant on the car accident nightmare and it will be the last post on this topic in May (I promise! -- wait, do I hear applause?)...Thus, I share this...Why being injured in a car accident blows chunks:1. you have to go to the doctor 84 times a week2. none of your doctors talk to each other so you have to tell them everything everyone else already knows. 3. the insurance company employees are assholes4. you have to hire a lawyer because of 35. you don't get jack for pain and suffering because of 46. after the initial ...
Of a good and bad weekend...
2008-05-12 05:09:00 I've had a mildly entertaining weekend. Since this was the first time in about a month I haven't been hocking up a lung, it was nice to get out and actually do something.The somethings:1. I worked yesterday. Which sucked. Three hour meeting. People yelled at each other. I tried to calm them down.2. I went to Ikea. I bought some lawn furniture. I ate some meatballs. It was good.3. I went on a date. It was also good. 4. I tried to put together my Ikea lawn furniture. It was not so good.Okay.Usually I feel like a bad ass when I put together Ikea crap HOWEVER, this time I decided Ikea was an ass.In general.So I'm using the allen wrench. Sweating up a storm, builting things, feeling good. I'm done with one chair. I'm done with the second chair.I'm done with the table. Then came the fucking bench.The.Fucking.Bench.The pieces would not fit together.And, truly, this was not my fault.(Well, it might have been, but I blame the fuckers at Ikea)So I screamed.Scared the dog.... More About: Weekend , Good
I have entrepreneureal (but not spelling) skillz
2008-05-09 01:43:00 I like making shit up. Like... brainstorming ideas for household inventions that someone should create, build, market and sell. I'd do it myself and rake in all of the cash, but, you know, the thing is, I have no engineering skillz, I'm slightly lazy, and my arm hurts, so even though I conjure up some brilliant ideas, they are going nowhere. Fast.And I complain that I need more money...Today's invention has to do with a semi-monthly task I loathe with all of my being.Clipping Daisy's toenails.They are long.Really long.Clawish freaky Guinness Book of World Record long.Embarrassingly I am a horrible pet owner long.And the disclaimer...But, you see, I am incapable of doing them myself. As several vets have written on her chart notes, Daisy is: "too wiggly." I cannot hold her and clip. I cannot hold her period. So... she will not stand still for the toenail clipping. It takes about 45 people to hold her down, and then she cries the whole time.Heart wrenching.I can't stand ... More About: Spelling , Skillz
Why I need a chainsaw...
2008-05-06 05:13:00 When you own a house, you need to buy a lot of shit that you never thought of owning when you live in an apartment. Like: a rake, shovel, dog crap scooper, an awl (what the hell is an awl)... you know, shit like that.Well, friends, I've decided I need a chainsaw.Let's discuss the many uses of said chainsaw:1. Chop down ugly ass hedges.2. Chop down dead arborvitae (of which I have um three)3. Cut up fallen tree branches to burn in the fireplace4. Saw up wood for projects (what they are I don't know, but wouldn't it be fun to cut stuff?)and5. AmputationThat's right, I said: amputation.I've had enough of my left arm, friends. Enough. My injuries from last summer's car accident become more irritating / painful / frustrating / pick your adjective by the day and I've had enough.I want to chop it off.I saw a new doctor last week (who I loved, by the way) who said -- yes, you need surgery, your arm is currently dislocated and unstable and we need to go in ASAP. I sighed. ... More About: Chainsaw
Just let me sleep in...
2008-05-03 16:30:00 It's 7:30 a.m. on a Saturday. I've been up for an hour. I find this criminal. I am tired and needed a sleep-in this morning. It did not happen.My lovely roommate, Daisy, decided she needed to have breakfast at her usual time (6:30 a.m.) and wouldn't take no for an answer. Instead, she paced around my bed (and yes, I need to cut her toenails -- they click like mad on my wood floors) and kept pressing her nose on the side of the mattress.In other words, she woke me up.Early.On a Saturday.Grrrrumble.Of course, I could just stop bitching (pun intended) and go back to bed. But, unfortunately, I don't function that way. Once I'm up, I'm up.I get it -- she was hungry. She needed to go outside. But, I have to admit, I wish there was a doggy sleep in remedy. Could I train her to sleep in on specific days? I wonder if I should invent something... people would buy it, right?Hope you are enjoying your weekend.--The Single Gal More About: Sleep
Hedge anxiety
2008-05-02 02:01:00 The hedge in front of my house is the bane of my existence.Truly.For most of the time I have lived here, I fretted about the overgrowth of said hedge, and how its gnarly viney leafy ugliness was reflecting on me as the new kid in the 'hood. And, truth be told, my neat freakness OCD started perking up every time I drove into the driveway or looked out the window. I tell you, the thing was that bad... or I need some serious psychiatric help... or maybe a combo.Anyway...About a month ago the hedge got a big ass haircut. It is no longer overgrown. Due to the over zealousness of my hedge chopping crew, all signs of leaf and limb were shorn to the roots. And now, my friends, I am nearly certain that the hedge, by my best estimationisDEAD.Dead, I tell you. Look... an actual unretouched photograph...So, of course, I have a whole lotta new hedge anxiety. Of the crap it's dead what do I do variety...Many of my friends (and a few of them are landscapers) have assured me that there is no way ... More About: Anxiety , Hedge
Tagged
2008-04-27 22:16:00 Hello everyone, I've been tagged by the lovely MissE of Adelaide, Australia, denizen of the "Waving from the Edges" blog to do this book meme...Here is the task:1. Pick up nearest book2. Open to page 1233. Find 5th sentence4. Post next 3 sentences5. Tag 5 peopleThe book nearest to me is: The Tao of Teaching: The Ageless Wisdom of Taoism and the Art of Teaching by Greta Nagel, Ph.D."Do what your insight tells you to do in terms of helping students to experience learning. Maria believes that the more her students read and the more they know about interesting subjects, the better they will be able to perform on tests. She makes one part of her program synchronize specifically with the standardized tests, and that is to have the kids come up with sample test questions each day." (pg. 123)I tag: (names deleted... but you know who you are). (You can post your tag on the "comments" section of my blog, if you'd like). Even if you don't think you are named, participate anyway...Interest... More About: Tagged
I get by with a little help from my friends...
