Sparks and Butterflies Sparks and Butterflies Caffeine from above ~ Coffee from below.... I'd sure like some dull! Articles
Poe is the Center of the Universe
2011-11-06 18:50:00 So, today is Sunday. In addition, DST is ending. So, I woke up early, of course. I noticed something interesting. Everyone was up, but Poe wasn’t home yet (because he had to work an extra hour due to DST). No one wanted to do anything. I was hesitating on the coffee, the kids didn’t want me to make their breakfast. The whole house was on “pause” until Poe got home. In addition, when Poe got home – and was practically attacked by his family – he let me know that tonight he has to work 12 hours. This has a trickle down effect. Due to when he needs to sleep now, I don’t get to go to therapy. I won’t be grocery shopping (I NEVER go with both kids). I’ll be handling the night time stuff (that’s Poe’s thing). We won’t be eating dinner together. It just messes everything all up. Seriously, I’ve now realized that the universe revolves around Poe. He’s surprisingly OK with this. Ok, that’s not surprisin... More About: Universe , Center
Saturdays
2011-11-05 16:28:00 This is the point where I start having trouble on NaBloPoMo. Saturdays and Sundays. You see, I try to stay out of the computer on weekends, because I’m off and on it so much during the week, and I started connecting my computer to “Have Tos.” Here it is, though – Saturday, and here I am. I remembered! Yay! Saturday is my one Do Nothing Day. I don’t clean. I don’t work. I don’t do my routines. I don’t cook. It’s do it yourself day. I mean, yeah, the kids get fed, but it’s sandwiches or soup – nuke ‘em. I watch movies or play WoW. Or anything I want. I get to sleep in – although today it constituted 8am. I had to pee, and then noticed Poe wasn’t home yet, so I worried, and that meant not going back to sleep. Anyways – it’s my official sloth day. I don’t shower, I don’t dress, and my kids and husband know this. In fact, he encourages it. I can tend to push myself during the week,...
A Typical Friday
2011-11-05 07:15:00 It’s been a long time since I did one of these. Thought I ‘d give another go. Most of this would be terrible boring to most – but it’s my journal, which I print out for posterity, and I think these snippets of real life are important to record as so much changes over the course of our lives. 6:00am Alarm goes off. I normally hit “snooze” a couple times first, but I was in the midst of a nightmare I’d rather not revisit, so I got up. Took note that one of the kids were in the bathroom at some point, and left the light on. Wonder if anyone’s sick? I hope not. 6:00am-6:30am Restroom. Coffee. Check headlines, emails, calendar/to-do list for the day, weather, bank account. Research and purchase a special Christmas present for Poe. All of $25, but will have significant sentimental value 6:30am-6:40am Wake Joseph up. Feed him his breakfast of choice. Coco Puffs. I can’t decide if I’m a terrible mom or a rockin’ one. Give h... More About: Friday
New Post Coming Soon
2011-11-04 16:10:00 Yes – I’m still participating in NaBloPoMo. This sort of a placeholder… I decided to write a day in the life post. Today. My day ends around 11pm, so It’ll be posted late tonight. More About: Post
Wild Wonders of the Momma Bear
2011-11-03 15:31:00 I hate the fact that I have to be a momma bear. But hey, what can I say? If I don’t advocate for my kids – who will? Joseph is on something through the state called AB3632. What that basically means is that the state recognizes that my kid needs more help than an IEP can give him, and so the state pays for his therapy (a certain amount of hours). A lot goes into the decisions as to what’s in the programs. What I mean by that is, it’s not rubber-stamped. Every other year a social worker and Psychologist come in and have meetings with Joseph and us to determine if he still qualifies. They will also meet with his teachers, psychiatrist, and therapists, all separately. So far, they’ve never denied him the program. Then, every six months or so, his teachers, his therapists, the principal, and the lead of the special school he’s in meet with us and we hack through his IEP. Everything from his education, his testing, how he’s doing, goals – p... More About: Wild , Wonders
Are You Prepared?
