Joeprah - Anecdotes of a Stay at Home DadJoeprah - Anecdotes of a Stay at Home DadWhy is a stay home dad's life funny? Stop by and find out. Its all about the kids! Articles
Stay at Home Dads: The Unintentional Feminists
2007-11-15 20:25:00 Serious Joeprah? Yep. I wrote some serious stuff for once. If you only read my articles for their humorous content than I would quickly click elsewhere. If you are afraid what guys think about feminist issues than I would also click elsewhere. Ok, I got that notice out of the way. Phew! Here we go: Being a stay-at-home-dad isn’t free from scrutiny but it also comes with praise. I think for every mom that has given me the cold shoulder there have been at least 3 more that applaud me for what I am doing. It really has nothing to do with my personal choice but rather a choice that was made by my wife and I years ago based on career potentials and level of benefits. One thing that I have noticed from staying home is that I have become acutely aware of how women are treated in society from my three daughters to my awesome wife. Things like clothes choices for toddler girls to Bratz dolls make me look at how society’s attention is focused on girls and how they look ... More About: Home , Stay , Feminist
News Worthy?
2007-11-12 08:31:00 Ok, wow, I somehow have the best luck ever. First, I married this awesome lady named my wife. Then, we had the three best daughters imaginable. Finally, Kathleen Deveny of News week noticed my humble bloggings and found one to worthy of mentioning in Newsweek. Ok, perhaps being in Newsweek isn't on the same level as my awesome family, but it underscores the point that I am living a life that is both blessed and super fortuitous. Kathy, we are buds so I call her Kathy, contacted me about my article on Throwing Away Your Children's Artwork because she found it to be so groundbreaking and a must have for her article on the same topic. I, of course, did what any self-respecting blogger does when they are contacted by a huge media outlet like Newsweek--I gave myself a super hard high-five and ran around the house like Kevin McCallister in Home Alone when he made his family disappear. All that self-congratulating can get old and after three long days of it I was getting re... More About: Worthy , Wort
News Worthy?
2007-11-12 08:31:00 Ok, wow, I somehow have the best luck ever. First, I married this awesome lady named my wife. Then, we had the three best daughters imaginable. Finally, Kathleen Deveny of News week noticed my humble bloggings and found one to worthy of mentioning in Newsweek. Ok, perhaps being in Newsweek isn't on the same level as my awesome family, but it underscores the point that I am living a life that is both blessed and super fortuitous. Kathy, we are buds so I call her Kathy, contacted me about my article on Throwing Away Your Children's Artwork because she found it to be so groundbreaking and a must have for her article on the same topic. I, of course, did what any self-respecting blogger does when they are contacted by a huge media outlet like Newsweek--I gave myself a super hard high-five and ran around the house like Kevin McCallister in Home Alone when he made his family disappear. All that self-congratulating can get old and after three long days of it I was getting re... More About: Worthy , Wort
My Two Year Old Is Awesome
2007-11-06 20:53:00 Well, the title of this post kinda sums it up. Our two year old daughter is just too much. She has more attitude and personality than a lot of ten year olds and seems to have endless amounts of energy. I keep trying to remember back with my other two girls and think if they were somewhat similar, very similar or not similar at all to our toddler. I think our oldest two have to fit in the somewhat to not at all category because our little toddler is easily our wildest and most outgoing of the bunch. She is also wicked smart. At an early age (before one) she could and would hold her writing implements like an adult should. It was instinctive. Her language and sense of humor have also been on light speed progression since she was just a button. Full belly laughs at two months and her ability to understand humor has always left me in awe. Besides all of this prowess she already possesses, she has now become a geography wiz. The next clip demonstrates her knowledge of a remote... More About: Awesome , Year , Some
My Two Year Old Is Awesome
2007-11-06 20:53:00 Well, the title of this post kinda sums it up. Our two year old daughter is just too much. She has more attitude and personality than a lot of ten year olds and seems to have endless amounts of energy. I keep trying to remember back with my other two girls and think if they were somewhat similar, very similar or not similar at all to our toddler. I think our oldest two have to fit in the somewhat to not at all category because our little toddler is easily our wildest and most outgoing of the bunch. She is also wicked smart. At an early age (before one) she could and would hold her writing implements like an adult should. It was instinctive. Her language and sense of humor have also been on light speed progression since she was just a button. Full belly laughs at two months and her ability to understand humor has always left me in awe. Besides all of this prowess she already possesses, she has now become a geography wiz. The next clip demonstrates her knowledge of a remote... More About: Awesome , Year , Some
You Down With OPK?
