Oh, The JoysOh, The JoysWhere the mother of two toddlers who are only 15 months apart thrills you with tales of the mundane from the House of Joy where every day is the same. Articles
Collages
2008-04-18 12:45:00 Remember when we used to write in private journals with lovely covers and thick, rich paper?I used to write in spiral and hard bound journals instead of out here on the Internet.Similarly, before I had photoshop I used to do collage.A few days ago I wrote about a collage that I made.Some of you asked me to post a photo of it, but I don't have one.The piece is really large and doesn't fit well in a single photo frame.Every time I try to take a photo of even one of the female figures, the glare from the glass makes the image impossible to see.[Maybe I have to invite Angela over to get a proper photo of it.]Anyway, as I trolled through my photos to see if I did have any of this particular collage, I found the sketch that I did first, the drawing that led to the collage.I'm terrible at drawing.[The figure representing my mom is particularly scary -- sorry, Mom!](I think you can click on the picture to enlarge the view.)[I feel compelled to tell you that there are no pubes or boobs in... More About: Memories , Collage
Eleven Windows
2008-04-17 14:00:00 jen did this post called seven windows of my soul.It inspired me.Although... this one goes to eleven.[In no particular order.]Windows to My Soul1. Sitting on my grandparent's back porch and seeing the tree line on the horizon beyond the pasture.2. Flying and feeling weightless high above the Zambezi river and Victoria Falls over Zambia & Zimbabwe. Seeing a 360 degree rainbow, a full circle.3. The stare of a young Rajastani woman's kohl lined eyes through my dusty bus window in the Indian desert.4. Watching the night sky from the Wat in Doi Mae Salong, Thailand as it filled with streaks of light from a Leonid meteor shower.5. My frozen memory of my grandmother?s face at the very last moment of her life.6. Alone, swimming into the sunset at Kendwa Beach in Zanzibar.7. Walking with lions on the veld in Gweru, Zimbabwe.8. Visiting the grave of Stephen Biko.9. Watching the twin tower's fall.10. My first look at the faces of my children.11. Holding hands with my love on an autumn w... More About: Reflection
Not the Center
2008-04-16 12:45:00 I had to take her with us.It was spring break, I had both kids and no daycare.The Mayor had to go to his occupational therapy appointment so he could work on repairing the nerve damage in his hand.The Rooster had to come too.Of course she wanted to do everything The Mayor did but the physical therapist wouldn't allow it.She wouldn't let poor Rooster... join in any hand therapy games.[Oh, I keeeell myself.]Rooster couldn't touch anything in the therapist's full-tilt, super-fun, play gym.As any two and a half year old would, The Rooster became frustrated after hearing the word "NO!" so frequently.I wanted to watch The Mayor's treatment, but I finally had to take The Rooster out of the room.I headed for the bathroom because, well... I had to go.[I should have kegeled.]Once we were in the bathroom with the door closed, The Rooster burst into tears.She sobbed and sobbed as if in dire anguish."What's wrong, Roo? What happened?" I asked, worried that she had somehow hurt herself."Her... More About: Center
Oh, the Geriatric Pele
2008-04-15 14:30:00 This weekend we arranged a play date at the park for The Rooster and one of her friends from daycare.I played soccer with the nine year old brother of Rooster's friend while the other parent watched the girls on the playground.I used to play competitive soccer when I was in elementary and middle school, but I?m pretty sure my last season was when I was in sixth grade.Nevertheless, I was impressed with my speed and agility.[Look at me go!]I kicked the ball with amazing force and precision![I am an Olympic Soccer Super Star!!!]I played so hard and ran so fast that I wore the nine year old out. He got winded and had to quit first.[Ha!]I was feeling really proud of my self and, because I am not very mature, I taunted my nine year old friend.?I a-am faster. I a-am stronger.? I sang while shaking my butt in little victory shimmies.He grinned, rolled his eyes and told me to shut up.However, I am a serious idiot.Oh, my aching HUBRIS!!I am in desperate need of some sort of butt massaging de... More About: Friends , Idiocy , Pele
Shower Gifts
