The Bean BlogThe Bean BlogTrying to stay sane while raising five kids, being a good wife, working full-time and going to school part-time. Articles
I think this whole argument made me delusional
2008-07-19 12:24:00 The other day we were driving along in our automobile and the kids were in the back doing what they always do; arguing. I wasn’t listening at first, but apparently the fight was about Power Rangers. Caleb swears the Power Rangers have a sword. But Skyler is pretty sure they don’t. Caleb: Yes, they do. Skyler: No, they don’t. Caleb: Yes, they do. Skyler: No, they don’t. Well you get the picture. Then Spencer piped in with, “Skyler, do you even watch Power Rangers?” Skyler: Well I’ve seen it. Caleb: Well I watch it all the time so I should no. Skyler: Well I think you are delusional from watching too much Power Rangers. Caleb: I am not delusional. Skyler: Do you even know what delusional means? Caleb: Umm…Mom, what does “delusional” mean? Me: I’m not in this argument. Just leave me out of it. Caleb: Well we just need to know what delusional means. Me: It means crazy. Caleb: (looking at Skyler) What?!? You calling me cr...
Foggy Albuterol brain
2008-07-18 12:24:00 I’ve been having some not so smart moments lately. I blame my asthma. All that Ventolin has gone straight to my brain and killed off some brain cells. First, my bluetooth headset died a sad, watery death. The kids and I were at the pool (as we are at least three times a week). I took off my headset in preparation for heading in to the pool to hang out with the kids. I lathered each of the kids up with sunscreen and they all ran off. Then I lathered myself up and I realized I had nobody to get my back. So I grabbed my headset (because it was easier than searching through my bag for my phone) and called Lee. He was supposed to be meeting us at the pool and I wanted to know how close he was; if I should wait for him to come slick up my back with sunscreen or if I should just go ahead and perform some contortionist routine to try to reach every inch. I was hoping for the former because there were a lot of people at the pool and god forbid I look like some weirdo trying to save mys...
Some news and some whine
2008-07-17 01:17:00 So today is Wednesday and normally we would be enjoying Working Wednesday, but not today. Because today…SURPRISE…it’s moved to a new site. I’m now writing over at Iowa Moms along with a bunch of other wonderful Iowans. Come on over and check it out. I’ll be spilling all about balancing work and family and whatever else pops in to my head. Be sure to go back daily. Since we aren’t talking about working today let’s talk about what everybody else is talking about; BlogHer. While thousands of women (and a few men) were at BlogHer last year, Mrs. Flinger and I vowed nothing would keep us from the big conference next year. Well here we are at next year and I’m not going. (But Mrs. Flinger is so at least one of us kept up our end of the bargain.) I thought I was ok with my decision not to go this year. But now that everybody is talking about it I’m kicking myself. Decisions are so hard. Be a good mom and spend time with the kids or go...
Does Wall-E hate fat people?
2008-07-15 19:28:00 Oh for crying out loud. Apparently there is a big controversy over the Disney/Pixar movie Wall-E. I guess some overweight people are upset about the way Wall-E portrays fat people. Give me a break. If you haven’t seen the movie let me give you a run down. It’s a cute love story between Wall-E, an old robot who was left on Earth to clean up the mess left by people, and Eve, a new robot Wall-E unexpectedly runs in to. The premise of the movie is that people are not taking care of their planet and eventually it gets so bad it can no longer sustain life. Since people can’t live on Earth they are all hanging out in a spaceship. On the spaceship technology takes over and people start to live a very sedentary lifestyle. Nowhere in the movie did they make fun of fat people. They did not make the people seem like bad people. In fact it was just the opposite. The people were all very nice people. They were just average people who were lured in by the power of technology and ...
Pardon my fast food rant. It’s late. And I’m hungry.*
2008-07-15 00:07:00 What ad agency is Burger King relying on for their current ad campaign? The last few campaigns have been downright disgusting. There was the Western Whopper which makes you grow a mustache. Who in the hell wants a mustache from eating a burger? That so does not make me want to run right out and get me one of those. And now they have these infuriating commercials for the Steakhouse burger. Apparently you have to do something exception to be deserving of a Steakhouse burger or else you get slapped or called names. Seriously?!? It’s a fucking hamburger from a fast food joint. It costs what $4.59 when you buy it with a large fry and drink. Give me a break. I stopped eating at Hardee’s because they gear their advertising towards men. Which would be fine if they didn’t also alienate women in the process. But their advertising made it very clear that they just want big, hungry men to come eat at their restaurant. So I was more than happy to let them have them. I wonder ...
