Mrs. FlingerMrs. FlingerKnocked up mother of an active toddler wishing for a glass of wine ...or ten Articles
On living other’s dogma
2012-01-07 05:47:00 The alarm went off at 7AM for the first day of fifth grade. My dad was in his suit walking out the door as he heard me grumble and get up. “Life sucks and then you die,” he greeted me. This is the first of a thousand similar morning greetings he would say as he suited up and walked out the door to work. I always thought this was just my Dad’s “thang.” Like he loved the Aggie’s football or playing war games on the computer. I thought it was sort of just something he muttered like when he sneezed “Jesus Christ on a commode.” It was one of his quirks, those parts of Dad that made him? well, Dad. Years and years later, at thirty-five, I sit talking across an impossible valley. As it turns out, my dad is not the only one to say this as he went to work each morning. In fact, it’s something many dads said as they embarked on their early morning trek. It was not just dads in suits, or dads at mills, or dads with fancy cars or fre... More About: Living
The Red Tent of Flinger-ville. Or something like that but modern and with l
2012-01-07 05:47:00 It was a familiar feeling, one I can easily conjure up in my mind. Not until I was leaving did I realize how long it’s actually been that the four of us where together in the same house. What was it, 1995? Was I married back then? Did Dani have to wear a bra back then? Did Kim have kids? Was I battling gray hair? My sister, my mother, my cousin and I sat drinking sprite infused juice (cough) while taking copious amounts of photos and rocking the baby to sleep. It was a familiar scene even though I can’t place when that would have ever happened. My sister lived in Tuscan Arizona five of the last six years. My cousin is only now old enough to be a “person” off to college. My mother lives even further, back in Houston, near the small town my sister and I grew up in. And I? Well, I tend to never sit still for very long. So when realization hits and I’m sitting there laughing about stories from childhood, I forget how rare this event truly is. Technology ... More About: Modern
May your holidays be everything you asked for and then some
2012-01-07 05:47:00 I am blessed with people in my life whom I share traditions with. We watch our children grow together. They bring me joy well beyond a generic word like “blessed.” Each year, for as many years as my youngest has been alive, we gather at Christmas to exchange gifts and create christmas memories to hang on our trees. These memories: beaded off-center balls, reindeer with too much glue, pictures of children years younger under glitter and foam; are treasures of magnificence. We hang each on branches every year in prideful spots. These ornaments, complete with thumbprint-smeared reindeer heads, go in the front of the tree. We’re proud of our inability to craft at our house. To visitors it appears we’re all a bit special-needs with glue but we see laughter and disastrous glitter accidents and children aching to be with their friends. This year I drew my friend’s seven year old son. This kid is an old man trapped in a young-person’s body. While my ... More About: Holidays
Picking your battles
2012-01-07 05:47:00 This morning my daughter came down decked out in layers of plaid skirts, short tights, polka dot socks and crocks. Her paisley purple shirt topped off the entire outfit with a proper bow at the neckline. She illuminated joy from every ounce of her 7 year old tiny body. “Wow, hon! You’re a party!” She beamed at this compliment from me and sat down all sorts of matter-of-fact at breakfast ready for the day. My kid? She has the pizazz. I remember someone cooing over her as a baby. “Doesn’t she just bring you so much joy?” It was an innocent question from a perfect stranger, but at the time she was a three week old leech taking every ounce of my sanity in chunks of 45 minute sleeping blocks. I looked up, bleary eyed, and tried to smile a genuine smile all the while thinking, “Mister, have you HAD babies?” It turns out? He had. His kids were grown now and he was looking at my three week old baby girl with eyes of decades of memories....