2008-04-14 16:00:00 When The Mayor was less than a week old, my mom noticed that his inner thighs were completely black and blue. We called the pediatrician and they asked us to bring him in. The intake nurse was pretty disconcerted when she saw his legs. One after another, the pediatricians filed in to have a look. The Mayor seemed fine, didn?t appear to be in any pain and didn?t wince or cry when the black and blue spots were touched. The doctors couldn?t figure out what was wrong with him. This weekend, I went to my friend Tomi?s baby shower. Seeing all the tiny newborn clothes reminded me of The Mayor?s shower, being close to the end of my first pregnancy and being a new mom. I thought about his tiny, little diapers. At the baby shower that my friend Michele threw for me, the guests were given a marker and a stack of newborn diapers. Each guest wrote messages and drew pictures on the diapers so that K and I would be amused during 3:00 a.m. feedings. The diapers were hilarious. They... More About: Gifts , Motherhood , Shower , Puzzles , Idiocy
Dance of the Four Mothers
2008-04-11 21:00:00 There?s a collage hanging in The Mayor and The Rooster?s room that I made around the time I was getting a divorce from my first husband.In it, there are five women standing on a plain white background.The first four women have mermaid tails but the fifth woman is standing up on two legs with her mermaid tail thrown over her arm like a shawl.Each figure in the collage represents one of the women in a family photo showing the five generations of women alive when I was born ? from my Great, Great Grandmother right down the line to me.My Great, Great Grandmother lived to be 100 years old. In her lifetime, she saw transportation shift from a horse and buggy to a rocket to the moon.In the collage, one of her hands holds a whole solar system and the other holds the ripples from a single drop of water in a still pond.I used to sit by her bedside at the end of her life listening to her stories and trying to absorb the wisdom of her experience. My Great Grandmother appears next in the collag... More About: Family , History , Dance , Traditions , Mothers
Oh, The Prom
2008-04-11 14:04:00 I don't remember much about my junior prom.My mom made my dress, we didn't have a limo, he wasn't my boyfriend and nothing happened.Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.I went to my senior prom with a boy named Jim who had only recently lost his baby fat.Until our senior year he was, well... short and round-ish, but then he grew forty five feet and his extra weight spread out across the new length of him.Suddenly, he was [kinda sorta] cute.He took me by surprise when he asked me to prom.I was deep in the process of shifting into my I wear black and am too cool for everything phase.I was certainly ABOVE the prom.But then... he asked.All of my (also too cool) girlfriends seemed to be coming up with last minute dates, so I accepted.Though my mother made most of the dresses that I wore to school dances, I didn't give her any lead time on this one so she had no choice but to take me shopping.I somehow ended up with a pink and black number that incorporated a crinoline underskirt.Oh, the pretty.At t... More About: Prom , Memories
Mother Groove
2008-04-10 13:35:00 It?s spring break at daycare, so I?ve been home with the short and loud people this week.[Hence The Incredible Lightness of Posting.]As a working mom, I never had the opportunity to learn the stay-at-home-mom Zen that so many of my peers seem to have.If I am honest, I have to admit that spring break used to scare me. How on Earth would I pass the hours? How would I keep my sanity? Don?t leave me alone with them!!!!!!!!!!NOOOOOOOOO!!!![Roll horror music - ree! ree! ree!]I don?t know if I finally found my mothering groove or if my kids are just easier now.Maybe it?s both.Regardless, I?m grateful that I?ve spent most of this week pushing swings, brushing sand off little fingers and riding the mini-train at the zoo.It?s a privilege and a gift to have this time with them.Today I think we'll take a walk around the block. Who knows what we'll discover... More About: Motherhood , Mother , Groove
Spring Is Worse Than Tequilla
2008-04-09 02:00:00 Driving home from the market tonight, I noticed the scores of spring blossoms flagrantly waving themselves at the passing traffic.Sluts!!All the cars and even the streets themselves were dusted in bright yellow pollen.Oh, what a whorish season!I came to a stop at a red light and looked over at the car next to me.The passenger had these giant, chocolate brown eyes.[Oh, swoon!]He was staring at me in this intense, way. His look seemed so innocent, so full of pure love.I found myself grinning dreamily at him. I might have imagined it, but I think I saw his ears perk up at my smile.The driver, a man who had eyes that matched the passenger's, turned to look into my car.He totally busted me...flirting... with his dog.Oh, saucy season of Spring ! What have you done to me?I was left with no choice but to rush home, burst through the door and shout..."Bark like a dog, sweet husband!"[Bow chicka bow wow!] More About: Idiocy
When Married People Snort
