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Jobhunting WANK
2008-05-30 09:40:00 So I apply for a position advertised on a jobs board, attach my CV and a covering letter. Then I get an email asking me for addition information. The link takes me to a page where I am asked to input my details again! Why? You've already got my details and everything you need to know! Why are you wasting my time? Fucks sake. Twats. p.s. I'm actually working, and it's loads better than my last job, but there are better jobs out there and I've set my sights higher this time.
Bus drivers are cunts
2008-03-29 01:39:00 It isn?t often I take a bus. Today just happened to be one of those days where I found myself having to take one. I was at work, I got let go early, Mrs. Wadd was there but she was staying so she kept the car for the day. I don?t mind taking a bus once in awhile as it is just extra time to catch up on some podcasts or listen to music. I can never do that at home.The bus terminal is about a block away from the office, the bus I needed to take leaves the terminal at 12:30. I looked at my watch as I left work, 12:28...shit looks like I?ll miss it. I hoof it up the block casually thinking I?ll have to wait for the next one which is a half hour later and low and behold as I turn the corner near the bus station I see my bus pull out of the terminal and stop at the traffic light. Fuck this is my lucky day, off early AND I?ll catch the bus after all.I run up to the bus, which isn?t at an actual bus stop but stopped none the less and tap on the door. The female bus driver with a bad haircut ...
By: Beyond the Neon
A Guide to Motivating your Staff for Bosses who are 100% Cunts
2008-03-25 20:51:00 Having worked Friday/Monday of the Bank Holiday weekend and being on call for the last 2 weekends to boot, one might say one is a little pissed off with work. One might even go so far as saying one is so fucked off with his current employment, the thought of telling ones boss where to shove his fucking job is one I consider on a nanosecondly basis and hence a list of ways to keep yor staff happy and productive, especially when they've been busting a gut for you so you can have a break in your company paid for camper van... read more
AUCTION OF DICKS AND CUNTS
2008-01-17 13:43:00 Wife : "I dreamt they were auctioning off dicks. The big ones went for ten dollars and the thick ones went for twenty dollars." Husband : "How about the ones like mine?" Wife : "Those they gave away." Husband : "I had a dream too...I dreamt they were auctioning off cunts. The pretty ones went for a thousand dollars, and the little tight ones went for two thousand." Wife : "And how much for
By: FILTHY JOKES
Advertising - Two Cunts in a Kitchen
2008-01-07 18:29:00 Two Cunts in a Kitchen, or sometimes, less graphically Two Cs in a K, is slang used within the advertising industry for a type of television commercial. Generally, the commercial shows two women in a domestic scene, discussing, using, or otherwise portraying the advertiser's product in a positive manner. An example of such a style of advertisement is a typical brand-comparison advertisement for a detergent or a household cleaning product.A 1959 advertisement for Pursettes tampons is classed as Two Cunts in a Kitchen. It depicts two women discussing tampons over coffee, one saying to the other "Of course unmarried women can use them!". Elyssa Warkentin characterizes the culture and assumptions behind such advertisements as showing "contempt ... for women both as consumers and as females".Now there's a real open conspiracy - the advertising and marketing industry really do sit behind closed doors to achieve a desired gain whether good or bad for society. lolIt's the way you sell '...
By: Secret-Teachings
Royal Mail are a bunch of SOFT KNOCKING FUCKS : Episode 2 - The Cunts Strik
2008-01-04 15:29:00 How is it that one company can generate so much content for this blog, and now, do it twice for the exact same fucking issue?? Do we now have to train postmen in the art of door knocking?! I mean, for fucking hells bells, not only does my house have a massive door knocker capable of informing all the Window Twitchers in our cul de sac we have someone at the door for them to have a nosey at, we also have this miracle device called a fucking door bell! read more
Royal Mail are a bunch of SOFT KNOCKING FUCKS : Episode 2 - The Cunts Strik
2008-01-04 15:29:00 How is it that one company can generate so much content for this blog, and now, do it twice for the exact same fucking issue?? Do we now have to train postmen in the art of door knocking?! I mean, for fucking hells bells, not only does my house have a massive door knocker capable of informing all the Window Twitchers in our cul de sac we have someone at the door for them to have a nosey at, we also have this miracle device called a fucking door bell! read more
GAME are cunts
2008-01-02 19:53:00 Today i thought i would make a super effort to buy some bargain games online (other than from ebay where prices are still being forced high by tossers who have no idea how to shop online). I went in search of some specialist game price comparison sites and i found a good few and also stored some good URL's for later use. read more
GAME are cunts
2008-01-02 19:53:00 Today i thought i would make a super effort to buy some bargain games online (other than from ebay where prices are still being forced high by tossers who have no idea how to shop online). I went in search of some specialist game price comparison sites and i found a good few and also stored some good URL's for later use. read more
Where are you all, you Scottish cunts?!
2007-11-19 21:31:00 As much as I love you all, my darling North American readers, I can't help but be a tad chagrined that I have barely any Scottish readers. Well, there is you, Mr "Anonymous" K in Edinburgh (why did you move there anyway? Aren't you from Caithness originally? At least that's what Wikipedia says. Why didn't you move to Glasgow instead?) but apart from that, and the odd other random Scottish person who pops up, I seem to be persona non grata in the Scottish blogosphere.Why is this? Don't people in Scotland read blogs? Or does what I write about just not appeal to the average Scottish reader? Or maybe I just don't comment on enough Scottish blogs.Sitting in a café right now, wishing that I hadn't called this blog "Slutty McWhore" as the title is clearly visible as I type this and I'm worried that the long-haired hippy behind me can see over my shoulder. Worse still, maybe the hippy is the one blog reader who actually lives in the town where I live. I've often wondered if this ...
