The Web Pen Blog The Web Pen Blog A humorous blog by an improv comedian who is trying to script things that are made up. Get yourself a sardonic pop-culture hug. 
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Aimee Mann: @#%&*! Smilers
2008-06-09 08:00:00 Aimee Mann @#%&*! Smilers SuperEgo Aimee Mann is like some pop music ninja. Her songs are groups of stealthy earworms that burrow their way into your head and no amount of medical science can remove them. On her latest, Aimee has gone the opposite direction of the semi-concept album Lost In Space and the full-on concept of The Forgotten Arm. @#%&*! Smilers is merely a collection of songs born of the love of making music. This attitude is what made I’m With Stupid and Bachelor No. 2 her best albums. The writing is loose and breezy and while the subject matter may be a little dark, the songs are easily some of her most accessible. Take one of Smilers highlights, “True Believer”. With its clockwork rhythm-section and its bitter-resolve lyrics, you can’t help but sing along to the chorus as she confesses, “I want you, but you’re a poltergeist.” There are not many songwriters who can make you hum along as they are breaking up with you.... More About: Aimee
No Roundup Today
2008-06-06 19:56:00 Monday morning I woke up with a fever of 100.4 and haven’t really shaken off the slight fever feeling since, so my reading of blogs has been sporadic at best. I could be a bitch and say none of you wrote anything worth my notice, but it’d be an assoholic lie. Instead, I will entertain/bore you with some random things that happened this week when I wasn’t lying on the couch soaked in my own man sweat. The big thing for me was the announcement that the Democratic Party has taken John Edwards and Barack Obama’s pledge of not taking donations from lobbyists to heart and made a sweeping change for the entire party. What that means — in theory — is that the only group that the Democratic Party has to now answer to is “We, The People”. This kind of integrity is reason I am a fan of both Edwards and Obama. You may have noticed the blog being streamlined. I had some complaints about loading time and decided to get rid of most of the clutter. No... More About: Roundup , Today
And Now My Shallow Political Side
2008-06-05 08:00:00 Daily Kos recently posted an entry about how candidates need to have professional-looking photographs on their campaign sites which aren’t just candid shots their grandmothers took at a family picnic. On this post, they showed several good examples of great shots including this one: My reaction? “Humina-humina-humina-humina. Who dat?!” Turns out (thanks to the photo file being labeled with his last name) it’s Scott Kleeb, Democratic nominee for Nebraska’s open Senate seat. And he’s not just some political knob either. He’s a rancher and a professor. I mean, can he be any more of a well-rounded Nebraskan political nominee? He’s blue and white-collar all wrapped into one. Plus he even uses the term “green collar” on his site when talking about his energy reform beliefs. He’s all about dropping phly catch phrases like a well-seasoned rapper. Check out his Flickr photo stream for more beauty… uh, shots of his hard ... More About: Political , Side
Roundup - Week of May 23
2008-05-30 19:44:00 The weekly collection of interesting reads from around the blogosphere. Want to display your pride in making the roundup? Click here. This weekend — not that there are big plans — culminates into a get together at 11:00 PM Sunday night when a few of my friends and fellow fanatics of “The Venture Bros.” are getting together to watch the premiere of the third season. SQUEAL! If you are a fan, definitely check out their T-Shirt Of The Week Club for limited-edition, soon-to-be-hotly-desired, designer tees. Not seen the show? Here’s one of my favorite scenes: File under truth is stranger: Here’s a frog with Wolverine-like qualities. Toons ‘N Tunes posted this Muppet video put to Peaches’ “F*ck The Pain Away”. It’s hilarious and NSFW. What better way to correct the behavior of a child than to post an embarrassing picture on the Internet. And finally like many, I was saddened by the news of Harvey Korman’s passing yes... More About: Roundup
Truism Theatre
2008-05-29 08:00:00 Monday at the video store, I was joking around with a customer about collecting, when I had the following epiphany: Obsession fuels capitalism Listening to: “Sentimental Lady” - Bob Welsh More About: Theatre
Catz
2008-05-28 20:00:00 Loathing LOL catz has turned into a national pastime just as much as loving them, but, like all things, it’s hard to hate them all. So when a friend sent me a collection them via email, I hissed in excitement that there were two that made me LOL. One was a Star Wars reference, the other a cartoon. Why? Because of the fantastic 1936 Merrie Melodies short “I Love To Singa” directed by the great Tex Avery. Yes, the caption is wrong, but it still made me laugha with a gigga and a snigga and a gaffe-a. It made me laugha. Here is the original short: Listening to: “Where The Colors Don’t Go” - Sam Phillips More About: Catz
And Then It Was Two Years