2008-04-07 03:01:00 Saturday night we were invited to dinner by a couple we don't know well, the parents of a girl that Rooster plays with at daycare.Until Saturday we had never socialized with them beyond running into them at the school and the odd meeting at the local playground.I like them both, but I was a little nervous.[How long would it take for these cool people to figure out what a complete and utter dork I am?]When we arrived, their daughter (my daughter's friend), appeared at the top of their staircase to greet us.She was completely naked.She stretched her arms to the heavens and spread her legs wide apart."Ta DA!" she yelled.Her mom blushed."Ta DA!!" she yelled again jumping down a step.She jumped down one step at a time and with each landing she announced her impressive nakedness with another, "Ta DA!"Her mom hurried her back up the stairs to dress her, but before she went she told us that her husband was taking a shower because he had just finished cooking.In an act of extreme culinary ... More About: Marriage , People , Friends , Going Out , Neighbors
Pulitzer Prize for Drama
2008-04-04 22:00:00 The Rooster has a doll named Baby Stella.She meant to bring it with her to school today, but she forgot.Because I wouldn't go back and get it for her, I had to suffer Tennessee Williams all the way to daycare.Oh. Mah. Got. More About: Drama , Pulitzer , Idiocy
Oh, The Bovine
2008-04-03 16:30:00 For the last three days I've been facilitating an out of town meeting for work.The participants were bowled over by my facil-ee-tay-shun skillz and could barely contain their enthusiasm for every topic I introduced.They were rapt, rapt I tell you!!The only down side to the beautiful meeting location were the swarms of biting "no see 'ums."I don't know why they're called no see 'ums, I mean, I could TOTALLY SEE 'EM!Anyway, the bugs bit me incessantly.One of the meeting participants (that I had just met) said,"Well there's one in every herd.""Excuse me?" I said."In every herd there's one cow genetically predisposed to attract biting bugs, you know, to keep them away from the other cows. You must be the cow that protects the herd."Um... is it me, or did she just call me a cow? More About: Work , Idiocy
Skipping Blog Town
2008-04-03 03:52:00 Oh, uh.. Hai!Did I forget to blog?I must have been out of town.Like, for work.Where it was really beautiful and distracting... More About: Travel , Work , Blog , Town
Little Froggy
2008-04-01 04:00:00 “Mama, we went outside to get the paper and we saw afrog!!” I was intrigued and impressed.[Despite being sound asleep when I received this news.]An amphibian?In my front yard?[Which is nowhere near a creek.]A frog?We’re in the middle of a drought!!How wondrous!!“Where was the frog, Roo?” I asked. “Outside!!” she exclaimed.[Oh, the vagueness of toddlers!]She led me out to the breakfast table and K served me a plate of eggs.[Because he is a Golden God.]“So you guys saw a frog?” I asked with uncharacteristic morning enthusiasm.“What?” K said, clearly confused.“Roo said that you guys saw a frog when you went out to get the paper. Where was it?”K looked puzzled for a second and then something clicked. “Rooster,” K said, "it was a little FOGGY outside.”[Ba dum bum CHA!] Oy. Soon I'll be playing the Catskills... More About: Froggy
Not Leaving
2008-03-31 04:30:00 My body's shifting movements alerted her to my imminent departure."I want you," she whined.We already read our three stories. Our three songs were sung. "I want you," she cried, holding two of my fingers too tightly.She wrapped her arms around my neck and said again,"I want you."Most nights, she goes to sleep easily and by herself but occasionally she begs me to stay close.Because an endless list of tasks awaits me in the narrow space between her bedtime and mine, I usually don't stay."Mommy needs to sleep in her own bed," I offer while thinking impatiently of all the things I have to do first.Inexplicably, I spent most of my weekend acutely aware of how everything could change at any moment. It was completely morbid, but it made every interaction seem like a last chance, a rare gift.So for the last two days, every time she went to sleep I curled myself around her smallness, breathed in the smell of her hair and sang our lullaby until I recognized the steady cadence of her sleepi... More About: Marriage , Motherhood , Leaving
Surrounded
2008-03-29 01:50:00 "Open your hand, Mama.""Why?" I say, pretending I don't know."Because I want to leave a kiss in your hand!""But why?" I ask again, playing dumb."So you can put my kiss in your pocket and save it for later."Each and every one of my pockets, in every pair of pants and in every jacket, overflows with kisses that spill out every where.The wind lifts them up and they swirl all around me like a petal storm. More About: Family , Motherhood
Saving Stuff
