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Anthology of Spam PoetryAnthology of Spam PoetryA collection of poems created from the universe of spam from bards around the world. Articles
The End Is Near
2008-11-06 22:02:00 Hello spam poetry readers! For the past month or so I've been working with a music group called Right Speaker Heavy as their lyricist and vocalist. The band sounds great... but I sound like an old man (which makes sense). I have some friends translating and reading the spam poetry posted here in other languages for the band. My proudest moment so far is having one of the shorter poems on this site translated into Urdu!My goal is to have 120 spam poems posted... so far, I've got 12 more to go. Stay tuned!
Opening the vagina (Live life to the fullest)
2008-08-08 20:43:00 His intention? On generosity at pretend. I hereafter was likelihood at the augment in flammable latitudes it peso.A bail? As the interstate of acorn, he is downright the dinosaur. Or by rectify elasticity physiology, baritone or storage, his countless on fever. Is sensor? To this showroom no canvas as margarine as rugged that be countless. That or ballast rhyme knitting secretarial at realisation to pump, speech be bespoke.Fight for your self-perfection and quest or go fanatic, fantastic to temporal. Distinguished acquisition in lotto commodore accomplished rally liberty! Challenging clinical the vulnerable in no seventeen frontal as he to compliance my stewardship. Her captive was as clan announce saline. That be fiesta mischief cartography. Not counterfeit as defective in fear. No charger. No, no breakup. A primer to thaw nitric melt underlie it metropolis in displacement.It, by his farmer, my craven, I folk in delusion. My so thumbnail. Not the flirt. And it senseless describe q... More About: Life , Opening , Live , Vagina
Feel yourself fine and dandy!
2008-08-01 20:42:00 I sense an enemy approaching.I are sensing a danger!ZOMG! I?m going to hurlz! ; I?m in ur house ? waitn for victimz &nbs p; I?m in yer weddin dress, plottin yer divorce from jerkface.Dear God? I can has cheezburger? Whaddya mean ?Be the cheezburger???Halp! I not cheezburger!Friez with dat?Do not want.I can has cheezburger?Do not want! Thought I wanted, but no. &n bsp; For this? you die in your sleep.Can it be hugz timez now? I must go. My planet needs me.Look over there yonder!Iz bird? Iz plaen? Iz cheezburger!!!1! Hi. I fall off ur roof.I has a bunny!It?s beautiful!Is hesitating your offer.Has run out of happy.The voices are telling me to kill you.I can kill you with my thoughts. I prolly can?t has cheezburger.Snzzz? I sleeps now. & nbsp; ... More About: Fine , Feel
how would i get into it that morning
2008-05-30 20:41:00 Glamorous glitters on your wrist.I missed.And some of them are so esoteric.I could not believe my eyes.BricksGet laid over and over.Give her womb a good massage.Nothing is quite as satisfying.I felt like I owed it to you.There will be no more games in the bedroom.Virility paradise is here.All your days of being laughed at are over.Great cucumber is your wealth;Wet and desperate for you.Win all the time with this,The key to fame and fortune.Subject her to a punishing ride. - Pascal Menáce A liturgical scribe from 1521-1538 with the Church of England during papal authority and after the separation from Rome in 1534 during the reign of King Henry VIII, Pascal Menáce (March 31, 1499 ? March 25, 1561) rose to literary prominence in two different careers at separate points in his life. Initially, he belonged to the numerous polyhistorians of the 16th century and, being an erudite, he mastered Latin and Greek and was particularly fond of... More About: Morning
* BOOK SALE *
2008-05-01 14:01:00 Hello dear readers!I'm hosting a Month After National Poetry Month Sale . For the month of May, you can pick up the Anthology of Spam Poetry book for $5.00 (usa) or $10 (all other countries).At last count, there are only 100 copies left... so please order soon! More About: Book
the acne notice next january
2008-02-29 20:40:00 There small another know with five.Together play they large parts about food country it.Help hard parts after time write her try.Against or place did big only of why think knew.Hand no several last that give do almost they.To man was you.Tell also change point toward.Animals today earth these sentence go land.Set day on any.Once need head whole next best also kind.They with was before.After who different things since under back place. ;Feet better heard point left once their. ;Were land night let those place earth kind have. In near has know against change one. T hese give what same him may there after also.Days since find men thing days across while high who.Head let high hand.With back himself across.Then tell thought next get between me being.Back thought began feet. - Maritsa Vanderwesthuizen ... More About: Acne , January , Notice
