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Cool/exciting is the way to go.
2008-11-03 15:14:00
Sweetie and I have a difference of opinion about some things, like what are appropriate clothes to wear for Babies! We decided that we'd be getting our niece some outfits for Christmas. I immediately suggested outfits like "Tyrannosaurus Baby" or "Pterodact-baby." But Sweetie thought that maybe something a little less crazy would be better.We settled on this:That's just one of the many Designer Baby Clothes available from Afterdag Kids, an excellent online baby-clothes and baby-accessory shop that features everything from the traditional to the unusual, and is certain to have something for the baby you're shopping for -- whether you run more towards my tastes (cool/exciting) or Sweetie's tastes (boring/boring.)
More About: Cool

Shame On America Sunday: Presidental Election Quiz!
2008-10-31 20:49:00
Shame on America Sunday is appearing on Saturday because Sunday is Sweetie's Birthday and I promised her no 'puting on her birthday.Another change: In lieu of my usual rants about how wealthy America is and how people should be ashamed for letting rich people hoard money while poor people have to hire lawyers to make sure they can get medical care, I am this week presenting something that should either (a) keep you from being ashamed, or (b) make you ashamed.The thing I am presenting is theShame On America Sunday Presidential Candidates' Policies Quiz .You should take this quiz to make sure that you are informed enough to vote; if you're not informed you should not vote (and you should be ashamed for not being informed and not voting) -- but taking this quiz will make sure you are informed enough to vote.So here we go; I've left out third party candidates and focused on the two that have a chance to win, Barack Obama and John McCain. The answer to each question is either "Bar...
More About: Election , Shame

Talking to them.
2008-10-29 16:45:00
New Today! Part 2 of "Ghosts! There Are Ghosts!AfterDark: The Scariest Things, You CAN'T Imaginepublishes horror stories in serial forms. Click the link or page down past the ads to read the newest installment, or go to the table of contents by clicking the picture or title below:Ghosts! There Are Ghosts!Father Albert Wentley has ghosts in his church. A lot of ghosts. And he wants to help them but doesn't know how.Famished: A Temporary Anne story! With each day of her life, she moved closer to Hell. Now, Hell is moving closer to her.fer de Lance:Philip the obituary writer thought he retired, but his job continues... with unexpected results.Help Mateo and McHale! The Wonder Twins are medical miracles, but they can't do everything. Find out more about them, and how to help them with their medical bills, by clicking this link.Extraordinary:Extraordinarybybrianef pGet this custom bumperstickerat ZazzleDo you like stuff? Do you think things are The Best? Then you should be reading Th...
More About: Talking

Ghosts! There Are Ghosts! 2.
2008-10-29 16:40:00
?What is it you want?? he finally said. He?d never directly addressed any of the ghosts before. ?Tell me what you are doing here.? The ghosts? mouths moved, but he heard no words. When the first opened his mouth, Father Albert heard a whistling of wind, a cold, chill wind. He sat back, wondering where that had come from. The wind made him instantly think of the frozen, chill plains of Antarctica during the endless night it faced: inhospitable to the greatest degree a human could imagine. It so distracted him that he could not even follow the man?s lips to try to figure out what he was saying. The other man then tried to speak, and Father Albert turned to him but then turned away because when this man spoke what Father Albert heard was screams and wails of children, children in pain and hungry and sobbing. The sound stopped and he turned back. ?I?m sorry, I don?t understand.? They just stared at him, with their sad eyes. He said again, ?I?m sorry.? Th...
More About: Ghosts

Shame On America Sunday: Corporate Tunnel & Sports Lovers.
2008-10-26 16:53:00
This week, the health care crisis really hit home. On Friday night, my dad left a message for me asking me to call him as soon as I could. I wasn't able to return his call until Saturday afternoon, and before I could return his call, I had breakfast with the in-laws on Saturday morning.During that breakfast, my mother-in-law relayed to me that she had recently received a bill for her "treatments," a procedure she gets every month at the hospital. The bill was for $750, for two months worth of treatments; the bill was her 20% of the cost of the monthly treatments, which she says "keep her alive."After that breakfast, in the afternoon, when I called my dad back, I learned that he had just been diagnosed with, in his words, "corporate tunnel syndrome," a development that he believed stemmed from a wrist injury he suffered at work and the physical therapy he's been going through.Both my mother-in-law and my dad asked me, specifically, to look into their situations because I'm a la...
More About: America , Sports , Corporate , Sunday , Lovers

