La Bella Noire's Ramblings

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Articles: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

It made me go hmmm...
2007-04-25 01:59:00
The first two days at my new job are over, and while I couldn't be happier about the position, I'm convinced that I signed up to be the ringmaster for a three ring circus and the moderator for Romper Room. The people who I directly work with seem to be fabulous people--everyone's been helpful and welcoming. Well, except for the uber-ghetto broads; but they're pretty much off in a corner anyway, so no one really hears from them except for the occasional "Ohmygoodnes, noyoudidn't!!" or crazy loud gum pop. Once I set foot outside of my assigned segment of cubicles, all hell breaks loose however. Never in my life have I seen so much inter-office flirting and f%*#ing, with people just spilling their business all over the place. I witnessed an arguement at lunch between two co workers who are screwing but both cheating on their significant others. Not even two hours later while I was on my vending machine Twizzlers run, I saw the same two outside holding hands all kissy faced. Welcom...
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Weekend Rewind
2007-04-23 04:24:00
I've been MIA recently because I went up to NYC for my great aunt's 90th birthday. It's always fun to get together with the fam for a mini reunion (said with some sarcasm). I found out that a bunch of my cousins live literally right up the street from me here in the Urrea, so we'll be hooking up for a night out soon. I also had a chance to see some old family photos from 1903. That was definitely special to see who we come from.Of course, there were the people who haven't seen me since I was about 4 years old. "Ohmygoodness, I haven't seen you since you were knee high to a grasshopper" and lots of cheek pinching. They seem to forget that in 20+ years, I grew into a woman and don't appreciate being passed around like a Cabbage Patch Kid. They also seem to have forgotten that I deal with sketchy men trying to holla all the time, so they felt the need to point out each and every one to me. "Oooooh, he was loooooking at you!! He must liiiiike you. OOOOOOOOOOOOhhhhhh". Damn yall,...
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Big Mama Where Art Thou...
2007-04-16 07:24:00
Pardon if all of this sounds a bit convoluted, but I'm still trying to form concrete words for my fluid thoughts.In the wake of all the Imus brouhaha, I'm left wondering about dem hoes. I don't mean the gifted athletes that idiot was referring to, but the ones we see in videos and at the club and in line at the check cashing spot and on TV pretending to be in "Charm School". I've already made clear that I'm disgusted by how women are denigrated in videos and in rap-type (I say rap-type, cuz that shit is NOT rap. Rap is what came out of the Bronx around '79, but I digress) lyrics. It's absolutely disgusting, but I have to take a few steps back and think about the fact that they are singing about real women. And some of those real women actually appreciate, and resemble those lyrics. There are women who find that stuff appealing, who actually sign up to shake their asses in videos, who want to be tied to Snoop's leash, who enjoy being featured in Nelly's "Tip Drill" video.We ...
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Non Qualifiers Vol. 2
2007-04-16 04:47:00
Mr. Too Damn Frugal...Him and I were high school sweethearts or something like that. We knew each other growing up, went to the same church and all, and we went to high school together--well I was at the girls' school and he was across the street at the boys' school (we had some co-ed classes in high school, so don't think I suffered too bad). We didn't actually get together until after he graduated though, but I was still a junior.But anyway, I understand for college students life is tough, but my boy had a job in the development office (which was NOT work study) so he made grown people's money. He was far from broke. I had a part time job too, so we were living cool. I had a car, he had a car...we were living hood fabulous.I thought I was IT, because in high school all the girls wanted him, and I had him. He would come home from college most weekends to visit and we'd go out. When we first hooked up, I was working at a movie theater, so our dates usually involved my free ent...

Non-Qualifiers Vol. 1
2007-04-13 09:45:00
I was talking to my cradle to the grave best friend earlier and we got talking about our exes, so I decided to create a series of posts dedicated to the former Mr. La Bella Noires. I would post their pictures, but I just can't be bothered with all of the scanning and photoshopping. Ehh well. I'll be posting more of them over the next few weeks.First up, Mr. I'm too sexy for my car...I met this dude not long after I moved to the Urrea, and at first all seemed well. Then I met his car. Mr. I'm too sexy is one of those men that when you look at him you find yourself physically attracted to him, but without logical explanation cuz he really isn't hot. He's a big looks like he should always be sweaty linebacker type guy with some questionable facial hair and an unidentifiable hairline. Thank the stars above he keeps his head shaved.He thinks he is one of the fast and the furious, driving one of those TINY little Honda Civic Si hatchbacks even though he can barely fit. He thinks he...

