Jerkulez's Ay Kallaaam!!Jerkulez's Ay Kallaaam!!The nothingness of somethings and the anythingness of everything. Blogging the over-blogged world wide web. Articles
The reason why? What else, Egyptians of course! Cntd..
2008-05-18 20:42:00 Here are some more...Things Egyptians are responsible for-WW1, WW2, and probably WW3-Tom Cruise lost his mind over Scientology-The nuclear bomb-Darfur crisis-Mario character-Danica Patrick finally won a major race-Bill Gates lost his place as the richest man alive for the first time in 13 years-Heath Ledger's death-Kill Bill 2, not Kill Bill 1-The fall of troy-Iron Maiden-Big foot-Will Smith always plays the role of the superhero that saves the day-300Things Egyptians are not a part off. But Aliens!-Fool (Beans)-Spetospates (Eldebana)-keliobatra cigarettes-Winning the ACN 6 time total , twice back to back-AL-Zamalek-Playing Pulp fiction in cinemas after montaging and rearranging the sequence of the movie so ppl can understand it-krkr wi all lemby movies-Egyptian labor is cheaper than Indian in the IT field-Adel Imam kissing almost all Arab actresses in his movies-Girls now are more nude and free...yay for guys More About: Reason
The reason why? What else, Egyptians of course!
2008-05-17 21:21:00 The following piece is based on fake, totally untrue, non-occurring circumstances!As for why i chose this topic to write about?, well what else could it be, Egyptians of course.Things Egyptians are responsible for-The Tibet problem with China-The moon landing-The Eiffel tour-The statue of liberty-The oil price crisis-The 9/11 attack-That Bush was elected president for the second term-The tsunami that hit Asia couple of years ago-Hillary Clinton is still in the race for presidency-Joey got canceled after 2 seasons-The war in Iraq-The Michael Jackson freak show-South park-Manchester United declared champions of the premiere league 2 season back to back-New England Patriots lost the super bowl after an incredible record breaking season-Diana got killed (that one might actually be true :D)-Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt broke up-Angelina Jolie is pregnant again-PS3Things Egyptians are not a part off. But Aliens!-The driving crisis in the middle east-The bad perception of Egyptians as la... More About: Reason
With Power comes Responsibility (and some fun too)
2008-04-12 07:09:00 A phrase that has been lingering in the back of my head for quite some time now,ever since i watched "Superhero Movie", which just happens to be one of those movies that pun superhero movies, mainly Spider-man, and of course, the words of wisdom came up in the film, what will a Spider-man movie be with out that cliche line.And so it got me thinking, it really does make much sense, with power does comes responsibility (won't use the words great cuz we are just human, not superheroes)So as i wait to get bitten by a spider so i can have awesome power (Superman is an alien and Wolverine is a mutant, Batman is too dark, Hulk is stupid, ugly and green, making Spider-man highly probable)As i was saying in my quest to obtain power by twisted means of fate or accident, i started contemplating about my own powers as they are, then started to think of other ppl powers.People have a many different powers, and u don't need to be a superhero to have them, ya so ur not jumping building, flying, ... More About: Power
The Culture Ride! Day 3
2008-03-15 13:01:00 Ah! for our last of the three culture rides, we come to that of WednesdayThis one i had trouble being convinced into going to, you see it was a Zar night.As to why i was against it, its better i explain what the Zar is or better yet click the link to read about it and get a brief idea.Done Reading! great, so in essence, Zar is a pagan ritual. and since all the movement and the crazy dance and screaming is not my cup of tea, i didn't want anything to do with it.But i don't like preceding judgments, so i went to ask about the group doing the ZarCalled Mazaher, this group are actual practioners of Zar ritual, but as it is a form of a dying art, i was told that the music aspect of the ritual was brought to the attention of the ppl.And so, it was only music, no demonic possession or face slapping, hair pulling, needle piercing or whatever they do there crapAnd i decided to go, so did a few of my friends, and we went and so did a fewer of my frinedsit was nice, not a blowout like the ot... More About: Culture , Ride
The Culture Ride! Day 2
2008-03-15 12:02:00 Tuesday, starts as Monday ended (Ballet night), at work as usual :S, all speaking and telling my tales of the night before.... (check previous post, Day 1)When Came in Mezo, telling us, we are going someplace different, also culture related, but this time Folklore culture related.All was in agreement, to attend the show that night, and we left things at that and every body headed back to work.Time to go, its 8 o'clock and the show starts @ 9, and we are still miles away. We get ready, car poll and drive to our destination barely in time, after a good deal of time getting lost and asking the wrong ppl, where the place is.We got seated as the band starts setting up this gig, music starts and beats flow, Reda Sheha comes out to sing and sing she did, a great strong voice flows, and the music playsSidetrack - A bit of info on Folklore for those not familiar with it, music instruments consisted mainly of the Nay, an Arghul , the Rababa (spike flute), Riqq and the Tabla, and backup si... More About: Culture , Ride
