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An Alphabetical Journey of the Places I Went in (and Around) the Twin Citie
2008-06-09 05:32:00 1. Axel's. "You know," I said to the Bryant Lake Bowl audience on Thursday, "Minnesota is nothing like the movie, Fargo," because I hadn't run into anyone as eccentric or at least accented like the characters in the Coen Brothers film. The BLB audience assured me that Fargo was closer to the truth than I had witnessed in my short time in the state, an assertion that was confirmed when I had dinner with Brandon, his mom, and Kellie at Axel's, a fancy steak and seafood restaurant in Mendota, a town with a population of 197, just south of St. Paul. The waitress spoke with the accent and carried Minnesota Nice in every pore on her face. In the car after dinner tonight, Brandon told me to run back in so I could interview her for this blog, but I have to be up at 4:30 tomorrow morning to catch a plane to New York. This bitch is tired.2. Dixie's. Sunday Champagne Brunch here is a real culinary treat, made even more complete with a glorious chocolate fountain that you could dip strawber...
By: Bamboo Nation
Seattle Wants to Make Out With Me (Again)
2008-06-04 19:35:00 If I ever make it up to Washington state, I'm going to visit all the Twin Peaks shooting locations with a divining rod to see if I can find gemstones that Kyle McLaughlin may have left behind. I now have good reason to go?my handy dandy Google Alert just informed me that my epic exploration of Asian America (and space aliens!), The Theory of Everything, will open SIS Productions' 2009 season in Seattle. (You know, if it weren't for Google, I would have no idea what was happening with my career.)For no reason other than ancient Chinese intuition (yeah, there's some Chinese blood pumping through my Thai veins), I've always felt a strange affinity with Seattle, even though I've never been there or know much about the city. Seattle creamed its jeans when my Big Hunk o' Burnin' Love played there last year, so I get the feeling that the city will love me and I will love the city back and we'll make out in the backseat of a taxi.
By: Bamboo Nation
Revisiting "Gaysian Heroes"
2008-06-02 06:01:00 Speaking of Arthur Dong, remember the Gallery of Gaysian Heroes that I complied for AOL's now-defunct QueerSighted last year? Of course you don't remember. Your constant cocaine use has seriously damaged your long-term memory. So, once again, let's celebrate the community to which I so proudly belong (and should rule over with an iron fist). Go here.
By: Bamboo Nation
Me Put Pee-Pee in Your Coke
2008-06-02 05:05:00 From now on, whenever I see Roger Ebert, I'm going to point a finger in the air, roll my neck, and yell, "You go, girl!" Some years ago at the Sundance Film Festival, Ebert famously defended the film, Better Luck Tomorrow, against an outraged Caucasian audience member who felt that the Asian American-made BLT was an amoral affront to the Asian-American community. What I didn't know?until I saw Arthur Dong's juicy new documentary, Hollywood Chinese, this afternoon?was that Ebert's impassioned, vociferous outburst was recorded. Skip to the 2:35 mark in this video clip (from a BLT DVD extra, I believe) to see that electrifying moment:That moment is among many enlightening pleasures in the endlessly fascinating Hollywood Chinese, which digs into 100 years of film history to trace the trajectory of the Chinese in American film.In another eye-opening segment, Dong discovers two reels of the movie, The Curse of Quon Gwon, now considered to be the first-ever piece of Asian-American cine...
By: Bamboo Nation
All Dressed Up and Nothing to Say
2008-04-29 09:14:00 As East West Players' 42nd Anniversary Visionary Awards Dinner was wrapping up tonight, I called Loren and informed him, "Hey, that black guy from Star Trek: The Next Generation is here."Loren, ever the Trekkie, screamed, "Geordi?! You have to go talk to him!""Why? I've never seen the show.""But...but...but...!" Loren pleaded.And I've never seen Roots or Reading Rainbow either, so the only genuine thing that could come out of my mouth would've been something distasteful like, "Hey, you're that black guy from Star Trek: The Next Generation!" And then I would've walked away shamefully, as he shook his head in disdain.EWP staples like the always reliable Amy Hill, Alec Mapa, and George Takei were there, but it was fun seeing people like that black guy from Star Trek: The Next Generation and American Idol's Randy Jackson. (FYI: Roots is now in my Netflix queue, people! Jeez!)Honored with fabulous awards tonight were Dancing With the Stars' Carrie Ann Inaba, playwright Velina Has...
By: Bamboo Nation
No Flags. No Fun.
