La Bella Noire's Ramblings

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I moved!!
2008-01-06 04:09:00
I got fed up with all the problems that Blo.gg.er has been giving me, so I've decided to finally get it together and move to another program.You can find me now at:http://labellanoire.wordpress.comUpdat e your blogrolls, mmk. See you over there!

I Can Feel it In the Air
2008-01-02 17:35:00
Happy New Year Yall. Just clearing some mental space...I'm not usually a big fan of New Year's. All this 'New Year New You' stuff all over the place, making resolutions you know you won't keep. I've always been of the mind that there's no better time than the present to do better and be better. I can see how some people want to wait for the new year to transition away from old things...more of a mental motivation. I get it, just not for me.But this year, something is different for me. I can feel change coming in the air. Something is brewing in my world, and I know somethings, some relationships, some of everything in my life will be coming to a crossroads soon. And for that reason, I'm putting in the extra work to make me a better me. There was a lot of old baggage that I've carried around for most of my life (a lot of it I didn't even recognize as baggage anymore, I just counted it as part of me) that I let go of in the last 12-18 months, and that's made some people unc...
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Happy New Year
2008-01-01 16:41:00
Happy 2008!! It's a brand new year and I've got a whole lot of stuff to talk about. Last night was too much fun, and it was spent with the people I love (and I'm paying for it today, lol). Hope you all brought in the year happily. I'll be up and posting tomorrow. Enjoy the holiday yall!
More About: New Year , Happy , Happy New Year , Year

Merry Christmas!
2007-12-25 15:26:00
Christmas is a special time of year to remember those who are close toour hearts!May your days be bright, and your heart be light!May this glorious day of our Savior's birthresound with hope and peace on earth!Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!Lots of Love,Tasha and D**Back to regular posting after New Year's**
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What in all the hell...
2007-12-19 03:40:00
is wrong with the Spears family? I just read that Bri.tney's 16-year old sister Jam.ie Ly.n.n who stars in her own show on Nicke.lode.on is pregnant by her 19-year old long-term and live-in boyfriend (read here).Ok, now I got into some shit when I was that age, but at least I had a mother who cared enough to make sure that the shit I got into wasn't completely life-changing to that degree. What kind of parent allows their minor child to have a live-in boyfriend?? And the boyfriend is of majority age (over 18)?! What in the name of everything good?And they met in church they say; I guess they don't believe in birth control for religious reasons. But this is where my confusion about this subject sets in. It's not okay to use birth control, but it's okay for a man of majority age to impregnate a young woman out of wedlock? There's no fire and brimstone 'you're going to hell in a handbasket' sermon for that? I need help understanding. Stuff like this is exactly why I'm not sur...
More About: Hell

Friday Flashback
2007-12-14 13:41:00
This week it's Marvin Gaye's "Sexual Healing" cuz you know we can all use it sometimes, lol. Happy Friday !
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TV Talk Thursday
2007-12-13 14:51:00
So I watched that mess of a show "Crowned" that came on after the finale of Top Model last night (yay Saleisha, btw) and tragically I liked it. I guess watching mothers and daughters make fools out of themselves for the sake of being on TV makes me thank the heavens that there's some pride left in my family. Almost trailer trashy good. It will do as a replacement for ANTM I guess.And then I almost burned my retinas out watching Snoop Dogg's Father Hood show. I don't know if this is supposed to be a bootleg Run's House, but it was a funky fried hot mess. First of all, I thought Snoop had a bigger house than that, but seeing him and his wife interact was painful. The show seemed to be scripted, and they weren't doing a good job at keeping up with the script. Boring, big yawn. The funniest part of the show was Snoop running out of the blind accupuncturist's office screaming, "Chuuch on the Move". Might catch the marathon when it comes on, but I can't make that a part of my regul...
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Come get yo' kids
2007-12-11 06:15:00
It's Christmastime. I'm well aware of it, but all the kids in our families won't let me forget. With me having 70+ nieces and nephews--I stopped counting at 72 (that does include the step fam) and with D having 7 of his own, we have frequent reminders that it's time to buy gifts. About 25 of them are under the age of 18, so we get emails and phonecalls all the time that go something like this:"Uncle D! Aunt Tasha! I've been good all year. You know it's Christmas riiiiight? I'm really good at playing the bowling game on my friend's Wii. It would be nice to not have to play the game at their house. I could share it with my sisters/brothers/parents"I don't know when it became okay to solicit gifts like that, and I've attempted to put the kids (AND their parents) in check, but since we're family we get it the worst.But outside the family, kids everyone is getting bold. Maybe it's that time of year or maybe people just need more home training. Here are some conversations I'v...
More About: Kids