The Culture Ride! Day 1
2008-03-15 11:04:00 Ah! It's the second half of the weekend (Saturday), and i thought i should sit and jot what happened last week, as you can gather from the title, it involves culture. So what is it that happened and is culture oriented that made me want to write.3 days, 3 different experiences, 3 culture shocks!Started all out on Monday, while at work, i came to know that an outing was being planned, someplace that requires full formal attire, in the Opera house.It was Ballet!, yes Ballet! I attend a ballet show for the first time, and it was Zorba, performed by the National Ballet Team.So i head back home hastily to change and dress up and then go out to meet the rest of the possy, we gather, and we head to the theater.As the show starts to begin with choir and orchestra taking their places, i started reading a small booklet with an info to the cast and the plot line and a breif history on the creator and composer of the piece.Lights dim, curtains open, and comes in a male performer, music plays, ... More About: Culture , Ride
The visit!
2008-02-18 22:22:00 My heart starts pounding louder and louder as i grow nearer and nearer of my destination,a fateful meeting it will be, a meeting to decide how tomorrow will be, and how today will end!I mean for me it has to be the most dreaded visit of them all, something i must do, and eventually everyone does it too.How is it possible to go in and come out the same man or person u were beforea life changing experience that can either comfort you with a great smile or leave you with so much pain, yet you come back again, hoping that this pain will go away!as i walk my final steps, i come upon a door, the door that i fear but never the less welcomes mei knock and the doors opens, showing me a glimpse of what is to come...i sit and start to talk and then to another room i go in...heart beats faster, hair starts standing up, and the sweat glands start doing their job in this cold weather.Oh God, make this an easy visit, make this all go away, help me through it"Sit!, my son" i hear the voice vaguely.... More About: Visit , The Visit
Me and Zwarx.. the voyage (pt2)
2008-02-17 23:30:00 So after quite some time i get back to completing my first story.....!Again i'm doing this as i go..!A long long loooooooooong time agoIn a far away, so far faaaaaaaar awaay!a jedi was on board a space ship in a quest for greatness...hmmm feels like i read that somewhere before, wait that's not my storyOk give me a sec, i need to read to remember what i wrote back then........reading......reading.....stil l reading......hmmmm.....getting the idea....more reading....Done!Big problem i prob, can't continue from where i left off..... damn these cliffhangers..... here it goes.Back on planet Earth, command center was getting all sorts of reading, as to where the ship is and how it is doing, and u can clearly feel smthg was not rite from how the monitor guy looked reading the screen to his sup. And the man outside was wondering what has happened, what is wrong! (for more info on the man...keep reading, hopefully we'll know who he is)The Spaceship shouted RED, as the lights covered alli... More About: Voyage
Fade away
2008-02-17 23:12:00 Can't breathWithout seeing ur faceCan't go onWithout feeling ur graceCan't liveSince u left without a traceOh! hope, i have lostDreams, that will never showReasons, that are no moreAnd u fade awayThe sound of ur voiceThe song, that is youThe gaze of ur beautyThe picture, that is youThe look of ur eyesThe smile that is youOh! hope i have lostDreams are no more trueReasons are forever goneWhen you fade awayAnd then it hurts no moreA memory far awayA feeling that's so overMy feelings, i now ownMy breath, now i can takeOh! hope i have regainedDreams, i will holdReasons, i give againAfter you fade away More About: Fade
Egyptians and the Wawa Aba
2008-02-08 12:39:00 DOM DOM DOMDOM...MASRoooh egyptianawyy!!These where some of the many chants that filled the air yesterday, as Wawa Aba made 70+ million ppl extremely happy as it got scored 4 times in the mighty Cote D'Ivoire ' The Elephants' aka ivory cost. in what was an epic match, that not even the most optimist would've thought that outcome could be possible.From the initial fear of not performing well as this tournament started, to the shocking defeat of the Cameroon in our first game, followed by an even bigger surprise of beating The Elephants in the semi final, only to meet the ego bruised Cameroonians again, for a final showdown, for a proof of dominance.I myself see that luck has been on our side, plus of course some good play, but we are yet far from being a strong tactical team, we are a skill oriented and we played on the mistakes of our opponents....To clarify on what this whole things means, for Egyptians , football is among a rare few things that ppl come together for, feel conn...
