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Can you tell we don't go to church?
2008-03-04 04:02:00
"Mommy, who's Jesus Cripes?" - Joseph
More About: Church

Got books?
2008-03-01 00:24:00
Like kids? Like books? You might want to get in on this. Come on, do it for the kids. And for the books. And for the kids who need books. And for the books who need kids.
More About: Books

Elleisms
2008-02-29 22:10:00
Like most two year olds Elle has developed her own special language. Here are some of my favorite words and sayings of hers complete with translations for those of you not fluent in Ellespeak.I blowfing it. - I'm blowing on this food to cool it off.I sound scary. - I heard a sound that scared me.I look scary. - I see something that scares me.Maga and Paga - Grandma and GrandpaI want something hungry. - I'm hungry.I want something lunch. - I want something to eat.I toot-tooted. - I passed gas.I Stinky Pete. - I have a poopy diaper.I Chickey-poo. - I'm cute.Mama putting in her eyes. - Mama is putting in her contact lenses.I want mentals for my hungry. - I would like some lentils for lunch.

Survivor tidbits
2008-02-29 14:57:00
1. The funniest thing I have seen on Survivor in a while was Ozzy hiding the immunity idol under his straw hat as he talked to Kathy. The hat was way up high on his head and it appeared to have a flowered scarf on it and it was way funnier looking than I can describe here. Trust me.2. Tracy is one smart cookie. She knew exactly what to say to get send Joel into a panic and vote out Mike. I'm bummed that they're mixing up the tribes next week (as per the previews) because I would have like to see how she would have done next week with her original tribe. This tribe mix-up is going to screw with an interesting dynamic. Poo.3. I wonder if anyone will be fooled by Ozzy's "immunity idol". What would you think if you found that stick? I think I would think that someone already found the real idol. If I was Ozzy I would have gotten rid of the cloth the idol was wrapped in and moved that rock to another spot. That's just me though. I don't want to second guess Ozzy though be...
More About: Tidbits

Never ask my husband to buy you maxi pads
2008-02-27 17:20:00
After A was born and I was still in the hospital I asked Jesse to stop by the store and buy me some pads for after I got home. He looked confused and we had the following conversation:Jesse: Don't you already have some at home?Me: Yes, but not enough. Jesse: Really? Are you sure?Me: Yeah, I know that I only have a few at home.Jesse: Hmmmm.Me: Trust me! I know that I need more!Jesse: (skeptically) Oooookaaaay.Me: OH MY GOD! Why are you doubting me on this!?! Wouldn't I know better than you how many pads I have? I think I have a pretty good handle on my current pad inventory! So unless you want me washing out and reusing the few I have then please, for the love of all that is holy, buy me some damned maxi pads!Ok, I didn't say that last part. I'm sure he got the message from the look I shot him though. The look said "Do you really want to argue over feminine hygiene products with me?"Last week I asked Jesse to buy me more pads. This time he didn't argue at all. He went right out ...
More About: Husband , Maxi

Mama malk
2008-02-21 16:33:00
I think I've turned a corner emotion-wise. I haven't cried in the last two days. Every so often I get a little sad because the whole surrogacy is over (I can't wait to do it again) but otherwise I'm starting to feel more "evened out". As long as I'm not pumping I'm happy.Because pumping sucks.Ok, pumping doesn't suck. Blood blisters on your nipples is what sucks. Feeling like you have a rabid weasel attatched to each breast is what sucks. Ending your pumping session and finding that not only are your nipples red and chapped, they're two inches long is what sucks. Washing out the fricken' pumps 100 times a day is what sucks.But pumping is great! And I'm keeping it up because I want the very best for little A ...... and I want some help with losing this baby weight and pumping is really good for that.The one thing I really love about pumping is when Elle wants to sit with me while I do it. (Fun fact - I produce a lot more milk when I pump with her in the room.) We ...
More About: Mama

Just call me Toilet Girl
2008-02-20 00:35:00
toilet girl biggest shit she ever makesThanks Google. You're making the world a better place.
More About: Girl , Toilet , Call

What will make me cry today?
2008-02-18 18:54:00
Ugh, I forgot what a kick in the pants post-partum hormones are. I'm so weepy! Poor Jesse keeps coming across me crying and when he asks what's wrong it's always something like "There's a hairball in the shower drain!" or "I forgot to put salt on my corn!" or "Elle stopped using a sippy cup!"The other day my mom came over to drop off some dinner (because she is the best mom ever and is making dinner for us for every night for a whole week) and I answered the door in tears. She asked what was wrong and the best answer I could give her was "The toilet isn't flushing right!"I'm a mess.But I'm not really. Really I'm feeling pretty good. Sometimes I feel so good that that makes me cry. If I start to think too much about the birth I start to get weepy with happiness.Yesterday I talked on the phone with J and he just went on and on about how much I mean to him and B and how they can never thank me enough for what I've done and how their whole family is so thankful. Finally ...
More About: Today , Make

Wow, that's neat
2008-02-16 17:42:00
You know what feels really great? Walking into the kitchen feeling all big and droopy and post-partumy and finding that your husband's Sports Illustrated has arrived and it's the swimsuit edition.You know what feels even greater? Finding out that your husband went to high school with the girl on the cover.

