JankasphereJankasphereTo All Who Loves Me, I Love You Too. To All Who Hates Me, I Hate You More. To All My Subscribers, Continue Your Support, To All My Detractors, Just Commit Suicide. Articles
Red Mango
2008-04-18 08:46:00 I'm so totally loving this red purse from Mango ! It's poshness is so powerful, it drives in more chicness in me! Awoo Awoo! I wanna have this... now!Advertise Here
A Girl's Gay Bestfriend
2008-04-18 06:45:00 Chris Crocker's sermon! Hear, hear!Advertise Here More About: Tube
Queen Elizabeth II Useless "Facts"
2008-04-18 06:33:00 Disclaimer: These facts are still to be proven.Fast Facts :The Queen is a direct descendant of the first Dalai Lama.The Queen holds a summit every year. The summit is held for no particular reason.According to Reuters, the Queen has 10 times the lifespan of workers and lays up to 2,000 eggs a day.The Queen is supreme ruler of Milton Keynes, a job so unpleasent that no-one else would take it.The Queen is the secret Supreme Ruler of the 7 Galaxies and official President of the United Lolz Asssociation.The Queen likes all people!-(Except for Diana, Princess of Wales, and Dodi Al-Fayed!)The Queen is a cousin of Harry Potter.She is a closet lesbian.She likes in her spare time to walk in circle reciting the lines of the Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe over and over again.All of her potted plants are called SteveStarred in movie "The Queen" as Helen Mirren.She auditioned for Calander GirlsShe was born with two headsShe had implantsShe recently left her lesbian loverApperently she blinks si... More About: Queen Elizabeth , Elizabeth , Useless
Block the Sun!
2008-04-18 05:26:00 It's summer (here in the Philippines), and the weather is so damn hot! People get icky yucky oily, almost up to the point that they can deep fry chicken in their forehead!I just hate the sun, when I was still a kid (cute as ever), I got these allergies or something on my arms which looks like small white dots and were so itchy! Eeew! My dermatologist told me that I got this condition called Polymorphous Light Eruption (PMLE); in english, hypersensitivity to the sun. So, after those traumatic experiences with my PMLE, I avoided the sun. That's why I hate summer!But now, during my not-a-girl-not-yet-a-woman stage, you can't blame me if I want to go to the beach wearing my tight bikini and showing off my oh so gorgeous body. So I went to the Hawaiian Tropic website and look for the perfect sunscreen that I should be wearing during my bitchy beach trips.For everyday sunscreen protection, Hawaiian Tropic Oil-Free Faces Lotion ... More About: Block
Bikini Pants: Freaky!
2008-04-17 15:36:00 From the makers of Havaianas, Gisele Bündchen, Pubic Hair Waxing; comes a not-so-conservative pair of jeans: the Bikini Pants !When I first saw this "thing", I remembered Britney concerts back in the days, then I came back to reality and realized this thingy is freaky! I wonder what it looks like on the backside... hmmm...Well, there's more to expect from the Brazilians in the coming years!P.S. Brazilians do have *hot* models... scorching!Advertise Here More About: Freaky
From now on... no more taglish!
2008-04-17 09:33:00 I swear I won't! I would make tigil na of posting taglish here in Jankasphere! Ok... I would start NOW! I've thought of this idea 'coz I've been thinking of expanding my blog internationally. Posting tagalog words would confuse foreign readers and then eventually hating my blog 'coz they can't understand a thing. I myself don't like reading Korean, Japanese, and other funny looking languages 'coz I can't understand what they're talking about!Watch out for the newest Jankasphere! Coming at 'ya live, worldwide!Advertise Here
GMA's Upcoming Show: Dyesebel
2008-04-15 21:59:00 After the not-so-sikat show called Marimar polluted the TV Screens (mostly yung mga sinuhulang ng GMA through AGB Neilsen), Marian Rivera the self-proclaimed Primetime Superstar is currently busy on doing her new soap opera, Dyesebel, a remake. Because the GMA producers can't think of new ideas, they thought of remaking the classic Filipino movie Dyesebel. The producers never thought twice of casting Marian Rivera for the lead role; Habang "sikat" pa ang artista, kunin nyo na! GMA has once again made another stinky show. Dyesebel, a flop in the making.Technorati Tags:dyesebel, marian rivera, gma More About: Show
The Diva Rises From Hibernation!
