Emotional Intelligence At Work

RSS Feed Homepage

Paul MacLane Emotional Intelligence Pioneer Dies
2008-01-10 14:48:00
Paul Maclane, neuroscientist and emotional intelligence pioneer died at age 94. I have taught MacLean's concepts of the brain in my emotional intelligence >classes for many years as a useful way of understanding "emotional hijack," A term coined by Daniel Goleman. "Emotional Hijacking" Goleman says, occurs when the amygdala, a part of the emotional brain identified by MacLane, triggers the fight or flight mechanism in response to perceived threat, and emotion overpowers the rational brain. Extract of the obituary from the New York Times follows: MacLean - Obituary - New York Times: "Paul MacLean, 94, Neuroscientist Who Devised ‘Triune Brain’ Theory, Dies Dr. Paul D. MacLean, a neuroscientist and psychiatrist who developed the intriguing theory of the ‘triune brain’ to explain its evolution and to try to reconcile rational human behavior with its more primal and violent side, died on Dec. 26 in Potomac, Md. He was 94." Dr. MacLean (pronounced mac-LANE) termed the brai...
More About: Intelligence , Emotional Intelligence , Paul , Pioneer

Emotional Intelligence for Hiring
2007-12-16 20:11:00
Employers are now more looking to: 1. Become employers of choice by creating an emotionally intelligent culture through training and development. 2. Hiring for emotional intelligence. Here are two rules for hiring from NY Times and Monster (with my comments) Hiring the Best People -- 10 Simple Rules: "2. Hire for Attitude Rather than Skill (Attitude is EQ) Teaching skills is a snap compared with doing attitude transplants. Among the qualities you'll want most is a fierce sense of optimism. (An EQ skill) 3. Look for Renegades In interviews, ask when the person has been in trouble. The obedient employee will be of limited use to you in this change-up environment. ((Do they mean authentic instead of politically correct, socialized and dependent?) " (Via .) Be well, Joseph PS Want info on the terrific Genos Emotional Intelligence Recruitment Assessment? Write me at jliberti@eqatwork.com Technorati Tags: emotional intelligence, Work, Hiring
More About: Emotional Intelligence

» Emotional Intelligence and Faces   « Brain Fitness Revolution at Shar
2007-11-16 15:39:00
» Emotional Intelligence and Faces   « Brain Fitness Revolution at SharpBrains     : "Paul Ekman has conducted extensive research on identifying emotions through facial expressions. As part of that research, and as part of the power of discipline and training, he learned how to consciously manipulate 42 facial muscles, including many that in most of us are beyond our control, and even awareness." (Via .)
More About: Emotional Intelligence

New Emotional Intelligence Webinar Tells "How To"
2007-10-25 19:38:00
The real question about emotional intelligence still is not "Does emotional intelligence work?" but rather, "How do I get it to work for me?" Ten years ago when I founded EQ At Work the most frequent comment regarding emotional intelligence I heard sounded like this: "I read about EQ and I'm convinced it's great, but how do I develop my own EQ?" Back then, there was plenty of information about why EQ was a good thing and mounting evidence of how it improved workplace performance and improved quality of life. But, there was a obvious shortage of  information on what to do. Today, years later, there's more "how to" information available but people are still looking for answers. To provide answers EQ At Work is sponsoring a free webinar. The webinar details the key ingredients for development and previews two new development courses, using proven EQ At Work methods, that are inexpensive and that you can participate in from the comfort ...
More About: Intelligence , Emotional Intelligence , Webinar , Tells , Emotional

Worldwide Support For The Environment - 50 Resources and Ways For You To He
2007-10-15 18:32:00
Today bloggers everywhere are writing in support of the environment. If those millions of blog readers who read environmental Blog Action Day posts today each get one small idea, thought, new habit, or piece of advice, then Blog Action Day has been a huge success. The world doesn’t change in huge leaps, it changes in small increments. One way for you to get involved is to learn more about the environment and find ways that you can help make a difference. In this article you will find more than 50 links to resources about the environment. Many of them provide ways for you to contribute or take action on your own, with your kids, family and neighborhood. I do not endorse any one environmental charity but here's a way to check out the charity you are thinking of donating to for a rating on their efficiency. Find out how much of your money will go to making a difference at http://www.charitynavigator.org/ One way to stay up to date is to subscribe to an RSS feed providing...
More About: Environment , Resources , Support , Worldwide , The Environment

