Oh For Fuck's Sake!Oh For Fuck's Sake!Born from the afterbirth of Stupid Fucking Customers, Phorenzik and his supporters join forces to create the angriest outlet for bloggers online. New writers welcome to create the ultimate Blog Of Anger! 
Articles
Big Brother Special : The Douchebag Digest
2008-06-06 00:21:00 Well this years Big Brother is officially underway and being bored whilst it pollutes my TV, I figured I'd be the first to assess this years contestants a rather shallow but suitable digest in a piece I'm calling The Douchebag Digest read more More About: Special
New Blog Theme - Your thoughts?
2008-06-04 16:53:00 * Wank - put the old one back * Somewhat Wank * Meh...not bothered, just get posting you fucks... * Better than the last but still not great * Awesome, now post some blogs... More About: Blog , Thoughts , Theme
Lame-ass lyrics
2008-06-03 21:32:00 I was doing the washing up last night, listening to the shabby local radio station - "Radio Aire best of the 80s,90s and now!" - In defence, the missus was helping, it seemed a fair deal. Anyway, I hear this inspid plodding rock song which I hadn't heard before. I immediately recognise the faux-growl as Nickelback. Normally this wouldn't wind me up too much - Nickelback happens. What really wound me up were the song's lyrics. A sample of my favourite rhyming couplets: read more More About: Lyrics , Lame
bloody internet!!!
2008-06-02 17:16:00 Some of you may have noticed a distinct lack of me on this website and the internet as a whole, i would usually complain about exams or wanky teachers but i cannot even connect to the internet! so yeah will blog more when i can get back online :), until then au revior! just so you know i'm writing this over at my nan's house. More About: Internet , Bloody
Science's refusal to heed Terminator's clear warning.
2008-06-02 11:27:00 Genuine text from the BBC - The Skynet platform was due to fly from French Guiana on Friday but technicians called a halt to the countdown just hours before lift-off. Software on the launch vehicle did not behave normally during a test sequence. Well, no. Becoming self-aware isn't normal, is it? Honestly, science-folk, I don't see what more Arnie could do to warn you. Leave this kind of shit alone!! More About: Warning , Clear
Jobhunting WANK
2008-05-30 09:40:00 So I apply for a position advertised on a jobs board, attach my CV and a covering letter. Then I get an email asking me for addition information. The link takes me to a page where I am asked to input my details again! Why? You've already got my details and everything you need to know! Why are you wasting my time? Fucks sake. Twats. p.s. I'm actually working, and it's loads better than my last job, but there are better jobs out there and I've set my sights higher this time. More About: Cunts
Alton Towers ban PDA usage on park yet scrotish teenages and your bastard k
2008-05-28 11:56:00 I wouldn't say I was bitter from my Alton Towers experience, I'd say I was seriously fucked off. I mean, I haven't been back since yet surprisingly didn't write a letter of complaint, nor did I blog the event (although it was a couple of years ago when I didn't vent so much), so to hear that they're planning on banning PDAs on park is just fucking ridiculous... let me tell you my tale. read more More About: Park , Bastard , Usage
£150 for Rock Band?? Fuck You EA and Fuck You to the UK
2008-05-22 17:05:00 read more More About: Band , Rock , Fuck , Rock Band
Awesome NES Controller Table
2008-05-21 13:55:00 Normally I wouldn't condone the post of a Nintendo related product or blog on this, or any site to be quite honest... unless it was to reign hate on the wank, overpriced emulation service that is the Virtual Console but I thought this was friggin' awesome and you all needed to see it. read more More About: Awesome , Table , Controller
Mother Fucking Norton Internet Security
2008-05-19 14:39:00 I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that at least one of out readers has this wank on their machine. Go on... admit it... you either paid for this faeces, or even worse, you bought a laptop from PC World with it preinstalled and thought just because its "free" for 12 months, you'd just leave it on. If that is you, let me be (probably not) the first person to call you a fucking massive cunt read more More About: Security , Internet , Internet Security , Mother , Fucking
You can judge a man by the pictures on his phone...
