Mama Milton

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jim-bob
2008-05-28 15:59:00
They used to line the door; this last name tag - nicknames given each week at preschool storytime - remains.I've got a soft spot for Jim-Bob. I can't bring myself to take it down.I look at it and I picture Zack perched at the front of a gaggle of 3 and 4 year olds, so healthy, so happy, waiting for the librarian to christen him with a new, silly name.Storytime was the spark. Those days crammed in the little library gave me hope. He was outrunning the delays that had left him behind.I will miss seeing this little tag when I move.(The obedient, the quiet - all apologies - can be found over here.)

to do
2008-05-27 19:52:00
Admit to self: Your bulletproof, water-resistant 'I don't need to write this down' memory is beginning to unravel. Grab some paper and a pen. Let's say a sharpie.Take up list making. All the cool kids are doing it.When in doubt, go back to #1. You doofus.Cast blame. Meds and neurosis should top the list as likely culprits. (Look! I'm getting the hang of it. We'll call it List 2.0: The Offenders.)Add a reward to the Master list. It's hard to take on new habits.

staycation
2008-05-26 18:16:00
Summer vacation is coming and with it, Big Plans.Our Big Plan: Get through the move. Everything else is gravy.I'm looking forward to lazy days at the park, propped with a book at the local community pool. My kids have hit the golden age of being allowed to swim without me, so I plan reading until my eyes fall out, while the yet to be hired real estate agent shows my house.I'm looking forward to taking day trips around the area. See Mt. St. Helens. Spend the day with my family. Go to the beach.I'm looking forward to seeing a movie in the park. Eating Ranier cherries. Seeing friends.(I'm such a homebody.)Picture courtesy of art.com; Lowell Herrero

ahead of me
2008-05-25 02:08:00
"Be careful."I bellow through the trees, watching both kids scramble ahead of me on a trail, each trying to beat the other down the path, into the lush forest.They are strong and able footed, but I panic when we near the drop off. I am startled when a couple of guys run past me, searching for their lost chocolate Lab. By the ravine. It does nothing for my nerves.We reach the lower falls and they teeter out to the edge of a mossy rock, searching for crawdads."Be careful, be careful, be careful."I find the words leaping out of my mouth every 20 seconds. How can they grow up, and develop any competence when every thing I say makes the world sound so risky. When I'm paralyzed they will what? Get wet. Twist an ankle?I bite my tongue. I stop chanting fearful words. I sit on a rock and look up stream, cursing my luck that Greg has the camera with him at the car show.From behind me creeps a sopping wet Lab; she shakes her coat and the kids rush to the lost dog's aid.They race ahead of me,...
More About: Ahead

days spent in her kitchen
2008-05-23 23:39:00
I wandered into my neighbor's kitchen last weekend during her son's birthday party, her kitchen for two rightful years now and I made myself at home.It's fraudulent, this familiarity with another woman's space, but in my mind it stills belongs to T, the previous owner.I used to sit at that very counter nearly every morning after the bus took our bigger kids off to school, and we drank countless cups of coffee. In the corner, I hear faint laughter, the days past with preschoolers underfoot, playing dressup. Running. Skipping.Lunchtime would approach, and I'd show myself out, another morning spent in the ease of a friend, before I took Zack to school.Rinse. Repeat. Two years passed.*****I never much liked her husband; he seemed overbearing. My gut feelings were on target, but I didn't grasp how deep their troubles ran.She had been hiding secrets from me, scary secrets about stalking charges, and previous attempts to leave him. He had punched their teenage daughter in the ...
More About: Kitchen , Days

the ups and downs
2008-05-23 00:17:00
The week hasn't been full of despair. Yes, I have been sad, and puked on, and I teared up when I asked a sales associate about picking up boxes today but I try to keep it all in perspective. I imagine my new house. Meeting new people. Maybe getting a job. I imagine gussying up a guest room and having company.I picture my circle getting bigger. An adventure waiting.Last week, the temperatures went from 53 degrees to 97 in two short days. The rains stopped and I got sunburned. And through it all, I had a low grade headache punctuated by a set of cluster headaches.(I'm blaming the barometer.)I discovered, writhing in pain, that laying on my face - no really - makes the pain bearable.So, I found myself like this last week.(Except I have hair. And a shirt.)I left a 4 year-old's birthday party twice, sounding a little too high maintenance for my taste. (The sun. Is too much. I must lie down. Big baby.)Lexi's choir practice at the senior center? Oh, I struck a pose.I went to the grocer...