On darkness.. and light
2012-01-07 05:47:00 One of my favorite episodes of my favorite TV show ever is “Northern Light s” of Northern Exposure Episode 4:3. It’s an analogy of light within the depths of darkness. Goethe?s final words: ?More Light?. Ever since we crawled out of that primordial slime, that?s been our unifying cry. More light. Sunlight, torchlight, candlelight, neon, incandescent? Lights to banish the darkness from our caves, to illuminate our roads, the insides of our refrigerators. Big floods for the nigthgames at Soldier?s Field. Little tiny flashlight for the books we read under the covers when we?re supposed to be asleep. Light is more than watts and foot candles. Light is metaphor. Thy word is a lamp under my feet. Rage, rage against the dying of the light. Lead kindly light, amid the encircling gloom. Lead Thou [You] me on. The night is dark and I am far from home. Lead Thou me on. Arise, shine for thy light has come. Light is knowledge. Light is life. Light is light. We’...
On Depression and Darkness
2012-01-07 05:47:00 Events, months, season, holidays, years. Each one sliding by less influential each time. The daylight ends so early now. Darkness chills the children as they walk off school busses. Commuters rush in drizzle rain to the warmth and glow of home. There is a place I dislike to go. My mind swirls with lonely thoughts. If I chat loud enough, I do not hear her. I try to not hear winter breathing down my neck. A year? Two? More? How long has this winter lasted? Why is she here again, so soon? My children delight in the dark. “It’s almost Christmas! Mom, look!” breathless they point at the houses already lit with twinkle lights. I smile, aching for their joy. I hold them close, hoping by some tactile osmosis, their enthusiasm for life will soak in to my bones. I cling to them almost with unhealthy gulps. The very people who used to cause me such anguish, such uncertainty, are the very ones who seem to be saving me of myself. I curl up with them in their beds, listen... More About: Depression
On fifteen minutes
2012-01-07 05:47:00 “Mamma, will you play with me?” There are three other children at school outside playing under the careful eye of their pre-school teacher. I briefly consider the deadlines, the emails, the phone calls. “Yes, Buddy, I will.” His face lights up and he runs to select a ball from the bin. We play “kick the ball” which could also be called soccer if we were a little more agile. At first we are tame, kicking softly, rolling the light red ball across the cement in the covered area back and forth from my large feet to his tiny ones. One of us kicks it a bit too hard and the other laughs as the ball bounces off the divider and the wall. We kick with a twirl. We kick with both feet after jumping. We kick until the ball flies over our heads and we giggle. I am there, at the preschool, in the crisp autumn air with my son laughing while the inbox sits and the clock relents. Finally it is time for me to leave. I hug, I kiss, I smother with so much love I h...
On #EECI2011
2012-01-07 05:47:00 We are over Deluth. We are leaving the Big Apple behind in sunset lights and long shadows. I ponder the past few days, how a few days can be such a grand event, how every group of few days provides alternate versions of life. Carrying my camera down the streets of Brooklyn, watching with the eye of an observer, I pictured myself walking to the cafe to meet a friend on this sunny morning. I would know the cafe barista because this is what we do most Saturdays. I’m not sure if I own a dog, a small one, in this alternate life, but if I do, he walks with me as the kids run ahead. I can see this all through my lens, and my eyes tear up for a brief second with the thought of my children, how wonderfully in love I am with them, how deeply I miss them every single trip, and how desperate I am to show them these lives, even if we do not live them. *I should always wear a Jenn Lukas as an accessory.* It is not that I have such a wide array of worldly experience that these...
