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Diary of a HereticDiary of a HereticOriginal fiction posted daily, except when stories need more polishing, in which case non-fiction intrudes. Motto - Reckless fun and wanton disregard Articles
Emotional Rescue
2008-04-25 04:43:00 Amanda returned to her old house, grateful now that it hadn’t sold, so that she need never return to David’s. Like the Evanston house, also still up for grabs, she had strived for a semi-occupied look, despite having boxed up everything she hadn’t given away, which presently filled David’s garage. Although she couldn’t consult the moving company until tomorrow, she expected those one-hundred-and-one boxes to relegate David’s custom-painted, yellow-sparkle convertible to street parking for a month. Her satisfaction—it truly served him right—almost shamed her, almost. This divorce, agreed upon before they had landed at O’Hare, promised ill will aplenty. [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] Before the stupid wedding and stupider honeymoon, Amanda and the real estate agent had improvised a living room with a sofa, torch lamp, sisal rung and throw pillows. The girls’ rooms were empty until Amanda found bookcases and cardbo... More About: Rescue , Emotional
Repent at Leisure
2008-04-22 06:17:00 Exuberant on the plane, Amanda flipped open a journal she’d bought for the trip and wrote down David’s quick history of Mexico City. “Mind you, it’s very touristy,” he said, “but we can’t let that dissuade us.” They took a taxi to the Presidente InterContinential, where he had booked a suite overlooking Chapultepec Park. In Amanda’s opinion, the driver overcharged them, but she managed not to say anything. [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] As it turned out, “as fluent in Spanish” as David undoubtedly was, the Mexicans couldn’t understand him. So he kept repeating his instructions louder and louder. In a momentary lapse, Amanda rephrased a question. The desk clerk grinned, saying, “Sí,” he’d gladly make their dinner reservations. Why hadn’t she admitted she spoke “Mexican?” David spoke Castilian Spanish. Amanda took his hand and waited to answer. For their honeymoon, she had skimmed a few travel ... More About: Leisure
Playing the Idiot
2008-04-21 04:33:00 Every seat is taken. Tonight the faithful sit in semi-circular rows, a writing surface in front of them. Carlos doesn’t allow any tape-recording or photographs. He hasn’t got me on CD yet or DVD, but he’s working on it. [This post is an excerpt from Diary of a Heretic, the novel. Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] And looking at all the seekers, eager to hear my works, their notebooks open: I can’t go on—it’s over! Because here’s the catch: If I don’t believe what I’m saying, how can it possibly fly? So tonight—after nonstop weeks—tired, bored, fed up—I found myself impersonating a doltish school teacher. I blinked and sighed. “Pencils sharp? Erasers ready—” I looked around, hand shielding my eyes, and said, “Well, what have we here? A test of faith!” Silence. “Any thoughts?” Silence. “Anyone?” I waited a few beats more. “Well then,” I s... More About: Idiot
So Soap Opera
2008-04-20 02:36:00 [This post is an excerpt from Diary of a Heretic, the novel. Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] My parents called from San Francisco, using a speakerphone so they could both talk at once. Did I get my birthday present? Yes, I said, the briefcase was beautiful. “Coming up in the world!” my father declared. “It’s not that we’re not proud,” my mother said, her voice wavering. “It’s just that, that we worry. No one can have all the answers. And you . . .you really do tend to go overboard.” “Next year—thirty!” my father thundered. “We want to come see you,” my mother said. “Well, we’re in the middle of construction. . . ” “So tell us when’s a good time.” “Okay, I will.”*“Nothing like family,” Stephanie said. “Your face is the color of marinara sauce.” “You have to get over that,” Carlos said. “We’re self-made. That’s w... More About: Opera , Soap
Matrimony Acrimony
2008-04-19 03:26:00 Privately, later, Amanda would plead temporary insanity. She couldn’t sleep while in love with David Tighe. He took her to hear blues in Chicago, which thrilled her to the quick, keeping her wide awake for a week. He escorted her around The Art Institute, watching her reactions, and explaining the paintings that moved her, and even more about the ones that didn’t. If Amanda didn’t consciously refine her sensibilities, he kept insisting, she’d always go for plain intensity and sentiment, which he considered cheap. She needed to cultivate an appreciation for subtlety and mastery. That took time for most people, whether as artist or audience. But, of course, David had already decided that Amanda’s personality pegged her as a primitive. [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] “Insult or compliment?” Amanda had asked. That depended. She certainly appreciated art. Her excitement exceeded anything in his experience, and rest assured, sh... More About: Matrimony