2008-04-26 02:19:00 I have to admit, one of my biggest fears is to die at home, alone. And, because I am alone, no one notices I'm gone, and Daisy eats me as a midnight snack before anyone finds me. Disgusting? I know, but it happens, and I really do not want it to happen to me. As I've been lying on my couch this week nursing the Pammy Plague, there have been times when I've thought my lung was going to explode or some other malady would happen and there I would be, dead and rotting by the end of the week. Well, I have to say, even though I am single and (sniff sniff) seemingly alone in the world, during this illness I have been reassured that there are a lot of people out there who would notice if I kicked the bucket (in a timely fashion) and will help me if I need it. There have been several friends who've checked in on me during the week, others who have offered to bring me food or other assorted joys, and then there is my dear friend Taryn, who actually did this:That's right, fri... More About: Friends
You know...
2008-04-24 21:40:00 I could start feeling better any time. Annnny time, thank you very much.I really hate being sick.
L.L. Crap J.
2008-04-24 02:18:00 I know the entire daily line up of the CW station in Seattle. I watch the judge shows, I watch the talk shows, I watch the sitcoms and reality shows. For hours... for weeks...I'm generally not a big TV watcher, but thus far, 2008 has brought me closer to my couch by servin' up a one-two punch of plagueries.I've been sick.A lot.A freakin' hell of a lot.And, sadly, at the beginning of the year, I made a New Year's Resolution to avoid taking antibiotics for the whole year.Well...Let's recap this Single Gal's plagues thus far this year, shall we?ILLNESS #1: THE FINNISH DEATH PLAGUEA lovely plague of dizziness, fever, chills, coughing, sneezing which was passed on to me during an 11 hour flight from Germany to the US.As a result of the plague, I missed about a week and a half of work (and it should have been more.)I thought I'd be fine if I rested, drank fluids, blah blah, but because my body sucks, while I was at home, I caughtILLNESS #1a: THE PLAGUE OF THE LUNGAKA bronchitis... More About: Crap
La cucaracha
2008-04-23 01:33:00 I caught some sort of cold/flu/plague while I was in Iowa visiting my parents. I'm so angry about it, I can barely write.I blame my mother.I'm on vacation and I'm sick.What a rip off.As I've been laying around my house the last couple of days, I've been brainstorming about all of the magnificent home projects I want to do when I win the PowerBall: new windows, add a bathroom, redo the kitchen, create a proper laundry room...laundry -- oh, crap -- and then I remembered I left wet laundry in the washing machine.My washer and dryer are currently in the garage. Stylish, I know...I lumber outside, laundry basket in hand, ready to do the switch over, and I see it -- a freaking cockroach. A DEAD cockroach lying on the floor of my garage. Holy crap.Nooooooooooo! All I need is another freakin' infestation in my house.I've had a couple of previous experiences with cockroaches in my life...FLASHBACKThe first -- occurred when I was a senior in college (paying $175 / month for rent, thank...
