The Diary of An English Courtesan

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An Escort And A Mystery...
2008-02-23 21:42:00
The English Courtesan had a curious call a few weeks ago from what some escorts might call a timewaster. Only the English Courtesan wasn?t sure if he was a timewaster or someone whose gentle but persuasive fantasies got the better of him. The English Courtesan still doesn't know quite what to make of the whole episode, hence today's blog post...read on...The English Courtesan doesn?t advertise her number and she takes a deposit so she usually manages to avoid what escorts call timewasters. People that want to meet the English Courtesan send an email saying what day and time they?d be free to talk and then she calls them, withholding her number for the first call. If all goes well, the English Courtesan asks for a real name and details of the hotel booking and supplies details of how to make the deposit.Like any other escort, there are some checks the English Courtesan does on names and she verifies the hotel reservation. However she tends to do that only after she receives the dep...
More About: Mystery

Shower Scene With The English Courtesan
2008-02-21 00:59:00
It looks like Moggy and Winter are busy doing something else tonight, ahem, so the English Courtesan supposes that she and the readers will have to wait for them to share with the class in the fullness of time. So in the meantime, by way of a post in haste, the English Courtesan thought she?d share a little clue about why she?s late for the day job deadline with the readers...The clue comes courtesy of the health and safety police at a rather nice hotel with which the English Courtesan is acquainted. It?s a comical comment on the nanny state and perhaps the state of the dumbed-down-and-prone-to-suing nation. Has English education really become so utterly worthless that hotel guests need to be told not to fall out of the shower?The English Courtesan will forgive this particular hotel as she likes their boudoirs and she likes their sense of humour too. She also likes Hitchcock and naked ladies in showers but that?s a topic for another day.However the English Courtesan is heaving a big...
More About: Personal , Travel , Films , Scene

With Love From The English Courtesan...
2008-02-17 00:42:00
By way of a belated Happy Valentine's Day and fashionably late as ever, the English Courtesan thought she'd share a favourite poem with the readers today. The photo is of a rosebud, not unlike the English Courtesan's own...ahem... ;-)The poem, 'The innocence of any flesh sleeping', is from Brian Patten's Love Poems. It's one of the most tender and beautiful poems the English Courtesan has ever read and that's why she wanted to share it with the readers.The English Courtesan hopes that those of the readers who are blessed with a companion they love will whisper a few lines of this poem in their ear as they sleep tonight. She hopes that those of the readers who don't have such a companion will find one some day soon, and discover for themselves the delights of watching a loved one sleep.Sleep is one of the English Courtesan's very favourite things. She's a night owl but she always manages a good 8 hours as she believes that sleep restores us to who we're meant to be. If sh...
More About: Personal , Poetry , With Love

A Quickie With The English Courtesan III
2008-02-14 00:46:00
?How the bl**dy H*ll?? muttered the English Courtesan crossly ?does M*ggy know what a bow thruster looks like?? ?And while we're on the topic of nautical nous, since when did Mr. Tickles and VJ know their transoms from their toe-rails??It looks like the English Courtesan's fiendish clue Part I and the English Courtesan's fiendish clue Part II weren?t half as fiendish as she intended. The readers, and in particular the Terrible Threesome of Tickles, Moggy, and VJ, have made mincemeat of her mysteries this week, despite the kind and furry Anonymouse?s attempts to divert them.So here?s how it was meant to go. At the first fiendish clue, the English Courtesan?s readers were meant to leap off down the hotel path and suggest a few suitable landlubber locations. At the second fiendish clue they were meant to think plughole and suggest someone was inspecting the English Courtesan?s pipes. At the third fiendish clue, the photograph above, they were supposed to merely marvel at the evil ge...
More About: Travel

A Quickie With The English Courtesan II
2008-02-09 16:22:00
This clue should be contemplated in conjunction with the English Courtesan's previous clue. To be honest, this clue is unfair. Unless you share a certain hobby with the English Courtesan's Paramour Du Jour, you just don't stand a chance... The trouble is, the English Courtesan's clues don't even belong to the same species. That's because it would have to be out to see it from this angle and in fact it was in when the English Courtesan was there.'That's because it's more fun when it's in!' added the grinning Paramour. 'Quite!' said the English Courtesan, whooping with glee and doing a little jiggly dance at the sheer fiendish genius of the clue... ;-)Technorati Tags: courtesan, courtesans, escort, escorts, travel companion, travel companions, travel, luxury travel, cluesThe English Courtesan...naughty but nice! xxx
More About: Travel

