Slutty McWhore

RSS Feed Homepage

Articles: 1, 2, 3, 4

Can a prostitute be a feminist?
2008-01-20 22:17:00
In the comments section of my last post, Alcoholic Poet wrote:"I've always considered prostitution the epitome of feminism. Not that I'm saying you're a prostitute. But women making money at the expense of male weakness feels feminist to me. It's all about power. And the person getting paid has the power."Luna countered this statement with one of her own:"Can a sex worker be a feminist, that is avoid pulling down women's - as a group - advances so far ? I guess it all depends what you call a feminist and how you see women's future in relation to men's."I fucking hate Belle de Jour (the blog, the book and the woman herself) because, quite frankly, I don't think she's the real deal. Nonetheless, she does occasionally come out with the odd intelligent comment which hits the nail right on the head. Consider this one, for example: "Unless you have been a sex worker, or know one intimately, you have No. Fucking. Clue." This would be my response to the debate inadvertently opened ...
More About: Feminism , Prostitute , Prost , Rosti , Feminist

Links for 2008-01-16 [Digg]
2008-01-17 07:00:00
Chinga tu madre, cabrón! How would you feel if someone you barely knew found out every single detail of your life - all of your hang-ups, insecurities, your every sexual fantasy? This is what happened to me (a Scottish erotic masseuse) when an acquaintance found and read my anonymous blog. Blog at your peril!
More About: Links , Digg , 2008

Chinga tu madre, cabrón!
2008-01-16 18:46:00
I just got off the phone to The HispanicLawyer who is still reading this blog. I've asked him to stop and he says that he will seeing as it obviously upsets me so much. I don't care one whit about him reading all the entries I wrote before I met him. But now I feel incredibly inhibited about writing new stuff. I no longer feel able to express myself the way I want to, or say what's on my mind. This blog is the only creative outlet that I have at the moment, and I am extremely resentful that it's being ruined.I am willing to accept part of the blame. I should never have mentioned my blog if I didn't want him to go looking for it. I can't say for sure that I wouldn't go looking for somebody's blog if they made enough references to it. It's not true, though, that I want people to find it or that I need their acceptance, as Arekino suggested in a recent comment. Sure, I was interested in hearing what The HispanicLawyer thought of it once he had read it, but that was because I f...
More About: Erotic massage

Links for 2008-01-14 [Digg]
2008-01-15 07:00:00
Blogging anonymously? Then keep your big mouth shut! An erotic masseuse writes about blogging anonymously about her experiences as a sex worker, and what happened when a friend came across her blog.
More About: Links , Digg , 2008

I just can't keep my big fucking mouth shut.
2008-01-14 18:31:00
I've gone and done it again. Compromised my anonymity, that is. Yesterday I checked my blog stats and noticed that somebody with an IP address based in my town had been looking at my blog a LOT. There's actually already one other person from my town who visits every day (could be coincidence, but I am a bit suspicious) but this was somebody new. I immediately thought it was the HispanicLawyer and then when I checked further that somebody had found my blog by using the google search terms "Artist's Way Blog Scotland" I knew for sure it was him. I had talked to him about my "secret" blog and about working through The Artist 's Way book, so there was just nobody else that it could possibly be. I called him up and asked him, and he admitted it right away.To be honest, I wasn't really annoyed. In fact, my first reaction was to be rather amused that he had read all that stuff I'd written about him where I said that he was like an over-grown teenager. One of Robert Burns's most famou...
More About: Fucking , Mouth , Shut

Links for 2008-01-12 [Digg]
2008-01-13 07:00:00
Why do white Americans have a stick up their arse? A Scottish woman wonders why white Americans NEVER dance at parties.
More About: Links , Digg , 2008

