The Urban RecluseThe Urban RecluseEnter the strange world of a 20-something South London gal. I try to escape the world, but I always get dragged back into its insanity... Articles
Festive Spirit
2007-12-28 20:57:00 Last Sunday I went to visit my grandma who lives in East London. As I left my home that afternoon I discovered the thick mist which had descended over the city and lasted all day. (People from other countries seem to think that London is always foggy, but it’s quite rare really, and mostly happens on the odd winter morning.) Anyway, I felt like I might have entered the Victorian London of the novel that I’m currently reading, The Meaning of Night by Michael Cox. On the train into central London I noticed that some (presumably) young vandal had written “BELIEVE SANTA EXISTS” plus something about BSE (mad cow disease) on a window opposite me. I felt compelled to take a pic of it with my camera-phone. What a lovely sentiment, spreading the joy of Christmas to children everywhere. It’s just a shame that the perpetrator felt the need to damage public property to convey the message… After visiting my grandma and making my journey homewards, I alighte... More About: Spirit
Space Nudity
2007-12-27 22:41:00 1968: The opening sequence of Barbarella – 1994: Put Yourself in My Place by Kylie Minogue – 2005: They by Jem – Which version do you prefer? Related PostsSeductive ShapesSpace InvaderKeep on keeping onAnother gay night outGingivitis More About: Nudity
Brunch of Champions
2007-12-27 13:56:00 The last slice of cake. My mum always makes me a mini cake without the raisins and sultanas when she bakes for the family. NASA should pay her to make it for the astronauts - it’s the perfect food. Made with eggs, butter, crushed almonds, brown sugar, etc., then laced with rum, sherry and brandy for extra vitality. Related PostsBareback: A book review More About: Brunch , Champions , Champ
Will Smith is NOT a Nazi
2007-12-26 19:46:00 During a recent interview promoting his new film, I am Legend, Will Smith expanded on a comment he had made about his belief that the human mind is inherently good, by saying: Even Hitler didn’t wake up going, ‘let me do the most evil thing I can do today.’ I think he woke up in the morning and using a twisted, backwards logic, he set out to do what he thought was ‘good.’ Anyone with a modicum of common sense would not think that he was condoning Hitler’s actions or beliefs in this statement, but merely attempting to explain how someone could choose to commit diabolically evil acts in the belief that they are doing good work. Perhaps Will could have chosen his words more carefully and/or spoken about dictators in general, but I think his intention and meaning was clear. As a result of that comment, there have been calls to boycott Smith’s films. He responded to those threats with the following statement: It speaks to the dangerous power of an ignorant person... More About: Nazi
What did you get?
2007-12-26 16:14:00 The only present I got yesterday was a purple purse with a selection of nail varnish and a box of chocs from my brother. I also got some money from my parents and my grandma. So what did you get? Let me know in the comments. Related PostsNo related posts
20,000
2007-12-26 03:16:00 Source My twenty-thousandth visitor was from Sao Paulo, Brazil, and visited at local time 10:28:35 pm on 25 December. He or she found my blog via a google image search for this pic of Lindt chocolate from a post about chocolate withdrawal… Cool, eh? Thanks to all of you for visiting. Related PostsNo related posts
Merry Christmas
2007-12-25 18:21:00 Happy Birthday to Action Hero Jesus. And Merry Christmas to the rest of you. [Show as slideshow] Related PostsMerry Xmas and all thatVive la France!Happy Birthday Mariah!State of Mind (warning: long post)Sunday Sauce #26 More About: Merry Christmas
Even when I’m wrong, I’m right
2007-12-25 03:23:00 Less than a week after I blogged about Lily Allen’s cleavage, the pop singer reveals that she’s pregnant, and that’s she’s going to have her own tv show. Plus she’s going to be a judge for the Orange prize for fiction. What next for Lily? Let’s just hope she stays off the booze while she’s pregnant. Related PostsFrom heart throb to door knobOff the railsKeep on keeping onThankful that it’s finally overJust another day More About: Wrong
My Xmas is
2007-12-25 00:17:00 Getting stuck in the supermarket on Xmas Eve after forgetting something essential - like cheese, or a last-minute present. (Though not this year.) Colluding with my brother to buy our mum a present. Buying myself more than anyone else. Hey, I deserve it. Going mental in the crowds when present-shopping. Note to self: go to Victoria again next year, it’s not as busy as Croydon or Oxford Street but has all the usual shops. Mum’s cake. The best in the world. She makes me my own mini cake, without the raisins. Housework. Random Santa sightings. (Saw two skinny Santas on their way to a footie match on Saturday.) Carol singers in Croydon. Charity workers with Santa hats. Turkey (but I prefer it on Boxing Day, when my mum fries the leftover meat.) We’ll also have brussel sprouts, stuffing, salad, potatoes, and rice & peas. Quality Street chocs. My faves are the coconut one and the one in the purple wrapper with the peanut and caramel filling. Family movies. My Fair ...
