.a day in the life of a fool.

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Articles: 1, 2

show me how you'll look 30 years from tuesday
2006-12-02 15:35:01
Yesterday was fun. With the Italian flag on each cheek, I got a lot of screams, "FORZA ITALIA!!!" and a couple people coming up to me speaking Italian. It was awesome. After the concert, Jules and I went to the deli to get cold drinks, and one of the neighbors started talking to me about where his family is from in Italy. He asked if I was Italian, and I said Sicilian... then he told me he can tell... it's my eyes. "I Siciliani hanno sempre questi occhi belli." It was sweet. And so strange, because it's not the first time someone's said to me my eyes are Sicilian. Boh. I always thought I had my dad's eyes.We came upstairs and I packed my stuff, and we walked two blocks over to my new apartment. It's nice. It's peaceful. Exactly what I need right now. I fell asleep with the AC on and woke up freezing my ass off, but other than that, I love it.I didn't want to do anything today. *Sigh* But my laptop is a piece of shit, so I'd really like to get another already. I was going to ...
More About: Show , Years , Tuesday , Look , Year

...apparently, you won't
2006-12-02 15:35:01
After reading the last couple comments I got on the last entry (I deleted them because I don't want anyone to get shit for it), I realized that as much as I try to write every aspect of what I'm going through out so people will understand, some people just won't.I'm totally not angry at the person whose comment sparked my epiphany at all, but ya know... I feel really shitty about putting my heart and soul out there and into this blog. I have no idea why I have such a need to feel understood. Perhaps it's the fact that I've been misunderstood my entire life. Maybe I need to feel accepted like I never thought I was before. Maybe I just expect too much of people. Who knows. But right now, I feel like such an ass... trying to convey all that I feel and all that I'm going through in hopes that the people in my life will understand, and instead, I feel judged.Maybe I'm just PMSing, but I'm not doing it anymore. At least not until I get my life together to the point where I...
More About: Rent , Appa , Parent , Pare

won't you listen to me till it's talked away
2006-12-02 15:35:01
I've come to realize that even though I'm not good at it, and the spell check comes in very handy sometimes, and my grammar is for the birds, writing is totally my therapy.That said, I'm sitting here with a shitload of stories to tell from the moments I've experienced within the past 24 hours, and a brain crowded with thoughts, epiphanies, wishes, regrets and ideas... and yet I can't seem to find a way to articulate it. I don't know where to start or where to end. I have so much to work out in this head of mine, but I'm so emotionally exhausted, my fingers have already started to cry for mercy. They must know what lies ahead. And I feel like I have to write, because once I do, I'll have put them out there, where they can no longer suffocate me.Please pardon my extremely emo mood, for I've just seen the movie "Cold Mountain." If you haven't seen it, don't. If you have, you know exactly the mood I'm in.Alright, I'll start with the movie. I hated it. I normally don't like...
More About: List , Talk , Listen , Away

tweedle dum, there's no com-par-i-son
2006-12-02 15:35:01
Happy 100th Blog Entry to ME!...damn, I talk a lot.I don't know why I'm saying that when NO ONE WILL COMMENT ANYWAY. Seriously, folks, as viewers? You suck. But it's alright... this is the one place on earth that's about me. (Though Chris would tend to disagree).I'm having a conversation with one of my old teachers from Pali right now. What the hell? Myspace is either the anti-christ, or a true blessing. I guess it's the latter; it's brought Shirley & me closer again. We've been talking every night for the past week now. I really missed that.But wow. I made a comment on this teacher's myspace page, and he wrote me a message. Now we're talking about the fact that NYC sucks because it doesn't have In 'N' Out or Carls, Jr.What was I thinking?!?!?!Oh. About that last post. Yeah, I'm really starting to see how different the way of life is here as opposed to the City of Angels. I love this city when I'm visiting it. I hate it when I'm trying to live in it. L.A. is just so ...
More About: Here , Weed , There , Tweed

also!
2006-12-02 15:35:01
Wow... three posts in one day! Don't you feel lucky.Don't answer that.I keep forgetting to say this, so I need to do it now. I've now found a way to put music on my page. Can you hear it? If it's not automatic, go all the way to the bottom of this page and click play. Chad Sexton (the rock-your-socks-clean-off drummer from 311 - who, by the way, just added me as a "friend" on myspace - yes, I'm a dweeb), has me HOOKED on this song. The first day I heard it, I listened to it on constant replay... all... day... long.So have a listen. And please. See that little button at the bottom of this post that says "0 Comments"? CLICK IT! COMMENT! Let me know if the music works. If not, I've gotta make some changes.Ok, now I'm serious. I'm signing off. Hugs and kisses and all that yummy stuff. :)

also....
2006-12-02 15:35:01
I just talked to Dean for a while, and he mentioned Lisa Lampanelli, who I'm ashamed to admit I've never seen before. So I youtube'd her, and looked at 4 or 5 of her stand-up videos.He was right; she is absolutely hilarious. So I'm sharing it with you all here. (But be warned, family members and other viewers not so crazy about insane amounts of cursing, there's a LOT of offensive stuff in it. Still... it's effin' hysterical).

