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Watch Out For Those Handshakes
2007-11-06 05:21:00
Oh, the things kids will do to escalate a high school football rivalry. There’s stealing the other team’s mascot, spray painting lewd and profane insults on the front door of their school, sleeping with their quarterback’s girlfriend, and last but not least, stabbing their players during the post-game handshake. A 17-year-old Blake High School football player cut a Magruder High School player Friday night as players of the dueling teams were shaking hands during the postgame lineup, Montgomery County police said. The Blake student pulled a small folding knife from his pocket, cut the hand of a rival team member and attempted to cut a second player, said Cpl. Jimmy Robinson, a police spokesman. What ever happened to the good old days when kids just spit or urinated in their hands before lining up to congratulate their opponents? That’s how you’re supposed to secretly humiliate your opponents. The most shocking thing about all this is that somebody got ...
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Week 9 Monday Afternoon TPS Report
2007-11-05 09:04:00
Another Bill Belichick Lesson on How to Be Bland, Insincere, and Hackneyed Here is what the Patriots coach had to say after his team’s win: “It was a real good win for our football team. I was really proud of the way the guys played. We played 60 minutes, which you have to do against the Colts. They’re tough. They make you work for everything. But I thought our guys stepped up and made some big plays, especially in the second half and 4th quarter when we needed to, and all the credit has got to go to the players. They worked hard for this one—had a good week of practice, and they played hard today, and just made a few more plays than the Colts did.” Say it’s a good win–check. Say you’re proud of your team—check. Use the phrase “60 minutes”—check. Give credit to your opponent—check. Mention “big plays”–check. Give credit to your players—check. Talk about how practicing hard is impor...
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The Weekly Shakedown
2007-11-02 17:01:00
(Every week there are a number of that stories slip through the cracks here at Shakedown Sports. Here are just a few of them.) —I sure hope you didn’t miss it, but the NBDL draft was held yesterday. Former Net Eddie Gill was the first overall pick and Darvin Ham (that’s right, that Darvin Ham) was the 3rd overall selection. Other notable 1st round picks include former Saluki Jamaal Tatum (4th overall), Nik Caner-Medley(6th overall), former Celtic 1st rounder Kendrick Brown (9th overall), and Kevin Pittsnogle (11th overall). Spencer Hawes was chosen 8th overall, but the pick was disallowed when shocked NBDL GMs discovered he was already picked in the NBA draft. —Thanks to a small mix-up the Cleveland Cavaliers accidentally sold nearly 100 tickets to Wednesday’s season opener for $10-$25 less than they were supposed to. No wonder they can’t afford to re-sign Anderson Varejao. —Months after officially retiring their controversial Native Amer...
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The NFL Hates Houston and Oakland (and Cleveland)
2007-11-02 06:00:00
Oakland needed its residents to step up to the plate, and they came through big time. The Raiders game failed to sell out, and the ensuing blackout will allow them to watch the Pats-Colts game. The fans in Cleveland and Houston aren’t so lucky. There’s not much that could be done for the Cleveland fans (the game is on Fox), but with regard to Houston residents and the Oakland PR fiasco (fans encouraging people not to buy tickets), the NFL deserves a lot of blame. The league knew the Colts-Pats game would be the marquee matchup of the season and it shouldn’t have scheduled another late game on CBS. Having only one late game on a network is a fairly common practice (during week 12 there is only one late game on CBS and on the Sunday of the U.S. Open Final there were zero late games on CBS) and the NFL should have done it again this week. Simply put, there’s no excuse for the NFL to have scheduled another late game on CBS this week. I encourage all Houston ...
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UConn to ESPN: “You Are Evil”
2007-11-01 07:32:00
It looks like we can add the UConn athletic department to the growing list of people who think ESPN is abusing their power in order to promote their interests. This week Huskies AD Jeff Hathaway blasted ESPN for using the UConn football team to settle a dispute with Comcast. UConn’s next two games (important contests against Rutgers and Cincinnati) will both be broadcast on ESPNU, a network that’s not offered to any of the 525,000 Comcast subscribers in Connecticut. Hathaway claims that ESPN is robbing viewers of the chance to see the games in order to pressure Comcast into adding ESPNU to its packages. “The bottom line here is that I fully understand that the University of Connecticut and the University of Connecticut football program is being used by the network to leverage cable companies in our state … to add ESPNU to their platform,” Hathaway said. “We understand that. We know that’s what’s happening.” Oh by the way, UCon...