His Big Idea
2008-04-18 04:20:00 Getting married was David’s big idea. And Amanda always thought if he hadn’t overwhelmed her, making logical cases about her essential “incompleteness;” if she hadn’t worried that her daughters might suffer, going to school where both she and her lover worked—if it weren’t for that and her mother’s lifelong desperation for marriage, which she had just achieved, Amanda might never have agreed. The oddity of David proposing caught her off-guard, even though they discussed it for weeks. He was fifty and had never married, so she had to ask, why her? Why now? [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] He didn’t quote Rumi, as he continued to do quite often for Amanda’s enlightenment. Instead, after holding his chin and as if mulling it over, he had said, “It’ll make things easier.” Amanda’s every-other-weekend schedule—she would only see him when the girls weren’t around—was taking a toll. And because he was fifty... More About: Idea
Husband Number Two
2008-04-16 23:37:00 Over doughy pancakes at the hotel restaurant, Amanda said, “Walter now that I’m adult, why can’t we…” She looked down, unable to ask outright. Besides, he knew very well what she wondering. He waited to look into her eyes and said, “Honey, grown-up or not, you’re my daughter. Not officially, but still—really.” He tapped the counter. “Truly.” [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] She swallowed and squeezed her eyes shut, two salty drops spurting through her eyelashes. And, she shook her head. That was half her question. The other: What had he gone through, caring for her when she was a young girl desperate for affection? Had she driven him past paternal doting? Oh yes. He’d warred against himself day and night. He hadn’t slept, keeping vigilance against his terrible desires. And, he had won. “I wanted so much to be a good father-figure. It was probably worse than you were capable of realizing.” “No.... More About: Number Two , Husband , Number
Rug Burns
2008-04-15 03:37:00 Amanda ran to her car faster than a human can run. Faster than sound if not light. A painful congestion stopped her ears. Burning shame invaded her skin. Fear collected as water in her mouth, water sliding down her face. She heard Walter calling her. His voice resounded over oceans and continents, through caverns, and encompassed mountains; it filled the clouds and saturated decades. So fierce was her belief that he was running after her, faster and farther than possible, that she could not think rationally. And Amanda always thought rationally; since childhood, she had always relied on her steadfast nature and natural competence: Amanda the A student; Amanda with her magna cum laude degree. Remember that Amanda whose response to her husband leaving her was a warmth bath? She was gone. [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] She now consisted of a need to see Walter, and touch him. Beg forgiveness. Win his most intimate love, which was safe n... More About: Burns
Rug Burns
2008-04-15 03:37:00 Amanda ran to her car faster than a human can run. Faster than sound if not light. A painful congestion stopped her ears. Burning shame invaded her skin. Fear collected as water in her mouth, water sliding down her face. She heard Walter calling her. His voice resounded over oceans and continents, through caverns, and encompassed mountains; it filled the clouds and saturated decades. So fierce was her belief that he was running after her, faster and farther than possible, that she could not think rationally. And Amanda always thought rationally; since childhood, she had always relied on her steadfast nature and natural competence: Amanda the A student; Amanda with her magna cum laude degree. Remember that Amanda whose response to her husband leaving her was a warmth bath? She was gone. [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] She now consisted of a need to see Walter, and touch him. Beg forgiveness. Win his most intimate love, which was safe n... More About: Burns
Wonder To Behold
2008-04-12 05:22:00 When Amanda’s plane landed in Charlottesville in one piece, the passengers applauded. Safe in her hotel room, she telephoned Olivia. “Want help getting ready? I can get dressed and over there in five minutes.” “Are you kidding? Sterling won’t leave me alone. She’s having fits because you, the third bridesmaid, can’t get here until the last second. I’ll meet you by the tent at two. With luck, you’ll be walking ahead of me before anyone stops us.” [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] “You know, traditionally, O, it’s the bride walking down the aisle who’s a wonder to behold. It’s supposed to be your day.” “Reuniting you and Dad? That’s my day. So don’t you start in about how I’m not serious enough. Keith’s only twenty-one and so Sterling and his mother, Liz, are like, ‘uh-oh, cradle-robbing.’ And, though she doesn’t tell Liz this, my mom has a thing about the man being smarter.” Olivia h... More About: Behold