Be a bad boss victim or choose again?
2007-10-11 17:15:00
With emotional intelligence combined with personality responsibility you can consciously choose the life you live and live the life you choose. The following is a request for advice that I received and my response. I removed the names to protect the privacy of the writer. The writer wants to know what do do after a bad boss wrecked her life. I hope that posting this letter and answer will support and inspire others. Your comments are welcome. Hello Mr. Liberti, The past year has been absolute hell for me. My bullying boss caused me to go out on stress leave; then ultimately have a nervous breakdown, two suicide attempts - result? multiple psych diagnosis’ and medications and finally, loss of my job. He destroyed my reputation within the organization, and has left me with somewhat a form of PTSD that for now, prevents me from answering to a manager. Our lives are now in shambles as I have lost an $84,000 a year job and we live off my husbands $3000 per month before t...
More About: Boss , Choose , Victim

Stressless
2007-10-01 22:42:00
Lately it seems that every business coaching client I talk to is overworked and overstressed -  Too much to do and too little time to do it. And, they discover that recognizing and effectively managing emotional agendas reduces stress, increases their effectiveness and life is easier. How do you deal with your emotional agendas? As you can tell I am experimenting with video collage to create useful messages. Your comments?

3 Ways To Deal With Obnoxious People Using Emotional Intelligence
2007-09-23 15:30:00
Dealing with obnoxious people at work requires steadfast application of your emotional intelligence. People who are behaving in a way you think obnoxious are probably in a state of emotional hijack - cognitively disabled and run by impulse. Three ways to deal with them: 1. Don't join them! Don't let yourself be hijacked too. Connect with your sense of purpose. Breathe, count do what you must but stay present and positive. 2. Try to validate their emotional experience. EG "I understand how you might be angry (or anxious or frustrated etc) about this." This doesn't always work but frequently helps defuse  emotional hijack. 3.  Don't make it personal. Don't attribute malicious intent towards you. Tell yourself "this is not about me." Because, it isn't. They may be being insensitive and ignorant but it's because of their emotional blinds spots - not about you.  Here's what Daniel Goleman recently wrote about civility. Link: Civility at W...
More About: Intelligence , Emotional Intelligence , Deal , Obnoxious

Bad Bosses: Boost Your Emotional Intelligence or Get Sued
2007-09-03 19:01:00
If you are a "bad boss" you ought to consider boosting your emotional intelligence before you get sued. Maybe you are not the ogre or abusive jerk distressed workers, writers and websites are talking about. Maybe you are just overworked and under skilled. (See my article:  5 Ways To Overcome Bad Boss Syndrome) But with growing pressure for change you may have to shape up or pay up. A bill in New Jersey would give an individual the right to seek as much as $25,000 in damages if an employer created "an abusive work environment." Similar measures are pending in New York state, Vermont and Washington state. In California, a Sacramento-based group called California Healthy Workplace Advocates is working to revive a sue-the-boss bill that died in committee in 2003. Source: Is the boss a real piece of work? - Los Angeles Times Whether or not you think you are a bad boss, it is important to know how your employees perceive you. Do they see you as someone who is empa...
More About: Intelligence , Emotional Intelligence , Boost , Sued , Emotional

Free Won’t: The Marshmallow Test Revisited at Daniel Goleman - Author of
2007-08-27 15:04:00
Link: Free Won’t: The Marshmallow Test Revisited at Daniel Goleman - Author of Emotional Intelligence and Social Intelligence. “free won’t,” the capacity to squelch an impulse. By their very nature impulses come unexpectedly and unbidden, from the mind’s unconscious. But once they come, we have choice: to act on the impulse or not. The capacity to “just say no” to dangerous impulses is one mark of emotional intelligence.