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Don’t Like Your Courtside Seats? Time For a Lawsuit
2007-11-01 06:34:00
They say that you can’t make all of your fans happy—and in the case of the Toronto Raptors, they have at least one fan who is very, very, unhappy. To be specific, he’s about $1.6 million worth of “unhappy.” That fan is Toronto businessman Mark Michalkoff. Last year he paid $120,000 for front row seats that were “right next to the coach”, but this season—after he had already paid for the seats—the Raptors informed him that they would be adding a row of seats directly in front of his. Michalkoff is now suing the Raptors parent company for $1.6 million in damages. Michalkoff, whose company also has Maple Leafs season tickets, said: “It’s like a real-estate development where they sell you an ocean view and then build another new condo closer to the water.” When he complained to [the Raptors parent company] about the new row of seats, Michalkoff said the company said he could sit and watch a game with their board ...
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Detroit Columnists Are Well Intentioned Idiots
2007-11-01 05:57:00
There was only one sports debate this Halloween—Did Jon Kitna’s costume cross the line? After a Detroit TV station showed footage of Kitna dressed as a naked Joe Cullen, two local Detroit columnists (Drew Sharp and Terry Foster) penned columns criticizing the costume. Sharp specifically chastised Kitna for bringing embarrassment to Cullen and his family by reminding everybody of the incident. He crossed the line this time and owes Cullen an apology, if for nothing else but for pushing that embarrassing evening back to the forefront of local consciousness. I understand that as a local columnist Sharp has some responsibility to address the incident, but by writing a column about the costume didn’t Sharp helped it become a national story and end up doing the same thing for which he criticized Kitna? We can never know what would have happened with the story if Sharp hadn’t addressed it, but the column certainly brought the incident the attention of many people ...
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The Arizona Rattlers Are Confident
2007-10-31 08:24:00
Joe Namath. Chad Johnson. The Boise Burn. They’re nothing compared to the Arizona Rattlers. The Rattlers, who went 4-12 in the Arena League last season, are guaranteeing that they will make the playoffs this season. If they don’t, the team has promised to refund every season ticket, a move that could cost them over $2 million. For whatever reason, managing partner Brett Bouchy seems unconcerned about the move backfiring. “If in fact it does happen, I don’t think it’s a terrible thing. How bad would it be? It’s for essentially a year. We hope to bring people back to buy season tickets for next year. It still would be a cash loss for us. It is a risk. But it’s a risk we’re fully aware of.” There’s nothing like winning over fans by demonstrating a complete lack of fiscal responsibility—it’s a strategy that seems to have worked for the Red Sox and the Yankees. Here’s my question. If the Rattlers need a ...
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The Phoenix Coyotes Are Sharing Their Music
2007-10-31 07:32:00
When it’s been five years since you last made the playoffs, it takes some outside-the-box thinking to generate fan interest. Fortunately for the Phoenix Coyotes, Wayne Gretzky has an iTunes playlist. The team has launched “Coyotes Trax“—a section of the team’s website where fans can view the iTunes playlists of Greztky, winger Shane Doan, goaltending coach Grant Fuhr, broadcaster Todd Walsh, and the Coyotes dance team. If you’re wondering whether Grant Fuhr has a playlist full of hip-hop, the answer is no. And shame on your for stereotyping one of hockey’s most famous black players. Fuhr’s playlist includes some older tunes from the likes of Bob Dylan, Nirvana, and the Smashing Pumpkins. In case you’re interested, Gretzky’s playlist features a good deal of Nickelback, a couple Nelly Furtado tunes, and a Sarah McLachlan song. Surprisingly, it doesn’t include Nickelback’s 2006 hit, “My Wife is an Insane...