Wonder To Behold
2008-04-12 05:22:00 When Amanda’s plane landed in Charlottesville in one piece, the passengers applauded. Safe in her hotel room, she telephoned Olivia. “Want help getting ready? I can get dressed and over there in five minutes.” “Are you kidding? Sterling won’t leave me alone. She’s having fits because you, the third bridesmaid, can’t get here until the last second. I’ll meet you by the tent at two. With luck, you’ll be walking ahead of me before anyone stops us.” [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] “You know, traditionally, O, it’s the bride walking down the aisle who’s a wonder to behold. It’s supposed to be your day.” “Reuniting you and Dad? That’s my day. So don’t you start in about how I’m not serious enough. Keith’s only twenty-one and so Sterling and his mother, Liz, are like, ‘uh-oh, cradle-robbing.’ And, though she doesn’t tell Liz this, my mom has a thing about the man being smarter.” Olivia h... More About: Behold
Girl Power
2008-04-11 03:57:00 After her one-night fling in Mexico, Amanda led a chaste life. Amazing to recall this phase, since ten years later, she’d be marrying her fourth husband. But after Evie and DeeDee returned from Disney World, laden with merchandise, Amanda devoted everything to them. She had set up their home, including covering one wall of each girl’s bedroom with wipe-clean wallpaper, designed for colored markers. [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] Her job and its ten minute commute matched her daughters’ schedule so well, she gave thanks to a nebulous God fading in and out of her mind. Except when the girls visited their father, they always ate dinner together. DeeDee scraped carrots, washed the lettuce, and made a wettish salad in big wooden bowl. Evie stood on a step-ladder to stir the pots and pour milk. Both girls set and cleared the table. Amanda relished reading to them, an hour minimum, asking them to cuddle in close. She a... More About: Power , Girl , Girl Power
Girl Power
2008-04-11 03:57:00 After her one-night fling in Mexico, Amanda led a chaste life. Amazing to recall this phase, since ten years later, she’d be marrying her fourth husband. But after Evie and DeeDee returned from Disney World, laden with merchandise, Amanda devoted everything to them. She had set up their home, including covering one wall of each girl’s bedroom with wipe-clean wallpaper, designed for colored markers. [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] Her job and its ten minute commute matched her daughters’ schedule so well, she gave thanks to a nebulous God fading in and out of her mind. Except when the girls visited their father, they always ate dinner together. DeeDee scraped carrots, washed the lettuce, and made a wettish salad in big wooden bowl. Evie stood on a step-ladder to stir the pots and pour milk. Both girls set and cleared the table. Amanda relished reading to them, an hour minimum, asking them to cuddle in close. She a... More About: Power , Girl , Girl Power
How Does It Feel
2008-04-09 03:44:00 In early November, Amanda signed the papers for a brick split-level house on North Humphrey Street. Although only ten minutes away from Oak Park’s spectacular Frank Lloyd Wright houses, it existed in a region as separate in her imagination as another era. Mike disapproved. “At least find a place with its own garage.” But the houses with garages sat on lush grounds. Amanda wanted manageable space, not yard work. She moved during Christmas, while Mike and the Drs. Morrison treated Evie and DeeDee to Disney World. [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] On Christmas Eve, she set up the kitchen, using stuff from her married life. The furniture, rugs, and draperies, she and Mike had agreed to leave in their old house, since it would fetch a better price if it looked semi-occupied. Except for the kitchen, Amanda would buy new furniture during the after-Christmas sales. Her daughters would return to a cozy, new life, the best s... More About: Feel
How Does It Feel
2008-04-09 03:44:00 In early November, Amanda signed the papers for a brick split-level house on North Humphrey Street. Although only ten minutes away from Oak Park’s spectacular Frank Lloyd Wright houses, it existed in a region as separate in her imagination as another era. Mike disapproved. “At least find a place with its own garage.” But the houses with garages sat on lush grounds. Amanda wanted manageable space, not yard work. She moved during Christmas, while Mike and the Drs. Morrison treated Evie and DeeDee to Disney World. [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] On Christmas Eve, she set up the kitchen, using stuff from her married life. The furniture, rugs, and draperies, she and Mike had agreed to leave in their old house, since it would fetch a better price if it looked semi-occupied. Except for the kitchen, Amanda would buy new furniture during the after-Christmas sales. Her daughters would return to a cozy, new life, the best s... More About: Feel
