Pulling A Blyleven

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Comcast Is Stoopid
2008-06-04 01:54:00
Hey everybody, I get blocked from Orioles games because I live 300 miles away from Baltimore! So I can't watch the game because Comcast doesn't carry whatever channel the O's play on. So... dammit.TOP 1STWV: Not to worry: we'll soldier on with a radio feed. RK: Firing up Gameday!WV: So, TV on the Radio. Bleh bleh bleh my baaaby. Bleh bleh bleh lay hands on me.RK: Hey now, I like TVOTR. So much I say TVOTR instead of TV on the RadioWV: That's a sure fire way to know you like them.RK: Come on Invisible Slowey, strike that anonymous gray batter out!WV: With video games et al., my imagination and my gut experience the same kind of atrophy.BOTTOM 1STWV: Now that you're relegated to audio, do you appreciate the extra oomph Gardy puts into "bathroom caulk" in his Local Hardware spots?RK: I'm still watching Good Eats - puff pastries sonRK: Hm, The Chairman was also in the Island of Dr. MoreauWV: I hear he's not really the nephew of the original Chairman. I'm considering going all J...

An Impending Sense of Dread
2008-06-03 00:44:00
PREGAMEWhich is pretty much how I start every day. Kidding! Kind of. Whatever. So what happened over the weekend? I was incapacitated up in DC from Fri-Sun, and I see there was a heartbreaker of a loss and Nikolai Blackburn took a liner off the nose. Does that about sum it up? Hey, whatever, only a game out of first place!This optimism may sound manufactured, but Dandy Andy Pettite is just one of those guys who owns the Twins with no rhyme or reason to it - like Mussina does his transformation into Don Drysdale, Pettite cleft in his chin deepens and he becomes someone else when pitching against the Twins. Coupled with Livan on a Jet Plane's flaccidity against the Yankees, we may be in for a long night - but I refuse to believe so! Kubel will come through for me - assuming he's in the lineup. Research it, you say? Bah! I wonder who our announcers will be for the evening. I'm hoping for Orel Hersheiser and Rick Sutcliffe.TOP 1STYes, Orel! He looks like what Damien from "The Omen" w...
More About: Sense

Meat Sweats and Other Food Comas
2008-05-30 01:53:00
PREGAMEI'm kicking myself for giving up on last night's game - I should learn to be more hardcore. But also the Twins should remember that I'm a quarter of a century old, and staying up past midnight too many consecutive days makes me put on my crankypants and tell kids to get off of my lawn. And I don't have a lawn.Tonight's danger - I made blue cheese cheeseburgers. You know the kind that you put the cheese crumbles between two patties and melt some on top? Oh yeah, that. Best one of those I ever had was at the St. Clair(e?) Broiler. Man, I love that place. I could talk about food all night, and I would, save for the fact that this here is a baseball blog and I shouldn't be so stupid. Tonight we have Slowey Gin Fizz up against Kevin (Dave? Dan?) Hochevar, who sounds like he should be doing weekend sports for the Valley's choice, KVLY News 11.It's a Fargo thing.TOP 1STWhoa, the Royals read Cargo like a book there. I can't imagine he's been that far away from stealing the ...
More About: Food , Meat

The FUTURE
2008-05-29 01:51:00
PREGAMEI know I speak for WV as well when I say that at PAB, we have democratic (small d) considerations. As in, we like things that are democratic, not that we care much for the American electoral spectrum. ANYWAYSo we're looking at this app called ScribbleLive. It would allow people to put stuff on one post (or so I think, WV runs the technical stuff here, and that's why the Praise/Bury hasn't been updated in years). Because we love the chaos of a bunch of people clamoring, I try to address comments that we get in the posts themselves, but I think ideally we'd move to posts made up entirely of comments from us and hell, anybody else who felt like piping up. I'm intrigued by these possibilities, more as this develops. Whooooooa, we're halfway thereTOP 1STWell, so far Zack Morris Greinke is on pace to strike out 27Good work, Joe, breaking that upBOTTOM 1STOh Bon Jovi. Not a great start. This does not bode well.Bases loaded, nobody out, just where you want them!2 outs for one r...
More About: Future , The Future

