Amerikan Turk Amerikan Turk Compilation of opinions, ideas and observations about life, religion, politics, social and cultural issues. Articles
Whose Nightmare is this?
2008-05-29 12:48:00 I keep thinking about what a nightmare this situation has become for me and the family.. Then I come to my senses when I consider that Father is the one who is really living in a nightmare right now, and then I want to punch myself and jump off the nearest bridge for being such a pussy.If I knew that I would live for another 40 years, I'd happily split them 50-50 with my father. We'd go into the dark together, 20 years from now.Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry More About: Nightmare
A new day
2008-05-29 09:15:00 It's windy enough this morning that there are little whitecaps all over the water, which we have a clear of, from father's apartment balcony.He's hanging in there. I told him repeatedly that my brother will be here today. His breathing is getting labored. He hasn't taken any food or drink in the last 40 hours because every drop of food causes a gag reflex and a fit of coughing on phlegm that has nested in his throat. He used to be able to clear it and spit but not anymore. The IV doesn't work either- it goes for ten minutes and then backs up and blood is everywhere. His veins are all shot from the chemo treatments.We're just "getting ready" for the inevitable at this point. I'm emotionally drained. Last night I sat with him and told him I love him very much, that I always have.. That he's my champion and hero and not to be afraid..Damn. Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
A new day
2008-05-29 09:07:00 It's windy enough this morning that there are little whitecaps all over the water, which we have a clear of, from father's apartment balcony.He's hanging in there. I told him repeatedly that my brother will be here today. His breathing is getting labored. He hasn't taken any food or drink in the last 40 hours because every drop of food causes a gag reflex and a fit of coughing on phlegm that has nested in his throat. He used to be able to clear it and spit but not anymore. The IV doesn't work either- it goes for ten minutes and then backs up and blood is everywhere. His veins are all shot from the chemo treatments.We're just "getting ready" for the inevitable at this point. I'm emotionally drained. Last night I sat with him and told him I love him very much, that I always have.. That he's my champion and hero and not to be afraid..Damn. Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
45 minute spin
2008-05-28 21:13:00 That's all. Barely 100 watts. Rode past my uncle's waterfront summer condo in Burgaz, which he has owned forever. Nobody home, or at least I assume so- no Opel parked out front with German plates. Even if he was home, I'm not sure if I would have stopped. And if I had, I'm not sure if I would have been very nice to him. He's the oldest of 7 siblings, and he hates my father for a variety of reasons.. Mainly because my father insulted him while in a drunken stupor.. Ironic thing is: When my two teenage uncles used to sneak around getting drunk, my 12 year old father was a witness. Determined to keep him quiet about it, they would pass him drinks too, in return for his silence. And so begins the story of my father's alcoholism. Fast forward 50 years and we find my father on his death bed, and his two older brothers "G-d knows where", and completely oblivious. They can both suck my balls.Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry More About: Spin , Minute
Hondas in disguise
2008-05-28 09:58:00 No Accords in Turkey- it's called Legend here. The economical Honda Fit is called the Jazz for whatever reason. Also, I'm seeing a Land Rover Freelander everywhere I turn. I can barely afford to lease one back home.. How do these poor poor Turks afford them here? There's a 100 percent tax on imports.. And limited financing options. You think you're the shit because you leased an LR2 with no money down and can afford to fill up for $4 a gallon? Take a pill. Get over yourself. The vehicle and the fuel is more than double the cost here, while the Median income is only about $1400 a monthn probably a lot less. Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
Day 4: climber's heaven
2008-05-28 00:06:00 Some corrections.. The main highway which climbs out of Mudanya rises 750 feet in 2-1/2 miles.. The old winding road (that is, the return to Mudanya which I use to get home afterwards) rises to 900 feet (but begins at 200 feet elev) in exactly three miles. I did both climbs again today for the third consecutive day.. And then some.. Today I discovered a road which climbs up out of the valley to a point opposite the city of Bursa to a little "koy" (village) called "Gundogdu".. Which literally means "Rising Sun" or something close.. At the top of this climb, at the fountain of the village mosque, my altimeter read 1200 feet. The view of the city of Bursa down in the valley took my breath away. To see the entirety of a city populated by 2 million.. as though it was painted there by a giant paint brush- something to behold.. My companion and guide on this scenic five mile climb was a 40 year old mountain biker/road race dabbler who had me making 'woman ... More About: Heaven
Day three
2008-05-27 10:44:00 I think I'm losing weight in sympathy for my dad. Eating less.. Riding lots. And climbing galore. Can't swing a dead cat around here without hitting a ball-busting climb.. Later today I'll go out of Mudanya on the main highway with my Polar and get the altitude profile for later. I'm guessing that it climbs about 600 feet in 2-1/2 miles. The other day I climbed it without stressing myself too much, but it turns out that I pushed hard enough that my bar tape unraveled on the tops.. Tonight I'll be meeting up with one of the local Masters for a ride together. His name's Zafer. We tried to rendezvous last night (my 2nd ride of the day) but I took some wrong turns and it didn't work out. In the morning I went out by bike to meet my wife at her mom's house. Since I needed to have street clothes with me, I took the "rescue pack"- my orange adidas back pack that looks a lot like Diego's.. Had to climb the hill out of Mudanya with about 15 extra...