2007-11-05 08:46:00 You may remember the rap tune that had the refrain “you down with OPP…,” well OPK is a carefully constructed acronym based off that same high-brow formula. Where OPP had a more licentious connotation, OPK is not even licentious in how you connote it. Word. Everyone keeps asking me, “Joeprah, what is OPK?” I personally can’t stand the attention, but being a full-time genius means that sometimes you have to explain yourself. OPK – Other People’s Kids OPK is the term that can be used by all those people in the world that on occasion (or more than that) take on the added responsibility of watching other people’s kids. We all do it from time to time and I have made some observations regarding this phenomenon. Poopies – Poopies from OPK are infinitely more stinky than anything that comes from the hind quarters of your little one. This fact isn’t based on some kind of long winded algorithm or some proven hypo...
You Down With OPK?
2007-11-05 08:46:00 You may remember the rap tune that had the refrain “you down with OPP…,” well OPK is a carefully constructed acronym based off that same high-brow formula. Where OPP had a more licentious connotation, OPK is not even licentious in how you connote it. Word. Everyone keeps asking me, “Joeprah, what is OPK?” I personally can’t stand the attention, but being a full-time genius means that sometimes you have to explain yourself. OPK – Other People’s Kids OPK is the term that can be used by all those people in the world that on occasion (or more than that) take on the added responsibility of watching other people’s kids. We all do it from time to time and I have made some observations regarding this phenomenon. Poopies – Poopies from OPK are infinitely more stinky than anything that comes from the hind quarters of your little one. This fact isn’t based on some kind of long winded algorithm or some proven hypoth...
Joeprah Illin'
2007-11-04 17:53:00 I wanted to pass a note to all those loyal fans of Joeprah out there who have been worried to where I have been lately. I have been sidelined with a sinus cold that makes my head feel similar to the way a walnut feels in a vise (see ouch). I have been turning in early and having a little less time for some of my ventures above and beyond simply changing diapers and washing dishes. I hope my absence hasn't caused any undue stress as a result, however you should look forward to a recharged Joeprah in the very near future. Thanks for stopping by in the mean time and checking in for updates that weren't forthcoming over the last few days. Peace.
Joeprah Illin'
2007-11-04 17:53:00 I wanted to pass a note to all those loyal fans of Joeprah out there who have been worried to where I have been lately. I have been sidelined with a sinus cold that makes my head feel similar to the way a walnut feels in a vise (see ouch). I have been turning in early and having a little less time for some of my ventures above and beyond simply changing diapers and washing dishes. I hope my absence hasn't caused any undue stress as a result, however you should look forward to a recharged Joeprah in the very near future. Thanks for stopping by in the mean time and checking in for updates that weren't forthcoming over the last few days. Peace.
Happy Halloween!
2007-10-31 10:38:00 I have a frightening video to share with you for Halloween . This is a little something my family and I prepared for all the loyal viewers of Joeprah.com. I hope you like it and have a very Happy Halloween!! PS I hope you make it home in time Jared. ZkVw02drx8A More About: Allo
Happy Halloween!
