Sparks and Butterflies Sparks and Butterflies Caffeine from above ~ Coffee from below.... I'd sure like some dull! Articles
Thursday
2008-07-19 13:15:00 It’s Friday morning… and it’s currently 6:23, so I’m not entirely coherent. I’m not going to give a blow by blow of the sessions themselves, but everything else, I want to record my thoughts on. No pictures, ’cause, well, I haven’t brought out my camera yet. Last night I went to the newbie mixer. I had a drink, and met two lovely ladies in line, Kelly and Jennifer. Unfortunately it was really loud, and we didn’t exchange cards, so I never caught their blogs to link them. While I saw Mocha Mama… I didn’t have the balls to talk to her. I was supposed to meetup with GeekMommy, and I kind of know what she looks like, but when scanning I couldn’t find her. I quickly grew overwhelmed with the loudness and the people I didn’t know, so I left and headed up to the People’s Party. When I got there, I got myself some swag, and got myself another drink. I was on a mission to meet Megan. I’m a reader of... More About: Thursday
People Watching
2008-07-17 18:06:00 I’m sitting at the airport, waiting for boarding. Next to me is a man with a braid, and real birkenstocks. I had forgotten about those. I recently saw a gentleman get off a plane who looked exactly like he came out of an 80’s hair band. Long hair, black clothes. He walked with a limp, and had the COOLEST silver tipped cane. Tired travelers. Tired kids. Parents dragging. I have to say though, this is the best, quickest time I’ve ever had. I was the only one in check in, baggage check, and security, so went right through. I love the Burbank Airport, I sincerely do. I wish I could always fly out of here. More About: People , Watching , People watching
My Pain in the Neck
2008-07-16 14:40:00 The evidence that Logan, is indeed, a pain in the neck. I took this yesterday morning, while it was still dark. The flash didn’t make him even stir. That, right there, is MY side of the bed. The pillow on the floor to the side is mine. It goes, you know, where his feet are. Clearly, at some point, this was preferable to his own bed. More About: Pain , Neck
Want to Reach Me?
2008-07-15 14:20:00 If you are going to BlogHer, and want to meetup at some point - or at least just meet - send me an email at sparksfley at gmail dot com. We’ll exchange numbers. And here’s just a roundup of the places you can see my updates while I’m at the conference. I do, indeed, plan on taking my laptop - but I’ve never taken my laptop outside of the house (Betsy is a virgin) so, we’ll see how this goes: Here of course Flickr Twitter email - sparksfley at gmail dot com I have various other addresses and social addictions - but those above are the ones I’ll probably be using. More About: Reach
Change.
2008-07-15 09:29:00 I hate it. Change . I’m terrible at it. At the same time, if a decision is made, I want it done. I don’t want little steps. I don’t want the transition. I just want it done. I’m lucky. I have this man, Poe, my husband… When I say I want to do something he always backs me up 100%. I know a lot of people don’t have that. But I also know that now is not the right time. I don’t have the necessary steps in place. To make the changes now would be incredibly immature, just because I want it done. Sucks to be a grownup. I feel as though I’m on this huge precipice. All around me is sky and horizon. All I have to do is jump. But I have to wait for the sign - the sign that says, “Now. Now you jump.” I just hope that I recognize the voice.
The Heavy
2008-07-10 10:49:00 I don’t really want to go all heavy right now, with BlogHer prep and anticipation at it’s peak. ‘Cause it is for me too! I’m excited, and anxious, and anticipatory - and quite frankly need to get away. But. But. I’m waiting. You see, in a few days we’ll find out what, if anything, is causing my mother to jerk uncontrollably. She had two tests, a cat scan/MRI, and an EEG. We’re waiting on those results. In the first, the tech asked her, while he was scanning her, “And does your doctor think you have a brain tumor?” And during the EEG, “I don’t like the looks of this.” And so we wait. I’ve talked to Poe. Whatever the results are, I’m going to BlogHer. Good? Great I’ll get the break I need. Bad? I’ll need the last harrah for myself. I realize it seems morbid. But when you’re part of the sandwich generation - you have to think morbid. My mother has almost d... More About: Heavy
Disclaimers are Powerful Tools
2008-07-09 13:23:00 So - I wrote a post, my BlogHer Disclaimer, telling you all about my “quirks.” So far, it’s my most popular post to date. I have never gotten so many comments on one post before. I don’t know if you all found me somewhere - not seeing a new link, nor am I seeing my post as featured on BlogHer - let me know? But, what’s happened is, people are posting their OWN disclaimers - and I just think that’s so cool. So I thought I’d point you back there, and tell you to read the comments. More About: Tools
BlogHer Prep
