La Bella Noire's Ramblings

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Overnight Celebrity
2007-06-27 14:47:00
Yesterday afternoon, I was at the gas station and some young chick--about 16 years old--ran up to me and said, "Are you really La Bella Noire?" I was taken for a loop, but told her I was and she got all excited. "I hope your toes are better and I hope your job isn't so ghetto anymore", she said. I asked her where she knew me from and she said she saw my picture on one of my friend's Fac.e.book albums, then tracked me down to my blog from there.I didn't know if I should be flattered or scared for my life. I know I've recognized people that I thought I saw online, but I never went up to them and invaded their personal bubble. And I've never staked someone out from a site like Mys.p.ace or F.ac.e.book to their blog and been proud of it. D said I should take down my pics and close my F.ac.ebook account because of this incident, but I'm not about to rearrange my life because of some kid. But now I wonder, have any of yall ever run into someone from the internet? I don't mean someo...
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They Call Me Mrs. Military
2007-06-26 03:39:00
So this weekend was lots of fun, and that's probably why I'm left with some kind of head cold. Ehh, well I left work early to rest, so I can't complain too much. Friday I went to my stepsister's house for my stepnephew's going away party. He's leaving for a college summer program, and won't be back for any real length of time before he starts his freshman year. Do the damn thing boy!! I'm so proud of him, it seems like only a few years ago he was graduating from 4th grade. I'm starting to feel old cuz all of my stepnieces and nephews are either graduating or getting married (a few of them are my age, since most of my step siblings are old enough to be my parents, but I digress). A few of his friends actually tried to holla at me. I guess I'm kinda flattered that a whole rack of 17- and 18-year olds think I've got it. One of them even went the "I can treat you better than your man" route. He was like, "I gotta car and I stay in the basement so it's like my own apartment"....
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How come...?
2007-06-22 16:11:00
Because it's Friday and I'm lazy, here are some of the (stupid) questions on my mind...-How come tourists forget that not all of us are on vacation? We live and work here dammit, get out of the way. NO I don't want to take your picture in front of the Metro sign.-How come management gets all tight lipped when they have to fire someone on your team, but the next week they're talkin all kinds of shit about that person. Unprofessional maybe?-How come I saw a lady wearing a suit pushing a stroller this morning but there was no baby inside--just a case of Heineken? And she was smoking a Black n' Mild. Hmmmm-How come one of my credit cards expired on May 31 and I still haven't received the new one. And every time I call, the people say "it's on it's way". I just called, and they're deactivating the one that was on it's way and sending me a new one overnight with delivery confirmation. It's a shame I had to get almost ign'ant to get some decent service-How come I keep hearing M...

Similac on your breath...
2007-06-21 15:40:00
This morning on my way to work I had a few extra minutes, so I stopped to get a smoothie and a muffin. Normally I wouldn't stop at this place because a lot of construction workers tend to congregate there, and their trucks take up too much of the pitifully small parking lot. But whatever--I had time, so I took the chance.I couldn't even get in the door before I heard, "Yeah baby! You look good, probably still drinking from your mama's bosom!"So I looked behind me and of course it was Willie. You all know Willie...the type of man who just looks like he has a closet full of Member's Only jackets and a few leisure suits. He looks like he can fry the hell out of some catfish and make a mean pulled pork BBQ sandwich. He wears shorts with dress socks and sandals and has a random assortment of gold chains. He might even have a part cut into his high top fade. Yeah...that guy.I tried like hell to ignore him, and kept going toward the counter. He found some way to get all behind me and I...
More About: Breath , Mila , Brea

Gracious
2007-06-20 15:07:00
With all the stuff I've been trying to deal with the last few weeks concerning my parents, especially the last few days, I've been less than enjoyable to be around. I don't know how D has managed to deal with me, but he's done a great job...Hunny,Thank you so much for being there with me as I go through this hard time. I'm sure there are plenty of other things you'd rather be doing than wiping tears from my eyes and hugging me when I'm shaking like a leaf from crying so hard. Thank you so much for assuring me that I'm still beautiful through tears and snot and kleenex. Thank you for continuing to hold me up when I feel like I can't take much more. Thank you for being willing to fight through all of this with me, and for allowing some of this to fall on your shoulders because you know mine are getting weak. Thank you for making your arms the safest, most comfortable place in the world. You could very easily judge me and consider me less than, because you know exactly who's ...

