JankasphereJankasphereTo All Who Loves Me, I Love You Too. To All Who Hates Me, I Hate You More. To All My Subscribers, Continue Your Support, To All My Detractors, Just Commit Suicide. Articles
My Research Paper: Philippines (Part 1)
2008-01-14 01:08:00 Eto ang 1st part of my research paper. I've researched this at an accurate, super respetadong online encyclopedia, even more "informational" than our lame Wikipedia. For more info 'bout the online encyclopedia, here's the link!Philippines IntroductionThe Republic of the Philippines is a nation of some 8,744 islands located in the Pacific Ocean, not far from China. The people of the Philippines, known as Filipinos, are best known for their overseas service as cafeteria personnel, mini-mart clerks, hotel maids, and transvestite prostitutes in countries around the world. The Philippines itself is a hotspot for sex tourism and pedophilia, as well as for a few AZN ?al Qaeda? wannabes who have ?taken over? some small villages on one of the islands. It is also the world?s largest exporter of large yellow-ish envelopes, known everywhere as ?Manila envelopes.? ? More About: Research , Paper , Part
My Research Paper: Philippines (Part 2)
2008-01-14 00:59:00 Eto ang 2nd part of my research paper. I've researched this at an accurate, super respetadong online encyclopedia, even more "informational" than our lame Wikipedia. For more info 'bout the online encyclopedia, here's the link!Philippines History of the Philippines The Philippine Islands were discovered in 1592 by Spanish explorer Ferdinand Magellan, who was taking his yacht on history?s first round-the-world cruise. After dropping anchor near a scenic beach on the main island and going ashore for a look around, Magellan and his crew were surprised not to find any other humans. There were, however, great numbers of a curious and friendly ape species, which followed the explorers in their sight-seeing tour around the island. By the end of the first day, when Magellan and his men established a campsite and prepared for bed, quite a few of the female apes indicated a desire to cuddle under the covers with the men. Naturally, these advances met with a mixed reception. In four years of... More About: Research , Paper , Part
My Research Paper: Philippines (Part 3)
2008-01-14 00:57:00 Eto ang 3rd part of my research paper. I've researched this at an accurate, super respetadong online encyclopedia, even more "informational" than our lame Wikipedia. For more info 'bout the online encyclopedia, here's the link!Philippines LanguageThe language of the Philippines is called Tagalog. Linguistically, Tagalog is a blend of the ancestral ape noises, Spanish and English. The typical Tagalog conversation sounds like barnyard chickens talking, with bits of European language mixed in for flavor. It is because of this ?chicken? aspect that Tagalog is also known as ?Buk-buk.? Indeed, sometimes the Filipinos themselves are known as ?Buk-buks? or even ?Book-books." Philippine media, newspapers, television and even Philippine Wikipedia use this bizarre combination in an attempt to convey meaning. As employees, Filipinos are required to learn and use only the language of the host country, as use of the Tagalog language frequently irritates local dogs and cats, who switch into hunt... More About: Research , Paper , Part , Part 3
My Research Paper: Philippines (Part 4)
2008-01-14 00:54:00 Eto ang 4th part of my research paper. I've researched this at an accurate, super respetadong online encyclopedia, even more "informational" than our lame Wikipedia. For more info 'bout the online encyclopedia, here's the link!Philippines ReligionBecause Spain owned the place for so long, nearly all Filipinos are Catholic, but a very strange kind of Catholic. In the Philippines, Easter is the year's biggest holiday. The natives prepare all year for the Holy Week activities, of which the most important are re-enactments of the Crucifixion. Men carry huge crosses, whip themselves to a bloody pulp, and have themselves nailed to the cross. It a delightful and picturesque spectacle for the tourists, and is all in the spirit of family entertainment. More About: Research , Paper , Part
My Research Paper: Philippines (Part 5)