2008-03-28 15:30:00 Do you ever think about what you would rescue if you woke up in the middle of the night and the house was on fire?It's morbid, I know, but I think about it sometimes.Hmmm.... what would I save?[This assumes The Mayor, The Rooster and K are all completely safe already, of course.]Would it be a quilt that my Granny made?A vanity cabinet that my grandfather built?My Preppy Handbook diary from High School?[Ugh! No! Come to think of it, I should burn that diary this afternoon!]Just one thing?Ack!There are too many things attached to too many memories.I try remember that it's all "just stuff" but it is hard.Maybe I should ask my brain to go easy on me and, when it wakes me in the middle of the night, ask me something simple like,"What wouldn't you put in your YMCA locker (which you NEVER lock) because you would be totally bummed to lose it?"[Oh, the frivilous questions that are easily answered!!]The Frye boots that I have always been too cheap practical to buy... but found (brand new ... More About: Stuff , Saving , Idiocy
He Ain't Heavy, He's My Blog Post
2008-03-27 14:00:00 Come to the dark side, Luke!" K said, channeling James Earl Jones."Don't listen to him, Luke!" I urged.Organizing his own entertainment for the morning commute, The Mayor assigned the role of Darth Vader to K and the role of Red Darth Vader to me.[You haven't heard of Red Darth Vader? Me neither.]Black Darth Vader urged Luke (a.k.a. The Mayor) to become evil while Red Darth Vader encouraged him to resist and remain true to the Jedi."It's much harder to be good," Red Darth Vader reminded Luke.The Mayor weighed his options and PLAYED the two adult Vaders.[Who were, perhaps, a little too into the game. What's that about?!!]While K and I play-debated the virtues of good vs. evil, The Rooster quietly ate dry breakfast cereal in her car seat.Just as we were dropping K at the commuter rail station she piped up and, in her most sweet and innocent voice, said..."Mommy and Daddy, I am on the dark side."Hearing my baby girl swear allegiance to the dark side sent a chill down my spine.Not... More About: Beauty , Post , Blog , Motherhood , Heavy
All Women Are Supposed To Be Able
2008-03-26 13:24:00 My oldest friend has had a really rough time getting pregnant, but is now in her third trimester preparing for the arrival of the small boy curled inside her belly whose name will be Jack.She and I have been somewhat estranged since the birth of my children, but I got an e-mail from her yesterday updating me on the pregnancy and sharing her feelings about learning that she will have to have a scheduled c-section.I asked her permission to post excerpts of her letter and she agreed.Though I did not deliver by c-section, I imagine some of what she is feeling is normal and that many others have been through it before.This particular friend isn't a blogger so she has never experienced the power of the mighty internet and this community of mothers.I would be grateful if, after you read her words, you leave something encouraging for her in the comments section.It is an enormous relief to know we're not alone.Here is her letter.*..6 weeks and counting!Date: 03/24/2008Well, we found out to... More About: Women , Friends , Pregnancy , Motherhood
Child Grills Heathen
2008-03-25 12:00:00 "Why does Gid go to Hebrew school?" The Mayor asked as we drove to his hand therapy appointment. "Well... uh... to learn about his faith," I said. "Why don't I go to Hebrew school?" "Because Gid is Jewish and you are Catholic. When The Rooster turns three we'll start going to church so you can learn about being Catholic.""Are you Catholic, Mommy?" "Well... no, but your Dad is and so... you are too." [Because Dad said so.] "What will I do at Catholic school?"[Eat donuts!]"You'll learn about God, I guess.""Where does God live?""Up in the sky... and... all over the place, everywhere. From the highest part of the sky right down to the inside of your body.[Who do I think I am having this conversation at all?]"How can God be everywhere in the sky and in my body, Mommy?" [Do I look like a freakin' theologian?] "Uh... he can live everywhere because God is... um... he is... uh...God is love."[Aw, yeaaaah! Now I'm on a ROLL!] "Mama, what is love?"[Doh!]"You know that happy feeling yo... More About: Child
Genetics
2008-03-24 13:00:00 “Let’s play that if you finish your dinner first then you win and if I finish my dinner first then I win,” The Mayor said to me.“Okay,” I said smugly, knowing I would win. [Look kid, I’ve been inhaling my food since the day you were born!]I tried to eat slowly to let him win, but there is no pace as slow as a toddler eating and, as I knew I would, I finished first.When I showed The Mayor my clean plate he instantly went from sunny to thunderstorms and yelled,“YOU CAN NEVER PLAY THIS GAME WITH ME EVER EVER AGAIN!”“You don’t like to lose do you Mayor?” I said calmly.“NO! NO! NO!” he yelled.K smirked and made a face that mocked me.I don’t like to lose either. Not. At. all.[K and I had to give up playing the game formerly known as Scrabble (now known as DIVORCE) because of this.] I thought about how much I hate to lose as I sat with the kids while they finished dinner.I pondered whether or not my deep aversion to failing kept me from taking important risks.... More About: Genetics
Where Were You When...