On turning seven. Alternate title: HOLYCRAPYOUARESEVEN
2012-01-07 05:47:00 I remember the day I peed on a stick and shockingly read two lines. I remember the day we found out we were having a girl. I remember the long, difficult struggle of birth and the weeks and months following. The transition to being your mom wasn’t an easy one but those are all memories now. I have completely, utterly, hopelessly, passionately fallen in love with you, my daughter, my pixie, my joy, my pride. You grow every day to be a person I am proud of. You create, you laugh, you rejoice. You show me what living with imagination is. You teach me to ride my bike in the grass because cement isn’t necessary. You invite me in to your imagination of talking horses and pet shops. You warm me with your arms and your impossibly long legs, mygod how did they get so long, wrap around my waist when I lift you for possibly the last time of your life. You love your brother with so much strength, allowing him still to climb in to your lap. You are patient with him, mostly, ... More About: Title
If Dr. Seuss wrote about real life instead of Whoville…
2011-01-19 11:23:00 Right before Thanksgiving, a feast of turkey and more Our daughter danced in socked feet, slipped to the hardwood floor Busting open up her chin, seven stitches she bravely took After all the kids were settled, we promptly went to Redhook Another day of working from home, a fire I could not attain Smoke suddenly filled the house, we waited in the rain Two fire trucks and four firemen appeared in gear that day The smoking log they finally found, made it look foul-play The next busy thursday, busier than the usual Flings’ A call prevented my Canadian trip, someone took our things My wedding ring, baby photos, the iPad I had won They’re out there with the Wii, in some big stack of fun Three weekend days to recover, not nearly enough Wondering what is wrong with people, an attack we rebuff When suddenly the water heater, not having been attended to Decides it’s time to mix things up! Fuck Chrismtmas! Such hullabaloo! A deductible, a water heater, four new locks and... More About: Life , Real , Wrote
Win an ExpressionEngine Freelancer License!
2011-01-19 11:23:00 I get asked to do a lot of giveaways. Why don’t I? A lot of the time it’s crap. People, I have no shortage of crap. If you live anything like I do, I’m thinking you don’t either. So this particular giveaway is hand picked by me, from my heart, to you. Yesterday I had the joy of launching an exciting new venture at work. With an amazing designer working after hours in Ireland while I tossed in code, we pulled together a freaking BEAUTIFUL page (if I say so myself) to promote our participation in the Fusion Ads Bundle. (Seriously, I said, “WE NEED A COUNTER! ..... AND SNOW!” and then John Henry is all “KAPLOW WITH AWESOME” and behold! THE AWESOME.) Okok enough with the blahblahblah, what is ExpressoinEngine and why do I want to win it? EE, as the cool kids call it, is a Publishing Engine. (Think awesome content management for large projects ... or even small ones like this here blog which has been on EE for six years.) Like Wor...
I’ve been trying to tell you I love you
2011-01-19 11:23:00 I recently posted a photo. The title was, “Such a thin, small window separates us. Literally and Figuratively.” I watched the homeless man wander on the sidewalk as I sipped a latte. I looked for him later to give him a few dollars but he had already left by the time I stepped out to find him. It is in this spirit that several amazing people have entered our lives recently. It’s been a rough year. It’s been a tough month. It’s been a really hard few weeks. We’ve been discussing our life a lot lately. We both feel that the culmination of events of the past six years have brought us to this point. There’s a boiling point we’ve reached, a cliff, the end-of-a-sidewalk, if you will. It’s a bit like it’s now or never. Change or fail. The robbery was the last straw for us. At each turn we told each other things were looking up, we were going to be ok, everything was going to be fine. Every time we felt optimistic, life cr... More About: Love , I Love You
How do we not have a cure for RSV yet?
2011-01-19 11:23:00 When my son was a preemie, we were told RSV IS THE DEVIL. I was a paranoid, germ-a-phobe literally walking around making people Purrell before they could LOOK at the baby. If I had face masks, I would’ve made you wear them. No, I’m serious. Now I’m much more relaxed with germs. “Bah! It’s the floor! Whatever, just wipe off the gummy bear and eat it anyway.” My kids go to public schooling institutions. There’s not a lot I can do to prevent illness anymore. I’m over the whole “baby in a bubble” thing. But mothereff I need to revisit that. We have The RSV. Most notably, *I* have The RSV. My son and I share hours of hacking while my daughter is recovering. It’s estimated that RSV is the most common germ that causes lung and airway infections in infants and young children. Apparently I’m a big baby because dang, yo, this shit sucks. Whiskey does not even cure it. So excuse the hacking and snot-dripping wh...
