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Ralph Nader Announces Candidacy, Millions Don't Care
2008-02-26 20:04:00 Ralph Nader Announces Candidacy , Millions Don't Care Ralph Nader Unsafe at Any SpeedMan that many Democrats say cost Gore the 2000 election, enters 2008 race.Ralph Nader, who has spent the last 4 years completing construction of giant hand gliding wings that he hopes will resemble a giant bird of the prehistoric era, announced on Sunday that he would again run for President. "You see," Nader told , &nbs... More About: Ralph Nader
Hillary Clinton Truly Hurt by Barack Obama
2008-02-26 19:07:00 Hillary Clinton Truly Hurt by Barack Obama Hillary Clinton was in a cleaning frenzy last night. Like most women, much to husband Bill???s chagrin, Hillary resorts to obsessive housework when unfairly offended. Arriving home after an arduous day of supporting his wife???s presidential campaign, Bill found Hillary stifling hot tears while mopping their kitchen???s already pristine hardwood floors. ???She tried to pretend she just got some sort of cleaner in her eye,??? Bill told a friend, ???but I kno... More About: Hillary Clinton
Hillary Clinton Truly Hurt by Barack Obama
2008-02-26 19:07:00 Hillary Clinton Truly Hurt by Barack Obama Hillary Clinton was in a cleaning frenzy last night. Like most women, much to husband Bill’s chagrin, Hillary resorts to obsessive housework when unfairly offended. Arriving home after an arduous day of supporting his wife’s presidential campaign, Bill found Hillary stifling hot tears while mopping their kitchen’s already pristine hardwood floors. “She tried to pretend she just got some sort of cleaner in her eye,” Bill told a friend, “but I kno... More About: Hillary Clinton
Al Gore To Lead The Super Delagates
2008-02-24 10:58:00 "I told tipper that we are gonna have to tevo Lost this Thursday so I can meet with the super delegates," Gore said this weekend. Gore did not specify which Super delegates are considered the most Super, but Big Al thinks he can sway them. Aquaman, is expected to be part of this meeting, and like Gore he is a very big uncommitted Super delegate. So far Gore has had a very low presence, but throughout the democratic contest for president he has been a sought after voice. Gore, who has been focusing on trying to keep his neck fat from taking over his face, has spent most of his days thinking of new inventions. This year he has had mixed success from his invention the iphone, but now Gore has turned his attention to the super delegate crises. Gore is a party man and does not want to go into the convention without a nominee, "If necessary me and Tipper will make out un... More About: Al Gore , Lead , The Super
Al Gore To Lead The Super Delagates
2008-02-24 10:58:00 "I told tipper that we are gonna have to tevo Lost this Thursday so I can meet with the super delegates," Gore said this weekend. Gore did not specify which Super delegates are considered the most Super, but Big Al thinks he can sway them. Aquaman, is expected to be part of this meeting, and like Gore he is a very big uncommitted Super delegate. So far Gore has had a very low presence, but throughout the democratic contest for president he has been a sought after voice. Gore, who has been focusing on trying to keep his neck fat from taking over his face, has spent most of his days thinking of new inventions. This year he has had mixed success from his invention the iphone, but now Gore has turned his attention to the super delegate crises. Gore is a party man and does not want to go into the convention without a nominee, "If necessary me and Tipper will make out un... More About: Al Gore , Lead , The Super
Hillary Clinton is a Lying Sack of Shit
2008-02-24 09:01:00 Hillary Clinton is a Lying Sack of Shit , and could somebody please do something about her big fat ass? "Shame on you Barack Obama" Hillary shrieked today like somebody had just dumped 5 gallons of pig blood all over her. At event that they must have been passing out oxycontin pills at the door, Hillary had the Clinton audacity to accuse Obama of nefarious campaign tactics. Political pundits everywhere immediately tagged this as a sad and desperate act of a candidate who can not win. And unless Obama is found passed out and naked with a dead Latino boy, Clinton has no chance. But here at Blackdog we just want to media to recognize how crazy big Hillary's butt is, so without further ado enjoy some Hillary's butt is so big jokes. Hillary's ass is so big that the department of education has asked it to do a public speaking tour of high schools to talk about the dangers of obesity.Hillary's ass is so big that Kobe Bryant has taken the precauti... More About: Hillary Clinton , Hillary
Hillary Clinton is a Lying Sack of Shit