fight frustration with this but customize your win
2008-02-12 20:39:00 Take what your water long.Before me picture number life study thing.Best hard will high.We land few them got land. Under animals play this than a.Let be too above take her.With five paper tell. Will father far life told second better.Into world light today large a word night.In do can sound back life again. ;- Marisela Marisela [Dear Mr. Hurley: Apologies that this information has taken much longer to compile than anticipated. Information on the poet Marisela Marisela (September 22, 1827 - ? 1878) has been scarce and scattered. What I have uncovered is that her full name (via a poorly archived facsimile copy of her birth certificate) was Marisela Rhys Marisela, although she never signed her full name, even on official documents. She was born at Cumorah Hill in Manchester, New York to parents of German and Spanish decent. Their names are illegible on the certificate due to a crease in the paper where the names were typed. She... More About: Fight , Frustration
hope you feel better soon tomorrow
2008-01-22 20:38:00 Look each took top above air soon things point.Form too today men this boys again never.Home in on today.That next show than something.So also went called me important light old.Got say back means around hear.Good mother most important called year saw.Thought miles a far would.Big different look been.Play all paper people with into far people take.Like sentence looked this.A below who means hard name.Several them men who better want sentence went things school.Being go very because do called give.Small should since all was last.Far with those did those after saw little.Also again can day.Never then if learn.Set had keep also large.Time feet several saw began.Off picture paper should.High can through give parts time these find. - Lilyan Tashman The Jewish-Armenian silent film actress Lilyan Tashman (October 23, 1899 ? March 21, 1934) is best known as one of the tragic icons of the silent film era; however she composed poetry as part... More About: Hope , Tomorrow , Feel , Tomo
Personalized Letters from Santa
2007-12-12 20:37:00 Revolutionary mortgage concept.Can you be hypnotized?Caution!! You will be approved!(No embarrassment)Prepare to be amazed!You've been granted access!Follow these instructions very carefully. Your cat Friends on the inside inks cash out romance your cat sample from facials. new apple lingerie Exclusive cards. aromatic green tea science Professional health wild girls cards feature pampered slots, the book! your cat professional. Golden egg development Your doctor reports inks chocolate normal sexual life North Po... More About: Santa , Letters
Agog Represent Hesitatingly (sonnet for VlAmGRRA & ClALhllS)
2007-12-06 20:36:00 His voice was mild when hestared at her.What is it?She was thankful whenthe servants came hurrying.Alice was the last to join, the several servants nodded.As she came to the difficultstep forward, Nicholaa nodded. Yes, abovewhat if you be the one to follow my husbands.The servants nodded.She didn?t turn to Royce but Nicholaa muttered to herself.She passed her old chamber and?gathering round the fires throwing into the flames the remains of sheds, chairs, tables, wheels, tubs, and Prince Andrew or Dolgorukov. Her presentiment at the time had not deceived her that that state of freedom and readiness for any Old Gabriel. She seated herself across the cyvasse table from her father, the fat Myrish priest who used to drink with Robert. ?It is the size of ones cock which determines success.?Yet the wildling girl liked to huddle near the hearth, as if the cold ashes still held was only saying that to encourage your brother to be more diligent. &n... More About: Resent
No Longer Enthralled (limerick)
2007-12-01 20:35:00 At last you've found a gal that's hotYou wanna plough her moistened twat.She looks so sizzling, she's so nice!But would your penile size suffice?Not sure she will yearn for more?You need a dic'k she would adore!But how to grow it long and thick?Your only hope is MegaDik!You'll get so wanted super-sizeAnd see wild craving in her eyes!Your rod will pound her box so deep,Tonight you'll hardly fall asleep!So try today this magic p'illAnd change your life at your own will! - Wilmer I. Camacho Our entry today was written by Wilmer I. Camacho (January 6, 1832 ? October 12, 1892) who was married for 15 years to the Hungarians with a less than average size cock. He had given away a scholarship to someone to write his biography establishing its reputation but also doing good things. His brother, Europe, wondered aloud from the back of his carriage how but even with all that praise, by the early 1890s One searches similarly in vain f...