Down the pub.
2008-01-12 18:30:00
Over the last couple of days I've noticed that I've been feeling a wee bit depressed for no apparent reason (well, other than the fact that I suffer from chronic low-level depression!). I notice that I often feel a bit down after I've had too much alcohol to drink, and on both Wednesday and Thursday nights I had half a bottle of wine while watching the telly. I'm normally OK with a couple of pints or a couple of glasses of wine, but any more than that and I wake up feeling decidedly sorry for myself. Half a bottle one night would probably be fine, but two nights in a row? Not good - apparently. And, if I get totally wasted, then my hangovers are so bad that I literally can't get out of bed for the whole day. However, I've hardly had any crazy episodes recently except for that one time time before Christmas when I decided to go dancing in a gay bar all by myself and ended up kissing that deaf Hispanic girl all night (it's amazing what you can communicate by using napkins and ...
More About: Alcoholics Anonymous

Why do white Americans have a stick up their arse?
2008-01-12 06:41:00
It's nearly midnight, and I should be going to bed because I have to get up at the crack of dawn to run 20 miles tomorrow. But instead I'm dancing around my living-room listening to Ellen Allien, an amazing DJ from Berlin (although I just looked at her website and she's got her own fashion line now. Bit dubious about that). I'm thinking what the FUCK am I doing in this bloody town? I want to dance frenetically, I want to lose myself in the music, I want to take drugs, I want to kiss a handsome stranger in the corner of the club, then stumble out to the taxi rank in the Glasgow rain to head to his place to fuck all night long.Glasgow may be dark, miserable, wet and depressing (all things I love, by the way) but despite that - or, perhaps, because of that - it's a city that knows how to party. It has the best, most intense drug-fuelled, hedonistic parties and the best club in the world - Sub Club on Jamaica Street. It's easy to get totally hooked on that lifestyle and that's wh...
More About: Scotland , White , New York City , Americans , Stick

I was born yesterday.
2008-01-10 21:41:00
Nothing escapes Adullamite's beady eye, eh? I can't take a sneaky day off from blogging without getting pulled up for it in the comment section. But that's OK - it's good to have somebody hold me accountable. I did intend to write last night but I made the mistake of running 8.5 miles earlier in the day and forgetting to take my natural supplements (5-HTP and GABA - both meant to be good for depression) until quite late at night. Washing them down with a glass (um, or two) of red wine was definitely not a good idea, as I quickly became comatose and only managed to drag myself out of bed today at midday, feeling incredibly groggy and almost sedated. Clearly, this stuff does not do well when mixed with alcohol. I still feel like shit actually. So much for "being on fire" two days ago; today I feel like somebody has stuck ma heid doon the toilet-bowl. Ach, weel.By the way, how unbelievably cute is that baby, eh? Altogether now: awwwwwwww. When I turned thirty last month, it occurre...
More About: Yesterday

Don't piss all over my strawberries, Jimbo!
2008-01-08 20:08:00
Jim Murdoch, over at The Truth About Lies left the following comment on my blog yesterday as regards my decision to write in here everyday:"As for the writing every day malarkey ? why? I don't. ... And, if your blogs are going to be as long as this you will end up with repetitive strain injury and that could be a real bugger in your line of work. You have the makings of three blogs here. Rein it in a bit, lass, and think about us poor sods to have to read all of this."Well, I do apologize for the verbosity, Jimbo , but I can't really do anything about that except limit myself to one hour's writing a day. But, as regards the increased quantity of my writing, don't you think you should be encouraging that?A weird thing has been happening to me ever since I started following the "program" outlined in "The Artist 's Way" - and I mean really following it, not just buying the book and reading it like I did last January and thinking "Aye, that sounds dead good", then doing fuck all. I...
More About: Strawberries , Piss

Links for 2008-01-07 [Digg]
2008-01-08 07:00:00
Why I fucking cannot stand Wholefoods. A Scottish erotic masseuse writes about having a meltdown in Wholefoods! Working Class Boy Done Good. A Scottish erotic masseuse writes about why working-class men are always more attractive than middle-class ones.
More About: Links , Digg , 2008

