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Oh woe is me
2007-11-12 16:43:00
We are back from our trip to Branson and it was nice to come back to so many supportive comments on my last post. I've given it a lot of thought and agree that Isabelle's teacher is a bit too conservative and overeacted. I should have remembered this about her from when Madeline was in her class. She would tell me that Madeline was hyper as if she had committed a crime.In Isabelle's defense I can't blame her for thinking so much about having a boyfriend and a first kiss. I've been paying attention to the shows they watch such as Hannah Montana and the Olsen twins movies and they often involve a love interest and sometimes a kiss. When I was Isabelle's age I watched The Brady Bunch and Little House On The Prairie which were much more wholesome. So for now I'm going to stop worrying that I'm messing up my kids. I've got something much heavier weighing on my mind.Just before we left on our trip I received an email from my mom asking for permission to come over and talk with m...

Boy crazy daughter is making me stir crazy!
2007-11-08 06:32:00
We are heading out of town tomorrow for our annual Branson trip so I'm leaving you with a story that relates to "the talk" I had with my daughters last weekend.My seven year old, Isabelle is a bit boy crazy and I'm trying to figure out how to handle her and all her "boyfriends" since I did not go through this with my oldest. Currently she has a crush on a boy in her class and has been talking about him quite a bit. Yesterday she wrote nineteen pages in her notebook about how much she loves this boy along with drawings of the two of them. There were two drawings of them kissing. I saw some of the drawings and they seemed innocent enough. What I did not realize was that she took the notebook to school today and apparently several students and teachers saw what she had written. In the carpool line at pickup today Isabelle's teacher poked her head in the car to let me know that Isabelle is writing inappropriate things in her notebook.Of course I'm thinking there must be a drawing of...
More About: Crazy , Daughter

I'm done talking about sex....for now
2007-11-05 16:31:00
After much fretting and stalling, I finally had "the talk" with my two oldest daughters who are seven and nine. I collected several books on sex and puberty over the last two weeks and had been mentally preparing myself for the moment of truth.My moment came and went on Friday when Madeline caught the word "rape" while flipping through television channels. She completely caught me off guard when she asked me what rape meant. I was bringing groceries in at the time and the baby was crying so I acted as if I couldn't hear what she was saying and to ask me when I was done. I was betting on her ADD and that she would forget her question in a few minutes. She did which bought me some time to figure out what I want to say.The next day when the boys were out of the house and the baby was asleep I gathered my books, took a deep breath and approached the girls. I reminded Madeline of her question from the previous day and if she still wanted to know what rape meant. She did so I matter-of-f...
More About: Talking

Pure Essentials Giveaway
2007-11-03 03:47:00
I have laundry envy. It's not that I'm envious of how much laundry someone else has. Unless of course they have less than me or they have someone do it for them. What I envy is HOW their laundry smells. Seriously. I love clothes that smell clean. Do you know what I mean? That just washed detergent smell. For some reason I cannot obtain that same smell for my laundry. My family's clothes smell clean if I sniff the fabric but I want it stronger. I want them to smell clean when they walk in the room.Please don't think I'm crazy. I don't know why I've become so obsessive about how my laundry smells. I've tried every detergent there is. I run out and buy every new scent that hits the market. I use fabric softener and dryer sheets. I've tried different combinations of scents in hopes of obtaining that strong clean smell but to no avail.I've come to believe that it must be how I do my laundry. Should I use double the amount of detergent? Liquid or powder? One dryer sheet or two? ...
More About: Pure , Essentials , Essential

Martha would be proud
2007-10-31 14:07:00
I've had some serious insomnia the last few nights. Why is it that the nights I suffer insomnia are the ones that my kids become sick and needy? Connor has a cold and asthma so I was up quite a bit with him. He gets that barking cough that has him coughing until he pukes. After several sheet changes, a breathing treatment, and ten minutes sitting outside in the cold air to help his breathing I was finally back in bed for more sleepless torture. I put Connor in bed with us which did not help my insomnia. It was like trying to fall asleep with Darth Vader breathing in my ear.It seemed that every time I started to fall asleep I had another kid waking me up because their nose was stuffy, their tummy felt funny because they're excited for Halloween, or to find a lost pacifier. I figure I got a total of seven hours of sleep the last two nights.The lack of sleep must be preventing sufficient oxygen to my brain because I've been channeling my inner Martha Stewart these last few days. I r...
More About: Proud