Calves of Fire
2008-05-28 01:44:00
PREGAMEHey everybody, hope you all had a blast on Memorial Day, grilling out, fishing... um, grilling those fish, perhaps, for synergy's sake. I climbed a mountain over the weekend. Just one day actually, and the mountain isn't too terribly tall (1500ft. ascent) But holy hell are my legs sore still. I could try to make a parallel to a major leaguer's regimen of playing every day and the toll that must take on their bodies. But instead all I'll say is this: peanut butter sandwiches never taste so good as when you're on a hike.Tonight's pitching match-up is downright mythical: The Dread Pirate Roberts Blackbeard vs. The Incredible Hulk (I can never remember if it's Bruce or David Bannister in the story. Maybe it's both depending on the source. I'm easily confused).TOP 1STOh, I still have some time. I don't know if I've addressed this or not, but WV hasn't been around much because he is still in school, that sucker. Because the Cardinal is on a quarter system, he pretty muc...
More About: Fire

Eli's Coming
2008-05-22 02:12:00
TOP 1STNo pregame today, but who's counting? There's nuts on Good Eats, and lord knows I love me a nut or two. I really like cashews, but I would argue that pistachios are the best nuts on the planetAnd Nikolai Blackburn is looking good so far. Whaddya suppose the odds are Boof joins the bullpen? Because there's just not enough righties in the bulllpen.Hamilton needs to sit down and think about all those RsBI he has. He uh, has a lot. Probably more than the entire Twins rosterBOTTOM 1STSpeedy Go[m]ez, even you can't bunt super hard like that and beat it out. Look at it this way NOT Wade Boggs, you gave some guy a souvenir.Mauer is just giving the Pontoon the business at the plate, which is good to see. Even when he's in the hole, he's a cool hitter in the box.The other JM almost beat the shift, but you gotta tip your cap on that play. The pontoon, not so good of late, and hey, I like this above .500 thing, so we should uh, keep that going.And that's baseball analysis, son.TOP...

What is a Quality Start?
2008-05-21 01:50:00
PREGAMEAs you know, I watch Jeopardy! a lot. Maybe you didn't know that. I always think "Oh I could so do that" between handfuls of Trader Joe's dried apricots (at least in this one instance), but then I don't take into account the fact that it's harder than it looks. You have to buzz in right and you're on stage and there's like, real money at stake, so maybe just confidently blurting out the answers isn't gonna actually get you anything? Unless you're Rosario Dawson in White Men Can't Jump.Oh yeah, anyway, after a long game with many pitchers last night (Bon Jovi as a PH?) we could really use a quality start tonight.Anyway, let's watch some baseball.TOP 1STOooh! Lobster on Good Eats!All we need is a pitcher named Embers, Cracker Barrel and Waffle House, and we'd have the roadside diner thing pretty much covered. Call up Dan Ponderosa!And he'll be squaring off against Johnny Mathis. It's not for me to saaaaayHaha, at first I thought the Treasure Island scouting report ...
More About: Start , Quality

Robo-Boogie
2008-05-20 03:02:00
TOP 4THWhat's going on, party people? I see the Nachos Rancheros are up 2 to 1, and because BOOOOOOOOF is pitching, I assume that means all of those runs are from gopherballs. Then I see him throw a 4-pitch inning. That's pretty good. Hey, I like robots, do you like robots? I'll post videos with robots in them periodically, yeah?BOTTOM 4TH, RACHEROS 2, GEMINI 1It's a good thing, being a disappointment in other peoples' lives and them disappointing me, that the Rubik's Kubel comes through with a knock when he needs to. Of course, he didn't go to SOUVENIR CITY! But perhaps laterSpeaking of Souvenir City, I have to say that BBTN is more enjoyable lately, the guys seem to have more fun, and crack wise at each other. Crack wise. I'm 80 and your grandpa. Could it be the noticeable absence of Karl Marx Ravich?People who live in the MPS, is there a building sentiment against Joe Vavra? I don't know the pulse, but yeah, the bats, they are silentI'm about to curse.Double-fuck you, m...
More About: Robo

Back From The Grave
2008-05-15 01:56:00
PREGAMEWell I'm done. It's submitted approved, electronically stored, and you can't see it for 3 years! Whee! Not that anybody's looking but... y'know. And I've been partying here, DC, and everywhere in between. Yep, including Ironto, Roanoke, Salem, Buena Vista, Lexington, Staunton, Harrisonburg, Front Royal and not really I'm kidding. So what's going on here? Roy Halladay huh? Should be awesome.TOP 1STRK: I just want to start this game by noting that even I was kind of surprised at myself when I downloaded a best of Level 42 albumWV: Nice, I like your game. Boof vs. Halladay, I like these odds.RK: Odds of a 4-inning start?WV: Those odds have to be pretty good, and that means we'll have an endemic Sars plague later on.RK: Remember when people took SARS seriously in the late '90s?WV: Ah yes, the days off $2 gas.RK: Que the hell? Why is Casilla playing short? He can't play second!WV: Sand Castle just toppled... How about a 2 inning start?RK: It's what the starters have be...
More About: Back , Grave