Seth Godin on being Authentic
2007-08-23 18:42:00
Eugene Kates stood for something. What do you stand for? In an age of 'the customer is king', Eugene was an anachronism. He never said things to make people happy, didn't sugar coat his point of view and he didn't compromise. Link: Seth's Blog: Authentic.A lovely blog post. Nicely said. Joseph Liberti
More About: Seth Godin , Godin

5 Ways To Deal With A Bad Boss Using Emotional Intelligence
2007-08-19 18:36:00
When you have a “bad” boss you can suffer, complain, leave or use emotional intelligence to improve your lot. There is no shortage of bad boss horror stories. Almost everyone seems to have one, and complaining is such a favorite pastime that the AFL CIO has capitalized on the popular issue and is now running its second annual contest to discover “who has the worst boss in America.”  Among the judges are Robert Sutton of “A word” fame mentioned in a previous post and Jane Fonda, who starred in the bad boss movie “9 To 5.”  Yes, I know there’s a lot of ugly truth to the stories but I believe that demonizing bad bosses is divisive and makes the problem more difficult to solve and it sure doesn’t help you much if you have one.  It is more valuable to recognize that bosses are just people like you and me with their own unique problems and issues.  Author and social activist Barbara Ehrenreich, in her article Boss es and Bossism asks us to conside...
More About: Intelligence , Emotional Intelligence , Deal , Emotional

It's No Secret - YOU Create Your Life
2007-08-14 20:43:00
You can manifest the life you truly want with clear intention, emotional intelligence and imagination. The Secret : Consciousness Create s It is no secret that you create your experience of life through the choices that you make. A Chinese proverb put it this way:  “If you want to know what kind of a life a man wants, look at the life he leads.” Like it or not, your life is what you have chosen. Yes, it’s true, you have no control over anyone else, but you do have absolute control of what you choose to feel think and do. Bring your choices to conscious awareness and you can choose a different life. In his new book, The Divine Matrix, bridging time, space, miracles and belief, Greg Braden, synthesizes some of the recent work of quantum physicists and suggests, “…the act of focusing our consciousness – of us looking somewhere and examining the world- is an act of creation in and of itself. Everywhere we look, our consciousness makes something for us to look at.” How ...
More About: Life

The Real Tancredo Solutions: Emotional Intelligence
2007-08-06 21:58:00
Tom Tancredo   gets a lot of ink for the radical things he says.  You have  heard of the Republican 2008 presidential hopeful from Colorado for his stance on immigration. His My Space profile lists  "The complete wall between the United States and Mexico." in response to the question Who I'd like to meet. Tom's YouTube Video Commercial makes his immigration position clear. He made the news this week for threatening  preemptive strikes on holy sites in Mecca and Medina to deter terrorist attacks. You can read some of the details and commentary in Tom Tancredo's final solution. - By Timothy Noah - Slate Magazine I have never met Tom Tancredo. I believe that he has noble values and truly wants to serve. I'm sure Tom Tancredo is intrinsically good and not "evil" or "absolutely crazy" as some journalists, bloggers and government officials are saying, but he does demonstrate the fearful, emotionally hijacked state that i...
More About: Intelligence , Emotional Intelligence , Real , Solutions

Emotional Intelligence Webinar For Learning And Development Professionals
2007-08-03 16:50:00
EQ At Work News: We've Combined two most popular free emotional intelligence webinars for coaches and training professionals and added more content:   Genos EI Assessment Accreditation Primer   The EQ At Work Method for Coaches And Trainers   ...Plus Tips for Learning and Development Specialists     Register now So You Think You Might Want To Become Accredited To Use EI Assessments In Your Coaching and Training   You get answers to your important questions and new insight into using assessments for emotional intelligence coaching and training including: What's driving the colossal growth in EI and what does it mean to you? What's EI got to do with personal and organizational effectiveness? What are the important differences between various EI assessments and measures?  How do you make best use of an assessment with clients What should an EI assessment do for you? What do we mean when we say Genos is a second ge...
More About: Intelligence , Emotional Intelligence , Webinar

