monkeychapps monkeychapps A humorous blog. Humor, but not the funny kind.
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Articles
Snow war, day 2
2008-03-09 20:03:00 It is hard for me to believe that a man with a perfectly good snow blower would revert to a shovel for any other reasons than to try to show me up. That?s what my neighbor did. Somehow I think I might have disrespected his manhood by implying that a fit younger man is a ... More About: Snow
Dom or Sub
2008-03-08 23:41:00 I find it way to common these days that women think a little spanking and dirty talk constitutes a Dom/sub relationship. With that in mind here is a list of things that you may expect from this true Dom. 1 I might call you name like scullery maid, poopy pants or maybe just not complement you ...
Costco skull-duggery
2008-03-08 09:33:00 It is for you, Costco hot-dogs, that I endure the scorn and hatred of the girls at the Costco snack center. It is for you that I endure the looks of disgust and contept. This is my tale. My tale of the lengths I will go to to enjoy your buttery goodness. Your tasty hotdoggedness. (I made ... More About: Skull
Hurry, it?s a blowout sale!
2008-03-07 09:19:00 Hurry, I?m lowering my standards faster than I can violate them. Its a crazy blowout sale of hygiene/moral/personal or religious standards. 20 years older than me? Not a problem! Morbidly(not just chubby) obese? Great! Missing a few teeth? Who isn?t? Sores and lesions? OK! No job? You?re a free spirit baby! Sit around all day watching TV? Broadening your horizons! Schizophrenic/OCD/ just plane ... More About: Sale
So it begins
2008-03-07 09:18:00 I?m not sure about the proper etiquette when it comes to snow removal from ones driveway. I grew up in the southwest and it was never an issue. The snow fell last night and a few inches are covering my driveway. I got out the snow shovel and started at it. After a few minutes ...
IT in 2001
2008-03-06 03:40:00 Dear reader, I worked customer service for many years and have many “stupid” stories. None of these stories compare to any IT professionals stories. I know a few IT guys and they all have the patience of saints and are usually very funny guys/ladies. Keep in mind that this was written in 2001 but is still hilarious. Tech ... More About: News , Media
God did smite me with great smoteness
2008-03-06 00:42:00 What else could go wrong? Auto-immune disorder that causes me to get painful boils every now and then, been there. Losing everything that I owned in the last year , child’s play. Losing my hair and then getting ringworm on my bald head? That’s a new one. Wow, thats pretty messed up. I didn’t see that one coming. Is ... More About: Great
So you want to get her back?
2008-03-05 09:17:00 Here?s some ?quality? advice for all those guys out there who just got dumped. (You?re welcome.) O.K. This is how it goes. You get an orangutan. I?m not talking a monkey or some dancing chimp BS, I mean a damn orangutan. Don?t ask me how you?re gonna get an orangutan that?s not my problem. So the ... More About: Family , Friends , Back
Obama, Clinton and McCain
2008-02-19 11:53:00 What a sad state of affairs we have when this motley crew are all that we have to choose from. Could you imagine hearing her voice for years to come? I swear that the brown noise is embedded in all of her speeches. I just want to hood her like a falcon so she will ... More About: Obama , Clinton
Caption contest
2008-02-18 20:41:00 You all submitted great captions in the past, here is another. Bookmark It Hide Sites More About: Contest , Random , Caption
More funny for you
2008-02-17 08:56:00 As I search the blog-o-dome I have found a few sites which raise the standard of funny and craziness. hashitout.com and www.gorillasushi.com Enjoy them as I have. Bookmark It Hide Sites More About: Funny , Random
Personals
2008-02-16 23:42:00 From time to time I will read the personals section of my local paper mainly to see if I can recognize anyone I know and then make fun of them. I see the same theme running thoughout most posts. ” No drinkers, no slackers, no mama’s boys, no druggies” bla bla bla. I can conclude ... More About: Personals
Disabilities? No uber-abilities! part 2
More articles from this author:2008-02-16 22:18:00 “You are left handed too, cool”! That’s what I hear as often as “your handwriting is horrible”. I was born right handed but because of nerve damage I had to learn to use my left and thusly my handwriting is not great. Very legible but not great. Most people are very impressed that I can even ... More About: Part , Disabilities 1, 2 |
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