Working Class Boy Done Good.
2008-01-07 22:31:00
*** A handjob for the first (non-Scottish!) person who knows who this picture is of! The song's a clue! ***This "blogging every day" malarkey is turning into a bit of a chore. I am most definitely not in the mood for writing in here right now, and there are a million other things I could be doing but, nonetheless, it's a good discipline to blog as often as possible. I'm a bit pissed off, though: where did all you cunts disappear to? I start posting all the time, and the comments start drying up as fast as ma granny's fanny. Get yer finger oot yer arse and write something, fir fuck's sake (especially those readers in Australia who seem to be lurking all the time but who never say a bloody thing). Ach, what do I care if you lot all think I'm pish. I think the trick is to develop some faith in my own abilities regardless what anybody else thinks.A most curious thing happened to me yesterday. I had to take part in an 18-mile race and in the days leading up to it, I wondered how o...
More About: Blogging , Class , Good , Rory Stewart , Working

Easy Writer
2008-01-06 05:48:00
Last night I watched "Easy Rider" for the first time. I loved it but that wasn't really a surprise, as I have always had a particular affinity for road movies, stretching all the way back to when I was fourteen and saw "Thelma and Louise". For as long as I can remember, I have always wanted to just get up and take off, preferably all by myself. When I was a little girl, growing up on a farm, I would spend all my time reading and dreaming, staring out of the window. Sunday afternoons in winter were always my favourite because my mother would be in bed after working nightshift, and my dad would be outside working on the farm. It would get dark by around 4:00PM and I would sit inside alone, in the warmth and comfort of our living room, listening to the wind and rain batter against the windows. I would imagine myself sitting inside a flying boat, which would take me up, up, up into the sky and all over the world. It wasn't that I was trying to escape anything. No, when I was really yo...
More About: Writer

Links for 2008-01-04 [Digg]
2008-01-05 07:00:00
"The Artist's Way" by Julia Cameron A blogger writes about using Julia Cameron's "The Artist's Way" to get over an abusive relationship and overcome her writer's block.
More About: Links , Digg , 2008

The Artist's Way
2008-01-04 19:29:00
I don't know if any of you are familiar with "The Artist 's Way" by Julia Cameron. An ex-boyfriend of mine (the biggest, most emotionally draining, soul-destroying head-fuck I was ever involved with) mentioned it to me after we had split up in early 2003. At the end of that relationship I was a mere shell of my former self, as my ex boyfriend had always been completely emotionally unavailable and eroded my self-esteem slowly but surely. There were a few moments towards the end when he was physically abusive (he even got arrested at one point for hitting me), but really he was just the kind of guy who, by his passive aggressive silence, made sure I knew that he didn't give a shit about me, my needs, my desires, and my creativity. I keep on having dreams about this guy (even though I haven't seen him for years and he's now living in France with a new partner and a baby) so I will get around to writing a blog post about him one day soon, but there's no time now to go into the reas...
More About: Creativity

The Eighth Annual Weblog Awards
2008-01-04 09:03:00
If there's one thing I miss about living in Scotland, it's the humble, self-deprecating nature of the inhabitants.But, fuck that shite! I'm living in the USA now, and suddenly I feel the urge for self-promotion.The Eighth Annual Weblog Awards are coming up soon, and I think that you should all vote for me. Yes, I even mean YOU, "Woman-with-cellulite-getting-fucked" Google Search Man in Saudi Arabia. I realize you only stayed around for a few seconds today until you realized you hadn't found what you were looking for but, c'mon, a wee vote wouldnae hurt, would it?So, here's the plan. You nip over to the Weblog Awards Site and vote for me. There is no limit to the number of categories you can nominate me for but even in my most self-aggrandizing moments (and there are some interspersed between the bouts of self-loathing) I haven't got a hope in hell of winning "Weblog of the Year". Something like "best-kept secret weblog" seems more realistic. If you're going to vote for me, t...