The Dirty Truth
2008-05-07 01:21:00
I'm not abandoning you guys, I promise. But let me tell you the insidious nature of this self-flagellation some people call "graduate school." - As you know, I've defended my thesis. That doesn't mean it's "done," and in fact I'm making revisions- When I submit it to the grad school for publication (which you can't see for 3 years! Nobody's taking my research!) I have two weeks to make edits and changes THEY think I need doing.Getting it defended? That's only the start. But it seems our boys are winning when we don't blog, so what does that say? Nothing, it's a coincidence, and correlation doesn't prove cause!
More About: Truth , Dirty

I Don't Know Much
2008-05-03 01:07:00
And neither does Aaron Neville. But whatever. As WV alluded to earlier, I did successfully defend my thesis on Wednesday and have been non-stop with the family wholesome partying since then. These defense panels are no joke! So no game for me tonight, kiddos, I've got beer pong on patios to think about--RK

1st Place Means It's Cool To Say Bitch Sox Again
2008-04-30 19:41:00
PREGAMEShort pregame today, but thought I should give a shout out to RK who is defending his hopefully-completed thesitation today. BOTTOM 2NDHaving spent the weekend in Minneapolis and mercifully getting a reprieve from blogging the last couple of games against the Rangers, we try to return to form (very much like the Twins themselves) in a day game blogging extravaganza.If only there were some kind of form to return to....A Nick Punto walk! Just steal 2nd and between you and me we can call it your 1st extra base hit. Just when we thought Gardy had gotten over his infatuation with LNP he goes and starts him a bunch of times in a row. The old switch and bait this was...Go Go Go to the bench. The only thing Gomez's speed amounts to these days is how quickly he can make an out. TOP 3RDToby Hall - Mike Redmond = 0. As in, they are equal entities. Love this Pacific Time Zone, nothing like a baseball game starting at 10 in the morning. Eating Cinnamon Toast Crunch and listening to Bert ...
More About: Cool , Bitch , Place

Let's Try This Again
2008-04-24 03:50:00
PREGAMEI've been grading papers all day today, so I sure hope Boof lifts my spirits a little bit tonight. I just thought of something. As you all know, in Michael J. Fox's magnum opus Teen Wolf, his loins are afire (after all, the werewolf thing is one big puberty metaphor, right?) and they are torn (thankfully metaphorically) between the girl next door Boof and... Pamela? I think? Some anonymous early 80s blonde with tastefully feathered hair and shirts with oversized collars. Like they did.Bonser certainly has hair that is OC (outta control) and is sort of werewolfey, and hell, it might not be the most sophisticated relationship, but Ima call Boof Teen Wolf. Couldn't have said it better myself.TOP 1STAlright MLB.tv, this is unacceptable. I paid a bunch of money to be able to watch the games and I can't watch the damn games.So I have to watch the lowest resolution and I can't use Mosaic; this is why I paid for premium?Heads up play, Joe! Well, I'm not missing much anyway, and...

I Could Have Sworn I Just Saw Al Leiter Pitching For The Mets
2008-04-23 04:03:00
PREGAMEI use MLB Mosaic, as you know from my many and numerous frustrations, and one of the six screens is a "Baseball tv channel" and I swear I saw Al Letier warming up to pitch for the Mets . I looked him up, and it looks like he's inactive, but why in God's sweet hell would they show him warming up from year ago? I mean, I know he's a notoriously slow pitcher, so perhaps he's still pitching his last game from 2005?WV is in Oakland tonight, and has good seats, meaning 300 yards from the field (The Coliseum has a looooot of foul territory people, which was good in 02, am I right!) so you're stuck with me, but I don't know for how long. I've been grading papers all day and I have my cranky pants on. Harrumph.1STAnd hey, it's time to gripe again! Mosaic is crapping out on me and my connection is super choppy.So what's going on in the game? How's Bon Jovi doing? How am I doing? What's the meaning of it all?I see the inning is over. But not because I saw it. Really puts a cra...