Follow Up To No More "Ephithets"
2007-08-02 19:14:00
I took a risk when I used the "A word" (ephithet) in my recent post. It is unpleasant to me to use and write the word, and I wanted to make a point about how commonly it is used and how it perpetuates separation. Today in the blog comments I deleted a comment from a web-based service company that sends offensive "A-word" messages for a fee.  I deleted the message but the testimonial, from a well known author, that they were displaying on the front page really bothered me. I wrote to the author to get his comments and I am awaiting a response. Meanwhile I provide it for you here (author and web company names omitted) as an example of how hate spreads even in the poor attempt at humor. Your comments please? Joseph LibertiEQ At Work The Testimonial: "I'm totally pleased with this product. I began sending assholes, one per week, to a jerk I particularly disliked and, after 4 1/2 months, he died! All right, xxxxxxxxxxxxxx.com!!!"Well known author

Emotional Intelligence At Work: No More Assholes, Please
2007-08-01 20:20:00
Let’s have no more assholes and more emotional intelligence please. It has become ever more common and even hip to label people “jerks” or “assholes” in the workplace. Robert Sutton, Stanford Professor, capitalized on the appeal of this epithet to make his “No Assholes Allowed.” a best seller.   Legitimizing the term and the associated  “righteous” behavior is doing you and others real damage. If you and I want a more satisfying work life and a more harmonious world, we need to stop the name-calling and start using more emotional intelligence.  While you may not have said it aloud at work, you may have thought it or secretly confided to a friend, “What an asshole he is,” or discounted someone by saying or thinking, “She’s just an asshole.” OK, so we have all been guilty of similar behavior but that doesn’t make us right, or more effective, or for that matter happier. Four things that go wrong when you fall into the epithet trap...
More About: Intelligence , Work , Emotional Intelligence , Holes

5 Ways To Overcome The Bad Boss Syndrome With Emotional Intelligence
2007-07-15 18:02:00
Emotional Intelligence At Work: 5 Ways To Overcome The Bad Boss Syndrome With Emotional Intelligence "'People don't leave organizations they leave supervisors." That statement has been written so many times in the last five years that it would be boring if it were not so true, so sad and so expensive. Study after study cite the supervisor-employee relationship as a main threat to retention. The issue has been so prevalent that counselors have even coined a term for sufferers - "Bad Boss Syndrome." What's at the heart of this issue and how do you fix it?Employees complain that they are not recognized and valued, are treated arbitrarily. They say they are blamed and threatened instead of acknowledged, and that their supervisor communicates harshly or even abusively. The effect of that perception of the working relationship is getting more and more expensive. When labor was plentiful companies could simply rehire. Now as the war for talent spreads to more and more in...

Emotional Intelligence At Work: Be A Rat Today
2007-07-10 15:49:00
Emotional Intelligence At Work : Be a rat today and pass it forward. A Swiss research study discovered that rats demonstrated generalized reciprocity — that is, they were generous even with an unknown partner because another rat had just been kind to them. The study cites previous research showing that humans act the same way — people who have been helped in some way are more likely to help others immediately afterward. You have heard of generalized reciprocity before in the Pay It Forward book and movie that have now become a movement. Humans, and apparently rats, are wired to be generous. You have probably experienced the effects of this for yourself, but...sometimes we forget. EQ Tip: You can positively affect the culture of your workplace while fulfilling your natural desire to serve.  Make it a point to reach out and help someone today or for the rest of the week and notice what happens. Enjoy, Joseph LibertiEQ At Work
More About: Today , Emotional Intelligence , Emotion

Emotional Intelligence At Work: "Getting Over" Approval
2007-07-08 20:33:00
Liberating authentic self with emotional intelligence: Be Less Like Twiggy and More Like Popeye In the 70's Twiggy set the style for models with her twig-like slimness. Marshall McLuhan summed her up with the comment "Twiggy is an X-ray, not a picture." She was bone thin, except for her huge eyes and fat eye-lashes and she turned the desire to be thin to the desire to be thinnest. Twenty-five years later the death of 21-year-old anorexic model Ana Carolina Reston, who weighed only 88 pounds, jolted the fashion world into action to ban overly thin models. The hospital said the infection that killed the 5-foot-8-inch model was caused by anorexia nervosa, a disorder characterized by an abnormal fear of becoming obese. At the other end of the scale the sad opposite... Click here to get the rest of the story  at my True You Blog
More About: Intelligence , Work , Emotional Intelligence , Emotion , Emotional