Sunday Linky Love
2008-07-14 00:19:00 Just when i was starting to scream “that dirty bastard…” A little time management tip. What?!? There are people who have never heard of Andrew McCarthy? A conversation with her ass. And her asses response. Apparently Dockers, JC Penneys and TLC Marketing all suck big time. And TLC Marketing’s customer service is really, really bad. Rockstar Mommy is back. Well not really, but sort of. I know some of these Muffia members. And I hate them. I have so been there. In fact I was just there last week. Aren’t kids fun? Always remember your blog can be used against in a court of law. Still looking for a way to help out the Iowa flood victims, buy a t-shirt. © 2004-2008 The Bean Blog - All Rights Reserved. Visit The Bean Blog for more great content. Follow me on Twitter @ thebeanblog or on Plurk at thebeanblog.Find me on Facebook and LinkedIn.---Related Articles at The Bean Blog:Sunday Linky LoveSunday Linky Lo...
Growing up right before my eyes
2008-07-12 14:00:00 We’ve spent a lot of time at the pool this summer. We got pool passes and dang it we’re going to use them. In June we went to Chicago to visit my mom. While the kids were doing their very favorite activity ever in Chicago…swimming in the pool at Grandma’s apartment… (I know, you’d think it would be Navy Pier or Shedd’s Aquarium or even Great America. Nope. Their favorite thing is Grandma’s pool.) So anyway, while in the pool at Grandma’s house, Caleb got brave enough to swim on his own…without a noodle or holding on for dear life to either the edge of the pool or a family member. By the second day he had this swimming thing down. He wasn’t an Olympic swimmer or anything, but he got from point A to point B and he was pretty darn proud of himself. When we got home and headed back out to our city pool he kept at it. Every day he went a little bit farther in to the deep end, practicing his new swimming skills. He&rsquo...
Can you *cough* hand me that *hack* fax please *sniffle*?
2008-07-09 13:36:00 When I first started working at MCI (more than 10 years ago) we got 30 sick days a year. Yes you read that right. 30! That’s a lot. Most people (at least those who were responsible employees) did not use the full 30 days each year unless they had a medical emergency or gave birth to a child. We got 30 sick days a year, but our short term disability was less than desirable so we needed those 30 days to be able to stay home after surgery or baby birthing. When Worldcom bought us our benefits suffered slightly. Our annual sick days decreased from 30 days to 12 days. Although not 30, it was still a pretty impressive number of sick days. Our short term disability did not change. We still had to pay a small fee out of each paycheck to receive 66 2/3rd of our salary while we were on leave. And we only got that after we expired all of sick and vacation time. Which I never understood because why would they require a person to use all of their paid time when they had a baby. An infant w...
Always read the small print…or why I hate Vonage
2008-07-08 23:09:00 I’ve mentioned before that we have had Vonage phone service. Yesterday we said goodbye to VoIP and got a landline installed again. It was part of a package deal. We also switched our internet and cable TV. Now we have just one bill for all three. But that wasn’t the only reason we switched. A long time ago I had MCI’s Neighborhood phone service. We got it right when bundling local and unlimited long distance was the cool thing to do. We were so excited to get unlimited long distance for the low, low price of $45.99 a month so we signed right up. And then the rates went up, up and up. Even with my $25 employee discount my bill was almost $40 a month. It was ridiculous. Then Vonage came along and promised unlimited long distance plus some international calling for just $24.99 a month. That was cheaper than what were paying so we were lured in by their charm and big promises. Last September we signed right up and didn’t look back. We had problems starting from d...
Know what the best part of having kids is?