That's What I Said.
2008-10-21 23:11:00
New Today! The Beginning of A New Story:Ghosts! There Are Ghosts! Read part 1 here.AfterDark: The Scariest Things, You CAN'T Imaginepublishes horror stories in serial forms. Click the link or page down past the ads to read the newest installment, or go to the table of contents by clicking the picture or title below:Ghosts! There Are Ghosts!Father Albert Wentley has ghosts in his church. A lot of ghosts. And he wants to help them but doesn't know how.Famished: A Temporary Anne story! With each day of her life, she moved closer to Hell. Now, Hell is moving closer to her.fer de Lance:Philip the obituary writer thought he retired, but his job continues... with unexpected results.Help Mateo and McHale! The Wonder Twins are medical miracles, but they can't do everything. Find out more about them, and how to help them with their medical bills, by clicking this link.Extraordinary:Extraordinarybybrianef pGet this custom bumperstickerat ZazzleDo you like stuff? Do you think things are Th...

Ghosts! There Are Ghost!: 1.
2008-10-21 23:06:00
?That?s what I said,? Father Albert Wentley said into the phone. ?There are ghosts.? There was a pause while he listened to the voice on the other end of the line. He looked at the door to his office. He looked at the window, shades drawn. He looked at the desk. ?Don?t tell me it sounds crazy. First of all, I know it sounds crazy. Second of all, why does it sound crazy? It shouldn?t. We believe in spirits, after all. We believe in souls. We believe in an afterlife, and ghosts are part of what comes? after? life.? He deliberately slowed down his words for the last part, emphasizing what comes next. Another pause. He looked at the pen that he tapped in his hand. He looked at the door again. He didn?t turn his eyes forward at his desk. ?I know that it?s not traditional doctrine. But they are here.? Pause. Looking around. Then he spoke again: ?I won?t go to a doctor.? Pause. Looking around. Then he answered: ?Well, then, when you come to get me ...
More About: Ghost , Ghosts

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas-- a sterling silver Christmas t
2008-10-21 22:58:00
I think I've found the perfect gift for my mother-in-law, and maybe even for Sweetie and Oldest and Middle: the free silver jewelry club offered by Jewelry Club 925.Here's how it works: Sign up and get free jewelry.Simple, hey? It really is that easy: All you have to do is sign up, and then each month, Jewelry Club 925 will send you a FREE piece of sterling silver jewelry; you pay NOTHING for the really nice jewelry they send you (there is a small shipping and handling charge -- $5.95 per month) and you get to wear the jewelry and keep it.It's like Netflix only for Jewelry, if Netflix let you keep the stuff they sent you, and also if Netflix didn't charge you anything for the stuff you got to keep!The free sterling silver jewelry club has some great looking jewelry there, too -- earrings and pendants and bracelets and things. And what woman doesn't like getting jewelry? They ALL like it -- and you'll like the price, because (again) it's FREE.Joining the silver jewelry cl...
More About: Christmas , Silver , Sterling Silver

Ghosts! There Are Ghosts! Table of Contents
2008-10-20 00:54:00
Ghosts! There Are Ghosts! Father Albert Wentley has ghosts in his church. A lot of ghosts. And he wants to help them, but doesn't know how...Part 1: The first two.
More About: Ghosts , Contents , Table

I doubt that the pioneers who crossed the plains would think this is an apt
2008-10-20 00:49:00
When I moved myself to Madison, where I went to law school, my plan was this: drive there with my stuff in a U-Haul and find an apartment. Once in, begin finding a job.When my sister moved to California, she drove a rented truck across the country and lived with her friend for a few months until she found a place to live and a job.Those are not the GREATEST moving plans ever, but what could we do? Both of us moved back in the days when long distance moving was sort of the college-student equivalent of crossing the Great Plains : set out with your supplied and hope for the best.With Relocation.com, though, those days are over. Now, you can move to a new city without the stress of not knowing what's there when you get there, or how to move, or leaving stuff behind. Relocation.com helps you with your long-distance move by having, on one site, ways to find companies to help you move, find a house, an apartment, insurance, home improvement businesses, and more. Whatever you might n...
More About: Doubt

