Paternal ProsePaternal ProseThis blog chronicles my fatherhood experiences from the months prior to the birth, the birth, and beyond. Articles
A Diaper Story
2007-04-21 23:51:00 Last night while changing Cooper’s diaper, I experienced a sequence of events that I’ve heard told many times over by new parents. Things were going well; I had removed the soiled diaper and was moving to the next step when I was hit with a stream of liquid that seemed disproportionately excessive in both amount ... More About: Humor , Story , Infancy , Stor , Tory
Cooper?s in Town
2007-04-19 16:55:00 Cooper Gregory Seaver was born at 9:22 pm on 4/17/2007. He was 7lbs, 11oz, and 18.5 inches long. Kandis was a trooper through the entire labor, including three hours of pushing. She is much stronger than she gave herself credit for, and is doing wonderfully today. We’re both walking around in a haze of exhaustion and ... More About: Cooper , Town , Coop
Induction
2007-04-13 05:41:00 We learned today that Kandis will be induced Tuesday morning. I’m excited knowing that’s the latest the baby will be here, and it give me a few extra days to get the house cleaned up. It’s also nice because we can call ahead to board Millie for a couple of nights. Luckily, the cats can ...
Due Date
2007-04-12 16:07:00 Today, April 12th, is our official due date. As you can probably guess by the lack of pictures or excitement conveyed in this post, there is no baby. We have a doctor’s appointment this afternoon where the baby will be monitored for 20 minutes, and we’ll get another sonogram. Our doctor told us previously that ...
An Ending
2007-04-10 07:18:00 Tonight, Kandis and I went out on what may have been our last outing before parenthood. It was a great run, and we had a lot of good times, but everything has to end. Sure, I’ll miss it, but everything I’ve heard tells me that the coming years will bring a lot of fun and ... More About: Ending
A Ripe Old Age
2007-04-07 20:51:00 It seems like only a few years ago, Kandis and I were in our mid-twenties, having a grand old time and living it up. We’d stay up as long as we wanted, and sleep the day away if we felt like it. My, how times done changed! This morning, we found ourselves up at 7 ... More About: Old Age
Graduation
2007-04-05 01:00:00 Last night was our final childbirth class. If you’re an expectant couple, and ever want to meet a friendly, happy group of people, I recommend attending one of these sessions. We had fun and got to meet some nice people who will all probably receive an email the day our kid is born. What a ... More About: Graduation , Adua
Zen Riddle: What?s the sound of one advertisement shutting the hell up?
2007-04-03 18:45:00 Last night, I was perusing a website that contained advertisements. I’ve got nothing against advertisements, and if they can generate some cash for you, go for it. The problem starts when those advertisements start talking to me, and in some cases, yelling at me. My first experiences with the web were in 1994, when HTML and ... More About: Advertisement , Men , Sound , What , Hat
A Hero
2007-04-03 00:58:00 I define a hero as someone who acts altruistically and courageously in the name of something greater than they are. My wife is a hero. For the last nine months, Kandis has endured morning sickness, an expanding body, discomfort, and pain, all with dignity, selflessness, and courage while nurturing and protecting our son in her womb. ... More About: Hero
Keeping the Friends You Have
2007-03-31 01:45:00 One of my buddies invited me out to his bachelor party tomorrow evening. It’s good to know that so far, the fact that I’ll soon be a dad hasn’t scared my non-parent friends away. I’ve expressed concern before (somewhere in the archives here) about losing my friends, and I still hope that doesn’t happen. However, ... More About: Friends , Friend , Keep , Have , Ends
On Schedule
2007-03-30 04:36:00 Kandis and I went to our 38-week baby checkup today. I had been hoping the doctor would discover something that might have prompted her to push the due date up by a week. Unfortunately, we had no suck luck, so we’re still on schedule for April 12th. It was a little disappointing, but two weeks ... More About: Schedule
A Letter to Wall Street
2007-03-26 18:53:00 Dear Wall Street Investors, I have several mutual funds set up, which would provide me with enough money to retire at age 96, and send our unborn son to one week’s worth of college when the time comes. Just because there’s some negative news on last month’s housing sales, does not mean you have to dump ... More About: Letter , Tree
Rock-a-bye?
2007-03-26 02:46:00 How many people remember hearing the following song at some point in their life? Rock -a-bye baby, on the tree top When the wind blows, the cradle will rock When the bough breaks, the cradle will fall Down will come baby, cradle and all Kandis and I were discussing this popular lullaby the other night, and came up with two questions: What ...