Links for 2008-01-03 [Digg]
2008-01-04 07:00:00
GABA GABA HEY! The benefits of taking natural supplements (like GABA - Gamma-Aminobutyric Acid) for depression and anxiety.
More About: Links , Digg , 2008

GABA GABA HEY!
2008-01-03 03:57:00
Oh, yeah, nearly forgot: A Belated Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year...yadda yadda yadda.Moving on.....No, I haven't misspelled The Ramones ' catchphrase; rather I've just started taking GABA - or Gamma-Aminobutyric Acid for the science nerds among you. This is apparently a neurotransmitter that affects the central nervous system. Wait - don't they all affect the central nervous system? Oh, fuck it. I don't know. All I know is that if you're deficient in this particular chemical, then you're likely to experience an anxiety-based depression. At least this is what Gabriel Cousens says in "Depression-Free for Life: A Physician's All-Natural, 5-Step Plan". I'm pretty against taking traditional antidepressants, as all they ever seemed to do for me was make me feel numb and lose my libido. I've only been taking this GABA stuff for a few days, so it's hard to say if it's working, but I certainly seem to be feeling a lot more relaxed than normal. I've also been taking capsule...
More About: Scotland , Kevin Costner , St John , Scottish

Links for 2007-12-21 [Digg]
2007-12-22 07:00:00
Victory for the Common (Wo)man A blog post about Abu Hamza, socialism, graduate school, French Canadian lesbians, kissing deaf Hispanic girls and whether men with a hook instead of a hand would be good in bed.And, oh, it's written by me - a Scottish erotic masseuse.
More About: Links , Digg

A Victory for the Common (Wo)man
2007-12-21 04:58:00
God, the internet's a wee bit frightening sometimes. There I was enjoying a wee glass of red wine as I innocently tried to find a picture of a generic lawyer type to illustrate tonight's post (for reasons which will become clear in a minute). I typed "Old Bailey" into Google Image and up came a picture of Abu Hamza (at his Old Bailey trial) in all his Captain-hooked, one-eyed glory. Christ, it's enough to gie ye the dry boke. But I cannae help but wonder what it'd be like to be in bed with a guy with a hook for a hand. I bet Abu Hamza would be a way better shag than the flip-flop wearing American frat boys in this town. Flip-flops?! Fucking flip-flops?! I don't need to worry about condoms and birth control as long as I live here because all I need to do is take one look at the guys' flip-flop clad feet and I can practically feel my hymen grow back.This is a message which goes out to all American men who live in a hot climate: fucking stop wearing flip-flops and those disgustin...
More About: Victory , Common , Master

Please tell me you believe in me.
2007-12-11 08:12:00
I got a belated birthday card from my oldest friend today. We've known each other for more than sixteen years. She wrote some details about her own life inside the card and, as well as wishing me happy birthday, wrote: "You've many talents and a lot of determination. I'm sure that you're going to have a very eventful life".It was nice to hear such supportive words, but at the same time they made me feel like such a fraud. I've told all of my friends back home about being depressed and not doing well in my Master's program, but I don't think anybody really knows just how bad I feel. All they remember is the girl who always got straight A's in school and then graduated with a double first. They wouldn't be able to imagine the failure that I am now.Oh, I know that calling yourself a failure is a harsh thing to do. But no matter how much I try to reconfigure what has happened to me here that is the conclusion that I have come to. I just turned 30, and I have done nothing with ...

Links for 2007-12-03 [Digg]
2007-12-04 07:00:00
Um, I can't find your penis... An erotic masseuse writes about the perils of massaging clinically obese men.
More About: Links , Digg

Um, I can't find your penis...
2007-12-03 06:00:00
When I was sixteen, I used to work in Halfords (a bike shop) in the town near where I grew up. As far as boring, part-time jobs for teenagers go, it was alright because there were lots of other people my age working there, too, and we'd always have a laugh. The other kids were mainly guys, though, so I got my first taste of how men behave when they're around other men (well, when I say men, I really mean hormonally crazed, teenage Scottish boys - although, as far as I can tell, they stay that way when they grow up, too). Most of the time, there was just a lot of harmless, stupid sexual innuendo but I always got pissed off when the boys made fun of the supervisor's wife behind his back.To say she was a big girl would be putting it mildly. The boys would always smirk when she came in to pick up her husband from work (who, like a character in a cheesy cartoon, was skinny and shorter than her). Once they'd left, they'd make jokes about the pair of them fucking, saying that they mu...
More About: Find , Ricki Lake , Penis