Fathers, Daughters, and Unknowns
2007-06-19 03:42:00
Today, the day after the cards and ties and hugs have been exchanged, I'm still left feeling a little empty. Fath er's Day is now a difficult holiday for me to be jubilant about because now there are more questions than answers. When I was born, I had a father. Just one. As shitty as he was to me, he was my father and later on became the representation of what a man isn't supposed to be. Every Father's Day, I'd make him a construction paper card with all the love in the world, even though he showed much less than that love back to me. He usually wasn't around to get the cards, but my mom would take them and promise me that he'd get them. It wasn't until about 3 years ago that I found her collection of cards that she stashed away. The cards all had "Return to Sender" marked on them. At least she tried.Then my mom got remarried. My stepfather was and still is everything my father could never be. I understand now the meaning of a daddy's girl. That's me. He's my daddy, and ma...
More About: Fathers , Daughter , Daughters , Unknowns

Father's Day...
2007-06-18 04:00:00
Happy Fath er's Day to all the dads (and moms who have to be dad). I have a lot on my mind about fathers and daughters, but I don't have it in me to let it all out yet, so pardon the short post. I'll get back to it tomorrow, be blessed.
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Somebody's Watchin Me....
2007-06-12 15:42:00
I think I've got a cyber stalker, and it's someone I kinda know. This is uncharacteristic of me, but...***PLEASE BACK THE FUCK UP!!***Dear Stalker,I love that people stop by this here blog and read about the mess that goes on in my life and the stuff I think about. But I don't like the fact that I've had limited real-world contact with you, yet you think you really know me and the stuff that goes on in my life cuz you read this blog. I know you're watching me like a hawk to see if I say or do something out of line on this blog so you can try to use that ish against me and gain some ground on me. I hope that's not the case, and I want you to prove me wrong. I have a whole lot I could say about this, but I'mma keep my mouf shut cuz I'm better than that. But I feel your eyes on me. Heh.Ok, now that I've gotten that off my chest, I have been watching you. In your cars that is. I have a pretty long commute every day, and I see people doing the nastiest and stupidest shit in thei...
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The Ex-Games
2007-06-11 16:27:00
On Saturday, D and I went shopping (well, he and his boy did the man thing and went to the DuClaw bar at Arundel Mills while me and his boy's fiancée did the shopping) and to his neice's high school graduation party. On the way to the party, we stopped to get gas. Of course, who do we see but my ex. I really didn't think anything of it, figured I'd say hey and keep it moving. Which is exactly what happened, except for him giving me that wink as we were leaving. I knew he was trying to be up to no good.We got home around 1AM, and I checked my email and of course Ex-Factor had clogged up my inbox. He sent me 4 e-cards all talkin about he's sorry and wants to give things another chance, blah blah blah. I guess his wifey caught the same clue I did and left his ass in the dust. Needless to say, I was not amused, didn't find it cute, and was not trying to make amends with him. I showed D the emails and cards and he busted out laughing, pointing out the fact that ex-factor misspelled...
More About: Games , X-Games , Ames

Don't Be Crude...
2007-06-08 17:32:00
...Cuz I would never be that crude to yooouuu!Sorry, I know those aren't the real words to the song, but I got carried away. I'm fully expecting Bobby Brown to come chase after me for royalties in a crack induced stupor. Riiiiight.Anyway, Ladies, lemme holla at'chall for a minute. The whole reason I'm singin 'bout some don't be crude is because of, how shall I put this...your restroom etiquette. Look, we're all grown here, so I'mma just keep it real.-Flush the gotdamned toilet when you're done. Are you really that lazy? Did you actually forget to do this as you walked away??-You know that cutesy pie lil' plaque you have over your bathroom at home (which applies to the men in your home) that says "If you sprinkle when you tinkle, please be neat and wipe the seat"? Well, if you are a public restroom "squatter" (you know what I mean)then this applies to you as well.-"It's the first of the month...so cash yo' checks and get up...." Sorry, carried away with the songs again. B...
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More Conversations With La Bella Mama
2007-06-07 15:23:00
Now that I live with D, my mother felt the need to pass on some nuggets of wisdom to me last night. Apparently these are secrets known by all wives and live in girlfriends the world over, and she felt that I'm now in a place to know this information. My mother is an absolute nut, she really needs her own reality show or something.Me: "Mom, I love him dearly, but he has some habits I just can't stand. Uggggg! The shirts!"Mom: "Just leaves 'em on the floor, right? And has a few that he wears ALL the time, but you hate and think the rest of the world hates just as much?"Me: "Ohmygod. Yup. You have the same problem?"Mom: "Every married woman or live in girlfriend has or has had this issue. Hmmm, you know what you do right? Damn, I shouldn't be telling you this. I really shouldn't."Me: "You can't not tell me now!"Mom: "Okay...well....alright. Now don't get too happy with this but, every once in a blue moon, take one of the shirts you HATE and just hide it. Does he go in your car t...
More About: Mama , Bella , Ella , Conversation