Elrond Returns to Rivendell; Frodo Responds With 75 MPH Heater
2008-04-20 19:59:00
PREGAMERK: 2 special weekend blogs? See how good we are to these people?WV: And don't let them ever forget it! I won't mention that our special weekend sessions are more of a comment on our respective social lives than on loyalty to the reader base.RK: My liver hurtsWV: Well would you keep that to yourself, see I don't want to be a bad role model for fresh-faced Rocket Bats.RK: I'm sure he'll be fine. I bet he brought a canteen of the waters of RivendellTOP 1STRK: Jim Rich? Who the hell is that? I can only handle 3 people per sports broadcastRK: That's why I can't watch Barry Melrose on Sports Center...well, one of many reasonsWV: Jim Rich sounds like a pseudonym.RK: Yeah, like a major character in the Westing GameWV: So Adam Everett is on the DL, with strict doctor's orders not to hit or swing for a week. So pretty much he doesn't need to change a thing, right?RK: He and I are on the same training regimentWV: I don't know man, you probably work your triceps harder at Wii...
More About: Frodo

You will find me in the matinee, the dark of the matinee.
2008-04-19 21:18:00
PREGAMEShort pregame, have to see how Wally Zerrrrbe'ack and the Cavs are doing against the Wiz (who could incidentally use some of their magical alchemy to come up with some better unis). Today it's Blackburn v. Westbrook, which by my accounts could phonetically pass for a dual at the O.K. Corral. In reality though, we've got two ground ball pitchers with questionable curve balls.Addendum: Let's all give RK a pat on the back for finishing his Masters thesitation. That's right. I created a new word for that 120 page behemoth. TOP 1ST I LOVE inning-ending double plays, I do, but Punto's near-errant throw has me wondering if the Pear King put a curse on the Metrodome turf on his way out of town. BOTTOM 1STLet the Garko puns commence!! I can tell it's Mauer's birthday because karma is with him---that line shot did result in a force out at 2nd, but not a double play. I can feel it--good things are going to happen today. I bet that when Waste Management decided to sponsor the "Cl...
More About: Find , Dark , The Dark

They Said It Was Fhqwhgads!
2008-04-18 02:08:00
SHORT PREGAMENot much to say, gotta pay attention to Good Eats tonight - Alton's teaching us how to make mac-n-cheese. Easy you say? Yeah, if you use a box, but I'm gonna do this like three the hard way.One word will suffice: BOOOOOOOFTOP 1STThis recipe looks good, but I also see that an unearned run has crossed the plate. Who lost it in the lights? I want names!BOTTOM 1ST, RAYS UP 1I'm so making fried macaroni and cheese tomorrow.TOP 2NDSpan? I can't believe it! OK I can. Has Hinske always killed us, even when he was with Toronto? Or Boston? Who the hell has he played for?Bonser... looks like a prairie dog who is popping out of his hole to say hey what's up guys.Double play! BOTTOM 2ND, TBR 2 MNT 0How is Joe Va-va-vroom still hitting coach? I think Telly needs to Telly it like it is and say hey, maybe it's time for a new guy.You wanted to win now, huh Dlmon? Try hitting a dinger.I'm a big believer in you, Kubel Khan. Everybody looks ugly sometimes.TOP 3RD, SAMEkayla, how doe...

Soldiering On
2008-04-17 02:04:00
PREGAMEAs many of you know, I (RK) am a graduate student at Virginia Tech. At the anniversary of those shootings that rocked our world, I have only to note this: I refuse to have my life interrupted by the media recreating the spectacle. Most people's experience with the shooting was seeing the media trucks everywhere and things being blocked off by police tape. That's been recreated and I don't think it's good for any of us. If any Hokies read this, live for 32.But there's an increased police force, which is exactly the kind of stupid irrational thing that we don't need. Blacksburg is a safe town, we don't need guards at the doors of now infamous Norris Hall. Finally, you may have heard snippets of Giovanni's poem, but I doubt you've seen the whole thing. Here it is, reprinted:We are Virginia Tech. We are sad today and we will be sad for quite awhile. We are not moving on, we are embracing our mourning. We are Virginia Tech. We are strong enough to know when to cry and sad...

Don Sutton, I'm Coming For You!
2008-04-16 00:34:00
PREGAMEI (RK) would like to take this very special opportunity to tell you about my weekend adventure: The Search for Don Sutton."I spy, with my little eye..."So I went to the Nationals game last Saturday. But there was a rain delay:"My love handles and I are sad!"I was getting antsy:"I can see FOREVER"Then we heard HOF pitcher Don Sutton was a sportscaster for the Nats now after the Braves, and seeing as how we were like right next to the press box, we'd keep an eye out for him and if anybody else came out we'd yell and ask if we could meet Don Sutton:Loyal reader TL and RK on the lookout for Senor SuttonNope, he's not over there - ZOMGWTFBBQ!!!!1!! there he is!"It appears as though I have eaten my lips! This will make eating dippin' dots much more difficult!"But he wasn't there either. And then the game started so we gave up. We did, however, find the coolest hot dog stand ever:"Excuse me, we're looking for Senator Larry Craig"We have no taste at all. Let's hope that bullpe...