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For the Record…
2007-10-31 06:41:00
Before the Sonics season kicks off I just want to reiterate, on record, that I do not think Kevin Durant will become a championship ring toting mega-star. For some specific reasons why, read this, and remember it when Durant becomes Keith Van Horn with more blocked shots. And now, some other quickie NBA thoughts… –I don’t know why some people (mostly you, John Hollinger) don’t think the Wizards will be one of the best teams in the conference. Before their three best players missed significant time with injuries last year, they were the best team in the conference. Sure, a good deal of their season is riding on whether Andray Blatche has a breakout year, but I think he will. Even if he doesn’t the Wizards have been good the last three years without any sort of competent big man and they should be able to do it again. They also have Dominic McGuire. Remember that name. If he gets the playing time he will be one of the NBA’s five best rookies...
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Rockies Pitchers Should Have Spernt More Time on Pitching
2007-10-30 08:48:00
If only Jeff Francis had spent more time working on his slider and less time on laundry… To randomly change the subject, Bill Simmons’ wrote a surprisingly good column regarding the Red Sox victory in which he makes an excellent point about the Yankees and Red Sox finally learning what to do with their money. They’ve realized teams are no longer allowing their good players to hit free agency and therefore the best thing for them to do with their money is invest it in their farm systems. Now they’re spending a lot on draft picks (see: Brackman, Andrew) and Latin American operations. Just Imagine if Latin American scouting improves enough that every decent player gets gobbled up by big market teams. Imagine if instead of spending $5 million on a garbage middle reliever, the Red Sox hire 50 full time scouts, statisticians, or analysts. Don’t you think that will give them an insurmountable advantage over the Royals? It should be interesting to see what...
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Better Gun Control For Dogs is Needed
2007-10-30 06:23:00
I’ve got good news for the crazy PETA activists who are fantasizing about Michael Vick being seriously injured by a dog—there is a group of dogs out there who have the necessary skills. A man was injured when hunting dogs stepped on his gun. Officials with the Iowa Department of Natural Resources say 37-year-old James Harris of Tama, Iowa, was pheasant hunting with a group about 3 miles north of Grinnell when the accident happened. Officials say the group had shot a bird and when Harris went to retrieve it, he put his gun on the ground and crossed a fence. As he crossed the fence, hunting dogs stepped on his gun causing it to fire. The grizzled outdoorsman took the bullet in his left leg and he should be able to recover. It’s obviously not the hunting trip he envisioned, but I guess it’s better than being shot by Dick Cheney. I’ve never really considered hunting a sport (sitting in a tree and shooting animals seems like more of a hobby to me), but if h...
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Week 8 Monday Afternoon TPS Report
2007-10-29 09:37:00
Don’t Miss… …Cedric Benson’s anger about all the criticism he’s getting. How angry is he? Here’s how he responded to people saying he needs more of a burst: “Do I need to run with more of a burst? No. And [expletive] them.” …The story behind the opening kickoff of the second half in the Vikings-Eagles game. In case you missed it, here’s what happened according to the NFL.com play-by-play. “D.Akers kicks 69 yards from PHI 30 to MIN 1. 28-A.Peterson ran ob at MIN 1 for no gain.” Sounds a little strange, right? Apparently Brad Childress spends too much time working on inducing illegal procedure penalties on kickoffs, and not enough time on pass defense. …The pure joy that’s overcoming J.P. Losman and Lee Evans now that they can play catch again. Here are some words from Losman: “Lee and I have a certain type of chemistry, a certain type of togetherness. It’s very, very special, espe...
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The Red Sox Are Happy
2007-10-29 08:38:00
I’d like to congratulate the Red Sox on having the lamest World Series celebration of all time. Jumping up and down with their hands in the air they looked like a bunch of 14-year old boys at a Good Charlotte concert. The only acceptable World Series celebration is a dangerous, injury-causing pile up on the pitchers mound. Shame on the Red Sox for that disgraceful little huddle they called a celebration.
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The Weekly Shakedown
2007-10-26 19:53:00
(Every week there are a number of that stories slip through the cracks here at Shakedown Sports. Here are just a few of them.) —A recent survey of NBA GM’s found that LeBron James is the favorite for MVP, and the Spurs are the team to beat. The poll also found that NBA GM’s don’t believe the Parker-Longoria marriage will last more than two years. —A disagreement between the Nats and the city of D.C. has left to team unsure about whether fans will be able to park at RFK and take a shuttle to the new stadium next season. The city doesn’t know if it will need the space for other events and therefore it’s still won’t commit to allowing the Nats to use RFK’s 10,000 car parking area. This isn’t the only parking problem the Nats have—apparently there’s also no room in the players parking lot for decent hitters. —The National Lacrosse League saved its season after the players union and the league agreed to a new c...