2008-05-28 08:00:00 Who would have believed that I would still have someone in my life after two years? Not me. Cameron, you have been an inspiration and a rock for me and I can’t think you enough for sticking around, especially since March. You know… coz of the ‘C’ word. You may have felt helpless at times, but knowing you are there willing to offer any assistance possible has meant more to me than you probably know. Love you! Listening to: “Stamp Your Feet” - Donna Summer More About: Years
OSR: Indiana Jones And The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull
2008-05-27 20:00:00 One Sentence Review: Indiana Jones And The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull Slow to start, but a fun homage to the 30’s serials and 50’s sci-fi fodder — or as friend, TrashCanDan, said, “The longest “Stay In School” PSA ever!” Rating: Matinee Rating System: Full-Price Ticket, Matinee, Wait For DVD, Late-Night Cable Fodder, Skip It Listening to: “Love’s Been A Little Bit Hard On Me” - Juice Newton More About: Indiana Jones
Esoteric Pontification
2008-05-27 08:00:00 Why is it that when the television is showing nothing but a black scene it still lights up a dark room? Listening to: “Cancer For The Cure” - Eels More About: Esoteric
Roundup - Week of May 16
2008-05-23 16:19:00 The weekly collection of interesting reads from around the blogosphere. Want to display your pride in making the roundup? Click here. First some serious stuff. The tornado that hit Windsor, Colorado yesterday may have completely destroyed the home of the sister of one of my best friends. The Red Cross is there helping the community and they are asking for help. If you would like to give a little, click here. I gave a little yesterday. Or as one of the Monkeys said, “Ahhh, I guess cancer makes you generous.” You have no idea. First up, the New York Times has a blog going with four different musicians, three of which I love. Here is the latest from Rosanne Cash about the development of a song she, Elvis Costello and Kris Kristofferson are writing. Who would think that a “Match Game” spoof would still be funny after 30 years? Big Daddy over at Bon Jour, Pee Wee posted it. Have a video camera and love The Weepies? You could win $10,000. Dazevilla posted this hila... More About: Roundup , Week
Aimee Mann?s New Single!
2008-05-22 16:10:00 For those of you that don’t know, Aimee Mann is the penultimate music artist in The Realm Of Howard and her new single was just released! On Tuesday. Why doesn’t anyone tells me these things? Anyway, the song is “Freeway” and I first heard it at her Christmas concert. It’s fantabulous and catchy as hell. Here she is performing it live: It’s from her upcoming album @#%&*! Smilers which is released on June 3rd. The physical version is going to be an amazing package that is more like a comic book than a CD case and the iTunes pre-release has three extra tracks. Yes, I ordered both. Howard is a Mann whore. (HA! HA! Entendre made double!) Listening to: “Freeway” - Aimee Mann More About: Single
Reason #152 Why I?m Gay: Dead Or Alive
2008-05-21 22:06:00 One would think that it was “You Spin Me Round (Like A Record)”. On, no. The video that I was mesmerized by was the second single “Love Come Back To Me”. Maybe it’s the Eyptian theme or the movie theater motif or Pete Burns lying on his stomach with his legs in the air. No clue. However, this was the video that made me think, “Hmmm, Pete Burns might be *gasp* GAY!”. Lover Come Back To Me Pete always claimed he was straight and was indeed married to the same woman for over 25 years, but in 2006 he and his boyfriend, Michael Simpson, announced their engagement. I’ve no idea what took so long, but if I had ever seen the video for “I’ll Save You All My Kisses” when it came out, I would have called you a liar for proclaiming Burns as heterosexual. This video was actually banned from MTV due to its overtly gay overtones. Noooo! Really? I never saw it because I was in the Navy and they didn’t send us things like this.... More About: Dead , Reason , Alive
OSR: Prince Caspian
2008-05-20 08:00:00 One Sentence Review: The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian Darker and better than The Lion…, but still missing that element of magic to make it more than just perfunctory. Rating: Wait For DVD Rating System: Full-Price Ticket, Matinee, Wait For DVD, Late-Night Cable Fodder, Skip It Listening to: “Pencil Thin Mustache” - Jimmy Buffett More About: Prince Caspian
The Weepies? Hideaway
2008-05-19 19:05:00 The Weepies Hideway Nettwerk At first listen, the new Weepies album causes a questioning sense of wonderment. Here is an album by a band whose story seems so candy-coated: two people who are fans of each other met, fall in love, form a band, release an incredible debut, have a child and go on the road touring with a measure of success. The road took its toll it seems as displayed by the first 13 tracks of their second album, Hideaway . It’s dark and unbalanced. Darker than you would expect, yet after a few listens the subtle nuisances of their infectious folk-pop begin to burrow themselves into your brain. The infection really begins to kick in by track three, the title track. “Hideaway” is a slice of pure, acoustic pop heaven with a killer chorus and beautifully emotional bridge. As you listen more closely other songs begin to pop out: “Wish I Could Forget”, “Antarctica”, “Not Dead Yet” and “Old Coyote” — all ...