Monday Mashup
2007-12-10 16:22:00
This weekend was one of the more uneventful weekends of my life. Due to my tooth situation (which has been taken care of) I was laid out. A new filling and some "good" painkillers made my day. Thanks Gunfighter!! I owe you big time! I left the house twice this weekend--to run to the store and to run to Su.bwa.y. It was rainy and cold, and none of the girls wanted to go out, and D had to work. So I spent time with the couch, with my blankies, and with my eyes closed catching some zzz's. Loves it.Today I have a phone interview at 10:30AM. Hey, I may as well make use of this time off and find a new job. Really hoping this comes through so I don't have to go back, lol. But I'm kinda mad that the lady doing the interview said that they'd call me at 10:30 but I need to be available for an hour after that time in case they call me late. Wow. Isn't it rude to be late for a meeting that you scheduled? But that's a state gov't employer for you. This is a position I've been eyeing for ...
More About: Monday , Mashup , Mash

Help a sista out
2007-12-07 07:38:00
It's 1:40AM and I'm looking for either a dentist or a pair of pliers. Right now, I'd kinda prefer the pliers. Just take matters into my own hands and get things done quick fast and in a hurry. My neighbor made us some peanut butter and toffee cookies and brought them over last night. Wonderful! Ahh yes, we love our neighbors.But apparently my teeth don't like my neighbors. I think Mrs. Neighbor put a little too much toffee or molasses or whatever sticky stuff goes in those things cuz a filling in my back tooth got caught up in the cookie and came.completely.out. I spat out an entire filling. Granted it's like 5 years old, but I thought fillings are supposed to last a lifetime.Now I'm in pain. I can't describe it but to say I feel like my molars got hit by a train. I only had three fillings in my mouth, but I guess I can now bring that number to 2. Except for me being in pain at such a stupid hour of the morning, it normally wouldn't be a big deal--just go to the dentist ASAP...

I Know What You Did
2007-12-05 08:09:00
Dear Waiting Room Lady,Going to the doctor can be stressful I know. Really, I understand. I've seen more labcoats and stethescopes in the last three months than I have since birth. And I understand everybody reacts to stress in different ways, but I'm at a loss when it comes to your situation.The small talk was fine. Yeah, I know snow is in the forecast and we have differing opinions on the white flaky stuff. I love it, you hate it. I can drive in it, you can't. It's alright though, cuz we share a common ground in our appreciation for the Jackson 5 Christmas music that was playing in the office. Jokes about what Mike's done to himself. Cute.But then you started up, and things got awkward. You untied your shoes and proceeded to remove your red socks, which just happened to be full of lint pillballs. Yeah, you were that close to me. I could see that ish. Then you took a tissue out of your little kitty cat kleenex holder and wiped the sweat off of your feet. I threw up in my mouth...

Three Hunned
2007-12-04 13:51:00
Wow, this is my 300th post! I can't believe that milestone came so quick. *wipes tear* And I'd like to thank the Academy...Moving on, this leave of absence has given me the chance to do stuff and go places during the weekday that I usually wouldn't get to otherwise and I keep running into situations where I'm asking "where is your mother?". Like one day last week, I went to Dun.k.in Don.uts at like 11:30 in the morning to get some yummy high-calorie coffee goodness and there was a kid probably about 8 years old standing at the counter in front of me.Employee: "How can I help you young man?"Kid: "I want coffee. With creams and sugars and equals and milk"Employee: "All of that in one coffee? What size"Kid: "Coffee is liquid. It doesn't come in a special size"Employee: "Well what size cup do you want me to put the coffee in?"Kid: "Well it's for my mom and my mom's pretty fat so I'd say the biggest Extra Large you have"Me: "Where's your mom?"Kid: "In the car"Employee: "You migh...