Back in Business
2007-04-13 07:12:00
Yesterday, after getting that really jacked up news about my job and tossing my resume around like a crazy woman, I remembered that key phrase ingrained in my mind during undergrad--NET-friggin-WORK. I called up an old employer from NY, knowing that they have some outlets and connections in this area. In all of about an hour or two of conversations with HR, my old supervisor, and the hiring manager here, I found myself back on their payroll with state-to-state transfer complete. This was a company I did a modified internship with, but decided not to go full time with after graduation. I always liked the company, but wanted to get my feet wet with other companies before I made the move to the Urrea. Lucky me, cuz that is definitely NOT standard protocol for a company that daggone big.They were more than happy to immediately welcome me back to the company, and my old supervisor basically gave the hiring manager here instructions to hire me post-haste because she remembered how good of...
More About: Business , Back , Ness , Sine

Yowza!
2007-04-11 17:24:00
Damn, talk about bad news. I was peeking through the newspaper today and saw an ad for the position I was just hired for, and not even 30 minutes later I got a call stating that the company has to renig my offer due to budget constraints. They would have to pay me so much less that it would be worthless for me to take the job, so they're looking for *ahem* less qualified candidates who would be willing to accept less money.So what is a chick to do?? They'd given me the offer, so naturally I quit my old job. Common sense...call the old place and try to chat up getting my old position back. Not so fast, they already have a new candidate set to start making *surprise* less money.Oh my stars! So I'm back in Monster's arse throwing my resume around like confetti. Thank God the bills for the month are paid and Hunny's willing to help me out for a lil while. But seriously, this ain't cute. I've never been in this kind of position before, and I know my worth in the job market so I wo...

Tasha Takes on...
2007-04-10 16:05:00
...The Imus Factor.I'm not even going to go into what happened on Mr. Imus' show, because every possible news/newsblog/lateshow outlet has done that for me. But it seems like with all of the squawking going on, we're not really addressing the issue(s) completely. Here's my $.02. I know most of the black community doesn't agree with me, but oh well...Everybody's making all this noise about how what Don Imus said was so racist. Ok, yeah I'll agree there, nappy.headed.hoes does equate to racist innuendo. But he would never have known what a nappy headed hoe is or how to use the terminology if he hadn't heard it from one of US. Yeah, I said it. We do need to take responsibility for some of this. Of course the man should have known better than to spew some stupidity like that on the air, but those words would never have entered his lexicon if some ignorant sounding black person hadn't uttered them in his presence.I'm offended and appalled by the comments, as we all should be. H...
More About: Tasha , Asha

Monday Mash-Up
2007-04-09 19:22:00
The randomness for this Monday ...Uggghh, I think I'm officially too old to listen to the music on the radio that the DJs refer to as hip-hop. Maybe we as the listeners are being punked by the current breed of artists out there. The songs kind of meld together in my brain and I get something like this: "Put my 'Chicken noodle soup and a soda on the side' in the 'Icebox where my heart used to be'. 'My lipgloss is poppin and my lipgloss is cool' because 'She's fine too, but I want You'. 'If you were my B-U-D-D-Y', then I'd be able to say 'This is why I'm hot'. I'd 'Toot that thang up...Pop, Lock, and Drop' but I'm too busy trying to act 'Like a Boy'.I really think in-person customer service is dead. Hunny and I went car shopping over the weekend and we stopped at one dealership to test drive a new truck. The sales lady we got was the most ghetto-ass horrible chick EVER!! We walked up to a Tahoe and she said "This is a Tahoe, it's blue". Nothing at all about the e...
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Happy Easter
2007-04-08 17:15:00
It's Easter Sunday, and the first in my life that I haven't been at home with my family. My parent are in Jamaica for a funeral, so I couldn't go to NY to be with them, and although I could go have dinner with my brother or any of my other family, I know it wouldn't be the same so I'm not. I'm going to have dinner with Hunny's family, and I'm kinda looking forward to the blank stares that I know I will be receiving from a few of the people that will be there (mostly his dad's side of the family).It's kinda hard being away from my mom at Easter, since this is a hard holiday for the both of us. This was one of the last times we saw her mom healthy before she passed away, so we always sit and reminisce. There's a small part of me that hates this holiday now because we're celebrating Jesus being resurrected, but the same couldn't happen for my gramma. Not three days later, not three years later. *sigh*For five years before I moved here, I was the Easter Bunny incarnate. My ...
More About: Happy , Aster