Get frisky with your boobies
2007-10-29 15:25:00
October is the Breast Cancer Awareness month and although the month is nearly over I plead with you to not to forget to feel your boobies once all the pink reminders go in hiding. Lately it seems that every month someone I know is diagnosed with breast cancer. It scares the crap out me and Inflammatory Breast Cancer scares me even more.While grocery shopping yesterday I shared several aisles with a family of four shopping together. A very average looking family; a mom, dad, one boy, and one girl. Except they weren't average. The mom appeared frail and wore a hat in an attempt to cover her bald head which led me to assume she must have cancer. As I shopped behind them I couldn't help thinking about what they must be going through. What was their story? I wondered how sick she was and how scared her husband and kids must be. How scared she must be. Her kids looked to be in their early teens. Their mom's illness would be a major blip in their young lives. I wondered if they always h...
More About: Boobies , Boob , With You

Fabulous Smiles
2007-10-27 03:56:00
I am way overdue for posting some lovely blog bling that has been bestowed upon me. According to the lovely Lisa from Midwestern Mommy I make her smile. Right back at you, Lisa. I always have fun with you and I love how "easy" our conversations are.The fabulous Burg from Deeper Shades of Red thinks I'm fab.Isn't pretty?I made the mistake of bragging to my girls that a blogger gave me an award for being fabulous. Big mistake. Sharpay's song "Fabulous" from High School Musical 2 has now become my theme song according to my kids. They remind me of this every time the song plays on the radio and have blared it so much at the house that many days I can't get the damn song out of my head. So I did what any desperate mother would do and conveniently "lost" their CD.I'm going to live up to my slacker name and pass both of these onto these bloggers who are fabulous and who never fail to make me smile:Mamma LovesPlaygroups Are No Place For ChildrenSticking To The PointGaining BalanceCan ...
More About: Smiles

I'm only interesting when I'm a crazed lunatic
2007-10-25 19:50:00
A meme 4 youChristine from Watch me! No watch me! tagged me with this meme and after doing it I realize that I'm really not that interesting. After I bore you with my boring tidbits about myself go read my last post about how I turned into a crazed hysterical lunatic when my baby went missing.4 Jobs I have had:Wendy's (my first job)Motherhood Maternitywaitress (great $ that put me through nursing school)Registered Nurse (specialized in cardiothoracic ICU)4 Movies I love to watch over and over:(This is hard. I have so many)Fried Green TomatoesPulp FictionKill BillThe Shawshank Redemption4 Places I have lived:Miami, FloridaMissouriMissouriMissouri(I know. Boring.)4 TV shows I enjoy watching:Desperate HousewivesNip/TuckMediumThe Ellen Show4 Places I have been:Jamaica for my honeymoonCancun ,MexicoPeurto Vallarta, MexicoAll over the US4 Websites I visit daily:My blogMy other blogGoogle ReaderCheck email (a lot)4 Favorite Foods:chocolatedark chocolatechocolate with nutschocolate with p...
More About: Interesting , Eres

Where's the baby?!
2007-10-25 04:39:00
Earlier today I left a comment on this post about what I call "Freebies From God". These freebies are little wake up calls or reminders to be more diligent about the care of our kids. I must have been due for a freebie because we had a frightening close call tonight with our quite not two year old, Marigrace.It started as a typical evening in the Slacker household. We had just finished dinner and baths. It's a busy time of night or what I like to call organized chaos. Hubby cleaned up the dinner dishes while I was in the master bedroom attempting to listen to Isabelle read a book for her book report. The phone rang frequently and we were interrupted several times. Connor popped in twice to ask me questions and Marigrace came in to show me that she was wearing Connor's shoes. Madeline became quite excited about being able to see the space shuttle in the night sky so she came and got Isabelle to go outside and look at it with her. They returned a few minutes later and Isabelle res...
More About: Baby