2007-10-31 10:38:00 I have a frightening video to share with you for Halloween . This is a little something my family and I prepared for all the loyal viewers of Joeprah.com. I hope you like it and have a very Happy Halloween!! PS I hope you make it home in time Jared. ZkVw02drx8A More About: Allo
Joeprah's Weekend
2007-10-29 22:01:00 So, I had a great weekend. I could just stop their but I would like to clue people in on just how awesome it was so they can quantify my experience against their own. It wasn’t awesome because I won the lottery or because I met some really famous dude or something, it was awesome because I chilled…a lot. Friday night: My wife and I had friends over for poker and we drank and enjoyed ourselves and between my wife and I we won 3 of the 4 little tourneys we had (see my wife won 2). There were kids running around playing all night and our daughters had a blast (see this is how it is every Friday) and everyone went to bed really late. My best friends in the world are my neighbors. We all get along famously although we have such different personalities and come from such different backgrounds. Saturday: We picked up our new cat. We had a cat already, although he is very skittish and rarely is around people at all. In fact, he is so reclusive that when we have ... More About: Weekend
Joeprah's Weekend
2007-10-29 22:01:00 So, I had a great weekend. I could just stop their but I would like to clue people in on just how awesome it was so they can quantify my experience against their own. It wasn’t awesome because I won the lottery or because I met some really famous dude or something, it was awesome because I chilled…a lot. Friday night: My wife and I had friends over for poker and we drank and enjoyed ourselves and between my wife and I we won 3 of the 4 little tourneys we had (see my wife won 2). There were kids running around playing all night and our daughters had a blast (see this is how it is every Friday) and everyone went to bed really late. My best friends in the world are my neighbors. We all get along famously although we have such different personalities and come from such different backgrounds. Saturday: We picked up our new cat. We had a cat already, although he is very skittish and rarely is around people at all. In fact, he is so reclusive that when we have ... More About: Weekend
Wordless Wet Friday
2007-10-26 12:50:00 It is raining here. Hard. I have a video you all need to check out. If you haven't seen the videos from the Ready-Set-Bumbo series than this is a great place to start. Recognize. Secret Agent Mama (http://www.mishellelane.com/blog) has this video posted on her blog and like her blog this video is super awesome.I also wanted to give a shout out to my boy Dorky Dad (http://www.dorkydad.com/) who saw fit to throw down an award where it was needed...joeprah.com (http://www.joeprah.net) of course. He is random, funny as H-e-l-l and a dorky dad. What is not to like? If you haven't spent time getting to know him I recommend it. I think I am supposed to bestow the award onto others. I will have to think on it a bit and post on that later. *this is as close as I get to wordless* CPvpbjVJ1VM More About: Friday
Wordless Wet Friday
2007-10-26 12:50:00 It is raining here. Hard. I have a video you all need to check out. If you haven't seen the videos from the Ready-Set-Bumbo series than this is a great place to start. Recognize. Secret Agent Mama (http://www.mishellelane.com/blog) has this video posted on her blog and like her blog this video is super awesome.I also wanted to give a shout out to my boy Dorky Dad (http://www.dorkydad.com/) who saw fit to throw down an award where it was needed...joeprah.com (http://www.joeprah.net) of course. He is random, funny as H-e-l-l and a dorky dad. What is not to like? If you haven't spent time getting to know him I recommend it. I think I am supposed to bestow the award onto others. I will have to think on it a bit and post on that later. *this is as close as I get to wordless* CPvpbjVJ1VM More About: Friday
Kids Scare Me Volume I
2007-10-24 23:00:00 I am going to be busy doing endless piles of laudry today so I thought it maybe a good idea to show off an older post to my new readers since I had no readers in the past. Enjoy! I think I have always been a pretty cautious person, being raised on a steady diet of horror movies will do that. But I also have developed a healthy skepticism that allows me to cipher through the BS to know when to be on the look out for ghouls and other creatures (cause they’re out there) and when to put away the crucifix and holy water. Although monsters are scary, I feel we all can agree that real life can be even more frightening with taxes and all. I have three daughters, and although they are sweet as rock candy most of the time, there are some times when they can catch me off guard and scare the bajeebers out of me. Have you ever seen the movie “The Ring?” The entire premise relies upon the viewer of the movie being afraid of a little girl. Implausible, right? Not really. ... More About: Kids , Volume
8 Things…
2007-10-24 21:56:00 Being a commenter extraordinaire means I get tagged for memes on a frequent (3 times this year) basis. I sift through the ones that are too hard or that are too personal or the ones that aren’t personal enough to find the perfect meme. It is all about comfort and timing. So, when my Kiwi bud Jen tagged me I evaluated the meme under the strictest of criteria. A) Was I alive and B) Did I have hands. Off we go! Eight Things I am Passionate About 1. My Wife (she is so freaking hot)2. My Daughters (dumb, yes…but really awesome *note: they are not dumb at all*)3. My Friends (anyone that like me qualifies)4. Being A Father 5. Being A Husband6. Being A Friend7. Business Time with my Wife8. Finishing this meme Eight Things I Want To Do Before I Die 1. Watch My Daughters Become Women 2. Walk My Daughters Down the Aisle 3. Spend Quality Time Post Kids with my Wife (She is quite pretty) 4. Get a Decent Computer 5. Travel Around the World 6. Spend A l...