A Quickie With The English Courtesan
2008-02-07 00:05:00
'After a few long-winded posts...' said the English Courtesan, 'It's time for a quickie!'. 'Ooh yes!' replied the readers enthusiastically. 'Ra-therrrr Livvy!' Now it has to be said that the English Courtesan isn't famed for her quickies. She's a ponderous creature, languid and leisurely as a general rule, but with lewd and lusty interludes when the occasion arises....However the English Courtesan and the Paramour du Jour can vouch that there's a lot to be said for a quickie from time to time. Especially when, like the English Courtesan this week, you're having a bit too much fun to write all about it...cue another irritatingly mysterious smirk... :-)So the readers' challenge for today, by way of their very own quickie while the English Courtesan is playing away, is as follows.Q: Where has English Courtesan been?.A: The only clue you're getting is that it's not what it looks like... ;-)Technorati Tags: courtesan, courtesans, escort, escorts, travel companion, travel ...
More About: Travel

The English Courtesan On Luxury Lingerie For Lovers II
2008-02-02 15:19:00
Further to the previous post on luxury lingerie buying tips for wives, girlfriends and modern day courtesans, the English Courtesan has had some worried enquiries from the readers. From the English Courtesan's mailbag, it would seem that there's more than one gentleman out there whose significant other either doesn?t have a lingerie drawer or has a woefully neglected lingerie drawer...The photo shows a rather cute bit of luxury lingerie from Damaris, from whose website the English Courtesan purloined the photo. So today?s post is by way of guidance on what to do if your lady friend doesn?t buy lingerie but you fancy turning her into a modern day courtesan. If she wears no lingerie at all, ever, then you probably don?t have an issue with seduction. That means you can forget the whole topic of luxurious lingerie and spend the time on something more constructive than reading the English Courtesan. Constructive things include giving your wife or girlfriend less commercial forms of ple...
More About: Luxury , Lingerie , Lovers

The English Courtesan On Luxury Lingerie For Lovers...
2008-01-30 15:28:00
January is almost out, there's love and perhaps a little lewdness in the air for a few lucky readers, and that can only mean one thing......Oh yes, the English Courtesan's international gentlemen readers are worrying and writing in to their Maiden Auntie Livvy about their lingerie for Valentine's Day!The photo shows a rather delightful set of hipster brief, bra and garter by luxury lingerie purveyor Spoylt, from whose website the English Courtesan purloined the photo. The set depicted is called 'passion' and is meant to serve as inspiration for terrified troubadours and eye candy for luxury lingerie lovers...To be fair to the fearful, it's not their own lingerie that the English Courtesan's readers are worried about. It's what to buy for their wives and girlfriends for Valentine?s Day, hence their increasingly panicky enquiries to the English Courtesan. Should it be a black ruffle boyshort with halter neck bra? Would she like a set of burlesque diamante nipple tassles (and i...
More About: Luxury , Lingerie , Lovers

Courtesans, Caricatures & Carrie Jones
2008-01-26 02:51:00
The English Courtesan got an email from a client this week with an interesting link. The Daily Mail's interview with Carrie Jones , author of 'Cutting up Playgirl: A Cheerful Memoir Of Sexual Disappointment' was worth a read on its own. However far more amusing was the client's email which said ?Oh my God, Livvy, I think this woman is my wife!??For the purposes of today?s blog, the English Courtesan?s client would like to be called Barry so that he?ll rhyme with Carrie. That wasn?t the English Courtesan?s choice but Barry can be very persuasive so she?ll let him have his wicked way for now?as it were? ;-)?Cutting Up Playgirl: A Cheerful Memoir Of Sexual Disappointment? is an autobiography based on Carrie Jones' sexless marriage. 'Carrie Jones' is of course a nom de plume. ['Just like Barry White!' interrupts the client excitedly at this point. 'Yes dear' says the English Courtesan in a soothing tone of voice.] The Daily Mail, usually a staunch supporter of all things middl...
More About: Caricatures