The Winner of the Freelancer EE LIcense Announced. Congrats @awsmsrc
2011-01-19 11:23:00 It was time, past time, to pick the winner of my “what super hero would you be” content for a Freelancer license. To be fair, I did draw Laura’s number first. But, as she confessed, she has no shortage of licenses, what with being married to the president and all, so I redrew. I’m thrilled THRILLED to announce a friend of mine in the EE community, Matt Robin won the license. Way to go Random.ORG. Thank you to everyone who played along. As a side note, I’ve decided my Super Hero power would be flight. I could fly to Paris for coffee and Rome for lunch and be home in time to grab the kids from school. I’d be a bird. How did I never think of that until now? (Which, I guess is more of an animal than a super power, but I’d be the bestest super human bird EVER. I’d build really cool nests made of organic materials. Yaknow, LIKE ALL BIRDS DO. Oh shut up.) (Doesn’t that sort of beg the question: what animal would you be?) More About: Winner
FAIL BIG OR GO HOME
2011-01-19 11:23:00 I don’t really “DO” New Year’s Resolution, yanno? I see it as just one more thing to fail at by the third week, oh who am I kidding, the third day in to the New Year. Oddly enough, my boss told me to embrace failing this year. “Try to fail more this year” he said. Uh. Ok. There’s a theory to this and it sounded as eloquent as shit when he told it to me. I just can recollect that right now. But I get the point: Don’t be afraid to fail. You’re not trying if you’re not failing. You’ll never know the limits if you don’t push them too far. And other such clichés. (Like I said, it was eloquent as shit when he told it to me.) So, I’d like to introduce a few things I’m going to fail at this year in list form because I like lists and you’re too busy to read paragraphs anyway. 1. I will fail at being a marketing director: I will. I understand logic and coding and social media but I do not know ... More About: Home
The Blogroll’s death and resurrection. I guess you can say, my blogro
2011-01-19 11:23:00 Blogrolls are IN. Blogrolls are contervesial! They’re outdated! YOU SUCK ‘cause I’M NOT LISTED. List me and I’ll list you? Drama. I took my blogroll down several versions of design ago. I knew it was outdated. I knew some of my blogger friends moved to facebook only or ditched the online world completely. But I have to confess, I often forget to click and read, even for a minute, without your shiny faces, avatars, logos, whatever, over there smiling at me. And yes, it’s out of date. I took out a few links that were so old the internet declared them rusty. And I don’t have some of my favorite people on there like Not a girl, not yet a wino and Mr. Lady and Overflowing brain and Momma’s Gone City and Child’s Play X2 and Sesame Ellis and Blythe and Sizzle Says or The Spohrs are Multiplying. No, I’ll have to download some avatars and update that space with those URLs soon. But I’m curious: In 2011, in the age of “TH... More About: Blogroll , Death
Like the Red Tent but without the tent or ancient rituals
2011-01-19 11:23:00 I’ve written about The Red Tent before. I loved this book about womanly camaraderie based in fictional ancient biblical times. It’s the sort of book that makes a lady a feminist. You practically wanna shout to your random sisters-of-the-hood from across the street, “YOU GO HONEY! YOU CAN DO IT! WE FUCKING BLEED ONCE A MONTH AND STILL TACKLE THE WORLD!” Then you high five a million angels and she high fives them back. Lady angels, of course. Or maybe that’s just me and possibly Liz Lemon. Consider this the eloquent transition from The Red Tent and 30Rock to how my friends ended up in a kitchen with our underwear on. Some good friends of mine decided to do a weight-loss challenge together. A few of us gained a few pounds (cough seven) over the holiday and wanted to get back to our sleek, healthy selves but with some good ol’ competition with money involved. Nothing strengthens friendship like placing money between it. So we gathered together in...