You Must Not Know Bout Me
2007-04-05 13:47:00
Over the last week or so, I've gotten a whole bunch of emails from people who read this blog (leave comments, it helps me figure out who you are, mmmk)who are jumping down my throat for the extra randomness of my posts lately, or are trying to tell me that what I write about is too young or too old, or telling me that I need to be more lucid with my writing, or hurling some personal insult, or my personal favorite trying to tell me what I'm about and who I really am on the inside. I've got thick skin, this really doesn't bother me, but I'm honestly getting tired of seeing the emails and I'm in rare form today, so allow me...I write what I want when I want. I don't care if you don't like it. If you're such a non-fan, please help yourself to the X at the top right corner of this window. I don't write to make you happy, I write because I can and because it makes me happy. I don't sit at my computer and ponder over my words to make them amenable to the goings on in your brain...
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Ladybugs
2007-04-04 05:54:00
Sometimes little children can be so wise.I went to visit one of my cousins today, and while I was there she asked me if I would watch her six year old daughter for a half hour so she could go to the store. I wasn't feeling much like it, but it would only be for a little while so I said ok. My mind was all over the place trying to kick out some negative thoughts that have been lingering as of late. You know, new job worries, and general grown folks' woes. I guess lil mama could tell because rather than run amok like she normally would, she got up in my lap on the couch and laid her head on my chest.Lil One: "Tasha, what's wrong?"Me: "A lot of stuff on my mind. Just a little worried and sad."Lil One: "Don't be sad. I see you crying. (wipes my face)"Me: "Aww thanks. I'll be okay though"Lil One: "Yes you will. 'Member no matter what happens to you, the grass is still green, the sky is still blue, and ladybugs are still red."Me: "Why do you say ladybugs are still red?"Lil One: "Bec...
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Monday Mash Up
2007-04-03 04:08:00
Today was the first work day that I spent as a "lady of leisure" as Bella Mama calls it. I'm taking a week off before I start the new job, and I really can't be happier about it. Hunny and I spent basically the whole weekend bunned up, and it was nice of course, but I saw some of his crazy arse man-habits, and I had to pull a Beyonce and Upgrade his ass.He's got three sisters and no brothers, so you'd think that he would have paid attention to at least some of their upkeep habits. I mean, he was no stranger to the nail shop when I brought him there when I got my eyebrows waxed, and he's a good shopping partner--he can tell me what looks good on me, and he actually has great judgement. So imagine my utter shock and dismay when he took off his socks today and all I see were alligators arguing over a bag of flour. Dammit boo, how you gon' be so damn sessy and your feet look like what the hell? This required an immediate emergency trip to the nail place for pedicures. I really did...
More About: Mash-Up , Monday , Onda , Mash up , Mash

This is my hood now...
2007-04-01 04:36:00
I swear on my life that since I moved to the DC Urrea, I've encountered more ghetto mess and things that leave me scratching my head in one year than in my whole life in NY.First of all, I just don't get the "Curry Out". Back home we had the take out Chinese or chicken spot, but nothing on the order of the establishments here. Truth be told, I had to have a DC native translate "Curry Out" into English for me...Ohhh, you mean CARRY OUT!? You shoulda just said so, playa. Get your chicken, egg foo young, fries w/mumbo sauce (wtf is that stuff anyway??), black 'n milds, pineapple soda, and Newports all in the same place.While I'm on the Newports thing, please explain to me how these got to be the 'hood cigarette? I know a lot of black smokers, and nan' one of em smokes Marlboro or Camel. I go in 7-11 or Wawa ANYWHERE in PG County (or any predominately non-white area in the country for that matter) and the Marlboros and Camels and Winstons are always at full stock, but there's lik...
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Baby x Baby = Baby Squared
2007-03-30 04:38:00
Hey yall, I know I haven't posted much this week, but I've been in thought a lot. This week, I'm questioning the order of the world and how a lot of things work. Thanks for your suggestions on how to deal with my friend who's trying to cope with making her own decisions in this life. I talked to her tonight, and she's agreed to come with me to talk to a counselor. I think that's the right decision for her.Tonight I also had a looooong conversation with La Bella Mama, and I'm once again at a loss. She's a nurse that spent 28 years working in Labor and Delivery, and she currently works at a women's clinic, so she knows a thing or two about babies, pregnant women, and motherhood, and she has seen her fair share of strange shat in her day. She told me tonight about a case she was presented with and I was surprised to hear that it's not the first time she's dealt with this situation.She told me that in her exam room, she met with a young woman who was pregnant and confused. I...
More About: Baby , Square

