Devil Writer

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Stalked by a Mongaloid
2007-05-25 09:08:00
Today I was stalked by a dangerous Mongoloid, but luckily escaped its terrible clutches. The pear-shaped puffy eyed creature began stalking me in town when I was foolish enough to make eye contact with it. Oh how sinister the Mongoloid was. Dr Koonalingus has told me many tales of Mongaloids from the Punjab that put terrible hexes upon their unfortunate victims. But such was not my fate today. I am proud to say I managed to trick it. When I was aware the Mongaloid was stalking me, I led it down a quiet street and dashed around a corner. Once around the corner, I stepped into a doorway and waited for it with my trusty cosh at the ready. When it staggered past, following my scent, I stepped out behind it and knocked it unconscious with a powerful blow across the back of its iron strong skull. It was a triumph over the wicked!

The Bitterest Jizm of All
2007-05-20 13:13:00
As a treat to me, my wife Hema arranges for me to go to a different brothel every Sunday night. This week, it was “Madam Chong’s”, a cheap downtown oriental pleasure parlour. All day I have been wolfing down huge quantities of salty foods in anticipation of my visit to the cathouse. Since breakfast I have gorged myself on bacon, anchovies, smoked cod, salted pretzels, heavily salted nuts, beef jerky, oysters, an assortment of fresh seafood and pork marinated in soy sauce. Tonight I was entertained by Mi Ling. She was a short stocky prostitute who claimed she was Japanese, but was clearly Filipino. As always, my wife prepaid the whorehouse with the proviso that I get smoked “condom free”. Mi Ling smoked hard and in a hurry. I could tell she was inexperienced. I knew she was going to love what was burning in my loins. When I blew my load, I was so dehydrated it was like busting a load of thickened glue paste. Mi Ling bravely gulped it down and shivered, shaking her head ...
More About: Rest , Eres

Glory Hole Tycoon
2007-05-20 03:25:00
This morning I received good news from Romania. My business partner Igor telegrammed me to say that I am now the number one glory hole tycoon in all of Eastern Europe. Finally my plan to properly utilise the orphans of the former dictatorship of Nikolai Chauchesku has paid off. In almost every Eastern European town I now have the former orphans working glory holes on the street and in public toilets. For those of you who lack knowledge of the subject, a glory hole is a hole in a wall (or in the partition of a public lavatory) through which men and women can receive anonymous oral sex or masturbation. The glory hole can also be used to observe obscene acts, for those that “like to watch”. Dear reader, I accept that you undoubtedly applaud me. But for all my accolades, I must confess that there were many failures on the road to this triumph. In the past I have tried to use dimwits, oafs and village idiots to man my glory holes – but I achieved nothing. Their simpleton intellects...
More About: Tycoon , Hole , Glory

The Penis of Power
2007-05-19 12:25:00
Last night I attended a soiree at the grand home of Madam Jakov, a wealthy Russian widow. At the commencement of the evening, I couldn’t help but notice the presence of a very tall bearded man who constantly shadowed our hostess. He always spoke in low tones and seemed to delight the hostess with whispered quips and cheeky anecdotes. Throughout the evening I watched the bearded devil and asked the other guests a good many questions concerning him. Many people hinted to me that he was a man-whore. Eventually I got to the truth however; he was in fact some kind of spiritual advisor who had latched onto Madam Jakov in the capacity of a “health guru”. Later at my mansion, I summoned Hans and told him to come directly. When Hans arrived, I immediately led him into the secret sorcery room where I perform the majority of my satanic rituals. Once we were dressed in our robes, I wasted no time in telling Hans about my suspicions regarding Madam Jakov’s new friend. I explained to Han...
More About: Power , Penis

Public Defecation Vulnerability
2007-05-18 07:44:00
I just received a telegram from Dr Koonalingus in Ghana, West Africa. In his communiqué he explained that in his country (India), public defection was still very much in style and hand washing was very unfashionable. Dr Koonalingus himself never washes his hands, and he is a surgeon. He also reminded me that the Indian greeting gesture called ‘Namaste’ (to bow) is a consequence of nobody in India washing their hands. In the beachside village in which his surgery is based, the locals use the nearby beach as a public toilet. According to him, at sunset on the beach, many a tourist is forced to discard their sandals after they become clogged with curried human excrement. He noted that from what he could see in Africa, public defecation was accepted but was less prevalent due to the constant violence in the society. People defecated less in the main streets and public parks because roving gangs would often seize the moment and gang rape the defecator. I paused while readi...
More About: Public , Vulnerability , Bili