Yeah yeah
2007-12-03 06:06:00
I figured it was about time I got back to blogger, I kinda missed yall maybe just a little. Anyway, I hope everyone had a good Turkey Day. I know I'm all late since it's December now and all. Speaking of it being December, where the hell did the year go? I'm mad that I've been seeing commercials for "Best of 2007" specials and what not. My Thanksgiving was good I guess. I had a sinus infection paired with an ear infection and a touch of bronchitis, so I was all stuffy and couldn't taste a damn thing. I didn't really have an appetite either cuz I was sneezing and huffin and puffin everydamnwhere. I hear the food was bangin though. Me and D spent the day with his family, and while I was sad that I couldn't go home to see my parents, it was still cool. His family just accepts me like one of their own, and I never feel like an outsider so it was actually really nice. My only problem with the day was all the old people giving me their remedies for getting over the flu (they swore ...
More About: Yeah

Life Caught Up
2007-11-20 13:38:00
I'm stepping away from blogging until Monday cuz life finally caught up with me. I'm sick as a dog...home for the second day in a row (even though I have like zero sick time). Thanksgiving is this week, and because of my job not giving us Friday off (and not letting anyone have it off, period) I can't go home. I'll be spending the holiday with D's family, which is great, but I've never not been home for this holiday. Same will happen for Christmas. Oh, and I have to go talk to another pathologist about this cancer mess cuz something apparently doesn't look right. I'm going through some thangs yall, pray for me. I'll be back on Monday.Have a blessed and happy Turkey Day!
More About: Life , Caught

Wednesday Randoms
2007-11-14 12:24:00
-It's 6:26 AM right now, and I don't have to be up for another 30 minutes but I'm up, so I figured I'd blog now cuz the plantation's been monitoring everyone's web activity. -I'm happy to be going to see the fam in BK this weekend. Me and D will finally get to see my new niece!-I'm mad that some lil kid overheard my conversation and that I have cancer and asked all loud why I still have hair. His mother didn't see anything wrong with the line of questioning and actually wanted the answer. I didn't have it in me to argue right then so I just walked away. Have some decorum people.-It's eating me up inside that it's getting harder to talk to my mother about anything. Last night I told her that I got a call from my father and she just changed the subject. Me: "Pop called me last night" Her: "I went to yoga today." Me: "Pop called me last night" Her: "I said went to yoga today". Me: "I have to go"-It's that time of year when old friends find each other. In the last week, I'...
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Monday Monday
2007-11-12 15:34:00
Back on the plantation again. Hope yall had a good weekend. Friday was D's birthday, and we had a great time. Let me sum up my night for you:Instead of "Duck, Duck, Goose" it was more like "Drink, Drink, Drunk". Yeah. That's all I can say about that. And I'm mad at D for being in my face taking pictures when I was umm...not at my best, lol.The rest of the weekend was all about the couch. I went out with L on Saturday night, but we were cold and didn't feel like standing outside trying to get in someone's club, so we went to Maggie Moo's and got some ice cream then went home. I know that sounds backwards getting ice cream when you're cold, but it really hit the spot. Sunday = football. Watched my Giants turn in a less than stellar performance and then I fell asleep on the couch. Me and the couch have been getting in some quality time as of late cuz when the weather gets cold, I turn in to a serious homebody. Anyway, I hope yall had a good weekend. What'd you get into? Get at ...
More About: Monday

Happy Birthday to Ya!!
2007-11-09 15:13:00
Today is D's birthday, so it's a party all day. I can hear Eddie Murphy singing now, "My girl wants to party alll the tiiiiiiimmmee...." (If you don't know that song, be thankful)*shaking head*. Anyway, we're going out with a bunch of our friends for dinner and drinks later on. He's usually pretty mellow--even about birthdays, but he's all hyped about going out tonight. A few of the people we're going out with are all hyped and acting funny about tonight too...so I know something is up. We'll see though. I got my digital camera back, so I'll have photographic evidence to use in case I need to blackmail someone later, lol.The rest of the weekend I'll be out and about with my girl L, and then doing more wedding stuff. Sunday though, will be a study in bumology--me, the couch, football, and a beer or two. Just the way it's supposed to be, lol. Just for the weekend, I hope to forget about cancer and ovaries and pain.Anyway, it's Friday. It's Payday. It's a great day. Hope ...
More About: Happy , Birthday , Happy Birthday

Only Me
2007-11-07 15:17:00
I swear some things can only happen to me. That's why I love my life so much. Just about everywhere I go is guaranteed embarassment, comedy, or an unfortunate mix of both. Yesterday, I went to get my spa on to get my mind off of my health debacle. Had a big steamy mug of green tea at home, then off I went. It was my kind of beautiful day--chilly with the sun shining, everything and everyone looking happy. Just lovely. Got to the dayspa just fine, got my robe and got ready for another cup of tea. Umm, forgot the flippy flops that I usually take with me, so I was wearing their "disposables". Apparently me and thin footie fabric don't mix. I walked out of the dressing room toward the little tea table and slid into the damn thing. I didn't knock it down, but I have a big azz bruise on my right hip now to remind me to take small steps when I wear those things. Note to self: bring flippy flops or slippers next time. Do NOT wear the disposables. NO.All was well, had my tea then settled ...

