Dear Dreams Dear Dreams An indifferent angle of looking at things evolving the mysterious impression, but often loses curiosity due to excess honesty and frankness. A dreamer who has yet to find his strength and meaning in life, still searching for himself Articles
Somewhere in Time Theme (Cover)
2008-04-27 19:03:00 Sweet! Listen to this to make you feel more relaxed. Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com More About: Time , Cover , Theme
Environmental-Unfriendly for Environmental-Friendly
2008-04-27 01:25:00 Yesterday when I was returning home after getting my lunch from Amara hotel, I met an uncle who looked like “ah beng” at the lift lobby. He disgusted me badly when he started spitting on the floor, though, by the side.This type of uncivilised action was common but it was still very pissing, especially when the place was quite nicely done. I started flexing a little.Inside the lift, I noticed he was holding something and a closer look at the items stunned me. He was the distributor for the recycle plastic bags.Basically, this green life program allows all families to donate away unwanted but recyclable items like newspapers or clothes. Those second-hand goods collectors (garang guni) are not allowed to purchase anything kept inside recycle plastic bags, or otherwise, they would be fined.The problem is that this program is supposed to be a very meaningful and thanksgiving one, and yet, the organisation has employed someone who is so environmental-unfriendly to do the job. What kin... More About: Environmental , Friendly
Awful Volleyball Again
2008-04-26 01:37:00 Volleyball for the past few days were really awful especially on Thursday night because window shopping inside the court had begun once again. It was an insult and I was really disappointed with some people.Anyway, I was totally lack of sleep and my brain was floating. I should not have wasted my time in the first place. Two nights of volleyball again was basically killing myself by taking my time off so that I had to continue with my work till near daylight to shag myself out furthermore.It was difficult to make decisions at times due to too many constraints. Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com More About: Volleyball , Awful
The Peace that I Have Been Seeking
2008-04-24 20:48:00 My whole family have left for Hong Kong. I guess it is work, both official and personal, that make me station alone in Singapore. Sometimes I do feel funny as well when my family members are living their lives to the fullest with all the entertainments. Maybe, the answer is that poor people can enjoy travelling as well.For this trip, I have thrown in hundreds of dollars, partly as my mum’s birthday present.The greatest advantage of their absence is that the electricity bill will definitely drop without the usage of air-conditioner for both rooms, especially my elder brother’s room which he switches on for long hours. Next, I will definitely be able to concentrate on my stuffs when there is no one keeps trying to tell me stories when I am busy.Somehow, I feel weird and lonely. I suppose sleepiness is massacring the tranquillity. Better luck for the next few days! Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com More About: Peace , Seeking
Urgent Tasks, Greater Productivity
2008-04-23 19:38:00 It was days of working late that I kept nodding in front of the computer. Lack of sleep had deprived me to walk like a zombie at times. Fortunately, I still managed to survive in front of the little kids.I dread bearing responsibility but it is responsibility that makes me strive harder to fulfil my tasks.When I have plentiful of time to allocate my own timing, I seem to stare into the air most of the time. I realise occasionally I do keep browsing through all the reports and statuses to keep myself away from uneasiness.When personal work load stacks up, I begin losing control of everything.Having lots of important and urgent tasks on hands do burn me out a lot and deepen my sleep debt, however, do increase my productivity.I need to learn to prioritise and focus on my tasks.Talking about fairness, it never happens in our society. I must be too soft that people tend to take me for granted. Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com More About: Productivity , Urgent , Tasks
Slow Emails
2008-04-21 22:24:00 I do not like having to rush work at night because I believe I deserve my own rights to own my leisure time. However, it can be a release for me since I will not be able to touch on my personal work, which has been causing stress on me.But somehow, having to reply lots of sensitive and formal emails is really awkward and unusual.I really hate the fact that when someone approaches me in the midst of when I’m struggling to catch a breath, and I rather get myself suffocated than to not help, yet it turns out that I should have remained in exile.I dread and despise being doubted.The hurt increases when I'm being mistaken after trying so hard to please everyone, especially when I'm so sure that I have given much more effort than anyone else.It is stupid that things often turn out bad.Do you realise by now why I'm so slow at times when I'm replying emails? I take too much precaution in every word and detail, such that, the hurt due to negligence can be minimised. Skai Chan @ http://... More About: Emails , Slow
Guilt VS Fun
2008-04-20 20:21:00 I feel quite guilty for playing volleyball twice last week. At first, I even decided not to play volleyball anymore and then I knew I should not let it distant my friends and I. However, it should not be the case that I start indulging and spending too much time on volleyball again.It was fun after all. When more people started to play with more serious attitude, time was better spent. Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com More About: Guilt