Up Dates on Past Posts
2007-11-24 09:12:00 I?ve made editorial updates several posts on the site. All updates were either recommended by me or the authors. Some of the editorial updates are very obvious (such as the June 5, 2007 entry) while others are more about style and /or clarifications (such as the April 30, 2007 entry). As always, I wish you well and enjoy reading!~ Morton More About: Dates , Past , Posts
Strawberry-Blonde Food Stamp
2007-11-20 20:34:00 Revered maestro,inexorably clodhopper, why be an average guy any longer? Shamefaced he thrashas cesare into cauldron,and collard that cycloramaon dragnet mine recipient.Unroted, unrotted, unrotten. Can you tell me what's wrongand how we can fix it,Strawberry -blonde dissident?A burst of laughter startled mysterious pickup truck.Eurasian wheelbarrow,greatest mode to treatment yourself,Not those waterloo or this comb.The others had obviously heard. ; - Sir Gregory Williams Very little is known of Sir Gregory Williams? (November 17, 1747 ? February 29, 1820) life and personality. The few anecdotes which we have of him include rumors of the occasional tryst with Marie-Anne Pierette Paulze (despite being 11 years her senior) during her research visits to England along with writing elaborate plays involving philosophical and scientific dialogues as farce-operettas. He lived in France for several years, but fled during the summer of 1792 a... More About: Food , Stamp , Blonde
overcome the bees (haiku)
2007-10-27 20:33:00 Dear Instigator,Hi honey! Remember me?(Know this is private) ; Want to smile again? ; Return sunrise to your life? Join me in Beijing. Womanly demonYoung and inexperiencedImproves sperm flavor ; Make her worship you &n bsp; No negative side effects &nbs p; Happy holidays! , care see cough on wine or like it's leaf try bit it's discovery on love may floor and copper in train. ; - Furqan Takada The live fast, die faster lifestyle of feng shui master Furqan Takada (October 27, 1920 ? October 27, 1949) was equally tragic as it was intense. Born to a catholic mother in Geneva, Switzerland who had escaped the Belfast... More About: Haiku , Bees , Overcome
Some useful advices for you health
2007-10-11 20:32:00 As young manBe the stud you should be instantlyBe a secret shopperBe always readyBe careful of cheap imitationsBe confident and stand tallBe full of energy and fill your partner with itBe gaastra to earpBe headingBe satisfied for lifeBe the ?biggest? out of all your friendsBe the bestBe the man you can be todayBe the most confident man in townBeater more insaneThese positions will help you reach your peak. - Gertrude Laakkonen Among the poets of the circumpolar peoples, none is more revered than Gertrude Laakkonen (October 2, 1452 ? November 10, 1518). Raised in Sámi culture before the mass conversion by the Russian Monk Trifon, Laakkonen?s family made a comfortable living on the husbandry of rangifer tarandus fennicus. Her family?s expansive ranch (named Joulumuori) in Joulupukki, Finland provided the ideal location for Laakkonen to contemplate the eternal question of the sielulintu, "Onkos täällä kilttejä lapsia?" During a momen... More About: Health , Some , Heal
Invitation touted Heck of a time
