Julius Bloop - Comedy for Weirdos Julius Bloop - Comedy for Weirdos Potatoes, Fraggles and other crap for weirdos to read. Julius Bloop is the original comedy blog of Kevin Lieber. Ranging from satirical editorials, stream of consciousness jokes, comics, cartoons and even short films. 
Articles
Jolene Bloop - Text Messaging
2008-03-28 06:40:00 Jolene Bloop - Text Messaging Jolene is having, literally, the worst day of her life and Stacy interrupts by texting her current exploits with some guy named Craig. More About: Text Messaging
Puppet Porn Outsells Human Porn On The Streets of Sesame
2008-03-27 04:37:00 A change of clothing can alter your outlook on life. The transition from pajama pants to jeans is equivalent to giving a dirty hobo a hot shower or giving an old virgin a huge pile of sex. Sunday is national time travel day. Weird Al Yankovic and Tenacious D are decent but the best musical comedy act ... More About: Human , Sesame , Streets , The Streets , Puppet
Diary of a World of Warcraft Player - These Kids Have No Game
2008-03-26 01:16:00 I am at the mercy of children for approximately 86 hours per week. I speak, of course, of my time spent in the World of Warcraft . I am a Gnome Warlock, a Master Alchemist and an Auction House tycoon. I rule. I try to be friendly to the children who play this game. There are lots of ... More About: Diary , Kids , Editorials
New buttons, network and diaper meat.
2008-03-25 21:24:00 Dear readers, I would like to bring to your attention the new buttons located in the sidebar that link to various Julius Bloop productions. They’re a sexier way to promote The Journey of Merrill, Potato Trash, Hobo Village and Agent Kootex. Now, I would also like to know who has been accessing JuliusBloop.com by googling “diaper meat”. ... More About: Meat , Network , Diaper , Buttons
Uninformed Reviews - Movies: March 2008
2008-03-24 09:05:00 March is when a film you’ve never heard of - fails to become a classic you’ll never forget! Horton Hears A Who Based on a children?s book written by Walt Disney that was inspired by a comedy routine by Laurel and Hardy that was influenced by an encounter between a mentally disabled child and an intoxicated Babe ... More About: Movies , Reviews , March , March 2008 , 2008
Maybe This Only Amuses Me - David Lynch: Problem Solver #4
2008-03-22 19:54:00 David Lynch: Problem Solver #4 Chris Dotson has created a series of YouTube videos impersonating surrealist film director David Lynch. For those unfamiliar with the legendary artist, check out this hysterical video where Lynch explains his opinion of viewing movies on a cellphone. Dotson’s Lynch impersonation is spot on and this particular episode includes Twin Peak’s Log ... More About: David , David Lynch
Jolene Bloop - LOL Catz
2008-03-21 06:30:00 Jolene Bloop - LOL Catz Jolene blogs from a new location and is surprised to find something disgusting in a familiar area.
Nickelodeon?s Kocain Kids Karnival Is Kancelled
2008-03-20 08:12:00 We all need to re-consider our snap judgments of certain types of people. For instance, perhaps crackheads need the undeniable energy of crack rock because they are really ambitious. A meat thermometer is still the most accurate way to test the hotness of a piece of meat. After insertion, measure the time it takes for ... More About: Kids , Nickelodeon
5 Secret Ways To Generate Traffic For Your Blog (I Mean My Blog)
2008-03-18 07:40:00 Jesus and the Bible are important. So is Israel, Iraq, the War on Terror and 9/11. Let’s face it, at the end of the day, parenting and diet tips are hard to come by. Does Osama Bin Laden wonder how single or gay parents effectively raise children or where iron chefs like Rachael Ray and ... More About: Traffic , Editorials , Blog , Secret
2008 Floating Together Calendar - On Sale Now
2008-03-17 03:41:00 JuliusBloop.com is proud to unveil the 2008 Floating Together Calendar . The perfect gift for Mother’s Day or other calendar-gifting appropriate events. Julius Bloop’s marketing and research development team realizes it may appear silly to release a calendar three months into the new year because the calendar-starved masses have, no doubt, been satiated and all other ... More About: Updates , Sale
Maybe This Only Amuses Me - Geena Davis Sketchies II Entry
2008-03-15 20:57:00 Geena Davis : Heaven On Wheels YouTube is currently holding a sketch comedy contest called Sketchies II. The criteria was simply to create a funny video that included music and a road trip. Well, as you can imagine, the majority of the twenty videos you can vote for are hack in concept, obnoxious in execution, and produced ... More About: Geena Davis , Entry
Jolene Bloop - Candy
2008-03-14 07:48:00 Jolene Bloop - Candy Jolene deals with public ridicule as a chance encounter with a crude child leaves her questioning her figure. Can she continue to seek solace in her beloved candy - M & M’s?