Mudanya-Bursa
2008-05-26 01:51:00 Are separated by 30 km.. I assembled the bike today determined to get back on track. Did not ride this past Mon-Tues-Thurs-Fri-Sat so today was a shock to the system. Headed out in the afternoon heat.. In the direction of Bursa.. Mudanya is the equivalent of Newport.. It's a seaside town about 1/2 hour drive from Bursa/Providence.. There's only two ways out, both from the same road. One requires you to climb a 3 mile hill on a windswept state highway with terribly heavy chip/seal asphalt. The other road is the "old" Mudanya road- used for ages before the highway was built. It climbs for about 4 miles to a higher elevation, switching back and forth through olive orchards until you reach a point where the views are so breath taking that you may as well be looking from the seat of an airplane.. Today I wanted to take the old road but I went past it by accident- the mouth of the road which leads to the climb was so over-developed with housing that I didnt recognize it....
Apologies..
2008-05-25 21:10:00 I'm delivering lots of bad news and I feel badly for being such a Buzz Killington..Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
Sunday morning
2008-05-25 17:16:00 Im wearing the same clothing as yesterday- slept in them. Suitcase and bike are still unpacked. Brought a nurse in who helped put an IV on my father's wrist. We're giving him some serum with sugar and b-c vitamins. We've more or less given up on using modern plumbing.. Will he come around? Stand on his own ever again? Eat? This is hard.. But it could be a lot harder.. If father were awake, we might see and hear and know how he really feels. His unintelligible whispering and blank face expression makes it easy for us.. It hides his pain and his fear- the two things I can't bear to witness.. I fell apart completely last night when I first saw him. My next meltdown will be when I see him cry or wince in pain. Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry More About: Sunday , Morning , Sunday morning
Nothing left to do
2008-05-24 20:36:00 We've been at my father's house for all of 90 minutes. It's 8:50 pm Saturday May 24th. Moments ago I sent my wife to go stay at her mom's with my son. None of us have slept in the past 24 hours, unless numerous 5 minute episodes of passing out in the airplane count..I do not recognize my father's appearance.. And in his incoherence I have doubts about whether he recognizes me. The shock and awe of seeing his wife carry him to the bathroom heimlich style.. Paled in comparison to the moment they emerged from the bathroom.. And father's legs gave out... The same legs that raced bikes 45 years ago.. And I lifted his weak and crumpled body from the floor the way that a father carries his slumbering 5 year old child and I carried him to his bed, for a moment astonished at my burst of strength.. until I realized how much he's wasted away.This has been the most difficult hour of my life. Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry More About: Left
Greetings from Frankfurt
2008-05-24 07:23:00 Three hour layover until our flight to Istanbul starts boarding. Gotta love Lufthansa!! They took the bike case without asking for an extra dime.. Of course it might be because we are entitled to 6 suitcases and only had 4.. The bike case was the lightest piece too.. Maybe they'll nail me on the return leg.. We're docked at a table and chairs in front of a panoramic view of the airfield. It's pretty awesome. The Airbus ride here was six hours, and that plane was huge.. You take a flight of stairs down to the toilets. Private Lcds in front of every seat.. You choose your own movie, cartoon or sitcom. I was seated next to a 350 pound mouth-breather who cursed at my son in German when he accidentally kicked the guy.. I didn't take offense. Germans usually do not seem to be crazy about kids (Sorry Ralf- they're generally just plain cold towards their own kids and especially towards the kids of others) Me, I don't think twice about talking with or winking/smiling ... More About: Frankfurt
It's about time!