It's all good
2008-02-15 21:40:00
I was not exepcting to be sitting down and writing out a birth story this soon (I thought I would still be pregnant at this point!) but little A is here and I could not be happier about it. I don't have any pictures to post because I want to respect my IFs privacy but trust me, he is a beautiful boy.I had to be at the hospital at 5 AM to get the induction going. I got about 2 hours of sleep the night before because I was just a bundle of nerves. Unfortunatly the hospital screwed up the order for my pitocin so they didn't even get hooked up until nearly 8. They hooked me up and I dozed off until around 9 when I was able to start feeling contractions. Jesse and I played cards until my doula (Jen) got there at about 10. Then the three of us played cards for the next half hour or so before my contractions suddenly got a lot more intense.My doc checked me and decided to go ahead and break my water at that point. Contractions really got a lot stronger then and all of the sudden I...
More About: Good

Home again
2008-02-15 03:30:00
I'm home!I'm tired and I'm sore and hormones have turned me into a big weepy mess but otherwise I'm really, really good. The past couple of days have been amazing and I can't wait to share more but for now I need to get my butt into the bathtub and then into bed.Thanks for everyone's kind comments and I hope you're all doing well.
More About: Home

Update from Jen
2008-02-13 15:56:00
(This is Jesse - Jen asked me to update)Baby A is here. Born at 6:17pm yesterday. He weighs 7 lbs 6 oz and is 19 in. long. Jen and Baby A are both doing well. We are all proud of Jen - she did it WITHOUT an Epidural!!! She discovered an inner strength she did not know she had.Jen is feeling good but tired. She is planning on being home on Thursday.She aprecaites everyone's support - this has been a wonderful experience.She'll update more when she gets back home.
More About: Update

Let's birth us a baby!
2008-02-12 00:04:00
So a funny thing happened at the doctors office today. My doctor was checking my cervix and it felt like he was in there up to his elbows. He smiled and me and said "Are you doing anything tomorrow?" For a second I thought that he was so impressed with the condition of my cervix that he was asking me out. Because some guys are really into that. Turns out he was asking if I was available to be induced.I'm having a baby tomorrow.Today was my 38 week check up and for the 4th week in a row my blood pressure was a little high. Not dangerously high or high enough to make my doc think I have pre-eclampsia or anything but s little high. That combined with the facts that I've got a good start on dialating and I'm having tons of contractions made the doctor decide to just go ahead and induce me tomrrow.Eek!I have to go in at 5 in the morning tomorrow. The doctor said to expect a good 8-10 hours on the pitocin and then he'll break my water. It'll probably be a bit of a long haul ...
More About: Baby , Birth

The trouble with in-laws
2008-02-07 16:59:00
So I don't think we'll be seeing my father-in-law and his wife for a little while. There are a couple of issues with them that's making me less than eager to spend time with them. The first and more important issue is the way they are with the kids. They really favor Elle. I don't know if it's because they don't get Joseph or don't understand him or just plain old don't like him but whatever it is, that shit ain't cool. I myself grew up with a grandma who favored certain grandkids over others so I know how much that can sting. (Oh, don't get me wrong. I knew my grandma loved me. I also knew that she seemed to like some of my cousins more than me.)So that's the more important issue and it's one that will have to be dealt with at some point. Jesse and I aren't real sure how to handle it though because really, how do you make someone like your kid more? Or at least act like they do?The less important issue (but the one that's more pressing right now) is the way ...
More About: Laws

Womb for rent - the matter of bonding
2008-02-06 18:37:00
So here it is, the absolute number one question I am asked by people about my surrogacy: Will it be hard to give up the baby?My standard answer is pretty much that I can't give up something that's not mine to begin with. I explain to people that a) I have no biological link to the baby and b) this baby was planned, created and conceived entirely for someone else. I never had to make the choice to "give the baby up" (as one would have to with an adoption) because this was never my baby to start with.Most people seem to get it after that but I do get a lot of "I could never do that! I would bond with the baby and it would be to hard!" I get that. I do. I understand that a lot of people would (or at least feel they would) bond too much during the pregnancy to be able to hand the baby over and say goodbye at the end of it all.I'm not one of those people. I haven't bonded with this baby at all during this pregnancy. I have no maternal feelings whatsoever for the baby. I feel ...
More About: For Rent , Matter , Rent