Roundup - Week of May 9
2008-05-16 19:53:00 The weekly collection of interesting reads from around the blogosphere. Want to display your pride in making the roundup? Click here. Habits can be hard to get back into. I only marked four entries from the blogosphere this week, so here they are. I’ll try to do better next week, Ma. Disney is all about making money, right? Well, here is a cute pin you can give them money for. It’s Wall?E and his lovely lady sexbot! Kath posted a very inspirational and personal story about recovering from a broken neck she received as she was being born. Going to the Summer Olympics in China? Check out the buffet. And finally, Mr. Fab gives us a close-up look of his own self-pedicure. It’s delicious. Listening to: “On The Radio” - Donna Summer More About: Roundup , Week
Lessons In Colorado: Shape
2008-05-15 08:00:00 Can you guess what the image is to the left? Wrong! It’s not Colorado . It is: …the geoellipsoidal rectangle that stretches from 37°N to 41°N latitude and from 102°03′W to 109°03′W longitude… Geoellipsoidal? Geoellipsoidal? No where in my brain does this word register. Since I don’t understand it, I shall laugh at it. And I did. Quite hardily. This hilarious description of Colorado is within the Wikipedia listing for the state and you would be correct in presuming that “geoellipsoidal” is a word that doesn’t exist… until now. Really. I did an exhaustive look for it and when I got to the second Google page of sites quoting the Wikipedia article, I gave up. Oh, the word sounds fancy enough and at first thought sounds cool enough to actually work. At second thought, it doesn’t, but then as you take in the big picture, it does. Technically. But by then you’re so bored thinking so deeply you’d rather watch Whitn... More About: Shape , Lessons
Bald Monkeys
2008-05-13 23:38:00 This is a shot from the end of the show last night taken by Kath. Cancer was the secret word last night. No, really. Every time someone said cancer, the entire audience screamed, so you can imagine how much screaming there was last night. There were 75 people in attendance and by the end of the night a whopping $1,800 had been raised. I can’t thank everyone enough for the help and for bringing all the love that was in that room. The highlight of the night turned out to be the shaving of Monkey heads. I was completely blown away at how entertaining the audience found it. Scanning back from the stage to the audience, it was amazing to hear the laughs and see the smiles of the audience as the boy Monkeys including former Monkey, Mike, all sacrificed their hair in support. Shari (as pictured by HDW) didn’t shave her head, but she did dye it red in honor of the color of the wrist bands for blood cancers. She looked great, too! She could totally get a job at Hot Topic except ...