2008-01-14 00:48:00 Eto ang 5th part of my research paper. I've researched this at an accurate, super respetadong online encyclopedia, even more "informational" than our lame Wikipedia. For more info 'bout the online encyclopedia, here's the link!Philippines Filipino CuisineSurprisingly, most Filipino cuisine is very much as it was more than 400 years ago, before they got RAPED by the white man. 97% of the Filipino diet consists of dog which is where they got their nicknames of doggo, dogeater, mans' worst friend, and dragonfuckers. A Brown Dog is fine too!In fact it is common to see ugly AS FUCK filipino childrens chasing dogs in the streets of Manila cutting off their ballz. Another staple of the filipino diet is balut, which is basically like eating your half born brothers fetus straight from your mothers glory hole. Balut in reality is unhatched duck or chicken eggs. Filipino's enjoy eating balut every minute of everyday to sustain their life long boners. If the Chinks eat e... More About: Research , Paper , Part
My Research Paper: Philippines (Part 6)
2008-01-14 00:41:00 Eto ang 6th part of my research paper. I've researched this at an accurate, super respetadong online encyclopedia, even more "informational" than our lame Wikipedia. For more info 'bout the online encyclopedia, here's the link!Philippines Filipinos TodayFilipinos like to think that they are AZN (Asian) but in reality they are the niggers of Asia just like Ireland is the niggerland of Europe. In America faggot filipino boys have grown fond of the nigger culture and have become in a sense, second class niggers. It is also a known fact that filipinos are the ugliest race in the entire earth (yes even uglier then monkeys) and that their men and women have the smallest PENISes and MELONS in the worldz. There are established filipino communities especially on the west coast where the men rape young girls and the old women rap along with the boys. Also they have dog feasts where they steal all the neighbor hood dogs and have a cookout. the president of the internets RON PAUL says he wish... More About: Research , Paper , Part
My New Die Hard Fan: A Hoax
2008-01-05 04:29:00 Hey! I have deleted the post entitled My New Die Hard Fan because the "real" Ameli sent me a message that her friend Sheila was the one who spammed the Jankasphere's Official Friendster Page. She's so super sweet naman talaga and told me everything na nangyari. Here's Ameli's response:From: am tanyag am_tanyag@yahoo.com>To: jankasphere@yahoo.comSent: Friday, January 4, 2008 6:10:09 PMSubject: Im so sorryhey it's me ameli, the real owner of "Smelly Ameli 1 & 2" on friendster.i just want to inform you that i haven't logged in on my friendster account for the past 5 days on both profile so. Shiela, my friend of mine asked me to borrow my friendster account because she need it to "assault" her ex-boyfriend because I and her ex-boyfriend were friends so she asked me to borrow my friendster account. And so I did.What I didn't know is she will use my account to ruin my reputation. Nagulat na lang ako nung makita ko ung face ko and my codename which is "secret" dito sa jankasph... More About: Die Hard , Hoax
Ask Janka!
2008-01-04 10:25:00 Hi guys! I'm currently making gawa ng second podcast and I want you to be part of it! In the comments area below, you can ask me anything; as in kahit ano! Then, sasagutin ko your questions and it will all be kasali in my second podcast! So, comment in your questions and ask Janka!To comment in your questions, click this link! | | v
My New Die Hard Fan!
2008-01-04 07:15:00 Gosh! I had the best New Year ever! That's why hindi ko na-update my blog 'coz I really had so much fun! Come to think of it, I was invited in 14 New Year Parties! OMG! I had really a super hectic sched! Well, those are the perks of being part of the altasociodad.Well, anyway, I made visit my blog kanina when this pesky commenter aliased as Secret whose name talaga is Ameli Boncolmo Tanyag caught my attention coz she's been infesting my chatbox with katutubo messages. I'm not pissed coz that's really what the chatbox is for diba? It's there para katutubos won't vandalize the comments area for my posts. "Smelly Ameli" also vandalized the comments area of the Official Jankasphere Friendster Page with these words:ang lungkot mo naman girl fuck up!Geez, she's super desperada ha! Haha.. Pity naman her, she's making pilit talaga herself to get my attention. Well, i'm really flattered! Thanks! Here's my gift for you Smelly Ameli:They're super cute together! Look! Smelly Ameli a... More About: Hard , Die Hard
Happy 10,000th!