Find A Valentine With The English Courtesan
2008-01-23 14:23:00
?Not got a Valentin e yet?? enquired the English Courtesan tenderly of the readers, with the gentlest and kindest of smiles. ?Not got the budget to book one either??. The good news is there?s still time and you shall go to the ball with a suitable escort too!Fear not, my darlings, for the English Courtesan really does think of everything. Today she is proud to present exactly what you need to find a special friend for Valentine?s Day and for the price of less than a drink in a London bar. The English Courtesan herself may be booked up but you can still get some on Valentine's Day if you follow these instructions!Just order a pack of these fabulous little cue cards, go out to a nice bar, and slip it into the hand of a suitable looking suitor of either sex. No, not that, or you?ll get arrested. The English Courtesan meant the card. Slip the card into the hand of a suitable-looking suitor.At just U$5 for a pack of 25, it?s got to be worth a try, hasn?t it? If your hit rate is 100%, tha...
More About: Find

Hotels For Meeting Escorts
2008-01-20 00:12:00
The English Courtesan?s post on hotel hospitality seems to have struck a chord with the readers. This week she has been inundated with rants and recommendations on good hotels for escorts?So listen up, luxury hoteliers of the world! The summary is that clients meeting escorts in hotels want lots of fluffy towels, a decent room service menu and complimentary upgrades. If they?re staying overnight they like in-room entertainment and a gym. Escorts visiting hotels like plenty of parking, hair conditioner in the bathroom, and a map or at least a postcode on the website.Both clients and escorts like a discreet front desk which doesn?t smirk and late check-out with non-aggressive housekeeping. Clients are enraged by reservations lines that ask too many questions (a passport number is something your escort is unlikely to volunteer), whilst escorts are enraged by clients who say ?it?s the Holiday Inn Leeds? or ?it?s the Radisson Edwardian London? (there are quite a few of both).Hoteliers wi...
More About: Hotels , Meeting

The English Courtesan Spreads Them...
2008-01-16 22:37:00
Today's headline shouldn't come as too much of a shock to those readers who have been paying attention to the English Courtesan. However it's not actually that sort of spreading to which she's referring... :-) 'No, my lovelies, it's here but it's also there!', said the English Courtesan, striking a Le Penseur pose and giving her readers a mysterious smirk... This week's hot news is that the English Courtesan has trotted off with her basket of snacks to Spread Magazine! It seems that Vixen and the readers of Spread are hungry too (must be all the Spreading) so the English Courtesan is on a mission of mercy to spread meaty treats amongst international madams and mistresses across the Pond (see below).Those of the readers who have yet to acquaint themselves with Spread Magazine might like to know that it's the last word in all things lewd and a voice for the sex industry. It's witty, it's scandalous and it's downright dirty, albeit in a blue stocking type of fashion. You c...
More About: Spreads

The Edible Travel Companion Part II
2008-01-12 20:37:00
A New Year and a new clue for the English Courtesan's readers! The photo shows a rather nice basket of complimentary snacks in a hotel somewhere in Yorkshire. The snacks themselves are no more, alas, as the English Courtesan and the Paramour Du Jour saw to that, but the memory of a delicious evening remains...The English Courtesan knows a thing or two about hospitality trays. Like any other escort or call girl, she sees a lot of hotels and she often thinks there's nothing sadder than a luxury hotel that lets itself down by skimping on the rations. Whereas boutique hotels in the UK seem to have caught on that snacks matter, the English Courtesan can think of at least one famous London five star which gives its guests just two sachets of beastly Nescafé and a couple of measly ginger nuts by the bedside.Scratchy bath towels, a bad biro, and the absence of fruit or a newspaper on the breakfast tray, are other sins of that particular establishment. The English Courtesan is not a moaner...
More About: Travel , Part , Edible , Companion

The English Courtesan On Sex-Kitten.Net
2008-01-06 17:02:00
No, my lovelies, it's not here today...this week's hot news is that the English Courtesan has moved into The Guest Room at Sex-kitten.net!Oh yes, spread out against the peachy silk curtains of Gracie Passette's inner vestry, you'll find the English Courtesan being interviewed by the delicious and delectable Secondhand Rose. Secondhand Rose is a former escort who became a writer, phone companion and conversationalist. She does indeed have a second hand and she's currently using to...no, too much detail...you'll have to ask her... ;-)Those of the readers who have yet to discover Sex-kitten.net might like to know that it's an online boudoir 'dedicated to helping women regain their purrs'. It has book reviews ('because slutty girls read too'), erotica ('because even mistresses like a little bit of something on the side'), lingerie ('because it's more fun to bicker if you're wearning nice knickers'), polls (the English Courtesan is out of rhymes at this point but recent ...
More About: Kitten