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Some Thoughts on Game 2
2007-10-26 07:58:00
–The feel of the game was just completely different without Becket on the mound—it felt like the Rockies had a chance. Watching Beckett in game one was like watching a game on tape where you know the outcome—only it was live. I was sitting there rooting for the Rockies but knowing they had no chance. It was like how I still root for Neil O’Donnell to throw a touchdown pass at the end of the 1994 AFC Championship game. –This was a game the Rockies should have won. Curt Schilling deserves a lot of credit, but he made a lot of bad pitches that the Rockies just flat out missed. It was a dismal hitting performance, especially considering how many times the Rockies got their leadoff guy on. –I can’t believe teams haven’t been sitting on Okajima’s changeup. It’s his best pitch and he throws it in nearly every key spot. He threw it on the first pitch to get Casey Blake to ground into a double play in Game 7, and he used again to ge...
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Clint Hurdle’s Game 3 Decision
2007-10-26 07:05:00
(Ed note: I was going to write this before Morales’ tough luck game 1 appearance (he’s not use to pitching out of the bullpen and the Red Sox got a lot of soft hits) and I’m sticking with it.) One thing is for sure. When Josh Fogg was let go by the Pirates I don’t think he ever thought he would be starting a World Series game. Even the Triple A World Series seemed like a longshot. But Fogg found a home in Colorado and Rockies manager Clint Hurdle now has him penciled in as his starter for game 3. David Ortiz is already so excited he’s leaving piles of drool everywhere. It’s a nice little story for Fogg, but Hurdle should be starting Franklin Morales. Fogg’s impressive NLCS performance is surely still fresh in Hurdle’s mind, but that was against a young Diamonbacks team that was willing to chase Fogg’s junk. The Red Sox will not be so kind. To beat the Red Sox a pitcher needs an out pitch. Fogg just doesn’t have one. ...
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NFL.com is Unaware of Chris Chambers’ Whereabouts
2007-10-25 16:40:00
The league’s website appears to be a little slow in reacting to the Chargers’ acquisition of Chris Cham bers . The image above is part of the Dolphins current depth chart.
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Josh Portis Shares His Widsom
2007-10-25 07:29:00
There’s only one thing to do when you lose your college football eligibility for cheating on a pop quiz—go talk to 5th graders about it. Maryland quarterback Josh Portis is currently touring elementary schools across the state, warning kids about the difficulties of college life. “I was just telling the kids you have to work hard every day in the classroom,” he said. “Life is going to be challenging. Unfortunately I made a mistake. Try not to make the same mistake I made.” Portis went on to tell the kids that his specific mistake was cheating off the person next to him, and that if they’re ever unprepared for a pop quiz the right thing to do is fake an illness or cheat off multiple people in the room. The most important thing to remember, he told them, is that if you get caught it’s not possible to get out of being suspended by bribing Ralph Friedgen with donuts. He always has a cabinet full of them.
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Somebody Get the Idaho Statesman a Phone
2007-10-25 06:36:00
This week’s “Lazy Journalism Award” goes to the Idaho Statesman for their reporting on Coby Karl’s bid to make the Lakers roster. (For those who don’t remember, Karl is George’s son and a former Boise State walk on.) On Wednesday the Stateman gave us this information. Former Boise State basketball player Coby Karl was one of 15 players listed on the Los Angeles Lakers’ roster Tuesday on the team’s Web site. That could be good news for Karl, who is trying to become the first former Bronco to play in the NBA since John Coker. Talk about investigative journalism! What dedication the Stateman staff must have to go through the trouble of looking at the roster on the Lakers website. I know it would be a big step, but maybe if Karl ends up making the team somebody could call a member of the Lakers organization and get some information that 4-year old couldn’t find. It’s just a suggestion.