Shame On America Sunday: Where Will We Ever Get The Money Edition?
2008-10-19 17:40:00
This week, I got a little caught up on my magazine reading, and I was both concerned and given the idea for today's Shame On America Sunday when I first read, in Newsweek, that the next president would have a big mess on his hands (true enough) because he would not have the money to pay for ambitious social programs (a lie, and a stupid one, at that.)Then, I read in Entertainment Weekly, that there are currently six shows filming in one of the boroughs of New York City, and that it costs an average of $3 million dollars per episode to film in New York City. Those shows film there for various reasons, including (in the case of "Life on Mars,") that Brooklyn can look like Boston but has wider streets, and including for realism.Six shows. Most regular series have 22 episodes per year, so that means that the cost of filming those six television shows, alone, $396 million. It always looks more impressive with the zeroes, so here goes:$396,000,000 is what the United States can afford ...
More About: Money , Edition

Shame on America (Saturday Edition) Sunday: Be A Grown Up About Taxes, Woul
2008-10-11 16:21:00
I don't have very much time because I'm babysitting today and will be rooting on my brother in the Chicago Marathon on Sunday , so here's a special edition of Shame on America Sunday -- the Saturday Edition. I'll make it quick:Be a grown up about taxes, will you? That means just shut up and pay them. You don't have to like it. You don't have to pay more than your fair share. But, like getting up and going to work, like pretending to like green beans so the kids will eat them, like all the things adults do that they don't really want to do but if adults don't do them, who will, you have to pay taxes.Here's why: You like the stuff the government gives you. It's that simple. You don't gripe when the book store makes you pay for your books. You don't try to weasel out of paying the tab when the bartender serves the mojitos. Nobody ever complains about the cost of an ice cream cone.But everyone whines about taxes and tries to shift them off -- let the corporations pa...
More About: Taxes , Grown

Shame On America Sunday: Paul Newman Edition.
2008-10-05 17:32:00
Paul Newman was on the cover of virtually every magazine, this week-- because he died; people in America paid attention to Paul Newman this week because he was no longer alive.America didn't celebrate Paul Newman much in recent years, because Paul Newman was not doing anything America felt like celebrating. He wasn't flashing his private parts, he wasn't walking down the red carpet, he wasn't even acting that much.In his past few years, Paul Newman, who acted less and less as he grew older, spent more and more of his time, and more and more of his money, on charity work. Charity was so important to him that his daughter Melissa Newman said philanthropy, and not acting, should be what Newman was remembered for. It may well be what Newman ultimately is remembered for, but it's a guarantee that it's not what he was known for, because as good as he was at acting and as good as he was at philanthropy, Newman suffered from a notable lack of skill at self-promotion.Paul Newman's ...
More About: Sunday , Paul , Edition , Paul Newman

Finally, a little fun around here.
2008-10-05 14:34:00
I know this web page gets a little scary and dark now and then, so with the help of RD Laughs Main I'm going to lighten things up a bit for you. Over on the sidebar, you'll see the daily laugh from Reader's Digest -- that's "RD" to you young, hip kids -- courtesy of the widget they gave me. Look for "Reader's Digest Daily Laughs."There's a whole set ofReadersDigest.com Widgets; they're not just for the elite horror writers, but for everyone. You can go there and easily grab them and put them on your page. It took me only a second or two to do that one; click the 'grab it' button and then keep clicking the right button. 3, maybe 4 clicks and it's up and running.The widgets include Stand-up Videos, or Funny Cartoons, and there's even one for Facebook users that lets you add props to photos to make them funny.And, for you more serious people who DON'T always turn first to the "Laughter" section of Reader's Digest, there's a toolbar that lets you get instant updates o...
More About: Finally

I am afraid of what I will become
2008-10-02 15:45:00
New today:The conclusion of Temporary Anne: Famished. AfterDark: The Scariest Things, You CAN'T Imaginepublishes horror stories in serial forms. Click the link or page down past the ads to read the newest installment, or go to the table of contents by clicking the picture or title below:Famished: A Temporary Anne story! With each day of her life, she moved closer to Hell. Now, Hell is moving closer to her.fer de Lance:Philip the obituary writer thought he retired, but his job continues... with unexpected results.Rage: He was taken from her before he was born. Now, he's back and wants her to know what she missed.Help Mateo and McHale! The Wonder Twins are medical miracles, but they can't do everything. Find out more about them, and how to help them with their medical bills, by clicking this link.Extraordinary:Extraordinarybybrianef pGet this custom bumperstickerat ZazzleDo you like stuff? Do you think things are The Best? Then you should be reading The Best Of Everything! Why? B...