Wednesday Whining
2007-06-06 16:31:00
Just because I feel like whining this morning...-Ok, so why do all the cute shoes wait until my toes/feet are out of commission to show up?! I want to go shoe shopping this weekend, hopefully my foot will be back to a normal size by Saturday.-I'm not comfortable taking diet advice from a 400 lb. woman. I'm a non-small girl, so I'm allowed to say that. This office woman is forever saying ish like, "when I was small, I didn't use Equal or Splenda, I ate regular sugar so you should too" or "you should eat more leafy veggies because they have iron". Look, I got this weight loss thing under control. Why is she giving advice when she's sitting there eating Chipotle and has gained 60 lbs in the last year? And why aren't you small now? Uggh!-I'm really tired of hearing about the guy with TB who flew on the planes to and from Europe. What he did is already done, there is no need for the squabbling about it now. Move forward and get the situation dealt with.-Why, black women, whyyyyyy?...
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Only Me
2007-06-05 16:13:00
I never knew that shoes could be so dangerous, especially once they're on your feet. This morning, I'm sitting up here with three broken toes and a slightly bruised ego. See, yesterday I thought I was too cute and put on some peep toe wedges and of course, like a fool, decided that I needed to take a walk at lunch time. I don't know why it did not occur to me that walking + wedges may = problems. But of course, I fell off of my right shoe, and landed flat on my face, but I managed to get my foot caught up in the shoe and injured my toes. I was quick to get back up and keep walking, cuz you know how it is--gotta spring back up after you trip and/or fall so it looks like you didn't hurt yourself, or like you really meant to do that. Gotta maintain that shred of dignity right. But lemme telll yoooou, my toes were swelling all crazy, and I was definitely doing that "my foot hurts like hell, but I'm trying to maintain my cute" walk. I was afraid to take my shoe off for the rest of t...

Baby Shower for a Baby
2007-06-04 17:05:00
So I ended up going to the baby shower for my friend's little sister on Friday. All I can say is that I felt like I was part of a twisted mix of sweet sixteen, debutante ball, tea party, Maury Show, and baby shower. A apologized to me before, during, and after the whole mess for having such a jacked up situation in her family. I've seen people in less-than-triumphant moments in their lives, but this just made my head hurt. A and I met in college, and I knew she had a little sister, but she never really got into the mess that is that poor girl's life, and for good reason I see now.When A and I got there, I was instructed to put on a pair of long white gloves and told to sit at the table and get acquainted with the other guests while A helped her sister get ready. We drank tea and ate pettifours like we were at some high class place, but mind you we were in a condo in Bowie. Nothing fancy, and a buch of chicks were sitting there in dressy-casual wear (i.e. jeans with a cute top or ...
More About: Baby , Howe , Shower

TGIF
2007-06-01 15:24:00
I am too ready for this weekend. I worked all of four days and feel like I need another week off. It's always something about the week after a holiday that makes me soooo tired. I thought I hit the snooze button this morning, but instead turned the alarm off in my sleepy stupor, then slept for another 30 minutes. Needless to say I was running like a fugitive slave when I finally did get out of bed. That's what I get for staying up and watching the game go into double OT. Hmmph.I'm supposed to be going to a baby shower for my friend's little sister tonight, but I really don't know if I want to go. I know that sounds bad, but I dunno. I have the gift all ready for her, but I feel awkward going to a shower for a 16 year old who has no idea who the baby's father is. My girl doesn't really want to be a part of it either, that's why she roped me into going with her, lol. I guess I'll be driving the getaway car if things get crazy.My (step) niece turned 21 yesterday, so she wants ...