2008-02-24 09:01:00 Hillary Clinton is a Lying Sack of Shit , and could somebody please do something about her big fat ass? "Shame on you Barack Obama" Hillary shrieked today like somebody had just dumped 5 gallons of pig blood all over her. At event that they must have been passing out oxycontin pills at the door, Hillary had the Clinton audacity to accuse Obama of nefarious campaign tactics. Political pundits everywhere immediately tagged this as a sad and desperate act of a candidate who can not win. And unless Obama is found passed out and naked with a dead Latino boy, Clinton has no chance. But here at Blackdog we just want to media to recognize how crazy big Hillary's butt is, so without further ado enjoy some Hillary's butt is so big jokes. Hillary's ass is so big that the department of education has asked it to do a public speaking tour of high schools to talk about the dangers of obesity.Hillary's ass is so big that Kobe Bryant has taken the precauti... More About: Hillary Clinton , Hillary
Hillary Clinton, Meets Secretly With Destro,
2008-02-24 05:39:00 These are the desperate hours for the Clinton campaign, as yesterday she met secretly with weapons specialist and international terrorist Destro. Like Adolf Hitler in last days of the third reich, Hillary Clinton and her staff have become increasingly desperate and delusional. Many staffers have simply abandoned the cause. One disillusioned former staffer, who would not be named for this story, has found the only way he can make a living in the aftermath, is by catching rattlesnakes in the desert and trying to sell them to pet stores. "I am just not fit for any other kind of work mister," the staffer tried to explain to mall security.Hillary herself, has broken the stated conditions of her parole, by again writing erotic fan mail to Dolly Parton. But perhaps the most disturbing development is her new efforts to reach out to Destro. In the 80's it was well documented that Destro sold and made weapons for the the international terrori...
Hillary Clinton, Meets Secretly With Destro,
2008-02-24 05:39:00 These are the desperate hours for the Clinton campaign, as yesterday she met secretly with weapons specialist and international terrorist Destro. Like Adolf Hitler in last days of the third reich, Hillary Clinton and her staff have become increasingly desperate and delusional. Many staffers have simply abandoned the cause. One disillusioned former staffer, who would not be named for this story, has found the only way he can make a living in the aftermath, is by catching rattlesnakes in the desert and trying to sell them to pet stores. "I am just not fit for any other kind of work mister," the staffer tried to explain to mall security.Hillary herself, has broken the stated conditions of her parole, by again writing erotic fan mail to Dolly Parton. But perhaps the most disturbing development is her new efforts to reach out to Destro. In the 80's it was well documented that Destro sold and made weapons for the the international terrori...
Bill Clinton Calls Himself The First Latino President While Campaigning In
2008-02-20 07:47:00 "I have lived most of my life like as a Mexican, I am the first Latino President ," Clinton said while campaigning in Texas for his wife. Wearing a poncho and sombrero and armed with his new invention, the Doritto Burrito, Former President Bill Clinton continues his downward spiral into disgrace. "Hey Hombres," Clinton, yelled to a random group of young Latino's, "Uncle Bill is here with the "Doritto Burrito, and it tastes so good it will make you want vote for my wife." The Hillary Clinton campaign will not comment on the actions of the former President. "The truth is," Bill said to anyone who would listen, " Barack Ombama hates Our ... More About: Calls
Bill Clinton Calls Himself The First Latino President While Campaigning In
2008-02-20 07:47:00 "I have lived most of my life like as a Mexican, I am the first Latino President ," Clinton said while campaigning in Texas for his wife. Wearing a poncho and sombrero and armed with his new invention, the Doritto Burrito, Former President Bill Clinton continues his downward spiral into disgrace. "Hey Hombres," Clinton, yelled to a random group of young Latino's, "Uncle Bill is here with the "Doritto Burrito, and it tastes so good it will make you want vote for my wife." The Hillary Clinton campaign will not comment on the actions of the former President. "The truth is," Bill said to anyone who would listen, " Barack Ombama hates Our ... More About: Calls
Castro Resigns Due To Depression Over Heath Ledger's Death