2008-07-08 14:32:00 OK… The preparations are underway. I’ve mentioned a haircut, and mani pedi. I bought a dress just in case I want to dress up for a party. I’ve got business cards. I’ve exchanged numbers with someone I might babysit for so she can actually speak in her panel (YAY Squoosh baby!) I still have to decide which panels I’ll actually be attending. And finally… If you want to meet up, meet me, etc… Please email me at sparksfley at gmail dot com so we can exchange cells. More About: Prep
The Block
2008-07-07 22:23:00 I have writer’s block. There. I said it. Nothing dramatic. I just can’t think of a thing to say. Prep is underway for BlogHer. There will be a haircut involved, and a manicure and pedicure - since I can’t seem to do those things without an excuse. Children are being raised, parents coddled, marriages stroked. And just… Life. Nothing to write home about. Heh. And I’m drained. Procrastinating on things that should be taken care of - I just pretend aren’t there. Perhaps an unintentional summer break? I don’t know. All I know is, I’m quiet right now. More About: Block
BlogHer Disclaimer
2008-07-01 13:28:00 So I’m going to BlogHer ‘08 (woot and yay!) in two - TWO - weeks. I have never met a blogger in person before. I’m especially nervous about this. I’m anxious about the social thing. (what if no one likes me waaaaah) So, figured the best way to attack this was to list my flaws so you won’t be shocked or surprised. heh. You probably wouldn’t have been anyway. But this is my way of attacking my anxiety head on. Here I am, take me or leave me, with all my flaws. If I’m drinking, I talk. If I’m nervous, I talk. Drinking and nervous? Oh dear. Also - when I’m nervous I start talking louder and louder. The problem is - I was (literally) dropped on my head too many times as a child and it effected my hearing. I actually cannot hear myself talk. So, while I may be talking louder, I still can’t hear a difference in my head. If I’m passionate or excited about something, I start repeating myself. I’... More About: Disclaimer
Toes are Useless
2008-06-27 19:22:00 I know I said I had a BlogHer disclaimer coming… Instead I’m going to tell you about my morning. ‘Cause where else am I going to complain? We’ve been having issues the last week with our water heater. As in it deciding not to heat water whenever it wants to. It’s a game now! Ohhhh Hot Water! Nope never mind. Add showers, baths, dishes, and laundry - and the points that the heater is making in this game is just nuts! So - Poe informed me this morning that there was no hot water, so I would need to shower at my parents house. Ugh. I love them, but somewhere along the line they turned into older folks, and they have lots of stuff. Everywhere. In the shower, out of the shower, on every surface. Anyway - I’m in the shower shampooing my hair, soapy and all that, and I bumped into something and it flew off the wall and onto the 4th toe of my left foot. My parents were still sleeping and so I did a very soapy silent scream. And that... More About: Useless
New Game in Town
2008-06-27 13:27:00 First - while I went off the deep end a tad bit, my attitude is improved. Nothing’s changed, mind you, but my attitude has improved. Second - You still have until Monday night to get a free $50 to start your own SmartyPig account! Third - I’ve decided to turn my social anxiety in a post just for you. Look for my BlogHer 2008 disclaimer, coming soon, and find out about all my foibles and idiosyncrasies ahead of time. And finally Fourth - I have a new gig. You’ve probably seen it around the blogs lately, and for good reason. You’re looking at an editor at Blog Nosh Magazine. Megan Jordan had this crazy idea - and has taken it to great heights. What is Blog Nosh Magazine? We are an online magazine featuring the best archived content from primarily personal blogs, spotlighting a cross-section of topics and perspectives. New posts daily. For bloggers, if it has fallen off of your front page and you know it deserves more time and exposure, we are your ideal r... More About: Game , Town
Giveaway
2008-06-26 09:00:00 Just a little heads up… If you were ever interested in Smarty Pig, I’m giving away $50 to start your own account!
The Stuggle to Keep On
2008-06-24 10:59:00 While I technically have more time, now that my mother is out of the hospital… I’ve struggled greatly with all of my blogging activities - be it writing here or at Butterviews, or my editing, or anything really, except for reading others. I’ve been trying to come up with a why. The basic why is I’m struggling. Greatly. I want to be home, I need to be home, and I think God wants me home. But I’m not home. And so I’ve been struggling - emotionally, spiritually, and practically with that fact. I’ve never been one to wait things out. I’ve no patience. Once a decision is made, I can never seem to understand, “Now isn’t the time, ” or “Wait,” or “in the future.” I’ve made a decision, so why can’t I follow through? It’s made it very very difficult to go to work every day. I’m physically exhausted. Nothing seems to be getting done anywhere! At work, at h...