8 ThingsÂ…
2007-10-24 21:56:00 Being a commenter extraordinaire means I get tagged for memes on a frequent (3 times this year) basis. I sift through the ones that are too hard or that are too personal or the ones that aren’t personal enough to find the perfect meme. It is all about comfort and timing. So, when my Kiwi bud Jen tagged me I evaluated the meme under the strictest of criteria. A) Was I alive and B) Did I have hands. Off we go! Eight Things I am Passionate About 1. My Wife (she is so freaking hot)2. My Daughters (dumb, yes…but really awesome *note: they are not dumb at all*)3. My Friends (anyone that like me qualifies)4. Being A Father 5. Being A Husband6. Being A Friend7. Business Time with my Wife8. Finishing this meme Eight Things I Want To Do Before I Die 1. Watch My Daughters Become Women 2. Walk My Daughters Down the Aisle 3. Spend Quality Time Post Kids with my Wife (She is quite pretty) 4. Get a Decent Computer 5. Travel Around the World 6. Spend A l...
SADM Round 1 Fight 1
2007-10-22 23:00:00 The following is an oldy but a goody. Tell me what you think. If not, why are you here? The Stuffed Animal Death Match (S.A.D.M.) is underway and there is a buzz in the air that is unrivaled in the world of sport fighting. All the toys have gathered to see the action. In this first round match we have the number 1 seed from the “Stuffed Menace” Cheer Bear. Cheer Bear has a reputation for underhanded tactics and using weapons in fights. I wouldn’t be surprised to see her pull out all the stops in this first round match to set the tone for the field. Her opponent is the much maligned and often dismissed Peter Cotton Tail. Peter is outmatched in height, weight, reach, strength and overall conditioning. Although these attributes heavily favor his adversary, Peter does have the edge in agility and speed. We really don’t think this will matter much, but lets just see how it turns out. qpApHEtpi5g Cheer Bear advances. I shall return tomorrow refreshed fr... More About: Fight , Round
SADM Round 1 Fight 1
2007-10-22 23:00:00 The following is an oldy but a goody. Tell me what you think. If not, why are you here? The Stuffed Animal Death Match (S.A.D.M.) is underway and there is a buzz in the air that is unrivaled in the world of sport fighting. All the toys have gathered to see the action. In this first round match we have the number 1 seed from the “Stuffed Menace” Cheer Bear. Cheer Bear has a reputation for underhanded tactics and using weapons in fights. I wouldn’t be surprised to see her pull out all the stops in this first round match to set the tone for the field. Her opponent is the much maligned and often dismissed Peter Cotton Tail. Peter is outmatched in height, weight, reach, strength and overall conditioning. Although these attributes heavily favor his adversary, Peter does have the edge in agility and speed. We really don’t think this will matter much, but lets just see how it turns out. qpApHEtpi5g Cheer Bear advances. I shall return tomorrow refreshed fr... More About: Fight , Round
My Kids are Idiots
2007-10-22 12:16:00 I mean that respectfully and with lots of love of course. All little kids have a level of smarts. There are those kids who are super smart (dumb), there are kids who are smart (really dumb), and finally there are kids who are just stupid (toddlers). Super smart kids know how to tie their shoes and read. If you can do both of those things you are super smart. Period. Then there are those kids, who can’t tie their shoes or read, they know their shapes and colors, probably their ABCs and they can use the potty. They are smart. Stupid kids are different all together. They might be super advanced in any one area, for instance they maybe able to say their ABCs or identify their shapes or colors. Possibly they can count to 10 or some nonsense like that, but they make bears in their pants. Do you think kids are dumb? ‘Cause they are. You want more proof? Well, here you go. I have compiled a list of some of the most ridiculous things my children say to me to illust... More About: Idiots , Kids
My Kids are Idiots