On Courtesans & Escorts
2008-01-05 23:51:00
The photo is a tree. It's not a special tree, just a rather straggly tree, marooned in an urban car park in Yorkshire. The English Courtesan was struck by the way it was lit up by a flickering streetlight and a winter sky. It?s a metaphor for the fact that even when you can?t find grace in yourself, you can find it in what?s around you. ?Only connect!? as E.M. Forster puts it.Perhaps the English Courtesan's tree was also a salient reminder, in the season of commercialism, that it?s the little things that make us happiest and the simplest things that make a difference. Like a text from someone you love.Do any of the readers find, as the English Courtesan does, that the New Year feels rather like the old one? That's just an observation, not a complaint. Consider it a postcard from the frozen North tonight, stamped with the wistful but smiley head of the English Courtesan and hand-delivered to your screens tonight...Why is it, the English Courtesan wonders, that we expect the New Ye...
More About: Escorts

The Edible Travel Companion
2008-01-03 01:44:00
Question: What do you do when you have no wireless connection, no mobile signal and it?s blowing such a gale that you can?t even get the front door of your own castle open? Answer: Why, you get creative with a culinary companion of your choice, of course! Which is just what the English Courtesan and her chosen Companion did in their hideaway high up in the hills of...nope, you'll have to guess... ;-)Whilst most of their artistry must remain a matter for private consumption, the English Courtesan?s Companion turned out to be hilariously well-equipped for travel to remote parts. His set of bizarre but surprisingly useful travel accoutrements included sellotape, eggs, a wire coathanger to get a radio signal, edible rice paper, and an eclectic selection of international literature including Zola?s Le Ventre de Paris, Alain de Botton?s Status Anxiety and Murakami?s Kafka On The Shore.However his pièce de résistance turned out to be a chocolate reindeer, hence the photo captioned Cruel A...
More About: Travel , Books , Edible

The Courtesan's Christmas
2007-12-29 17:17:00
The English Courtesan thought the readers might like a clue as to where she is spending the festive season. Answers on a postcard to the usual... ;-)Technorati Tags: Courtesan, courtesans, escort, escorts, international escort, international courtesan, travel, international travel, travel companionThe English Courtesan...naughty but nice! xxx
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The English Courtesan On Criminalising Prostitution...
2007-12-22 17:37:00
?They said I gotta go to rehab, but aaah said, nooooo, nooooo, no!? sang the English Courtesan in a growly voice, doing a little jiggly dance round Amy Whitehouse?s big beehive...No, no, no, before the readers write in to chastise her, it?s not that the English Courtesan has been snorting things, for she is a clean-living creature, apart from Marlboro Lights and cake. No, it?s rather that, in the ultimate failure to wish hookers a happy Christmas, the British Government is pondering criminalising prostitution, with fines and possible prison for clients, and a dose of rehab for prostitutes. Yawns. Should the English Courtesan just go and have a nap at this point or would the readers like to discuss, once again, why criminalising men who visit prostitutes is a really bad idea?It was MP Harriet Harman who kicked off the debate again when she said on BBC Radio 4?s Today programme last week that she supports criminalising men who use prostitutes as a means of tackling sex trafficking. It...
More About: Prostitution , Prost , Rosti

Filling Your Stockings With Orgies
2007-12-19 01:22:00
Does anyone share the English Courtesan's weariness with enforced seasonal jollity? Have the readers, like the English Courtesan, been to four mince pies and mulled wine parties this week and counting? If so, the English Courtesan is delighted to bring you the perfect antidote to works dos...wait for it...it's orgiastic chewing gum!The English Courtesan loves Christmas, she loves her day job and she loves parties. She just prefers not to mix them. Hence the latest item in the Filling Your Stockings series which is guaranteed to spice up the most tedious works do.The English Courtesan is of the opinion that there are only two types of Christmas works party in the UK. The first is of the let?s-get-drunk-and-hump-each-other-like- puppies-in-corners variety, as commonly demonstrated by footballers and corporate slaves. Wives are not invited to these and taking your own mistress is usually frowned upon too, as you?re really expected to pick one up in situ. That type of party starts out ...

