Joeprah - Anecdotes of a Stay at Home DadJoeprah - Anecdotes of a Stay at Home DadWhy is a stay home dad's life funny? Stop by and find out. Its all about the kids! Articles
Confessions of a Stay at Home Dad: Part III
2008-05-24 08:19:00 For more from this series check the first post here (content/view/203/), and the second post here (content/view/224/).Part III Along the journey of the pregnancy, Jodi was again poked and prodded by doctors. She was administered tests and in an out of hospital gowns for a total of six sonograms, and seemed to become numb to all the invasiveness that she so dreaded in the past. I never wanted to know what the sex of our baby was, but it was Jodi’s intention to find out and since she was carrying and having the baby I felt it best to respect her wishes. I mean, if she hadn’t been already she was quickly turning into my hero. We found out we were having a girl and as it turned out the first of three. We chose the name Isabella, got our bags packed and waited for the day to arrive. Then it happened. Just when I thought I couldn’t be more impressed with my wife, she went into labor. It started with the “bloody show.” Now, for all of you guys out the... More About: Confessions , Home , Stay
Shaved Joeprah?
2008-05-23 15:10:00 So, my wife has told me for sometime now that she likes me with a goatee and she says that it somehow (I know crazy right?) it makes me ever more of a hottie. She later told me that it made me look like Patrick Dempsey and that was a good thing. So, for months, scratch that, more like a few years, I have been walking around with a goatee because I thought it made me more like this dude or w/e that she thought looked like me. Anyways, last night I was toiling away on yet another masterpiece of a video I sat down and gave Hot Wife a foot message as she watched Grey's Anatomy. I stiffled my vomit as they all seemingly made-out with each other the entire time. Then, finally Patrick Dempsey appeared on the screen and he had no goatee. I was all like WTFudge! Today, without Hot Wife's approval or permission, I shaved the sucker off...well virtually. I have some stubble...I have way over analyzed this thing. Click on my pic and get a glimpse of me without goatee--remembe...
The Guys Only Wine Club
2008-05-22 23:13:00 So, if you are familiar with Joeprah and my constant pursuit of equality in this screwed up society we live in, you will remember I was denied access to a neighborhood wine club simply because I have a penis. It was an ovary only club and my first reaction was, of course, anger. That night (after being turned away) I burned some of my wife's bras, sunk into a deep depression that lasted until the next morning when I had some chocolate milk (it always cheers me up) and began to analyze the topic to death (here). (content/view/189/1/) But, like any true warrior, I did not accept the ladies denying me as ultimate failure. I fought through it. I found myself my own group of fellas that could stand me long enough to sit down and have a few glasses of wine with yours truly. I fought fire with fire so to speak. The results? Well, let's just check the tape shall we...fs9aYI3Hxik Clearly, they were wrong to keep me out of their club. Why turn away all that I have to offer? ... More About: Wine , Club , Guys
You and Your Voyeuristic Child
2008-05-21 13:30:00 I think there is absolutely ‘a time’ when, as a dad to daughters, you notice, “You know what, being naked around the girls feels weird.” This naked awareness is a cultural change in a household like ours that is used to having young kids just bumbling in on my wife and I when we are getting dressed. I mean, lately I have been getting the impression that my 8 year old, who I have made an effort to not be naked around for a little while now, is on a secret scientific mission to gather data about her naked father and make him feel completely uncomfortable in the process. It didn’t happen gradually either, I mean for her perhaps, but when you notice a kid staring at you in the shower and they have nothing to say, you can’t help but to feel self conscious. My 8 year old now looks at me differently when I am getting dressed, undressed, and especially when I am recently out of the shower (see hawt). Our house has a split brain personality when it co... More About: Child
Dropps: How Cool Kids Do Their Laundry
2008-05-20 09:41:00 Dropps (http://www.dropps.com) isn’t an easy to find product (yet), it is pretty clear to see that it owns the jug-o-detergent. I am not a paid representative of Dropps, but I wouldn’t turn down free samples (ahem) if anyone from Dropps noticed this post. So, here’s the recap: Dropps are easier to use and better for the environment than the old bulky detergents out there, why not give them a try? Special Thanks to Assistant Joeprah Editor:Mrs. Whimsy (http://www.mrswhimsy.blogspot.com/) More About: Kids , Laundry , Cool , Cool Kids
Indiana Jones 4: A Blind Movie Review