2011-11-02 15:22:00 One thing we’ve been working on around here is emergency preparation. One teacher I follow on YouTube said this about her stash: These are my earthquake-fire-emp-mayan calendar-bible apocolypse – economic disaster – zombie apocalypse supplies. To which I say, “Exactly.” You see, you never-ever-ever know what can or is going to happen. Never. Right now, I think the country is on a dangerous, teetering precipice. It could all go really really good, or really really bad, really really fast. In addition there are a ton of spiritual teachings about times we seem to be in, everything from ultimate natural disaster, to Biblical end times, to human enlightenment. And finally, I live in southern California. Can anyone say “earthquake?” And believe me when I say – that’s not fear speaking. In 1989, I remember watching the footage of the Loma Prieta quake. I remember the 1994 Northridge quake. But the kicker for me was the 1987 Whittier Nar...
NaBloPoMo – Yeah, We’ll See
2011-11-01 15:32:00 I decided to participate in NaBloPoMo this month. We’ll see if I can hang. I simply have stopped writing about my life. I know it ebbs and flows. After all, I’ve been writing my life online since 1995 (archives here go to 2000). Of course there are going to be times that I don’t write. It’s hard though. Lately, I’ve been extremely introverted and in a very personal headspace. Big thoughts about my place on this earth, my spirituality, my faith. This is a good process, but for a whole host of reasons, I haven’t wanted to share it publicly. Because the process takes up a lot of my mindspace when I’m not doing the mundane work of a family, or working, I’ve felt drained and unable to write about anything. Well, NaBloPoMo requires me to write each day – so here I am. Here’s hoping it helps.
Todo or Not Todo
2011-10-05 21:07:00 I’m really struggling with a decision. I’m not sure I’ve ever had this much trouble just making a damn decision. Procrastinating on following through? Yes. The decision itself? No. Furthermore, the predicament has put me in a situation with a client I’ve never been in before – and I totally don’t know how to react, or what to do about it. It’s particularly sad, I think, when a client comes up in my personal therapy. Sigh. I know. I’ve been vague. That would be because the internet is forever, and regardless of the situation – I have no intention of publicly maligning my client on the internet. This is about me and what I need to do about it. Which, at the moment? I have no idea. More About: Todo
I got Interviewed
2011-09-28 21:47:00 I got interviewed. One caveat… She calls me a Mommy Blogger. I dislike that term. “Mommy” sounds to me like I have babies – my kids are 11 and 9, so that’s not true. Plus, I consider myself a “Life” blogger – I wrote before I got married and had kids, and I’m pretty sure I’ll be writing after they leave the nest. So, yeah. Anna Deskins is a writer, and a huge proponent and lover of children’s books and reading to your kids. She asked to interview me – and the results are here on her blog, An Interview with Mommy Blogger, Michele. Go check it out.
Life Can Be Hard… Ya Think?
2011-09-22 15:23:00 Yeah. That title is a little dumb. Kind of like saying the sky can be blue… Water can be wet. Ya think? So, where the hell have I been? Right here. I work from 5am to 5pm with some breaks for things like picking up the kids. Work is rather demanding at the moment, and I’m still trying to get my feet under me. I’m learning to not make my clients’ emergencies my own personal emotional emergencies, if that makes sense. But? We need the money. In addition, my mother needs much more care. So, that’s thrown in there, and I had to drop a few clients for that reason. I just couldn’t keep up. And to the “friends” on Facebook who I don’t know who are friends simply to be game neighbors (ie, I don’t know them)? Your comments of “Where are you, I sent you stuff?” Unappreciated. It’s a game. I can’t play right now. Deal. Then? Joseph had another 5150. For those not in the “know” – that’s ... More About: Life
Zero Me Time
2011-08-25 17:13:00 As part of the BlogHer Life Well Lived series, I want to answer this question: How do you take care of your skin when you have zero “me” time? Really, the key for me, is making a part of my hygiene. Everyone needs to be clean. But the more… Intricate parts (exfoliation, moisture, etc.) escape me, and I don’t want to spend the time. SO. I have to take a shower, right? (Um. The answer to that is yes.) I spend the time in there, and have created a routine. Toothbrushing, shaving, getting clean, hair washing all happens in there. I buy exfoliating and moisturizing body wash. Outside of the shower, I only put on lotion if I shave. I have a box on the counter of the stuff I do for my face all lined up. That way I can dry off, and just go down the line of lotions and potions, and not think about it. Unfortunately, I have to get more complicated than I’d like with my face because when I hit 30, acne hit like I was 16, and it’s a daily fight. And serious... More About: Time
