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Satan Has No Chin
2007-08-28 00:00:00
When we learned irrefutably that Satan has no chin, we began to see him everywhere. Suddenly no-one was safe. We all sensed evil but some appeared to be more susceptible to his influence and quickly succumbed. In the press of the crowd, under the blazing midday sun, in dead night or the long shadows of evening we were on guard but defenceless - it seemed impossible that for so long almost no one had believed in his existence.

Televisions Go To Landfill As Viewers Switch off SBS
2007-08-28 00:00:00
At a time when many Australians are in any case switching off their televisions and downloading TV content from the net, the decision by SBS Television to increase the amount of advertising on its airwaves, and to introduce commercial breaks into programming for the first time, appears at best risky, at worst corrupt and salacious.
More About: Switch , Televisions , Levis , Visions , Witch

How to Submit to an Australian Soldier
2007-08-28 00:00:00
With Australian troops now attempting to enforce a kind of crude security in the East Timorese capital Dili, the citizens of that troubled city have exchanged one mode of unpleasantness for another. Many citizens of East Timor were pleased by the arrival of 1300 gun-wielding grunts from the Australian Defence Force, at least according to the Australian Government and media. But dealing with an inane, brutish Australian soldier who is armed and in fear for his or her life and limb is not always a walk in the park.
More About: Soldier , Submit

Pentagon Failure Highlights Terrorist Competence
2007-08-28 00:00:00
References in Bin Laden's latest message for his adherents to the West's mistreatment of Hamas following its election as the legitimate Government of the Palestinians indicate the recording was likely made this year, say US authorities. But some now suggest the frightening competence of the al Qa'eda leader, who, unlike the American administration, has proved immensely successful in the manipulation of geo-political affairs in recent years, could hint at an alternate explanation for the ongoing invisibility of the ruthless, elusive hero of millions. If Osama is not alive but dead in some little-publicised incident or accident of recent years, the world faces a still more difficult adversary - a strategic genius capable of minute posthumous manipulation of geopolitical affairs with devastating and deadly effect.
More About: Failure , Highlights , Pentagon , Terrorist , Lure

Doctors More Accountable in Post-Saddam Iraq
2007-08-28 00:00:00
The trauma of the endless violence visited upon the people of Iraq in recent years has been exacerbated by a dysfunctional health system previously neglected during the reign of Saddam Hussein and further damaged by deprivations flowing from a decade of sanctions imposed upon the Iraqi population by the munificennce of the international community. But despite the botched efforts of the Americans to make their new middle eastern territory a free market clone of their own cheerfully society there are some signs of emerging measures for social accountability are now being instituted in medical facilities. Salam Ismael, a founding member of the organisation Doctors for Iraq suggest that health professionals are now making new commitments to patients in their care, under the direction of concerned friends and relatives of unfortunate Iraqis who have suffered injury or fallen ill during the poorly conceived Western occupation of their country.
More About: Post

Daily Show Host, Writers Offered Amnesty In Future War Against US
2007-08-28 00:00:00
Some enraged anti-American extremists continue to put the case for an indiscriminate scorched earth policy for all 50 States of the Union, but a more measured approach is in evidence, of late, from the elusive leaders of many of the battalions of a fast-growing, vast and varied anti-American army. In an audio recording made available yesterday to rss feed readers and on internet browsers around the globe, the collective leadership of the dire and determined American foe has issued an edict online promising amnesty and free passage to the host and writers of the single redeeming feature of US culture, the Daily Show hosted by Jon Stewart, in the event of coming large-scale war in an American theatre.
More About: Future , Daily Show , Amnesty