Temporary Anne: Famished: The conclusion.
2008-10-02 13:43:00
?Refuse my offer and I eat her,? I said quietly. ?And I will eat her soul, as well, and you shall never have that.?That is how I came here, you know.You know he refused the bargain. Mephistopheles does not accede to deals proferred by the damned.But I do not bluff.When the entire substance around me rippled again, then fused, became more solid than ever, when the mother began screaming and shrieking louder than ever and the air was turning to rock around us, hot rock that was excruciating and scorching but somehow not molten, hot enough to even affect me, who had so few nerves by that point, I acted.I pulled that baby?s head off and I began drinking its blood. It filled me, it warmed me on the inside. I tore at the stump and drank and chewed.I do not regret it.I do not regret it as I sit here in this alleyway. Staring at the fangs each of which is as big as my arm. Still dripping with fluid and I still do not know what it is.The minion is over me now, looming over me, taking u...
More About: Anne

Shame On America Sunday: Four Questions To Ask When Someone Asks For Help.
2008-09-28 17:55:00
NOTE: If you read all the way to the end, you will see my bailout plan that will not cost the taxpayers anything and will definitely work. Butyou have to sit through some rhetoric, first.Shame On America Sunday is about contrasts -- about the comparing of two things that exist, side by side in America; the fact that those two things could exist, side-by-side, is why America, the richest greatest proudest country in the history of the world, should be ashamed of itself.Today is no different. Well, today is a little different, because today, I'm starting with the little guy first. Usually, I begin where people's attention is always focused: The rich, the powerful, the famous, the spoiled-brat-kids/Tonight Show hosts who waste money, the selfish greedionaires.I'm going to reverse that today. He owns a house:Here's Michael "J.B." Schaffner of Nocona Texas. "J.B" is a trucker hauling for a small company. Back in May, "J.B." was one of the organizers of a convoy to Washington D...
More About: Questions

Famished (9)
2008-09-24 16:11:00
I moved in closer. I crept up towards the window, secure in the knowledge that the dog would not be raising any alarm, and secure in the knowledge that the mother, who I did not have any feel for, was not going to look out the window. Mothers do not look up from their babies, not for almost any reason, and they do not expect to see withered hags creeping through their backyards towards their cozy kitchen that smelt of milk and bread.I was only a few feet from the window, and the baby lifted its head off of the mother?s shoulder. It cast its head around. It was probably six months old, able to move but not lift itself or act.But I felt that it could sense me. I worried that it could and it would become alarmed.I was close enough to the window to hear the mother now, softly mumbling to her daughter, patting it, reassuring it in simple words and nonsense phrases as the baby tried to turn to see out the window and fussed. The window was opened; the window was barred solely by a fli...

Shame on America Sunday: $18 bucks a second.
2008-09-22 00:28:00
I hope that all of the people who decry me as a socialist are frantically writing to any elected officials they can, and saying For God's sake, I am opposed to socialism of the type that I decry when The Trouble With Roy espouses it, so please, Mr. Government Official, do not in any way interfere in the marketplace by, for example, bailing out Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac and AIG. I'm willing to let all my insurance premiums be for naught because I'm opposed to socialism!All the "you're nothing but a socialist" types, you're doing that, right? Or are you NOT, because you think government intervention in the marketplace is okay when you want them to do that? If so, then line up with the people who tell me It's their money and that I shouldn't tell people what to do with their money ... yes, yes, over under the sign that reads "Hypocrites."If you're going to disagree with me about what I write, in Shame On America Sunday or anything else, you should at least make sure you're ...
More About: Bucks

Down through the generations
2008-09-19 20:39:00
New today! Temporary Anne: Famished (8): Down Through The Generations .AfterDark: The Scariest Things, You CAN'T Imaginepublishes horror stories in serial forms. Click the link or page down past the ads to read the newest installment, or go to the table of contents by clicking the picture or title below:Famished: A Temporary Anne story! With each day of her life, she moved closer to Hell. Now, Hell is moving closer to her.fer de Lance:Philip the obituary writer thought he retired, but his job continues... with unexpected results.Rage: He was taken from her before he was born. Now, he's back and wants her to know what she missed.Help Mateo and McHale! The Wonder Twins are medical miracles, but they can't do everything. Find out more about them, and how to help them with their medical bills, by clicking this link.Extraordinary:Extraordinarybybrianef pGet this custom bumperstickerat ZazzleDo you like stuff? Do you think things are The Best? Then you should be reading The Best Of Ever...