Insertion of Extra File by Webhost
2008-04-19 08:48:00 For the past few months, I was very irritated by the relocation of my personal homepage on load. On Technorati and Google search, the title "Relocate" was displayed instead of my original scripted title. Since I did not make any changes before that, the problem was unpredictable.I checked on my domain host to confirm that I did not make any changes within that period of time as well. I made adjustments in the setting of my webhost, to include and exclude certain services but none was helpful enough.Last week, I took a random check in the webhost directory and found an extra file "at_domains_index.html" among the long list of my HTML files in the root directory. The web server had added in this extra file without informing me.The crucial thing was that the server was loading that file instead of "index.html", which I believed it was configured by their administrators; meaning that it should not happen in other webhosts.This unprofessional work by the webhost could actually cause big ... More About: File , Extra
Friends for Life
2008-04-18 17:45:00 I do not like the feeling of good friends falling out with each other, do you?If you share the same sentiment, why not do something to solve the problem? Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com More About: Life , Friends
Blogger Downtime
2008-04-17 01:39:00 Blogger has been quite unstable for the past few days. Navigating around the “Dashboard” using Firefox is slower than Internet Explorer at times. It is definitely inconvenient especially if you are running a few blogs. The downtime has also affected the traffic.The plan to switch over to Wordpress has been a dream since years ago. Priority and urge have been battling throughout me. Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com More About: Blogger
New Environment
2008-04-15 21:56:00 It was a hard day at work since I failed to catch any wink throughout the entire night. I began stoning since the morning. It did not begin well at all. Finding a cubical with lock inside the toilet seemed impossible. I hated changes and the new environment would definitely take me quite a while to get used to.Towards the afternoon, getting back to old place with familiar faces granted me more comfort. I hated restless days.The exhaustion sent me to bed soon at home. Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com More About: Environment
Home Alone for Five Nights
2008-04-14 21:22:00 My elder brother left Singapore again last Saturday night. It is probably not a very good job even though he gets to go overseas every month to gain new experience; at any place, it is the people which matter the most.My entire family including my elder brother’s girlfriend will be going to Hong Kong on 24th till 29th April 2008 and therefore this year, I will not be celebrating her birthday on the day itself – 25th.I will be alone for five consecutive nights, which I have not yet tried before.There is high chance which I will die of starvation or even stink to death because I’m so lazy that I will not even go downstairs to buy my own meal or cook my own instant noodle, and that my stinky clothes will be left on the bucket for the days. When my family get back, the smelly clothes will be added on.On the first night, I would be return with my ultra stinky volleyball gear, which will definitely penetrate through the entire house.I definitely need maids.As far as the public is co... More About: Home , Nights
Third Alone Trip to Marina South Pier
2008-04-13 19:59:00 I made my third alone trip to Marina South Pier just now. I actually wanted to go in the early morning but it was unwise to jog without sleep.I took my lunch really late and even though I set off near sunset, I felt the stiff on my intestine at the start. I managed to press on till my destination but timing was really bad. The place was more crowded than usual, which was not a good timing.I took a walk at the front of the restaurant at the second storey called “Pier Eleven”. It was the first time the staff handed me their namecard, which I quite liked the clean design. Maybe I should try it in future.I could not stay as long as previous times since it was already very late. I dragged on my feet on the return path. It was never good to be alone at night for somehow loneliness was at its mightiest. For the first time, I did not have confidence of getting back. Instead of jogging straight to near NTUC, I stopped right besides the Singapore Conference Hall; at least, I did manage to... More About: Trip
Debugging a Dream
2008-04-13 01:33:00 A day ago, I gave up debugging something for the “Quit Smoking” site. I knew it was getting late and though I was not nodding in any direction, I probably could not run my tiny brain enough to solve the problem. I knew sleeping was the correct decision since I had to quit sleeping near daylight.It was long since I encountered such problem that it took me effortless near six hours to program the coding for just a simple feature. I woke up to continue with this endless project, keeping my concentration focused. It took me around an hour to debug and eventually felt accomplished.It seemed that perseverance had rewarded the effort but sadly, not every dream could come true. Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com More About: Dream , Debugging
想要的梦