2008-04-25 10:42:00 Am I overly sensitive or are the new Six Flags' Magic Mountain commercials, which feature a disembodied Asian head screaming in a thick accent, just this side of offensive? Witness:Let me know what you think:Click Here to Take Poll if You Can't See the Green Poll Box Above
By: Bamboo Nation
Will the Other Prince Beat Me Up If I Show Up in His Hometown of Minneapoli
2008-03-18 08:02:00 Through no effort of my own, I somehow ended up slated to be a part of the 2nd Asian American Theater Conference, which is taking place this June in Minneapolis. Within the past couple of weeks, I received unexpected e-mails telling me that I was being flown out to be a part of a panel on funny playwrights (apparently, I am a playwright, and I am funny) and to have a staged reading of a play of mine. I suppose I should not put out effort more often?more things would happen in my life.Since I'm going to be out there, Brandon thinks we should set up a Jukebox Stories gig. He can draw a few fans out that way, and I think I have a handful of Minnesota readers?is that true? Is it? Will you come see my show and spank my ass?! Will you?! Your comments here will determine if we have a big enough Minneapolis draw. Otherwise, I'm going to the movies instead.
By: Bamboo Nation
The Mind of the Ethnic Buyer
2008-01-15 19:37:00 I don't know what I want. Fortunately, a new marketing study on ethnic car buyers does. Research concluded, when shopping for a car, I want something "Pleasant yet Powerful, Easy Going yet Protective?all with modern design and technology." An Acura MDX would do perfectly fine. After all, it's all in my "vehicle DNA." I'm not kidding. We all have "vehicle DNA." And no matter how many times I mention "vehicle DNA," I will always use quotes around "vehicle DNA." The study also says:Differences that clearly stand out with African Americans are greater desires for success and the ability to show it. African Americans are much more likely to advocate vehicles that express their individuality and success to family and friends. Latinos have a greater concern for the impact on the environment while also exhibiting a greater desire to experience exhilarating driving and performance than others. Asian Americans have stronger demands for a balanced, complete vehicle performance and st...
By: Bamboo Nation
Smarter Than You
2007-12-24 20:56:00 Sometimes I go to fancy Hollywood parties, and, when well-paid TV writers find out that I'm a playwright, they almost immediately sink in their chair a bit as the weight of inferiority hangs off their shoulders. You see, a lot of people in Hollywood may occasionally mock the theater industry, but they do seem to possess a misplaced reverence for it. "I could never write a play," a TV scribe once told me. "I'm not smart enough."I cocked my head. "What?!"I've always been aware, of course, that the general population, not just Hollywood, views theater as the playpen of intellectual elitists. And a lot of the plays and productions that get lauded seem to support that notion.That's why I've spent a good chunk of my career trying to shift perceptions, subvert expectations, and give theater back to "the people," folks who don't typically go to the theater?youth, minorities, the disenfranchised.I do get the feeling sometimes that theater people also possess a misplaced reverence?for t...
By: Bamboo Nation
Nerd Raves; Or: Required Reading From the Asian-American Theater Canon
2007-12-22 22:11:00 This week marked the end of my Writing Is Rewriting class and staged reading series at East West Players, where six students took their plays to the next level and presented them to real live audiences. After debriefing last night over dinner at Chop Suey, a Chinese restaurant in Little Tokyo (a paradox lost to middle America, I'm sure), we partied late into the evening in the EWP dressing rooms, where we sat around eating snacks and talking about Asian-American theater. Since we eschewed traditional bar-hopping festivities, someone described our night as a sort of "nerd rave."We forced ourselves to collectively come up with a list of six?and just six?plays that are required reading for anyone who wants to understand the scope and depth of Asian-American theater. After much discussion and painful elimination, this is what we came up with:The Year of the Dragon by Frank ChinAnd the Soul Shall Dance by Wakako YamauchiM Butterfly by David Henry HwangYankee Dawg You Die by Philip Kan G...
By: Bamboo Nation
Yummy in My Tummy!
2007-11-29 07:58:00 I pass through L.A.'s Chinatown every Tuesday on my way to my playwriting workshop, a journey that is a weekly reminder that I haven't been to Golden Dragon Restaurant in while?one of my favorite dim sum spots. I used to go a few times every month. (And I would witness Loren ordering dishes as if he were fighting famine, but the only thing he was fighting was his own good sense and my yelling: "Stop ordering so much!") I love me some hai gow (steamed shrimp dumplings), but their shrimp wonton soup is so ridiculously good that my mouth is honestly watering as I type these words.I noticed that Golden Dragon's Yelp page features mixed reviews?some people love it ("It makes me weak in the knees"), some people hate it ("I will never go to this shithole restaurant again"). I wonder if you need to have some Asian blood in you to dig the place. Certainly, if you are Caucasian and go there, you will very likely be the only white person in the entire restaurant. That is not an exaggeratio...