2008-05-12 12:46:00 High Gas Prices mean more Bike Sales and RepairsIt's funny- the price of gas in Turkey is about $8-9 a gallon, yet most adults look upon a bicycle as a toy, not as an optional mode of transportation. People are more likely to buy a noise-polluting 50cc scooter than a bicycle.. and never a helmet of course.. More About: Time
Who do you miss?
2008-05-10 04:20:00 You can miss someone whose side you left moments ago. You can miss someone who you haven't seen in a while, or for a very long time. Me. I miss my brother, sister, father, mother.. to be more specific... I miss the times when the five of us were together under one roof. laughing. sleeping. fighting. eating. whispering. shouting. I mourn the end of those days.. however painful.. or sad.. or turbulent.. I mourn the loss of that unity.. the different flight plans of our lives. It's tragic that five family members can be so polarized.. misunderstood.. separate. It's been an emotional period for me, these past few weeks. I hold it together while in the presence of friends, family, co workers.. but occasionally I fall apart like a house of cards.. I let go. I'm overwhelmed. I'm forced to stop and pause.. pull myself together.. tighten my chin strap and get back in the game.. It's not just people we miss. we miss places. time periods.. days. moments. homes and neighborhoods.. views ... More About: Miss
17 days..
2008-04-27 05:37:00 ..since I last bothered to post something here.. and I'm really tired of seeing Little Miss Janus.. aren't you? I'm the worst blogger ever!.. until you consider that most of the blogging action these days has been over at www.bisikletcimurat.blogspot.com and www.m1racing.blogspot.com More About: Days
Baby with two faces worshipped as Goddess..
2008-04-09 06:38:00 .. but completely freaking me out.. I don't know whether to feel pity for her or for myself. Those of us who are free of such deformities- with everything in it's place- we dishonor our perfection and take so much for granted that it sickens me.Lali has a rare condition known as craniofacial duplication, where a single head has two faces. Full Story on CNN In other news.. did you read about the two year old girl beaten to death with a game conroller clenched in the hand of a 26 year old in York, PA? His 19 year old girlfriend, mother of the two year old, couldn't be bothered to notice the painful screeching or intervene. Please lock them both up and lose the key. CNN Story More About: Baby , Faces , Goddess
Olympic Torch Bearers attacked on Galata Bridge
2008-04-05 05:54:00 Turkish riot police detain an unidentified man who tried to attack the torch bearer as Chinese security members (in blue) secure the torch bearer during the Olympic torch relay over Galata Bridge in Istanbul April 3, 2008. The motive of the attack was not known immediately. REUTERS/Fatih Saribas More About: Attacked , Torch
"Ground Control" by Achmet Ogut
2008-04-05 05:53:00 A women walks over the artwork "Ground control" by Turkish artist Achmet Ogut made of 400 square meters of bitumen during the press preview of the 5th Berlin Biennial for contemporary art in Berlin April 3, 2008. The show called 'When Things Cast No Shadow' is exhibiting international contemporary artists in four locations in the capital and will be open to the public from April 5. REUTERS/Fabrizio Bensch More About: Control
Gray Wolf: Still endangered?
2008-03-29 05:45:00 Gray Wolves aren't very popular anymore.. Do you like Gray Wolves? Maybe not.. but if you were under attack from three different sides you might pray for a Gray Wolf to come and fight for you.. More About: Endangered , Gray
He's going the distance.. he's going for speed..
2008-03-28 14:21:00 Funny song.. Long week, but it went by fast! Here we are on Friday.. and with rain threatening all week, it's a surprise that I managed to commute to work by bike every singe day (including today!) I am very happy about that. Happiness for me usually involves doing things I don't feel like doing, but which I know I must do.. Discipline. Keeping promises to myself. All tricked out in my new bike uniforms, I feel pretty good. The whole team looks great. Looking good is a part of feeling good, no denying that.. or at least that the reverse is true. Selling kid's bikes! We're going to grow this business if it kills us. Lots of incredible ideas and plans have been developing behind the scenes between dear wife and I. The "blogsite was updated recently, mainly to announce the arrival of new colors of the LikeaBike Jumper- red, white and blue. See for yourself. We sold a few bikes this past week and that's always great. I love it when the Crackberry goes off to announce ... More About: Speed
Aren't we cute?
2008-03-24 05:20:00 Ebru and I had dinner at "10 Prime Steak and Sushi" restaurant in Providence last night. The dessert menu was in 3D! Good times. More About: Cute
Day one of my 38th year..