2008-02-20 05:03:00 Castro Resigns Due To Depression Over Heath Ledger 's Death "I knew Heath was special since I first saw him in 10 Things I Hate About You" Castro said in his address this afternoon. Like most of us Fidel Castro has been in a major funk since Heath Ledger's death. "Poor Fidel has been in almost constant conversation with Mary Kate Olsen," said Castro's Brother Raul. Castro has been holed up in his master bedroom with an unending supply of rum and the movie a "Knights Tale" on repeat. "Just let me be taken to Heaven so I can be with Heath again" Castro was overheard saying to his priest. But maybe that's why God took Heath so soon, as long as we had him on earth there was no need to think about heaven. More About: Castro
Castro Resigns Due To Depression Over Heath Ledger's Death
2008-02-20 05:03:00 Castro Resigns Due To Depression Over Heath Ledger's Death "I knew Heath was special since I first saw him in 10 Things I Hate About You" Castro said in his address this afternoon. Like most of us Fidel Castro has been in a major funk since Heath Ledger's death. "Poor Fidel has been in almost constant conversation with Mary Kate Olsen," said Castro's Brother Raul. Castro has been holed up in his master bedroom with an unending supply of rum and the movie a "Knights Tale" on repeat. "Just let me be taken to Heaven so I can be with Heath again" Castro was overheard saying to his priest. But maybe that's why God took Heath so soon, as long as we had him on earth there was no need to think about heaven. More About: Castro
New Holocaust Ride to Open At Disney World Iran
2008-02-18 14:39:00 "I like it even better than Mr. Jews Wild Cattle Train Ride ," Said Iran President, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad.The new ride called the roller coaster of lies will open next week in the fantasy land section of Disney World Iran. Disney World Iran has been open for over two years and like Euro Disney has had to make some cultural readjustments to keep attendance up. For example instead of Hall of presidents they have the hall of whores, where park goers can stone real wives that have acted unfaithfully. Also on "Star Tours" 3-cpo is put to death daily for being a homosexual. More About: Open
New Holocaust Ride to Open At Disney World Iran
2008-02-18 14:39:00 "I like it even better than Mr. Jews Wild Cattle Train Ride ," Said Iran President, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad.The new ride called the roller coaster of lies will open next week in the fantasy land section of Disney World Iran. Disney World Iran has been open for over two years and like Euro Disney has had to make some cultural readjustments to keep attendance up. For example instead of Hall of presidents they have the hall of whores, where park goers can stone real wives that have acted unfaithfully. Also on "Star Tours" 3-cpo is put to death daily for being a homosexual. More About: Open
Hillary Clinton Denies Fart While Campaigning
2008-02-18 14:36:00 Hillary Clinton Denies Fart While Campaigning . Whoever denies supplies it? Clinton covers up fart but she can not cover up the face of the innocent boy behind her. Like the little boy in the tree, in the story of the emperor and his new clothes, there was only one to speak to truth as Hillary let go of something she has been holding onto since Iowa. The Clinton camp was quick to silence then noise and attempted to attribute the smell to global warming. Al Gore would not comment. More About: Hillary Clinton , Hillary
Hillary Clinton Denies Fart While Campaigning
2008-02-18 14:36:00 Hillary Clinton Denies Fart While Campaigning . Whoever denies supplies it? Clinton covers up fart but she can not cover up the face of the innocent boy behind her. Like the little boy in the tree, in the story of the emperor and his new clothes, there was only one to speak to truth as Hillary let go of something she has been holding onto since Iowa. The Clinton camp was quick to silence then noise and attempted to attribute the smell to global warming. Al Gore would not comment. More About: Hillary Clinton , Hillary
Picture of Barak Obama and his white girlfriend from college released to pr
2008-02-18 14:32:00 Picture of Barak Obama and his white girlfriend from college released to press by Clinton Camp. Hillary Clinton again has responded with racial politics when faced with a tight contest. On the eve of super Tuesday the Clinton camp has leaked pictures of Obama and a white girlfriend from college. "Well I guess we all know what he will be up to in the White House." Said a smug Bill Clinton campaigning in a Louisiana restaurant. No word yet from the Obama camp. More About: College , Girlfriend , Picture
Picture of Barak Obama and his white girlfriend from college released to pr
2008-02-18 14:32:00 Picture of Barak Obama and his white girlfriend from college released to press by Clinton Camp. Hillary Clinton again has responded with racial politics when faced with a tight contest. On the eve of super Tuesday the Clinton camp has leaked pictures of Obama and a white girlfriend from college. "Well I guess we all know what he will be up to in the White House." Said a smug Bill Clinton campaigning in a Louisiana restaurant. No word yet from the Obama camp. More About: College , Girlfriend , Picture