2007-12-26 13:00:00 Today, as in now lang talaga, Jankasphere has reached it's 10,000th peak. 10,000 people have visited Jankasphere and enjoyed it's horrific vivacity! 10,000 people had been graced with immense wisdom. It has been a super saya experience even though in the midst of negative, backstabbing, super netibo-style comments by the dukha citizens of the Philippines, I remain strong. Because I have the vision of sharing my passion in hmm.. passion in Jankasphere-ing... whatever. Thank you for your support. Long live Janka, Long live Jankasphere!I would like to thank the following for their support:1. Blogger - for hosting my super sikat blog. I hope gumanda na ang interface nyo like Wordpress.2. Google Adsense - for my adverts.3. Mozilla Firefox - for my oh so adorable browser.4. eSnips - for hosting my podcast(s).4. Windows Vista Ultimate - for being super gandang Operating System5. My Mum - for my new Havaianas flip flops.6. My Dad - for my new Nokia N95 8GB. My Christmas wish came true!Tha... More About: Happy
OMG! Big Brother House: Hijacked! Oh No!
2007-12-25 13:47:00 I am really a fan of Big Brother , hmm, not here in the Philippines ha coz the version here is so corny, fake, commercialized, baduy, artista search, walang pizazz, and has a Bobo Big Brother. Well, I would be very bastos if I would compare Pinoy Big Brother to Big Brother UK coz PBB is so chipipay compared to BBUK! Gosh!What I like about BBUK:- Their Big Brother has no feelings. Not like here na so sensitive. Gosh, as if may body! Boses lang kaya siya! PBB kasi is super eew, ikinahihiya siguro siya ng ibang Big Brothers. Sa UK, walang ka-OAhan at super Dominant, not like here na palaging nagbabago ang isip.- Their House is like a bodega. Yup! The exterior of their house is like a bodega with barbed wires surrounding the entrance. It makes you feel super like a prisoner talaga! Love it!Big Brother 7 UK: Tour of the House- Their Logos are amazing!. Every year, may bagong design ang "eye" or ang logo ng BBUK according to the house theme. Not like here na super pangit. Mas maganda pa an...
Happy Christmas!!
2007-12-24 17:00:00 My Christmas Playlist! Enjoy! More About: Happy , Happy Christmas
It's Christmas and I'm Beautiful As Usual!
2007-12-24 15:57:00 Hey! It's Christmas Eve and I'm in my room, making ready the gifts for my Mum, Dad, Kuya Drew (my older brother), Issa (my little sister), Yaya Puring (my long-time ancient yaya) and Manong Elbert (my loyal driver extraordinaire).Here in Davao, you'll make pansin na that it's Christmas not because of the decors, music or the christmas sales but because of the native Lumad people who came down from the mountains to bring terror to the city! Personally, I really had trauma because of these pesky mountainous creatures. December last year, I strolled along Downtown Davao when these scary Lumad monsters came scurrying towards me! They were wearing those super dreadful clothes that were mismatched, gosh, walang fashion sense! Tapos they had these really cavity-infested teeth, with maggots coming out of their mouths! I hurriedly crossed the street pero they're still following me! OMG, I thought I was to be eaten alive so kinuha ko agad my old Fendi coin purse and made it tapon to them... More About: Beautiful
My Super Corny-to-death Suitors