Albino Nightmare
2007-05-18 05:46:00
Just now I awoke from a terrible nightmare. My clothes were drenched. I was lying in a pool of my own sweat and semen. I was confused and didn’t know where I was. My recent thoughts of my South East Asian bang bang tour had awakened the memories of what happened to me in the New Guineas on the way home from the orient. I am loath to say that the recurring nightmare of my rape at the hands of an albino transsexual savage has returned. Just when I think I am free of the nightmare, it comes back to taunt me. I cannot talk about his event any more now. For those of you who are curious, you can read the story of My Savage Bride. It’s a full and honest account of what happened to me in that heathen land of savages. But be warned, it’s hella TABOO!
More About: Nightmare , Mare , Albin

Bath Water Too Hot
2007-05-18 03:11:00
Last night my wife made a suggestion to me while doing her precoital stretching exercises. She suggested that I relive my graduation summer South East Asian sex tour on my way to Japan to establish the Grand Bukkake Dojo. I was thrilled at the suggestion and soon found myself reminiscing that summer while I strapped my wife into the love machine and lubricated our genitals. Oh the hot steamy summer nights! How the bamboo matting smelled after my semen mixed with the juices from the bodies of unwashed street prostitutes! What a fun time it was. Banging everyone in sight for the price of an apple here in my homeland. And what an ingenious devil I was. I was short of money, so instead of using condoms, I carried a couple of rolls of cheap cling film. I would shroud my magnificent shaft in the cling wrap before dipping my wick in the local women. Unfortunately cling wrap wasn’t enough to protect me. I most needed protection from myself. On several occasions I dared to have unprotected...
More About: Bath , Water

The Sketchbook of Shame
2007-05-17 07:56:00
I have just spent the afternoon entertaining my good friend Hans. He has just fled from Cyrus due to an incident involving three British Army officers. Hans was well known in the local area as an excentric ex-patriot who had a taste for illegal opiate drugs and Mediterranean prostitutes. Everyone called him “Hans the German” and from his account he was much liked. Hans and his one-eyed Sikh (turban wearing) driver met the the three off duty officers in a bar and told them the story of the ghost of an English lady that haunted a nearby abandoned house. They explained that the woman had her life strangled from her by a burglar and would do the same to anyone who slept in the master bedroom. The three Englishmen thought it was nonsense and laughed at Hans, who subsequently wagered them to accompany him to the house and spend the night. The wager was accepted mockingly and that night Hans, his scruffy driver and the three officers went to the house. Hans brought a picnic basket lad...
More About: Sketch , Sketchbook , Sham , Shame , Etch

Sunrise Masturbation Kata
2007-05-17 03:46:00
Every morning at sunrise I go out into my garden and stroll down to the pagoda. At the pagoda, I ritualistically disrobe and perform several naked Karate masturbation kata. For those of you who are not familiar with the oriental martial arts, a kata is a series of moves performed often. The aim is to practise one’s technique so that it becomes reflex. Performing the kata invigorates my mind, body and spirit. I use thickened rice oil for lubricant. My faithful Japanese man slave Hiroshi Benjo makes the rice oil in traditional fashion. As with most mornings, Hiroshi Benjo was honouring me by watching me do my kata and giving instruction. He is an expert in oriental masturbation techniques and is considered master in the “Wild Fuck Horse” and “Crazy Carp Ejaculation” techniques. It was amazing! Right when I opened the eye of the carp, I had a sudden flash of enlightenment. A shiver ran down my spine and my flying semen was more powerful than ever. A vision of my future was em...
More About: Rise , Masturbation , Sunrise , Mast

Trinity Grammar Anaconda
2007-05-16 14:16:00
Just now I have taken possession of the an incredibly taboo curio with an infamous reputation. Mr Abu Homa, a trusted associate and procurer of contraband articles, has finally obtained for me the original Trinity Gram mar Anaconda. Many people believed it destroyed, thinking it was burned to ashes in an incinerator after the hearings that followed the scandal. Mr Homa has purchased it from an unnamed individual who saved it from the fire (and has used it himself many times since). For those of you who do not know what it is. Let me explain. The Anaconda is the largest of a set of wooden dildos that were used to indecently assault the unwilling victims of some homosexually inclined bullies at an exclusive Australian private school. The Anaconda is of sizeable proportions and designed for forcible penetration. Holding it in my hands now, I strongly suspect only the loosest cunts of the Calcutta prostitute population could accommodate it without aid of quarts of lubricant and a shoehor...
More About: Onda , Naco

Rock Wiping
2007-05-16 09:25:00
This evening it has come to my attention that some primitive tribes in Africa use stones to wipe themselves after defecating in the desert. My dear Indian friend and colleague Dr Koonalingus discovered this fact while conducting research before he visited Africa on business. Both of us are much shocked by this practise. It must be uncomfortable even for a savage. I have promised Dr Koonalingus that I will do further research into the arse wiping practises of primitive cultures existing in the world today.
More About: Rock , Ping