2008-05-15 13:14:00 It will come as no surprise to anyone that knows me that I got relatively drunk over the weekend. I'm not proud of that, I mention it only in to explain why its taken me until Thursday to dig out the two photos I planned to send to Idiot Toys; I'd forgotten that I found this little beauty of a remote, only for this morning for someone to have beaten me to it!!! read more More About: Pictures , Phone , Judge
More email scams....
2008-05-13 01:45:00 Does anyone remember when Delmorpha won the irish lottery?? Well I got one better from a lovely Mr Richard. He is offering me £15million pounds!!!one1 Obviously I just had to reply. Here's the original message... feel free to spot the mistakes. ----------------------------------------- ---------- My Good Friend, read more More About: Email , Scams
The biggest names in rock music?
2008-04-29 13:02:00 Ok, full Glastonbury line-up is revealed. Here's what the BBC have to say: The Kings of Leon, The Raconteurs and Crowded House will be among the bands taking the top slots on the Pyramid Stage during June's three-day event. Among the other acts listed are Mark Ronson, Panic At The Disco, Massive Attack and Groove Armada. The Fratellis, KT Tunstall, Shakin' Stevens, The Verve and Goldfrapp are among the other big acts confirmed to play on the largest stage at the festival. read more More About: Music , Rock , Rock Music , Names
Computer survey.
2008-04-26 00:08:00 I'm going to do a quick survey here: How many of you have ... lets say ... have Internet Explorer installed on your machines, just put your hands up. Okay, about 85-90%. Keep your hands up if you use it regulaly. Wow, about, yeah, 90% of you guys put your hands down. read more More About: Windows , Linux , Safari , Mac , Firefox
Ubuntu updates
2008-04-18 19:52:00 So, I've downloaded the beta release of the new Ubuntu OS 8.04 Hardy Heron. I'll write some propaganda for it on the 25th ( The actual full release date. ) With it being in beta you would expect some updates, and there are some, but I know when my bandwidth is going to be used by them, unlike Windows Update, and that it won't be used to update internet explorer, also unlike Windows Update. read more More About: Microsoft , Updates
My new hero.
2008-04-18 16:36:00 A *rare* non-hatred related post from me, now. This guy, Jonathon Lee Riches, is my new hero! He's currently in jail in South Carolina, and appears to be amusing himself by filing some of the most brain-spinningly ludicrous law-suits imaginable. Law suits like this: read more More About: Hero
Pointless Reporting
2008-04-17 16:33:00 Somehow a 5 year old boy has got a patent for sticking two brooms together. The full story can be read here : http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7350341.stm and the most shocking part? "Mr Houghton, who by chance is a patents lawyer, was so impressed he decided to help Sam apply for a patent." By Chance?!?! fuck off! More About: Pointless
Apart from that, Mrs Lincoln, how did you enjoy the play?...
2008-04-17 11:45:00 As you may have gathered from the title (or not, if you are a thickie!), it's ASSASINATION TIME!! It's long been my desire to thin the herd of 'entertainers' who have long passed their sell-by date, and as luck would have it, they've played right into my hands!! read more More About: Lincoln , Play , Enjoy
Disabled? NO. Baldy fuckwit? OH YES!
2008-04-16 16:18:00 Greetings, anger-mongers! Sorry for my lengthy absence - many things have conspired to keep me away from you, but I've recently come to the decison that all these things can, in fact, go and fuck themselves in the arse 'til their colons rupture. So, just to get back in the spirit of hatred, I shall tell you of this fuckwit. This fella, flying in the face of all reason, has decided to try and sue a school for constructive dismissal (on disability grounds) because... . read more More About: Disabled
Ooh look at me, I'm a massive scrotum but its always "Somebody Elses Fault"
2008-04-15 14:42:00 Case 1 Name: Kieron Saunders Why they're a retard: Burnt himself using a sunbed for 21 minutes in one day What the Bovine Masses want: Banning of coin operated tanning salons What really should happen : He should be forced to stay in a sunbed for a whole day and the readers of The Sun should shut the fuck up Hopes for the future : He gets face cancer and becomes the next Elephant Man, then has to join the circus and wear his Tumor of Shame as a permanent reminder that he's a fucking douchebag read more More About: Fault
Things I would write about if I wasn't so busy at work coding my Monkey Isl
2008-04-09 17:07:00 This bullshit that's still banging on about the Peoples Whore and Paul "Cunting" Burrell... get over it already, she's deader than dead and it isn't changing... ever! I seriously hope he gets sent to pound me in the ass prison to meet his new cell mate Tyreese read more More About: Monkey , Work , Write , Coding , Things
Scotland : The land of shit weather and deep fried everything...