Get EQ At Work Blog Posts For Your Site
2007-07-07 15:03:00
Get my EQ At Work blog posts for your site, blog or newsletter in an attractive widget. Add interesting and valuable content for your readers.   A sample of the actual widget appears below. You can customize the appearance to match your site.Write me to get javascript code if you need it.  Get great free widgets at <a href="http://www.widgetbox.c om">Widgetbox& ;amp;lt;/a>!
More About: Blog , Site , Posts

Leadership Emotional Intelligence - Purpose Plus People Skills = Success
2007-07-06 17:06:00
A 360 degree assessment basically asks others - supervisors, peers, direct reports and even customers to rate someone's performance. A study of 400,000 leadership 360's confirms that purpose plus people skills gets the highest performance ratings. In their book Extraordinary Leader, John H. Zenger and Joseph Folkman studied the 360-degree assessments of 400,000 leaders. One of their key findings isolated leaders whose main skill was getting results from leaders whose main skill was engaging people. The results showed no statistical difference between these groups. Results-oriented leaders got to the 90th percentile of leadership effectiveness 13% of the time, and the people-oriented leaders got there 9% of the time. And what about those leaders with both results and people competencies? A whopping 66% achieved the top level of leadership effectiveness. Link: Tofu And The Changing Nature Of Leadership - Forbes.com. The Genos 360 degree emotional intelligence a...
More About: People , Intelligence , Success , Emotional Intelligence

Emotional Intelligence At Work - Use emotional expression to connect and ga
2007-07-05 19:21:00
Emotional Intelligence At Work - Use emotional expression to connect and gain trust Emotional self-expression is a valuable skill of emotional intelligence which can be scary as well as productive. The skill is in expressing your emotions authentically and effectively. The scary part is confronting your own fears of being rejected, or being seen as weak and "inappropriate." Why would you want to express you emotions in the workplace? (Especially when the traditional approach is to "leave your feelings at the door.") There are at least three good reasons to express, which run counter to business myth:When you express your emotions you become more trustworthy and more credible. Myth has it that expressing feelings makes you suspect and that you can't be counted on to be stable. The reality is when you express effectively you are more real, credible and safe. The operative word here is effective. That means communicating in a way that others do not feel obliged ...
More About: Emotional Intelligence , Connect , Express

Develop Trust With Emotional Intelligence
2007-07-03 18:11:00
People want leaders they can trust. So say countless workplace surveys, and books and articles on leadership, but what is trust and how do you develop it? Trust is the confidence that I have in you to BE genuine, predictable, safe, principled, congruent and competent. Trust forms the foundation for successful workplace and personal relationships, effective communication and collaboration. Employee retention, and employee motivation are dependent on trust.When trust exists in an organization or in a relationship, almost everything else is easier and more comfortable to achieve. The degree to which you are trustworthy will determine the value of your personal brand and your career or entrepreneurial success.  So how do you increase your trustworthiness? Here's three important ways:First Trust YourselfTrust Yourself. Stop and ask yourself about yourself: What are you certain of? What do you stand for? What are you competent in? What are you confident about?  Your answer...
More About: Intelligence , Emotional Intelligence , Rust , Emotion

Use Your Anger To Gain Clarity
2007-06-29 15:34:00
You can use your anger with emotional intelligence to gain clarity and make better decisions. Bhudda said, "Holding onto anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned." With all respect to Bhudda, holding onto your anger briefly, with emotional intelligence, can dissipate it's energy and it's ability to compel your behavior and... open up new possibilities. Anger is frequently a cover up for something else. For example:  You react with anger when someone cuts  you off on the freeway but what is really happening is you got scared when you thought your life was at risk. Or, you are irritated with the impending changes at work and resist but what's really going on is you are fearful of losing security. Working with your anger briefly reveals deeper meaning and enables better choices. EQ Tip: Try this. Hold onto your anger briefly, focus your attention on it and have this conversation with yo...
More About: Clarity , Clar

Using Humor To Build Rapport
2007-06-28 17:12:00
Emotional Intelligence Tip: Using Humo r To Build Rapport Building rapport is a valuable skill of emotional intelligence. When you establish a real connection between yourself and others you can transcend differences and create a context of possibility where all solutions are possible. One of the techniques we teach in our advanced EQ coaching class is called "enrollment" - the process of building extraordinary rapport and getting buy-in for your ideas or activities.  Enrollment is essentially the process of invitation and acceptance. You invite, they accept - connection made. I frequently like to do this with appropriate humor and I recently had an experience that is a great example of mutual connection.What's Appropriate?When I say appropriate I mean genuine and effective. Humor that is non-judgmental, conscious and not harmful to anyone. In this case I used humor as an icebreaker. Tell 'em Mike Sent YouI had been referred to an auto transmission repair shop and ...