I'm still talking about sex
2007-10-24 04:29:00
A father asked his 10-year old son if he knew about the birds and the bees."I don't want to know," the child said, bursting into tears. "Promise me you won't tell me."Confused, the father asked what was wrong.The boy sobbed, "when I was six, I got the 'There's no Easter Bunny' speech. At seven, I got the There's no Tooth Fairy' speech. When I was eight, you hit me with the 'There's no Santa' speech. If your going to tell me that grown-ups don't really get laid, I'll have nothing left to live for."Thank you my friends for all the great advice, stories, and book suggestions on my last post. I ordered every book that was recommended in preparation of "the talk". I received Dr. Ruth's book today and I'm practicing reading it without giggling. It's actually a very well done book on the subject and much less graphic than this German book about where babies come from.I'm going to be so relieved once I unveil the secret of sex to my kids. I never ima...
More About: Talking

Kodak celebration giveaway
2007-10-23 23:00:00
Birthdays are definitely special times for kids and grown-ups alike! Kodak is helping moms and kids capture those special moments with their new celebration single use cameras, which will be available in ten pack increments for $79.50, exclusively at the Kodak store at Kodak.com. Not only do they look cute on any table, they are also a great way to give your child a chance to become a budding young photographer. The cameras capture great images and, because they are inexpensive, you don’t need to worry about them falling and breaking!I am giving away one ten pack of Kodak's celebration single use cameras on November 1, 2007. Read more here about how to enter this giveaway.
More About: Celebration

Let's talk about sex
2007-10-18 18:33:00
The birds and the bees talk is lurking right around the corner at the slacker household. My two oldest daughters Madeline and Isabelle are nine and seven. I'm not at all ready to have "the talk" with my seven year old but I have a feeling that once Madeline knows the secret of sex she's going to tell Isabelle. I was six when my cousin told me what sex was all about and I immediately sought out my sis whose 13 months younger to give her the shocking info.I've been doing a pretty good job of dodging their questions. I know, I'm a chicken. About six months ago Madeline asked me what sex was.Me: Well, your sex means you are either a girl or a boy.She did not look satisfied with that answer so I asked her what she thought it meant.Madeline: It's when a mommy and daddy kiss naked.Me: Exactly! See, you already know.Thankfully she was satisfied with that and we moved on to another topic that didn't make me sweat buckets.Whew!Then a couple weeks ago hubby had bath duty so he was in our...
More About: Talk

Give Iggy back!
2007-10-17 16:48:00
Image courtesy of MertHave you seen or heard this story? I love Ellen Degeneres. So much so I have a campaign to make my youngest daughter the next Ellen. She's almost two which means she'll be old enough to take over the show when Ellen retires.Ellen is what I call "good people". She's kind, compassionate, sincere, and genuine. The fact that she broke down in tears on her show proves she isn't all wrapped up in her celebrity. You can see the video clip here.The story is that she adopted a dog, Iggy from a shelter but it didn't work out with her cats. She gave Iggy to her hairdresser who was looking for a dog. Ellen thought she was doing the right thing so when the shelter called to check on Iggy she was honest and told them that she gave Iggy to a good home. Ellen didn't realize that she signed a paper stating she would return the dog if it didn't work out. The shelter took Iggy away from the family who had grown to know and love Iggy over two weeks. The hairdresser's daugh...
More About: Back , Give

Slackermommy thinks she's sexy
2007-10-15 15:50:00
I mentioned a week ago that I had boudior photos taken for my hubby for our tenth wedding anniversary and now I want to share the experience with you. It was too fantastic to not talk talk about it.After serving it's purpose and giving me four healthy babies I opted to have my lovely heart shaped uterus removed last December. It was no longer needed and the discomfort it was causing me was not worth keeping it around. While on the operating table I had the docs fix up my tummy and pump up my boobs. The results are quite nice and I feel pretty good about how I look so I not only did the photos for my hubby but also myself.I was nervous about it though and nearly chickened out. I'm really hard on myself and usually hate how I look in photos. Lisa, the photographer I chose is quite gifted and not only did she make me feel good she made me look good.I spent quite a bit of time looking for a photographer. I nearly gave up. The sample photos that I looked at seemed so cheesy and sleazy...
More About: Sexy

The Free Hugs Campaign
2007-10-12 15:16:00
I'm always touched by the writing of Jen from One Plus Two but this post especially touched me. She writes about a homeless man that shared his sandwich with her because he overheard her say she was hungry. He sacrificed his own needs for her. A homeless man who is rich in kindness, chivalry, and compassion. Sometimes those that have the least give the most.Her story reminded me of the Free Hugs Campaign . The true story of Juan Mann whose sole mission was to reach out and hug a stranger to brighten up their life. His hugging caught on until the city, police and officials banned it. A petition of 10,000 signatures was obtained and the ban was lifted. It's quite an inspiring story. You can read more about it here but first watch the video which tells the whole story along with the song "All The Same" by the Sick Puppies. It will make your day.