2007-12-24 15:20:00 Hmm, super early pa para gumawa ng year-end post pero I've really got to post this kasi I can't bear the ka-cornihan. Eew talaga those guys who are super presko as if they're mabango; their confidence is parang unlimited. Hmm, here's a collection of super-duper-corny-talo-pa-si-willie-revil lame quotes that I received this year from my patay-to-death suitors:1. Favorite subject mo ba ang trigonometry? Kasi kahit saang angle ang ganda mo eh! - Janka: Nope, sorry, trigo is not my fave noh! In fact, my current fave subject is Database Design and Analysis. Sorry ha if hindi ka makarelate, it's not for bobos kasi eh! Shoo!2. May free time ka ba? Samahan mo naman ako sa psychiatrist, magdala daw kasi ako ng kinababaliwan ko. - Janka: I have no time for guys who are mentally ill. My advise sayo, go ka na sa Mental Hospital! Don't make ignore your mental struggles. Pity you!3. Tapos na ba exams mo? Para ako naman ang sagutin mo! - Janka: Yup! My exams are finished. And my sago... More About: Super , Death
New 5-Peso Bill
2007-12-23 10:29:00 If you're making pansin that the old 5-peso bill is out of the circulation, well, meron akong inside scoop for you. According to Central Bank of the Philippines, meron nang new design ang ating 5-peso bill. Diba dati, Emilio Aguinaldo is the coverboy of the 5 Peso but now, meron nang na-hire ang Central Bank na new model para sa new bill.Manny Pacquiao - 5-Peso CoverboyGosh naman that Manny Pacquiao ha! Pero infairness, he looks desente on his outfit! Hahaha! More About: Bill
My Christmas Wishlist
2007-12-23 08:57:00 Christmas is just two days away. I have made bili na all the gifts that I will make bigay to my friends and family. Now, for those who are obliged to give me gifts, well, here is my Christmas wishlish. So Dad, read this carefully.1. Double-strand Pearl Necklace by Mikimoto - I really love the pearls from Mikimoto kasi they are really super nice. Mikimoto kasi has the reputation of selling fine quality cultured pearls. This piece of fine jewelry costs only P375,000.00 only.2. Chanel Quilted 2.55 bag - A classic! Love it! This bag costs only P100,000.3. Limelight Metallic clutch by Louis Vuitton - This P71,000 envelope clutch ay super high-fashion. It's really nice to pair with my Lace Dress from MANGO.4. Pegase Amarante in Vernis by Louis Vuitton - this luggage bag is really super elegant. I really need this for my out-of-the-country escapades. It's only about P119,000.5. The Collection by Gioia Diliberto - This book is really a must read for those people who are really fashionista... More About: Christmas , Wishlist
Goodbye Rodolfo
2007-12-08 15:49:00 Let us pray for Rodolfo's soul. I am still in shock. Hindi ko pa ma-comprehend. I will miss him. More About: Goodbye
Janka's First Podcast
2007-12-06 13:02:00 Hello! Well, I would like to announce that meron na akong podcast!Note: I changed the pitch, tempo and frequency of the audio para hindi nyo makilala ang boses ko. It's like parang my defense mechanism lang.. so enjoy!Jankasphere Podcas...Technorati Tags: Podcast , Jankasphere
Je Me Sens Inquiet
2007-12-06 04:58:00 Et maintenant? Je ne suis pas sûr de ce que je me sens maintenant. C'est comme un mélange de colère, de nervosité, somnolence, etc. Le temps ajoute aussi mon fardeau, car il est si sacrément chaud! Il est censé être réveillon, mais pourquoi est-ce que le temps est comme cela? Je veux que la neige ici aux Philippines et je tiens maintenant! Je suis en exigeant? Peut-être, oui, mais c'est juste ce que je ressens en ce moment. Je veux mettre à jour Jankasphere plus souvent, mais je suis très paresseux, et non le négatif paresseux, paresseux, mais dans le sens que je suis fatigué et je veux arrêter, de la réflexion et de repos.J'ai quelque chose à vous dire, je suis juste agacé avec quelqu'un. Je commence à la déteste. Elle est vraiment ennuyeux! C'est en faisant de petits commentaires débat national! Et elle est mon partenaire dans l'une de nos activités universitaires. Damn Je la déteste!Donc, c'est tout pour aujourd'hui. Bye! More About: Sens
Eew! He's Super Bla Bla!