More Silly Tests
2007-12-24 03:07:00 Which Britney Spears Are you? Serious Britney You could loosen up a bit but your okay the way you are but smile every now and then! Celebrities-Fame Quizzes – Which Greek god/goddess are you? Poseidon You are Poseidon! Poseidon was the God of the Sea, Earthquakes, and Horses.He lost the battle of being patron deity of Athens to Athena, he struck his spear into the ground and made a spring of salt so the Athenians would worship him, but Athena planted an olive tree which the Athenians liked better.He was also the father of Theseus. Fantasy-Mythology Quizzes – which celebrity do you look like? (girls only-pics) Hilary Duff You resemble hilary duff!! you can be shy and stand offish but you are sweet at heart!! you are a very humble person and many resemblances are seen in both of you. Myspace Quizzes Related PostsHave you ever obliterated a village?Yeah baby!Idiot Savant? Moi?What Classic Movie Are You?personality ... More About: Silly , Tests
Sunday Sauce #26
2007-12-24 00:59:00 This week’s Sunday Sauce comes to you from Sexy Santa’s Secret Grotto. Here are some saucy Christmas pics for your enjoyment. Related PostsSunday Sauce: Back next weekSunday Sauce - Vote Now!Sunday Sauce #25Sunday SauceSunday Sauce: on hiatus
Jodie Marsh - the Return
2007-12-21 15:04:00 Don’t worry, Becca, I’ll record it for you. Related Postslazy dayAugust Bank Holiday MondaySkintOn hiatusWe now return you to your regularly scheduled program More About: Jodie Marsh , Return , The Return
13 Post-Christmas Fitness DVDs
2007-12-20 17:09:00 In Britain we have a tradition of pigging out during Christmas and then making plans to exercise off the extra pounds during the new year. The diet and fitness industry fills that need with new fitness videos which are usually released on Boxing Day and tend to feature soap or reality show stars. Here’s a selection of fitness DVDs which will be released next week in the UK. 1. Natalie Cassidy’s Then And Now Workout “Actress Natalie Cassidy stars in her own exercise title, demonstrating how she lost two and a half stone.” – 2. Shilpa’s Yoga “Bollywood superstar [and Celebrity Big Brother star] Shilpa Shetty presents this guide to the yoga routines that keep her curvaceous, calm and focused.” – 3. WAGS Workout [A “WAG” is a footballer’s wife or girlfriend.] “WAGS WORKOUT is the must have accessory for all girls wanting to achieve the look and style of a WAG - and who knows, they may even bag themselves a f... More About: Fitness , Post , Dvds
Geek Me
2007-12-19 20:22:00 64% Geek 70%How Addicted to Apple Are You? – So, we’ve established that I’m a geek; but what kind of geek am I? What kind are you? I don’t think I’m represented in the 56 geeks pictured, but I could get my own personalised geek avatar from the artist [via]. Related PostsI admit itFor the lady who has everything…This One’s for the LadsCool Criminal (Ipod Oracle)
Bring it On!