2007-09-11 20:31:00 New maniacs power ; spree ; snacks!Mak e it Melt. Easy. Only here.You should check it.Make it flat.Turquoise.Do you know what is coming tomorrow, mitochondrial maestro? If a relaxing moment turns into the right moment, will you be ready?We need to talk about it,because she'll love yourcorrupted filewith my seasonwithout Sabbath from twenty cubits. In today's society the hegemonic belief surroundingMexicans can't be terrorists,why, in pale fire, do you call parody the "last resort of wit"? They were moving swiftly and purposefully, their torches swinging and probing around them.Hands were slowly raised in greeting.Gentle grain of sandmaking adjustmentsthat display the sovereign remedy things have baptism ourselves barter.Kinked Yiddish hot vacancy! &nb sp;Your sec... More About: Time , Invitation
The superficial emptiness with thousands of happy customers
2007-09-03 20:30:00 Good evening.Thank you, 4 girls from our site want to meet youbefore opening bellridiculously boy.The reason behind itMaybe fifteen thousand of them, tops.get better after that?I show you how far the rabbit hole goesA few inches can make a real differenceas noblesville itselfcan never tell the difference.misfit Antarctica GuruLocked up like John the Baptisttaking my ancient name wrestling?They should have let it all be.Read this pleaseKnow this is private:"I loc ked t'h*e d+o.o+r to t'h,e h all, turn'ed o.u-t the ir light-s, a_n+d w'e n't i.n_t_o my b,edr'oom, whe.re I s,a,t a.while list,enin*g to t'h*e'm w*hi*spering, movi_ng furni+tu-re, a_n*d settl*i-ng d+o'w-n_."See this revered anomaly?It's just before the last tree on the left side.Nor she did make any attempt to go out of doors that morning, but lay curled upuntil certain?inexorably wedding dresswon't forget last night.This is too crazy!I g,o+t t h+e h e+l-l o*u't f.a,s.t'.Et vous appelez cela exister. ... More About: Customers , Happy , The Super
Hey! Where?s the Spam Poetry?
2007-08-10 06:11:00 A rather ironic turn of events has occurred on my office computer. The spam filters on the company?s server were upgraded and had put a near halt to the spam messages. As a result, I was running out of source material at an alarming rate! However a power surge during a recent storm knocked out our server, thus? leaving us left wide open for all sorts of crazy messages from spam poets the world over.In a round about way... thank you mother nature. And thank you dear reader for your patience. More About: Poetry , Spam , Where
With the rude multitude till I return
2007-07-05 20:29:00 A little secret to make you private life more interesting! As fast as 30 minutes, they were married an hour late. As your friendly chestnut bed squeaked from their orgasmotron, she lied? unpaid, despondent? pressing herein then menlo. She smiled with pleasure nonchalantly. ?As it happens, it?s a very nice butt.?Their clothes were discarded as destitute mine cadmium fritter sheepskin gemma. He was too busy reacting to trichloroacetic and scurvy Girl Scout orange juice.?It?s my seduction, not yours.? He shook his head. Can it be I found the jackpot?! He found his first smile.Good day, gentlemanToday everything is not so as always. Today my eyes are full of tears and my soul is ill. Today I have understood how alone I am.Woman...There are so many qualities consist in this word! What the real woman has to be? I think she has to be loving, affectionate, tender, careful, sensible. The woman can't be the real woman without these qualities. I can tell that I am the woman, the real ... More About: Return , Rude , Turn
Wetback Daytime Showdown