OSR: Speed Racer
2008-05-12 08:00:00 One Sentence Review: Speed Racer This is just fun, smile-inducing entertainment; i.e. it’s a Technicolor’ed orgasm for the entire family! Rating: IMAX Matinee! Rating System: Full-Price Ticket, Matinee, Wait For DVD, Late-Night Cable Fodder, Skip It Listening to: “Go Speed Racer Go” - Ali Dee & The Deekompressors
Roundup - Week of May 2
2008-05-09 16:48:00 The weekly collection of interesting reads from around the blogosphere. Want to display your pride in making the roundup? Click here. I know! When was the last time you saw this? It’s called trying to get back in the groove especially with this week being the worst I’ve experienced with the after effects of the chemo. Oy. However, that is depressing news, let’s bring some joy and snark to your lives. As much as I loved Iron Man, I think I like Bent Objects version better somehow. Speaking of movies, my must-see this year is WALL?E and to celebrate you can build your own robot within the same universe. MISTAH FAB IZ HAVIN LULZ KATS CONTEST WER U TAEK PICCHUR OV MISTAH FABULOUS HIM AN MAK LULZ FABBY PICCHUR OV IT. THAR IZ PRIZE EVEN! Huh, I guess it’s true that some people will say things that make them sound like they are only trying to desperately remain in the celebrity spotlight. I have owned at least four different versions and formats of Parallel Lines an... More About: Roundup , Week
My Own Private Matrix
2008-05-08 08:00:00 Remember the scene from the Matrix where Neo wakes up in the ‘real’ world only to find out that he’s being used as a battery for the Machines? You know this one: He’s all hairless and filled with ports? I’m realizing that I’m looking more and more like this as I lose my hair. And I even have a port! Soon I, too, will know Kung-Fu. Listening to: “Drawn To The Rhythm” - Sarah McLachlan More About: Private
Benefit For A Monkey
2008-05-06 08:00:00 Do you realize how weird it is to advertise a fundraiser for yourself? It’s damn weird. The Monkey ’s Uncle show on Monday, May 12th is now going to be a financial helper to pay some of my medical bills and be a showcase to see male Monkeys getting their heads shaved. First, I want to thank everyone who has offered support, comfort and especially laughs during this period. I’ve felt truly blessed at having such a strong virtually- and reality-based support group. The Monkeys I especially want to thank for their huge hearts at even offering to do this upcoming comedy benefit — like I had a choice actually. It’s been suggested strongly that I put a link for donations for those who want to and won’t be able to see the show although I’m hearing rumors that the show may be taped, so if you are so inclined… And for no reason at all, here is something for you. It’s the new Monkey Mix that we put together for the show. M... More About: Benefit
OSR: Iron Man
2008-05-05 08:00:00 One Sentence Review: Iron Man Marvel’s Tin Man gets a heart and one of my favorite flawed heroes gets the tender, loving care he deserves at the hands of Robert Downey, Jr. Rating: Full-Price Ticket (I’m adding a ratings system since some of the reviews are on the snarky side and are unable to be deciphered.) Rating System: Full-Price Ticket, Matinee, Wait For DVD, Skip It Listening to: “Everything Counts” - Depeche Mode
The First Summer Blockbuster Means Howard Is A Year Older
2008-05-02 16:39:00 “Iron Man. Iron Man. Does whatever an iron can. Steam and starch are his friends. Drinks a lot. Cash he spends. Look out! Here comes the Iron Man.” I totally just made that up. It’s the start of another summer movie season kicked off with a superhero movie and I couldn’t be happier. Especially since tomorrow I’ll be a 41-year-old queek going to see the latest Marvel movie with my other geek friends in their thirties and forties. You know what else tomorrow is? Free Comic Book Day! That’s right for my birthday, I’ve authorized a few participating comic book stores to give you a free comic from a short list of titles. No, really. Tell ‘em Howard sent you and make sure you take a picture of their blank and/or inquisitive face and send it to me. This post is also here so Kath doesn’t have to look at the hot, hunky guy in the post below. (The unicorns are for you, girl.) Anyway, enjoy Iron Man if you see it. So far the reviews are out... More About: Summer , Blockbuster , Year
How Do You Say Shallow
2008-04-30 21:18:00 Last Saturday two regulars came into the video store. This couple is very nice and can throw a good joke back. Both are attractive and are definitely gym bunny types. While they were looking at movies, Corduroy (my newest iPod) started to play the ballad “Na Laetha Geal M’Óige” from Enya’s Watermark album. One of the two started to complain about how Bally’s used to play the song through the overhead speakers while he was trying to work out. Trying, he said, being the operative term. His partner and I started to make a few jokes about it to lighten up his mood which weren’t working, so I finally just walked up to the end of the counter they were sitting and said, “You see, the song allows you time to mourn the deep, meaningful person you’re losing as you gain muscle mass.” *Cricket*Cricket* They took advantage of another customer coming up to leave without renting or saying a word. Perhaps a button had been pushed? I don’t ...