Spa Day!
2007-11-06 16:09:00
It's been pretty rough going as of late, so I'm playing hooky and taking a spa day--just me and zero distractions with a good massage and facial. It's going to be a good day. I'll catch up with yall tomorrow!

Quiet Monday
2007-11-05 15:01:00
Ladybugs are still red. All weekend, I've been hearing my little cousin's wise words; and truly they've never been more appropriate I guess.I found out Friday that I do have the early stages of cervical cancer. It's very early and very treatable. So no chemo and no radiation right now, thank God. I have to have a procedure done that will basically burn the top layers of my cervix off, and therefore burn off all of the "damaged" (cancerous) cells (we hope). I hear it's an easy procedure, but we'll see. There will be lots of follow up before and after, to make sure the damaged cells don't spread. I also have a ginormous cyst on my left ovary. Like peanut sized, damn. It'll come off the same day that I have the other procedure done. So yay, I get to keep both of my ovaries! I really never thought I'd see the day that I make a statement like that.It's still hard for me to put it in my mind that I have cancer. Tears come in spells, even today. I know I'm lucky that we caught i...
More About: Monday , Quiet

Friday Flashback
2007-11-02 13:22:00
I'm a nervous mess cuz I get the pathology reports from the biopsy this afternoon. I can barely string a thought together after being told that it's urgen that I don't miss this appointment, so I'll leave you with this. It's Faith Evans, "Aint Nobody". I'll be doing the usual this weekend...lunch or dinner with the girls, wedding stuff, house hunting stuff, date night with D, and catching a few zzzz's. Hope you all have a good weekend, stay blessed and fab.
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Tagged!
2007-11-01 14:30:00
DurtyMo tagged me...The rules of the game are:A). Link to the person that tagged you and post the rules on your blog...B). Share 7 random and/or weird facts about yourself...C). Tag 7 random people at the end of your post and include links to their blogs...D). Let each person know that they've been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.I don't know how much more random stuff I can share about myself, but here we go...1. If I wear a pair of socks bowling, I won't wear them again. I know they "sanitize" the rented shoes, but I can't get myself to wear the socks again, no matter how much bleach and boiling water I use to wash them. Something about knowing that my socks have touched other people's foot germs...bleh.2. I don't know how to play checkers. I can play chess with the best of them, but checkers is beyond my comprehension for some reason.3. I broke my nose when I was 7 jumping double dutch. My shoelace got caught up in the rope and then my ankles got caught up and I h...
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Happy Halloween
2007-10-31 14:43:00
It's Halloween , so that means we'll be hearing "Thriller", "Freaks Come Out At Night", and "Somebody's Watching Me" at least once today. But because I love (black) Michael Jackson, here's "Thriller" to get you in the Halloween spirit:Have a great day yall!
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Weekend Recap
2007-10-29 14:30:00
I'm so glad to be back home. I flew home this weekend (I don't know why I didn't do that before, cuz all that driving is really over-rated). Had a great flight in, even though the weather was atrocious (LOL, I love hearing that word with a British accent). It was the first time I've gone home without D, so we were a mess at the airport as I was getting ready to go through security. Hugs that lasted 2 minutes too long and all that. But when I got to mom's it was ON.I got off the plane at about 7:30AM. Mom and Daddy took me out to breakfast and we did some family stuff for a lil while. Great. I was kinda out of it cuz you know I'd been up since 4AM, but nice anyway. We dropped Daddy off at home, and then me and my mom went to the bridal store. Big.azz.mistake.D is really involved with all of this wedding planning, even down to my dress. I've wanted his input on the dress I'm going to wear because it's his wedding too. The wedding, at least in our eyes, is NOT all about the br...
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Friday Flashback
2007-10-26 14:04:00
It's raining in the "urrea", so I guess this one fits. It's Oran "Juice" Jones, "The Rain":I'm going to see my mama for a lil bit this weekend, you know...get some good home cooked food and all that. Hope you all have a good weekend. Stay blessed, stay fabulous.
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D says...
2007-10-25 15:08:00
Finally he got around to responding to your questions. A lot of them were the same question, just asked different ways, so here goes...What is your definition of love?Well love is hard to describe but I'll try. For me, love is you being able to care for someone no matter what they do or say, and being able to accept and appreciate the other person's faults. I wish I could answer this better for you. It is hard to describe and even harder to find. I will say that people use the word too easily. Love is everlasting, even when things go bad. Love is the evolution of like.What quirky habits do you have?I guess the most quirky habit I have is when the Redskins play I wear my Redskins jersey. Boring. What's the best thing you've ever done in the army?I did alot of good things in the Army, but my best thing was coming home alive from the war in Afghanistan.What do you hate most about your job?I suppose taking police reports for petty things is probably one of my most serious dislikes o...