An Update
2011-08-15 20:53:00 Oh where to start, where to start… Let’s just update you on all. Joseph – started his first day of Middle School today. Could we just have a moment of silence for me? **shhhh** OK. Enough said. Early in the summer we stopped Joseph’s meds. That turned out to be a disaster that I’d rather just forget. Suffice it to say… he’s back on his meds, and we’re not going to do that again anytime soon. Period. But he’s back on his meds – he’s started school, and he’s back to doing well. Logan is still on summer break until 8/29. But he’s as ornery and funny as ever. Poe is doing great, but has a current hatred for what he’s doing. There are some other possibilities on the table that are keeping us in a state of limbo, which I hate, but has the potential to be great. More on that later – if it pans out. And me. I’ve been working my little tushie off. Which has left me no time for keeping up with fr... More About: Update
What Happened to Goodbye – Book Review for BlogHer Book Club
2011-07-05 14:57:00 I love books. I really do. And I’m part of the BlogHer Book Club ! For them, I reviewed What Happened to Goodbye by Sarah Dessen. So… Go check out what I thought of the book! More About: Book Review , Review , Book Club
Catching Up
2011-06-22 20:41:00 I know, I know, I know. I disappeared. I can’t help it. Let’s see. Let’s do a recap on everyone. Joseph: Doing well! He starts 6th grade in the fall at his same special school. That district does Jr. High 6-8, so he’s technically entering Jr. High. Which… I’m not ready for. Neither am I ready for the budding puberty I’m witnessing. Under his psychiatrist’s direction, we’ve also stopped his meds. Except for a couple of days of adjustment, he’s done fine, which is great. I’m waiting for 3 months into the school year, though. That will be the true test as to whether he can stay off the meds. I know of wherefore I speak. He’s currently doing summer school. Logan: Also doing well! He starts 3rd in fall. They’ll also be bringing in some modifications, as well as an OT observation based on a medical request. Of course, I’ve been asking for 3 years, but hey, better late than never? or something. Anyway, the...
A Discovery of Witches – Book Review on BlogHer
2011-06-13 22:27:00 I love books. I really do. And I’m part of the BlogHer Book Club! For them, I reviewed A Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness. So… Go check out what I thought of the book! More About: Book Review , Review
A Jane Austen Education – Review on BlogHer
2011-05-24 20:39:00 I love books. I really do. And I’m part of the BlogHer Book Club! For them, I reviewed A Jane Austen Education by William Deresiewicz. So… Go check out what I thought of the book! More About: Review
100 Things About Me
2011-05-19 23:55:00 Been at this since ’95, and it’s the first time I’ve attempted one of these. Some are serious – some are not (but true). Edited to add: Also – my template changed all the numbers to alphabet instead. I have NO IDEA how to fix that. So when I say “See number 20?” I mean “Letter T.” Apparently. I don’t like hummingbirds. They’re vampires from hell that want to suck the juice from my eyeballs. Bees scare me way too much for me not to be allergic. They always have but I got stung by a bee in the crotch. That takes talent. My husband can solve a Rubik’s cube in under 3 minutes. Not my thing, but so random I have to mention it here. I have incredibly curly hair. I sometimes have pink hair. My eyebrow is pierced. I have two tattoos with plans to add more that connect those two into one picture. Yes, they all mean something. Yes, I’d do it again. I waited a year for each to be sure. I am politically conservat... More About: Things
This Year is Somehow Different
2011-01-18 18:55:00 For the last two years, I’ve basically ignored myself. Some of it was on purpose. For example, I’d struggled with weight loss and body image issues for so long, that I purposefully ignored them. No attempting weight loss. No struggling with clothes, fashion, etc. Does it fit, and the colors go together? Fine. No dieting. Everything else got ignored too. I didn’t shave my legs unless it was date night (wink). I didn’t get my nails done. Cut my own hair, when the frizzies took control. Makeup was a big deal. I ignored myself in other ways too. I became sort of robotic in getting through the day. It’s been a survival mechanism of sorts. I know I’ve been in depression on and off. But there was no money for drugs, no money for doctors. Anything in those terms had to be put towards the kids. It’s not a good thing. It just is. This year is somehow different. I’m ready to change my life. But I didn&r...