2008-04-12 12:12:00 梦里的你相似现实，似乎萍水 逢、视而不见。就在我努力的 持中，我看到了自己的脆弱与 无能。我看清了自己，我接受 失败。眼前折腾着的我即使对 念念不忘，还是一个毫不起眼 的路人甲。我眼中的无奈说出 多年来的憔悴、牵挂、自残。 我睡个好梦，一直到末日。就 算是千年以后，我醒来而发现 从不属于我，至少我曾有个虚 的幸福。 Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com
Trojan Hijacking Google Adsense
2008-04-11 17:57:00 A day before, I was fighting against some Trojan s and spywares.That was probably caused by downloading of some cracks from the internet and my Norton Antivirus did not do enough to stop any intrusion internally.Anyway, I supposed it was nothing serious. The problem was that the images on all web pages opened by Firefox were changed to some weird advertisements instead; none of the Adsense advertisements were spared.The creator of the Trojan was quite smart in a way that he replaced all the Adsense advertisements, which certainly would cause huge damages to the webmasters who were trying to make a living through Adsense advertisements.Most internet users would probably not care about whether the Adsense participants are making money a not. However, the replaced advertisements did consist of pornographic and also very distraction images.As for me, I did achieve results from Adsense before though things were not going well for now, I really cared a lot about the replacements of the Ads... More About: Google , Google Adsense
Working Zombie so Hardworking
2008-04-10 19:40:00 I was working really hard on the “Quit Smoking” site. Even when I slept for less than three hours the night before, I continued till near daylight again.Seriously, I do not know how long more it would take and if it could ever be finished. No matter what, it is something which I start from scratch,There are too many things I want to start on and every dream is taking away bits of me every second, such that I cannot concentrate.Mingli did highlight to me that I should be doing something more economically valued; I have things in mind but I’m trying to focus. Probably, I would be taking off requirements in order to push the “Quit Smoking” site to live as soon as possible. Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com More About: Working , Zombie
They Prosecuted Me on False Charges
2008-04-07 23:26:00 It was just to simulate the feeling which had been flashing in my mind ever since I was stunned; I was not alone but I was probably the only unlucky one.Apart from losing so much time which I could probably push the “quit smoking” site to a later phase and the mood to enjoy myself the entire week, I did learn some stuff.I was being released somehow, at least from the responsibility which never meant to be mine in the first place. Things could be really ridiculous in the first place.We could not buy back time. Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com
The Fear, the Hate
2008-04-06 21:31:00 I dread stepping into the place where many people insist in their own thinking. I hate to argue, I hate to fight and sometimes I have this wishful thinking that I can remain in peace.I hate being pestered as well. Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com More About: Hate , Fear
My First Bowling Attempt
2008-04-05 19:00:00 I made my first attempt in bowling with a low score of 78 points. The first set of rules was to trim long thumbnail before playing the sports. It was fun with lots of entertainments throughout. We discovered Cherie’s secret of four continuous tries for the same nine pins.Friday was really a great day but it was also a sinful day which I spent too much time outside and not working on anything. Perhaps, it was good for relaxation, to release all the long bottomed hateful events and experiences.It would be great if I can do that every weekend. However, this dream is too far away from reach when I have not stabilised my work. Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com More About: Bowling
Lagging Behind and Pressurized
2008-03-24 19:56:00 Meeting up with old friends can be quite pressurizing, especially when most of them are soon-to-be or already degree holders. A stable and high income seems so reachable within short period of time. Transportation does not seem to be a problem with the luxury lives.What I’m left with is just years of ruins after perseverance towards unknown goals, using unplanned tactics. Sometimes I get humiliated by my honesty, with doubts and fears. I do not even know where to head to.Some friends do give me hopes but it seems like having more choices can slow down a man more, especially choices that do not seem to be realistic, or not visible.I hate totally not knowing what is going to happen next and I hate being doubted when I’m already doubting it myself. Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com
Nobody Reads Me
2008-03-22 11:25:00 Why must you prove them that they are right?Out of so many people, all you can get is me? I have already told you of my stand and taught you what you can do, what is it that you do not understand about? I do not wish to fall off with my old buddies even though we often have different thinking. It is just a few more months that I must survive and I really hope there will not be any crap again.What you are doing is simply killing me indirectly. If you want me to lead the fight in a war, I will not leave my men alone in the frontier. So this day, I have to struggle with the pain after moving near eighty CPUs to the door and some of the big bulky monitors too. Not to forget I have said I have a long term back injury.I’m working so quickly because time does not spare me any grant. You simply get me just because I’m more easygoing and helpful, not considering the fact that there are others who can easily leave the place so early while I have to struggle till the end each day and somet...