By: Bamboo Nation
Race Wars
2007-11-07 19:10:00 When Loren and Gabriel started drinking Smirnoff Ice in my apartment the other day, I hurled a series of appropriate insults at them: "Smirnoff Ice?! What are you?sorority girls? What next?you want me to get you some peach wine coolers? How 'bout after that?you wanna go to Chevy's and order margaritas?" But I did recognize it as a perfect opportunity to throw on Madea's Family Reunion, Tyler Perry's second movie. We all, of course, laughed hysterically throughout the film. (Me, without the aid of alcohol because that's how I roll).Watching the movie reignited Gabriel and Loren's repeated insistence that I follow Tyler Perry's career trajectory, cornering the Asian-American market instead of the African-American one. "Thai-Ler Par-Lee!" Loren often declares. "Get it? Get it?!" And in order to drive the point home, he'll write out "Thai-Ler Par-Lee" on a stray piece of paper and shove it in my face.To evaluate how best to approach the Asian-American market in question, Gabriel...
By: Bamboo Nation
Once You Have Rice...
2007-11-01 17:29:00 When my rice cooker broke recently, it was as if someone had ripped out a piece of my soul. But I never got around to buying a new one?so I resigned myself to lunching on spaghetti and sadly snacking on pieces of bread whenever I was hungry. (Just picture me, sitting on the kitchen counter top, head down, tears in my eyes, biting into a slice of Oroweat.)Well, the heavens rained down a miracle this weekend when Loren presented me with a huge-ass, 16-cup "Yan Can Cook" Aroma rice cooker. (Martin Yan endorses this mutha.) I could cater a Filipino pride rally with this thing!
By: Bamboo Nation
The Power of White
2007-10-31 09:30:00 There have been occasions in the not-too-distant past when I've thought about teaching English in a foreign country, as I'm sure many reasonably educated young Americans have. I've never pulled the trigger, and I never will?but it's probably for the best anyway, if what's happening in China is happening in other countries.Asian Americans who are native English speakers and born in the United States just don't get a fair shot at landing a job as an English teacher in China. Apparently, Chinese parents don't trust Asian-looking teachers as much as they trust white teachers when it comes to educating their children about the English language.How ridiculously discriminatory is it? The Los Angeles Times wrote about an Asian-American job applicant who kept getting rejected by Chinese employers primarily because he wasn't white. However, a white Australian who now works as an English teacher in Shanghai didn't even have to apply?he was approached by a faculty member on a bus and w...
By: Bamboo Nation
White People, She's One of Yours
2007-10-15 19:08:00 Loren, Joanne, Gabriel, Diablo, Jonny, and Donovan go to the same bar in Los Angeles just about every Friday night. I usually opt to tour the sights and sounds of downtown Glendale by myself instead because bars are way too loud for my sensitive ears and all the sugar from Shirley Temples makes me go up to guys and scream, "You're a hot piece of ass!"?and sometimes they get offended, especially when they're girls. But a couple weeks ago, my friends convinced me to join them.Everybody was already there when I arrived (except for Donovan who left to go to some lame improv thing). (See what happens, Donovan, when you go to some lame improv thing? You get written out of blog entries!) They all greeted me warmly, and I noticed a strange Caucasian woman in a cowboy hat whom I had never seen before. She was sitting next to Diablo and was practically rubbing up against her leg like a horny Shitzu. Because they seemed to be so close, I assumed that she was a friend from out of town or some...
By: Bamboo Nation
Koreans in Space
2007-10-12 20:41:00 Oh, please, like it was gonna be anybody else.
By: Bamboo Nation
Turning Filipino
2007-10-08 19:03:00 The San Francisco Chronicle has a podcast called Pinoy Pod, and I just came across an episode that is all about the recent APAture arts festival. In the show's description, it states, "This year's festival featured Filipino American artists such as playwright Prince Gomolvilas."Wait wait wait WHAT?!I am not now and I have never been a member of the Filipino race. I know the last name throws some people off, but, really, LOOK AT ME. In a trillion years I would never be mistaken as Filipino! Mistaken for Chinese, sure, but not Filipino.I am a proud Thai American, and I do not wish to be associated with a race that includes people like Noel Alumit. He's always trying to steal my thunder. And my man. Hands off, bitch!Look at Noel. Now there's a Filipino:
By: Bamboo Nation
Hot Air
2007-09-15 21:10:00 For about the first 10 minutes of Air Guitar Nation, now out on DVD, I seriously debated turning the thing off. This documentary is about the first annual U.S. Air Guitar Championships, and the American effort to "bring it" at the world competition in Finland, where air guitar contests are revered and where the "art" has been widespread in that country since the late 90s. I was having real trouble with the fact that there were only a few fleeting references to how absolutely ridiculous this topic is and that everybody involved?from its contestants to its leaders?seemed to be wholly aware of their own absurdity but demanded that their absurdity be taken seriously. One guy claims that air guitar is "the last pure art form," and he's not joking.But once the movie magically morphs into a portrait of America's top air guitar contenders?Korean American David Jung, whose stage persona is a Hello Kitty breast plate-wearing "C-Diddy," and musician Dan Crane, also known as "Bjorn Turoque"?i...