It Happened to Me
2011-01-13 21:46:00 I really hesitate to write this out. More people from my personal life read here than ever before. As a result, the place for me to dredge my thoughts has been censored. Diluted. I’m at the point of total writer’s block. Don’t get too personal… Your business contacts might find you (dude, I’ve been writing online since ’95. It’s out there.) Don’t get too controversial. Don’t get too bitchy. Don’t talk too much about religion. Don’t talk about other people. I’m done. I can’t do it anymore. I’m reclaiming this place. It’s my journal. It’s my journey. I need it. I do it publicly, because I don’t have many friends. I need the community so I don’t hole up completely. It’s personal. Dirty. Challenging. Ugly. My thoughts. I have to get them out, and this is the only place I know how to do it. I’ve been dealing with some cra...
2011
2010-12-31 21:15:00 October 1950: American model Joan Vohs poses for a new year greetings card. (Photo by Keystone/Getty Images) What do I want out of the new year? I don’t make resolutions per se. I find them to be restrictive. But I do have general goals. It’s an end and a beginning, and it only makes sense to think about what you want out of your future. I want to be more organized. No. I want to feel more organized. I don’t often drop the ball, and people – from friends and family to clients – know I’ll handle the details. But that doesn’t mean my mind is calm, or that I feel in control. Most of the time I feel like I’m hanging on by my teeth and fingernails. So, I’m back to doing FlyLady. Slowly. With baby steps. I’m being more proactive with my business. I’m creating plans with the emphasis on what works to implement them. I want to feel more healthy, alert, and energetic. Which means quitting smo...
Take it Back
2010-12-28 20:37:00 We’re taking back the house today. It’s overrun by Christmas gifts, crap from our office flooding, and halfway undone decorations. It’s becoming a bit of a difficulty. We still haven’t found the leak, and we’re due for more rain tonight, tomorrow, and Sunday. So we can’t dry out the corner. Plus, all my Christmas boxes are in my father’s garage, and he’s apparently not home. But Dammit. We’re taking back the house. My husband is in Field Day mode (if you or your spouse is former military, you know what I’m talking about). So – I’m basically working while he attacks the house. And I really do mean “attack.” I stay out of his way when he’s in this mood. So – basically, tomorrow I’m not going to be able to find anything, because my husband has put it away in the wrong place. But at least it’s not on the floor anymore. More About: Back
A Fresh Start
2010-12-27 20:49:00 I’ve been overwhelmed in every single aspect of my life. It’s been such a struggle just to put one foot in front of the other. But I’ve always loved this time of year. Saying goodbye to the old year, saying hello to the new year. And that’s what I plan on doing. I’ll probably get more specific as time goes on, of course. But there are changes afoot in nearly every aspect of my life, from the house on up to my spiritual walk. I’m determined to see them as good, as necessary, and to to the work. I’m tired of the frozen stagnation I’ve felt. A phrase I’ve heard bandied about lately, “Be the change you seek.” That’s what I’m working on. May 2011 be the best yet. More About: Start , Fresh
Sad Realities
2010-11-22 19:02:00 I took Logan with me to the grocery store the other day. As we were leaving we passed a Salvation Army bell ringer. Logan asked who he was. I’m sure that looks strange to a child. A man just standing outside a store ringing a bell. Anyway, I told him that the man was hoping for some cash or change, and that they use that money to help people with things like clothes and food that don’t have the money for it. Logan said, “But, Mom, we should talk to him! That’s us!” Sigh.
When Will They Accept It’s Not Right?
2010-11-15 19:25:00 *note – I totally know an apostrophe goes in “it’s” – apparently my template has decided it’s a no-no in a blog title. Remember my post on the new TSA Regulations? Sexual assault and privacy and all that? Well, the ramifications of the policy are starting to come out. The TSA ejected a passenger who refused a “groin check.” My favorite line? “You touch my junk and I’m going to have you arrested,” Tyner can be heard telling the TSA agent as his cell phone camera captured the ordeal. And someone from our very own blogging world has been effected. I mean really. Who doesn’t want their labia and breasts touched? A line you should think about? “It is acceptable and encouraged that a TSA government official can do something to an American citizen that US military personnel cannot do to a member of the Taliban.” I again repeat myself – I don’t care. I, as a rape survivor, don’t think I can fl...