2007-12-19 19:57:00 23 Baroness Becca could only take down 16 of the gremlins, but she’s much nicer than me. My signature move is the clothes line - takes 4 down in one swift move. Related PostsMomentumIs there any point in continuing?Food for thoughtThe flesh is willing…la la la More About: Bring It On
Let it Snow
2007-12-18 01:21:00 Your eyes are not deceiving you, it’s definitely snowing here! (Well it is, as long as you have javascript on your computer.) I’ve gone all festive on here, with the fancy tree and the snow; don’t you just wanna grab a handful of the white stuff and throw it at some hapless passerby? And to celebrate, here’s an interesting video clip of the original Die Hard movie set to Dean Martin’s performance of “Let it Snow ”. Related PostsDisney MemoriesFeeling better now13 Kick-Ass Heroines (Vol. 3)Guilty Pleasures, Vol 1Sunday Sauce: on hiatus
Positive Feedback
2007-12-16 21:42:00 [See post to listen to audio] Janet Jackson’s new track is called Feedback . I like it; Janet always knows how to make a great dance tune, and I bet the video will be hot. Related PostsDeath of a TyrantThe web freeze continuesSpicy AuthorN for NegativitySunday Sauce - Vote Now! More About: Positive
Sunday Sauce #25
2007-12-16 20:29:00 After reading Monty’s review of Hitman, I was compelled to feature the movie’s two lead characters in this week’s Sunday Sauce . Olga Kurylenko, Ukrainian model and actress. I’m looking forward to checking out her performance as a vampire in Paris, je t’aime The Flash Player and a browser with Javascript support are needed.. For loads more pics of Olga, check out this album at TeeMix.com – Timothy Olyphant, American actor. The Flash Player and a browser with Javascript support are needed.. – Here’s the movie trailer, featuring both actors: Related PostsSunday Sauce: Back next weekSunday Sauce - Vote Now!Sunday SauceSunday Sauce: on hiatusSunday Sauce - Reloaded
Hypothesis: Lily Allen has discovered the PR power of her own breasts
2007-12-15 22:30:00 Correlatory evidence 1 Dec 2007: Topless pic appears in the News of The World 3 Dec 2007: Sexy pics in January 2008 edition of GQ An interesting switch by the girl who said (not too long ago) that Cheryl Tweedy was a “stupid bitch” for taking her clothes off for the lad mags. Now she’s saying: “A lot of that stuff I said was because I didn’t feel confident. I felt like, ‘Oh God, I’m short, fat, ugly…and I hate all these people who flaunt their beauty’.” “Ever since a kid I’ve felt like I’m possibly the uncoolest, naffest person ever to walk the earth. But I feel great at the moment. I actually don’t have one bad thing to say about anything.” 12 Dec 2007 onwards: suddenly a plethora of nipple shots of Ms Allen are appearing around the net. I predict that Lily ’s next venture will be a sexy post-Xmas workout video… How I lost 19lbs in 6 weeks. SMILE - you can do it too... More About: Power , Lily Allen , Breasts
LOL @ JOE MOVIE CORNA
2007-12-15 16:54:00 JMC as a LOLcat site; much better than the original. And in other news, Joey goes Mac. Mission accomplished. Related PostsWho’s your PJ?13 TV Show IntrosWhat Classic Movie Are You?personality tests by s…We’re off to Band Camp…Atonement: A Review
Monty’s Movies: Hitman
2007-12-14 00:37:00 Hello Urban Recluse readers! My name is Mont y the Monkey, and you may remember me from recent blog posts like FREE MONKEY. My mama PJ took me with her to watch a couple of movies the other day, and she said that I could write about them here as long I make sure to only fling my feces in the toilet (instead of in her work shoes). We agreed that it was a reasonable deal. Hitman is a movie about a trained assassin called Agent 47 (played by Timothy Olyphant). From childhood he was raised by a secret organisation, who taught him to kick supreme ass. Agent 47 gets drawn into a conspiracy, and the only person he can trust is the gorgeous whore Nika Boronina (Olga Kurylenko). There’s also a brief appearance by Henry Ian Cusick (Desmond from Lost), who plays a Russian crimelord. Hitman is based on a video game, and it shows. I mean that in the best possible sense. During a couple of the shootout scenes the viewer is continually following Agent 47 from behind as he attacks SWAT te... More About: Movies
J.D. = Crazy
2007-12-12 21:25:00 The period between 21 August and 28 November was peaceful. The J.D. had been conquered, and had retreated to his cold dank cave to lick his wounds. Alas, he has now returned, muttering quotes from LOTR and talking about some bizarre property deal. Now we’re apparently at war again. He calls me a coward when I ignore him (as if). I should probably rise above it, like the adult I am, instead of wanting to knee him in the balls. Sigh. As William Tecumseh Sherman said: “War is at best barbarism. Its glory is all moonshine… War is hell.” I’m in hell, but I shall fight my way out. Related PostsHuman NatureTech MessThe web freeze continuesPsychic?Happy Valentine’s Day More About: Crazy
More Good Stuff
2007-12-11 00:59:00 Awarded by Becca to PJ – SamuraiFrog has officially named me as “a very good friend of Electronic Cerebrectomy” – Ben posted this funny vid for me in response to my eighth thing (see below): – And I won a premium wordpress theme worth $70 (which I’ll use for a new project). I never usually win anything. What a great day! Related PostsThings that I’m not saying out loudBunged up!The Coolest Shop in London?Keep on keeping onInterviewed by a monkey-man More About: Stuff , Good , Good Stuff
Wicked Game
2007-12-10 22:39:00 This video has been on my mind for the past few days. I love that long note he holds near the end, and Helena’s eyes are so gorgeous. Related PostsKa-Boom!And in other news…dog tired!Todo Sobre Mi Madre (All About My Mother)This One’s for the Lads More About: Game , Wicked Game , Wicked
Infected!