Why Barack Is Winning
2008-02-18 14:27:00 Barack Obama wins the most states, the most delegates,and the popular vote, but most important of all he is not a complete and total douche.We are responsible people here at Blackdog Press. We believe in equal ridicule of everyone, we are for oral sex and freedom of speech, very often at the same time. We do not believe that Barack Obama walks on water, or is a movement, but for the love of Christ we just want to light on fire our own outgoing shit and deliver down Hillary Clinton's mouth. John Wayne Gasey would be our preferred choice to baby sit our children if it came down to a decision. What is decent about Obama is that he is not a complete and total Douche Bag. We all have done drugs and anyone who hasn't, should not be in any position of power. What exactly did you do at Woodstock Hillary? Where you the one chaste sober person of your generation, or did you get wasted and pass your body around like a joint on a Willie Nelson concert tour. Just get the fuck out of town you l... More About: Barack , Winning
Why Barack Is Winning
2008-02-18 14:27:00 Barack Obama wins the most states, the most delegates,and the popular vote, but most important of all he is not a complete and total douche.We are responsible people here at Blackdog Press. We believe in equal ridicule of everyone, we are for oral sex and freedom of speech, very often at the same time. We do not believe that Barack Obama walks on water, or is a movement, but for the love of Christ we just want to light on fire our own outgoing shit and deliver down Hillary Clinton's mouth. John Wayne Gasey would be our preferred choice to baby sit our children if it came down to a decision. What is decent about Obama is that he is not a complete and total Douche Bag. We all have done drugs and anyone who hasn't, should not be in any position of power. What exactly did you do at Woodstock Hillary? Where you the one chaste sober person of your generation, or did you get wasted and pass your body around like a joint on a Willie Nelson concert tour. Just get the fuck out of town you l... More About: Barack , Winning
Al Roker Gets In Fight With Mathew Fox On The Today Show
2008-02-18 14:23:00 "Tell me the location of Lost island, or by god I will hunt down Hannah Montana and impregnate her," Al Roker yelled to Mathew Fox on an interview during the Today Show . Al Roker has long stated his ambition to find lost island and live there forever. "all the answers are there, they just need a leader who will make sex slaves out of the women." Roker has said before. Al, who now only calls himself the Weatherman, then asked Fox if he would help him do a home invasion. "I want to force a father to have sex with his daughter, and a mother to have sex with her son," Al told Fox. Producers of the today show are happy to point out that Al is more popular than ever, and part of his appeal to the public is straight talk to the american people. More About: Fight , Today Show , The Today Show
Al Roker Gets In Fight With Mathew Fox On The Today Show
2008-02-18 14:23:00 "Tell me the location of Lost island, or by god I will hunt down Hannah Montana and impregnate her," Al Roker yelled to Mathew Fox on an interview during the Today Show . Al Roker has long stated his ambition to find lost island and live there forever. "all the answers are there, they just need a leader who will make sex slaves out of the women." Roker has said before. Al, who now only calls himself the Weatherman, then asked Fox if he would help him do a home invasion. "I want to force a father to have sex with his daughter, and a mother to have sex with her son," Al told Fox. Producers of the today show are happy to point out that Al is more popular than ever, and part of his appeal to the public is straight talk to the american people. More About: Fight , Today Show , The Today Show
MCCain Again Taunts Conservative Voters
2008-02-18 14:19:00 In his his support of the openly Homosexual group GI in Super Tuesday Victory speech. GI Joe famous for battling Cobra and Destro in the 8o's, is also famous for being at the forefront of the AIDS crises, with many of its members falling victim to the disease. Despite the fact that GI joe is on openly Homosexual community, John Mccasin has been proud and vocal in there support for him. More About: Conservative , Voters
MCCain Again Taunts Conservative Voters
2008-02-18 14:19:00 In his his support of the openly Homosexual group GI in Super Tuesday Victory speech. GI Joe famous for battling Cobra and Destro in the 8o's, is also famous for being at the forefront of the AIDS crises, with many of its members falling victim to the disease. Despite the fact that GI joe is on openly Homosexual community, John Mccasin has been proud and vocal in there support for him. More About: Conservative , Voters