Would you want to know?
2007-10-11 04:58:00
One Grumpy Bunny tagged me with a meme a few days ago and I finally got around to writing about it although it's been on my mind quite a bit.She posed the question: If you are in the midst of the best possible moment that you will ever experience in your entire life, would you want to know it?I actually feel that I have already experienced several best possible moments in my life. The kind of moments that I call "Groundhog Day Movie Moments". Those are the moments that were so incredible that I just want to do them over and over. The first being my wedding day. As cliché as it sounds it truly was a magical day that I never wanted to end. But it did and I can still vividly recall waking up the next morning. I was filled with so much excitement about our future. We were embarking on our married life together. A promising future with lots of good things to come.Some of those good things were the births of our four children and four more "Groundhog Day Movie Moments". Hearing our bab...

The Great Virtual Breast Fest
2007-10-10 05:54:00
If you haven't heard yet, tomorrow is The Great Virtual Brea st Fest .I won't be part of the "nurse-in" since my youngest weaned ten months ago but I can claim a boob and a baby in the Great Breast Fest Montage.I'm beyond words in understanding how anyone can watch this video and find it obscene. I think it's beautiful. Breastfeeding my babies was one of the most amazing experiences that I've ever had. Watching my babies fatten up and grow was not only amazing but empowering. Even with my fourth and last child I was amazed that I was sustaining her life just with my milk.It saddens me that some find breastfeeding to be obscene and expect mothers to cover up when they are obviously the ones with the issue. Most moms are very discreet about nursing in public and it can be done without a blanket. But I don't think the possibility of seeing skin or God forbid a nipple is the real issue. I think some have sexual hangups and a baby nursing under a blanket helps "cover up" their uncomf...

He rocks my world
2007-10-08 04:15:00
Last Thursday was my ten year wedding anniversary and I had planned on writing a post about the trials, tribulations, and triumphs of my marriage but time got away from me. I actually wrote that post last year so this year I'll just give you some fluff.We celebrated last night with dinner at a restaurant that we haven't been to since before kids and stayed the night at the hotel we stayed at on our wedding night. We had a great time and I have a hangover to prove it. My hubby gave me a diamond tennis bracelet and I had boudoir photos taken of myself for him. Unfortunately it will be a few more weeks before they are ready. I'm so excited for him to see them because they turned out so much better than I expected. I found a very gifted photographer who made me look and feel beautiful. The whole experience was amazing and I hope to get around to writing that post.I feel that I should honor my ten year anniversary and my husband in some way so I came up with ten things I love about my...
More About: World , Rocks

Pink for October
2007-10-02 20:14:00
Did you know that the chance of developing invasive breast cancer at some time in a woman's life is about 1 in 8 and that women living in North America have the highest rate of breast cancer in the world? Currently there are about 2.5 million breast cancer survivors in the United States. Fortunately death rates from breast cancer have been declining due to earlier detection through screening and increased awareness, as well as improved treatment. You can help the reduction in breast cancer and in finding a cure by helping raise awareness during the month of October which is the Breast Cancer awareness Month.Let's show our support for those with breast cancer, breast cancer survivors, and their friends and family. With odds of 1 in 8 I'm sure all of us have been or know of someone who has been touched by breast cancer. Help raise awareness by turning your blog or site Pink for October and entering my giveaway for a pink digital picture keychain. Leave your link if you are particip...