Technical Difficulties
2008-04-15 01:13:00
People, I'm trying my damndest to get the game on, but Mosaic says it can't determine my location for blackout purposes, and mlb.tv says I'm logged in concurrently in more than one place.I hope this is just a technical error and not that someone has hacked my account. Yikes.
More About: Technical

Epic Literature, Meet Glam Metal II: This Time It's Personal
2008-04-12 02:12:00
Weekend....hot dogs.....baseball....tired.....comments.. .open post. RK and I aren't worth much tonight, show us how it's done in the comments.Recap later.--WV and/or RK
More About: Personal , Literature , Metal , Time , Glam

Cherry Blossom Girl
2008-04-10 01:27:00
PREGAMEPeople, as you may or may not know, I'm about 3 weeks away from being a MASTER OF ARTS at Virginia Tech, and to keep my sanity in the quaint little town of Blacksburg, I often escape to the District of Coloumbia (sorry Mark Penn!) I'll probably have missed the cherry blossoms by that point, but two things:1. Did you know that the only city with a higher concentration of cherry blossoms than DC is Newark NJ of all places? I used to live there too. I'll probably move to Japan soon.2. I'm going to a Nats game. Because really, it's been too long since I've seen Cristian Guzman. Having friends who work in high-powered high-stress DC lobby/law/politics firms have access to good tickets. I can't say no. So I'm not gonna be around really this weekend. Prepare yourselves for that eventuality now.I was going to be all web 2.0 and post a youtube video of the excellent Air song "Cherry Blossom Girl ," which is nice to listen to if you're painting or washing the dishes or making g...

KC and the Fluorescent Dome Light Band
2008-04-06 19:35:00
PREGAMEIf we're going by the career ERA of today's starting pitchers, the Twin are expected to lose 4.77 to 4.62. Pythagorean this Pecota that, this season has to be about exceeding expected outcomes. So: BOOOOOOOOOOOOF! Don't suck. TOP 1STFirst and foremost, it's Bert's birthday. And golly do I want that baseball cake hat that he's wearing. "Win one for me Boof. Come on BOOOOF". Seriously Boof, are you going to let Bert down? It's totally justified to include Bert's birthday in the scouting report. Really, Boof's going to need some kind of magical temporal alchemy to avoid those requisite 4.77 runs. I've been imagining Trey Hillman to resemble Sean Penn in Fast Times At Ridgemont High. It's a real disappointment that he's closer to Tom Selleck. BOTTOM 1ST"Gardy likes calling him [Tolbert] a humming bird"----Somebody's jealous of Ozzie Guillen. Rather than biting at your ankles and consuming human flesh, this group of weak hitting scrappers sucks nectar and flies backwa...
More About: Band , Light , Dome , Fluorescent

Epic Literature, Meet Glam Metal
2008-04-05 18:53:00
Both MLB.TV and MLB Extra Innings cling steadfastly to their draconian "no TV for you on Saturday before a certain time" policy. Thus RK and I are gameless, but not all of you will be so feel free to comment here or in the Chat Box. Bon Jovi will be chucking the leather for our side, while Gilgamesh will defy pitching for the Royals and try to live up to his ridiculous-but-not-so-ridiculous-seeming- anymore contract.I like our chances.
More About: Literature , Metal , Glam , Meet , Epic

Telly Hughes Is On The Case
2008-04-05 03:44:00
NBBlogger is stupid. Put this together in your heads with the post belowTOP 6THApparently Telly was on to our linking to his blog (Go Here) because tonight's post was magically deleted. The pregame was redeemable through Technorati caches, however. In any case, RK had to go attend to domestic tranquility, so you are all stuck with me here on out. Telly, I'm onto your bag of tricks. Like ending every blog post with an exclamation point. Should've patented that shit buddy...If Rocket Bats keeps pitching like this I might have to...shiver...refer to him as our staff ace. Any more shots to the mask like that one, Joe, and those SI covers will disappear quicker than my tax refund just did (on salt water taffy, expensive books for next semester, and a tank of gas, incidentally).RK dislikes anagram machines, adopting the DIY punk aesthetic, but I can't resist searching for Mark Grudzielanek. To wit:Amaze Drunk Leg IrkGlazed Arm Nuke IrkGrazed Real Kink MuOh, and nice inning ending doub...
More About: Case , Hughes