Bush Ransacks Oval Office In Search Of The Book Of Secrets
2008-02-18 14:13:00 Bush Ransacks Oval Office In Search Of The Book Of Secrets Inspired by his favorite new Holly Wood movie, National Treasure Book OF Secrets, President Bush has taken it upon himself to find the treasure in the movie. "They say I Am lame duck President, but how many treasures did Clinton find in his last years of office" Bush proudly told a White House Maid. White House staffers tried to prevent the President from seeing the latest National Treasure, knowing that he may get too excited about finding the imaginary treasure. "The President can be tricky when he wants to be," said an unnamed staffer, "He told us he was going to another showing of Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium, but then he went in to the treasure movie while the secret service were busy hitting on the teenage girls at the theater." Staffers are always a few steps ahead of the President and his passions, and have already hidden the "Book of Secrets" under Bush's pillow.&n... More About: Bush
Bush Ransacks Oval Office In Search Of The Book Of Secrets
2008-02-18 14:13:00 Bush Ransacks Oval Office In Search Of The Book Of Secrets Inspired by his favorite new Holly Wood movie, National Treasure Book OF Secrets, President Bush has taken it upon himself to find the treasure in the movie. "They say I Am lame duck President, but how many treasures did Clinton find in his last years of office" Bush proudly told a White House Maid. White House staffers tried to prevent the President from seeing the latest National Treasure, knowing that he may get too excited about finding the imaginary treasure. "The President can be tricky when he wants to be," said an unnamed staffer, "He told us he was going to another showing of Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium, but then he went in to the treasure movie while the secret service were busy hitting on the teenage girls at the theater." Staffers are always a few steps ahead of the President and his passions, and have already hidden the "Book of Secrets" under Bush's pillow.&n... More About: Bush
MCCain Again Taunts Conservative Voters On Super Tuesday
2008-02-07 02:14:00 In his his support of the openly Homosexual group GI in Super Tuesday Victory speech. GI Joe famous for battling Cobra and Destro in the 8o's, is also famous for being at the forefront of the AIDS crises, with many of its members falling victim to the disease. Despite the fact that GI joe is on openly Homosexual community, John Mccasin has been proud and vocal in there support for him. More About: Conservative , Voters , Super Tuesday
Al Roker Gets In Fight With Mathew Fox On The Today Show
2008-02-07 00:28:00 "Tell me the location of Lost island, or by god I will hunt down Hannah Montana and impregnate her," Al Roker yelled to Mathew Fox on an interview during the Today Show . Al Roker has long stated his ambition to find lost island and live there forever. "all the answers are there, they just need a leader who will make sex slaves out of the women." Roker has said before. Al, who now only calls himself the Weatherman, then asked Fox if he would help him do a home invasion. "I want to force a father to have sex with his daughter, and a mother to have sex with her son," Al told Fox. Producers of the today show are happy to point out that Al is more popular than ever, and part of his appeal to the public is straight talk to the american people. More About: Fight , Today Show , The Today Show
Barack Obama Wins Super Tuesday
More articles from this author:2008-02-06 09:11:00 Barack Obama wins the most states, the most delegates,and the popular vote, but most important of all he is not a complete and total douche.We are responsible people here at Blackdog Press. We believe in equal ridicule of everyone, we are for oral sex and freedom of speech, very often at the same time. We do not believe that Barack Obama walks on water, or is a movement, but for the love of Christ we just want to light on fire our own outgoing shit and deliver down Hillary Clinton's mouth. John Wayne Gasey would be our preferred choice to baby sit our children if it came down to a decision. What is decent about Obama is that he is not a complete and total Douche Bag. We all have done drugs and anyone who hasn't, should not be in any position of power. What exactly did you do at Woodstock Hillary? Where you the one chaste sober person of your generation, or did you get wasted and pass your body around like a joint on a Willie Nelson concert tour. Just get the fuck out of town you l... More About: Barack Obama , Super , Barack , Tuesday 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 |
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