Whoring out my blog
2007-10-01 18:48:00
I got a call from the president of our school auction committee because word has gotten out at my kid's school that I have a blog and got a kick ass Wii party because of it. So far they don't know the name of my blog and I'm going to try to keep it that way. She wanted to know if I could pull any strings to get donations for our school auction and since I love our school so much I'm willing to whore it out.First a little background. My kid's attend a small private catholic school that includes a Montessori preschool. The school was founded by a group of nuns 40 years ago. I love this school. I've loved it since the moment I first walked in it's doors seven years ago. We were preschool shopping and that shopping spree ended the day we visited. Our tour was with the principle. A lovely warm and fuzzy woman with an obvious love for children. We were so impressed with the well mannered kids in the rooms we visited. Their joy of learning radiated through the halls and the classroo...
More About: Blog

Slacker Mom Confessions
2007-09-29 07:04:00
I've been doing a lot of confessing lately and now I want to hear your slacker mom confessions. No rolling your eyes. You know you've got one. Get it off your chest. Let me commiserate with you. Come on, come out and play with me. Let's make this fun.That's right. I'm having a Slacker Mom Confessions Contest and I challenge you to beat my latest slacker mom confession. Remember the poop I left in the tub for three days? (Which I don't recommend because it requires some major scrubbing to remove it from the tub.)Here's the gist of it if you missed the poop in the tub saga. No, it was not my poop. My little Marigrace left me the lovely present during her bath. Being the slacker mom that I am I did not clean it right away. I thought I would get to it later but I forgot and continued to forget as my family grew more and more disgusted. It became the Great Poop Standoff between me and my hubby. There was no way he was going to clean it up. It happened on my shift so it was my mess...
More About: Fess

It's all about me
2007-09-28 16:05:00
Yesterday was my 37th birthday.The older I get the less important my birthday is for me. I think moms especially have a tendency to blow off their birthday. It's just like another day to me but my hubby and kids did a nice job of making the day special. That's one thing my mom always did right as I was growing up. She would make such a big deal about our birthdays. When she was growing up her family did not celebrate birthdays so birthday acknowledgement was a gift she strongly felt she needed to pass onto her own children. She did a great job of making us feel special even though there were times our dad would find a reason to be mad at us so he could get out of participating in our celebration. Me and my sis think it was because he was so cheap and didn't want to buy us a present. Who knows? It may not have been about us at all but because he wanted to ruin something that was important to our mom.I've carried on the tradition of making birthdays a big deal with my own family. ...

Support ED in '08
2007-09-25 15:19:00
I'm going to do something I said that I would never do; I'm going political on my blog. At this point I have no idea who I'm going to vote for and I wouldn't tell you if I did. What I do feel strongly about is education reform which is going to be a hot topic in our next election. And it should be.My kids currently attend a catholic private school. I chose it not only for the religion but because I had concerns about the parish and public school in our area. Teacher turnover is high, class sizes are large, and test scores are low. I feared my kids would get lost. They are slow learners with varying degrees of processing issues but don't qualify as learning disabled which means the public school won't give them special ed services.The school they attend has small class sizes and highly educated teachers. The majority of them have their masters degree and many of them have been with our school more than ten years. My kids get the one on one teaching that they need and deserve. I...
More About: Support

Spreading the love
2007-09-21 18:19:00
I'm super late with sharing the blog love that has been passed to me by some of my favorite bloggers. My life is super busy with all my projects, four kids, school auction crap, and a bunch of other things that are overwhelming my life right now. Does this qualify me as a Super Mom or just a Super Dumb Mom for taking too much on? Thank God the smart discipline approach we have implemented is working out very well.Anyhoo, here are my awards:Mert from Almost Somewhat Positive gave me the Courageous Blogger Award. This is probably my most deserving award since I don't mind airing my dirty laundry or writing what most people only think to themselves on my blog. I just hope it doesn't get me into trouble some day. If I does, feel free to award me The Dumb Blogger Award.I'm passing this award to:Mom-O-MaticI love how she fearlessly writes about her weight, body issues, sex, and antidepressants.Suburban OblivionI love how she's taking on Bill Maher and his stupid breastfeeding vs mast...
More About: Love

How Do You Make Your Kids Mind?
2007-09-19 19:48:00
I've been writing a lot lately about my discipline woes and my good intentions to debrat my kids. You have all been very supportive and some of you have left me comments about what discipline tactics work for your family. I really appreciate it since I need all the help I can get.I've decided to hold a contest in honor of my quest to improve my discipline methods. I'd love to know more about your tried and true discipline tactics. Although I'm a parenting book addict I prefer to borrow tactics from friends and family that seem to work for them. These are the ones that are the most successful for me. I'm guessing because I'm more willing to make it work since I've seen it work for a friend. I recently shared my tip for turning a tantrum off instantly by pulling out a camera or camcorder on the offending child. Works every time in my house. Some days I wear my camera around my neck as a friendly reminder to my brats kids that tantrums will be recorded.Another tactic that has b...
More About: Kids , Mind , Make