Emotional Intelligence At Work: The Essence of Connecting
2007-06-26 16:22:00
Emotional Intelligence At Work : The Essence of Connect ing Link: Study Says Chatty Doctors Forget Patients - New York Times. Doctors are told that they must make a connection with patients. But, Dr. Borkan said, “the instruction is often imprecise — how do you make a connection?” Many think the way to do it is by talking about themselves.Doing The Form But Not The EssenceDr. Howard B. Beckman, medical director of the Rochester Individual Practice Association and an internist who was an author of the study, analyzed conversations between doctors and patients. “I’d been saying for many years that disclosure was a form of patient support,” Dr. Beckman said. “If someone says, ‘I have a problem,’ and you say, ‘I understand because I have it, too,’ that would be comforting.” But, he added, “in truth that never happens.” "Patients were not comforted, he said, and conversations got off track. Four out of five times when a doctor interjected personal info...
More About: Emotional Intelligence , Emotion

Emotional Intelligence Tip: Good Vibrations from Validation
2007-06-24 16:06:00
Emotional Intelligence Tip: Good Vibrations From Validation To positively influence others or manage conflict you first need to connect - to create rapport or resonance. Sometimes the situation can make connection challenging but one thing that is uniquely effective is validation. Yesterday I was treated to a great experience and example of this when Jane called. "Hello this is Jane from LDS calling," she said.  "If anything can go wrong ...If It Could Happen It Happened To You "Hello this is Jane from LDS calling," she said.  "If anything can go wrong getting started with our service, it all seemed to happen to you. First you experienced disappointment with a bad product, then you were frustrated by a long wait while we corrected the problem and even had to worry about errors in billing. I'm happy to say we've got it all straightened out now. Do you have a few minutes to talk?"  Validating Emotional ExperienceIn that opening s...
More About: Emotional Intelligence

Yes, And Emotional Intelligence
2007-06-23 19:14:00
Using emotional intelligence and leading with a yes will improve your results, and could get you more business or improve your reputation, but you may have to break a habit and let go of your story. Oh Maaaan"We are building a cabin in your area and I am interested in buying a large propane tank and arranging for propane delivery. Can you help me?" I asked. "Where do you live and how big a tank do you want?" she said. I gave her my location and told her I thought I needed a 250 gallon tank and wanted the kind I could bury in the ground. "Oh maaaan," came the disgusted-sounding response. "Why would you want to do that?" I gave my reasons and she told me why that was a mistake, gave me some prices and said "I don't know about delivery in that area, you'll have to talk to the boss." We Don't Do That"This is Mo. How can I hep you? said the boss when he came on the line.We Don't Do That "This is Mo. How can I hep you? sa...
More About: Intelligence , Emotional Intelligence , Emotion , Emotional

EQ Tip: Pay attention to feelings
2007-06-18 18:40:00
Link: EQ Tip: What's EQ?. "every workplace or life event has within it your feelings, your thoughts and the choices that you make that determine your actions and your results."A new coaching client was describing to me his conversation with a potential customer. As he described the prospect's apparent resistance to his consulting service he said, "you know how people regard consultants," and went on. I stopped him for some coaching. He became aware of how he feels when he thinks his value is challenged. He also became aware that his habitual reaction was costing him business.  Today I got an email from him telling me that by paying attention to his feelings in a similar conversation with another prospect,  he was able to be more resourceful and got an invitation to do a presentation at the prospect's company. Paying attention to what you are feeling can be profitable in more ways that one. Joseph Liberti
More About: Feeling , Feel , Feelings , Attention , Tent