The Waiting Game
2007-03-26 02:31:00 Today was it. Kandis declared that we have everything we need for the baby’s arrival. That sounds like a dangerous proclamation, but I have to agree with her. We have a boatload of clothes, diapers, bottles, changing table, Diaper Champ, crib, co-sleeper, and a host of other things that I can’t recall at the moment. ... More About: Game , Waiting , Wait
This Week in Childbirth Class
2007-03-23 00:05:00 Last night in childbirth class, we learned about pain management. The epidural, though it will require that Kandis experience some of the discomfort and pain of labor, sounds like it will be good for both of us. Once the epidural kicks in, Kandis should feel more pressure than true pain, but still have enough feeling ... More About: This , Week , Birth , Child , Class
Perceptions
2007-03-19 23:36:00 One of my biggest fears is not being able to control our son when he gets out of hand, giving off the perception that I have no control over him. I worry about how the public and my family will perceive my effectiveness as a parent, and am driven as much by those external factors ... More About: Perception , Perceptions
Perceptions
2007-03-19 23:36:00 One of my biggest fears is not being able to control our son when he gets out of hand, thus giving off the perception that I have no control over him. I worry about how the public and my family will perceive my effectiveness as a parent, and am driven as much by those external ... More About: Perception , Perceptions
Walking a mile to school in a foot of snow?
2007-03-19 23:21:00 I’ve been thinking a lot about the world our son is going to experience, and how different it will be from the one I experienced as a child. In other words, I’ve been having a lot of “Back in my day…” moments. When I was young, I never understood why adults felt the need to ... More About: School , Walking , Snow , Mile , King
No Moniker
2007-03-17 20:29:00 No, we don’t have a name for the kid yet. We have some ideas we’re tossing around, but won’t be naming him (or publicizing any possibilities) until he is born. We want to see what he looks like, so we can see which of our choices most closely matches his appearance. Silly idea? Maybe, but ... More About: Nike , Moniker
Asking the Tough Questions
2007-03-17 06:48:00 I’ll be a parent in a few weeks, and I have to ask a question that’s puzzled me for years. Why is it that little toddlers are often running around with no clothes on, or shirtless? This isn’t meant as any form of criticism towards parents, but I’m perplexed and need to know. Is it because… …they’ve ... More About: Skin , Question , Questions , King , Quest
One Month
2007-03-12 19:29:00 It’s exactly one month until the due date, and I’m as ready as I’m going to be. In this case, “ready” means “completely unprepared”. I think that conceding to the idea that I will never be fully prepared for the road that lay ahead has been helpful in keeping me from becoming a basket case. ... More About: Month , Mont
Xtreme Childproofing
2007-03-11 20:55:00 The other day while hunting around for something, I opened the cabinet under the kitchen sink, and a can of Ajax toppled over, spilling its bleachy-white powder about the floor. It occurred to me that one day we’re going to have to think about child-proofing parts of this house. How much child-proofing is too much? A ... More About: Roofing , Roof , Child , Xtreme , Trem
A Political Rant
2007-03-06 20:30:00 I told myself before starting this blog that I would refrain from posting political content, fearing that my politics would turn people away. Screw it. What character flaw is it in George W. Bush that prevents him from intervening militarily to address the crisis in Darfur? It’s rare that I advocate the use of military force, ... More About: Political , Politica , Rant , Poli , Politic
Sixteen Tons
2007-03-06 01:53:00 And what do you get? About 100 square feet less than you had before. The amount of baby paraphernalia we received via Kandis’ shower this past weekend is appalling. A stroller, a papasan (something I hadn’t heard of until this weekend), diapers, stuffed animals, clothes, a kit full of mysterious devices including a bulbous snot-sucker, ...
Calm Down
2007-03-06 00:56:00 I’ve taken some serious flack for this post, both on and offline. Some say that I went too far, giving the impression that I have the self-esteem of a corpse. That’s actually not true; I was going for some humor and hyperbole, but must not have been clear enough about it. To whomever hired the motivational ... More About: Down , Calm
Hoedown
More articles from this author:2007-03-05 02:33:00 The fetus has been hearing a lot of banjo playing lately. His soon-to-be father, a neophyte to this marvelous instrument of bluegrass, has been practicing some songs. Our son, in the comfort of his mother’s womb, is enjoying such tunes as Cripple Creek and Bile ?em Cabbage Down . Bluegrass music and banjo pickin’ make me ... 1, 2, 3, 4 |
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