Intervention Time
2007-03-26 07:55:00
Hope everyone had a great weekend. I was still dealing with a migraine, so Hunny and I stayed in all weekend and caught up on some movie watching (well he did, I was under the covers hiding from the light and trying to catch a few ZZZ's).Anyhoo...In my everyday life, I run across all kinds of BS from people, but some people are on some other stuff and I worry about their well being. There are some people I see on the almost everyday that don't seem to have a clue about how jacked up their lives really are and I'm really about to break out my psychiatrist couch, sit them down, and stage an intervention.Some people might say that I worry too much about other people, but I really don't give a damn. I'm one of those people who wants to see everyone living their very best life in the best way. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not about to be knocking at your door every Saturday morning with the Bible pushers and preaching about how you need to change your ways, cuz #1-I'm still asleep...
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Thinking Blogger Award
2007-03-26 06:53:00
Ohmydamn, A Think ing Blogger Award !I was nominated for this award by The Thinking Black Man, and I'm so proud. Thank You to everyone who takes the time to read my thoughts. I started this as just an outlet to post the randomness in my mind, and I'm proud of what it's evolved into. I know I don't always write about thought provoking topics, but I'm glad my posts can inspire some good thought and discussion.The rules of winning a THINKING BLOGGER AWARD are as follows:1. If, and ONLY IF, you get tagged, write a post with links to 5 blogs that make you think,2. Link to this post so that people can easily find the exact origin of the meme,3. Optional: Proudly display the 'Thinking Blogger Award' with a link to the post that you wrote (here is an alternative silver version if gold doesn't fit your blog).Here are my fiveTanyaGolden SilenceThe ThinkSister ToldjaField NegroThanks again for the award!!
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Music Meme
2007-03-23 17:03:00
I was tagged by Gunfighter for another meme. This one requires that I:List seven songs you are into right now. No matter what they are. They must be songs you are presently enjoying. Then tag seven other people to see what they?re listening to.I'm not much for tagging other people, so if you wanna play...cool. But here's what's on repeat in my ipod:1)Betterman by Musiq Soulchild. This is off of is new CD, Luvanmusiq. The beat reminds me of the happy church songs we'd sing when I was in the kids choir, but the song is so nice. Guess he's in luv?2)Get it Shawty by Lloyd. I'm stuck on this youngin for some reason. I was stuck on "You" for a while, and it still makes its way onto repeat now and then.3)Let's Straighten It Out by Monica and Usher. I've loved this song since I saw the movie "Panther" a while back. I know it's bitten off of Lattimore, but I still love it.4)Can't Get Enough of You by Tamia. I can't get enough of this song. Nuff said. Some people are gonna mess aro...
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Fake the Funk Friday
2007-03-23 15:23:00
I'm at work right now, pretending to look busy. I was home Wednesday and Thursday with the worst migraine I've ever had. I tried to look at the computer screen long enough to write something, but it just wasn't happening. So today, since I'm still sort of out of it, there's no Frida y Flashback video cuz Youtube makes my head hurt right now. But I will share some more of the randomness that's going on in my headache-riddled brain (warning, this might be long, it might not)...-I don't think I'm a good pet parent. I adopted two kittens from the Humane Society two months ago and I'm ready to ship them to Abu Dhabi or something. They're cute, but they've chewed damn near every wire in my home. The vet says they'll be done teething soon so the chewing will stop. If they don't, they will become kitty refugees cuz they won't be at my house.-My head still hurts so bad that my teeth hurt, but at least I can see straight today-I must have made the heavens angry cuz I'm trying to...
More About: Funk , Fake