Famished (8)
2008-09-19 20:36:00
Occasionally, over the years, I had caught a scent of something; not even a scent so much as it was a feeling or sense.A sense that there was someone near who I knew.Someone near who I was close to.Someone near who I was related to.My evil never knew any bounds; when I was alive, when I was whatever existence I am now, and when I am finally dead, when this existence finally wastes away or I am dragged bodily down to Hell by this minion threatening me now ? and it is threatening me, it stands in front of me in this alley and just waits, it does not attack, it does not drag me down, it does not call Mephistopheles. It just waits as I grow hungrier and hungrier and more and more weak and more and more fearful.Do you think that I should face my fate without fear?Me?I know fear. I did not just instill it in others. I knowfear; I have lived with fear gnawing at the base of my existence, pulling at my soul and my body, for long than many people exist. I have been afraid for so long tha...

Shame On America Sunday: Celebrity Cars.
2008-09-14 23:11:00
Each time I post one of these, each time I point out that somewhere in America , some rich person who is selfish and doesn't care about others is spending money frivolously, money that could be used to help others -- and should be used to help others, I get, out of the many comments and emails, at least five of each of these responses:First, someone (or someones) will say But they do a lot for charity.Then, someone (or someones) will say It's their money to do what they want with.Let me address those both briefly, taking the second one first:What do you mean, it's their money to do what they want with? What do you mean by that? do you mean that whatever they choose to do, it's okay? If it's their money, it's okay no matter what they do?Here's how to point out the flaws in an argument like that : take it to extremes; by doing that, the flaws in an argument will be exposed. So let's do that with it's their money to do what they want with. Let's expose how dumb that argume...
More About: Cars , Celebrity , Sunday , Shame

Famished (7)
2008-09-12 17:16:00
It went on like that for I don't know how long. I traveled, ever more slowly, and found people, people who reeked of good and people who were probably bound for Heaven, before they met me... and people who I then leapt upon, or grasped, or simply touched, and they were transported, with me, to Hell.I watched as a little girl, barely six years old, jumped rope outside her house early one morning while her mother gardened in the backyard. I walked up to her, boldly up the path, the bones of my heels making grinding noises on the concrete of the walk she jumped on. I stepped through her hopscotch board and she looked up and saw me, and she screamed, but I was too quick, even in my weakness and hunger, and I grabbed her by her long, straight, honey-blonde hair and almost instantly we were in hell: I, holding her by her hair, she, still screaming and shrieking and starting to cry and holding her jump rope in her hands. She wailed louder as the heat and acid-feeling and torments of H...

Shame On America Sunday: Housing Edition
2008-08-30 22:51:00
As I said last week, I don't like to get too serious or too political on my blogs. But the people who are supposed to be serious and political and take on weighty issues are too busy debating... nothing. Fiddling while Rome burns. So until America lives up to its promise and takes care of everyone and makes sure that everyone enjoys basic human dignity and comfort, I am devoting every Sunday to Shame On America Sunday. I may have erred slightly in taking on Barack Obama in the first Shame On America Sunday, as people thought it was a political attack. It was not; it was an attack on a rich man who was using money to do rich man things while poor people suffered. My point about Same Ol' Obama is that he spent millions to have a fancy party for his supporters, while people like the Shaws have to pay for medical care for their kids out of their own pockets.I stand by that; if Same Ol' Obama really wanted to make a difference, he'd have invited Ryan and Angie Shaw onto that sta...
More About: Housing , Edition

Wake up: You are going to Hell.
2008-08-28 16:13:00
New! Temporary Anne: Famished (5): Wake up: You are Going To Hell AfterDark: The Scariest Things, You CAN'T Imaginepublishes horror stories in serial forms. Click the link or page down past the ads to read the newest installment, or go to the table of contents by clicking the picture or title below:Famished: A Temporary Anne story! With each day of her life, she moved closer to Hell. Now, Hell is moving closer to her.fer de Lance:Philip the obituary writer thought he retired, but his job continues... with unexpected results.Rage: He was taken from her before he was born. Now, he's back and wants her to know what she missed.Help Mateo and McHale! The Wonder Twins are medical miracles, but they can't do everything. Find out more about them, and how to help them with their medical bills, by clicking this link.Extraordinary:Extraordinarybybrianef pGet this custom bumperstickerat ZazzleDo you like stuff? Do you think things are The Best? Then you should be reading The Best Of Everythi...
More About: Wake up

