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Sir, can you tell me the time?
2008-03-22 14:11:00 A well dressed business man was walking down the street when a little kid covered in soot said to him respectfully, “Sir, can you tell me the time?” The portly man stopped, carefully unbuttoned his coat and jacket, removed a large watch from a vest pocket, looked at it and said, “It is a quarter ... More About: Time , The Time
Opportunity
2008-03-22 06:10:00 You should always be ready to take on a challenge when opportunity presents itself. After all whats life without a lill bit of risk involved. . . . . © instant Humour - visit the site for more hilarious jokes. ... More About: Opportunity , Funny Pictures
Crossing the road
2008-03-21 22:22:00 A blind man was seen waiting at a street corner with his guide dog. After a short wait the dog started leading the blind man across the street against the red light. First a car comes screeching to a halt inches away from him, but still the dog leads on, then a bicyclist almost wipes them ... More About: Road , Crossing , The Road
The nude statues
2008-03-21 16:49:00 Two nude statues (one male and one female) had been standing in the middle of a beautiful park for 99 years. On their 100th anniversary in the park an angel came down from heaven to talk to the statues. He said to them, “God has been watching you for the past 100 years and has been ... More About: Statues
Blonde Dent Remover
2008-03-21 10:49:00 A blonde was driving home after work, and got caught in a really bad hailstorm. Her car was covered with dents, so the next day she took it to a REPAIR shop. The shop owner saw that she was a blonde, so he decided to have some fun. He told her just to go home and ... More About: Blonde , Sardar
The Pirate
2008-03-21 07:01:00 A seaman meets a pirate in a bar. The pirate has a peg-leg, a hook and an eye patch. “How’d you end up with a peg-leg?” asks the sailor. “I was swept overboard in a storm,” says the pirate. “A shark bit off me whole leg.” “Wow!” said the seaman. “What about the hook?” “We were boarding an ... More About: Pirate
The dog?s duties
2008-03-21 02:05:00 A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children fell to discussing the dog’s duties. “They use him to keep crowds back,” said one youngster. “No,” said another, “he’s just ... More About: Duties
The Poor nun!!
2008-03-20 08:05:00 There was a guy in a bar one night that got really drunk, I mean really, really, really drunk. When the bar closed he got up to go home. As he stumbled out the door he saw a nun walking on the sidewalk. So he stumbled over to the nun and punched her in the face. Well ... More About: Poor
My son is?
2008-03-20 07:00:00 Four Catholic ladies were having coffee. The first Catholic woman tells her friends “My son is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him ‘Father.’” The second Catholic woman chirps, “My son is a bishop. Whenever he walks into a room, people call him ‘Your Grace.’” The third Catholic crone says “My son is a ...
The three legged chicken
2008-03-19 13:03:00 One day a traveling salesman was driving down a back country road at about 30 mph when he noticed that there was a three-legged chicken running alongside his car. He stepped on the gas but at 50 miles per hour. The chicken was still keeping up. After about a mile of running the chicken ran ... More About: Chicken
Little helper
2008-03-19 12:59:00 Little Susie was Mommy’s helper. She helped set the table when company was due for dinner. Soon, everything was on, Mr. Smythe the guest came in, and everyone sat down. Then Mother noticed something was missing… “Susie, dear,” she said, “You didn’t put a knife and fork at Mr. Smythe’s place.” “But, Mommy, I thought he wouldn’t need ... More About: Little Helper
Young Indian cricket team
2008-03-18 13:24:00 Ever wonder what the young Indian Cricket team does when not playing??!! Well I think I have the answer for you . . . . . . © instant Humour - visit the site for more hilarious jokes. ... More About: Funny Pictures , Team , Young
Advanced urine test
2008-03-07 11:48:00 One day Bill complained to his friend, “My elbow really hurts, I guess I should see a doctor.” His friend offered, “Don’t do that. There’s a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker an cheaper than a doctor. Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your ... More About: Test , Urine
Presence of mind
2008-03-03 09:09:00 John works in a supermarket. A man came in and asked John for half a kilogram of butter. The boy told him they only sold 1 kg packets of butter, but the man was persistent. The boy said he’d go ask his manager what to do. John walked into the back room and said, “There’s a ... More About: Mind , Presence
Three Brazilian Soldiers
2008-03-03 07:05:00 © instant Humour - visit the site for more hilarious jokes. ... More About: Funny Pictures , Soldiers , Brazilian
The blonde painter
2008-02-29 13:23:00 A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. “Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?” The blonde ... More About: Blonde , Painter , Sardar
How God balances things!!