zamalekism
2007-12-23 19:15:00 The syndrome that is Zamalekism, takes roots in the Egyptian ppl, who hate the El-Ahly mainly and believe the club is synonymous with the corruption of the government and the football federation that governs football in Egypt.A state of mind where zamalekians (those who support Zamalek) are complexed and baffled by the cosmic secret that is El-Ahly club, hailed as the best team of Africa and the middle east (though questionable, it makes sense, since its the oldest club created)EL-Ahly club is revered as one of the unexplained phenoms of the cosmos, supported by money, law, power and strange luck (bet they do some voodoo shit), they rule supreme over the middle east and Africa's football throne.If anything, El-Ahly club is a club with smart talented board of trusties, a symbol ppl grew to like and attach to. The name itself, is Arabic for the word population or people, representing all sects of society, almost all sects...Those remaining, the nobles were then represented in the for...
Connected
2007-12-10 00:31:00 So i think it's about time i started continuing my short story, u know the one i started ions ago, me and Zwarx...So lights were red the ship was on high alert and.............................cut, cut!..............second thought, now is not the time to do so, as i need time to do so!Ah! how about the book review I've been talking about, or maybe a movie review.....Nah not now, i am sleepy and i got work 2morrow....For now lets just say some random words and see how they fall in placeThe winds slips through my fingers as i spread my arms apartslipping in a spiral spin i fallgradually a smile draws my facewill i heed the universe's callcan you feel me embracethe wind, the rain, the stormCan u feel me capture the essence ofthe sun, the moon and the starsconnected with the worldI amA glance at the dark light skythen came yousilent voice like the sweetest melodyeyes like a picture divinea heart that lyrics its mindand thou stars are far awaythey shine our wayand just like oneI'll gu... More About: Connected
3 random things
2007-12-09 10:56:00 Time for some Q&A How do my friends describe me? 1-Funny 2-Funny 3-Funnyok ok that was a fun one to get things starting,now time for the serious stuffHow do my friends describe me (the serious one)? 1- Funny (i swear) 2- Hilarious (what can i do, i am) 3- LooneyHow do my friends describe part 2 1- A character out of a cartoon show 2- Crazy 3- Lazy ButtThings i'm thinking about at the moment 1- Sex (not porn) 2- Food (what can i say i'm weak) >> kinda feel like joey now (i want girls on bread) 3- My blog / stand-up (all mixed up)Things i don't want to do 1- Go to work 2- kill someone 3- Run home errandsThings i should do 1- Run home errands 2- Go to work (ahhhhhhhhhh!) 3- Not kill someoneFav. chars 1- Chandler 2- Taylor Durden 3- TerminatorObjects i like 1- My bed 2- My A/C 3- My MP3 Objects i hate (cause they exist yet u need them) 1- My PC/laptop 2- My Cell phone 3- My IDRules i follow 1- Islam 2- My own convictions 3- WorkRules i do... More About: Random
S.o.S.