2008-04-03 14:27:00 I'm sat in the bar at a quaint little Scottish Caravan site enjoying a beer... well I would be if it wasn't swarming with the offspring of the Great Unwashed and my Bullet For My Valentine album wasn't being drowned out by the cabaret cover of Dance The Night Away by The Mavericks blaring from the other room. read more More About: Weather , Scotland , Shit , Deep , Land
How China ruined "The Three S's"
2008-03-29 14:39:00 Welcome to the latest update in the micro-epic: Rage inducing China moments". This latest installment concerns something very close to my and every other man's heart. The Three S's read more
The Great(!) fireWall of China
2008-03-26 17:12:00 At the moment I'm in China visiting the in-laws: typing this entry over a normal Chinese home connection. This mean that everything I can access from my laptop has been filtered through "The Great FireWall" - TGFW to you and me. For those of you who haven't heard of TGFW it's basically the tool the Chinese Government use to filter out the following from citizens' internet connections; 1) Outside news 2) Subversive thought 3) pr0n read more More About: Firewall , Great Firewall of China
A Guide to Motivating your Staff for Bosses who are 100% Cunts
2008-03-25 20:51:00 Having worked Friday/Monday of the Bank Holiday weekend and being on call for the last 2 weekends to boot, one might say one is a little pissed off with work. One might even go so far as saying one is so fucked off with his current employment, the thought of telling ones boss where to shove his fucking job is one I consider on a nanosecondly basis and hence a list of ways to keep yor staff happy and productive, especially when they've been busting a gut for you so you can have a break in your company paid for camper van... read more More About: Guide , Cunts , Staff
Do your own job!!!!
2008-03-22 22:36:00 I was recently given the nick name of 'Angry Dad' after the Simpsons episode where Bart makes cartoons about Homer. Last week we're about to get this new CMS system up (which we all now suspect is a bag of wank, I seriously mean all of us think this is now a BOW including the guy who seriously knows his stuff. When this guy says it's pants, it's pants. I could whinge about this seriously expensive BOW CMS till death but I won't) and people were tasked with checking out the chunks of the website they did to see if it looked good before making visible to the world. read more
Not very chuff-chuffed!
2008-03-22 20:31:00 Get this shit, my son who's nearly 2, is very much into Thomas the Tank Engine at the moment, which I'm cool with because I used to think it was pretty shit-hot when I was a lad. I can remember all the characters names and everything [smirks]. read more
OhFFS Special! I Won the Irish Lottery : My True Story told...
2008-03-17 18:31:00 Being a big fan of the 419 Eater website the opportunity to give some spamming douchebag some shit is one I take at every opportunity, especially when its to my personal hotmail account that I rarely give out to anyone other than close friends and is obscure enough to lead me to the source of a leak. Today I found out I've won the Irish Lottery ... PRIZE NOTIFICATION!!! We are pleased to announce the result of the Irish Sweepstakes Program held on MARCH 15th,2008. Your E-mail address attached to the winning ticket number: read more More About: Story , Special , True Story
No Crust for Old Moan
More articles from this author:2008-03-16 17:09:00 A retro-sneer at a product introduced to our fair country about 2 years ago, introduced to me every time I go to the fucking supermarket for a cry and why it will end the world. read more More About: Crust 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 |
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