A photo tour of THE BIG CITY
2008-04-21 03:02:00 Yesterday my father, my brother (The Fruits -- yes, that's his real nickname) and I went on a walking tour of Des Moines, Iowa (aka the BIG CITY). Here they are in their traipsing glory.On our walk, we broke into Sec Taylor Stadium, home of the Iowa Cubs and the hot dog gun. Yep, friends, in addition to t-shirts and other crap, they shoot foiled wrapped hot dogs into the audience. People eat them. I have seen it with my own eyes. This is the Iowa Capitol building. It is a really amazing place. The dome is made of gold leaf and you can go up into the dome on the inside of the building. About 10 years ago, Fruits and I walked around the building without being stopped or asked what we were doing. We tried to replicate our hijinks, but the door was locked.Another dramatic angle of the dome. And the trains. My dad likes trains. Here are some train tracks. Here is one of the many train bridges. This crosses the Raccoon River (I think, it might be the Des Moines River). This i... More About: Photo , Tour , City
Random photo tour of my parents' computer
2008-04-18 16:34:00 Greetings, friends...I'm currently in Iowa at the family homestead. I'm here until Sunday to take care of my mother post-surgery. I borrowed my father's car today so I can cart her around to the doctor, pharmacy, blah blah.Good times.Have I mentioned my mother doesn't drive?Never has, never will.Oh, so much more on this topic at a later time... it has scarred me for life.Ok, one quick story regarding the mother not driving situation... I was 5. In Kindergarten. I had a headache and the nurse sent me home. A cab came for me at school, and I had to ride home BY MYSELF in a cab. At age 5.Scarred, I tell you.Tra la la.So here are some photos I'm snaggletoothing from my parents' computer... they'll be up until my brother finds out his daughter is on the internet and / or my parents freak out and make me take the post down. You just never know with these people...My, my I'm depicting them as insane freaks. They are not, generally. My parents are good people, just a little quirky.Y... More About: Photo , Computer , Random , Tour , Parents
On hedge haircuts and cool ass treasures...
2008-04-16 01:56:00 Hello everyone,Yeah, yeah, yeah, I haven't updated my blog in awhile. It's been a challenging few weeks both personally and professionally, so I've been laying low.All is generally well, though, and today life is especially fabulous. I'm happy to report I'm on vacation until April 27. Hooray!I'm spending part of my vacation in Iowa, visiting my dad and my ailing (but getting better) momma. I don't necessarily consider going to Iowa a vacation, but I'm sucking it up. My mother's been through hell this year.My brother and his wife have had a rough go of it lately as well. Their newborn daughter, beautiful little Charlotte, is struggling with several pretty large health problems. She had a tracheotomy last week, and will be in the hospital for another 2 - 3 weeks. My brother and sister-in-law are the most organized and practical people I know, so they are taking this all in stride. But it can't be easy. They have a lot to learn and deal with. In anticipation of my trip, I spe... More About: Cool , Haircuts , Hedge , Treasures
What the...?
2008-03-29 17:11:00 This has been a bizarre week.My mother went into the hospital last Thursday to reattach things... she had surgery for diverticulitis in October and had some of her intestines and her colon removed. This surgery lasted for 2 hours longer than it was meant to, and her immediate recovery was not progressing as quickly as the doctors hoped.She was in the hospital for about a week, and things seem to be going well now. I'm happy to announce that she is home now and doing well.My niece was born on Tuesday. My sister-in-law had a really difficult labor and ended up having a c-section. She is doing okay now (physically) and will be released from the hospital on Sunday.My niece, however, is still struggling with some medical issues. I don't know details (my brother and his wife are being very private about this), but she is in the ICU and is dealing with some serious problems.I am amazed, being an aunt for the first time, how worried I am about her, and how much love I have for this chil...
I'm an aunt!
2008-03-26 06:05:00 I am pleased to announce the birth of my brother's first child, Charlotte. She was born this evening after 24+ hour labor and a C-section (my poor sister-in-law).I am very excited to be an aunt (it's my first time) and I'm thrilled for my brother and my parents.More later...Hope you are all well.
The Single Gal goes to (another) wedding
2008-03-24 03:36:00 The wedding this weekend was truly lovely. I have to admit that due to recent (medical) events I was a little grumpy about driving down to Oregon, but I sucked it up, traffic wasn't bad, and even if it was, I wouldn't have missed this wedding for the world; I had a spectacular time.And I did not have a date.I have gone solo to many weddings. Swingin' it on the solo side forces you to talk to people and I love meeting new people. A good thing, in my book.Of course, there were hilarious self-imposed debacles over the course of the weekend. Let me bust them out...1. I brought my dog with me to Oregon because I have begged too many people to dog sit for me in the past 3 months and I was too lazy to take Daisy to get her kennel shot. Therefore, with Daisy in tow, I got to stay not in the deluxe and fab locale of the wedding, but in lovely Travelodge. Which was surrounded by barbed wire. Daisy didn't like the Travelodge. She paced constantly, and if I left the room for one se... More About: Wedding , Single
Some photos of the backyard
More articles from this author:2008-03-20 02:28:00 I got some really bad / annoying / frustrating news about my shoulder yesterday and I have resorted to shopping therapy and art making therapy... that is, until I figure out what to do next. What an ordeal... I hate car accidents.So, yeah, I need to mow my lawn and rake the leaves and cut the fucking hedge... but instead I bought a new camera and took some photos of my lawn in its glorious disarray.And the photos.Daisy in action...A sign of spring...My new bamboo windchimes... does this mean I'm zen?A lilac bush pre-bloom...I like my new camera. Here's hoping you are well.-- The Single Gal More About: Photos , Backyard 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 |
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