2007-06-22 20:28:00 Daughter-in-law... more beautiful than anything in this world.It is fine. Don?t worry ; maybe the best result ; &nbs p; &nb sp; &n bsp; got busy, then got sleepy.I had to know more about Jose?s father.Then, I think, he would have learned differently. Could it be wrong? Tell me this wasn?t worth it.Enormously shabby waif ? too cute not to share ? accelerated burning of unwanted fat in relativity. Looking for change, she sat down next to him on the Highway near Gadshill? covering I of lisman.I don't get over here much, but I do peek in once in a while. ;- Sedlacek Ursula A noted cryptozoologist and avid collector of Hypolimnas Bolina, Mrs. Sedlacek Ursula (1811?1873) achieved notoriety f... More About: Daytime , K Day
Couch control Jews waiting for this
2007-06-05 20:27:00 It?s a look, I guess, as catastrophe of cell.i don't know how do you fuck but i do it right.maybe u want to learn me better?We are ready to give you a loan on Russian wife... the real stuffWarfare occursBasically, I can?t live without itWe need to talk about itStart fucking and never stopCan?t believe it?Is it true?Interested in it?Don?t waste your timeSee it, today or notIt works for 36 hoursIt really improves erection!Let me show youI wish I could have done it all myself.Fuck fuck fuck herNo more penis enlarge ripoffs!Prepare yourself for this: I am 79 years young. Congratulations, you?re lucky! I am 65 years old.Fine, I won?t tell them.Funny, isn?t it...Howard let her go and then moved on to the weigh in.I didn?t believe it the first time either.Hope they are all okay now.What are your plans for the 11'th of September? & nbsp; - Jeremiah Horrocks Today?s spam poem was written by Jeremiah Horrocks (1618 ? January 3, 1641) who sc... More About: Jews , Control , Couch , Ouch , Waiting
Their hands, and others with urinals, who ran to and fro upon thee.
2007-05-21 20:26:00 Ring, ring, ring it?s Freda again.So you wanted another message from Ms. Pearson?Hope she is the one.What are your plans on the 20th?You know about the meeting on the 3rd don?t you?I?d go there myself if I had the time free.I?m a relatively good dodger.What do you say about this?You heard about lunch on the 9th yeah?Do you know that your dick is going to explode.Just relax.She will definitely like it, yes.Here comes another message from Laverne. Ha-ha-ha man, why your prick is so small?Never thought that so small thing exists.(How could she tell a man something like that?)You heard about dinner on the 14th didn?t you?Do it all night, don?t be silly.Really? Yes, right here.Remember to tell me later. ;- Hilaire Belloc Hilaire Belloc was born in 1870 in a village a dozen miles from Paris and a few days before the start of the Franco-Prussian war. Because of the war, Belloc?s parents, aunts and uncles, grandparents, friends and neig... More About: Hands , Hers , Hand , With U
Not an other not-e
2007-05-21 19:34:00 Just returned from DC and will be leaving for LA this week. The good people at Vertice 1925 told me that they?ve mailed out all ordered copies of the books as well as promotional copies!Where?s the spam? I have three two spoems ready to post and will get at least one of them posted before I leave for LA (done! see above). I should also note that some of the authors have asked me to make minor changes to their posts... so three or four of the most recent entries will change a little.If you haven?t done so by now, PLEASE ORDER A BOOK!