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The American Baseball Championship Starts Tonight
2007-10-24 19:29:00
Did you know the Rockies are 13-1 this year when the Broncos are coming off a loss the previous week. The Steelers may have just ruined the Rockies chances. Anyway, without further ado, here’s my World Series prediction: I have no fucking idea who will win. I do, however, think one of two things are likely to happen. The first possibility is that the Red Sox will show the American League’s superiority is the only thing that matters. Beckett will get them started with another shutout and they’ll sweep the Rockies. The second possibility is that the Rockies will show that no matter who you play you need to be doing a lot of things right to go 21-1. The Red Sox won’t be able to win in Coors Field and the Rockies will beat them in five with flawless postseason baseball. Of course nobody ever predicts a lopsided series because if their winner loses they look like an idiot, and so everybody will probably just end up saying Sox is six or Rockies in seven. The...
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ESPN Will Be Livin’ La Vida Reilly
2007-10-24 07:48:00
When I heard that ESPN had pried Rick Reilly away from SI, one thing came to mind. What is ESPN smoking? For a network that attempts to be young, hip, cool, and promote its personalities across all forms of media, this move makes no sense. Reilly hasn’t proven himself to be popular outside the back page of a magazine, and I find it hard to believe that ESPN’s readership (which is used to Bill Simmons’ back page column) will warm to Reilly’s writing. The only explanation is that ESPN is making a big push to overtake SI in the magazine industry. Maybe ESPN thinks if it can convert enough old time SI Reilly lovers, it will finally be able to rise head and shoulders above SI. It’s like when you’re playing a game of Risk and after slowly and conservatively building up armies you attempt to end the game by attacking your opponent’s most powerful stronghold. Unfortunately for ESPN, this is a terrible move, and not just because Reilly isn’t ...
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Another Dunleavy? Oh Yes!!!
2007-10-23 19:00:00
It’s been five long years without a Dunleavy in college basketball, but the wait is now over. James Dunleavy (Mike’s son and Mike Jr’s brother) could see some time this year as a walk-on for Tim Floyd at USC. Here’s my question. When Coach K was recruiting Mike Jr., he famously told Mike that he hadn’t wanted a recruit this bad since Grant Hill. So Did Floyd tell James that he hadn’t wanted a stiff white guy this bad since Brian Scalabrine? That would have sold me on USC. According to Dunleavy Sr. James “has big-time range, pro-three range, a quick release,” and “he’s a pretty good passer.” Of course the only thing missing is the guidance of Coach K that would undoubtedly turn James into a superstar. (Wait…how did this turn into a Duke bashing post?) Despite being lightly recruited, Dunleavy hopes to get better. Or at least taller. “The doctor says I’ll keep growing,” he said, “so ...

The Rivera-Jeter Postseason Paradox
2007-10-23 07:29:00
With Mariano Rivera ’s future as a Yankee in doubt, I figured it was time to revisit the paradox of calling both Rivera and Derek Jeter two of the all-time great postseason players. For both players (particularly Rivera) the numbers seem as though they cannot lie, but is there more than meets the eye? First let’s start with Rivera. In 76 career postseason games he has an 8-1 record, a 0.77 ERA, and a WHIP well under 1.00. He also has four World Series rings. Those things seem to unquestionably make him one of the all time greats. But here’s the problem. Rivera has also unquestionably cost the Yankees two World Series titles (I’m of course assuming the Yankees would have beat the Cardinals in 2004.) In 2001 Rivera blew a World Series clinching game 7 in Arizona. Then three years later he blew an ALCS clinching game 4 in Boston. Nobody knows if the Yankees would have won those first four World Series’ without Rivera (probably not), but if it weren&r...
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Week 7 Monday Afternoon TPS Report
2007-10-22 10:41:00
The Problem With Chad Pennington Chad Pennington is a solid quarterback. He’s extremely accurate and generally makes good decisions. Unfortunately, he has the arm strength of an 8-year old girl. If the Jets get a lead and their defense is playing well, it’s not a problem. It is a problem (as it was on Sunday) when the Jets trail late and Pennington has to orchestrate a long drive in a short amount of time. On Sunday Pennington took over on their own 12, down by 8 with 1:42 left. He needed to throw the ball 15-30 yards down the field. He needed to take some chances threading the ball through zone defense. Most importantly, he needed a stronger arm. Pennington’s arm simply wasn’t strong enough to make the throws he needed to make in that situation. There’s was no point in him even trying. The chance of success was almost zero. Pennington tried to dink and dunk his way down the field instead, but the Bengals eventually caught on. Seconds later Jo...