2008-07-08 05:00:00 Eating out. Before kids we would go out to dinner. Have some quiet conversation. Enjoy every morsel of our food. And leave the restaurant hand-in-hand with big, loving smiles on our faces. Now, with kids, we eat as quickly as we can having no clue what the food tastes like. We rarely talk to each other. Instead we spend much of the meal saying things like “get out from under the table” and “keep your hands to yourself” and “no you cannot have dessert because you haven’t eaten a single bite of your chicken fingers.” And we leave the restaurant in a jog hoping we can get out before anybody notices the mess we left behind. And tonight was no exception. But tonight we got some added fun. I don’t know what the boys were talking about, but all of a sudden. Out of the blue. Caleb yells out, while laughing hysterically, “you just said ‘up your butt and around the corner.’” And just in case the old couple across the rest... More About: Kids , Part
Sunday Linky Love
2008-07-07 05:38:00 There was not one, but two 4th of July babies in the blogosphere. Momma Says the F Word had a boy just one minute in to the holiday. He’s a cutie patootie. And the Creep has a new baby sister; the Twerp (a.k.a Maggie). A big 9 pound 3 ounce girl. And Metalia finally had some time to tell us her birth story. Cynical Dad is running for congress. With Kermit the Frog as his running mate? I’m not the only one giving hair to Lock of Love . I can barely walk in flip flops so it’s no surprise to me that flip flops cause car accidents. Suburban Scrawl has some fond (well mostly) 4th of July memories. Are you a joiner? Or is the thought of singing “Row Row Row Your Boat” in the pool with a bunch of 2-year-olds like the four corners of hell to you? Instead of spewing more bloggy hate, donate to those in need. Speaking of manners on the internet, some people still don’t get it. Dad Gone Mad is educational? He’s just as shocked as we are. What? Gay marri... More About: Sunday , Linky
4th of July family time
2008-07-05 20:37:00 Our 4th of July usually starts with us getting up early to run in the big race downtown followed by us filling our tummies at the pancake breakfast. Then we come home, get in to our red, white and blue garb, spike the boys’ hair with colored gel, and paint the girls’ toenails with a patriotic theme. In the afternoon we head over to my aunt and uncle’s house to celebrate my cousin’s birthday. And we end the night downtown watching the fireworks over the river. None of that happened yesterday. Now that my cousin is an adult and moved out of his family home there was no party. Since downtown is still recovering from the flood and there is a ton of cleanup going on there was no race, no pancake breakfast and no fireworks. And since we were to exhausted from swimming we didn’t paint our nails or spike our hair. A little part of me is heartbroken that we weren’t able to follow tradition this year. But then another part of me is yelling, “stop bein... More About: Family , Time , Family Time
Vonage on crack
2008-07-04 16:46:00 The 4th of July is usually one of my favorite holidays. We have a lot of family traditions for the 4th of July holiday. Our cities Freedom Festival usually has a ton of activities scheduled for the holiday. There is the Red, White and Blue parade, the Balloon Glow, the annual kids race plus the 5K and 8K, the pancake breakfast and, of course, the cit fireworks display. Because of the flooding three weeks ago, all of that has been postponed until Labor Day. Since downtown was completely underwater and is now trying to dig out, we cannot have our usual festivities. It’s so sad. But one of our traditions was still on. Yesterday we had our annual family picnic at my grandma’s tree. And this year the whole family was able to come back (except for one of my cousins). My grandpa has been having some health problems, and was actually not feeling that great yesterday, but at least we were all together yesterday. It was wonderful to see the whole family again. A couple days ago my... More About: Vonage , Crack
Getting high at the hospital
2008-07-03 04:10:00 I’m not a person who does well on medication. If there’s a side effect I feel it. When I take cold medicine I instantly have medicine head. You know the saying “high as a kite?” That’s me on cold medicine. Nyquil completely knocks me out. Within a half hour of downing a shot of Nyquil I’m out cold (no pun intended). And then I can’t get out of bed in the morning. Apparently I get this affliction for pain medication from my grandmother. Grandma cannot hold her morphine. My grandma had one of her hips replaced Monday morning. She’s been hanging out at the hospital ever since. Last night the morphine really got to her and she got a little loopy. She was convinced five of the nurses took her home with them last night. She said, “I was trying to figure out why they all lived in the same place.” Turns out they actually just took her to get a chest x-ray. Last night my aunt left the hospital around 5:30pm for supper. She returned ... More About: Hospital , High
A day of makeovers
2008-07-02 05:58:00 There were a lot of big changes at our house today. First the backyard got a makeover. This morning my backyard looked like this: Then this big bobcat entered the yard. And now my backyard looks like this: We live on a hill. Actually we live on the side of a hill. Our yard is so bumpy I practically break an ankle every time I step outside. We’ve been wanting to level our backyard for years. The last two years we’ve put our pool in the front yard because there was no even semi-level place in the backyard. It’s kind of embarrassing flashing the neighborhood and every passer-byer from the pool in the front yard. I’m pretty sure the neighbors are sick of looking at my saggy ass and droopy boobies. Lee talked to his friend about coming over to level our yard a long time ago. In fact I think he first talked to him last year. He kept meaning to come over, but he’s a busy guy. With lots of excuses. Yesterday I answered Lee’s phone when Roger called. I ...