Who you should nominate for teh Bloggies.
2011-01-19 11:23:00 This time of year makes my skin itch. Mainly because the heat is always on and the air is so dry, but ALSO because the weblog awards come out about now and everyone gets all weird about it. Everyone says “those are SOOOO 2004.” But let me tell you, I was in them (ok, one) in 2004, and I’m not proud to admit that I buckle under the pressure of a pretend award like the zipper of my jeans do on Thanksgiving. That doesn’t stop me from nominating you, though. As “they” say, I hope it truly is just a joy to be nominated because you have been. In no particular order, I will tell you who to nominate. Not only will you do so (waves hand as if using the force) but you will tell others to do so as well. (waves hand back) Here, ladies and gentleman (one) is my predication for the final contestants of this year bloggies. Photo Blog: Clearly, Chookooloonks is a must. I’ve known Karen since 2004 when she first adopted her daughter, Alex. I love ...
My Mind Enema
2011-01-19 11:23:00 “Um, do you have sage?” I ask at Whole Foods. It seems logical that if one would need something to cleanse spirits, Whole Foods would have it. You know: Hippies and all that. “You mean for burning?” I clearly don’t know what I’m talking about. I think you burn it. I’m not sure what I’m looking for but I’ve been told by at least four people to try a sage cleanse for our house so this year will be infinitely better than the last. Sage cleansing. I couldn’t even bother to look it up before I go marching in to Whole Foods to buy it. “Here you go,” says the thin, purposefully unkempt girl working at the Yuppy-Hippie-Overpriced-Grocery-Store. She leaves and I’m faced with a decision; two small sage sticks or one large stick? “We need all the cleansing possible,” I mutter and grab the biggest sage stick I can find. It sounds cheesy, and it is, I’m sure. Sage cleansing our house? As ... More About: Mind
Themes: Tomorrow I turn thirty-five and I still don’t know what the h
2010-10-29 17:37:00 Have you ever noticed how sometimes a certain theme will pop up in your life at one time? Like when you ask a friend for a DVD she borrowed and she mentions that perhaps you let another friend borrow it and that friend, without prompting what-so-ever mentions that DVD and brings it back? It’s like just by saying the DVD title out loud, all of the universe collectively worked with some weird underground energy current and subconsciously effected the mind of your friend? Or is that just way too new age bullshit? It’s happened a lot to me. Ok, maybe not “A LOT” but it happens. I’ll mention something to a friend and suddenly that same thing will pop up again in other places. Sort of like when you buy a new car and all of a sudden EVERYONE has that same new car. I know they all had that car before and you just never noticed it because it wasn’t on your radar, but still. You have to admit, it’s kind of weird, right? When I was in Germany, my ho... More About: Themes , Tomorrow
The One Where I AM In Germany
2010-10-27 22:33:00 I can’t begin to explain how much fun I’ve had here in Germany . There are no words. It’s a home away from home that I’ve known intimately, not in any small part to my hosts Betty and Christoph. It it without hesitation that I can confess this has been the best possible experience I could have hoped for. Germany, a home I am familiar with in ways I could not have touched until this very moment in my life. Today as Betty and I sat at the Hotel Schloss Berg, we practiced my German. I said, over and over and over, “I would like Mint Tea with Rum, Please.” “Ich Hata Gerne Ienen Tee Mit Rum.” I noticed a very handsome man two tables away laughing. “I think he’s laughing at me!” I confide. Indeed, a second later, he says, “Your German is quite good.” I laugh. “Oh?” “Well, the Age makes it difficult.” “DID YOU JUST CALL ME OLD?” I quip. He and Betty both laugh heartily. &#...