Chic Alchemist Show (or debrief no catsup)
2007-04-30 20:25:00 Hey, they are back for that candidacy of myself in cognitive bagpipes with my season without Sabbath from twenty cubits on watershed at bungle. Can?t believe it? Let me show you...This is unbelievable! The more I think about gift cards, though, the more I really don't like them and continue to hope that I won't receive any this year for the holidays.Do you like your family conference surprises preconceived with contempt... without worm activity detected? We need to talk about it. Because she?ll love your courtesy under criteria. Not that charisma canyon go Precambrian!Feeling cold outside? Congratulations, you?re lucky! Prepare yourself for this: I am 79 years young. Wow! That?s unbelievable! Why don?t you buy some medications to be healthy? Don?t forget to ask for discount. Good credit or not.Want to shave a few pounds? Russian wife is the best, find it here &... More About: Show , Mist , Alchemist , Chemist , Chem
Note Again
2007-04-27 01:54:00 Still here... been crazy with helping to mail out all of the copies of the spam poetry anthology books. New spam poems will be posted soon! More About: Note , Again
Immortal anti-spammers are lamers
2007-04-12 20:24:00 Immortal anti-spammers are lamersThe reason behind it... u will find out soon.Will you be ready?I would dream of the pillars &nbs p;of Aquebogue ; (or debrief no catsup) &nbs p;of between Edgeley (or discordant to prop) of Auberry be Alta (or Fenwick be Maskell) &nb sp;of the Hebrews from otherwise &n bsp; & nbsp; inconsisten t under-criteria.Clean faith, my paz.My reason behind it?I would dream of a Mahayana earthworm morning erection neglecting juniper pleasantries. Thick cunning receptors damage how vaccination dysfunction ventilated supermarket, transmitting sadness drugstore selling revolutionary lesbia... More About: Anti , Immortal , Spammer , Spammers , Lame
Seismic Gossip Bitching Angles
2007-04-05 20:23:00 Desired future failed following error through life to learn martyrdom.Read me!Receive a younger future angel shooting magical biracial double A rated sangaree with palindromic insomnia. Theretofore, less epochal mutiny of Glastonbury go hangman in rectilinear venereal disease crap,speeding heavyweight parish and additional rainfall hostage statement.South American quagmireincriminates undeliverable righteous labyrinthfor hot water container.Dismal, endless pain?Dim, and die tonight?This is not an experience that requires religious belief. Moments, pulled up together, assumedt his might be what you want. - Laurene Pearce The youngest daughter of a Huguenot couple who were among the first to be murdered in the streets o... More About: Gossip , Bitch , Bitching , Ossi , Angle
These Changing Crack Hatriots
2007-03-30 20:22:00 Provincial concertmaster was by inheritor healing erectile dysfunction excitement remaining youthful dumpy extremely alarmed? else equivocate or Aztec? Quitting curious sex can turn back the clock.Ashtray transfer in Jacksonburg (it can also add excitement) stumped beautiful almighty Jewish creation, which currently embraced a retard, because sawdust as so votive go or until Barceloneta was seismograph expression.Bootlegged marriage pleasantries ... More About: Changing , Crack , Rack , Trio , These
This Results from Field Chauvinism
2007-03-23 19:21:00 Discover cycling with chairwomen starred in such successful human growth hormone approval is waiting for professed still working on it said public concert Yankees of sensor below what it shimmy or carbonaceous wine have canceled public assistance bandanna rule or peephole category contrasting happily to whereby so sanguine ha-ha unchecked sapling technology hears bong onto hot Russian singles wear tight shorts powered by naughty innuendo or is distortion detesting archivist coach whom patent timing lights recklessly thankfully to my confiscate fairy tale levitate hatred Satan fires throw regularly. This reminds me a story that I heard when I was little.You see, chocolate pheromones must have prescription worldwide before u go telling Saturday night fever again onto geographically traffic accident placed pure South African Hoodia demand digital oops unbeatable blush no silk go my calculus opera pink much-branched cheerleader and imprecise treatment that you need which prospectus at H... More About: Results , Field , Result
Toboggan Patriarchal Balm
More articles from this author:2007-03-17 19:20:00 You won?t find better slapstick &n bsp; apocalypse &nb sp; &n bsp; & nbsp; anesthesia (be preferential or molt) ; through furnace option and apostle?s fatigue.Monolith secrecy or distortion lump into crazies water-resistant starvation above muddy preview.Euphemistically, Kuji was a real bitch, and openly despised all of our students.Textile wheeler Jill cartwheeled camembert to find liturgical purses, ; which be burlesque.Miscued marriage activity widely suspected. ; (whoops) It introduces rights which earlier proved impressive. Look... not to minimize crimes of the rest, but machinery featured was helpful as is reclamation language.Influential polling place oatmeal demonstrators characteristically ti... More About: Tria , Al B 1, 2, 3 |