2007-12-04 06:29:00 I was having my lunch kanina sa Yellow Cab when this super yabang looking guy went in and sat at the table next to mine. Then he said: "Miss, may kasama ka ba? Pwedeng sabayan kita?" and I was like parang super shocked with what he said! Gosh, he's so super yabang! Then I said: "Sorry, I have no plans of having a new friend coz I've got many, go nalang to the cashier and ask her out. Bagay kasi kayo, hmm.. you look good together!". Then he looked at the cashier who was not that kagandahan and he fell silent nalang. I continued on eating my Sicilian Cheddar Fajita Chicken pizza when I noticed his flip-flops that were super imitation ng Havaianas. Good thing i'm good in inspecting if a product is fake or not. I made balot agad my remaining pizza and Mac & Cheese and I immediately went out kasi baka mag-diffuse na ang smell ng Athlete's Foot nya! Eew!Technorati Tags: Pizza , athlete's foot, yabang More About: Super
The Telenovela Saga!
2007-12-04 05:50:00 Whew! I was reminiscing about my super happy and luxurious childhood life when I remembered the "Telenovela Saga ". Grabe talaga those years ha! I was like parang in elementary when my super favorite telenovela which was Rosalinda was shown! If you Anti-Janka people would then make tira that it's so "not sosy" to watch telenovela, well, shut your smelly, cavity enriched bunganga coz even us socialites that are members of the alta-sociodad are normal people (pero not like you ha, we're like parang much much much much more nakakaangat than you).I was about 10 or 11 years old when Rosalinda was shown here on the Philippines. I can still remember the song.. Rosalinda, Rosalinda, Rosalinda Ay Amor, AY AMOR! Haha.. It's still playing on my mind, parang it's my LSS for today pero I would just ignore it coz So Simple by Stacie Orrico is my featured LSS for today!Rosalinda and Fernando Jose are so super really cute together, it's like Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens of the early 2000's (p... More About: ABS-CBN , Elen
Weng: The Wacky WonderBAKLA
2007-12-02 11:49:00 I was having my video-trip kanina when I saw this really "interesting" music video. The song was entitled Sweet Nothin's by the "ancient" Brenda Lee. I have no hinanakit with our kapatid na gays ha, coz in fact, I really like them 'coz they're funny and gay! But this bakla is sort of annoying, pero annoying na funny. Hmm, you wouldn't understand me if you would not make tingin this video.OMG, I can't stop laughing!Technorati Tags: gay, bakla
My Friendster and Myspace Accounts!
2007-11-23 16:07:00 Hi everyone! Well, I am very happy to inform you that meron nang Official Account ang Jankasphere sa Friendster and Myspace ! So, If your interested (in which I know naman thay your dying to be my friends in friendster or myspace), visit the Official Accounts now! As in now na! Don't wait until there's moss covering you ha, also don't be hiya, invite the Official Accounts now!Jankasphere Official Friendster Account:Jankasphere Official Myspace Account:P.S.: The Friendster Account had been my personal account and I changed it to be my Official Account. I just had started the Myspace Account a few days ago so I have not that much friends compared with the Friendster Account.Technorati Tags: friendster, myspace, jankasphere
Janka's Good Deeds No. 5
2007-11-21 04:02:00 Janka's Good Deed No. 5: I Appreciated An Anonymous CommenterA comment from an anonymous moron:"hay nako janka.. i make hintay everyday for your next post ha... how many years na ba? as in napakatagal.. watz ur pinagkakaabalahan these days ba? haaay... baka ur poor na and ur internet line or satellite eh nacut na how many days ba? so nakakahiya naputulan.. and worst you cant even buy a single isp card or make go to the internet cafe di mo afford.. as in ughhh... wat ba yan..anywayz kahit na ur poor na i will support you parin but if you will be amoy lupa and ketongin... go to hell!i have extra barya here in my pocket.. its 500 pa i will make donate nalang for you so you can make bawi and start off a new business like becoming a tindera in the market.."Janka:"hay nako janka.. i make hintay everyday for your next post ha... how many years na ba? as in napakatagal.. watz ur pinagkakaabalahan these days ba? - Hi, anonymous moron. Well, I was busy these past few days because I have a l... More About: Deeds
Janka's Good Deeds No. 4