Slackermommy needs a new vacuum
2007-09-17 01:46:00
The Parent Bloggers Network recently offered up a gig with Vocalpoint. I didn't hesitate at jumping on board since I've been a very happy member of Vocalpoint since February 2006.What is this Vocalpoint thing, you ask?Vocalpoint is a marketing service that offers relevant, provocative information about products and services. It's a site to influence and learn from moms like us. They have message boards, focus groups, and surveys so us moms can have a say about products we have or want. The best part of Vocalpoint is the free samples and coupons they send their members. It's not crappy stuff either. In the last month I've received the Meerkat Manor DVD and buy one get one free Vanilla Coke coupons. They are very generous with their coupons and will send you several so you can share them with friends and family. Or keep them for yourself which I admit I've done if it's something I buy often.Signing up is easy peasy lemon squeezy. No spam or bad side effects. I promise. Would sl...
More About: Vacuum , Needs

Why can't we get this parenting gig right?
2007-09-13 04:54:00
I'm giving serious consideration to writing that book appropriately titled, I Fucked Up. Now what? Over the last week I've had an epiphany that my discipline skills are not up to par. Now, after reading this post and this article I'm realizing that maybe my parenting skills aren't that impressive either although I'm not as bad as the parental examples in the article. I would never pay five grand to have my child be taught tips and tricks to get the correct answer on a SAT question without reading the question. I don't buy my daughters manicures and they definitely are not getting boob jobs for high school graduation. But bells and whistles went off in my head when I read this passage:"I’m exaggerating, but it somehow strikes me as the perfect image of modern parenthood: a generation of grown-ups bending over to accommodate our children’s every want, while simultaneously requiring nothing from them in return. On one level, we may have decided that childhood is too important...
More About: Parenting , Get This , Parent , Pare

Dazed and confused
2007-09-13 04:26:00
I'm a bit confused. Southwest Airlines found Kyla Ebbert's attire to be inappropriate but their flight attendants used to wear uniforms that barely covered their behinds? When did they become a "family airline"? From what I understand they don't have a dress code. The irony of this makes me giggle. I needed a good laugh.Check out my School Zone review at Lipstick to Crayons
More About: D and C

Slacker mom trying not to slack
2007-09-10 16:46:00
Here is the update to the update of my Smart Discipline post.The charts continue to work really well for Isabelle and Connor. Their behavior has greatly improved with their quest to not get any X's on their charts. Madeline of course had to find a loop hole in the chart but is quickly finding out that mommy means business this time.Saturday was an exhausting day of dealing with her trying to get her way. Her tantrums must have pooped her out because she didn't put up too much of a fight about not having a pillow and blanket at bedtime. She did fight me on it last night though. I had to really fight the urge to give in as she tried to convince me that she should earn them back since she did eventually make her bed. Every time I thought My God, what kind of mother sends her kid to bed without a pillow and blanket? I reminded myself of how it would set us back and I've come too far to let that happen. This is such an important learning lesson for us both.It wasn't easy though. She ...
More About: Slacker , Lack

She will no longer out smart me!
2007-09-08 18:46:00
I had some requests for an update on how the Smart Discipline charts are going. So far they are working great for two of my kids but my spirited and strong willed firstborn, Madeline is in need of the Smart Ass Discipline chart. She's the child who will find her way around any discipline tactic and she usually wins because she can bring me to the point where I just want to throw up my hands and say, "Okay, you win!" Today she decided to pull out her drama queen get out of jail free card.She had been holding it together quite well and didn't get her first X on the chart until yesterday. She took it well. She could see on the chart that she could break six more rules before she would lose a privilege. But today when she received two X's within five minutes I think she realized how quickly she could rack them up over a week.It all started with her tripping over our puppy. There was a little blood where she skinned her foot which brought on the drama. She cried and carried on. Even a...