Friends Forever Never Forever
2007-05-31 15:26:00
It's difficult when you get to the realization that it's time to cut certain people out of your life for good. I've always been the person to give second and third chances when they weren't warranted, because I try so hard to see that little bit of good that's in everyone. I'm not ignorant though; I realize that that little bit of good really doesn't mean much if it's not used. Sometimes we just grow apart, but it's so painful realizing that you've grown so far apart, taking completely different paths, when you spent most of your life growing (up) together.Some of us hold our friends closer than we do our families, and usually for good reason. My now-former best friend was a part of my family. We became friends in the sandbox 20 years ago this past February. Our parents coordinated vacations, we went to summer camp together, and we shared stories of first kisses, first dates, bad fashion, bad boyfriends, "the first time", promises to be in each other's weddings, and every...
More About: Friends , Forever , Ends , Fore

Keepin it Real?
2007-05-30 15:42:00
I got an email yesterday from an old friend/associate (we've gone down differing paths over the years, but still remain fairly close), and in the footer of the email, she had some random quote from Ghandi and "Keep It Real ". I was sort of shocked to see that in the footer because over the years and currently, she makes it her responsibility to follow the latest trends to a T and to try her damndest to keep up with the money makers and the Joneses (on a teacher's salary), even though she admits to not liking half of the things she's purchased, etc.Then I got to thinking about all the rappers and media people forever drilling "Keep It Real" or some version thereof into the minds of the masses, but at the same time trying to harangue everyone into buying their movie, CD, or whatever have you. Last time I checked, keeping it real involves me being comfortable in my own skin, liking what I like, being who I want to be, and doing what I want to do unashamedly. It doesn't require being...

What I learned on my (almost) summer vacay...
2007-05-29 16:42:00
I hope everyone had a wonderful, blessed holiday weekend. I had such a good time being away from the plantation doing a whole lot of nothing but eating and chilling, and some catching up with my girls from back home who came through on Friday night before we left for Philly. But I did manage to learn a few things during my travels with Hunny...-Road trips with men are different:We went from Maryland to Philly--a straight shot up I-95 and still managed to get lost. I told Hunny I'd drive through Delaware so we didn't end up going across the Delaware Memorial Bridge and onto the Jersey Turnpike, but he said his military navigation skills were on point so I should trust him. (This is always his standard reasoning, lol!) *Ahem*. *Cough*. Umm, apparently he didn't cover sign reading skills in his training, cuz we ended up crossing the bridge and taking some crazy azz alternate route across the gottdamned Jersey Turnplike. Two hours later, I saw the same group of 5 cows for the third t...
More About: Summer , Learn , Learned

Vacation's All I Ever Wanted....
2007-05-25 14:54:00
Sorry for not posting this week, but I'm enjoying my much needed vacation. I haven't done much all week except for eat, sleep, and play. Today we're headed for Philly to see some family and chill, and we might take a run around Hershey Park depending on the traffic and what we feel like doing. Hunny and I are both too done with the gas prices around the urrea, especially him, since he decided to up and buy a new car with a big azz Hemi engine last week. Of course though, he wants to show his new toy off, so we're on the road with the gas guzzling beast, lol.I was hurting for some time off from that place I call a job, and I have begun searching for something better and *ahem* well...better. I absolutely hate the place--the people moreso than the place, and I've already developed two NASTY knock-me-out-for-two-days migraines, and I can't keep going like that. So one of my girls is trying to hook me up with a fab position with the company she works with. Normally I wouldn't be ...
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Friday Flashback
2007-05-18 16:14:00
I woke up with this in my head this morning, it's KRS-One "Step Into a World":Happy Frida y and have a good weekend!
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Ask Me
2007-05-17 19:10:00
I thought I'd share parts of some of the emails (and my responses) that I've gotten from people who read my blog...Hi Ms. La Bella, are you related to Patti? Please let me know cos if you are I want you to sign an autograph okUmm. No. I'm not related to Patti. But I really want to know why you'd want an autograph from a celebrity's relative. That's really borderline.I miss reading about your run ins with sketchy men. Do they still happen often?I always attract sketchball men in the grocery store, at the gym, at the mall--damn near everywhere I go. That's just the way it is. I've been collecting stories and pictures to share.How has it been living with Hunny so far?Both of us are still alive and we haven't broken up. That's all I have to say about that. *kidding, we're actually doing just fine*You really should stop talking about your co-workers on your blog. I'm sure they are nice people. It's really not nice to talk about people. That's probably why they talk about yo...