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%$*@%&*@*#&#@*&
2007-10-22 09:41:00
Some thoughts on the ALCS… –It is now officially insane for anybody to argue that there shouldn’t be instant replay in baseball. Kenny Lofton was safe at 2nd on his 5th inning single. There is no reason the right call shouldn’t be made. Give each manager two challenges and be done with it. World Series champions should not be determined by blown calls. Yeah, it’s only one play but you never know what would have happened after it. The fact is, there is no place for missed calls of any kind in game 7 of a playoff series. I’m still amazed that there are actually people who argue against replay on the grounds that it will ruin the tradition and purity of the game. You know what’s pure? Getting the call right. –You have to feel bad for Casey Blake. It’s always nice when an average player finds a home and becomes a productive player on a good team, but Blake could be a little too replaceable to survive any kind of backlash in ...

The Weekly Shakedown
2007-10-19 20:52:00
(Every week there are a number of that stories slip through the cracks here at Shakedown Sports. Here are just a few of them.) –Indiana officials say that Kelvin Sampson’s recruiting violations were discovered by an intern who was reviewing previously approved phone records for an NCAA progress report. The blame here is all on Sampson. He should have done a better job endearing himself to the athletic department’s interns. Hopefully now he has learned that Boggle is not an appropriate end-of-the-year thank-you gift. –Some NHL players have begun practicing with a special heated skate blade that allows them to go faster by reducing gliding friction. The blades are powered by a rechargeable battery and small microprocessor in each skate.  The skates seem like a good idea, and they can get Al Gore’s green endorsement there’s no telling how successful they can be. –Certain advocates, including Dennis Kucinich, are beginning to make a fuss that ...
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The NFL Wants to Be Your 12-Year Old’s Teacher
2007-10-18 08:32:00
Good news parents!! The NFL wants your kids to learn about money. The league has teamed up with Visa to create “Financial Football”, a pigskin themed video game that teaches kids about money management. In order to prove it’s more philanthropic than the NBA, the NFL is stepping up efforts to provide schools with free copies of the game. In the last month schools in Pennsylvania, Colorado, and Ohio have started using it to teach kids about things such as banking, finance, and accounting. The game requires students to correctly answer questions about money management in order to move the ball down the field. Wrong answers can lead to sacks or penalties. (Interestingly enough, if you play as the Lions sometimes even correct answers result in sacks or penalties.) Although “Financial Football” is intended for kids, it might be wise for the NFL to make a version for its players. Clearly, they need some help managing their money, and a video game might be the perfect way to pro...
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An Ode to Todd Helton
2007-10-18 06:48:00
It’s rare that you catch an athlete saying what he’s actually thinking. I had the pleasure of covering last March’s Atlantic 10 tournament, and even the 19-year old kids from schools smaller schools like Richmond and Fordham only spewed forth the standard soundbites about defense and playing hard that they knew the media wanted. I’m not criticizing them—if I was in their shoes I would have done the same thing so that I could get back to being with my teammates—but that’s the reason why Todd Helton ’s post-game interviews have been the most refreshing thing about this year’s playoffs. From the “I don’t know how we just won that game” remarks after the Rockies clinched the Wild Card, to the game 4 NLCS interview in which a dazed Helton kept repeating “This is unbelievable”, the Rockies first baseman has showed a degree of bewilderment, honesty, and authenticity that you never see from professional ath...

Mike Tomlin=Doc Brown
2007-10-17 09:30:00
Mike Tomlin never ceases to impress me with his talents as a football coach. So far this season he has brilliantly handled Alan Faneca’s difficult contract situation, seamlessly brought in a new regime after 15 years of Bill Cowher, and led the Steelers to a 4-1 start. But this week in Denver Tomlin could top all of that when he defeats the laws of science. In order to help his team adjust to the Denver altitude Tomlin claims the Steelers will use a mysterious “blood flow” machine. The only problem is that nobody seems to know what it is or that is even exists. Jack Daniels, who heads the U.S. distance running program at the Center for High Altitude Training at Northern Arizona University in Flagstaff, Ariz., was baffled at the “blood flow” machine that Tomlin said will be used on the sideline Sunday night. Daniels is unaware of any such machinery or how it would work. “I don’t know what he’s talking about,” Daniels said. &r...
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