instant karma's gonna get you
2006-12-02 15:35:01
UGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.You know those days when you feel like telling the entire world to FUCK OFF?Yep, dis be one of 'em. I'm fucking screwed... in more ways than one, (though not in that way, unfortunately). And on top of being screwed, I'm seriously heated because I can hear my family's voices in my head. "What are you doing, Bonni? Why do you have to be so difficult? Why can't you just come home and live a normal life like the rest of us? You know you're not gonna make it."For the first time, I'm scared shitless and all I can seem to do is hate everyone for it. I really need to sit down and write some stuff out. Rid myself of this fear and this anger cuz they're the only things debilitating me. I need to talk to Robyn, or someone who knows what they're talking about where this situation is concerned. I'm hating being away from home right now... but I know the only reason I'm hating it is cuz it's just so easy there. I have to do this... but go...
More About: Karma , Gonna , Arma

take it back, take it wayyyyyyyyyyy back
2006-12-02 15:35:01
Ok, confession time. I have been up all. damn. night.Why? Because I called Stephaun out of the blue at about 8:00 last night, and we talked about how many people were on myspace that we hadn't seen in ages, and how pissed off he was that I deleted my page without emailing him my number so we could keep in touch, and that it's probably the same case with a lot of people from high school. So what did I do? *Sigh* I set up yet another myspace page. And since then have been IM'ing all night with some of the people I found.There's one thing myspace it's good for, though...You know that one person in junior high/high school that just would not stop picking on you no matter what approach you tried to take with them? The one that found every single thing you did amusing and relentlessly made fun of you?This is why I love MySpace. That person now looks like this. [Edited Out - sorry y'all]. Ah, revenge is sweet.I'll probably be deleting this soon, cuz I just might want to put a li...
More About: Take , Back

you've already won me over, in spite of me
2006-12-02 15:35:01
How does someone you haven't seen in two years, and haven't been... ahem... intimate with in at least 7(?) years still make you weak in the knees? Sigh. This isn't good.So today I'm feeling 150% better. I couldn't speak this morning... and you should've heard me trying to sing along with Andrea. I sounded like a dying cat in heat. But now I'm almost all better! The sniffles are still here, but I can deal with them. Thank g-o-o-d-ness. This week has to be a long week. There's a lot I need to do, and I think I made a lot of plans that I'd better write down, lest I forget.Tomorrow Lex and I are going to Soho or somewhere around there. It's been way too long. She just moved here from Hawai'i (why, I don't know!), and now we'll be able to see each other a lot more often. We just got through having a very long discussion about old Polyzz days, and Jaycob [shudder], and other hilarious stuff. I can't tell you how glad I am that I can actually laugh at all that stuff now. It...
More About: Read , Over , Ready , Spit

there's never a right time to...
2006-12-02 15:35:01
Hi y'all.So... I'm in a much better mood... I no longer feel like ripping my arm off and throwing it at someone. I got some answers, a lot was worked out, a lot has changed and a lot has happened. But I think I'm gonna lay off of the blog. Not quite sure. Right now, I don't see myself writing here, as I have plans for another blog elsewhere for all of the nosey family to see (that, and I still have my LiveJournal for all my daily nonsense that's only seen by those I trust), but I have a tendency to say one thing and change my mind a week later... so we'll see.I forgot why I was writing in here. Uh...I guess I thought I should write a not-so-emotionally-driven sayonara post....and I just spent the past 10 minutes staring at the screen, not knowing what to write. So I think I'll try not talking too much for once and leave it at that. Adios, everyone!
More About: Time , Here , Ever , Never

All The Givers Shall Receive
2005-12-18 06:10:00
Tonight we went to the end of the year chapter meeting @ LAFC, and it was packed!I gave my experience as well, and I was nervous beyond belief. I'm really surprised no one else could tell. Guess this cold I have came in handy. The response I got was overwhelming... people actually came up to me afterwards and told me how inspiring the story was. I honestly thought I screwed up, but I guess I did get my point across. I'm happy I went. I'm pretty pissed that I didn't get to go to the Christmas party, though. I really wanted to see everyone. Maybe they'll have a New Years thing.So right before we went tonight, my mom told me she'd heard from Nonna. She's not doing well, health-wise. Apparently Aunt Ang & her husband are too busy to take care of her, and she can't stand all the smoke in the house. She was gonna move to the east coast w/ Auntie N, but now she just can't travel that far... and of course, she refuses to fly. So she had a request for me. She wants to buy a hous...
More About: The G