2007-10-22 12:16:00 I mean that respectfully and with lots of love of course. All little kids have a level of smarts. There are those kids who are super smart (dumb), there are kids who are smart (really dumb), and finally there are kids who are just stupid (toddlers). Super smart kids know how to tie their shoes and read. If you can do both of those things you are super smart. Period. Then there are those kids, who can’t tie their shoes or read, they know their shapes and colors, probably their ABCs and they can use the potty. They are smart. Stupid kids are different all together. They might be super advanced in any one area, for instance they maybe able to say their ABCs or identify their shapes or colors. Possibly they can count to 10 or some nonsense like that, but they make bears in their pants. Do you think kids are dumb? ‘Cause they are. You want more proof? Well, here you go. I have compiled a list of some of the most ridiculous things my children say to me to illust... More About: Idiots , Kids
Moms Piss Me Off...Again
2007-10-18 16:49:00 So, many of you may recognize by now that I am a stay-at-home-dad. You may not know that I have been a stay-at-home-dad either full or part-time for over 7 years. I have successfully parented 3 daughters without either mangling or poisoning them (so far) and I have even impressed upon them important ideals like the value of laughter and education. I have cut their hair, changed their diapers, given them bottles and shown them how to use the potty. By now, I think I have earned a little respect for my efforts but apparently I was wrong. You see, the problem remains that I do not wear a ribbon denoting each of my parenting accolades. Also, I don’t have breasts and I have a severe lack of estrogen so I seemingly must be a perpetual parenting novice in the eyes of every woman that happens across my path. So, I wasn’t too surprised (pissed isn’t the same thing) when a woman approached me in an all too familiar fashion while I was eating at Chick-Fil-A. To set... More About: Moms , Piss
Moms Piss Me Off...Again
2007-10-18 16:49:00 So, many of you may recognize by now that I am a stay-at-home-dad. You may not know that I have been a stay-at-home-dad either full or part-time for over 7 years. I have successfully parented 3 daughters without either mangling or poisoning them (so far) and I have even impressed upon them important ideals like the value of laughter and education. I have cut their hair, changed their diapers, given them bottles and shown them how to use the potty. By now, I think I have earned a little respect for my efforts but apparently I was wrong. You see, the problem remains that I do not wear a ribbon denoting each of my parenting accolades. Also, I don’t have breasts and I have a severe lack of estrogen so I seemingly must be a perpetual parenting novice in the eyes of every woman that happens across my path. So, I wasn’t too surprised (pissed isn’t the same thing) when a woman approached me in an all too familiar fashion while I was eating at Chick-Fil-A. To set... More About: Moms , Piss
Joeprah's Desktop
2007-10-16 13:07:00 Ok, I was tagged again. Among my group of online blogging comrades is a nice lass by the name of wornoutwomen and like any sensible person on Earth she enjoys my site. Like Joeprah, she is awesome and writes about her family and also about her faith. She always has something great to say about the ridiculous things I write which also makes her awesome. Anyways, she gave me an assignment to complete. The assignment was simple, show off a screeny of your desktop and explain its significance. Above is the screeny she asked…no demanded of me. Here is the relevance of my screeny in the grand scheme of life for Joeprah. First notice how many application are open at the bottom of the screen—4 for those who need help. What does that mean Joeprah? Well, for starters, it means I multitask and that I am probably ADHD. FYI, 4 applications open at the same time isn't that big of a deal, usually I have at least 8 and I am totally owning each one. Second, notice the... More About: Desktop
Joeprah's Desktop
2007-10-16 13:07:00 Ok, I was tagged again. Among my group of online blogging comrades is a nice lass by the name of wornoutwomen and like any sensible person on Earth she enjoys my site. Like Joeprah, she is awesome and writes about her family and also about her faith. She always has something great to say about the ridiculous things I write which also makes her awesome. Anyways, she gave me an assignment to complete. The assignment was simple, show off a screeny of your desktop and explain its significance. Above is the screeny she asked…no demanded of me. Here is the relevance of my screeny in the grand scheme of life for Joeprah. First notice how many application are open at the bottom of the screen—4 for those who need help. What does that mean Joeprah? Well, for starters, it means I multitask and that I am probably ADHD. FYI, 4 applications open at the same time isn't that big of a deal, usually I have at least 8 and I am totally owning each one. Second, notice the... More About: Desktop