2008-04-15 18:08:00 Whew! I've been underground these past few months kasi naman i've been so busy! You know naman, in demand ang beauty ko!Kung ano ang mga ginawa ko within my absence, it's none of your business. So, 'wag nang gawing issue coz i'm so sick na of intrigas. But because I'm so mabait, and I want you naman to be updated with my life, i'm gonna share few bits and crannies of what I did recently.1] I was able to watch the quite funny but super touching indie film, Transamerica. It talks about a transgender (or popularly known as tranny) and his/her son. Basta, just watch nalang the movie, I'm not good kasi in writing a synopsis eh... It stars Felicity Huffman as Bree the Tranny; and the super **hott** Kevin Zegers as Toby the Tranny's Son. (*Parental Guidance is advised in watching this film, it contains some bits of b*llz, a*s, and t*ts)2] StudyAnd that's it! Don't you get it?! My life was boring these past few weeks and I KNOW IT! Anyway, things would change coz IT'S SUMMAH! More About: Hibernation
Oshomoto: A Janka & Oshomoto Collaboration
2008-03-09 11:50:00 I've been busy these past few days because of the so many projects na nakatambak. OMG, sana matapos ko lahat. Anyway, Oshomoto contacted me last night asking me to help her publicize her blog. And so I did, mabait naman ako eh. So, here's "our" blog: More About: Collaboration
My Secret Ambition
2008-02-10 15:16:00 Since I was a kid, I've always been beautiful. Super like ko talaga ang modeling and I'm sure na overqualified ako. I'm 5'10", quite skinny (but not to the point na mukhang anorexic), edgy, pang-supermodel look (I'm half Belgian kasi noh), and oh so gorgeous. I almost thought of submitting my portfolio to some designers and agencies pero I realized something:Fashion is really a pain in the a*s. More About: Secret
The Devil Wears Prada... Pinoy Version?!
2008-02-09 12:54:00 There had been chismis na kumakalat sa PEx that the award-winning Hollywood film The Devil Wears Prada eh ire-remake ng ABS-CBN. Ayon sa mga not-so-reliable-sources-from-PEx, Anne Curtis would play the role of the bida. Hmm, I'm not so sure 'bout this. Come to think of it, isang super blockbuster Hollywood film, ire-remake lang ng isang Local broadcasting station?! Urgh.. Well, kung totoo nga ang chismis, then what would be the appropriate title for the teleserye?Kung si Direk Loren Dyogi, the notorious director of the super jologs show Pinoy Big Brother and Pinoy Dream Academy ang magiging director, then I think ang magiging title ng teleserye is: Pinoy Devil Wears Prada. Almost lahat kasi ng shows nya eh may prefix na Pinoy.Kung si Kris Aquino naman ang magiging bida instead of Anne Curtis, the show would be entitled: The Devil Wears San-San. She's the endorser kasi of San-San, a cosmetic product that is usually used by the people below poverty line.Kung si Wendy Valdez, a skan...
Pokemon #623
2008-02-05 15:00:00 MariMaw, I choose you!MariMaw - Marimar na BakulawSpecial Abilities:+ Super Boldstar Pose - kaya nyang akitin ang mga manyak sa kanto.+ Sayaw G.R.O. - kapag gumiling na sya na parang GRO, ang lahat ng tao magiging ngo-ngo. (except me noh!)+ Super Sigaw - kaya niyang pabagsakin ang mga buildings kapag sumigaw sya nang: MariMaw, AW! More About: Pokemon
Pokemon #623
2008-02-05 15:00:00 MariMaw, I choose you!MariMaw - Marimar na BakulawSpecial Abilities:+ Super Boldstar Pose - kaya nyang akitin ang mga manyak sa kanto.+ Sayaw G.R.O. - kapag gumiling na sya na parang GRO, ang lahat ng tao magiging ngo-ngo. (except me noh!)+ Super Sigaw - kaya niyang pabagsakin ang mga buildings kapag sumigaw sya nang: MariMaw, AW! More About: Pokemon
Janka's San Miguel Beer Commerical
2008-02-05 07:16:00 i use beer...the world watches...my every move...my hair...my clothes...my look...i like black...black looks good...looking good means no dandruff...beer means no dandruff...i trust beer...dandruff never comes back..........it's gonna rain... More About: Beer , Miguel
Janka's San Miguel Beer Commerical
2008-02-05 07:16:00 i use beer...the world watches...my every move...my hair...my clothes...my look...i like black...black looks good...looking good means no dandruff...beer means no dandruff...i trust beer...dandruff never comes back..........it's gonna rain... More About: Beer
Virus Attack!