Tuesday Mind Mashup
2007-05-14 22:47:00
Hope everyone had a beautiful weekend and had a great Mothers Day. It was nice going to NY to see my mom, but that drive...ugh. She loved her gift, but was more excited about the fact that Hunny and I went to see her--I haven't been back home since Christmas. But I'm back to reality, and I'm sitting at work with the randomness on my mind:-Do moms go to work the day after Mothers Day and compare gifts or lie about what they got? "Girrrrrlll, my son got me a trip to Antarctica to see da penguins!" LOL-Why do people always tilt their head to the side in a picture? Remember in school on picture day the photographer would always have you tilt your head in some unnatural feeling way, but it was really cuz your head was leaning so you had to compensate to make it look straight?-It seems like the grown ass men who still live with their mamas (I mean over the age of 27) have the most evil mothers/grandmothers!-It's not smart to wear thin white linen pants with white panties with big azz...
More About: Mind , Tuesday , Mashup , Mash

Happy Moms Day
2007-05-11 17:04:00
I had this long post written about my mama and just how much she means to me, but somehow I managed to delete all of it. So rather than try to re-create it, I'll keep it simple and say that my mom has become my best friend over the years. I did some stuff in my teens that warranted her ending my life, but she stuck through it and made sure we ended up okay. She sacrificed so much without complaint to raise my brother and I, and I can only hope that when I produce some offspring of my own I'm able to handle things with the same kind of grace, dignity,humour, and humility. Yeah, I'm a mama's girl and I ain't shamed, lol!Hunny and I are going up to NY tonight to see her and surprise her with tickets to see "The Color Purple" and "Radio Golf" (the new August Wilson play) on Broadway. We're coming back down here on Sunday extra-early AM to surprise his mom with the same gifts. We got the tickets so the moms can go to the shows together. Hopefully we can manage to squeeze some slee...
More About: Happy , Moms , S Day

The Birds and Rats
2007-05-10 14:50:00
They're everywhere. Trying to make my life miserable. Squawking at every given moment, getting in the way of things. Home, work, I seem to run into them almost anywhere I go. No, I don't mean the winged, feathered kind either. I'm talking about the worst bunch--The Ghetto Bird s .Some of them really aren't that bad--good girls who just haven't been taught any better, so they follow what the other birds tell them to do rather than follow their own minds.However, I work with a few that are not good girls gone bird. These chicks are on some other mess, and I am really left wondering how they got hired, and what I did to deserve the punishment of working with them. Yeah, they have typical ghetto bird and hood rat tendencies like the extra loud gum popping, unnecessary cussin, busted weave wearing, and having curved nails the length of a yardstick. Not to mention the outfits that all come from the $10 store. (and no, I don't have a problem with the $10 store...goodness knows I've go...
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I'm Baaaack
2007-05-08 14:34:00
I'm back to regularly scheduled life now. Things with the old lease office are going better than I expected. I'm not going to be sued, just being held responsible for two months rent for breaking the lease, which is good for me. I will be taking them to court though for trying to make me live in those conditions, and I've got my lawyer, doctors notes, copies of documents from the health dept, and LOTS of pictures, so I am prepared if things go way wrong.Anyhoo, living with Hunny's been good so far. I'm still trying to get my stuff settled in, but we're getting along fine and are planning a "Tasha just moved in" housewarming party, lol. So nothing much went on this weekend, other than moving and sorting.Work is going alright so far, but I've got the sketchy people list already. I'm watching them like they stole something because their stories just don't add up right. Of course I've got things to say about them, but I'll wait a few more days so I can try to figure them out ...