Walking Away
2007-03-20 22:02:00
Today, I did something I?ve never done before?I abruptly walked away from a friendship, broke promises, and severed ties without looking back. And honestly, it felt good. The responsibility of maintaining this connection was more difficult than it should have been, and more strenuous than beneficial. I simply couldn?t take anymore.So to that person?I?m sorry it had to come to this, but we?re both better off. I don?t feel bad for breaking those last promises to you, because everything else was already broken. I will never accept you trying to make me feel guilty for loving my Hunny. Friendships don?t come with stipulations like that. I don?t know how you could have ever expected us to be in a relationship when in your eyes I wasn?t a person, but a smartfunnybeautifultalented robot woman. Maintaining a friendship with you became damn near impossible because when I got involved with someone romantically, you acted like I was cheating on you. I couldn?t cheat if we weren?t together, let...
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Color Me Brown
2007-03-19 19:42:00
Brown. Sepia. Mahogany. Raw Umber. Tan. I remember looking in my big box of Crayolas as a little girl, amazed at all the beautiful shades of brown in the box. When I drew pictures of my friends and family, I could use a crayon that was the same color as their skin. I loved that all of us were a slightly different color, but we were all some shade of brown so somehow that made us special together.I didn?t understand then why my brown hue was different than that of my best friends? or my cousins?, but neither did it matter. Years later, I learned why, but it still didn?t matter to me. By that time however, it did matter to some of them. The mother of one of my best friends would instruct her every summer to stay out of the sun, because there was nothing good about having extra brown, extra tan skin. God forbid she be mistaken for a real negro.My mother, and I assumed, the rest of my family was unaffected by the skin color politics of quadroons, octoroons, dark-skinned, and light-skinn...
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Friday Flashback
2007-03-16 04:07:00
This week it's "The Humpty Dance" at the suggestion of my buddy JJ:Happy Frida y !
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I loves the kids...
2007-03-15 05:00:00
Ohmydamn goodness. Parents, I know you have a hard job trying to raise your kids right and you can't force them to act like they have some sense, but some of you aren't doing your job right at all. I also recognize that teenagers have hormones, but seriously, a little home training never hurt anyone.I was out with my girl Sasha (yeah I know--Sasha and Tasha...lol or whatever) at Coldstone this evening when some teenage skeez in training tried to holla at us. Maybe it's BET, maybe it's a lack of whoop ass at home, but just damn...Boy: "Mmmm mmm mmm, I'd love to put yall in my ice cream cone"Me: "Say what now?"Boy: "Ma, don't act like you didn't hear me. Yall two is lookin tasty"Sasha: "Tasty like the Similac you just got off of apparently. Boy you are too young to be talkin to people like that"Boy: "I might got a baby face, but I'm ALL man"Me: "Where is your mama? I know you're out past your curfew"Boy: "Nah miss. I ain't gotta worry about that. So you gotta man?"Me: "Yes. ...
More About: Kids , The Kids , The Kid

Questions I've Got, Vol. 3
2007-03-13 16:59:00
-Why were there people in the self checkout line at the grocery store who don?t speak speak a lick of English? The machine doesn?t speak your language, so how are you faking the funk and managing to get your purchase done?-Why are there homeless people who are creative enough to come up with signs like this: but no employer is willing to use that creativity for their benefit and give them a chance?-Speaking of homeless people, why are there so many black and white homeless people, but so few minorities? I don?t think I?ve ever seen a Latino or Asian obviously homeless person?at least on the east coast-Why do people insist on carrying blatantly fake azz Louis Vuitton bags? If from far away the logos on your bag look like LV, but up close they look like spades and clubs from a deck of cards, you?re not fooling anyone. Instead of trying to front, just go buy the best quality bag you can for your money.-Why when a baby is over 1 or 2 years old, a parent will still say some mess like ?Oh...
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Get to know me some...
2007-03-12 17:26:00
Because I'm being lazy and because I'm sure you're just aching to get to know more about me, here's a survey that answers every question about me that you didn't have...1. EVER BEEN GIVEN AN ENGAGEMENT RING?No, but hopefully around the end of this year?2. LONGEST RELATIONSHIP?6 years3. LAST GIFT YOU RECEIVED?A beautiful photo album of cards that my gramma gave me over the years4. EVER DROPPED A CELL PHONE?I do that like once a day5. WHEN'S THE LAST TIME YOU PLAYED TRUTH OR DARE?Probably about three months ago6. THING(S) YOU SPEND A LOT OF MONEY ON?Hair/beauty, dance supplies, shoes, gas (why can?t the prices just stay the same for a month??)7. LAST FOOD YOU ATE?Chocolate chip muffin8. FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX?Smile and if they have all their teeth9. SOME FAVORITE SONGS?Too many to list10. WHERE DO YOU LIVE?DC burb, Maryland11. HIGH SCHOOL YOU ATTENDED:Albany Academy for Girls12. CELL PHONE SERVICE PROVIDER:T-Mobile13. FAVORITE MALL STORE:New York & Company...
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