2008-05-19 22:33:00 First, you might be asking yourself, “Why is this a blind movie review?” The answer is, “Seriously, it isn’t in theaters yet. So, I am reviewing totally on instinct, and trust me that’s enough” Anyways, as you may or may not know—Harrison Ford is freakin’ old. I mean, he is what I consider old for a fist throwing, cavern jumping spelunker. Dude was born in 1942. That makes him….carry the 4….really old. He turns 66 on July 13th and part of his legacy will be an arthritic Indiana Jones flailing around against an obvious blue screen, fighting off predictable sophisticated and unsophisticated baddies all to the worn out theme song that seems to be playing anytime I switch on the TV. No disrespect, but I am more afraid of the guy on the right (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnDdN8W5A L8) than Indiana Jones at this point. Really, have you even seen some of the interviews? Harrison looks more like a retirement home... More About: Movie , Movie Review , Review
Word of the Day: Volume VIII
2008-05-18 10:52:00 In this episode, Professor Toddler visits the world of music to bring us another word in toddlerese. Sit back and enjoy another cute video courtesy of Team Joeprah. MI-b0MdQKjI More About: Word , Volume , Word of the Day
Top Nine Reasons Why Moms Primarily Read Mom Blogs
2008-05-15 23:06:00 * Warning: if you get offended over satirical posts; first, shame on you; second, you may skip this post and wait for something simpler in design *I think many other dad bloggers may have noticed that once they have categorized themselves as a “dad blogger” they have almost instantly given themselves a mortal blog wound. What I mean is that many female/mom bloggers don’t give men/daddy bloggers the time of day simply because of their protuberance. I have noticed many times in the past that moms will leave me comments like, “I don’t normally read dad blogs, but…” or “I told myself that I wouldn’t read any dad blogs, but…” or “The ladies in my sewing circle are going to kill me for reading your blog, but…” I know there are quite a few ladies that don’t subscribe to this philosophy, I call them Joeprah/Busy Dad (http://busydadblog.com) readers, but there are many ladies that just don&rs... More About: Blogs , Read , Reasons , Moms
Nerve Conduction Test: A Blogging Related Injury
2008-05-14 15:12:00 So, I see a neurologist every six months because I have mild retardation (see juvenile myoclonus (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Juvenile_my oclonic_epilepsy)) and in-between recent visits I developed some numbness (left pinky and ring finger) and discomfort in my left elbow. Apparently, I do not subscribe to proper posture when I am in full-blog-mode (see sloucher pictured left) and the fact that I rest my head on my left hand via elbow support is somehow not helpful. On my visit last week, my doctor told me that there is a chance the nerve may heal on its own if I change my habits, but there was also a chance that I may need surgery (nothing big, an out-patient dealy). But, I was told I did need to schedule an EMG or Nerve Conduction Study/Test (http://www.webmd.com/brain/electromyogra m-emg-and-nerve-conduction-studies) and today was the day. I really had no expectations going into the study other than I knew that it would take about an hour. It wasn’t until I was i... More About: Injury , Blogging , Related
I Said What: Volume II
2008-05-14 07:02:00 The kids had a rough day today, they lost a long time friend in “Winnie” our oldest cat. He died in his sleep last night and my wife and I found him amidst my shoes in the nether reaches of our closet. So, as a treat after dinner we went out for ice cream/snow balls at Rita’s a once local tradition that has now spread like wild fire in the mid-Atlantic. Anyways, we came home with gelatis, custard cones with sprinkles and sticky hands. The kids went out back to finish their cones when, predictably, our youngest (professor toddler) dropped her cone. An aside on kids and ice cream cones, as a parent you can count on your kid dropping part of their ice cream cone almost 100% of the time up until age 4. Back to the dropped ice cream, at first our toddler started whining but soon she looked at the fallen ice cream as an opportunity to experiment. I don’t know what possesses a kid to do this, but she started stomping on the ice cream in sandals. From our bac... More About: Volume
Exterminator Protocol
2008-05-12 20:22:00 So, tomorrow I have a exterminator coming out to look at our ant problem. We have ants, not many and not the big ones. We have little annoying ants. For the first three years in our new house I was able to battle them tooth and claw and I was always able to mount a superior defense (allbeit temporary) against these little buggers using my trusty caulk gun and bug spray. When they would come in for the next attack I was always able to find out how and stop them cold. You know the dad in the movie Christmas Story? How fanatical he was with fuses? That's me and bugs. I hate them: they hate me. It is fated. Ying and the yang. Anyways, tomorrow I have finally relented and called in back-up as I can't find the source of how the ants are A) getting in and B) staying in. I caulked everywhere I could think of. I even used that spray foam insulation in the basement. You know the stuff that is so friggin' strong that if you get it on your skin you can just kiss that ... More About: Protocol , Exterminator
Happy Mother's Day Hot Wife