Links for 2007-11-29 [Digg]
2007-11-30 07:00:00
Why are academics all a bunch of fucking twats?! Academia = the most evil institution on the planet, filled with narrow-minded, pompous, petty individuals who will make you lose the will to live.
More About: Links , Digg

Are you ready for war, bitch?!
2007-11-28 23:37:00
Aye, it's a sad day when you start to post pictures of Mel fucking Gibson and Braveheart on your blog, but I couldn't find another picture, which better expresses the way I am feeling right now - totally fucking pissed off and with a bloodthirsty desire for revenge!What has happened, I hear you ask, which has made this wee Scottish lassie so fucking raging?Well, you all know how I've been battling depression for some time now, right? And you also know how I've had writer's block as far as my Master 's thesis is concerned, yeah? Well, the powers that be at my university over here "graciously" decided to let me come back (after taking a year's leave of absence) to finish off my degree this semester. To be honest, I wasn't ready to come back, but I had no other option because you're only allowed to take two semesters off in total. I was optimistic that I'd get stuff finished but, deep down, I just knew that it was too much - I had to finish off two essays I should have finishe...
More About: Bitch , Ready

Links for 2007-11-19 [Digg]
2007-11-20 07:00:00
Where are you all, you Scottish cunts?! A Scottish blogger writes about Scottish identity, and wonders why she has hardly any Scottish readers.
More About: Links , Digg

Where are you all, you Scottish cunts?!
2007-11-19 21:31:00
As much as I love you all, my darling North American readers, I can't help but be a tad chagrined that I have barely any Scottish readers. Well, there is you, Mr "Anonymous" K in Edinburgh (why did you move there anyway? Aren't you from Caithness originally? At least that's what Wikipedia says. Why didn't you move to Glasgow instead?) but apart from that, and the odd other random Scottish person who pops up, I seem to be persona non grata in the Scottish blogosphere.Why is this? Don't people in Scotland read blogs? Or does what I write about just not appeal to the average Scottish reader? Or maybe I just don't comment on enough Scottish blogs.Sitting in a café right now, wishing that I hadn't called this blog "Slutty McWhore" as the title is clearly visible as I type this and I'm worried that the long-haired hippy behind me can see over my shoulder. Worse still, maybe the hippy is the one blog reader who actually lives in the town where I live. I've often wondered if this ...
More About: Cunts

Links for 2007-11-18 [Digg]
2007-11-19 07:00:00
"Friends with Benefits"? - A really fucking bad idea! Why fucking your "friends" why always be a nasty, emotional mess.
More About: Links , Digg

I'm fucked up but at least I know it.
2007-11-18 19:47:00
One of the good things about getting older (wait - the only good thing. Everything else is just sagging flesh and more cellulite) is that I know myself better now than I did in my younger days. When I look back at the relationships I've had, it seems that I often ended up getting involved with men out of neediness, fear and loneliness, and not because of a genuine desire to have a companion. Even when I've felt "passion" for a man (a rare occurrence) I can see that it wasn't actually real, but was instead caused by my projecting various qualities and attributes onto somebody, which didn't actually exist.Last night a most curious thing happened. I went out with The OMMP for dinner and then to see a show, and after an hour or so, I found myself wanting to kiss him. Before I go any further, I should add that he is most definitely not a stalker. Before we went out, he said that he would be bringing a friend of his along, but he showed up at my door minus the friend. Apparently he w...

Links for 2007-11-17 [Digg]
2007-11-18 07:00:00
How to make the girl you're dating think you're a weirdo stalker. Sitting at midnight outside the house of a woman you've been on a couple of dates with, and sending oblique text messages about how many lights she has on is NOT FUNNY! It will make her think you're a stalker!
More About: Links , Digg