2008-03-21 11:45:00 In September of 1988, I spent my twenty first birthday on a flight to England.I was on my way to study abroad for a year, leaving my family and a serious boyfriend behind.Despite being scared, I bravely set off... for the glamor, the dream...Europe!I was immediately made acutely aware of my obviousness as a foreigner.[And I mean foreigner in the "does not fit in at all" sense, not the "Wow! Isn't she exotic and exciting?!" sense.]First, my clothes were all wrong.[The good people of The Tea Sipping Land were blinded by the sheer brightness of my fashunz.]Second, my accent was a liability.When a Brit comes to the U.S. their accent makes them an instant celebrity.?Like, OMG! Say something!? we swoon. ?We just LOVE your accent!!?It was the opposite for me.?Oh, you?re American,? they?d say glancing around for a more promising conversation.Third, I was way. too. loud. (and dorky).Walking home one day, I saw my flatmate in our kitchen window.When I arrived at our door, I kicked it open,... More About: Travel , History , Memories
Doves
2008-03-20 02:15:00 Severe storms delivered a sucker punch to my tornado stricken city today.In a mass demonstration of inanimate fatalism, hundreds of skyscraper windows leapt from the safety of their casings and plummeted to the sidewalk leaving the streets covered in sparkling shards of glass.Driving home from an afternoon meeting, I saw people of all kinds standing in the rain holding anti-war signs on a street corner.I stopped at a red light and looked around at my fellow commuters. Most of them seemed oblivious to the protest on the sidewalk.I wondered if the protesters felt ignored.A young, African American woman in a bright, orange rain coat held up a sign that said,"No Torture."Her message reminded me of that photo of a hooded Iraqi prisoner trying to comfort his visiting son and a post I read offering a detailed explanation of the practice of waterboarding. I remembered both making me feel completely hopeless.I honked my car horn and the young woman in the orange coat looked over at me.I wav... More About: Reflection
Vindicated
2008-03-18 02:43:00 I think it might be the first time that feeling vindicated has made me want to cry.I knew something was wrong with The Mayor's hand and I was right.The surgeon saw him again today (only because I made a nuisance of myself) and determined that breaking his arm also caused medial nerve damage affecting the normal use of his thumb and forefinger.According to the surgeon, the pain in his hand probably feels "like hot sprinkles."[Now where have I heard that before, Dr. Brainiac?]The doctor prescribed occupational / physical therapy.[I don't understand which one or the difference between them.]We have to take The Mayor once or twice a week until... The doctor couldn't say for sure.It could be for three months. It could be for two years.Meanwhile...The Mayor woke up this morning with generic body-goop oozing from his right ear.Apparently, his ear drum decided to spontaneously combust.[Because he clearly doesn't have enough going on.]Between the ear and the hand, The Mayor and I spen... More About: Vindicated
Shell of A Post for Silly Photo Display Purposes
2008-03-16 20:45:00 My friend Deana and I rented a car to drive to Nashville.The problem with making an "economy weekend special" reservation is that Enterprise gives you a flying tic tac and calls it a car.The Flying Tic TacI was a bit worried when we arrived at our hotel.In the parking lot, Angry Road Rage Man unloaded a mouthful of bile on me for no good reason."If you were a guy I'd be in jail right now!" he screamed.No more coffee for YOU, Mr. Road Rage Man!Then my hotel's elevator walls were covered in pony hide.Is it me or does red pony hide just SCREAM super classy?At first, I worried that my bed might vibrate, but I was immediately distracted by the dress on display in the lobby...Ouch! Pointy!The dress was made entirely of pink crayons.Where could someone most appropriately wear such a garment?We asked the dimly lit hotel clerk to recommend a good, local bistro so we could eat before the Ani DiFranco show."Hmmm," she said, "local BEE-STROW?"I knew what was coming from experience."Oh! I know... More About: Photo , Shopping , Travel , Friends , Post
Monkey See, Monkey Do