2008-05-12 18:43:00 Here is a fun video I took yesterday with the Hot Wife . She really, really, really hates being on camera and I think it really is undetectable. She looks really pretty here (as usual). Happy Mother's Day (again). You are the best!46FX34PqJng
Contest Update III
2008-05-12 11:45:00 Here we are again. Another contest update for the first ever Independence Day Contest at Joeprah.com. I am slightly late getting this update out, as I said I would do a contest (content/view/204/1/) update every two weeks, but a long weekend and a busy Monday put this post off until the end of the day. My bad. Once again I will introduce our contestants. There are some late entrants and I wanted to make sure everyone visiting could see the complete list of bloggers involved in the bloggy death match. So, here we are--the contestants:First, we have MileHighDad (http://www.milehighdad.net/). MHD is another stay at home dad blogger and just was mentioned in Woman's World. He is a heck of a nice guy and is very involved in his young son's life as you can tell by his blog which includes movies of his boy dominating at soccer and photos that his son takes with their digital camera.Melisa from Suburban Scrawl (http://thesuburbanscrawl.blogspot.com/) is another particip... More About: Update
Contest Update II
2008-05-12 11:45:00 As promised, I said I would do a contest (content/view/204/1/) update every two weeks, for those involved, in the first ever Independence Day Contest at Joeprah.com. I did my first update on May 12th to kick things off and this update is to keep everyone aprised of where they stand. Once again I will introduce our contestants. There are some late entrants and I wanted to make sure everyone visiting could see the complete list of bloggers involved in the bloggy death match. So, here we are--the contestants:First, we have MileHighDad (http://www.milehighdad.net/). MHD is another stay at home dad blogger and just was mentioned in Woman's World. He is a heck of a nice guy and is very involved in his young son's life as you can tell by his blog which includes movies of his boy dominating at soccer and photos that his son takes with their digital camera.Melisa from Suburban Scrawl (http://thesuburbanscrawl.blogspot.com/) is another participant and perhaps one of the nic... More About: Update
Contest Update I
2008-05-12 11:45:00 As promised, I said I would do a contest (content/view/204/1/) update for those involved the first ever Independence Day Contest at Joeprah.com this Monday to kick things off. First, let's start off by introducing the contestants:First, we have MileHighDad (http://www.milehighdad.net/). MHD is another stay at home dad blogger and just was mentioned in Woman's World. He is a heck of a nice guy and is very involved in his young son's life as you can tell by his blog which includes movies of his boy dominating at soccer and photos that his son takes with their digital camera.Melisa from Suburban Scrawl (http://thesuburbanscrawl.blogspot.com/) is another participant and perhaps one of the nicest people I have met in the last few month from blogland. She is a published author and blogs about this and that and everything in between at her blog. RDH Mom (http://rdhmom.blogspot.com/), is a dental hygientist from Canada that has a tight knit family and she openly blogs abo... More About: Update
Discovering Joeprah
2008-05-10 09:55:00 Like a sunrise enveloping a valley town with golden light, I have been featured in the series Spotlight on Dads over at Discovering Dad (http://discoveringdad.blogspot.com/2008/ 05/spotlight-on-dads-joeprah.html). Seriously though, Jeremy (http://discoveringdad.blogspot.coml) asked me some tough questions and like, well, just about anyone on Dr. Phil's couch, I basically told all about what makes Joeprah tick and left a few tears behind in the process. If you are interested in finding out more about Joeprah in the least, I suggest swinging by and checking it out. The series is great, the questions lend to an introspective interview (http://discoveringdad.blogspot.com/2008/ 05/spotlight-on-dads-joeprah.html) and, ahem, I am friggin' off the hook (http://discoveringdad.blogspot.com/2008/ 05/spotlight-on-dads-joeprah.html). It is a one of its kind Joeprah exclusive (http://discoveringdad.blogspot.com/2008/ 05/spotlight-on-dads-joeprah.html) you won't find anywhere el...
Mr. Mom's Day?
2008-05-09 20:43:00 As I went out shopping for gifts for my wife and both of our mothers, I began to notice how society markets gifts for moms. Really what started it all was that I was having a hard time finding the right card for my wife because a good majority of cards are designed with the traditional roles of men and women in mind. Now, an aside on buying cards, I hate buying cards and I think they are a scam by the 'man' to get us to spend money on something we don't need. Its like the card guys are saying, Dude, you got nothin'. Here take this gem I made with you in mind, give it to your special someone and your pain will be no more, but, dude that'll be $4.50--remember to pay me. I actually like giving the opposite card to people. For instance, it's your 40th birthday, how about a St. Patty's Day card? Just got married? How about a gag birthday card with George W. in drag? The anticipation is greater when people know they are getting a card I picked out. ...