Put You Under Cardiac Arrest
2008-04-28 19:24:00 This weekend I rediscovered the Buggles. The band that made their big splash in the world with their first and only big hit “Video Killed The Radio Star”. We all know the story of how it was the first video to ever be aired on MTV and whatnot, but some things you may not know is that the band consisted of a founding member of Asia, Geoff Downes, and one of the biggest producers of all time, Trevor Horn. Horn went on to produce Seal, Pet Shop Boys, ABC, Frankie Goes To Hollywood, Cher, Tina Turner, Charlotte Church and was one of the founding members of Art Of Noise. The other bit of trivia I discovered this weekend was that between their two albums Horn and Downes joined Yes for one album, Drama. I finally got a chance to listen to Buggles second album, Adventures In Modern Recording, which was finished by Horn almost alone. Adventures is definitely a Buggles album, but you can certainly hear the Yes influences all over the place. Their first album, The Age Of Plastic, i... More About: Arrest
Soon The World Will Be My Bitch!
2008-04-25 20:08:00 I struck a blow for the fashion conscious yesterday in a preemptive strike against the mange look and can now debut my ‘evil’ look. Yesterday was H-day, the day exactly two weeks after my first chemo and the day that I was told my hair should, if it was going to, fall out. Well, since my hair tends to do everything quickly, it started to fall out on Wednesday. What surprised me was the fact that hair below my neck is going to. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised, but I wasn’t told about that at Chemo Training. I poured over the PowerPoint and the video conference again and confirmed that I was told that it would be only my head and face (Woo-hoo, I won’t have shave!) I went down to Namaste Salon where I’ve been getting my hair cut since it was called Rick’s Hats Off and had Rick shave me head. I just love this little salon. Rick went to town and 15 minutes later, the shape of my skull was revealed to many that hadn’t seen it before. Thank... More About: World , The World , Bitch
I Just Exploded
2008-04-24 20:48:00 No, with delight, silly. Regular readers will know my absolute love for the animation series “The Venture Bros.” that runs on Cartoon Network’s [adult swim]. From little things like a review to watching it with Cameron on date nights to dressing up like Hank Venture for Halloween, one can postulate that I’m a big fan of the show. Actually, here’s the proof of my fandom: I’m having a party for the premiere of the third season at my place at midnight June 2. Yes! People have said they are attending! Hmmph. For some lucky few fans that attended New York Comic-Con, the viewing of a teaser trailer must have been geekgasmic. I know watching it at work… alone… with the lights off had me reaching for the tissues. What? I was crying because I was so happy to see proof of Season Three. Quick Stop Entertainment did fans a great service by posting the trailer yesterday. Watch it even if you aren’t familiar with the show as they chose scenes ...
Bossy Did Denver
2008-04-22 08:00:00 Guess who slept in my house Friday night. Oh, yeah… it was Bossy . No, the blogger, not the dominatrix. Bossy has been doing a road trip to meet fans, bloggers and friends and has been on the road since March 25. No wonder she was a little tired when she showed up at my doorstep and immediately demanded that I serve her white wine. I kid. I pushed the glass of wine on her. We had a lovely conversion about her trip, our cancer-related experiences (her dad has a form), blogging, Denver bloggers, politics and, of course, music. We have frighteningly similar tastes in music which came to light when I published my entry in The Spicy Cauldron’s writing contest last year. Our political views are almost exactly the same as well. In fact, I’m convinced that she is my long lost fraternal twin. I say fraternal because I stand at 5′7″ and she’s all *BAM* towering over me at 7′10″ or something. We know who got the legs that go up to heaven in this f...
I Just Noticed
2008-04-21 17:34:00 …that with Pluto being demoted to non-planet status that Holst was right the whole time. Yeah, I’m slow. There was supposed to be a review of The Weepies new album here today (it comes out tomorrow), but it turns out I had a Monkey’s Show to get ready for. It’s tonight, by the way. Listening to: “I’m Gonna DJ” - R.E.M.
Does It Bother You?
More articles from this author:2008-04-18 23:26:00 …that ‘verb’ is a noun? Have a great weekend! Listening to: “Euroboy” - Pet Shop Boys 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 |
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