2007-11-16 06:26:00 Janka's Good Deed #3: I Joined one.orgI was surfing the net kanina when I stumbled upon this site called one.org whose campaign ay para sa poor people of the world. I was really touched by their campaign that seeks to raise public awareness about the issues of global poverty, hunger, disease and efforts to fight such problems in developing countries. Wow, very touching naman! So I never made dalawang-isip and I immediately joined and now, I'm a member na of ONE.ORG More About: Deeds
Janka's Good Deeds No. 3
2007-11-15 14:59:00 Janka's Good Deed #3: Yaya's Extreme MakeoverYaya Puring (her totoong name is Prudencia) is my yaya since birth. She's been my Mommy's yaya, then, ipinamana siya sa older sister ko, then, passed on to me. So Yaya Puring is really one of our family's heirloom. She's really looks super ancient, I even made duda if naging BF niya si Magellan or even ang Homo Habilis eh.Yaya Puring is like my mommy, except the fact that my mum has no kulubot on the face. Yaya always takes care of me since I was born kaya I really love her so much; more than I love my Yves Saint Laurent purse that I purchased from Rodeo Drive in Beverly Hills 2 summers ago.I decided to treat Yaya Puring for a makeover so I grabbed her agad shoved her in the car. We went to Infinty Spa which is my favorite spa in the whole wide world. I said to the staff that they should take care of Yaya Puring coz she's super fragile and baka ma-dislocate ang bones nya kapag nasobrahan ng massage. The staff hurriedly pulled Yaya ... More About: Deeds
Janka's Good Deeds Nos. 1-2
2007-11-13 12:52:00 It's been few days na since I started my new Christmas gimik and I'm having fun (pero not that fun.. ewan!). So here's my good deeds:Janka's Good Deed #1: Hulog Barya To The LataMe and my bessy went to the mall nung Sunday to have our weekly shopping. I bought this really super nice dress sa MANGO and I'm wearing it now, it's just super nice. When we were about to make bayad our apparels when I saw this lata at the counter which says 163. I've remembered about the good deeds that I'm gonna do, so, I made lagay nalang my loose change there sa lata which was about 550 pesos. I'm sure super happy ang lata coz now, thanks to me, may laman na siya!Janka's Good Deed #2: I Said "Thanks Mr. Manong!"After our exhausting shopping spree, me and my bessy had our foot massage at Infinity Spa. After that, Manong Elbert which was my driver since Kindergarten made sundo na me, so, I said my goodbyes to my bessy and made beso to her and I rode the car na. When we arrived at the house, I re... More About: Deeds
100 Good Deeds For Janka!
2007-11-10 13:23:00 It's Christemasse time and I was making isip yesterday about a nice gimik for the yuletide season. I have thought of doing 100 Good Deeds starting today up to Boxing Day (Dec. 26th) and I would be posting all my good deeds here on Jankasphere! I bet super happy ang mga anti-Janka jan sa corner coz for more than a month, you will not lose your temper...It's hard for my part kasi i've got to make swallow my pride (which is not so dami naman, thank goodness!) and be a good girl. If you're making duda of my sincerity, well, don't make duda nalang coz you'll just make pagod yourselves and die.My next post would be my Good Deed Nos. 1-4. Good luck to me!
Janka Strikes Back!
More articles from this author:2007-11-08 00:05:00 Few days ago, pinagkaguluhan my blog by those poverty-stricken natives and went amok on my Marimar post. Gosh ha, you guys need some Breeding (and if hindi nyo know kung what is Breeding well, don't make pahirap on your tiny katutubo brains coz kawawa naman kayo if you'll have headaches.. gosh).Let's go backtrack... What ba I've said? I just said lang naman that Marimar is so ugly that if compared, mas magmumukhang tao pa si Kokey. Well, I think naman it's true eh. I also wrote that that starlet who played Marimar is a chipipay boldstarlet. And gosh, I mean to say it.The reaction of the katutubos are really funny, they said that "i hope you die in your sleep you fucking bitch!", "booba..boobita...junka! suka!yuck!!! maraksot!! yawa!!". They're really funny, promise! I was laughing so hard when I read those low-level, un-educated comments. I'm just natatawa nalang on their ka-OAhan.Here are the other comments made by the netibos:Netibo #1: tama name mo... JANKA.... "JUNK KA" ... More About: Back 1, 2, 3 |
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