Beyoncé's Kid's Clothes
2008-05-09 13:03:00 If you haven't seen any articles already regarding the new fall line of kid's clothes from Beyoncé don't worry because you will be overly informed after my article. Apparently Beyoncé, of singing and acting fame (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beyonc%C3%A 9_Knowles), has released a new line of children's clothes, The Deréon Girls Collection by House of Deréon, directed at giving little girls an opportunity to wear some of today's highest fashion designs (laughable) at a very young age. Can anyone say bad idea? Well, I don't think that we should make snap judgements about something unless we get more details. That's when I read the article by Joshua McIntire (http://www.examiner.com/x-276-Internet-B uzz-Examiner~y2008m5d9-Beyonce-Launches-L ine-of-Girls-Clothes --People-Scoff) over at my second home--The Examiner (http://www.examiner.com/x-300-Fatherhood -Examiner), and got learned. I found out what the new line of clothes is a...
Goofer and Pliglet
2008-05-08 08:53:00 Two days ago my two youngest girls and I were about to eat some lunch and I captured this hilarious scene. Peace.wvRPwDchquI
Tutorials and the Contest: Updates
2008-05-08 07:26:00 I have two items of business I would like to talk about today. First, is the contest (content/view/204/1/) . I would like to begin by saying that I am a little shocked that so far only 11 members have signed up to partake in the first annual Independence Day Contest (content/view/204/1/) at Joeprah.com. Considering the rewards, I will be giving bi-monthly updates in regards to the contest and each time I do so I will be giving all involved link love, plus you have a chance at winning cold, hard cash. If you are down for the contest I still need to know, just don't assume that you are in, you need to tell me. I think this is a no brainer, but that's just me.Second, updates. Now, if you stopped by yesterday you may have noticed I was retooling my menus a bit on my left sidebar. I now have a section for Joeprah's Best Work (content/blogcategory/33/122/) . This section is awesome. Seriously. I have to tweak it a bit more, but it is like 90% where I want it. Ano... More About: Tutorials , Updates
My New Career as a Waste Removal Technician - Part II
2008-05-07 20:59:00 Continued from this post... (content/view/203/1/) Now as all the drama played out behind the scenes, my wife had moved up into configuration management and had her eye on a software testing job as she consistently scored high on reviews. My career was in a different state as I worked for a friend who had inherited half of his father’s construction company. I had no benefits, I worked long hard hours for a guy who handled his money poorly and although I made more money than my wife there were times my paychecks would bounce or times when I was told not to cash a paycheck for a period of time. It was easy to see between the two of us who had the more promising career. Our focus shifted from celebratory to concerned as we started “crunching the numbers” to try and find out what we were going to do once the baby was born. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to see that pound for pound Jodi’s job offered more mobility, benefits and was a less abusive e... More About: Career , Part , Waste , Technician
The Playgroup Play Along Game for Dads
2008-05-06 09:03:00 After being in the playgroup circuit for over 7 years, I have started to discover that certain conversations and certain words are more an affront to me as a Chuck Norris fearing dude. I, like all guys, compete, so I have created a game that all men everywhere can partake in if they ever go to a playgroup. Now, for some unknown reason, ladies think that playgroups are both gossip time and also time to talk about their pregnancies so I have created a list of key words and their respective point totals in a game format so that you, an average guy, can find out just how much estrogen you have been exposed to. The point system below was devised based on how difficult certain words are to hear for a guy. Here is how the scoring system works: The Play group Play Along Game for Dads McDreamy (1 point) McSteamy (2 points) Latte (1 point) Starbucks Latte (2 points)George Clooney (1 point)Brad Pitt (2 points) Period or That Time of the Month (1 point) Crampy (2 points) Retaining...
Perspective: The Myanmar Cyclone
2008-05-05 22:37:00 Myanmar Cylcone Death Toll at 15,000 and Set to Rise (http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/myanmar_cyclo ne_dc) Over 10,000 confirmed dead in one town alone. (http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080506/ap_o n_re_as/myanmar_cyclone_85;_ylt=AkMQ7rTdJ ncr.pX.FCuiUNTQOrgF) More About: Myanmar , Perspective , Cyclone
Wow!