Bleating Piggies Abhor an Interest Rate Rise
2007-08-28 00:00:00
Three years ago when interest rate increases last threatened Australian lifestyles, the Government warned Reserve Bank Governor Ian Macfarlane to stop it if he valued his cojones since there was an election not far off and Macfarlane did. In May 2006 the Reserve Bank has again increased official interest rates, and is again the subject of attack. Except for the resignation of John Anderson, neither the spokesmouths or the issues have altered in the intermediary period. Simon Tennant, for example, is still a cheap trollope working for the Housing Industry.
More About: Interest , Rise , Rate , Interest Rate , Eres

New Australian Fascism Reaches Fever Pitch on ANZAC Day
2007-08-28 00:00:00
Some Australian intellectuals and unconventionals are nervous nowadays of what the future might hold for the Antipodean continent. Where assets allow they are arranging for passports from other countries obtainable through dual-citizenship arrangements, and reluctantly making ready for a rapid departure when things become too dangerous at home. Today, though, on ANZAC Day, a national public holiday that is held to remember those who have fallen in Australia's wars, the focus of authorities and the mob was not on the unAustralian, but the most Australian - those heroes prepared to give their lives (though not in a terrorist, suicide bombing sort of way) for the good of Prime Minister and Country.
More About: Fascism , Pitch , Fever

'Elite Sniper' Self-Sniped In Iraq
2007-08-28 00:00:00
A soldier described an 'elite sniper' of the Australian Defence Force has died after he was accidentally self-sniped while cleaning his weapon in Baghdad yesterday, according to reports in the mainstream media in Australia. The loss of the expert, capable soldier, who died in hospital not long after accurately shooting himself at close range, has been lamented by the Prime Minister and others. The crack sniper will be sorely missed, and the tragedy is felt by all Australians, at least according to a superficial interpretation of appropriate noises made on radio by figures of significance this morning. Amazingly, the introverted sniper is Australia's first casualty in Iraq , despite three years' operation in the country alongside famously trigger happy, inaccurate, murderous and de-brained United States marines.
More About: Elite , Sniper

Iranian President Too Polite to Mention Glaring Western Hypocrisy
2007-08-28 00:00:00
Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has unveiled early evidence of success in a revived uranium enrichment programme that some critics of Iran's government say reflects an intention to acquire to develop nuclear weaponry. But in announcing the advance the Iranian President was too polite to draw attention directly to the details of the glaring hypocrisy of the West on issues of nuclear technology and weaponry.
More About: Hypocrisy , Western , Iranian , Este

The Anthropomorphised Dog
2007-08-28 00:00:00
For too long the mistreatment, persecution and derision of animals that persists in the advanced cultures of the twenty-first century has gone unmentioned and unnoticed. Now, though one eloquent dog has spoken out about his experiences living as a disenfranchised and often cruelly anthropomorphised 'lesser mammal' in a human-dominated civilisation.
More About: Morph

Defence Secretary Retired - Children's Literary Icon To Replace Incompetent
2007-08-28 00:00:00
The bungled, illegal, malingering war on Iraq is now an increasing liability for Republicans in upcoming Congressional and presidential elections in the United States, and pressure has been growing on President George W Bush from all sides to retire US Secretary of Defence Donald Rumsfeld, who many consider largely responsible for the deadly mess and an embarrassment to a generally incompetent Adminstration. Today the President finally acquiesced, and after Donald Rumsfeld's reluctant resignation this morning, Bush wasted no time in making a public announcement as to the unfortunate war-monger's replacement.
More About: Icon , Tired , Tent , Literary

Zones of Chaos
2007-08-28 00:00:00
Speaking at a celebration of the tenth anniversary of the beginning of his regime Prime Minister John Howard has tonight warned of a new danger facing Australians that is even now undermining the continued peaceful existence of communities and homes across the country and rapidly destroying the public's peace of mind. Australia's tonight advised the people terrifying 'Zones of Chaos ' are now in evidence in some Australian homes and communities, particularly those susceptible to the phenomenon as a result of unemployment (the fault of individuals and the previous Labor government, health problems (that Labor state governments and individuals have failed to address), and the dangerous relativistic education provided by modern post-modern teachers.