2007-12-05 01:38:00 So it was the First day of the last month of this year, when i decided to change my posts, maybe make them shorter or do meme blogging, write a book review (at least start on one), maybe even a love song or smthg, i don't know what i am gonna do, but i do know if i did, then i will mix it up.Was gonna do a meme blog, but me am woozy...so i'll just point out some hilarious vids that i came across for Will Ferrell.The first in the series, is called "The Landlord"and if u think that is funny, check this out "Baby cop"Pearl is just so amazingA different one, this is a short clip , but funny called "Third Date"This is it for the night. time to meet some ZZZsS.O.S. is Some af Something
Potter Puppet Pals in Wizard Swear
2007-12-05 01:26:00 Riddikulusly hilarious :D More About: Potter , Wizard , Puppet
The Audition
2007-11-24 11:09:00 Last Wednesday, i was planning on going to the Axis of Evil comedy tour show here in Egypt (yah baby). the show was good but i had watched most of it before (damn youtube), but overall ppl were ecstatic about the gig, with ppl favouring different performers and all has their own reasons, and what about the Korean kid they picked up through the tour .... half vit half Korean born in Saudi and raised in Jordan, the dude i mean speaks and sings Arabic perfect (to perfect to be true maybe created in a genetic lab somewhere), ok whatever...So they held these auditions for stand ups on that same day, and i knew about that at 11.30 pm the night before when a friend called up with this intel, so i sat down after getting frantically possessed to make the world laugh, sat down came up with 2 page worth of material (some good shit) and even came with new shit while there waiting for my turn, and practiced as i was on my way to the audition place next morning in the car (yah great practice othe... More About: Audition
Me and Zwarx...lift off (pt1)
2007-11-18 12:33:00 ....."1 minute to countdown", the voice echoed all thought the space shuttle 'Nemrod', "finally to the up and beyond i am heading" i thought in my head, a flood of recent memories started to playback in FF, the fight with my chief about my diet, the sweet love with my wife, the smile of my baby girl and the hearts of my fellow human race; for today history will be made, today scribes down the first chapter in a long journey towards making the unknown.. well simply known. "..9,8,7....huh!..oh..6,5,4,3,2...1, 0.75, 0.5, 0.25, 0.25 .....LIFT OFFFFFF!!" "Weeeeeeeeee!"; "I'm going into space , I'm going into space nah nah nanah" ecstatically i cried out, throwing my tongue out to all those who said i couldn't make it. As we left the the stratosphere followed by the ionosphere, i toke a glimpse out my window seat to my left to look back at the place i call home, dark and gloomy it was with little blue and lots of black, it was dark times for planet earth, the atmosphere was not what ... More About: Lift
Weekend @ work
2007-11-09 13:40:00 We all work -well! the better 9 out of 10 ppl who actually have to work off to afford their dreams- we go through life doing smthg most of us dint even like that much, sometimes slave to make end meets or work extra shifts or weekends to get that little smthg u need (sometimes u just have to work weekends to meet deadlines); And ya ya i know, the famous "love what u do till u do what u love" saying that tricks us all in doing smthg that we might come to remotely love after a while but never end up doing what u really love, cuz lets face it, what we love most of the time ain't an easy field to break-in, not ur typical field of work where u graduate from college and start doing it, for example being a prof sports player, i know I wanted to be one (still do and would've been but lost my window); Another is being in a band and making it big (also want this but maybe I'll just have a band); Other include artistic kinda jobs like writing (doing it) drawing, photography..etc, some (luc... More About: Work , Weekend
Weak or just being polite!
2007-11-03 12:36:00 I write today in place of a good friend, she feels frustrated regarding this particular issue and would like to vent and i purposed to do that on her behalf, after all its a problem most of us face, and very frequently if not on daily basis.Am i weak if i decide to address someone properly and give them respect when normally they are not even worth the time or effort. Don't believe so.Before anyone jumps to conclusion on me being weak, I'm a 6'2, 300 lbs, box playing (used to play), wrestling trained , american footballer. and for those who argue that its all about heart i got miles and miles of heart and got the scars to prove it. Not to mention a loud voice that pretty much stops ya dead at ur tracks. (i know.. how can someone so great live and never hear about).So pretty much if i did snap (i do not get angry..i go from cold to snap) ill probably pile driver ya (if the body ratios are good) or simply fuck ya up. so don't let me snap, you won't like me when i snap!Yet i was l...
POV....the impact!
2007-11-02 14:25:00 Everyday you wake up with this supposed to be new hope that today is better than the last, sometimes you right and others you're not (would like to think that the former far exceeds the second), it really depends on how you see things, depends on the "POV" (air quotes); I for myself am a "Everything is relative, depends on how you see it" kinda guy.What you might consider refreshing (take for example, a short skirt nice legged woman), can be offensive or derogatory for others. Also what gives us distinction from other homosapiens, is that particular pov regarding matters of life.Interesting enough it seems that most povs stem from a wrong or controversial argument, Wrong is interrupted in many different ways, and society finds it satisfactory to explain things on their own terms, take out of context the justifications they just need to get by, Self hypnotise and self convince (very strong trait) that this is right, (air quotes again) "That all is OK".Doing the right thing on the ot...
