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Portuguese for dummies

Portuguese for dummies
Satire about portuguese way of life, written in English


Question #7: How do Portuguese people pay their debts?
2007-03-20 14:27:00
Well, let's for instance read this letter, that was published in a Port uguese newspaper. It says this: "The Client is always right!""This letter was sent by a client of a famous mobile operator. This letter is not an hoax, and was sent by a guy with debts to one of the credit companies (as he tells in his letter).""Dear readers, This is the 8th juridical letter to pay my debts that I receive from you Sirs...I know that I do not have my payrolls updated. It happens that I am owning also to other shops, and all of them expect me to pay. Meanwhile, my monthly wage only allows me to pay two installments per month. the others are for the following month. I am not being unfair, the kind of guy that prefers to pay to that one or that other shop, forgetting the others. No! In every month, when I receive my wage, I write the names of my creditors in small pieces of paper, that I roll and put in a box. Looking to the side, I select two of them, that are the "Lucky" ones that will get my dear...
More About: People , Question , Debt , Portuguese
Question #6: How are the Portuguese politicians on the EU?
2007-03-09 14:51:00
Portuguese politicians are amongst the most cunning and hard-working men from all Europe. they care about Portuguese's worries, and they are always active to defend our concerns.See, for example, EU parliament member José Maia, who is waiting patiently the moment to speak to the EU parliament about important matters... music is from Romana, a Portuguese female singer.
More About: Question , Port , Politicians , Portuguese , Quest
Question #5: What is Desenrascanço?
2007-03-06 17:55:00
Desenrascanço is one of the features that Portuguese people are famous for. The Wikipedia page of Desenrascanço, unfortunately was ripped off, but miraculously I managed to recover parts of them, even the picture that illustrated the Desenrascanço. Here it goes: Desenrascanço (loosely translatable as "disentanglement") is a Portuguese word used, in common language, to express an ability to solve a problem without having the knowledge or the adequate tools to do so, by use of imaginative resources or by applying knowledge to new situations. Achieved when resulting in a hypothetical good-enough solution. When that good solution doesn't occur we got a failure (enrascanço - entanglement). It is taught, more or less, informally in some Portuguese institutions, such as universities, navy or army. Portuguese people, strongly believe it to be one of the their most valued virtues and a living part of their culture. Desenrascanço, in fact, is the opposite of planning, but managing for the p...
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Question #4: How fearful is the Portuguese Army?
2007-02-22 06:13:01
We have the finest military army of all the World, maybe from all the Europe! We have lots of military bases, full of strong and smart soldiers, ready to invade Spain if they beat us at a soccer game.Just see for yourself: this is an exercise of the Port uguese army at Lisbon, on the shores of the Tagus river, in the city of Seixal. Just look how cunning are our men. Be our allies or be afraid! Be very afraid!!
More About: Question , Army , Fear , Portuguese
Question #3: Are Portuguese people talented?
2007-02-18 18:10:01
Yes. We have a show, called "Aqui há talento" (something like "Here we have talent"), where talented people from all over the country show their talents in a live audience, and are evaluated by 3 rough judges. Many thanks to sUPERgAIOLAS for sharing this.This buddy imitated:- An old train- A sheep- A "graniza" (a kind of bird)- A bull- A pig- A pig (on the death row)- A cat- A dogThis show is fertile with talented people like this guy. I guess I'll post more of them later.
More About: People , Question , Port , Portuguese , Quest
Question #2: Do Portuguese people like fashion?
2007-02-10 00:06:01
We LOVE fashion. We are just like sheeps, always following the other sheeps, and eating the available grass. Our shopping centers always have stores with the latest trends in fashion. And regarding jeans, we are the best!It's pretty common to see the stores selling trousers with that "weared", "spent" and "dumped in a bucket of bleach" look, so in, so trendy. This store, for instance, is selling a new look: a "trolha" look!"Trolha" is a man who works in the construction of buildings. It goes there in the back of a truck, and they normally wear working clothes, that is, old clothes. When they paint the house, they splatter the paint on their clothes, but they don't mind. It's cool. Now, you can be a "trolha" just by buing this fabulous trousers by 25 euros. You don't even have to make cement!! Genius!
More About: People , Fashion , Question , Port , Portuguese
Question #1: Do portuguese people have a sense of humour?
2007-02-09 12:05:02
Well, of course! We never miss an opportunity to make everyone smile and laugh. Take, for instance, this poster inside a big Port uguese supermarket, "Continente". The poster advertises Portuguese fruit, and features a nice guy with nice lemons (yes, he is a little chubby, and I bet that he doesn't eat fruit THAT much). Well, somebody took some stickers from those apples and placed them in strategic places, so that the chubby guy looks now very menacing and funny. See? Portuguese people can be humorous even with a couple of fruit stickers, and while they are bored inside a supermarket, they make everyone laugh. That classical hole-in-the-teeth is always a guaranteed laugh.
More About: Humour , Sense , People , Question
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