2008-02-04 11:37:00 Argh! Grrr! I'm really super pissed off right now kasi my laptop is infested by some bloody viruses! Arrrggh! My sister kasi made hiram my laptop for her report at her school, then my gaga sister did something I do not know then **poof**, parang zoo na ang laptop ko; puno na ng crazy viruses mostly Trojans pa! Gosh! And when I arrived kanina, she said: "Ate, your laptop was acting crazy kanina, hmm.. Thanks pala for letting me borrow it.", and I was like super tulala! It took me 2 hours para linisin ang laptop ko, and I was so happy coz hindi na na-resort into reformatting the system. I have so many important files pa naman there na hindi ko pa na-transfer sa PC ko. Urgh!Sana, all those Virus programmers would have amnesia and make limot on how to make viruses! I hate you Virus Programmers! I hate you more than Marian Rivera! Argh!
Virus Attack!
2008-02-04 11:37:00 Argh! Grrr! I'm really super pissed off right now kasi my laptop is infested by some bloody viruses! Arrrggh! My sister kasi made hiram my laptop for her report at her school, then my gaga sister did something I do not know then **poof**, parang zoo na ang laptop ko; puno na ng crazy viruses mostly Trojans pa! Gosh! And when I arrived kanina, she said: "Ate, your laptop was acting crazy kanina, hmm.. Thanks pala for letting me borrow it.", and I was like super tulala! It took me 2 hours para linisin ang laptop ko, and I was so happy coz hindi na na-resort into reformatting the system. I have so many important files pa naman there na hindi ko pa na-transfer sa PC ko. Urgh!Sana, all those Virus programmers would have amnesia and make limot on how to make viruses! I hate you Virus Programmers! I hate you more than Marian Rivera! Argh! More About: Attack
My Schedule
2008-02-03 14:01:00 I am a super busy person, I do sobrang daming things everyday! So here's my schedule for tomorrow; pwede nyong i-try 'tong sched ko para naman ma-experience nyo ang glamorous life ko!MONDAY9:oo AM - 9:10 AM -- I wake up.9:10 AM - 9:20 AM -- I brush my teeth with Fluocaril, a dentist prescribed toothpaste to help prevent cavities and keep my mouth fresh all day!9:20 AM - 10:00 AM -- I eat breakfast. Ang menu for Monday is: 1 bowl of Cornflakes, 1 bowl of my fave cereal (Strawberry Flavour), 3 slices of Bacon, 1 fried Egg, 1/2 cup of Mashed Potato, and 2 glasses of Fresh Milk.10:00 AM - 10:45 AM -- I choose my outfit for the day with the help of my Yaya Puring. She's the one kasi who would dig in through my closet full of clothes.10:45 AM - 11:00 AM -- I start my bathing. I shampoo then condition my hair.11:00 AM - 11:25 AM -- I take care of my face. First, I exfoliate my face using St. Ives Apricot Scrub. Second, I cleanse my face using Mario Badescu's Enzyme Cleansing Gel. Thir... More About: Schedule
My Schedule
2008-02-03 14:01:00 I am a super busy person, I do sobrang daming things everyday! So here's my schedule for tomorrow; pwede nyong i-try 'tong sched ko para naman ma-experience nyo ang glamorous life ko!MONDAY9:oo AM - 9:10 AM -- I wake up.9:10 AM - 9:20 AM -- I brush my teeth with Fluocaril, a dentist prescribed toothpaste to help prevent cavities and keep my mouth fresh all day!9:20 AM - 10:00 AM -- I eat breakfast. Ang menu for Monday is: 1 bowl of Cornflakes, 1 bowl of my fave cereal (Strawberry Flavour), 3 slices of Bacon, 1 fried Egg, 1/2 cup of Mashed Potato, and 2 glasses of Fresh Milk.10:00 AM - 10:45 AM -- I choose my outfit for the day with the help of my Yaya Puring. She's the one kasi who would dig in through my closet full of clothes.10:45 AM - 11:00 AM -- I start my bathing. I shampoo then condition my hair.11:00 AM - 11:25 AM -- I take care of my face. First, I exfoliate my face using St. Ives Apricot Scrub. Second, I cleanse my face using Mario Badescu's Enzyme Cleansing Gel. Thir... More About: Schedule
If I'm The President (Part 2)
2008-01-30 06:40:00 Hey guys! Here's my second take on what I would do when I would be the President of the Philippines!- I will make kuha Sabah and put it as part of the Philippines where it really belongs. Pero hindi ko isasama the terrorists who are living there. I will also slap the President of China para matauhan siya and give Spratley Islands back to the Philippines.- I will conquer Taiwan and bring it closer to the Philippines. Para naman dumami ang mga Chinito here in the country.- I will make delete the Phil. Constitution and I would declare myself Queen of the Philippines. I will be called Her Royal Majesty Janka, Queen of Philippines, Sabah, Taiwan, and Spratley Islands.- I will change the flag into my own design:- Every family will be given a mansion, but sa mga hindi nabigyan, they will be sent to Iraq and would wait for further instructions.- To help reduce traffic, nobody is allowed to use cars, or any transport vehicle. Except for me. I'm the Queen remember?!- All my detractors would... More About: Part , The President