of eagles and puke
2008-05-22 02:43:00
Morning came, as mornings do, and with it a question: Would Lexi be ready to go back to school after her umpteenth cough/fever combo? Or would I be ducking out of another field trip with Zack's class, leaving him seven year-old 'this is the worst thing EVER' sad?Just add rain and no husband and I had the perfect storm.Lexi had just decided to play it safe and stay home when I sat down quietly next to Zack to explain I wouldn't be able to make it when he yelped the most pathetic little yelp and she changed her mind. Girled up, if you will, with a little Advil and a hot shower.It reminded me so much of what we Moms do - pushing through, trying not to let someone down - that I got a little choked up at her maturity.Zack and I rode the bus down to the Water Resource center and learned about floods, and sturgeons and plants while a sweet little classmate turned my direction to heave, splattering his breakfast on my big black Danskos while I rubbed his back.(A mother's work is never ...
More About: Eagles

in motion
2008-05-19 15:38:00
I have to face reality today: We are getting the house ready to put on the market and we will be moving soon.There I said it.Then why do I still feel so sad? I've been trying to hold it together the past few days, but maybe I need a better tactic. I'm thinking: Rent a bunch of sappy movies and cry it out? We'll see.Meanwhile, there are field trips and potlucks and end-of-the-year everythings to go to. I have to admit that it is good that I can tell the kids something; we aren't teetering back and forth anymore. They can say goodbye to our school and maybe get some closure. (I'm a child of the 80s. I'm versed in psychobabble.)So, I am cleaning out the place, dividing my belongings into the going, goodwill and trash piles. I'm one crazy gene away from being a bonefide hoarder so I sit on my bed, in a stupor, wishing the task was something more appealing, like sawing off my pinky toe with an emery board. But. It's what needs to be done.You know what I need? I need your sugges...
More About: Motion

busy as a bee (must be spring)
2008-05-16 16:36:00
The sun is out and my windows are open. Can you hear my kids squabbling? It's grating on your nerves, huh?I'm on it, I swear.I'm feeling a little lean on the blogside. Lots of ideas; no time to write. (And not in that 'I'm watching too much crap TV' sort of way.)We came home from a school event last night and my reader was teeming with posts, ones I'd like to comment on. But then I was lazy and you guessed it, I watched Lost.I'll eventually get my head above water and stop by your place. I promise.But my daughter is crying over whether or not Spielberg directed any of the Star Wars movies - or produced or something, wah - and is pondering, aloud, how is he involved, exactly, with the Indiana Jones movie. And she needs to know RIGHTNOW. Pressing, pressing issues for pressing pressing times.(It's my due, for raising them to be movie freaks like me. Stupid karma.)So I'm off to solve cinematic debates and then to lunch & a movie with my sister and Mom. (Her mother...
More About: Spring , Busy

I didn't catch their take on Lost
2008-05-15 23:04:00
I was sitting in a hobbit chair this morning, cutting out laminated book covers for Zack's class when I hear two first grade girls, whispering when they should be reading.Blonde Piggytails: Um, did you know that An. Ge. Lina. Jol. Lee. is having twins? I think they are gurls.White Headband: Yeah, but did you know that Jessica Simpson and Ashlee Simpson are sisters?Blonde Piggytails: How do you know they are sisters?White Headband: I dunno. Maybe they are entirely different Simpsons. Like Lisa.Pause. They look over their shoulders at me. Their voices become barely audible.Blonde Piggytails: Hmmm. I don't know about that. But. I like Ashlee's hair red. It's red now.White Headband: It's 'cause of the wedding. Brides always do stuff like that.(And Mrs. Milton wanted to add something about her nosejob, but she thought better of it. The three of us had a lot to do before recess and the sun is finally out.)
More About: Lost , Catch

buddies
2008-05-14 18:06:00
Zack and his cousin, Austin. (Need a quiet moment? Head to Wordless Wednesday.)