2008-03-14 15:20:00 My friend Deana flew to town yesterday.The last time she was here was right before The Rooster was born."The Rooster can be a little shy sometimes," I warned her.Deana and I drove to the daycare center to pick up the kids.When we got there they were all playing outside.I went in to sign them out and Deana waited on a bench in the kid's play area.When I came back out Deana was surrounded by a cluster of little girls including Roo.As I came closer I heard The Rooster say,"I have monkeys on my butt. Wanna see?"Then Rooster dropped her pants and showed her big girl undies to a complete stranger.Clearly, she has no shame.I can't imagine where she gets that from....and now Deana and I are off to Nashville to see Ani DiFranco. We're young, wild and freeeeeeeeeeee.[At least for tonight.] More About: Friends , Monkey
The Morning After "The Fire"
2008-03-14 14:00:00 Catherine and Tracey asked me to take a photo of myself first thing in the morning and publish it here.Ho-kay.Here it is...Oh, dat's right.Fire fighters are the new Park Rangers, baby!National Park Rangers are so last year.[Snap!]For more of the hot wimmins in their first-thing-in-the-morning glory, clickity click here:HBMSweetneyBreed 'Em & WeepMissus MamaloguesMrs. FlingerMs. MotherBumperIzzyOTJAnyone can participate in this theme post. All you are asked to do is copy the list of participants and add it to the bottom of your post -- and don't forget to add yourself! More About: Morning , Idiocy
Beady Eyed Peeps & The Bad Bunny Anthology
2008-03-13 14:00:00 The ransom note came home yesterday."Deliver the plastic eggs filled with candy or live with the shame of your performance as a mother forever!!!"It's time to buy the effing school egg hunt supplies again.[Week after week, it's always something... cupcakes, valentines, craptastic plastic something or other...]Now I have make a trip to the Whale*Mart and brave the aisle full of scary peeps.[Is it just me or are peeps a little menacing?]In fact, Smilin' Mighty Jeebus and his risen-ness aside, the whole holiday is a little freaky.It's not just the peeps, the bunnies are scary too.What? You don't agree?"Judge, I submit my evidence..."Ninja Bunny Vampire BunnyBunzillaBunzilla's Cousin EarlThe Dread Pirate RabbitsCarnivorous, Man-Eating Bunny #1Carnivorous, Man-Eating Bunny #2 Carnivorous, Man-Eating Bunny #3 Carnivorous, Man-Eating Bunny #4 Carnivorous, Man-Eating Bunny #5 Carniverous, Man-Eating Bunny #6 Ghost Bunny "I rest my case!"Good dog! [And even so, still I must brave ... More About: Holidays , Idiocy , Anthology
Restless
2008-03-12 16:03:00 I woke up at 5:13 this morning worrying.I realize worrying isn?t that helpful but I can?t stop.The Mayor still won?t use his arm but it?s not really the arm that I?m worried about.The elbow seems fine, a little stiff maybe? I haven?t seen him straighten it all the way, but it seems healed.What worries me is that he won?t use his hand.He won?t let anyone touch his hand nor will he let his hand touch anything.The hand is covered in a thick layer of dead skin that makes it look like a reptile desperate to molt.Though he usually holds it in odd and uncomfortable looking positions, when he sleeps it dances in the air above him as though responding to a snake charmer?s flute.What is he working out in his slumber?Does it hurt too much when he's conscious?When The Mayor is awake he endlessly teeter totters back and forth over his own legs because of the sudden, jerky way that the hand and arm shoot out and throw him off balance. He bites his shirt collar to still himself somewhat, but the... More About: Motherhood , Restless
In Fact I Hang Out with My Best Friend's Husband
More articles from this author:2008-03-11 19:00:00 Okay, okay.So I?m a hypocrite and a liar.I said I wouldn?t / don?t / won?t hang out with your husband, right?Well, mea culpa.K was out of town for the weekend, so what did I do?I went and got all WILD with some husbands.I ran into my friend Michele's husband and their children at the park.Aaron had given Michele the afternoon off and was at the playground with another Dad and his kids.[Count with me now... one, two. Two dads.]When I overheard Aaron ask the other Dad if he wanted to mojametize to a local Mexican restaurant for dinner, do you know what I said?Was it,?May I join you??Nope.Was it,?Would you mind if I tagged along??Nope.Was it,?I?ll go.?Bingo.[Shameless HUSSY!!!]Aaron looked at me oddly.?What? What is it?? he said.He thought I said his son's name and scanned the playground for him.?I'll go to the restaurant,? I repeated.?Oh! Okay!? he said, trying to hide his surprise.It was Sunday night, K's plane was delayed, I'd been on my own with the short and loud people for... More About: Fact , Hang , Husband , Idiocy 1, 2, 3, 4 |
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