Using Your Kids To Win Contests
2007-10-16 12:00:00 Kids are great for many reasons. I love how kids are so readily moldable. I can convince them to do just about anything by simply offering them a bounty of a few M Ms. I am from the Baltimore region and because of this I am a die-hard Ravens fan (that is a football team for all of you who don’t know). My daughters enjoy the ritual of getting ready for a football game, the food and the cheering, more than they actually enjoy the game. So, when I received an email about a video contest for the #1 Ravens Fan I knew I had to include my kids. Why use my kids? First, they are cuter than me. Second, cute sells. Third, because I said so. The top prize is a sweet digital video camcorder, which I would allow them to use for their own movie projects in the future, and an autographed jersey which I would proudly display as a trophy of my accomplishment. If we lose, no big deal because I have this awesome video to include in my archives. 83QpYaKRsIw What do you think? ... More About: Kids , Contests
Using Your Kids To Win Contests
2007-10-16 12:00:00 Kids are great for many reasons. I love how kids are so readily moldable. I can convince them to do just about anything by simply offering them a bounty of a few M Ms. I am from the Baltimore region and because of this I am a die-hard Ravens fan (that is a football team for all of you who don’t know). My daughters enjoy the ritual of getting ready for a football game, the food and the cheering, more than they actually enjoy the game. So, when I received an email about a video contest for the #1 Ravens Fan I knew I had to include my kids. Why use my kids? First, they are cuter than me. Second, cute sells. Third, because I said so. The top prize is a sweet digital video camcorder, which I would allow them to use for their own movie projects in the future, and an autographed jersey which I would proudly display as a trophy of my accomplishment. If we lose, no big deal because I have this awesome video to include in my archives. 83QpYaKRsIw What do you think? ... More About: Kids , Contests
How Toddlers Get Around
2007-10-14 22:56:00 Kids never cease to amaze me. I have been thinking about how kids get around a lot lately. I mean, I thought about it. As I watch my two year old everyday, I realize that she runs from place to place constantly. She climbs down her chair after eating breakfast and runs a full sprint into the family room to play or draw or whatever. Then, later, she will put down the crayon or toy or what-have-you and sprint a reckless-kid-almost-falling forward-sprint into the living room to harass our cat until he can’t take it anymore and runs off. Next thing I notice is her running (again) towards the family room. She is always, always running. Actually, she isn’t always running. There are times when she hops. Let’s say she drops a toy in the middle of the floor and it rests in the direct line to her next destination. What choice does a world class toddler sprinter have in this situation? Hop of course. I am convinced that she really only knows how to move in a cou... More About: Toddlers
How Toddlers Get Around
More articles from this author:2007-10-14 22:56:00 Kids never cease to amaze me. I have been thinking about how kids get around a lot lately. I mean, I thought about it. As I watch my two year old everyday, I realize that she runs from place to place constantly. She climbs down her chair after eating breakfast and runs a full sprint into the family room to play or draw or whatever. Then, later, she will put down the crayon or toy or what-have-you and sprint a reckless-kid-almost-falling forward-sprint into the living room to harass our cat until he can’t take it anymore and runs off. Next thing I notice is her running (again) towards the family room. She is always, always running. Actually, she isn’t always running. There are times when she hops. Let’s say she drops a toy in the middle of the floor and it rests in the direct line to her next destination. What choice does a world class toddler sprinter have in this situation? Hop of course. I am convinced that she really only knows how to move in a cou... More About: Toddlers 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 |
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