Out of ICU
2008-06-19 11:49:00 Well, my mother is out of ICU. She’s not out of danger, and she’s not getting better, but she’s no longer getting worse. Posting is likely to still be light, as I get all my ducks in a row, and get back on my feet with everything that went by the wayside. Stay tuned.
Be back soon…
2008-06-15 01:06:00 My mom is in the ICU. Be back soon. Can’t really concentrate right now. More About: Back
Conversations with an 8 Year Old
2008-06-10 11:15:00 Joseph (after bath): When can I sleep naked in my own bed? Poe: dear caught in headlights Poe: Jeopardy theme music plays Poe: lightbulb appears over head Poe: You can sleep naked in your own bed if and when you feel comfortable running into the street naked if there’s a fire. silence Joseph: Oh. More About: Year
Update on the Tum Tum, er, Stomach
2008-06-06 16:38:00 I went to the doctor for my three month follow up visit. The meds are working to control things = good. The meds if forgotten means noticeable symptoms = bad. I’ve had a fever for every single appointment = bad. So, basically, I’ve been living with a low grade fever for 6 months (unknown cause). The medications are doing they’re job, but not fixing things. He thinks that I might have a bacterial infection in my stomach causing all of this, however, I tested negative for the H. Pylori. He said that there are others, so it still may be a factor. I’m starting up two really strong antibiotics at the same time for two weeks, and keeping my other meds the same. Another three month follow up. If at that time nothing’s changed, and there’s a noticeable difference when I forget my meds, then it’s another endoscopy for me to see if the hernia and ulcers have gotten bigger. However the whole fever thing? May indeed be why I hit a wall at ... More About: Stomach , Update
New Giveaway - Primo Water
2008-06-03 22:26:00 There’s a new Giveaway over at Butterviews! Enter for your chance at a free case of water! More About: Water , Primo
Intriguing
2008-06-03 18:50:00 My best friend just called me this morning. Next year, she wants me to become a partner with her in a franchise. It’s an intriguing possibility. I definitely could save the money up. That’s not the issue. Do I want to be part of this franchise… Which has NOTHING to do with blogging or the online world - except in a marketing capacity. Do I want to be in business with my friend? Do I want to attempt this? Can I do it and quit my job? is this something I just want to say JUMP? I don’t know. I’m praying. Poe’s praying. There’s a lot of uncertainty in the air at my house. The winds of change on the horizon I guess. I just wonder how it’ll all work together, you know? But on the other hand, I know the absolute end of the story, so. So. Perhaps this is my chance to go home sooner? But to do that and have it fail, when I had “security” in my job? But then again - my kids need me? I don’t have t...
Simplification
2008-05-29 18:03:00 Despite appearances, I haven’t fallen off the face of the earth. I’m merely taking stock. I fled two blogging jobs that weren’t compensating properly for the amount of time it took. I don’t have that much time right now, so I cut them. I’m cutting feeds right and left - things I just skimmed aren’t worth my time right now. I’ll never leave blogging - it’s my journal, and I’ve been here a very very long time. I’m just simplifying the things that take away brain capacity. Sometimes it feels like I’m full up in my head and everything is sort of sliding off the top ’cause there’s no more room. So I’m making room. I’m also looking into other blogging possibilities - while being properly compensated. I don’t have great expectations, just open to the possibilities. I’m also looking to the possibilities of at-home telecommute positions, in order to get me home before we&rsqu...
Alas and Thus
2008-05-27 21:09:00 I am no longer writing for Special Needs Parent or Stars Behind Bars… To much work (hours and hours) for too little pay, and now I’m just too busy to commit. So, I said goodbye. perhaps other opportunities will come, but I had to release that to move on. I’m still writing here, of course, and I’m hoping that those readers will come here if they liked me writing. And I’ve still got Butterviews going. But for now, that’s it. I simply ran out of time. Perhaps, as life does, things will shift again in the coming months.
fog lifts
2008-05-23 16:41:00 You know how yesterday I was all angsty? Well this was in clear skies, before the rain, thunder, lightning, flash flooding, mudslides, and tornadoes (?!). Today I feel great. So either I felt it coming, and now it’s broke, or something. I don’t know. I’m just that in tune with mother nature, dude. That or I’m bipolar. Seriously, though, my husband sometimes wonders. As an aside… I think I’m finally a grown up. I actually lost track of what the heck I was doing in the shower this morning. Why? Because I was internally debating the pros and cons of money market accounts. People, I’m dreaming about being fiscally sensible. Does that give me grownup status?