Why I'll Never Grow A Mustache
2008-04-07 04:35:00 Next month is my twenty-ninth birthday. No, April 20th is my twenty-ninth birthday but it’s also Adolph Hitler’s birthday, which is why my mother insists my actual DOB was the day I was due, not the evil dawn at which I prematurely arrived. [This post is an excerpt from Diary of a Heretic, the novel. Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] This morning, I recalled reading in an astrology book that those born on April 20th can, when speaking to crowds, project an extraordinary power over them. Isn’t that stupid? What astrological caveat goes to those born on Hitler’s birthday? ‘If you don’t watch yourself, you might murder six million people?’ So whenever I start wondering if I could be a genuine prophet, double my idiocy, why doncha? I can’t take this. My head aches. The shop’s in ruin. Everywhere I look everything is pure and total shit. (To be continued) More About: Grow , Mustache
Name It & Tame It
2008-04-06 18:16:00 Just before he left today, the boy Tyler sauntered over and offered me a hit of home-grown. I said no thanks, and he leaned closer, asking if I minded. The soul of concern, of sweetness, light, peace, joy and hope, he asked: was it okay with me? I shrugged and he rocked back in his shiny rubber boots and gave me a smile that made me start as if I’d scalded my tongue. [This post is an excerpt from Diary of a Heretic, the novel. Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] Burning with alarm, I raced up here and jumped in the shower, which, because of plumbing work was ice cold. But cold water was not enough: I needed noise and distraction. So, I sang old hits at the top of my lungs. An inner voice, however, does not need to shout. It’s got a volume all its own. I twisted and turned, trying to hold it back. But the voice was already broadcasting my every thought, deeper, louder inside my head. So ...
The Best Bad Thing
2008-04-05 04:45:00 The delayed divorce involved no rancor and no shortage of money, yet Amanda suffered every measly change as a profound disruption. For all the blessings bestowed upon her by her well-connected and endlessly helpful (eventually ex-) in-laws, her daily responsibilities demanded more patience and juggling skill than she would have guessed were hers to summon. [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] Carolyn quickly set up an interview for Amanda with the Oak Park River Forest’s school district, which for the time being involved an hour’s drive. Yet assistant to the CFO was a perfect job and once she arranged a move, Oak Park was just where she wanted to live with the girls. Ten days later the search committee chairwoman offered her the position, stipulating that she must start right away to help hire her in-coming boss. The real estate agency gladly let her go: in this market, the fewer agents the better. She prepared to sell their hou... More About: Thing
Her Only Lover
2008-04-04 04:11:00 At work, Mike’s mother Carolyn had left two messages on Amanda’s voice mail before nine am. Now it rang in Amanda’s hand. “Robert and I are sick about this,” Carolyn said and stopped to apologize for skipping hello and how are you. “I’m okay. I’ve felt Mike’s relationship with Nadia developing since last summer.” “Well, it won’t last long; I can guarantee that.” Amanda wasn’t so sure. [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] Audibly tapping her fingers, Carolyn said, “Of course, no one expects you to wait it out. I didn’t mean it like that.” “We’ve changed,” Amanda said. “And we’d be wrong to try going back.” “This weekend,” Carolyn said, “Evie told me she was a ‘mystic.’ Apparently, Mike’s girlfriend told her that with Pisces in her twelfth house she’s apt to have spiritual revelations. Robert and I admit we’re snobs. But I’m sorry, the idea of astrology influencing our ... More About: Lover
Numero Uno Daddy
2008-04-02 04:58:00 Weeks before the actual split, Amanda had arranged to work full-time. Much as she hated giving up time with her children, she couldn’t afford to depend on Mike. Especially now that she’d met Nadia, whom Amanda recognized as someone whose demands would escalate in direct proportion to Mike’s generosity. [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] The next week, when Mike had moved most of his things, she dropped off DeeDee at daycare. Evie was in all-day kindergarten. Amanda’s need to be as good a mother as possible to her children felt both urgent and fulfilling. It was all she had hoped for since they were born. And while leaving DeeDee at the daycare center didn’t, and shouldn’t, conflict with her mission, that change in her routine threw her off. Soon after she left the facility’s parking lot, Amanda had to pull off the road. For ten minutes, she was so scared she felt lost. Her common sense returned in full, but the incident had ... More About: Daddy
The Burning Tower