Sunday Linky Love
2008-06-30 02:21:00 Have you seen those green bags on TV? Ever wondered if they actually work? Pumpkin Delight tried them out and apparently the green bags do keep produce fresh, but not as long as they claim. A garden to attract humans. This is so true. Why can’t bloggers just get along? I read Dooce, Amalah, Bossy and Mrs. Fussypants and I love them all. And I can assure you they all have their own unique voice. Speaking of fighting within the mommyblogger community, Queen of Spain wrote a great Open Letter to Mommybloggers. With all this fighting I think we could all use a strawberry margarita with a side of humor (and a lot of cursing). Or maybe you like your margaritas frozen…on a stick. Popsicles for adults. Or if you don’t want that much tequila, maybe you want to try out some of the smoothie recipes from our Weary Parent Camp. It’s amazing how different Friday nights are after kids. I joined the itty bitty titty committee a long time ago. Unfortunately I was there even... More About: Love , Sunday , Linky
Wii are so fit
2008-06-29 05:09:00 Guess what we got? Finally! A Wii Fit. They are so hard to find. I wish I would have pre-ordered it on Amazon, but I stupidly thought I could just run out to my local Target and get one after they came out. I was wrong. We have looked everywhere. I’m on a mailing list on bestbuy.com, walmart.com and circuitcity.com to notify me the second they have them in stock. About a week ago I got an email from circuitcity.com and by the time I went to their website to buy it they were already out again. It’s just insane. Every time we go to the store we ask if they have them in back, knowing full well that they don’t. Each time we’ve walked out of the store Wii Fit-less. I’ve been cursing everybody who already has one. Those lucky bastards. But now that’s all changed. One of our local movie theaters offers free movies every Wednesday and Thursday. This week’s movie was Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium. The kids have already seen it, but they were w...
Arizona helping Iowans
2008-06-27 05:05:00 I mentioned before that Lee’s aunt owns a restaurant in the Phoenix area (it’s actually in Mesa) called the Iowa Cafe. Well this Saturday she is holding a fundraiser from 6am to 4pm. She is giving the whole day’s sales to flood victims back here in Iowa. She’s having a meal special. Breakfast or lunch for just $5. And she has a great menu full of all the goodies we eat here in Iowa like maid-rites and big ‘ol breaded tenderloins. Yesterday Lee contacted Kurt Warner’s foundation to see if they could help. And they donated a signed helmet. I believe there are some other items to be auctioned off as well. We have friends who have lost every single thing in their home. Their baby’s crib. Their most prized possessions. Their first home as a family. Other friends needs to replace all their kitchen appliances, their furnace, their water heater, their washer and dryer and their electrical box…and FEMA is giving them just $3000. They were outs... More About: Arizona
Men are stubborn part 2
2008-06-27 04:40:00 Speaking of stubborn men, or at least my stubborn man. Not only can men not ask for directions, but they also refuse to accept help with their cell phones. What’s up with that? The other night Lee and I were laying in bed. I was reading (this fabulous book by Jen Lancaster which you should totally buy and read because it will make you snort milk out your nose it’s so funny) and Lee was playing with his new cell phone. It’s been more than two years since Lee upgraded to his Motorola Razr. A phone he had very bad luck with. He had that thing in the US Cellular shop so many times they started to recognize him. Eventually he convinced them to give him a new replacement phone. Not long after that Lee had yet another water accident with his phone. But this time it wasn’t a raft ride. This time it was the washing machine. I swear he’d lose his ass if it wasn’t attached to his legs. So we had to pay $50 for a replacement phone (because we have insurance o... More About: Part
Weekend exhaustion, or Why my Sunday Linky Love is late
2008-06-23 12:42:00 It was a long, exhausting weekend. On Thursday we left behind water restrictions, the smelly, moldy river and spotty internet service to head east toward Chicago to spend the weekend with my mom. Here in Iowa, where we are still recovering from the worst flooding ever, we are conserving water. I have to brush my teeth ... More About: Love , Sunday , Weekend , Late , Linky
And the winner is?.