sludge
2008-05-22 18:11:00 I haven’t been updating often. Here or anywhere else for that matter. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I feel anxious, restless. Like something’s coming but I don’t know what. I can’t seem to settle or concentrate on anything. I’ve been procrastinating in all my writing. I barely have enough attention in me to get the dishes done. Sometimes. I can’t figure out what this unease, this cloud is. I mean - I know that I’m working towards certain goals, and that they’re years away from completion. in the meantime I need to just plug away. But I can’t seem to get my head on straight. I always seem to have this vague uneasy feeling. The feeling that I need to be prepared. But prepared for WHAT? Are we talking emergency supplies, or getting a lawyer for a tax audit? It’s that vague. I’m probably just suffering from some mild anxiety and I need to take a chill pill. I don’t ... More About: Sludge
How I got my online handle
2008-05-20 19:06:00 I was recently asked how I got my handle, “Sparksfley.” Sometimes you see me as Michele - and other times Sparks or Sparksfley. It’s really quite simple. I had canceled my aol account, and then decided to create a new one. I got sparksfley from Sparks - a name my husband was calling me due to my working as an electrical assistant and Butterfly which my husband also called me. I decided to combine the two into Sparksfly - but someone already had that one. So, I added the “e” and became sparksfley. For the rest of my online handles and email and such, it was just easier to keep the same one so I didn’t have to remember them all. I’m now known as Sparksfley across the web. More About: Online , Handle
Happy Birthday, Logan
2008-05-15 18:36:00 I’m not sure what to say to you on your 6th birthday… You’re quite a character. Everything you like… “It’s my Favorite!” Even if you said that about something else not a minute prior. You’re giving. You’re loving. You’re sneaky… Stop sneaking into your brother’s room to steal his toys in the night, son! And what’s with eating the Splenda? You’re so very smart. You’re cute, and funny, and kind. When they took you away when you were a day old and put you in the NICU, I didn’t know if you would live through the night. I knew nothing. But Oh, son. You’re a joy and a terror. I wouldn’t have it any other way. Now, please stop getting up before 6am. More About: Happy , Birthday , Happy Birthday , Logan
Conversations
2008-05-13 18:31:00 It’s no secret that we’re a Christian family. So - discussions about God come up on a regular basis. This stemmed from a conversation in which Joseph wanted to know how many times he’d been in the hospital, in the car, on the way to school, with one small measly cup of coffee in me. Joseph: So - everyone’s been in the hospital at least once right? When they were born! Me: Well, no. Some people are born at home. Joseph: So - they might have NEVER been in the hospital. Me: Right. Logan: Well - God was in the hospital when he was a kid. Me: No, ’cause God was never a kid. He has always been the way He is. Now, Jesus, His Son was a kid once. Logan: So he was in the hospital? Me: Well, no, they didn’t have hospitals back then. Joseph: Well, I guess he’s REALLY REALLY old now. Me: Well, no. The way it works is, He died for our sins when he was about my age. He died, resurrected, and now lives at the right hand of His father, God. Joseph: We...
Comment Question 3
2008-05-12 18:26:00 This is the last question asked in my question post. If YOU want to ask a question, feel free. Steph asked (and I’m not linking to the Steph I know who reads. I figure if she wanted me to, she would have put the link in the comment, so I’m leaving it out on this one.) Are your (extended) family and friends “there” for you and your special-needs children? Is their emotional support (or at least being understanding of what you go through with your kids) what you expected, hoped, imagined… Let’s see. Yes and no. My parents… Yes. They try. They try to understand what’s going on with doctors, and like to sometimes take the kids to their appointments themselves, because it gives them the opportunity to talk to the docs face to face. Beyond that, they just love on their grandkids. I try to stay out of their relationship, as they keep discipline consistent with us. Beyond that - I stay out. My parents live next door. Each wee... More About: Question , Comment
Happy Mother’s Day
2008-05-11 16:00:00 A very Happy Mother ’s Day to all the moms, no matter what kind. You matter.
Comment Questions 2
More articles from this author:2008-05-09 23:35:00 Pardon the slight radio silence… Had a technical glitch which has been fixed. In keeping with the questions asked (which you totally can still do… Ask away) I have the questions asked by Mickey. What helped you battle your drug addiction? What keeps you up? What helped me battle… It is a hard question. I never actually participated in a rehab program of any sort. What happened, is in the span of 3 days: I found out that a drug dealer was after me for the bad debt of my ex-boyfriend (mistakenly believing the ex would care.) Left my apartment because those I lived with left, and I couldn’t stand those who moved in. Started for Northern California with my brother, and a hundred bucks in my pocket and all my worldly possessions. I didn’t actually MEAN to get clean. But leaving L.A. meant the dealer after me would forget about me. And moving 350 miles away meant that I didn’t know a soul - including those that could give me drugs. I ... More About: Questions , Comment 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 |
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