2008-03-19 19:30:00 ..and I discover how many forums and websites know my date of birth....Father is in the ER.. in poor condition but stable. Time to get ready.. hazirlan..This birthday sucks balls.. I'm a hollow shell of a person. It's one of those days when you think about taking a wrong turn someplace and never looking back. Just go. Away. For a little while. More About: Year
Arthur C. Clarke dies in his 91st year
2008-03-19 02:16:00 "In a videotaped 90th birthday message to fans, Clarke said he still hoped to see some sign of intelligent life beyond Earth, more work on alternatives to fossil fuels -- and "closer to home," an end to the 25-year civil war in Sri Lanka between the government and ethnic Tamil separatists."CNN reportAs a huge sci-fi fan who used to read a book a week without fail.. this news stops me in my tracks. -AT More About: Arthur , Year , Dies
I am so not into this right now..
2008-03-18 04:25:00 Forgive me as my bicycle, my racing team and my training/racing become the center of the universe for a while..One piece of good news: Remember how our furnace cracked and burned when the low water cut off failed? Well our home owner's insurance company covered the cost of the new furnace! (except for a deductible) Get Met. It pays!Other good news: Today's production meeting.. boss receives an e-mail on his Blackberry from accounting (which I am CC'ed on) Five minutes later the same e-mail arrives on my Blackberry. "Oh look, a $47,000 check came in from so and so".. Boss looks at me and says"You JUST received that e-mail??" Yuppers. And he promptly called the IT guy and ordered me up a new Blackberry. Mine is as old as dirt, a hand-me down. Everyone else has the latest shit.. So I get an upgrade.. Woo-hoo!Last bit of good news: After much nail biting and fretting and cursing.. our racing team's apparel order is finally on it's way to us from abroad (no not from a woman, from fa...
Isparta Bound Jet Crashes in Keciborlu
2007-11-30 05:57:00 "The plane, which was carrying 49 passengers and seven crew, was en route from Istanbul to Isparta when the pilot radioed the tower, saying he was starting his descent. The flight never arrived at the Isparta airport, disappearing around 2 a.m."(7 p.m. ET Thursday). More About: Bound , Crashes
Reuters Slideshow of Homeless People
2007-11-29 16:47:00 To me, these photographs really feel like a swift kick in the chest. I know they're a little dated, but doesn't it amaze you how strong, resilient and adaptive children are? I'm dying to know the stories behind these people's circumstances. There are a million ways to become poor. What was their path? If these photos don't choke you up or make your eyes misty, then check yourself for a pulse.. or have children- you probably don't have any. Or picture your young niece or nephew nuzzling the neck of their penniless mother or father. That's all kids need. Loving parents to cling to, caring parents to protect them. When my son Reis and I share a bed together, he falls asleep with his arm around my neck as if the world would end if I left his side. Here's the whole slideshow A homeless Indian woman holds her son inside her makeshift house under a bridge in New Delhi, India, July 30, 2005. REUTERS/Adnan Abidi A homeless Indian man sleeps beside his child... More About: People , Reuters , Homeless , Slideshow , Mele
Hella Good: The Greek Military in Beenies and Mini Skirts
2007-11-27 21:15:00 ..and cute vests. I am sure to catch hell for poking fun, but so be it. Better men have done worse. When will someone realize that this is by far the LEAST intimidating military uniform on earth?! I know it has historic significance and I know it is honorable for these men to wear it.. but.. I'm more likely to run for my life from a 14 year old LA "gangsta" than from one of these guys. The brutal truth. Please enlighten me.. Is this purely ceremonial? If it is, kind of like the Turkish "Mehter", then I'll understand. A Greek army officer adjusts the guard of honor before a visit by Albanian President Bamir Topi in Athens, Greece, November 26, 2007. REUTERS/John Kolesidis More About: Military , Skirts , Mini , Good
Kurds in Diyarbakir rally, stone police
More articles from this author:2007-11-26 19:24:00 Only Turkey seems to give it's hostile occupants (Kurds ) more freedoms in the face of a growing threat to security and an increased number of body bags occupied by Turkish soldiers. Does DTP stand for "Destabilize Turkey Party"? A supporter of the pro-Kurdish DTP party flashes a victory sign as he waves a flag of the illegal Kurdistan Workers Party (PKK) during a rally in Diyarbakir, Turkey, November 25, 2007. REUTERS/Osman Orsal Riot police protect themselves behind their shields from stones thrown by protesters following a rally by pro-Kurdish DTP party in Diyarbakir, Turkey, November 25, 2007. REUTERS/Osman Orsal More About: Police , Rally , Stone 1, 2, 3, 4 |
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