Tom Brady Look-a-like Locates Earth?s Vagina
2008-03-13 03:27:00 Dogs and cats are boring. I want an exotic pet…like a flying squirrel, a fruit bat or a drag queen. Drag queens account for 40% of the makeup market. It isn?t all for their faces, though. Some of it is needed for the thick circle of lipstick they apply to their tucked away penis holes. Single dudes ... More About: Tom Brady , Earth , Brady , Vagina
Revisionist History - Eli Whitney Discovers Blueberries
2008-03-11 05:13:00 On a beautiful summer’s day in Bacontown, Georgia, Eli Whitney decided to take a break from cotton gin inventing to stroll around his enormous plantation. Feeling adventurous, he took an unfamiliar path and noticed a strange sun-drenched plant. “What the fuck is this shit?” Whitney rhetorically asked the bizarre shrub. Mildly confused and sort’ve intrigued, Whitney grabbed a handful of the mysterious blue-balled fruit and stuffed it directly into his fat, ugly face. Elated and fully aroused, Whitney hobbled back to his luxurious log cabin and startled his smelly, haggard wife with pantaloons filled with his juicy new discovery and a pair of blue-stained lips. “Did you unclog the outhouse with your face, Eli?” she asked bitchingly. “Brarboo, brarboo, broo!” Whitney managed to mutter despite hundreds of semi-mashed blueberries occupying his cavernous 19th century mouth. Frustrated with her aloof husband, Mrs. Whitney shooed him out the door by threatening to clon... More About: History
Uninformed Reviews: Videogames - March 2008
2008-03-10 02:29:00 March comes in like a lion and out like a sheep. This month features a few titles that are King of the Jungle as well as a couple sleep-inducing games that’ll have you counting sheep. Fortunately, these lions of gaming are crapping cotton. Super Smash Bros. Brawl Fraternal blood is shed as the Baldwin brothers, Wayans and ... More About: Reviews , Videogames , March , March 2008 , 2008
Jolene Bloop - The Haircut Song
2008-03-07 08:39:00 Jolene Bloop - The Haircut Song Jolene gets an awful haircut and decides to inform the world by writing a song about it on her brother’s acoustic guitar.
KKK Lynch Alligator In Attempt To Prove They Just Really Like Hanging Stuff
2008-03-06 07:06:00 People who talk to their dogs in public as if they were children should spend a moment with the lady on the 7-Eleven bench that talks to a diaper-wearing teddy bear. Everyone will learn a valuable lesson. Well, not the crazy teddy bear lady ? she?ll just wipe the bear?s ass with newspaper and slam ... More About: Stuff , Alligator , Prove
Craigslist Personal Ads Are Full Of Weirdos
2008-03-04 03:41:00 The internet is a great place to find a soul mate. Simply type a list of your favorite movies or briefly explain your interest in food and Cupid’s arrow will be arriving shortly. Craigslist personal ads have a particular knack for being at times bizarre, confusing and quite often embarrassing. Let’s take a look at ... More About: Personal , Full
Miserable Traveler Can?t Wait To Visit The Next Stupid Country
2008-03-03 07:58:00 Where is my luggage? The flight?s delayed…again? Well, hurry up so I can get to my next horrible destination. Why did I come to Paris anyway? The people are indignant; the architecture is only impressive in postcard-form and the whole place reaks of rolled cigarettes and infidelity. I can?t wait to travel someplace equally terrible. Last ... More About: Country , Editorials , Stupid , Visit , Wait
Jolene Bloop - Tramp Stamp
2008-02-29 09:51:00 Jolene Bloop - Tramp Stamp Jolene defies her parent’s wishes and gets a cliche tattoo on her lower back. Can she justify its presence?