Writing and the steps up..
2007-10-31 19:41:00 And here i thought that writing would be easy, u have the idea; Now all u have to do is just put into words...yup that is eassssyyyy!Millions of thoughts, ideas, story lines, all up in my head and when asked if i can write multiple articles, i was so confident i smirked and said sure no problem and man was i wrong!Just cuz u wrote an article and got some good reviews and ppl seem to like, i got cocky (well for a first piece to be written in such great fashion and style, and becuz of that, got offered a job freelance writing in a mag, and i can also proofread and be a critic -everyone is-), who can really blame me..i know i know I'm just too awesome. always was and always will be..not to mention humble.So y not start blogging to work on my witting skills i said to me humble self, polish it up with some reading maybe in the near future attend a workshop (maybe even give one). Hey if i am that good at my first time, imagine when i go pro...I'll kick ass :) or so thought my big over... More About: Writing , Steps
Huh....relatively!
2007-10-27 14:14:00 Greetings from the ancient city "Cairo"; for those unfortunate few (i hope); Cairo is the capital of Egypt which in turn is in Africa, which of course is a continent in Earth, Earth part of a solar system, part of the Milky Way, the mentioned solar system is part of a galaxy, And of course we know that galaxies are part of the smaller universe which is part of a the big one universe..this should make it clear where Cairo is!Just woke up and man where those some weird dreams u just cant darn . i have no recollection none whatsoever but i know this..... WEEEIIIRD! Just hate it when i don't remember what i was dreaming, u never know maybe u solved the big secret to the universe and u feel it but u will never know cuzremember..aahhh!This post is as random as it comes...just wanted to explain the relativity theory in a simple way.. (for those lost the "where is Cairo" part)
Blogging the bloggen (yes its a word) bloggers
2007-10-25 23:13:00 In order to gain some exposure and to raise my page ranks amidst the 100 of 1000s sites, blogs and etc, I'll have to start linking (which i hate to do) and was thinking that if i am to go down linking, be it with style, maybe hyperlinking every and each word with a random corresponding link i find... now how annoying can that be! :DI just gotta mention a great guy who is teaching me the how and whats in the oveblogged Internet . He's tech oriented and u can find interesting stuff on there... (warming up).. a web mastering, page designing, python using, embedded system coding, Wii playing, FX photographing ... Dude. Blogging his mind to the net finally (my first link coming up..), Google him and u'd find the first 2 pages on him and that is impressive. The site is still a new born baby. make sure to check it out. Also find there a link to his gallery on flickr, some neat pics there.That should get me some heat linking to his blog :)PS. don't get mad if u link to all the wrong thi... More About: Word , Bloggers
My first artilog!...the understanding!
2007-10-20 15:34:00 We can assume safely that a large population of the western world thinks of Islam as a religion spread by sword -which of course is totally & utterly untrue. Take Egypt for example, well lets just say if the above mentioned point was true, then by now there would have been no Christians in my country who can read this, let alone be very good friends with-. They (the western people) think that Islam in essence is a violent primitive way of life, which will naturally lead to us all being terrorists (if not retarded) in our modern time.People fear what they not know of, a fact established ages ago (lessons learned from history classes), throw in some misconception and some anti-Islam mass media and you will find it is easy to get the wrong idea, an opinion becomes fact with time if not challenged, and sadly we try to change the perception of Islam to one individual at a time, while what is needed is general awareness to the masses. An American was once asked ?in an effort to measu... More About: Understanding
Intro!
2007-10-20 15:28:00 Hello..blogging world! I start my own blog cuz it just seems its the trend, wanna be hip or kool u gotta blog :Dnah seriuosly i think i have a little something on nothing to share..This should not be mistaken for a blog.. blog! it will be more of writting articles with a bloggy styleneither will it have the hyperlinking aspect of blogs or the citiations and nuterual aspect of articles its what i call "ARTILOG"..get ready for the ride and hope u enjoy it... i know i will! More About: Intro |