Varsity Blues
2007-10-24 16:20:00
Varsity means nothing. I repeat, Varsity means NOTHING when you are over the age of 21. Undergrad is gone, highschool is a vague memory.See, I played varsity volleyball all through high school and for a while in college. I even played in one of those "I'm not a kid anymore" corporate leagues for a minute after I graduated. So you'd think that I have some skills, right? Riiight??Well, I do. Umm, I did anyway. The only skills I've got right now are in IcyHot application and Advil poppin. Me and my "I played varsity" self decided that it would be fun to help my cousin for the evening coaching her daughter's team. After the news I got, I needed a distraction. (I'll get to explaining what happened when I manage to find the words) Not an overall bad decision, execpt for the fact that I wanted to participate with the players. *Ahem* Did I mention that I am NOT 16 anymore? To my own damn dismay, I pulled the serious 'I'm getting old' move and said, "lemme show yall what we did when ...
More About: Blues

Let Me Count the Ways
2007-10-23 17:25:00
Sorry in advance for the sappiness of this post.I got some news today, and it wasn't good. *sigh* and *sigh* again, I'll explain soon. I want to cry. I'll make it through, but alone it would be even harder. All my trials, and the one I'm staring in the face, have been made easier cuz of him. D, I stand by you, with you, and next to you because...1)You love me better than anyone ever has2)You make me want to be a better woman3)You protect my body, soul, and spirit4)You put GOD first in your world5)You respect my womanhood6)You support me during my struggles7)You wipe my tears and cry with me8)You know how I feel about something before I do9)You make my morning right10)When the world is harsh, you hold me gentlyThanks for holding me up over the last few weeks, when the stuff has been rough. Thanks for letting me know that I won't have to do this alone.
More About: Count

Monday Mashup
2007-10-22 15:39:00
Ugh. Monday , I wish I could rewind to Saturday and keep enjoying the weekend. Friday's biopsy went well I guess. 4 lesions on my cervix were biopsied and they don't look right, but we'll see when I get the pathology report on November 2. And she did an endometrial biopsy also, which means she got some cultures from my uterus too. No, no anesthesia involved. They said it would *pinch*. Pinch my azz, that mess is sooo painful. I'm still sore and can't do any lifting or go to the gym until the end of the week. I'll spare the nastier details of what's going on, but it's not cute lemmetellya. But thanks for all the prayers and well wishes you all have given, it truly means a lot. Love ya blog peoples!But Saturday, I got my ish together for the most part and went shopping with the girls all day. I paid for it--my wallet was lighter, and I felt the effects physically. Umm, when the doctor says relax, you're supposed to do that. Not run all over central MD shopping all day. *sigh*....
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Happy Friday...
2007-10-19 15:31:00
Hey yall...I'm not going to move the blog for a little while yet because I'm having some trouble moving my archived posts. Hopefully in the next week or so. But I'll be posting here regularly in the meantime.I have another biopsy today. I'm not looking forward to it because they hurt so much. I also have to go over the details of the oophorectomy (ovary removal) today. I haven't really posted this week because I've been trying to get myself okay with the fact that I may be thrown into pre-menopause this early in my life. I'll be on estrogen replacement therapy so hopefully that will regulate things. So I'm left knowing that my child bearing window is severely limited.So be it though. Whatever I'm supposed to go through God already has destined for me, so I know I shouldn't worry about it. *sigh*. I wish it weren't me, but I wouldn't want anyone else to deal with this.Anyway, this weekend is all about the shopping. Me and a bunch of girlfriends are going to the outlets on...
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