Menstruation Queen Silences Critics - Fills Kiddie Pool
2008-02-28 09:58:00 “Cracker” is a Caucasian-targeted derogatory term that clearly references saltines - because Ritz crackers are noticeably tanner than I am. Graham crackers are the athletes of cracker town…but don?t tell them that. It?s a good thing humans can?t carry things ten times their body weight like ants. Trees would get their asses kicked by drunk ... More About: Queen , Pool , Critics
Maybe This Only Amuses Me - Garth Marenghi?s Darkplace Clip
2008-02-27 08:23:00 Garth Marenghi - I’m A One Track Lover This is a short clip from a british show recently picked up by Adult Swim called Garth Marenghi’s Darkplace. The show is a completely outlandish satire of 80’s horror/sci fi and is a must see if you’re a fan of absurd humor. It’s honestly the most ridiculous show ... More About: Clip
Uninformed Reviews: Movies - February
2008-02-25 21:04:00 What a popcorn-chompingly good black history month it has been. A person could get so caught up in the glow of the silver screen that they forget to do their taxes! Seriously, I forgot to do my taxes and the government is coming after me. So I’m hiding in the back row of the local ... More About: Movies , Reviews , February
Jolene Bloop - Makeup? Whatever!
2008-02-22 10:56:00 Jolene Bloop - Makeup ? Whatever! Jolene is fighting with her mother because of her inability to properly apply makeup. But she’ll show you! She’ll show the whole internet she looks like a celebrity!
Craigslist Personal Ads Are Full Of Weirdos
2008-02-20 21:22:00 The internet is a great place to find a soul mate. Simply type a list of your favorite movies or briefly explain your interest in food and Cupid’s arrow will be arriving shortly. Craigslist personal ads have a particular knack for being at times bizarre, confusing and quite often embarrassing. Let’s take a look at ... More About: Personal , Full
The Top 5 Songs That Should Be Banished
2008-02-18 06:04:00 Having grown disgruntled with hearing the same handful of awful songs all the time - I’ve decided to ban some of them. Feel free to add your own submissions to the list by commenting. Satisfaction (The Rolling Stones) Okay, maybe not a lifetime ban since it was once a pretty great song but lets please put it on hiatus. Five years should suffice. Not only will the classic Keith Richards guitar lick not sound during this mandatory sentence but no one is allowed to mention it as the greatest rock song of all time, either. Shut up. AC/DC (Post Bon Scott) Think of an AC/DC song that Brian Johnson “sings” and that’s the one that should be banned. Just pick one – they’re all exactly the same. Back In Black, Thuderstruck, Hell’s Bells, You Shook Me All Night Long, For Those About To Rock, Have A Drink On Me, Highway to Hell. All gone. Forever. Sorry, Coors Light fans. Sweet Child O’ Mine (Guns & Roses) Slash’s guitar lick is great - too bad it’s been sucked thro... More About: Songs , Banished
Jolene Bloop - I’m Goin’ For It
2008-02-15 08:35:00 Jolene Bloop - I’m Goin’ For It Jolene is getting racy and threatening to show you her boobs. She’s also ready to share a very personal story about an encounter with an older man at her favorite dive bar. Will she go for it?
Uncle Goink?s Banjo Time Turns Creepily Into Uncle Goink?s Manjo Time
2008-02-14 07:18:00 You know you?re getting old when you can?t eat certain foods anymore. I used to inhale cheese-slathered beef nachos and my iron stomach wouldn?t waver. Now, I need to confirm the distance to the nearest restroom before sipping a glass of vitamin water. My first menstruation is going to be scary because I don?t ... More About: Time , Uncle
Maybe This Only Amuses Me - Late Night with David Letterman Short Film
2008-02-12 19:30:00 Chris Elliott - The Traveling Poet Chris Elliott is possibly the most underappreciated comedian of the last twenty five years. He spent a long time with David Letterman doing various skits until he landed his own sitcom on Fox called Get A Life. The show was too funny and too weird for its own good (see: ... More About: Film , Night , Late
Revisionist History - The Biography of Rosie O?Donnell
More articles from this author:2008-02-12 01:18:00 *Revisionist History is an ignorant, irreverent and often grossly inaccurate look at the past. Enjoy!* Bloated and gay. It?s been a long, hard road to stardom for the surly comedian from Huntington, New York. The only daughter of Don and Doris O?Donnell, young Roseanne was prone to sneaking out of the house to perform stand ... More About: Biography , Editorials , Rosie O , Rosie 1, 2, 3, 4 |
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