I Want to Win This
2010-11-10 17:35:00 In early 2009, I attended BlissDom. This conference is everything I wanted in a conference. It’s smaller and more intimate than the other conferences I’ve attended, BlogHer and SXSW. I had a ton of fun. Considering my hatred of crowds, and my insecurities, it was fabulous. Whenever the people got to be too much, I was able to escape to my room and come back when I was ready. I talked to people. I had fun at their extras, like the pajama movie party. I wanted to go back this year, but our finances didn’t allow it. My finances don’t allow it for 2011 either, but I’m entering a contest. The grand prize – a full trip, airfare, conference, and hotel. I might can swing food and airport transportation. I am definitely entering. I doubt I’ll win – but the sure way not to is to not enter! Do you want to enter? No, you totally don’t, so I have a better chance to win, but I’ll give you the information anyway. I&rsqu...
Sickened and Scared
2010-11-10 02:24:00 I have alluded to this in the past on the blog, but I’ve never come out and said it before. Since it pertains to my reaction to the story I’ll share with you, I need to state it clearly. I am a rape survivor. I was raped twice, and (just) physically beat up once. I survived. While I’ve dealt with most of the crushing issues that come from surviving, I do still deal with certain ongoing ramifications. Some examples… My husband is the only person on this earth who can come up to me from behind and touch me, and me not react negatively. He’s the ONLY person I can show physical affection for and receive physical affection from easily. In reality what does that mean? I have to work exceptionally hard at showing physical affection to my children. I have to fight very hard to never wince or cringe when they come up from behind me in the course of our daily life. I have to fight very hard to not withdraw from them when they physically rea... More About: Scared
Breaking Ties With The Cool Kids
2010-11-03 20:51:00 I am a blogging dinosaur. No, really. The archives here go to 2000 (that’s a decade). And actually I started writing an online journal in about 1995, so there’s five years of entries somewhere that I can’t access. I’ve seen fads come and go. I’ve seen platforms come and go. I’ve seen lots and lots of people come and go. I’m still here. I’m not here because I’m some great writer. I’m not even here because I have something to say, although I do. I’m mainly here to leave a mark that I can come back to to see various points in our lives from my perspective at the time. As journaling online turned into journals and weblogs, then journals versus weblogs, then weblogs, then blogs; the “cool” kids came out to play. Did you ever think that high school would get renacted in your life in various ways over and over and over again? I didn’t. But I get it now. Time grows shorter lately, and... More About: Kids , Cool
The Best PMS Euphemism Ever
2010-10-27 00:38:00 So, I raided the cocoa puffs. I needed the chocolate fix. I only do this during that time. Logan: Mom? Are you having chocolate issues? Me: Yes. Yes, I am.
Some Less Depressing Stuff
2010-10-19 21:34:00 <shameless self promotion> After that incredibly dreary post, here’s an update on the other stuff I’m doing around the web… As always, I write at the Fun and Function blog. I have a card giveaway going over at Butterviews. There’s a deal posted at Butterviews for Crystal Essence products. And I have a fledgling business blog to go along with my business website. ::cough::Comment love is always appreciated.::cough:: </shameless self promotion> More About: Stuff
It Boggles the Mind
More articles from this author:2010-10-19 21:16:00 We are having a bit of an issue around here that is pretty much dominating my thoughts at the moment. First, this job of Poe’s said he would receive (sorely needed) health insurance after his probationary period of 90 days. That would have meant November 1st. Right? Yeah, not so much. They decided to wait on him until the open enrollment period, putting his effective date on January 1, 2011. OK. That puts a serious crimp in things, as the kids are due for their physicals and blood work needs to be done on Joseph. But two more months won’t kill us. We got the paperwork. It tells us the amount to cover family PER WEEK (he’s being paid weekly.) I think “They just mean that’s the monthly premium, removed each week.” You know, the monthly premium divided by four. WRONG. Essentially, that IS the weekly amount. Let me explain what that means. By the time he’s done paying for health insurance, we would have approximately $4... More About: Mind 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 |
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