So Tired of Everything
2008-03-20 19:44:00 The weariness is killing me. I’m both physically and mentally drained. The lack of sleep, lack of relaxation, lack of rest and lack of freedom are suffocating me.Maybe I’m just too greedy that I want so many things to be done and I want other people’s work to be finished soon as well.I wish I can sleep continuously for an entire week! Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com More About: So Tired , Tired
Live with Comments
2008-03-20 02:17:00 Sometimes, we ought to pity on people who view blindly.Even if you are not very good with computer, you will not causally judge someone who is sitting in front of the computer as “free and nothing to do” without even looking at the screen at what he is busy with.We simply live in a world where there are too many shallow people. It is pointless to be angry; moreover, they are probably just passing causal remarks and not doing it on purpose.We have to learn to live with ridiculous comments. Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com More About: Comments , Live
Determination’s Pros and Cons
2008-03-18 18:55:00 Determination is one of the greatest attributes to success. We put behind all difficulties and set aside the unwillingness to strife on; we say no to failure and refuse to abide to hardship.However, in the midst of our struggle, we should learn to realise that dramas are usually fantasizes of human beings, and that not all heroes get what they deserve in real life; we should understand and face the fact that not all determination leads to success to avoid disappointments.Since being determined does not necessary lead to success, why do we even want to try in the first place?If we try, we may fail; but if we do not try at all, we are bound to fail. Success due to luck is exceptional and we should never depend on it.Initially, we need to justify the purpose.My staying up late each night to finish up works seems heroic. Nobody can stay up till daylight after brain has completed shut down severe times that determination has made miracle; however, having such bad sleeping habit is really... More About: Cons
Finding Song
2008-03-17 18:56:00 你是我的 演唱：苏有朋 电视剧《刁蛮公主》片尾曲你 贪玩的孩子 偶尔任性 偶尔放肆 每当你安静的数着手指有谁知 你心里的事 我是等你的男子 我很肯定 也很坚持 爱你是需要特别的方式 哪怕要和世界对峙 但总有一天你会是我的 不管过程到底多曲折 你迟疑逃避 我却从不会放弃 心痛你为爱受着每寸折磨相信 一天你会是我的 不管对手到底有几个 你能自由来和去 我都等你在原地Anyone has the MP3 file by chance? Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com More About: Song
Websites Dealing for the Weekends
2008-03-16 21:48:00 For the past few days, and even at this point of time, I’m very busy working with websites. The amount of work pending for my completion is enormous. I owe a few people some websites, and at the same time I’m trying to maintain some sites for testing purpose.Sitting in front of the computer, straining my brain to debug and forcing concentration on some boring repeating procedures almost caused my suicidal.Nevertheless this is what I prefer to do, and that I did make some achievements somehow, for instance, on design and implementation of features. The hands-on on a couple of new stuffs were good experience. I need to release some of my energy for new input of knowledge, open myself up and explore more.The “Quit Smoking” site is still on hold due to time restriction and sadly, nobody with good English can offer me any help. Besides, the programming part is also another headache. Not to forget that I still owe Gilbert another website and I hope our flames of enthusiasm has not... More About: Websites
No More Upcoming Shows
2008-03-14 18:55:00 My scenes for the new show, “Just in Singapore” are all over. Last Friday, this Monday and this Tuesday showed episode 10, 11 and 12 on channel 8; and the last one caught me unprepared for I did not expect them to be aired straight in a row. Anyway, only episode 12 had my face nearer to the screen.The only lucky moment was the close distance interaction with Fiona Xie, which some guys would certainly envy, and which I could boost about, but actually was nothing fantastic.The days which I was working on website at home and could afford some little time for filming at Mediacorp would always be remembered; during those days, I did not have any responsibility other than the fact that my saving was depleting. Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com More About: Upcoming
新醉打金枝 DVD
2008-03-13 18:59:00 There are not many good things that happened recently, at least none that I can remember.Until Wednesday, my younger brother bought the DVD for “新醉打金枝”. Both of us like watching it. The storyline goes well and it is tremendously entertaining with all the humours.I have missed six episodes consecutively for my reservist and the week after that due to fatigue. Ever since, I no longer need to be afraid that I would miss any episode on every Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday nights.Twelve bucks for five or six DVDs was quite worthwhile. However, I’m so afraid that I might lose control of myself… twelve bucks after twelve bucks and after twelve bucks is no longer cheap. Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com
Smile Alone Does Not Solve the Problems
More articles from this author:2008-03-11 16:46:00 A present of appreciation is a boost in morale, but never enough to kill all the unhappiness. Things are really beyond help. The work, the betrayal, the limitation and the unforeseen are haunting. Maybe, I’m not suited at all.Benefit of the doubt seems too foolish to be given to everyone.We all learn as we grow up by facing liars, setbacks and all the backstabbing. Smile alone does not solve the problems, let alone all the drawbacks. Skai Chan @ http://sillydumb.com More About: Problems 1, 2, 3, 4 |
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