Let's get this show on the road
2008-02-06 18:27:00
I'm ready for this baby to be born now. I'm over 37 weeks so any time would be good.I've been having contractions since Monday evening. I'll have several in an hour and then have a couple of hours with none at all.This morning I lost my mucus plug. I'm sorry, but if I had to see it then you have to hear about it.It's not that I feel a huge urgency to have this baby right now but if I'm going to have all the contractions and discomfort anyway then I would just as soon have it happen now. I don't want to do this labor on/labor off thing for a few days or weeks. Either let me be in labor and let it be real or let me be comfortable and able to sleep at night.Nothing else to report right now.
More About: Show , Road , On The Road , The Road

How I lost 6 pounds in one day
2008-02-04 14:44:00
Remember when Elle "spilled out her mouth" on Wednesday? Well, by Friday afternoon I caught whatever it was that she had.Mine started out a little differently. Around noon on Friday everything in my intestines turned to liquid and started shooting out of me at a high rate of speed. Attractive image, I know. This kept up at a rate of every 15-30 minutes or so. I was pretty amazed since I really hadn't had anything to eat or drink all day.Around eight o'clock I started throwing up. A lot. I would drink a sip of water and throw up several cups worth. It just wouldn't stop and I didn't know where it was all coming from.As a side note, here's how you know you married a good guy: You find youself sitting on the toilet ..... doing what people do on the toilet when they're sick and you're throwing up at the same time. If your husband is a good guy, like mine, he doesn't even flinch. He just stands there and helps you hold your throw-up bucket and brushes your hair out of ...
More About: Lost , Joseph , Jesse

But we only like them as a friend!
2008-01-30 00:36:00
I think J&B's attorney may have made a mistake or two when she was filing the paperwork for the baby's pre-birth order. Today Jesse and I got a letter letting us know that there will be a judicial hearing on the matter of he and I marrying J&B.Um.Hmmmm.Good thing I support gay marrige. Looks like pretty soon I'll be part of one.
More About: Friend

"I spilled out my mouth"
2008-01-29 23:34:00
Is there anything worse than a pukey toddler? If there is I don't want to know about it.Today Elle was happily dancing to the Cars soundtrack and all of the sudden she came over to me and said "My tummy hurts!" before I could even answer her she had done this massive projectile vomiting thing all over the living room, me and herself.It's an interesting moment when something like that happens. Of course your first thought is "Ewwwww! Vomit on my shirt! Get naked as quickly as possible!" At some point though your parenting instinct kicks in and you find yourself calming down your little one and taking off their pukey clothes first. It kind of makes you feel all adult like when you find yourself kneeling in a pile of half digested string cheese and grape juice and saying things like "It's ok sweetie, Mama will clean it up." I felt grossed out but strangely, competent.A little while later I had Elle and myself all cleaned up, a load of laundry going and the living room smelling fresh...
More About: Mouth

Me no likey bloggy
2008-01-28 22:19:00
I haven't been in much of a blogging mood lately. I guess I'm not really in a mood to do much of anything these days. I'm too busy feeling tired and puffy and achy. A few highlights of of the past week were:-Going to Joseph's midyear conference and finding out that my very smart first grader is reading fourth grade material.-Elle moving from her crib into a big girl bed. She made the transition without any problem at all. I on the other hand kept standing in her doorway and weeping about how I no longer have a little baby any more.-My wedding ring has come off. I've developed a major case of sausage fingers and my ring finger was starting to turn blue. Ok, not a highlight but I just felt like sharing.-Going to a fancy-shmancy 5 course dinner where a different wine was served with every course. Everyone in our group of six drank but me. Drunk people are a lot less fun to be around when you're the only sober one. Seriously, I was kind of embarrassed for some of them a couple of ...

Sucky, suckier, suckiest
2008-01-24 17:54:00
Sucky: Waking up at 3AM and finding your eyes glued shut by some sort of sticky, yellow goo.Suckier: Prying your eyes open and seeing that they're both red, swollen and itchy. Pink eye!Suckiest: Remembering that you spend a good chunk of time yesterday teaching your 2 year old to give butterfly kisses and then having her give them to everyone she came across. Sorry folks!