Eating Europe
2010-10-27 22:33:00 In the past few months, I’ve painstakingly removed most processed food from our home and slowly moved my food purchases to the Farmer’s Markets and local butchers. Costco is no longer our grocery store, as I refuse to purchase anything with a shelf life longer than a week. This is incovienent, true. But as we’ve discussed, good clean whole food is not only dirty, it is work. Our ancestors lived this truth. Why should we ignore it? Each time I travel to Europe , I lose weight while eating an abundance of wonderful food. I’ve recently spent a week eating like a princess. The food, the markets, the coffee, the beer. BY GOD Europe is a lush place for a woman who is a food hippie. The chicken is all range free. The milk is all hormone free. The eggs, the bread, the chocolate. Everything is without excessive sugar or salt or processed this-and-that. I came home yesterday in a furry to completely change how my family views meals. I’ve prepared home-c...
The B.S. Meter
2010-10-27 22:33:00 It’s in their genes. The minute a baby cry is heard and a man becomes a Dad, the gene “give your child a ton of shit” is activated. It’s fact, Dads all over the world will suddenly say lines like, “If you eat toothpaste, your butt will fall off.” And, “That makes hair grow on your chest.” And, “Stop it goddammit! You’ll fall through the floor!” You might think shit my dad says is a hilarious exaggeration, but I can assure you, it’s shit every dad says. Well, my dad, my father-in-law and my husband at least. I don’t know about your Dad. Maybe he wasn’t an asshole. Or maybe he just didn’t train your B.S. Meter appropriately. Once, after our daughter asked why the grass was the only area with fog in the morning, my husband looked her in the eye and said, “The grass inhales all day and only exhales at night. So in the morning you see the grass morning breath.” She looked at me, thes...
Six. My daughter turned six on Sunday
2010-10-27 22:33:00 My daughter was born after 24 hours of labor, both of us struggling to bring her in to this world. I posted photos via moblog in 2004 to update a small and friendly community waiting her birth. They read the day I went back to the hospital sick with infection and read my struggles of post partum depression. A million years ago, it seems. Or, exactly, six. She’s grown up like this site, in conjunction, both of us changing, growing, learning. She’s the fun one at school. The welcoming one. The one without a clue anyone would think badly about her. She’s moody and sometimes aloof. She’s independent and sole-full. She is kind to her brother, taking care of him in ways he flourishes under. She competes with us telling us she loves us more than. More than the biggest tree, more than the shiniest start, more than the longest song. She is like her mother. She is so very much like her mother that sometimes her mother forgets why she won’t listen. S... More About: Sunday
It’s a coupon, don’t kill me, but I do like coffee
2010-10-27 22:33:00 I don’t normally post coupons and things like that but this deal was a good one. I’m probably going to do this myself. Here is what came to me: Try 2 half pound Boxes of Gevalia Kaffe and get a stainless steel coffeemaker, stainless steel Coffee Carafe and stainless steel tumbler FREE. $168 value, Delivered to your home for $22.95! All Yours to Keep with no further obligation, just for beginning a Gevalia Membership. And y’all? I have to tell you, I’m ALMOST OUT OF COFFEE. And yes, it’s an affiliate link and while I do appreciate that, I’m not only a pusher of caffeinated beverages, I’m also a consumer*. *Just hair club for men? Anyone? More About: Coupon
It’s a three step process: Step 1: Fix. Step 2: It. Step 3: FIXIT.
2010-10-27 22:33:00 I remember when email was new. I remember writing to a friend the summer before my senior year of college, using PINE. When we met again on campus, I blurted out, “OMG! You’re not just ASCII!” (I’ve been a geek for a very long time.) Over the years of blogging and communicating via “social media” and other online forums, it becomes apparent we sometimes forget we’re not just talking to computers. I know early on, I personally made that mistake with a snarky comment not stopping to remember there’s an actual human on the other side of the screen. Teaching online classes at a university taught me how open students will be, for better or worse, when you’re not sitting across from them face to face. We see this over and over again, and some people even shut off their truth to protect themselves from the onslot of criticism. My job includes an online community filled with wonderful people. People who care enough to provide feedback ...