lice are lousy all the time
2008-05-13 17:52:00
My friend C called me from her cell phone on her way to daycare, breathless, to say she was going to be in my driveway any minute. I was in pjs and making pancakes, and suddenly worried why she wasn't calling 911 instead.Something was clearly wrong.Turned out, she needed me to take a look at her girls' noggins. She needed me, the resident Lice Queen, to check. (Are you calling me on the cellular phone? I don't know you. Who is this? Don't come here, I'm hanging up the phone! Prank caller! Prank caller!)They were spared. Lucky them. But today I want to give you some of my hardearned nitpicking tactics, just in case those suckers come a knockin'.(I see you giving me the stink eye. I didn't say I want you to suffer, I just know how prevalent headlice is. Think of it as a public service announcement.)*If you have kids in daycare or school, familiarize yourself with their policy. This seems obvious, but hear me out. Our district's policy is for every family to check their kids h...
More About: Time , The Time

columbia gorge
2008-05-12 17:15:00
Lexi's choir spent Saturday night at the Skamania Lodge in the Columbia River Gorge , which seemed a little backwards for mother's day weekend, but whatever. To hear her tell it, this trip was necessary. But after little sleep, and a lot of swimming, I'm not sure that her judgement is sound. We crossed over the Bridge of Gods, and hit up Multnomah Falls on our way to my parents' house. It was misty out - we Pacific Northwest folks are fluent in 'rain' terminology - but it's always a worthy stop. (A worthy stop that will leave your hair frizzy.) The rest of the day was spent with family, tickling kids and stuffing our faces. What'd you do yesterday, O Favorite Moms of Mine?

to my mom
2008-05-11 15:51:00
There's a lot I could say about my Mom; she is amazing. But this year has been tough on her. It's been long and trying.(She's been caring for my Grandmother, which is a year's worth of posts in itself.)She remains the glue of the family, the one the kids clamor to visit.I just hope she knows how much we love her.

um, thanks?
2008-05-10 22:26:00
Mama Milton: Look. It says, "Welcome young authors".I'm trying to psyche Lexi up. She is shifting in the backseat, nervous about today's writing workshop.MM, longingly: I wish I was going...Zack: Um, Mom. It said young writers.MM: Yes, yes it did.(Good thing he fed me muffins.)

and it was good
2008-05-10 04:13:00
Zack woke up, singing an impromptu ditty about 'muffins with Mom, muffins with Mom', in preparation for a special breakfast hosted by his class to honor, you guessed it, Moms.He sang. He harassed his sister, on her case to get ready already.He insisted that I stop by Peet's coffee for a Black Sheep Bakery Vegan muffin, so I wouldn't be left out.And we sat on foot high chairs; Zack held a stack of books to read to me, I ate my special pastry. He pointed out students I had worked with, just the day before, because at 7, it is simply a treat, bringing a parent to school.Later some women at Jazzercise, a little further down the path, were lamenting that their grown children forget to call. Don't really keep in touch anymore. Especially their sons.I know it happens.But today, I was a queen. Heralded. Admired.I'm tucking this day in my pocket, and savoring it. To be so lucky.(And coming up in June...Donuts with Dad. First grade is a hoot.)
More About: Good

left to my own devices
2008-05-07 16:00:00
I'm feeling a little weary; I'm feeling a little irked. It's too bad too, because after painting with some students in Zack's class, and enjoying an afternoon with my nephew, I should be bounding off rainbows.Yet, still. Grumpy.I just got to thinking this afternoon: When did I become so complacent, so reliant on Big Media in place of my own Big Ideas? When did we as a whole?My local newscasters can't tell a heartwarming story without saying something stupid like, 'boy, that's really paying it forward', just in case I was confused.The democrats can't seem to get a candidate in place, even when most experts agree that the only way Clinton can win is if the superdelegates supersede what appears to be the people's choice.And Kathy Lee Gifford self-righteously pokes fun at 'mommy blogs' on national TV - not that she had actually taken any time to read one - because she is uncomfortable with women, common women anyway, writing about motherhood in a public forum.I wondered this...
More About: Devices , Left

*sigh*
2008-05-07 15:23:00
First day at Disneyland, just a month ago.(Wordless Wednesday)
More About: Sigh

lobbing a little meatball your way
2008-05-07 05:57:00
We cannot tell a lie. We love this commercial. We love baby meatie. (The kid's expressions get me every time...)