Famished (5)
2008-08-28 15:48:00
Then I was alone.Mephistopheles was gone. The minions were gone.The garden, previously green at the end of summer and lush with leaves and grass and bushes and shrubs and trees, was bare and sparse. There was no grass. There were no leaves. The trees were stripped bare and dark. The flowers gone. It was not as if there had been a fire; it was if the ground could not support living things and yet someone had tried to plant things there.In my life, when I was a young girl, people looked at the moon and wondered what lived there. Later, as a woman, caught up in my own trespasses against others, I never gave it much thought, but learned men discussed the moon being airless and lifeless. The garden looked as though it was planted on the sort of moon these men had discussed, in the times when they would discuss things; those times were always before they met me.After they met me, they spent much of their time wishing they had not and bemoaning their fate. My evil knew no bounds. ...

A beautiful, terrible light.
2008-08-15 22:18:00
New! Temporary Anne: Famished (3)-- A beautiful, terrible light-- posted today! AfterDark: The Scariest Things, You CAN'T Imaginepublishes horror stories in serial forms. Click the link or page down past the ads to read the newest installment, or go to the table of contents by clicking the picture or title below:Famished: A Temporary Anne story! With each day of her life, she moved closer to Hell. Now, Hell is moving closer to her.fer de Lance:Philip the obituary writer thought he retired, but his job continues... with unexpected results.Rage: He was taken from her before he was born. Now, he's back and wants her to know what she missed.Help Mateo and McHale! The Wonder Twins are medical miracles, but they can't do everything. Find out more about them, and how to help them with their medical bills, by clicking this link.Extraordinary: Extraordinaryby brianefpGet this custom bumpersticker at ZazzleDo you like stuff? Do you think things are The Best? Then you should be reading Th...
More About: Beautiful , Light

Don't look at me! Ahhh! The light!
2008-08-15 22:09:00
If you're like me, you take very very good care of your skin -- washing it, exfoliating it, ... um... washfoliating it...Okay, fine; you busted me. I take horrible care of my skin, the result being that I could pass for one of the creatures I'm always writing about here. So while you can't follow my example, you can learn from my hideous torments, and take care of your own skin while there's still time. You can best do that by using the Skin Care Products available from iDerma. iDerma's products are advanced skin care products. They have moisturizers, sunscreens, anti-aging products, even cleansers and mineral makeup. iDerma makes the best products because it was founded by Dr. Gregory Nikolaidis; he comes from the Westlake Dermatology & Cosmetic Surgery in Austin, Texas, and developed iDerma's products so that the professional grade skin care materials HE has access to could be made available to people like you. All iDerma products are made with the finest ingredients ...
More About: Light

A wretched almost-skeleton
2008-08-07 22:57:00
Posted today: Part two of Temporary Anne 2: Famished!: Lying in the alley, Anne reflects on what led her to be a starving almost-skeleton, and her meeting with Mephistopheles. AfterDark: The Scariest Things, You CAN'T Imaginepublishes horror stories in serial forms. Click the link or page down past the ads to read the newest installment, or go to the table of contents by clicking the picture or title below:Famished: A Temporary Anne story! With each day of her life, she moved closer to Hell. Now, Hell is moving closer to her.fer de Lance:Philip the obituary writer thought he retired, but his job continues... with unexpected results.Rage: He was taken from her before he was born. Now, he's back and wants her to know what she missed.Help Mateo and McHale! The Wonder Twins are medical miracles, but they can't do everything. Find out more about them, and how to help them with their medical bills, by clicking this link.
More About: Skeleton

Famished (2)
2008-08-07 18:31:00
It has been many years since that missive I wrote, many years since I tried to tell you, all of you, what I am and why I am, many years since I tried to convince you either to be so evil that you would distract the minions from me, or so good that when the minions were near me, and I near you, that I could then take sustenance, and escape from you.The years have not been kind.I remember my skin, and I remember the last time I had skin of any sort, really. I used to at least have skin, drawn tight and patchy and there were holes in it here and there, skin like the canvas of an old sail on a ship, skin that barely served its purpose. But I had skin.Now, I am mostly bone and sinew. The few ragged flaps of skin that cling to me do so out of a spite, a malice, that is perhaps greater than my own, or that fuels my own. It should be no surprise to me that the parts of my own body, at last, exist to torment me the way I torment the world and the way the minions torment me. But there it is: ...