If I'm The President (Part 2)
2008-01-30 06:40:00 Hey guys! Here's my second take on what I would do when I would be the President of the Philippines!- I will make kuha Sabah and put it as part of the Philippines where it really belongs. Pero hindi ko isasama the terrorists who are living there. I will also slap the President of China para matauhan siya and give Spratley Islands back to the Philippines.- I will conquer Taiwan and bring it closer to the Philippines. Para naman dumami ang mga Chinito here in the country.- I will make delete the Phil. Constitution and I would declare myself Queen of the Philippines. I will be called Her Royal Majesty Janka, Queen of Philippines, Sabah, Taiwan, and Spratley Islands.- I will change the Philippine National Flag into my own design:- Every family will be given a mansion, but sa mga hindi nabigyan, they will be sent to Iraq and would wait for further instructions.- To help reduce traffic, nobody is allowed to use cars, or any transport vehicle. Except for me. I'm the Queen remember?!- All... More About: Part
Jankasphere Tops Google Charts!
2008-01-29 16:58:00 Top Keywords:1. Smelly Bumbay2. Marimar Zit-Face3. Kadiri Nurses4. Jologs Girl5. Funny Gay Guy More About: Google , Tops , Charts
Janka's List: Stupid TV Shows
2008-01-29 16:37:00 1. Zaido - Certified Stupid 2. Remi - Horribly Ugly3. Marimar - Chipipay Boldstarlet4. Whammy - A Gay and a Retokada Host5. Daisy Siete - A Show For Katulongs6. Wowowee - A Stereotype of Hungry Squatters7. Eat Bulaga - Boring. More About: List
Janka's List: Stupid TV Shows
2008-01-29 16:37:00 1. Zaido - Certified Stupid 2. Remi - Horribly Ugly3. Marimar - Chipipay Boldstarlet4. Whammy - A Gay and a Retokada Host5. Daisy Siete - A Show For Katulongs6. Wowowee - A Stereotype of Hungry Squatters7. Eat Bulaga - Boring. More About: List
Ugly Betty, The Prettiest Butt-Face!
2008-01-29 16:09:00 Almost lahat kayo knows that I'm a real fan of the US TV show called Ugly Betty ! It's really funny and it's quite heartwarming rin.. (Take note.. I have an organ called heart).Betty Suarez - Betty is really super funny and super nice. But when I look at her, naaalala ko ang classmate ko na oh so jologs and also has a bushy eyebrow! Yikes! But my classmate looks much worse! Grabe, I feel depressed when I look at her (my classmate), parang she finished her labada.. Super losyang! Good thing she stopped studying.Daniel Meade - Gosh, he's quite hot. Well, nakakaturn-off lang ang pagiging Sex Addict nya. But he's hott parin.Marc St. James - He's super funny super GAY! I don't like gays who are like always in the parlor looking so losyang and so tired being a hooker, but I love Marc.. he's so urgh!Amanda Tanen - Marc's partner in crime.. I like her bitchiness.. She's great.. I think her character is based on me.. Haha!Wilhelmina Slater - the Queen of the Bitches of Mode Magazine... More About: Face , Butt
Ugly Betty, The Prettiest Butt-Face!
2008-01-29 16:09:00 Almost lahat kayo knows that I'm a real fan of the US TV show called Ugly Betty ! It's really funny and it's quite heartwarming rin.. (Take note.. I have an organ called heart).Betty Suarez - Betty is really super funny and super nice. But when I look at her, naaalala ko ang classmate ko na oh so jologs and also has a bushy eyebrow! Yikes! But my classmate looks much worse! Grabe, I feel depressed when I look at her (my classmate), parang she finished her labada.. Super losyang! Good thing she stopped studying.Daniel Meade - Gosh, he's quite hot. Well, nakakaturn-off lang ang pagiging Sex Addict nya. But he's hott parin.Marc St. James - He's super funny super GAY! I don't like gays who are like always in the parlor looking so losyang and so tired being a hooker, but I love Marc.. he's so urgh!Amanda Tanen - Marc's partner in crime.. I like her bitchiness.. She's great.. I think her character is based on me.. Haha!Wilhelmina Slater - the Queen of the Bitches of Mode Magazine... More About: Face
My New Louis Vuitton Wallet!