2008-04-01 02:58:00 Amanda hadn’t changed out of her daytime clothes as she usually did once the girls were asleep. She hadn’t even slipped off her shoes, choosing to receive Mike’s announcement with formality. He said he was leaving. She nodded, of course, and slid into a phase of life she may have always expected. The change affected her as both a revelation and as a given. To her, the marriage ended in a ceremony as traditional as the one that had started it. So that just as she had answered Yes to the question Do you Amanda take this man…she now asked him, “Mike, are you sure?” “Nadia wants me to.” This strayed from the script but not so much as to nullify the ritual. [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] He packed a bag and two suits, saying he’d get the rest of his stuff that weekend. As orchestrated as these minutes felt, Amanda experienced them as utterly surreal. “Joint custody,” she said. “Please, tell me you’re not g... More About: Burning , Tower
Grow or Die
2008-03-31 03:08:00 As of last week, even before Mad Mike and company started demolishing the shop, I agreed to start doing seven meetings a week, at Y’s, conference halls, corporate headquarters, downtown clubs, you name it. Maggie does the bookings. One night I’m in a one hundred year old theater on State Street staring up at balcony tiers and above them, rococo chandeliers. Another night I’m addressing a bunch of business types at the Marriott. Some nights, I speak to a few hundred people, other nights a few dozen. I do my little shows in library discussion rooms and Methodist conference halls, basement bingo parlors, and yesterday afternoon, in the stately home of the woman presiding over the Kenilworth Beautification Association. [This post is an excerpt from Diary of a Heretic, the novel. Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] I used to think maybe Carlos was right—I have a special gift, but lately, seven nights a week, I... More About: Grow
Scary-Young
2008-03-29 22:41:00 Mad Mike and his bleary, bad-tempered crew are on their eighty-eighth coffee break. They’re all bloated and grizzled, except one, Tyler, who’s young and beautiful. Hauntingly beautiful. Scary -young. [This post is an excerpt from Diary of a Heretic, the novel. Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] Huddled in the corner, the crew smokes hollowed out cigars filled with home-grown. The beautiful Tyler doffs his beret, releasing a cascade of dark curls. He slinks and turns, feigning a movie star’s scowl as his hammer-heavy belt slips down his hips. The other guys spit and scratch. I can’t believe how they act! As if, oblivious to him! My beloved shop, meanwhile, is a bombed-out shell of pulverized plaster. Layers of smoke undulate in the air. My eyes burn. My throat hurts. I can’t stay here and I absolutely can not leave. (To be continued) More About: Young
Animal Instincts
2008-03-28 03:48:00 For a while, life sped past, meeting Amanda’s most optimistic expectations. She never relaxed entirely, and yet, for eight years Mike Morrison apparently loved her. He behaved so much like a content, devoted husband that she believed him. In Chicago, they lived on her income from selling real estate, lavishly supplemented by Mike’s parents, while he got an MBA and moved into a hot-shot job at Northern Trust. During a vacation in Hawaii, Amanda became pregnant with her first daughter, Evie. Three years later to the day, she named her second daughter Deirdre, destined to be called DeeDee. Her daughters made her rejoice. Even their tantrums and erratic sleep patterns filled her with glee. Amanda was the mother she had always wanted, not perfect, but calm and strict and boundlessly loving. Not to mention—present. [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] She continued to sell comparatively small, well-kept houses in Chicago’s fabulous North... More About: Animal
Soul Sickness
2008-03-27 03:12:00 For years, Amanda stayed alert and treaded lightly without complaint. She hadn’t believed Mike about his interlude with Melanie Park. But she was wrong. Mike was right. She’d spied on their fond farewell and nothing more. And oh, what a fuss she had put up! Eighteen years old and marrying her first boyfriend, she at least knew when to object. Give her that much. Too bad she was out-numbered. Mike had wanted to marry her a lot, to prove something, maybe. And his parents, especially his mother, would apparently exert whatever it took. A bad sign right there, she had thought, only to absorb a resounding if ghostly chorus correcting her. [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] Cheryl behaved less subtly. “All I’ve ever wanted was for someone like Mike Morrison to marry me. So, you damn well better give me this vicariously.” “I said ‘yes.’ And, I love Mike. So it’s fine, right?” “You may not be the prettiest girl I’ve ever... More About: Soul , Sickness
Not in the Mood