Unfabulousness
2007-05-03 04:19:00
Life just got extra damn unfabulous. I'm moving in with Hunny at the end of this week, which in itself is great, but SO not on my timeline. This decision was made on Monday, so I have an entire apartment to sort and move in 5 MFin days. See, the ceiling literally caved in over my bed and in my bathroom, so the place is uninhabitable. Ceiling parts fell on me in my MFin sleep!! According to the lease office, this is no big fuggin deal--they say it's still livable in there, and I should give them a few days to fix the problem. And oh, did I mention, when I went to take a shower yesterday morning, there was a MUSHROOM growing out of the fuggin drain?! Moldy shit was spewing the fugg out of the drain like it's normal. I'm hellaciously allergic to mold, so that's completely unacceptable. I'm not Super Mario or Luigi--collecting toadstool mushroom princesses is some shit I should only do on a gotdamned video game!So I'm doing something I would normally never do, and chunking the de...
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The Questions...
2007-05-01 19:22:00
I'm struggling today yall, not much in this world is making sense. I'm feeling like I am caught in some mind/space/time screw up, and I can't figure up from down. I don't feel like me, and nothing seems right at all. I'm so tempted to just want to sleep it off, but I realize that I've been avoiding my numerous problems that way as of late. I've got questions and stuff and life on my mind...Why am I so scared of dealing with the decision I had to make? No amount of googling the topic can prepare me. I know it was for the bestI wish I could gather up the strength to return my father's phone call. I never had a problem with it beforeI'm feeling so vulnerable lately, and I'm not taking criticism well. My feelings were actually hurt when I heard one of my new co-workers talking shit about me. That's new tooSince I woke up this morning, I've had the urge to cry about eight different timesWhy do I feel useless even though I'm capable of contributing so muchEveryone says I seem...
More About: Questions , Quest

Going to the chapel
2007-05-01 03:49:00
I had a disturbing conversation with one of my co-workers today. She told me she's desperately trying to find a man so she can get married. When I asked her why she's so pressed to be married, she told me it's because she's a virgin and she wants to have sex. She mentioned nothing about wanting to fall in love and be with her husband for the rest of her days. Nothing about the vows, but everything about the dress, the gifts, and the sex on the first night. When I pressed her more, she actually said she'd probably divorce then she'd be free to have sex with whomever she wanted with no strings attached.I have no idea why people feel so comfortable telling me all their business, but I guess that's just the way of my world. But her comments got me thinking about all those girls that were featured in the news stories about Chastity Balls, where they signed contracts with their daddies stating that they'd wait until marriage to do the dirty. I have to wonder, with the divorce rate...
More About: Chapel , Going , Goin , Apel

Cart Craptasticness
2007-04-29 21:34:00
I got back not too long ago from my weekly errand running, and of course that involved a run to Targét to pick up some necessities for home. I normally wait to go there in the evenings to avoid the Sunday errand runners with kids in tow and the people who can't park their ginormous SUVs, but I figured since I was in the area, I'd stop.I don't know if today is national cart kiss my azz day or what, but after being in there, I need a drink. Maybe I'm wrong for this, but I navigate the aisles like I do the road...I let people coming toward me go past before I make a left into the aisle, etc. Most people seem to do the same, or are at least courteous with their carts.Normally, if I say "pardon me" or something, the person blocking the aisle will move. But noooo, we're too good to move. It seemed like every aisle I went in, there was someone blocking and I uttered my pardons and not one person moved. I had to push one lady's cart out of my way and I apologized as I did it, but she ...
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I value being alive...
2007-04-27 02:01:00
I really enjoy being alive, really I do. However, today you may have thought otherwise. One of my girls from NYC moved down here a few months back, and she didn't have a driver's license--just not a necessity when you have 24 hour mass transit. She got her learner's permit about 2 months ago, and has been taking driving lessons. This evening, she asked me to go driving with her. I figured it would be no big deal, seeing as we were taking her mom's car (I wasn't about to let her drive my baby), and she's been in driving school.Umm, absolutely wrong. I drove out to a fairly rural area where there is very little traffic, then let her take the wheel. We were doing fine, going along a quiet straightaway, but then we came to a stoplight and I told her to make a left. There was oncoming traffic on the other side of the light. When it turned green, this fool decided to just dart out and make her turn in front of the oncoming traffic. I heard the WORST combination of screeching tires a...
More About: Value , Bein , Being , Alive