Belle de Jour - Secret Diary Of A Call Girl III
2007-12-15 15:46:00
The English Courtesan was irritated by an article in The Guardian this week about Belle de Jour - Secret Diary Of A Call Girl . The readers may recall that the English Courtesan previously wrote about Belle de Jour ? Secret Diary Of A Call Girl here and here. Those readers who missed it on TV can catch up on the whole of the Belle de Jour series and see Billie Piper in her smalls here. The English Courtesan is not suggesting for one moment that the good readers would be swayed by a lady in lingerie, but she hopes they'll watch it in the name of art.Anyway, the English Courtesan was delighted to hear the news this week that there?s going to be a second series of Belle de Jour ?The Secret Diary Of A Call Girl, but she was disappointed by the predictable media response. Why is it that the British media persist in seeing all escorts, call girls, courtesans or whatever you like to call us, as crack whores who are enslaved to both the patriarchy and their own addictions?Several things irr...
More About: Films

Filling Your Stockings With Orgasmic Moans
2007-12-12 16:08:00
After a relatively urbane and sophisticated post on Saturday, the readers will be relieved to hear that the English Courtesan is back to form today. She's about to introduce the readers to a new friend?wait for it?you?re going to love her?say hello to?Moaner Lisa! Much as the English Courtesan is delighted to include her in Filling Your Stockings , it has to be said that Moaner Lisa doesn?t exactly look like the girl of your dreams. The English Courtesan isn?t a critical creature and her friends and lovers come in all shapes and sizes. However if the truth be told, Moaner Lisa?s hair colourist has let her down and so has her bra. She?s a jolie laide who has lost her jolie.However give her a bottle of beer and Moaner Lisa becomes a very different woman. Note the glazed expression and the position of Moaner Lisa?s hands, and you?ll realise that her mind isn?t really on looking decorative. Those of the readers who read the post on the Singapore Kiss will know where the English Courtesa...

Filling Your Stockings With Sheep
2007-12-08 11:56:00
Sheep! Don?t you just love them? Admittedly these boys are unlikely to fit in your stockings, but the English Courtesan couldn?t resist including them in Filling Your Stockings on the grounds of their astounding beauty. Designed by Hanns-Peter Krafft, and handcrafted from real sheepskin with little leather ears and solid wood legs, these life-sized beauties are filled with wood shavings and are robust enough to be sat on. All right, that?s enough! You can stop sniggering at the back there. The English Courtesan would be grateful if the readers could overlook the word associations of sheep and shagging just this once. Tsk!Now the English Courtesan would be the first to recognise that a sheep is for life, not just for Christmas, but there?s something peculiarly festive about this lot. Imagine the hours of harmless fun you could have restaging home nativity scenes for your frenemies, complete with 9 hour Virgin Birth labour scenes. Or inviting all your neighbouring dog owners round for...
More About: Sheep

The Return Of Filling Your Stockings
2007-12-06 00:53:00
Thanksgiving has been and gone?the English Courtesan is staging nightly raids on the chocolate advent calendars?the USB snowman is flashing merrily upon her desk?the postman?s arms are getting longer by the day?this can only mean one thing for the English Courtesan and her readers?sound of jingly bells?oh yes, 'tis the season for Filling Your Stockings again!The English Courtesan knows the readers have highbrow tastes so where better to start than with the tasteful fridge magnet depicted? This little beauty comes courtesy of those nice people at Sticker Giant who are purveyors of such fridge magnet and bumper sticker classics as ?I love group sex?, 'My other ride is your girlfriend' and 'My dick would make a better vice president'.For the group of English language students in Japan who always write in to ask the English Courtesan to explain the jokes, she should perhaps mention that 'ride' is American for motor car, Dick Cheney is the American Vice President, and oral sex is....
More About: Return , The Return

International Travel Tips For Courtesans & Escorts
2007-11-28 15:25:00
The photo shows one of the English Courtesan?s all-time favourite and most memorable travel destinations which she visited with one of her all-time favourite and most memorable people...It?s not a clue, because it?s much too easy for the clever readers, but there?ll be bigger and better clues to follow from the next trip...watch this space... ;-)Anyway, the English Courtesan has been rather remiss of late in keeping up with the 'How to be an escort' series. However over the past few weeks she has had a good few gentle reminders from the kind readers so herewith the English Courtesan?s tips on international travel arrangements for escorts, courtesans and travel companions.Whether this post will apply to you as an escort depends on whether you see clients outside your area. Most escort girls and courtesans do travel, and many travel on an international basis, at least on payment of travel expenses or subject to a minimum booking period. However there is a certain amount of debate ov...
More About: International , Travel , Travel Tips , Tips , Escorts

The English Courtesan Reveals All...
2007-11-28 14:41:00
Today?s post was supposed to be a ceremonial unveiling of the answer to the English Courtesan?s fiendish clue. The readers were meant to be gazing in awe at the photo of the answer and marvelling at the English Courtesan?s evil genius. What d?you mean, the readers already guessed it? ;-)Technorati Tags: Courtesan, courtesans, escort, escorts, travel, cluesThe English Courtesan...naughty but nice! xxx
More About: Travel