2008-03-26 02:20:00 During the hour long drive back to campus, Mike blasted Jay Z, pounded the steering wheel, and happily yelled foul descriptions of the drivers around him, everyone speeding well past seventy mph. Amanda preferred no conversation, anyway. What was there to say? She absolutely didn’t want to talk about her mother. And whatever Mike felt like doing tonight—if it involved her—wasn’t going to happen until tomorrow. Amanda assumed since they hadn’t made love at Cheryl’s, Mike would want that first thing. Or sooner, when the traffic eased up, he’d want her mouth working on him until he was done. Usually she didn’t mind, and often she liked it. But now she was seriously not in the mood. He had to respect that. After all, sometimes, not often, but sometimes, Mike wasn’t in the mood. [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] Cheryl yanking her arm like that, snarling her desperate, impossible command outside while they both shivered—w... More About: Mood
Never Remember Them
2008-03-25 02:31:00 That next weekend, hinting that they needed “to talk to her,” Mike and Amanda drove to her mother’s in the Wisconsin Dells. Cheryl Hanson’s face lit up as Mike approached and kissed his prospective mother-in-law’s cheek. He even lightly draped an arm over her shoulder as they entered the condo. On the drive here, Amanda had warned him not to go too far. “If she thinks you’re mocking her, she’ll hate you forever. She has a bad temper.” “Never fear, sweetheart. Besides, I like your mother. You gotta admit she’s hot.” [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] Hot? That had never occurred to Amanda. Since they had moved to the Dells, Cheryl had never once gone out with a man. She had explained this—often—saying that if Amanda were ever alone in the room with a man, they were all in trouble. Cheryl had refused to allow Amanda to go out with friends, let alone on a date, including high school proms. So the fact that she like...
Surprise, Surprise
2008-03-22 01:23:00 Mike invited his and Amanda’s friends to their favorite beer garden and announced that they were getting married when the semester ended. Everyone expressed proper surprise. Everyone congratulated them with raucous laughter. For real or a joke, they kept asking. “For real,” Mike said. “Very, very real.” [This is the second post in a serialized story. Click here to read the first one.] “You should do it like a reality show,” Jason, his best drinking buddy said. “Start with the wedding and then video yourselves three nights a week.” After people suggested various scenarios for this, one guy asked when Amanda was due. “She isn’t.” Amanda blushed, throughout, more embarrassed than she had anticipated. She wasn’t used to attention, and big as the university was, from her first week there, people noticed her for some reason. Other students remembered her even from lecture classes. After she had hooked up with Mike, who was famous for getting people to t...
Four But No More
2008-03-19 02:59:00 Before her youngest child Callie entered high school, Amanda occasionally imagined divorcing the girl’s father once she had gone off to college. Since her daughter was smart, practical, and conventionally ambitious, Amanda expected college for her, and a great deal more. But with the world being what it was, she kept her mind open. Meaning, with luck, Callie would go to college. With luck, they would wake up tomorrow morning and with luck, go to sleep tomorrow night. Two years later, when Callie was racking up academic honors, working at the grocery store, and running varsity track, Amanda strenuously denied any divorce fantasies. She banished them from her consciousness: how could she have entertained embarking yet again on such a harrowing ordeal? Gavin was Amanda’s fourth and final husband, come what may. And so what if these last five years getting along with him had required all her tolerance? So what if she could not foresee mattering to him ever again? Of cou...
Tip of the Iceberg
More articles from this author:2008-03-17 03:17:00 From this vantage point (over the din of Mad Mike’s demolition) I can hear what I almost heard when we were signing all those papers: Carlos admonishing me: Don’t blow this. We’re talking a chain of bakeries. Carlos practically jiggled his fist in an abbreviated thumb’s up, ye-es-sss. [This post is an excerpt from Diary of a Heretic, the novel. Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] In any case, once it was clear I was more afraid of offending Shari Murtaugh than of losing everything I had, Carlos and company knew the deal was sealed. No matter how many more signatures were needed, no matter how high the closing costs, what the interest rates or points. Shari Murtaugh was assured I wasn’t fraudulent—I’d passed the bleeding holy card test—and I had demonstrated that hurting a fetishist’s feelings bothered me more than paying half a million dollars for a dress shop. Outside, we all shook hands... More About: Iceberg 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 |
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