2008-05-05 10:50:00 So, for all of those registered members out there, I have come up with another bit of innovation in the form of The Community Blog. The Community Blog is one part forum, one part blog, and one part totally awesome. Why use The Community Blog? You as a registered user can now post content on Joeprah.com You can use the blog to give yourself link love from Joeprah.com (a site that has a Google Page Rank of 4) whenever you like. You can use the blog to talk about hot social topics in a friendly mature forum moderated by a super talented and handsome webmaster (ahem)You can use the blog to talk about something you just posted at your own siteYou can use the blog to write down a grocery list item before you forgetYou can use the blog for world peaceYou can use the blog to ask questions in the Joeprah communityYou can not use the blog and be totally fine, probably?, but remember it's out there and should be fun to interact withEnjoy this new innovation courtesy of team Joeprah. ...
Wow!
2008-05-05 10:50:00 So, for all of those registered members out there, I have come up with another bit of innovation in the form of The Community Blog. The Community Blog is one part forum, one part blog, and one part totally awesome. Why use The Community Blog? You as a registered user can now post content on Joeprah.com You can use the blog to give yourself link love from Joeprah.com (a site that has a Google Page Rank of 4) whenever you like. You can use the blog to talk about hot social topics in a friendly mature forum moderated by a super talented and handsome webmaster (ahem)You can use the blog to talk about something you just posted at your own siteYou can use the blog to write down a grocery list item before you forgetYou can use the blog for world peaceYou can use the blog to ask questions in the Joeprah communityYou can not use the blog and be totally fine, probably?, but remember it's out there and should be fun to interact withEnjoy this new innovation courtesy of team Joeprah. ...
Wow!
2008-05-05 10:50:00 So, for all of those registered members out there, I have come up with another bit of innovation in the form of The Community Blog. The Community Blog is one part forum, one part blog, and one part totally awesome. Why use The Community Blog? You as a registered user can now post content on Joeprah.com You can use the blog to give yourself link love from Joeprah.com (a site that has a Google Page Rank of 4) whenever you like. You can use the blog to talk about hot social topics in a friendly mature forum moderated by a super talented and handsome webmaster (ahem)You can use the blog to talk about something you just posted at your own siteYou can use the blog to write down a grocery list item before you forgetYou can use the blog for world peaceYou can use the blog to ask questions in the Joeprah communityYou can not use the blog and be totally fine, probably?, but remember it's out there and should be fun to interact withEnjoy this new innovation courtesy of team Joeprah. ...
Joeprah Newsletter: May '08 Edition
2008-05-04 23:00:00 Hello Joeprah Nation! This is the front of the house version of the Joeprah Newsletter . If you haven't signed up for the newsletter, you are late (by like a couple hours) receiving all this valuable information. First, I would like to say that the month of May has some exciting things in store for those loyal readers of, what I consider, the best site ever--Joeprah.com. I will be releasing the first ever series of articles that are only going to be available to Registered Users. In this series entitled Confessions of a Stay at Home Dad I will go back to the beginning and allow readers to find out the story behind Joeprah becoming a stay at home dad. This series has already been touted by critics (I am my own worst critic trust me) as groundbreaking, and better than reading the obituaries. So if you haven't registered you will soon find yourself on the outside looking in, I have forced your hand in a stroke of brilliance to register. Second, in ... More About: Edition
Word of the Day: Volume VII
2008-05-02 06:45:00 In this episode, Professor Toddler takes to the great outdoors. Enjoy this video compliments of team Joeprah. Happy Friday and here comes the weekend, enjoy it!3E0f6vitzzo Also, let me take this opportunity to thank everyone who came by and supported my article yesterday (content/view/199/1/) ! I am both humbled and very thankful to have such great bloggy friends. Aw shucks, you guys rule. Thanks again! More About: Word , Volume , Word of the Day
Oh, Well, Then Allow Me to Retort
More articles from this author:2008-04-30 22:30:00 Setting the Stage Remember that scene in Pulp Fiction where Brad talks in circles and Jules gets uber upset and shoots him? You know the Kahuna Burger scene? If you haven't seen Pulp Fiction I will set this up in terms so that you can understand. One party says something so ridiculous that it makes another second party hostile and super angry. Gun play ensues and the first party is quite dead while the second party is left unscathed from the fray. In this scenario I am Jules (Samuel L. Jackson) and Brad is Penelope Trunk (http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2008/04/30 /guest-post-what-lifes-really-like-for-a- stay-at-home-dad/) . Admittedly, I am not a Penelope Trunk (http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/) connoisseur, but I do get the gist of her blog. She gives tips/hacks to help deal with the corporate world. Ms. Trunks lends her insight and experience to suggest solutions to deal with workplace problems like office romance, how to get a job you may not be qualified for, or teachi... 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 |
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