2008-06-23 11:59:00 I didn’t forget about my birthday contest. I just got really busy (read: lazy) and didn’t choose a winner yet. But that all changed about two minutes ago. With the help of random.org (since we left Keaton in Chicago and he is usually my official name picker), the winner is… Smilf. Congrats Smilf! I’ll email you asking ... More About: Winner
Should a woman be able to use fertility treatments to get pregnant if she a
2008-06-21 01:10:00 How would I ever come up with ideas to blog about if it wasn’t for Parenting magazines “Mom Debate” column? In this month’s issue mom’s were asked the following question: Should a woman be able to use fertility treatments to get pregnant if she already has kids? Julia Schuck from Rolla, MO took the words right out ... More About: Treatments , Pregnant , Woman , A Woman
Why are men so darn stubborn?
2008-06-18 00:21:00 Lee hasn’t been to the doctor in years. He basically has to be on his deathbed before he’ll even consider having a conversation with a doctor. I usually end up having to drag him to the emergency room with a 104 degree temperature and delirium because he’s to stubborn to go to the doctor sooner. For ...
Next thing you know I?ll be giving him razor blades to play with
2008-06-17 00:56:00 About a week ago we took Skyler, Spencer and Caleb out to dinner to a steak restaurant. About 20 minutes after we were seated Caleb announced he had to go to the bathroom. Like many six-year-olds he typically has to go the bathroom several times during the course of a meal out in public. Getting ... More About: Play , Blades , Giving , Thing , Razor
Sunday Linky Love: The Iowa Flood Edition
2008-06-15 15:39:00 This week’s Sunday Linky Love is brought to you by the letter F, as in Fuck You Mother Nature. And the number 24,000…the number of people homeless in our town because of the floods this week. Some more numbers for this week are…. 9.2: The number of MILES affected by the flood. 1300: The number of CITY BLOCKS ... More About: Iowa , Red Cross
Help a mom out
2008-06-14 17:38:00 In the hours we were without eletricity the last two days we had two bags of chicken breast thaw. So we need to eat chicken every day for the next week. Here’s where you come in. I need some recipes. My kids will likely get tired of chicken/veggie soup and chicken and rice after about ...
Just when you think it can?t get any worse?it does
2008-06-14 01:07:00 In my last post I talked about how devastating the flood was to our town. Now, two days later, I can say that was nothing. Today we can’t get anywhere near where I was at when I took those pictures on Wednesday. Now businesses are completely under water. Houses are covered to the roofs. Cars ...
Turn around, don?t drown
2008-06-11 23:50:00 Have you heard about the flooding in the Midwest ? Our motto these days is “Turn Around. Don’t Drown.” I didn’t make it up. The news people made it up. And clearly they need to hire some creatives because that is just ridiculous. That little ditty is supposed to remind people not to drive or walk ... More About: Dude
We interrupt this Working Wednesday for my birthday (& a contest for you)
2008-06-11 11:57:00 They say its your birthday. It’s my birthday too. And I’m giving away stuff. Just for you. Ok, this is why I’m not a song writer. But I am giving away a $25 gift certificate to Build-A-Bear. Get your daughter (or son) the new Tropical Hello Kitty. Skyler has it and she loves it. She sleeps with it every night. ... More About: Contest , Randomness , Birthday , Wednesday , Working
Sunday Linky Love
More articles from this author:2008-06-09 03:52:00 Amalah’s having a boy. Congrats! Did you enter a guess in Sunshine’s tattoo quiz? She’s announced the winner, given the correct answers and many of us shared our tattoo stories. We’re you able to keep up during the last several months where we chose a democratic candidate? Do you need a refresher? Well relive the democratic primaries ... More About: Love , Sunday , Linky 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 |
|
 |
|
 |