excuse me while I drink (water)
2008-05-06 04:43:00
Note to self: When you are due for your bi-monthly blood draw AND you've been sick, think about rescheduling.When three medical professionals comment on looking dehydrated, take heed. Maybe it's not the day to draw bloodAnd when the first, oh, 10 attempts are fruitless and the kind lady asks if she jab around the other arm, stop while you're ahead. You can come back.Because when you smugly say, "Sure, no problem" the next thing you know you're wheeling around on a gurney, dehydrated and woozy and pretty certain you've mooned the entire lab on your 'graceful' descent down.(Dang pants. Dang keister.)Two assistants, more pokes and a billion promises to take it easy later, I was on my feet and out the door. (So much for a margarita tonight. Make mine a virgin...)
More About: Drink , Water , Excuse

from beneath my rock
2008-05-04 20:54:00
I resurfaced yesterday to join Lexi's Girl Scout troop to Build-A-Bear and the mall. I was the one in the back, with the crusty nose.(Oh, how I love to nuzzle a kleenex box.)To know me is to know that: I am not fond of the mall, and I really don't have any burning desire to build a bear or a monkey and dress it in spiffy, spendy costumes.However, like many motherly things, this wasn't for my benefit. I sucked down some cold meds and felt just better enough to change into real clothes and tagged along.I was impressed; 18 girls, 4 adults, no snags.Lexi created a husky dog. The girls took pledges to spend more of their parents' money to become bestest friends with their critter, and Lexi was smitten. (I'm thinking Build-A-Cult?)I do a lot with and for my kids. But this was one of the times Lexi turned to me, several times throughout the day, and thanked me for coming. It was the last words on her lips, before she crashed out last night.You never know when the moments will come. I...
More About: Rock

a day of rest
2008-05-01 20:05:00
I am the queen of denial. The hayfever I thought was raging yesterday, was really just a cold, in disguise.(My brain cells have been expelled, via my nose.)I'm going to try a mustard bath, and take a nap, and read a pile of magazines from the library.(I've got a full weekend ahead; I need to feel better lickety split. No pressure.)I'll come a knockin', soon. I promise.
More About: Rest

I said get dressed
2008-04-30 17:56:00
This is what happens when you disobey your mother with a blog; she is liable to snap pictures of you when you least expect it.(Yes, for heaven's sake, I cropped it. I love the horrified look on her face as I pulled out my camera, to punctuate my point. *We need to leave in 5 minutes.* Like I'd post the whole thing. Geez.)My parenting techniques are going to cost me someday - I'm thinking therapy - but we were on time. (Wordless Wednesday; I wanna play.)

the one where I wander aimlessly around a parking lot
2008-04-29 18:19:00
Parking my car takes great effort. (Don't even ask me to parallel park. I think Lisa, age 16, knew how to do things like that. I promptly forgot.)Parking takes deliberate effort because I am scatterbrained and prone to wandering. I park, deep in thought, and shop in my stupor, getting what's on my list but really, I'm working out plot points in my novel that would so like to be.I step out the door and come to. I have no idea where I parked, and I stumble about, my cart full of milk and bananas and graham crackers, old before my years.I justify my dementia, as I circle the lot, trying to land. Writers can be preoccupied; it's just an occupational hazard.And I catch a glimpse, a flash really, of Stephen King, from the corner of my eye. He shrugs, shaking his head, sitting in judgment.I glower and under my breath: "Yes, I know thinking about writing really doesn't count." He hears me, like only Stephen can, telepathically. He remains unconvinced, but I'm convicted.I find my car, ...
More About: Parking

blog me like I have one of those twitter things
2008-04-28 20:04:00
Messy house, happy heart - still no post. *racking brain* nowJazzercise instructor has 20 years on me, and STILL manages to bring me thisclose to death. Sweet - we're doing the Charleston - death. 2 hours agoReturning car seat to my sister and tickling nephews. Taking abuse. They call me Aunt 'Stinky' and I haven't even worked out yet. 3 hours agoI woke up sure I wrote the perfect sentence in my sleep. I can't remember it. Drat! about 5 hours agoStephanie and I are headed downtown, after she points out her crush at the grocery store. Then it's off to Powell's, a movie and early dinner. 1 day agoI'm took the kids out to Grandma Jean's estate sale. My family is there. Austin, Zack, Lexi and I walk down to the creek, where Lori and I used to play. I'm flooded with memories. 1 day agoWe're strapping on some shoes and make fools of ourselves, bowling of all things. Dignified, fun-loving fools. Go out for Chinese food. 2 days agoWalking to the new dog park. The kids throw Frisb...
More About: Blog , Twitter , Things