The next erotic clue...
2007-11-24 14:42:00
The English Courtesan was mightily miffed that the readers managed to solve the last clue within all of about 3 minutes, so this week's clue is a little more difficult! The readers' challenge is to answer the following: where in the world can one see the word 'arse' in 3 foot concrete letters?The English Courtesan likes the word 'arse', especially when pronounced with a Somerset burr. Say it now with Livvy, all together now, 1...2...3... 'arrrrrrrrrrrrse'. Now a little louder, adagio molto, with a long low shake of the appropriate body part, 'arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrse'. There now, doesn't that feel better? Never let it be said that the English Courtesan doesn't give her readers therapeutic shared experiences...ahem...as it were... ;-)This clue is in fact somewhat topical as the English Courtesan likes to show that she's up to date on modern popular culture. Part 2 of the readers' challenge is to complete the following sentence: 'English 'f*******' is in the doldrums'.'Le...
More About: Erotic

Where is the English Courtesan?
2007-11-21 19:34:00
?Where is the English Courtesan and why is she so slow in replying to emails?? asked the readers. ?Mmmm? said the English Courtesan with a mouthful of something rather tasty... By way of an apology and a token of esteem, she sends the readers this faintly erotic photographic clue as to the whereabouts and whatabouts of the English Courtesan this week. Answers on a postcard to the usual! :-)Technorati Tags: Courtesan, courtesans, escort, escorts, travel, companion, cluesThe English Courtesan...naughty but nice! xxx
More About: Travel

The Courtesan And The Geisha II
2007-11-18 11:20:00
Dragonfly's wings are broken. You can read the story in Dragonfly's own words here. Those of you who haven't met Dragonfly should know that she is the proprietor of The Okiya, where the English Courtesan has gone this evening. She is also a dear friend to the English Courtesan from whom, as the readers may recall, she received a well-deserved Rockin' Girl Blogger Award some months ago... Dragonfly is one of the kindest and gentlest creatures the English Courtesan has been blessed to meet. She is a purveyor of peace, pleasure and poetry to weary travellers and she is always ready to hold out a hand and offer a listening ear to anyone who needs one. She has welcomed the English Courtesan to the Okiya on several occasions, just as she has welcomed countless others who had lost their way on life's path and needed a cup of tea and some kindness.But Dragonfly has lost her own way now and the English Courtesan needs the readers' help to mend her beautiful wings. Please say a prayer f...
More About: Personal , Travel , Poetry , The G , Geisha

The USB Pole Dancer
2007-11-14 23:19:00
The English Courtesan is sorry to say that she has failed miserably in her quest to find a suitable escort with a USB port for the person searching for a ?USB escort for my laptop hamster?. However after a long and arduous search she has found what she hopes the readers will consider a decent substitute?Ah yes, it?s the controversial USB pole dancer! As the searcher in question was from the US (the English Courtesan could see that too in her web statistics), she should perhaps explain the cultural context. The USB pole dancer caused something of a scandal on the funny little island of England last year when Marks and Spencer, mecca of the middle England masses, started selling her for £19.50 at Christmas. Cue moral outrage from the Tory MP Ann Widdicombe who called the poor dolly ?cheap and tawdry?. M&S promptly took all the bikini clad gyrating lovelies off the shelves, less than a week after they first went on sale.As for the USB pole dancer?s attributes, erm, well, they?re pr...
More About: Pole , Dancer

Hunting The English Courtesan
2007-11-10 08:42:00
The English Courtesan is delighted to note that the peculiar searchers of the worldwide web are coming out of the woodwork this week. As the readers know, the English Courtesan has her geeky moments and she confesses to a secret fascination with web statistics and in particular keywords...For those of the readers who are not of a technical bent, keywords are the terms people type into a search engine to find the English Courtesan?s blog. Here?s an example of one that left the English Courtesan particularly baffled. When someone types ?wife humps dog? into a search engine, what exactly are they looking for? Is it that they want a wife that humps dogs or is it that they?re pondering divorcing their wife because of her dog-humping antics and could do with a lawyer who specialises in the dog-humping field? Is it that they?d like their wife to hump the dog and they need to find a polite way of broaching the subject with her or are they looking for a psychologist who can help the wife wit...
More About: Yorkshire , Hunting