By: Slutty McWhore
Royal Mail and the 40 Thieves
2007-11-06 20:46:00 It was recently my birthday, I get the odd thing from relatives, in many ways not that fussed but there we go, I am getting old :) Still I got home from holiday and there was a delivery card indicating I had something which did not have enough postage on it. Apparently 1.06 worth of postage. Okay I thought perhaps it is a parcel or something, easy to perhaps incorrectly apply the required postage for something like that. But... read more
'NO' To Anorexic Cunts
2007-10-21 05:07:00 Yay for Prada! In the world of freakishly-thin models (heck, there's even a Halloween costume for it!) Prada, one of the greatest and most influential fashion houses in the world, has made a bold move: Miuccia Prada chose a curvier mannequin to showcase a new sweater on the runway in Milan and a curvier model to actually strut the runway during a recent show.It's pretty sad when one mannequin and one model are such a big deal, but although it may be small it's a definite step in the right direction.Anyway, I think more curvier and healthier models are totally needed in our fashion industry. They are more of the norm than the skinny models, of whom the average person in no way looks like. We have dealt a harsh blow to the more plus size person and we need to see the beauty in all shapes and sizes. I think that's fair. And I think its about time. I hope more designers follow in Prada's footsteps. Let's bring on the curvy ones!Well bitches, repeat after me: say NO to anorexic cun...
Holidays Are Over... Back To School, You Obnoxious Little Cunts!
2007-10-08 02:24:00 Aren?t you glad that the school holidays are over? For a Bum like me, it means no longer enduring the audio-visual knitting-needle up the dick that was the shitty, mid-day ?School Holiday? movies, many of which featured the Olsen Twins. From here on, it?s re-runs of Desperate Housewives and The Drew Carey Show? the good shit! Oh, Mr. Carey? how I?ve missed your self-depreciating, bucolic, blue-collar humour! As an aside, I?ll have a lot more breathing room while I?m running errands at the mall. For the last two weeks, I couldn?t swing a dead kid without knocking over a few live ones, and it was too much for one man to bear. The worst thing about all that sweet, succulent, jiggling boy-flesh on display was not being able to grab a fistful, thanks to the constant Parental Firewall?. Of course, I?m just kidding. New Zealand children are much too ugly and fat to grope. However, they?ve got a little too much money these days, so I might think about robbing them in future. It would...
Racist cunts
2007-09-17 00:40:00 Check out this MP3 player…or more specifically, check out what it’s called - i.Beat blaxx. How did that one get out?! It is pretty though, despite the unfortunate name.
The Arty Bit: The Chapman Brothers ? Two Faced Cunts?
2007-03-13 14:35:00 I was busy preparing a soufflé last Thursday when my mind found itself meandering towards the Hashmark in a particularly round-about way, and I realised with a shock I had yet to come to a decision about what this week?s Arty Bit should be about. It had to be someone exciting, of course, controversial, preferably ...
By: The Hashmark
Fuck off, Brazil
2006-06-16 08:56:00 Jesus, Brazil were shit. Ronaldo was a fucking disgrace, the rest mediocre. Cafu was half-decent. It kills me that Croatia didn’t score with the massive chances they had. The were really on form tonight, man of the match Prso in particular, and could have made two easy goals had they managed what any footballer would do ...
Blasts from the Past
2006-05-18 14:56:00 Here’s a bunch of IRC quotes from bash.org to amuse you. Sorry I haven’t blogged in a while, but I went quite tired of it and want to spend time elsewhere. This will cheer you up, anyway… #99060 +(18677)- [X] t0rbad> so there i was in this hallway right BlackAdder> i believe i speak for all of us ...
Shel Israel, You Bloody Wag
2006-04-04 08:49:00 This is taken from the comments on a Naked Conversations blog post about Foldera, in which Shel Israel quite blatantly presents his stupidity to the world. He also quite blatantly presents his inability to spell. “Yo sound lke an unhappy comeptitor to me. Nothing more.” Ahaha… classy, Shel! Behold the uneducated, broke and quite happy 19-year-old Norwegian ...
Penetrating My Private Parts (you guessed it: punfest)
2006-03-30 22:41:00 I get a lot of spam, and I’m sure you do too. Right now I’ve got 954 of them sitting in my spam folder. It doesn’t usually bother me as it’s mostly picked up by the spam filter, but in the last few days and weeks I’ve been getting all sorts of spam in my ...
Incompetent Business Receives Unmerited Attention
2006-03-24 22:04:00 Lifehacker reports today that “Ajax word processor ajaxWrite tries to bring the look and feel of Microsoft Word to your browser.” Most of the advanced features are apparently left out, it doesn’t have collaborative features of Writely, currently lacks a spellchecker and doesn’t allow us to save our documents online. Wh-what? I can’t save my documents online? ...
Shocker! Blatant PR Stunt Pose as Elaborate Google Lawsuit
2006-03-20 12:41:00 Parental advice site Kinderstart.com filed a lawsuit against Google earlier this week (coincidentally the same day of the US government vs. Google trial) on the background of their Google Pagerank having dropped unexpectedly and without warning. The result: a 70% drop in traffic and a subsequent loss of 80% in advertisement income. Kinderstart’s argument is that ... |
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