2007-12-10 22:24:00 Splotchy recently started a viral story, then tagged SamuraiFrog, who has now infected me. As Spiderman knows, with great power comes great responsibility, so I hope that my particular strain of this virus will infect loads more bloggers (like crabs but without the itching). Here are the terms & conditions straight from the man himself: “This has probably been done before, but that is not stopping me, oh no. Here’s what I would like to do. I want to create a story that branches out in a variety of different, unexpected ways. I don’t know how realistic it is, but that’s what I’m aiming for. Hopefully, at least one thread of the story can make a decent number of hops before it dies out. If you are one of the carriers of this story virus (i.e. you have been tagged and choose to contribute to it), you will have one responsibility, in addition to contributing your own piece of the story: you will have to tag at least one person that continues your sto... More About: Infected
Eight more things about me
2007-12-10 21:17:00 BV has tagged me to do the 8 meme again. I’m not going to tag anyone, but feel free to do it if you wanna. 1. We have to post these rules before we give you the facts. 2. Players start with eight random facts/habits about themselves. 3. People who are tagged write their own blog post about their eight things and include these rules. 4. At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged and that they should read your blog. 5. Eight is a magic number. Not three. 1. After I’ve had a good experience, especially with a guy, I count time back to the event. For instance, 2 hours ago he kissed me. 12 hours ago… a day ago… 2. I’ve read 82 books so far this year. I’m hoping to make it to 100 by the 31st. A while ago I realised that I’ve surpassed the goal of 50 books that I’d set for myself earlier in the year. 3. I rarely wear... More About: Things
Sunday Sauce #24
2007-12-10 00:48:00 My lady of the week is PAMELA ANDERSON: gorgeous actress, sex symbol, glamour model, producer, TV personality, and author. My mate Ben doesn’t seem to fancy Ms Anderson much, this week he even wrote a post about women who he thought were sexier than her. I personally think that she’s wonderful; a woman fully in charge of her image and her persona. She has been quoted as saying: “It is great to be a blonde. With low expectations it’s very easy to surprise people.” Pamela’s iconic role in Baywatch even inspired a strange man from Kazakhstan to journey to America to find the woman of his heart. The following vid clip captures the moment when Borat falls for C.J. Parker. The moment when he finally meets Pam in the flesh is also lovingly captured here. – JOSH HOLLOWAY, actor, who once said: “It’s actually very freeing to be given permission as an artist to let that ride and to really let it ride, to actually experience it and... More About: Sunday , Sauce
Busy Busy
2007-12-08 12:48:00 Sorry A.Writer and BV, I haven’t had a chance to look at your work all this week. I’ve been really busy, and I’m going out again today. I should be free all day tomorrow, so I’ll look at your work then and will get back to you asap. I’ll also update the rest of you with news about my silly mishaps. Toodles! Related Postsbusy busy!A Police Presencebusy writing!lazy dayGuilty Pleasures More About: Busy
Skeletor lives
2007-12-07 01:41:00 Actually it’s a poster advertising an exhibition of “unspeakable French works inspired by H.P. Lovecraft.” Nice. Related Posts13 Cartoon Villians (cue evil cackling)I can’t quite believe what just happened13 NovelsA Friend IndeedNo Speak English More About: Lives
Very Bad Behaviour Indeed
More articles from this author:2007-12-06 23:39:00 Sorry if you couldn’t comment here today, but for once it wasn’t my fault. I recently started using a plugin called Bad Behaviour to help thwart those evil spambots who pass through on a daily basis. Apparently the plugin owner made a boo-boo, which messed up the system and meant that blog owners like myself were locked out of our own blogs. It’s sorted now, thankfully. Related PostsRacism on Celebrity Big BrotherKa-Boom!Cold SymptomsThe End of the AffairBlogging ASBO 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 |