2008-01-29 15:27:00 OMG! I'm so super happy coz dumating na my brand new Louis Vuitton wallet na inorder ko galing France! Gosh it's so posh!I ordered it about 2 weeks ago and now, it's here! Gosh3x.. I'm really ecstatic! I'm like gonna go gaga when it arrived, it felt like my first time.. first time in having a bite from a Kobe Beef Burger! Whew!To all my detractors, FYI, my Louis Vuitton Wallet is not fake noh! Baka you'll make tsismis naman to your kapitbahays there beside the riles ng tren that I own a fake LV! Eeew! Parang i'm gonna lose my apetite talaga when I make rinig people who are bragging about their LV's or other Luxury Items that are super fake sa unang tingin pa lang! Well, i'm gonna give you guys some tips in making sure that your Louis Vuitton is authentic (kahit you can't afford it.. pity!):1. If you buy your LV at a tiangge or at the streets specifically Uyanguren in Davao or Divisoria in Manila, it's FAKE! Duh, Louis Vuitton do not sell their items on some chipipay tiang...
My New Louis Vuitton Wallet!
2008-01-29 15:27:00 OMG! I'm so super happy coz dumating na my brand new Louis Vuitton wallet na inorder ko galing France! Gosh it's so posh!I ordered it about 2 weeks ago and now, it's here! Gosh3x.. I'm really ecstatic! I'm like gonna go gaga when it arrived, it felt like my first time.. first time in having a bite from a Kobe Beef Burger! Whew!To all my detractors, FYI, my Louis Vuitton Wallet is not fake noh! Baka you'll make tsismis naman to your kapitbahays there beside the riles ng tren that I own a fake LV! Eeew! Parang i'm gonna lose my apetite talaga when I make rinig people who are bragging about their LV's or other Luxury Items that are super fake sa unang tingin pa lang! Well, i'm gonna give you guys some tips in making sure that your Louis Vuitton is authentic (kahit you can't afford it.. pity!):1. If you buy your LV at a tiangge or at the streets specifically Uyanguren in Davao or Divisoria in Manila, it's FAKE! Duh, Louis Vuitton do not sell their items on some chipipay tiang...
My Research Paper: Philippines (Part 1)
2008-01-14 01:08:00 Eto ang 1st part of my research paper. I've researched this at an accurate, super respetadong online encyclopedia, even more "informational" than our lame Wikipedia. For more info 'bout the online encyclopedia, here's the link!Philippines IntroductionThe Republic of the Philippines is a nation of some 8,744 islands located in the Pacific Ocean, not far from China. The people of the Philippines, known as Filipinos, are best known for their overseas service as cafeteria personnel, mini-mart clerks, hotel maids, and transvestite prostitutes in countries around the world. The Philippines itself is a hotspot for sex tourism and pedophilia, as well as for a few AZN “al Qaeda” wannabes who have “taken over” some small villages on one of the islands. It is also the world’s largest exporter of large yellow-ish envelopes, known everywhere as “Manila envelopes.” “ More About: Research , Paper , Part
My Research Paper: Philippines (Part 1)
More articles from this author:2008-01-14 01:08:00 Eto ang 1st part of my research paper. I've researched this at an accurate, super respetadong online encyclopedia, even more "informational" than our lame Wikipedia. For more info 'bout the online encyclopedia, here's the link!Philippines IntroductionThe Republic of the Philippines is a nation of some 8,744 islands located in the Pacific Ocean, not far from China. The people of the Philippines, known as Filipinos, are best known for their overseas service as cafeteria personnel, mini-mart clerks, hotel maids, and transvestite prostitutes in countries around the world. The Philippines itself is a hotspot for sex tourism and pedophilia, as well as for a few AZN ?al Qaeda? wannabes who have ?taken over? some small villages on one of the islands. It is also the world?s largest exporter of large yellow-ish envelopes, known everywhere as ?Manila envelopes.? ?Technorati Tags:philippines More About: Research , Paper , Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 |