By: Bamboo Nation
Slutty! (But in a Good Way)
2007-08-10 21:47:00 I cannot convey to you how thrilled my mother has been over the fact that my younger sister was a cover model for D Sport magazine, which features drag racing cars and slutty Asian chicks and keeps horny teen boys, frat guys, and ITT students satisfied every month.Well, the Maternal Pride Goddess was not yet finished bestowing good fortune upon my mother, so my sister, who apparently models under the name "Panisa Steel," has just been named one of the Top Ten Reader's Choice Cover Models in D Sport's 5th anniversary issue. (The term "reader" is, I presume, defined rather loosely.)In her profile, she claims to be a Newport Beach native, which is a complete fabrication. I suppose she's trying to blot out the fact that she grew up in the seedier parts of Indianapolis, Indiana, and Monrovia, California, sort of like the opposite of how Vanilla Ice kept saying he was from the streets but was really raised in a cushy Dallas, Texas, suburb.My mother tells me that this month's magazine ...
By: Bamboo Nation
Experience What It's Like to Be Filipino...If Only for a Moment
2007-08-08 09:02:00 Thanks to Mad's Mad World for calling my attention to the fabulous Filipino Name Generator. When you go to this site and type in your own name, the site will create a Filipino first name, middle name, nickname, and last name for you because you know those Filipinos love having enough personal identifiers as to not be mistaken for anyone else. (It's hard to tell them apart otherwise, you see.)I am now officially known as "Michael Allan Too Fast Batongmalaque." Isn't that great?!Such fun names?perhaps that's why the Filipinos are so damn happy.All generated names, by the way, are real names from Pinoy sources, lest you question the program's authenticity. And, believe me, it's tons of laugh-out-loud, unintended genius. Just keep inputting your friends and family members, and you'll see what I mean.
By: Bamboo Nation
Hello Kitty, Goodbye Dignity
2007-08-07 22:04:00 Leave it to my Thai brethren to invent a punishment so painful and humiliating that human rights organizations really should look into this. In an effort to deter policemen from breaking the rules (such as littering or coming in late for work), their Thai superiors will punish their errant behavior by forcing them to wear hot pink armbands with Hello Kitty brandished on them like a scarlet letter.Police Col. Pongpat Chayaphan explains why the punishment is so so effective: "[Hello] Kitty is a cute icon for young girls. It's not something macho police officers want covering their biceps."For Chayaphan, I have one question: "Are you sure about that?"
By: Bamboo Nation
Asian American International Film Fest Kickoff Party
2007-06-28 16:00:00 "For all you kids with nowhere to hang out, there's always room in the M.A.T.H. Club." Tonight they "help kick off the Asian American International Film Festival" with drink specials until 11pm, a backyard garden, and free pizza while it lasts... This is a great bar so hey, why not? Oh... "The M.A.T.H. Club is the young Friends of [Asian Cinevision], comprised of a collective of writers, artists, and cultural enthusiasts. The M.A.T.H. Club will be hosting parties and events throughout the Festival, highlighting some of the best programs for you." Read More...Digg this | Email to a friend | Reddit
By: FreeNYC
Engaging Asian America:Opportunities and Challenges
2007-05-30 16:17:00 Engaging Asian America:Opportunities and Challenges By Suzanne Charle and Sunita S. Mukhi Engaging Asian America:Opportunities and Challenges presents the lack of understanding about Asia from Society and Culture sides. What are the challenges for increasing Asian American audiences? What are the opportunities for connecting with Asian Communities? This report offers some basic principles for successfully engaging diverse ...
90 percent Asian Americans go online: survey
2007-05-08 15:43:00 New York, May 8 (IANS) The Internet plays a critical role in the life of Asian Americans, including Indian Americans, with 90 percent going online and 70 percent visiting ethnic websites every day, a survey said. The third annual consumer research study conducted by communication agency interTrend’s Knowledge Center found that Americans of Indian and Chinese ...
By: Latest News
Nomination for 'Outstanding Asian Americans in Business Award' opens
2007-03-26 10:47:00 New York, March 26: The Asian American Business Development Center (AABDC) has announced its call for entries and nominations to honour Asian American entrepreneurs and business professionals with great achievements.
By: newkerala.com
Koreans making a presence during Asian American Film Festival
2007-03-11 21:58:00 Of 125 feature-length and short films and videos, the 25th San Francisco International Asian American Film Festival (SFIAAFF) is proud to offer more than 28 works by Korean and Korean American... iChoson Networks2.0
Koreans making a presence during Asian American Film Festival
2007-03-11 21:58:00 Of 125 feature-length and short films and videos, the 25th San Francisco International Asian American Film Festival (SFIAAFF) is proud to offer more than 28 works by Korean and Korean American... iChoson Networks2.0 |
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