stellar parenting moments
2008-04-25 15:00:00
Greg is in Vegasbaby, all week. He calls me from casinos and dinner parties and down crowded hallways and we catch up for a few minutes before he is called away. It's his company's worldwide sales convention and it's quite a production.Everything here is the same: Bland, but not boring. The kids have broken the bickering barrier, in high pitch tones I'm certain only sea monkey ears can register.I have reasoned and Loved & Logicked and ignored certain behaviors and doled out consequences. Nothing seemed to take the edge off.Zack wants to sing 'Head & Shoulders' in French, again, and Lexi wants to play 'When the Saints Come Marching In' on her recorder, again, but if I am not facing them, simultaneously, thoroughly taking in this unholy round, then they begin growling, at each other. Reprimanding the other for interrupting. Growling, to get my attention.Real, true, I AM YETI growling.So, I did what every seasoned mother would do; I yelled.I yelled something ridiculous ...
More About: Parenting , Moments

*jazz hands*
2008-04-24 23:03:00
Once upon a time, in the not so distant past, Mama Milton liked Jazz ercise. Strike that: She loved Jazzercise. She had loved it since its inception, when Judi Sheppard Missett pranced around in bare feet to Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy.She took classes in high school. She took classes in college. She dragged invited friends and begged boyfriends to come to class. And they did, and tolerated her obsession.A couple of years back, while wearing sensible workout attire - this isn't a hoedown, Ms. Jessie - she injured her knee and had to quit. For a while. Then she was diagnosed with sjogren's syndrome and her doctor lowered the boom: No more dance, no more Jazzercise.And she grew, well, fluffy.At least she had a tiara. Thanks, Stephanie.She's been walking a lot lately, doing yoga and weaning off Prednisone and frankly, she hasn't seeing much change in her fluffihood.She started missing Jazzercise. Terribly. So she got the nod from her doctor, and found a new studio, minutes away.She came...
More About: Hands

cue the beastie boys
2008-04-23 15:43:00
I put the buttons on the table and passed out the gloves; the rest was crafty magic. I think I need to invite this kind of creativity, and mess, again. The kids are still talking about it. {It's Wordless Wednesday, yo.}
More About: Beastie Boys , Boys

I was poised to write something else, but then my eyes rolled out of my hea
2008-04-22 17:38:00
I woke up in a mighty good mood, that is, until I caught a segment on GMA, between my morning coffee and my morning monologues, delivered by two chatty offspring.(Today's topics: Bedroom Design for Girls Who Have Outgrown Princess Pink for Heaven's Sake and How Lego Star Wars Transformed my Life in Six Easy Steps.)Juju Chang, with her shiny hair and sweet 5 month old baby boy, introduced the LENA system. A system designed to send moms right over the edge and into a therapist's office to count how many words you say to your child, during the first three years of life. Yes, for a mere $400, you too can place a pager-like monitor on your baby, to track your wordcount on your PC every night.The makers of the LENA device claim that babies need to hear 17,000 words a day - any ol' talking will do - for you to CREATE YOUR VERY OWN PRODIGY their wee little brains to develop and as an added bonus feature, you can also track their babbling and create bar graphs to compare junior to his pe...
More About: Eyes , Write

why I stopped at two
2008-04-21 16:22:00
I don't care what Jack Johnson says. Three is CLEARLY not a magic number.By just adding one little noggin, the fighting increases exponentially.1 sister + 1 brother + 1 good family friend = Evil Tag Teaming and Bickering Galore.I'll admit: There were some sweet moments of quiet, a couple of peace agreements brokered along the way.(And I'm happy to help out when my friends were out of town, really I am.)But that bus can't roll up fast enough for me. Scrubbing toilets and folding clothes all by my lonesome sounds divine.