Pray For Mojo
2008-04-05 02:01:00
PREGAMEHere's the thing:1. Congratulations to the J (of SJ fame) family, on their recent addition. See what happens when you come here a lot? We take a personal interest. It also helps that we had lockers next to each other and SJ gave me coke and Oreos like whoa. Anyway, Mazel Tov to you and yours, SJ2. It's a weekend, so you're not here reading anyway, right? If you are, I have a question to ask you about Schopenhauer's cat3. We're gonna half-ass posts as long as the team decides to half-ass-bat (what?). I'm heading out at some point anyway to boogie. We're bringing that word back, people. Boogie boogie boogie.TOP 1STRK: Good to see Rocket Bats still looks like the love child of Peter Pan and LegolasWV: I'm just happy that one of our cool nicknames is still on the teamRK: Grudzielanek would be a hard name to anagramWV: I really feel like I've lost track of how many Guillens there are in the leagueRK: According to Joe Morgan they're all either Guillen or Rodriguez. And th...
More About: Pray , Mojo

Oh Word?
2008-04-03 20:27:00
RK and I are busy today being summoned by the suits for rank and file busy work. Rank and file workers, but not rank and file minds. So if you too are stuck in a cubicle, let your mental freak flag fly by leaving comments in the Chat Box or in the comments of this post. -WV
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From Blackbeard to Blackburn
2008-04-03 01:59:00
PregameRK: Nikolai Blackburn (I don't know his first name so I can make one up) sounds like a Russian mysticWV: Ah yes. Up there with my other favorite mystic, Dionysius the AreopagiteWV: In any case, he apparently shops at the Joe Mauer Sideburn EmporiumRK: I shop at the Beck Wispy-Eighth-Grade Olde Tymey Sideburn ShoppeWV: I'd grow a pair of mutton chops myself but in my quest to become a carbon copy of my father i've had to settle for a porn star mustache and nothing elseRK:I have a soul patch so my students think I'm hip. I think what we've learned here is that facial hair is like baseball. Somehow. Huh. Apparently life isn't an episode of ScrubsRK: It should be noted that LAAAAAAAAAAAA pitcher Joe Saunders is a HokieWV: It should be dually noted that this Telly character seems frightfully out of place. I will miss Bert's awkward flirting with Marnie.RK: Also, Telly Hughes has a blog, and it's so bad I don't want to link to itWV: I think Marnie's still around - doing s...

A Reasonable Expectation
2008-04-02 01:52:00
PREGAMEI'm a the real is the rational person. As some of you may or may not know, neither WV nor I live in Minnesota. He in San Francisco California, and I am tucked away in Blacksburg Virginia. Forget DC, I have cherry blossoms outside my apartment! Also, the city with the highest concentration of cherry blossoms in the US and A is Newark New Jersey. Hard to believe, I know. The point? I've lived in a few cities with cherry blossoms, and that's probably been a good thing.But I like living in Hokieland. The Hokies seem to have that Minnesotan "Be good, but not THAT good" mentality (See recent NIT and loss to SJ's Jayhawks in the football). As you are well aware, however, I don't get Twins games.So how do I watch them? I drop down some major bank to get mlb.tv ULTIMATE FIGHTING. Premium. Whatever. And you know what the coolest thing is? Mosaic! I can watch a million games at once except - it's not working. I called the customer service line and the first thing they say is that ...

A New Era
2008-04-01 00:40:00
PREGAMEWe begin anew. I know what you're thinking: "How will we win any games without him?" "He was the heart and soul of this team!" and "It's getting close to dinner time. For what am I hungry?" But we have to let him go. So long, sweet prince. A flock of angels sing thee to thy second home run.JASON TYNER"This lemonade is pretty good - oh, I should work on my power stroke?"It's the end of the Tyner Era. But don't get nostalgic: Jason Bartlett's not walking through that door, So-and-so Pirdie's not walking through that door, Lew Ford's not walking through that door (he teleports through the interwebs), Dustan Mohr's not walking through that door. But we do have some mashers. And some young pitchers. And guys battling their tail off and playing small ball and doing the right thing and putting chives on their baked potatoes and understand that a kiwi has more Vitamin C than an orange (true fact).Maybe the summer won't go their way without Tyner's leadership and slap single...