Blog for Choice 2008
2008-01-22 16:04:00
This year's Blog for Choice topic is "Why is it important to vote pro-choice?"Um. Ok. That's kind of a dopey topic, isn't it? I mean, I don't know about anyone else but I know that I vote pro-choice because I am pro-choice. Kind of a no-brainer there.If I go a little deeper into that I would have to make the following confession: Most of the time I'm too cynical to be political. I think the government is too big and too screwed up for it to ever really matter who gets elected to what anymore. I can't get too into throwing my support behind any one candidate because I don't think any one candidate is going to be able to fix or change things for the better.I also find myself unable to align with any certain political party. I'm a little too conservative to be a liberal and way to liberal to be a conservative. Independent parties leave me frightened and confused.There is never a candidate that I agree all the way with on every issue so in the end I just have to pick one issue t...
More About: 2008

Too clever for his own good
2008-01-22 03:55:00
Jesse and Joseph were playing Super Mario Galaxy together tonight. It drives me crazy to listen to the two of them play video games together because they both get so frustrated and crabby. Tonight I'm glad I was in the room when they were playing though because I got to hear the following exchange.Joseph: Daddy! You're not doing this right!Jesse: I'm doing the best I can Joseph!Joseph: (in a rude, sarcastic tone) I'm sure you are.Jesse: Hey! I don't like that tone Joseph.Joseph: (in a high falsetto) I'm sure you are!Then I laughed so hard that I had a contraction and Jesse got crabby at me for "making things worse". I don't care. it was funny.
More About: Jesse , Good , Clever

Princess McQueen
2008-01-21 04:16:00
Me: That's a pretty crown you have on Elle . Are you a princess?Elle: No.Me: Are you a queen?Elle: (puzzled look) No! That's Ka-chow!You might not get this if you aren't as big a Cars fan as my kids are.Speaking of Cars, you know what scene always makes me kind of sad? The one where McQueen comes up on Doc racing through the desert. Something about Doc trying to relive his glory days in the middle of nowhere makes me kind of weepy. I'm probably just a big sap but I think it's a really well done scene. Is that just me?
More About: Princess

Get my agent on the phone!
2008-01-20 19:16:00
Here is an interesting (I think so anyway) article about the surrogacy agency that I'm with. It's the hippest, most "in" thing I've ever been a part of.
More About: Agent , Phone

No final conclusion either way
2008-01-16 21:22:00
Evidence that Elle might be a genius:Yesterday she put together a 24 piece puzzle all by herself.Evidence that Elle might not be a genius:This morning I caught her eating snow from off of the bottom of her shoes. Twice.
More About: Final

Average just isn't good enough
2008-01-16 19:16:00
Naral has released a report on the status of women's reproductive rights in the United States. The report gives a state-by-state breakdown of the laws affecting women?s ability to choose abortion, access emergency contraception, get insurance coverage for reproductive health services and several other other things. They give each state a grade that corresponds to these issues.Minnesota somehow managed to score an C+ in spite of the fact that 95% of Minnesota counties have no abortion providers. That's kind of mind boggling to me.As a full grown adult I take for granted that I have control over my own body and the decisions concerning my own medical care. I assume that if I ever find myself facing an unwanted pregnancy I would have access to a full range of choices. After reading this report I find myself feeling a little less secure about those rights. It disturbs me to think of women losing their right to safe and legal abortions. If it disturbs you too and this is an issue...
More About: Good , Average

A big milestone
2008-01-15 17:49:00
Well, I'm at that point in the pregnancy where sneezing makes me pee my pants. Wheeeeeeee! (heh)
More About: Milestone

Bleh
2008-01-15 15:02:00
Me. Joseph . Flu. Vomit everywhere. Want to die.

Let's try this again shall we?
2008-01-14 15:13:00
All right, last week sucked. Let's keep our fingers crossed that this week is somewhat better. We're already off to a rip roarin' start with Joseph staying home from school sick but I still have faith that it will get better.My birth plan meeting was on Saturday. It went pretty well. B and J didn't have any really unreasonable requests and they mostly seemed pretty ok with the way I wanted things done. One thing I talked about that I could tell really bothered J was when I said I didn't want constant monitoring. Anyone who has ever given birth in a hospital knows about those stupid monitors they make you wear. They're itchy and uncomfortable and they keep you somewhat restricted in your movement. When I was in labor with Elle I hated them so much that I wanted to rip them off. What I didn't know at the time was that if all is well and the baby is tolerating labor well there's really no reason to keep them on non-stop. The good news is that when I discussed this with the birt...