Because this is a blog and I’m hungry
2010-10-27 22:33:00 I’ve started a Liver Cleanse using this PaleoCleanse powder. Instructed by my Natural Path (I’m as hip as someone in California with a shrink and a personal yoga teacher ten years ago) I’m only eating veggies and having two of these here smoothies a day. Smoothie is a stretch, actually. Thick, pasty goo with a hint of grainy sand is more like it. MmMMMM Sand. I sat there, in my doctor’s office, after a week of drinking and carousing with men who can hold their liquor sixteen times better than I can, nodding in agreement when she suggested this liver cleanse. “Your cholesterol is a concern” she reminded me. I nodded again. “It will be intense but it’s really good for your body.” I nodded again. “If you get stuck you can email me, I have another patient on it right now and she just emailed me, on her Day #2, saying she was DYING.” We both laugh. HAHAHA. HAHAHAHA…. The joke is TOTALLY ON ME. It’s Day #... More About: Blog
Lessons I learned while traversing the world {Part 1: Holland}
2010-10-27 22:33:00 Look, I get it. I was gone an entire 7 days. I’ve done Europe a total of three weeks in my life and I’ve only been in places where the water is drinkable and people mainly know English, even if they refuse to let on to that fact. So when I say “World ” here, I mean my very tiny portion of exploration. “World” is relative. Traditionally I’ve enjoyed often moving locations, lands, homes. The year I spent back in Houston as an adult, taught me the value of community. My lesson that year showed me however much I hated living in the flat, humid land, I still met enough people to miss. I felt nearly grateful for this fact: A place is made up primarily of the people who occupy it. It is in this vein I travel and recount my stories accordingly. It’s been said a thousand times, but finding your tribe, your people, is critical. I believe there is a tribe for each of your personas. The people at EECI are my tribe. They are my geeky, hilarious... More About: The World , Part
The One Where I am In Holland
2010-10-27 22:33:00 I’m sitting at a table in the train station I should’ve have been in. Rerouted from Leiden - Munich through Utrech. If this sounds like Greek to you, it sounds like Dutch to me. I do not know Dutch. I’m a fevery, sore throat, flu-like mess. Navigating additional stops and go on the train to see Betty. Feeling a bit like a lame American who only speaks English and one word of Dutch. And while it’s a very useful word (“met” means “with”) it’s not helpful to walk around like Beaker going, “MET MET MET MET” In twenty minutes I’m on a train and then another train and then another and finally a fourth train that will arrive in Munchen at 17:34. I have learned so much this trip so far, have bonded even more with some of the amazing people of ExpressionEngine’s top developers, and learned one very glaring truth: I am not as young as I used to be. OooOOff. I hear them calling my train. I think. I have no ide...
I will never judge someone drinking a single malt at 10 AM at gate S9 ever
More articles from this author:2010-10-27 22:33:00 I admit, I noticed her coffee mug first. I don’t know why, it was a perfectly normal coffee mug. Perhaps it was the size of it (Good for water, I thought) or the way it slanted in the pouch of her backpack (Must be empty, I considered). These are the types of thoughts my mind created to keep me from tearing up. I didn’t want to think about leaving my crying preschooler again. I didn’t want to think about him sobbing and yelling, “I WANT TO GO WIFF YOU!” with his scratchy, sore throat in a fever fit. I didn’t want the Mommy Guilt to hijack my mind. “You are a shitty mother, a selfish mother, a fucking god-awful mother.” So instead, I looked at her coffee cup. At some point I realized I was staring at her. The train whizzed through a tunnel and I saw my reflection. I was staring. I caught myself and looked up to see if she noticed. That’s when I saw her crying. She wiped her nose with a tissue and exhaled steadily. Her eyes were p... More About: Gate , Judge , Drinking , Single 1, 2, 3, 4 |
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