2008-02-29 12:54:00 1. A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he wants. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t want. 2. A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. 3. A successful man is one who makes more money ... More About: Things
10 things you don?t like to hear during surgery
2008-02-25 11:38:00 I?ve just recently had a surgery for my right hand and I know how scary it feels just thinking about going under the knife. I had a good laugh reading this joke today. But seriously - these are 10 things that I surely don?t want to hear my doctor say? * Has anyone seen my watch? * ... More About: Hear , Surgery , Things
Football demystified
2008-02-25 11:28:00 A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right at the fifty yard line. It was exciting too, a real nail biter. After the game, he asked her if she had a good time. ?Oh, I really liked it,? she replied, ?especially the tightpants and all the big muscles, ... More About: Football , Sardar
The blonde Patient in pain
2008-02-25 11:20:00 A girl says to her doctor, ?You have to help me. I hurt all over.? She touches her right knee with her index finger and says, ?Ow! That hurts.? She touches her left cheek with her index finger and says, ?Ouch! That hurts, too.? She touches her right earlobe with her index finger and says, ... More About: Pain , Blonde , Patient , Sardar
MasterCard Moments 4
2008-02-18 09:57:00 © instant Humour - visit the site for more hilarious jokes. ... More About: Funny Pictures , Moments , Mastercard
Cool break-up
2008-01-23 06:21:00 A soldier stationed in Afghanistan recently received a letter from his girl friend back home. It read as follows: Dear Ricky, I can no longer continue our relationship. The distance between us is just too great. I’m sorry. Please return the picture of me that I sent to you. Love, Becky The soldier, with hurt feelings, asked his fellow soldiers ... More About: Break Up , Cool , Break
How Share Markets work?
2008-01-22 13:10:00 While I am talking monkey, here’s one more joke that I had received a long time ago. I had totally forgotten it. But I remembered this one after seeing the stock markets around the world crash in the last few days. A man and his assistant walked into a village and stated that they would buy ... More About: Markets , Work , Share
Monkey talk
2008-01-22 13:04:00 A week ago Australian cricketer, Andrew Symmonds, lodged a complaint against Indian Off spinner Harbhajan Singh accusing Harbhajan of making racial comments against him. Symmonds claimed that Harbhajan singh called him a “MONKEY”. After a hearing Harbhajan was banned for 3 test matches. Well I think it wasn’t Harbhajan’s mistake. What if he googled for “Monkey ” and ... More About: Talk
Sardar?s Job Interview
2008-01-18 10:31:00 A sardarji goes for a job interview in an office. The interviewer starts with the basics. “So, Mr., can you tell us your age, please?” The sardarji counts carefully on his fingers for half a minute before replying. “Um … 22.” The interviewer tries another straightforward one to break the ice. “And can you tell us your height, ... More About: Interview , Sardar
Yoga Postures
2008-01-10 12:45:00 Caution: This version of the posture requires considerable strength in neck, shoulder and back, requiring years of practice to achieve. It should not be attempted without supervision. But, an Irish gentleman has come up with a new and ingenious way to perform these Yogic postures very easily. . . . . . . . . . . . He claims only 6 pegs of whiskey can get anybody to ... More About: Yoga , Funny Pictures
Changes in English language
2008-01-10 06:42:00 Recently I had pointed out so many inconsistencies & difficulties in English language. It seems that its not just me. Having chosen English as the preferred language in the EEC, the European Parliament has commissioned a feasibility study in ways of improving efficiency in communications between Government departments. European officials have often pointed out that English spelling ... More About: English Language , Language
Little Johnny?s assignment on childbirth
2008-01-09 07:27:00 Little Johnny was assigned a paper on childbirth and asked his mother, “How was I born?” “The stork brought you to us.” “Oh,” said Little Johnny. “Well, how did you and daddy get born?” he asked. “Oh, the stork brought us too.” “So. . . how were grandpa and grandma born?” “Well, darling, the stork brought them too,” said ...
Mamma Bear
2008-01-08 10:02:00 This woman has surely done a lot of introspection. And sure enough she knows what she wants. If at all life was that easy © instant Humour - visit the site for more hilarious jokes. ... More About: Bear
MasterCard Moments 3
More articles from this author:2008-01-07 13:20:00 © instant Humour - visit the site for more hilarious jokes. ... More About: Funny Pictures , Moments , Mastercard , Aster 1, 2, 3 |
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